do 6 year olds get homework

Home » Tools for Your 6-Year-Old » Homework for Your 6-Year-Old

Homework for Your 6-Year-Old

Listen to an audio file of this tool.

Now Is the Right Time!

As a parent or someone in a parenting role, you play an essential role in your 6-year-old child’s success. There are intentional ways to grow a healthy parent-child relationship, and setting up a daily homework routine provides a perfect opportunity.

Children ages 5-10 are in the process of establishing critical learning habits, including how they approach homework, that will extend throughout their school years. For most children, homework is a nightly reality. Children who have a parent or someone in a parenting role involved in supporting learning at home and are engaged in their school community have more consistent attendance, better social skills, and higher grade point averages and test scores than those children without such support. 1 Indeed, the best predictor of students’ academic achievement is parental involvement.

Yet, there are challenges. “I don’t want to do homework. I haven’t had any time to play,” might be a frequent complaint you hear from your seven-year-old. Your child may engage you in power struggles when they have other goals in mind. Their goal – “How can I play longer?” – is typical.

A study by the National Center on Families Learning found that 60% of American families struggle to help children with their homework. 2 More than 25% admit that the reason they struggle is that they are too busy; this is up from just over 20% in 2013. Other reasons parents identified for having trouble with helping with homework were not understanding the subject matter (34%) and pushback from their kids (41%). 3

While getting a regular homework routine going might be a challenge, it can be a joyful experience that promotes valuable skills for school and life success. The steps below include specific, practical strategies along with effective conversation starters to support a homework routine in cooperative ways that avoid a daily struggle.

Why Homework?

Five and six-year-olds will be brand new to the homework experience, and you will have an opportunity to establish positive habits that will stay with them for years to come. Seven, eight, nine, and ten-year-olds will be bringing brand new academic challenges home like reading with competence and learning fractions. Additionally, they may be expected to complete long-term projects. This will take a whole new level of planning and organization. These homework assignments can become a challenge if regular routines are not established. Today, in the short term, establishing effective homework habits will create

• greater cooperation and motivation;
• greater opportunities for connection and enjoyment as you implement your respective roles and feel set up for success;
• trust in each other that you have the competence to complete your responsibilities with practice and care;
• reduced frustrations from a lack of organization, space, or resources; and
• learning about your child’s school curriculum.

Tomorrow, in the long term, homework helps your child

• build skills in collaboration and cooperative goal setting;
• build skills in responsible decision making, hard work, and persistence;
• gains independence, life skills competence, and self-sufficiency; and
• develops positive learning habits that contribute directly to school success.

Five Steps for Creating a Homework Routine

This five-step process helps your family establish a routine for homework. It also builds important skills in your child. The same process can be used to address other parenting issues as well ( learn more about the process ).

These steps are done best when you and your child are not tired or in a rush.

Intentional communication and a healthy parenting relationship support these steps.

Step 1. Get Your Child Thinking by Getting Their Input

You can get your child thinking about establishing a homework routine by asking them open-ended questions. You’ll help prompt your child’s thinking. You’ll also begin to better understand their thoughts, feelings, and challenges related to homework so that you can address them. In gaining input, your child

• has the opportunity to think through the routine and problem solve through any challenges they may encounter ahead of time;
• has a greater stake in anything they’ve designed themselves (and with that sense of ownership, comes a greater responsibility for implementing the routine);
• will have more motivation to work together and cooperate because of their sense of ownership; and
• will be working with you on making informed decisions (understanding the reasons behind those decisions) about a critical aspect of their learning — their homework.
• “How do you want to spend your time after school?”
• “Would you like a snack first?”
• “Do you want to change into play clothes first?”
• “Do you want time to rest or run outside and play?”
• “Considering all of the activities that typically take place after school, when is the best time for you to do homework?”
• Experiment to figure out a plan for homework. Since the homework experience for younger children is new, you’ll want to take a week and try out different times to see what works best with your child’s energy. Your child, for example, may say that they want to get homework done right after school only to find that they’re mentally worn and need a break. So, ask key questions and assign a first trial week. If one way doesn’t work, try out an after-dinner time and ask again: “Does this time work better?” Everyone has different energy cycles and times when they feel better able to focus, so work on discovering that rhythm with your child and you’ll go a long way toward setting them up for success!
• Once you agree upon a time that makes sense for all, your attempts to keep that time sacred and consistent for homework will be important to ensure it becomes a habit and routine. If you are consistent, it can serve as a predictable, non-negotiable process. Your child knows what to expect and when to expect it.
• Take note of the time when your child has said is the best time to do homework. Set a timer to go off at that time. Instead of you calling out, “Time for homework!” which may incite a battle, an inanimate, dispassionate object is alerting them. You can use a kitchen timer outside or inside.
• If your child has decided to do homework right after school, be certain to provide a healthy high protein snack first (peanut butter crackers, cheese stick and apples). You may even consider having this snack ready for the car ride home.
• If you cannot offer a choice in the time of day homework is completed, then find another choice your child can make. For example, you could allow your child to decide what space they use, or what snack they will have to accompany homework completion. Adding some level of choice to the process will prevent power struggles and help your child take ownership.
• a well-lit location (or get a task lamp to light up a preferred spot);
• close proximity to your family’s living space or kitchen (wherever you’ll typically be so that you are never far to offer support); and
• a hard work surface that can get dirty. (Your child may need to color with markers, use glue sticks, cut, and more. Make sure your surface is durable.)
• School supplies: loose leaf paper, crayons, glue sticks, scissors, pencils, pencil sharpener, a children’s dictionary, and any other items you anticipate they might need.
• No clutter. In fact, a disorganized environment can distract from a child’s focus. So eliminate clutter, organize tools, and only have the essentials at hand. Invest in a few supply holders to keep tools neat and ready.
• A binder, bin, or other receptacle designated for school papers that are brought home and stay at home.
• The goal of a homework space is to provide a well-equipped, consistent place for your child to fully focus on the work at hand. In this way, they’ll know what to expect. You won’t have to struggle over frustrations when they can’t find a school tool. And, they’ll learn to take greater responsibility for their learning as they work with you to organize this space.
• Make it fun! Designing a homework spot together can be an enjoyable experience. Allow your child to pick out their own organization bins and school tools. Perhaps they could make a sign with their name on it to designate the space. Or, create a poster with an inspirational saying like, “Good things come from hard work!” Take a little time to label your new supply holders not only with names but also with stickers or drawings to allow your child to personalize them. All this can be motivating to a child.
• Create a family homework rule. Be sure to discuss (at a family dinner, for example) how the family can respect homework time. Consider if you want all siblings to do homework at the same time or not. If you want everyone to do homework at the same time, consider what would need to be in place to make that happen. Either way, agree upon a homework rule that everyone will respect the person who is focused on their work and will be quiet in that area of the house.

Step 2. Teach New Skills by Interactive Modeling

As a parent or someone in a parenting role, learning on which developmental milestones a child is working can help a parent know which tasks might be more difficult. Here are some examples as they relate to homework: 4

• Five-year-olds like to help and follow rules. They typically see only one way of doing things (so if you suggest another, it might be difficult for them to understand and follow). They also may fear making mistakes, so it’s important to send the message that “Everyone makes mistakes, and mistakes are essential to learning.”
• Six-year-olds may be more apt to question your rules and refuse to proceed with the routine. But, they are ambitious and eager to do well, so recognize small steps toward competence.
• Seven-year-olds crave routine and structure, so they may not be able to deal well with a chaotic household distracting from their focus.
• Eight-year-olds are highly social and thrive in cooperative learning groups. This could be a great time to introduce a study partner/friend where buddies complete homework together discussing the issues and supporting one another. (This may not work for every child, so it is important to know your child and their ways of learning and focusing.) Eight-year-olds also may simply enjoy talking about what they are working on with you more than in past years.
• Nine-year-olds are highly competent with fine motor skills but can become easily frustrated. They may need directions that contain one instruction. They require patience and can be hard on themselves.
• Ten-year-olds are growing rapidly so they require more movement. They have a strong sense of right and wrong and awareness of fairness issues. They can feel more competent with homework, though challenging work may trigger anger and/or frustration.

Teaching is different than just telling. Teaching builds basic skills, grows problem-solving abilities, and sets your child up for success. Teaching also involves modeling and practicing the positive behaviors you want to see, promoting skills, and preventing problems.

As a parent or someone in a parenting role, it is easy to be confused about how best to support your child’s homework. Here are some specific ways you can define your role while ensuring your child has full ownership over their learning process.

• “Where in your book did you find this lesson?”
• “Where else could you look to find the answer?”
• “What other ways can you think about your answer?”
• Share your curiosity and interest in the subject, but do not provide an answer.
• Focus on keywords so that they too can learn to spot key words.
• Attempt to read together. Young children who are learning to read may require help reading and understanding directions.
• Use your finger to underscore the text you are reading.
• Ask your child which words are most important when you are talking about a problem.
• Have your child underline or highlight those words in the instructions or in the specific question they are trying to answer so that you have a focusing point. Children need support in figuring out what is most important in making sense out of text of any kind.
• Research together. If you cannot find the source of the problem in your child’s books, then do some online research together. But be certain that you allow your child to drive the process. You might ask, “What should we look up or search for together?” These are the first seeds of strong research skills.
• Teach the essential “brain break.” Breaks do not represent weakness or a lack of persistence. In fact, people’s brains work better if they take frequent breaks.
• Show proactively what a brain break might look like. Pretend play through it. Parent: sit with your pencil and paper and say aloud, “I am really starting to feel frustrated.” Then, move away from your seat and breathe deeply and loudly. Get a drink of water. Walk outside and breathe in the fresh air. Take your child with you to do this alongside you.
• You might ask, “What else makes you feel better and comforted when you are frustrated?” Brainstorm a brief list of spaces, places, things, and actions that offer comfort when frustrated. Leave that list in your school tool homework space. It will serve as an ongoing resource when brain breaks are required.
• It’s a common challenge of homework time for a child to fear making mistakes. Homework is practice, it is intended as a time to try out an answer, get it wrong, and try again. Hang up a sign near your homework spot to remind your child, “Mistakes are part of learning.”
• You do not need to be a subject matter expert EVER! If you find that you are struggling to get the right answer for yourself, take a step back. Realize that you are stealing a learning opportunity away from your child. Ask yourself how you can provide the guidance and support for them to answer the question or solve the problem (even if they get it wrong).

Step 3. Practice to Grow Skills and Develop Habits

Homework practice can take the form of cooperatively completing the task together or trying out a task with you as a coach and ready support. Practice grows vital new brain connections that strengthen (and eventually form habits) each time your child practices.

• Use “Show me…” statements. When a child learns a new ability, they are eager to show it off! Give them that chance. Say: “Show me you know what’s next when our timer goes off.” This can be used when you are in the after school routine and need an alert to move on to homework.
• Do a “brain break” dry run. In the midst of homework one night, maybe at a natural breaking point, play “brain break.” Practice moving away from homework. Get a drink of water. Walk outside and sniff the fresh air. Then, go back and ask, “Do you feel refreshed and ready or do you need a little more time?” If your child responds they need more time, then what would make them feel better? Perhaps a hug on a teddy bear or a couple of runs around the house might do the trick. This practice is super important if you plan to use it as a tool when your child is really upset.
• Recognize effort by using “I notice…” statements. For example, “I noticed how you got to work this afternoon when the timer sounded without me asking. That’s taking responsibility!”
• Proactively remind your child to help them be successful. Often the challenges in a homework routine seem to recur day after day and may be predictable. You might know exactly what they are and when they are going to happen. So, just before they do, remind in a gentle, non-public way. You may whisper in your child’s ear, “Remember what we can do next to figure out the problem? What is it?”

Resist the temptation to nag. Children often need more time to perform tasks that challenge them even if you believe they are simple and don’t require much time. Be sure to wait long enough for your child to show you they are competent. Your waiting could make all the difference in whether they are able to do what you need them to do.

Step 4. Support Your Child’s Development and Success

At this point, you’ve taught your child several new positive learning habits so that they understand how to perform them. You’ve practiced together. Now, you can offer support when it’s needed. Parents naturally offer support as they see their child fumble with a situation in which they need help. This is no different.

• Promote a learning attitude. Show confidence that your child can learn anything with time and practice (because they truly can!). Your comments and reflections will matter greatly in how competent they feel to meet any learning challenge.
• Ask key questions when your child struggles. You could say, “It looks like you feel stuck. Is there another way you could approach the problem?” or “How are you feeling about homework tonight?”
• Coach on communications. You might notice your child struggling and getting stuck even with your support. You might then say, “Seems like you are having trouble figuring this problem out and cannot find the answer in your resources. This would be a good time to ask your teacher about this problem. You might say, ‘Mrs. Johnson, I struggled with this one. Can you help me?’”
• Stay engaged. It can be motivating for a child when a parent does their own paperwork alongside them keeping them company. Working together, after all, is much more enjoyable than working alone.
• Allow for and reflect on real world consequences. If you see a mistake on your child’s worksheet, don’t correct it. You’ll be taking away a valuable learning opportunity. You could leave it alone altogether or ask once, “Do you feel like this is right or are you struggling with it?” If your child confirms it’s the answer they want to give, then allow them the experience of their teacher correcting it. It’s an important learning opportunity. It may open a door to extra support from their teacher.
• Apply logical consequences when needed. Logical consequences should come soon after the negative behavior and need to be provided in a way that maintains a healthy relationship. Rather than punishment, a consequence is about supporting the learning process. First, get your own feelings in check. Not only is this good modeling, when your feelings are in check you are able to provide logical consequences that fit the behavior. Second, invite your child into a discussion about the expectations established in Step 2. Third, if you feel that your child is not holding up their end of the bargain (unless it is a matter of them not knowing how), then apply a logical consequence as a teachable moment.

If you groan that it’s homework time, surely your child will groan too. Become aware of your own reactions to homework. Be sure that the tone and attitude you bring to homework is one of digging in, being curious, and learning.

A research study noted whether mothers’ comments during homework completion were controlling or supporting autonomy and competence. 5 The researchers concluded that those children who brought worries about their ability to perform had a heightened sensitivity to their mothers’ comments. Moms who supported their autonomy – “I know you can do it!” – and demonstrated that they believed in their child’s ability to do the work predicted increased achievement over time. However, those mothers who were more controlling in their comments – “I need to check your work. That’s not right.” – predicted less engagement and lower achievement in their children.

Step 5. Recognize Effort and Quality to Foster Motivation

No matter how old your child is, your praise and encouragement are their sweetest reward.

If your child is working to grow their skills – even in small ways – it will be worth your while to recognize it. Your recognition can go a long way to promoting positive behaviors and helping your child manage their feelings. Your recognition also promotes safe, secure, and nurturing relationships — a foundation for strong communication and a healthy relationship with you as they grow.

You can recognize your child’s efforts with praise, high fives, and hugs. Praise is most effective when you name the specific behavior of which you want to see more. For example, “You put your game away when the timer went off and got out your work. Love seeing that!”

Avoid bribes. A bribe is a promise for a behavior, while praise is special attention after the behavior. While bribes may work in the short term, praise grows lasting motivation for good behavior and effort. For example, instead of saying, “If you get your homework done right after school, I will let you choose the game we play after dinner” (which is a bribe), try recognizing the behavior after. “You got to work on your homework like we practiced. Love seeing that!”

• Recognize and call out when it is going well. It may seem obvious, but it’s easy not to notice when all is moving along smoothly. When children are completing their homework tasks on time, for example, a short, specific call out is all that’s needed. “I noticed you completed your homework today on your own in the time we agreed upon. Yes! Excellent.”
• Recognize small steps along the way. Don’t wait for the big accomplishments – like the entire homework routine to go smoothly – in order to recognize. Remember that your recognition can work as a tool to promote more positive behaviors. Find small ways your child is making an effort and let them know you see them.
• Build celebrations into your routine. For example, “We’ll get our business taken care of first with our homework, and then we’ll run around outside or take a bike ride.” Include hugs as a way to appreciate one another.

Engaging in these five steps is an investment that builds your skills as an effective parent to use on many other issues and builds important skills that will last a lifetime for your child. Throughout this tool, there are opportunities for children to become more self-aware, to deepen their social awareness, to exercise their self-management skills, to work on their relationship skills, and to demonstrate and practice responsible decision making.

[ 1 ] Henderson, A.T., Mapp, K.L., Johnson, V.R., & Davies, D. (2007). Beyond the bake sale: The essential guide to family-school partnerships. NY: The New York Press.

[ 2 ] reid, k. s. (2014). survey finds more parents troubled by their children’s homework . education week, september 19. retrieved on september 25, 2104., [ 3 ] national center for families learning. (2014). annual survey on parents and homework . google consumer surveys, august 12, 2014, to august 22, 2014, based on 1,039 online responses., [ 4 ] wood, c. (2017). yardsticks; child and adolescent development ages 4-14. turners falls, ma: center for responsive schools., [ 5 ] fei-yin ng, f., kenney-benson, g.a., & pomerantz, e.m. (2004). children’s achievement moderates the effects of mothers’ use of control and autonomy support. child development. vol. 75, 3, 764-780., recommended citation: center for health and safety culture. (2020). homework. ages 5-10. retrieved from https://parentingmontana.org..

ParentingMontana.org was supported [in part] by CFDA 93.959 and 93.243 from the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA), and by the Preschool Development Grant Birth through Five Initiative (PDG B-5), Grant Number 90TP0026-01-00, from the Office of Child Care, Administration for Children and Families, U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, and by the Montana State General Fund. The views and opinions contained do not necessarily reflect those of SAMHSA, the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, or the Montana Department of Health and Human Services, and should not be construed as such.

Sign up here  for updates to ParentingMontana.org.

Connect with a Child Care Resource & Referral Agency in your region

Connect with a montana prevention specialist in your region.

Should Kids Get Homework?

Homework gives elementary students a way to practice concepts, but too much can be harmful, experts say.

Getty Images

Effective homework reinforces math, reading, writing or spelling skills, but in a way that's meaningful.

How much homework students should get has long been a source of debate among parents and educators. In recent years, some districts have even implemented no-homework policies, as students juggle sports, music and other activities after school.

Parents of elementary school students, in particular, have argued that after-school hours should be spent with family or playing outside rather than completing assignments. And there is little research to show that homework improves academic achievement for elementary students.

But some experts say there's value in homework, even for younger students. When done well, it can help students practice core concepts and develop study habits and time management skills. The key to effective homework, they say, is keeping assignments related to classroom learning, and tailoring the amount by age: Many experts suggest no homework for kindergartners, and little to none in first and second grade.

Value of Homework

Homework provides a chance to solidify what is being taught in the classroom that day, week or unit. Practice matters, says Janine Bempechat, clinical professor at Boston University 's Wheelock College of Education & Human Development.

"There really is no other domain of human ability where anybody would say you don't need to practice," she adds. "We have children practicing piano and we have children going to sports practice several days a week after school. You name the domain of ability and practice is in there."

Homework is also the place where schools and families most frequently intersect.

"The children are bringing things from the school into the home," says Paula S. Fass, professor emerita of history at the University of California—Berkeley and the author of "The End of American Childhood." "Before the pandemic, (homework) was the only real sense that parents had to what was going on in schools."

Harris Cooper, professor emeritus of psychology and neuroscience at Duke University and author of "The Battle Over Homework," examined more than 60 research studies on homework between 1987 and 2003 and found that — when designed properly — homework can lead to greater student success. Too much, however, is harmful. And homework has a greater positive effect on students in secondary school (grades 7-12) than those in elementary.

"Every child should be doing homework, but the amount and type that they're doing should be appropriate for their developmental level," he says. "For teachers, it's a balancing act. Doing away with homework completely is not in the best interest of children and families. But overburdening families with homework is also not in the child's or a family's best interest."

Negative Homework Assignments

Not all homework for elementary students involves completing a worksheet. Assignments can be fun, says Cooper, like having students visit educational locations, keep statistics on their favorite sports teams, read for pleasure or even help their parents grocery shop. The point is to show students that activities done outside of school can relate to subjects learned in the classroom.

But assignments that are just busy work, that force students to learn new concepts at home, or that are overly time-consuming can be counterproductive, experts say.

Homework that's just busy work.

Effective homework reinforces math, reading, writing or spelling skills, but in a way that's meaningful, experts say. Assignments that look more like busy work – projects or worksheets that don't require teacher feedback and aren't related to topics learned in the classroom – can be frustrating for students and create burdens for families.

"The mental health piece has definitely played a role here over the last couple of years during the COVID-19 pandemic, and the last thing we want to do is frustrate students with busy work or homework that makes no sense," says Dave Steckler, principal of Red Trail Elementary School in Mandan, North Dakota.

Homework on material that kids haven't learned yet.

With the pressure to cover all topics on standardized tests and limited time during the school day, some teachers assign homework that has not yet been taught in the classroom.

Not only does this create stress, but it also causes equity challenges. Some parents speak languages other than English or work several jobs, and they aren't able to help teach their children new concepts.

" It just becomes agony for both parents and the kids to get through this worksheet, and the goal becomes getting to the bottom of (the) worksheet with answers filled in without any understanding of what any of it matters for," says professor Susan R. Goldman, co-director of the Learning Sciences Research Institute at the University of Illinois—Chicago .

Homework that's overly time-consuming.

The standard homework guideline recommended by the National Parent Teacher Association and the National Education Association is the "10-minute rule" – 10 minutes of nightly homework per grade level. A fourth grader, for instance, would receive a total of 40 minutes of homework per night.

But this does not always happen, especially since not every student learns the same. A 2015 study published in the American Journal of Family Therapy found that primary school children actually received three times the recommended amount of homework — and that family stress increased along with the homework load.

Young children can only remain attentive for short periods, so large amounts of homework, especially lengthy projects, can negatively affect students' views on school. Some individual long-term projects – like having to build a replica city, for example – typically become an assignment for parents rather than students, Fass says.

"It's one thing to assign a project like that in which several kids are working on it together," she adds. "In (that) case, the kids do normally work on it. It's another to send it home to the families, where it becomes a burden and doesn't really accomplish very much."

Private vs. Public Schools

Do private schools assign more homework than public schools? There's little research on the issue, but experts say private school parents may be more accepting of homework, seeing it as a sign of academic rigor.

Of course, not all private schools are the same – some focus on college preparation and traditional academics, while others stress alternative approaches to education.

"I think in the academically oriented private schools, there's more support for homework from parents," says Gerald K. LeTendre, chair of educational administration at Pennsylvania State University—University Park . "I don't know if there's any research to show there's more homework, but it's less of a contentious issue."

How to Address Homework Overload

First, assess if the workload takes as long as it appears. Sometimes children may start working on a homework assignment, wander away and come back later, Cooper says.

"Parents don't see it, but they know that their child has started doing their homework four hours ago and still not done it," he adds. "They don't see that there are those four hours where their child was doing lots of other things. So the homework assignment itself actually is not four hours long. It's the way the child is approaching it."

But if homework is becoming stressful or workload is excessive, experts suggest parents first approach the teacher, followed by a school administrator.

"Many times, we can solve a lot of issues by having conversations," Steckler says, including by "sitting down, talking about the amount of homework, and what's appropriate and not appropriate."

Study Tips for High School Students

Tags: K-12 education , students , elementary school , children

2024 Best Colleges

Search for your perfect fit with the U.S. News rankings of colleges and universities.

Home / Expert Articles / Child Behavior Problems / School & Homework

10 Ways to Motivate Your Child to Do Better in School

By debbie pincus, ms lmhc.

How do you motivate a child who doesn’t seem to want to do his school work?

As parents, we are invested in our child’s academic life because we know how important it is for their future. Unfortunately, our kids don’t always seem to share our concern about their future. We know this because they continue to prioritize watching YouTube, gaming, and hanging out with their friends over their school work.

Why aren’t our kids motivated to do well in school? After all, it’s in their self-interest to do well. Why don’t they want to succeed as much as we want them to succeed?

Here’s the problem. School is an aspect of life that requires discipline and work, and kids need to learn to buy into the value of doing well. Your child must own the importance of doing well himself. Motivation can’t be forced. And if you try to force your child to be motivated, it almost always makes things worse.

Nevertheless, there are positive steps that you can take to help your child motivate himself to do better in school. Most of these steps involve setting up a structure to enable him to have better discipline and follow-through. This structure improves your child’s chance of success, and the taste of success is often what drives motivation.

In my work with parents and kids over the years, I have found the following 10 tips to help put your child in the best position to succeed and be motivated in school.

1. Stay Positive

Keep a relationship with your child that is open, respectful, and positive. Remind yourself that you and your child are on the same team. This will allow you to be influential, which is your most important parenting tool.

Punishing, preaching, and threatening will get you nowhere and will be detrimental to your relationship and their motivation. Your feelings of anxiety, frustration, and fear are normal and understandable. But reacting to your kids out of these emotions is ineffective and makes things worse.

Remember, your child is not behaving this way on purpose to make your life miserable. When you feel yourself getting worked up, try saying to yourself, “My child is just not there yet.”

And remind yourself that your job is to help him learn how to be responsible. If you get negative and make this a moral issue, then your child might become defiant, reacting to you instead of thinking through things himself.

2. Incorporate the “When You” Rule

One of life’s lessons is that we get paid after we do the work. So start saying things like:

“When you finish studying, you are welcome to go to your friend’s house.”

“When your homework is completed, we can discuss watching that movie you wanted to see on Netflix.”

Enforce this rule and stick to it. If your child does not yet have the necessary discipline, this will help to create it.

Indeed, by enforcing the “when you” rule, you are helping her learn how to do what her brain is not yet equipped to do, which is to be disciplined and to delay gratification.

3. Create Structure for Your Child

If your child is not studying and his grades are dropping, you have a right to get involved, whether he wants you there or not. Again, you’re not there to do the work for him. Instead, you are there to help set up the structure that he cannot create for himself.

The structure might include scheduled study times, having the computer out in a public place in your home, and saying, “No video games or electronics until after your homework is done.”

You might decide that he must devote a certain amount of hours to study time. During this time, no electronics or other distractions are allowed. You might make the rule that even if he finishes all his homework, he must complete study time by reviewing, reading, or editing.

Some kids do better listening to music while they study, and that’s okay. But keep in mind that this can be tricky because their music is usually integrated with their phones. This means YouTube, Twitter, Reddit, and instant messaging will all be at their fingertips.

If you can’t effectively keep them off those apps, then no phone and no music until their work is done. Just say:

“You can listen to music when you finish your homework.”

Think of it this way: schools don’t allow phones in class, and neither should you.

Understand that this structure is not a punishment. Rather, it is a way to help him to develop a good work ethic and to focus on his school subjects.

4. Meet With the Teacher

If your child’s grades and work habits are not up to par, you can set up a plan by sitting down with him and his teachers.

Have your child check with his teacher each day before coming home to ensure that he has all his homework assignments.

Also, you can ask him each morning to ensure that he brings his homework back to school. For me, nothing was more frustrating than my son doing his homework but then forgetting to bring it to school.

Once your child gets better at managing his time, completing his work, and getting organized, then it’s time for you to back off. Let him do it on his own. Only step in if he is consistently having a problem.

5. Identify a Study Spot

Your child may need a quiet location away from brothers and sisters to study. Or she may do better in a room near others. You can help her experiment, but once you find what works best, keep her in that location.

To keep your child focused, you may need to sit with her while she does her homework. You can read a book or newspaper while she works. At a minimum, be nearby to help ensure that she stays on track.

It’s okay to help her with her homework if she is stuck, but don’t do her work for her. For example, it’s okay to review her work and ask her if a certain paragraph makes sense to her. But it’s not okay to write every sentence or work on every math problem with her. Give just enough help to get her over the hump. Remember, learning how to struggle through difficult material is one of the skills your child needs to learn.

6. Break Assignments Into Manageable Pieces

Decide together whether you need to help him break down his assignments into smaller pieces and organize on a calendar what he should get done each day.

You can get him a big wall calendar or a whiteboard. It could be electronic if that is preferable, but I prefer written tools because electronics can be distracting.

7. Be Firm and Consistent with Homework Rules

You want to be positive and helpful to your child. At the same time, though, you have to be firm. You have to consistently enforce the rules you establish.

Being firm and consistent sends the message to your child that you know he can succeed.

Being firm also means that you enforce the rules with effective consequences. If he doesn’t follow the rules you set up, apply the consequences. And don’t try to shield him from the natural consequences of not doing his work, even if that means bad or failing grades.

In being firm, stay positive. For every negative interaction with your child, try to create ten positive ones. Try to put the focus on supporting and encouraging him instead of worrying and nagging.

And don’t take his performance personally. When you start to believe his grades are a reflection of you or your parenting, then you will be on his case, and it will make things worse.

8. Be Aware of His Anxiety Level

Recognize that much of your child’s lack of motivation (or what looks like irresponsibility) might be his anxiety or shame about academics and schoolwork. Kids may not be able to explain all of this to you because it’s not always on a conscious level for them.

Anxiety can be misinterpreted as a lousy attitude, lack of motivation, and irresponsibility. Often, the cover-up for these vulnerable emotions can take the form of acting out, shutting down, avoidance, or defiance.

While a little anxiety can motivate, too much blocks your child’s ability to think and to have access to the part of the brain that helps him with motivation.

Keep your emotions in check by recognizing that it may be your child’s anxiety at play rather than his laziness. Calmly help to give him a better structure to get his work done, and it will help reduce his anxiety.

And remember that what is happening now may look very different as your child matures and develops.

9. Don’t Over-Function For Your Child

It’s nerve-wracking and frustrating to see your child struggle and not meet his potential. You may feel that your child’s lack of motivation is a poor reflection on your parenting. In response, you react and shift into overdrive to get your child to succeed so that your feelings of shame, embarrassment, failure, or fear go away.

In the process, you may be tempted to over-function by helping to complete his work for him. But don’t do it. Resist the temptation. The more you over-function for your child, the more he will react to your anxiety, which causes things to go further and further downhill. Just set up the structure to help him succeed, but let him do the work and bear the consequences, good or bad.

Be your child’s coach. Set the strategy and give direction, but stay on the sidelines and let your child play the game—Root for him to win and praise him when he does. But don’t be afraid to let him fail. It’s all part of growing up and learning to take responsibility.

10. Don’t Obsess About the Future

When your child seems to have no interest in his life, it’s easy to start fast-forwarding into the future. When he acts like he doesn’t care about anything except video games and his friends, you worry that he won’t be successful or even function on his own. This heightens your anxiety and fear.

But none of us have a crystal ball or can see into the future. Focusing on the negative things your child is doing will only bring the spotlight on them and may set you both up for a power struggle. Instead, focus on your child’s positive traits and help him work on those in the present.

Is he outgoing? Helpful? A good cook? Good with cars or electronics? Focus on all the things that go into a developed, successful person, not just academics and grades. Help your child develop in social, creative, and emotional ways. Remember to always keep the big picture in mind.

For all of these tips, start from where your child is. What I mean is that, in many cases, your child may have a long way to go, and you don’t want to overwhelm him by trying to work on too many issues at once.

Expect that your child won’t like the structure at first, but he will get used to it. Be patient. Don’t expect improvement overnight, but don’t underestimate your child either. Be confident that he will come around and will improve with the structures you have put in place.

Related content: Sinking Fast at School: How to Help Your Child Stay Afloat “My Child Refuses to Do Homework” — How to Stop the Nightly Struggle Over School Work

About Debbie Pincus, MS LMHC

For more than 25 years, Debbie has offered compassionate and effective therapy and coaching, helping individuals, couples and parents to heal themselves and their relationships. Debbie is the creator of the Calm Parent AM & PM™ program and is also the author of numerous books for young people on interpersonal relations.

You must log in to leave a comment. Don't have an account? Create one for free!

Mom of Senior Although these comments are great, currently all homework is online for my highschool senior. during the pandemic, all of his school was online, and now, he's in a brick and mortor school for the first time since 9th grade. i think encouraging kids to seek friends at this point is More helpful, but it has to be on his terms. i haven't heard of many other parents with kids in this situation, but i do believe we aren't the only ones at a new school for senior year. the other situation is how much my senior dislikes school. he hates the entire structure of the school day, and feels there's no opportunity to truly learn when forced to cram everything into a 45 minute class period. we struggle often, with all of this.

BW RC I agree with you.

Parents most definitely need to stay involved in making sure their kids are on track academically. Here are some tips, parent to parent, from someone who has raised kids who have had success in school:

(1) Understand each of your child's capabilities and set expectations at home. Keep in mind that every child is different and outcomes will vary. The one commonality is that every child needs to achieve to the best of his/her own ability. Establishing work ethic is key in the early academic years.

(2) Help your child with organizational tools. Many kids struggle early on because they miss due dates or don't know how to manage their time because of poor organization. Buy them agendas to write down assignments and talk to them at the beginning of each week about upcoming tests and projects.

(3) Create a quiet, stress-free environment at home where kids can focus without distraction.

(4) Self esteem and confidence are extremely important. Always try to focus on positive reinforcement rather than taking a punitive approach. Verbally acknowledge improvements, even if the grade isn't where you would like it to be. If a child scores a low C on a test one week, and brings it up to a mid C the next, focus on the improvement, not on the disappointment that the grade isn't an A.

(5) Teach your child to communicate directly with his/her teachers and take advantage of study halls and other opportunities to seek instruction. Only get involved directly if all other avenues have been exhausted.

RC These suggestions are great for those with children, who have little defiance and will react to consequences, by changing their behavior. But, for our kid, nothing seems to work, either positive or negative. Unfortunately, I find this information much too basic and general. We’ve tried all of this and nothing More has stuck. The only suggestion I can see as potentially beneficial is number nine. Focus on what the kid is good at and hope for the best. But, until kids can stop lying to everyone, especially themselves, it’s all for nothing...

Responses to questions posted on EmpoweringParents.com are not intended to replace qualified medical or mental health assessments. We cannot diagnose disorders or offer recommendations on which treatment plan is best for your family. Please seek the support of local resources as needed. If you need immediate assistance, or if you and your family are in crisis, please contact a qualified mental health provider in your area, or contact your statewide crisis hotline.

We value your opinions and encourage you to add your comments to this discussion. We ask that you refrain from discussing topics of a political or religious nature. Unfortunately, it's not possible for us to respond to every question posted on our website.

• 1. The Homework Battle: How to Get Children to Do Homework
• 2. "My Child Refuses to Do Homework" — How to Stop the Nightly Struggle Over Schoolwork
• 3. What to Do When Your Child or Teen is Suspended or Expelled From School
• 4. Acting Out in School: When Your Child is the Class Troublemaker
• 5. Young Kids in School: Help for the Top 4 Behavior Problems
• 140,000+ Subscribers Subscribe
• 50,000+ Fans Follow
• 10,000+ Followers Follow
• 6,000+ Followers Follow

Disrespect... defiance... backtalk... lack of motivation...

Frustrated and exhausted by your child's behavior?

Get your FREE Personal Parenting Plan today.

Does your child exhibit angry outbursts , such as tantrums, lashing out, punching walls, and throwing things?

Would you like to learn about how to use consequences more effectively?

Backtalk... complaints... arguments... attitude... just plain ignoring you

Do you struggle with disrespect or verbal abuse from your child?

Has your child been diagnosed with oppositional defiant disorder (ODD)?

Or does your child exhibit a consistent and severe pattern of anger, irritability, arguing, defiance, and vindictiveness toward you or other authority figures?

Intimidation... aggression... physical abuse and violence ...

Are you concerned that your child may physically hurt you or others?

You must select at least one category to create your Personal Parenting Plan:

We're just about finished! Create a secure account with Empowering Parents to access your Personal Parenting Plan.

Ten Homework Motivation Strategies for Children and Teens

Use these 10 strategies to end the homework wars..

Posted September 6, 2015 | Reviewed by Ekua Hagan

When it comes to homework, parents get burnt out hearing these hollow and suspicious words: "I did it at school," "They didn't give homework today," "It hardly counts for my grade," "My teacher never looks at my homework anyway," "That assignment was optional." As parents, hearing these words is enough to drive you crazy.

As I write in my book, 10 Days to a Less Defiant Child , parents must not let their emotions get the best of them when their kids are not getting homework done. The strategies below are for helping your child or teen get unstuck:

• Nix the nagging! Pestering creates an adversarial, shaming dynamic that backfires. Instead, try my Calm, Firm, and Non-Controlling approach. Gently empower your child or teen by supportively saying, "I see that you are frustrated. Let's think of ways to help you get back on track with your homework/schoolwork."
• Encourage effort over perfection. Be mindful that kids tend to get intimidated when they have a hard time understanding material. They may get into negative self-talk like, "I can't do this." Even if they're truly thinking this way, parents may instead hear comments like, "I hate this." or "This is stupid." Remind your child or teen that doing his best effort is better than not doing it at all.
• Prioritize. Coach and encourage that the order that homework is done based on urgency, complexity, and workload. At the same time, realize that some students do better by starting with easier tasks and that this can help spark them to tackle more demanding assignments.
• Break it down. Reinforce breaking up homework time into manageable chunks and encourage taking regular breaks. Encourage moving around and walking away for a bit. Remind that an apple really does provide the same effect, and is healthier than an energy drink.
• Think "15 minutes of pain." Have the student set a timer for only 15 minutes. Keep it lighthearted and explain that even if it "hurts" doing the work, she can stop after 15 minutes. Like most things in life, once we push ourselves and get going, it's not so bad.
• Don't be consequence ravenous. Imposing consequences for homework not being done can backfire with defiant behavior. If you use consequences, don't present them with yelling. Keep them reasonable and ask the student to help you be able to move towards rewards (don't go overboard) and minimize consequences. Remember that real, natural consequences are the best motivators.
• Encourage connection. Encourage the student to make or re-establish a connection with his teacher. I have seen hundreds of kids "shoot themselves in the foot" with incomplete homework if they don't have a decent relationship with their teacher.
• Change up the homework/study surroundings. Try putting an inspirational poster by the desk, moving to a different room, or silencing the cell phone. New changes can create more changes.
• Use those study halls. Encourage the use of them as much as possible. Some kids lose sight of that more done at school, means less to do at home.
• Allow for some fun. Notice if your student is racing through the homework just to have fun. Fun time like, TV, phone time, or surfing the web, is welcome, but make sure you put limits on it.

Jeffrey Bernstein, Ph.D. , is a psychologist and the author of seven books, including 10 Days to a Less Defiant Child.

• Find a Therapist
• Find a Treatment Center
• Find a Psychiatrist
• Find a Support Group
• Find Teletherapy
• United States
• Brooklyn, NY
• Chicago, IL
• Houston, TX
• Los Angeles, CA
• New York, NY
• Portland, OR
• San Diego, CA
• San Francisco, CA
• Seattle, WA
• Washington, DC
• Asperger's
• Bipolar Disorder
• Chronic Pain
• Eating Disorders
• Passive Aggression
• Personality
• Goal Setting
• Positive Psychology
• Stopping Smoking
• Low Sexual Desire
• Relationships
• Child Development
• Therapy Center NEW
• Diagnosis Dictionary
• Types of Therapy

Understanding what emotional intelligence looks like and the steps needed to improve it could light a path to a more emotionally adept world.

• Coronavirus Disease 2019
• Affective Forecasting
• Neuroscience

Top Stories

• Ask the Professor

What is the appropriate age for children to start getting homework?

Debbie leekeenan, director of the eliot-pearson children’s school and a lecturer in the department of child development, fills us in.

“In recent times, there seems to be more homework, especially for our youngest students,” says Debbie LeeKeenan. Photo: iStock

Homework is such an established part of education, it’s hard to believe it’s not all beneficial. But recent studies have found almost no correlation between homework and long-term achievement in elementary school, and only a moderate correlation in middle school.

Yet in recent times, there seems to be more homework, especially for our youngest students. That seems to have led to a backlash. Often-cited negative effects include children’s frustration and exhaustion, lack of time for other activities and downtime and a loss of interest in learning. Many parents lament that homework is a constant source of tension at home.

What is the purpose of homework? The best homework assignments are meaningful and authentic and are connected to classroom learning. Homework can be used to teach time management and organization, to broaden experiences and to reinforce classroom skills. Parents are not expected to play the role of the teacher or introduce new skills.

Homework can certainly benefit students. It may encourage:

Practice and review —such as reading 15 minutes each night, studying spelling words or number facts

Pre-learning —a way to introduce a new topic; for example, if the class will be studying ants, having students write questions they have about ants

Processing —if learning about moon phases in class, students would observe the moon for several nights and draw what they see and identify the phases

Checking for understanding —keeping a journal about science experiments done in class, for instance

How much homework is too much? The idea that “less is more” rules here. According to the National Education Association, guidelines are no more than 10 minutes per grade level per night (that’s 10 minutes total for a first-grader, 30 minutes for a third-grader). Some students do their homework on their own, and some parents help their children. Many teachers now give homework once a week that is due the following week to allow more flexibility and accommodate a range of student and family schedules.

Successful homework experiences have strong home-school partnerships, where the purpose of homework is clearly defined by the teacher and communicated with the student and family. When in doubt, ask!

Do you have a question for Ask the Professor? Send it to Tufts Journal editor Taylor McNeil .

Posted September 01, 2010

Another fine mess.

Fletcher professor exposes the limits of financial models and calls for a return to old-fashioned banking values

The Right Whey

Molly Pindell, N05, took her own path to making scrumptious, sustainable goat cheese

New Accolade for the Dental School

William J. Gies Award recognizes leadership in teaching, research, community service and diversity

Combating a Brand-New Superbug

Biomedical researchers launch a three-front assault on a potentially lethal bacterium

Pow! Women Pop Artists Get Their Day

SLIDESHOW: New Tufts Art Gallery exhibition highlights works hidden in the shadows for decades

From The Archives

The spark of revolt, february 16, 2011, when health care is lost in translation, record applications for fall, january 31, 2011, dental force, january 18, 2011, rough and ready vaccine, people notes, accomplishments from the tufts community.

Catch up with events at Tufts

Send us your comments and story ideas

Keep up with our news via RSS

© Copyright 2011 Tufts University

• Getting Pregnant
• Registry Builder
• Baby Products
• Birth Clubs
• See all in Community
• Ovulation Calculator
• How To Get Pregnant
• How To Get Pregnant Fast
• Ovulation Discharge
• Implantation Bleeding
• Ovulation Symptoms
• Pregnancy Symptoms
• Am I Pregnant?
• Pregnancy Tests
• See all in Getting Pregnant
• Due Date Calculator
• Pregnancy Week by Week
• Pregnant Sex
• Weight Gain Tracker
• Signs of Labor
• Morning Sickness
• COVID Vaccine and Pregnancy
• Fetal Weight Chart
• Fetal Development
• Pregnancy Discharge
• Find Out Baby Gender
• Chinese Gender Predictor
• See all in Pregnancy
• Baby Name Generator
• Top Baby Names 2023
• Top Baby Names 2024
• How to Pick a Baby Name
• Most Popular Baby Names
• Baby Names by Letter
• Gender Neutral Names
• Unique Boy Names
• Unique Girl Names
• Top baby names by year
• See all in Baby Names
• Baby Development
• Baby Feeding Guide
• Newborn Sleep
• When Babies Roll Over
• First-Year Baby Costs Calculator
• Postpartum Health
• Baby Poop Chart
• See all in Baby
• Average Weight & Height
• Autism Signs
• Child Growth Chart
• Night Terrors
• Moving from Crib to Bed
• Toddler Feeding Guide
• Potty Training
• Bathing and Grooming
• See all in Toddler
• Height Predictor
• Potty Training: Boys
• Potty training: Girls
• How Much Sleep? (Ages 3+)
• Ready for Preschool?
• Thumb-Sucking
• Gross Motor Skills
• Napping (Ages 2 to 3)
• See all in Child
• Photos: Rashes & Skin Conditions
• Symptom Checker
• Vaccine Scheduler
• Reducing a Fever
• Acetaminophen Dosage Chart
• Constipation in Babies
• Ear Infection Symptoms
• Head Lice 101
• See all in Health
• Second Pregnancy
• Daycare Costs
• Family Finance
• Stay-At-Home Parents
• Breastfeeding Positions
• See all in Family
• Baby Sleep Training
• Preparing For Baby
• My Custom Checklist
• My Registries
• Take the Quiz
• Best Baby Products
• Best Breast Pump
• Best Convertible Car Seat
• Best Infant Car Seat
• Best Baby Bottle
• Best Baby Monitor
• Best Stroller
• Best Diapers
• Best Baby Carrier
• Best Diaper Bag
• Best Highchair
• See all in Baby Products
• Why Pregnant Belly Feels Tight
• Early Signs of Twins
• Teas During Pregnancy
• Baby Head Circumference Chart
• How Many Months Pregnant Am I
• What is a Rainbow Baby
• Braxton Hicks Contractions
• HCG Levels By Week
• When to Take a Pregnancy Test
• Am I Pregnant
• Why is Poop Green
• Can Pregnant Women Eat Shrimp
• Insemination
• UTI During Pregnancy
• Vitamin D Drops
• Best Baby Forumla
• Postpartum Depression
• Low Progesterone During Pregnancy
• Baby Shower
• Baby Shower Games

Your 6-year-old: Milestones and development

Your 6-year-old is a big guy, but he's still little, too. Be sensitive when he messes up, and if he's developed a bad habit, keep in mind that it's his way of coping with stress. Stay out of power struggles by giving him a choice when you can and being firm when you can't. Provide him with structure, a good place to do his homework, and plenty of healthy food. Help him learn to ride his bike, and teach him some safety rules about riding, too. Time to stock up on payouts from the tooth fairy!

Welcome to 6

Little big kid, bedtime battles, family night, eye problems, bike riding lesson, creating a library, tooth fairy, your social butterfly, cleaning up, picky eaters, mom's interests, handling accidents, power plays, soothing routines, homework habits, extended play, asking questions, staying hydrated, music appreciation.

Now We Are Six is a book of children's poetry by A.A. Milne, the creator of Winnie the Pooh. The title alone makes it a fun book to have on your child's shelf. But this kind of book illustrates some other interesting points about 6-year-olds:

• Sixes love poems because of the word play and repetition.
• They also enjoy nonsense words and onomatopoeia (words that sound like the thing they describe, such as "hiss" or "buzz").
• Kids this age are working to understand more about what "big people" do - discoveries that make them feel both confident and confused. The poems reflect a child's increasingly complex world.
• Sixes have vivid imaginations . The characters in such poems include knights, teddy bears, and all kinds of fanciful creatures and situations. The familiar inhabitants of the Hundred Acre Wood are also here. Children this age cling to the comfortingly familiar as well as looking eagerly to new things.
• Six-year-olds still love being read to , even as they begin to master books all on their own.

Strive to find a balance between thinking of your child as a "big kid" (which he is) and a "little one" (which he also still is, in many ways). Grant him more responsibility to make choices, get himself dressed, and the like.

At the same time, recognize that he's not mature enough yet to be a master at things like self-discipline and self-control. He's still learning the ropes, and he will slip up.

Even once-reliable sleepers sometimes have trouble going to bed and staying there. All the anxieties of the day can surface the minute your child's head hits the pillow. Should she go to the sleepover even if she's scared to? What will her brother do when he finds out she lost his baseball? Couple this anxiety with her growing body and busy day.

If your child is resisting bedtime, ask her why it's become a problem. She may identify another reason: Maybe she's not tired or is afraid of the dark. More physical activity, cutting out caffeine, or soothing her fears may help.

Most kids still respond well to a strict bedtime routine . Let your child have some control over the process of shaping it. Curb screen time, computer play, and vigorous activity an hour or so before bedtime as these things tend to jazz kids up instead of calm them down.

Your child may prefer being read to after a bath, or just snuggling to chat. A talk is a great way to catch up and the perfect time for her to unburden herself of those worries that may be keeping her awake.

Looking for more family time? Some families hold a weekly Family Night where outside engagements are verboten. Others hold regular pizza-and-movie dinners.

Or you might consider the modern twist: The Unplugged Night, where computers, tablets, phones, and all manner of electronic gizmos are shut off for a fixed amount of time while you all play board games or take a family walk.

Often the early school years are when vision problems first surface. Doctors screen for vision health during pre-school checkups. Teachers also tend to notice when their students have difficulty seeing the board or participating in class activities.

Among the things to watch out for:

• Complaining about being able to read signs or other words at distances
• A lack of interest in reading
• Holding a book very close to the nose
• Lots of eye rubbing
• Chronic eye tearing (which can indicate a blocked duct)
• Abnormal eye alignment (such as a wandering eye or crossed eyes )
• Sensitivity to light

An eye exam will check both your child's visual acuity and general eye health. Nearsightedness (myopia) is the most common vision problem for kids of school age. Fortunately, today's glasses are sturdy and, because they're not actually made of glass, less likely to break than specs of a generation ago. Contact lenses aren't advised until adolescence.

A tip for teaching a child to ride a bike : Hold on to his shoulders rather than the seat as you run alongside. This allows him to correct his balance, not you.

Note that some kids pick riding up in a jiffy; others will need patience and lots of practice. Try to curb your own frustration if your child takes a while to catch on. You'll only make him feel worse.

As your child grows more confident about bike riding, be sure you've gone over basic safety rules with him.

• Wear a helmet each and every ride.
• Stick to the sidewalks, not the street.
• Stop at each corner to look both ways before crossing.
• Watch the terrain, because piles of wet leaves or sand, dirt, and pebbles can be hazards that lead to wipeouts.
• Keep both hands on the handlebars. And never mind that "Look Ma, no hands!" business!

What books should be in a good first library? Here are some guidelines:

• Foremost, look for books your child can read comfortably. The general rule: Kids should be able to read a page with no more than five errors.
• Simple readers that repeat words and phrases or that have lots of rhyming words and predictable plots all build confidence. (Example: Dr. Seuss's Beginner Books series.)
• Consider your child's interests. Choose tales that relate to experiences in her life, like going to the dentist or making the soccer team. If she likes a certain author or illustrator, look for more titles by that person.
• Aim for variety. Don't forget poetry and nonfiction titles.
• Include some books with only illustrations. As your child looks at the pictures and tells the story in her own words, she builds storytelling skills. She's also learning that pictures provide clues to what the story is about, a skill that will help her figure out unfamiliar words in books with print.
• Pick up a few books that are beyond her reading ability, too. These are for you to read aloud together. Her auditory comprehension (understanding what she hears) is still way ahead of her reading comprehension (understanding what she reads). Being read to expands a child's vocabulary.

Paging the tooth fairy! While some children begin to lose teeth as early as 4 or 5, age 6 is the average age for the first tooth to come out. Think about how you will commemorate this big event. Will your child put the tooth under her pillow and hope the tooth fairy will exchange it for cash? If so, how much?

Some families wrap the tooth in tissue, while others use a fancy box. Given that your child has a mouthful to lose in the coming years, pick a routine you'll be happy to repeat. (Giving a big gift for each lost tooth, for example, can add up.)

Six-year-olds become quite social in their play, drawing friends into their dramas and concocting more elaborate story lines. They're more creative about finding and using props around the house; for example, using blankets to build forts and towels to make capes. It's a good idea to provide lots of prop possibilities and be generous about sharing household items when you can.

An interest in rules makes its way into playtime, too. Kid this age love to be the director. "Run into the room and say, 'Boo!'" they may order a friend. Often kids will take turns directing the play. But if you have two or more assertive types, the bossiness can lead to fights. Let them try to hash it out themselves, but be prepared to step in to help them resolve serious conflicts.

Bonus: How to help your child make friends

It seems to be a modern maxim that the bigger kids get, somehow the messier the house becomes. A few little tricks can help you from getting dragged down by clutter, which organizational experts know is a major stressor to busy parents. For example:

• Try the "ten-minute" rule. Set a timer and spend just ten minutes whittling away the clutter you see. Then stop. This keeps the job from becoming overwhelming but yields visible results.
• Teach your child to clean up one game or play zone before embarking on a new one.
• Hang some pegs inside a closet or just inside a doorway that your child can reach. It can be easier for little hands to hang a jacket on a peg than a hanger.

Handling picky eater issues requires the same matter-of-fact, low-pressure strategy that's effective for other behavioral challenges like power struggles and defiance. No arguing, no raised voices. Put the food on the table - healthy options , of course - without dwelling on it.

Try to have at least one thing you think your child will eat, and then let her choose what, and how much, to eat. If it's only bread, so be it. Your child won't starve or die of malnutrition. The goal is to avoid introducing a lot of emotion surrounding food.

There's also a legitimate scientific reason for kids' dietary fussiness. They have more taste buds than we do (taste buds die as we age), so flavors are more intense. That may be why your child turns up her nose at spicy flavors and vegetables like broccoli. (And some people – supertasters – have more sensitive taste buds than others.)

Try serving veggies steamed or cooked with a little sauce or butter. Sweeter options like red peppers, sweet potatoes, and carrots may be more popular than chard or broccoli. Know, too, that kids who eat with their families instead of alone have been shown to eat more healthfully.

Feeling like you have no time for your own interests? Try this exercise: Make a list of 10 things you love to do and work your way through the list.

Look for patterns among the items: Crafts? Reading? Sports? Pick one activity in one of your top categories and decide you'll spend time at it this month. Read a best-selling novel? Take a tai chi class? A baby step of just couple of hours a month is a small time commitment - but a big step toward reclaiming a bit of your old self.

Misdeeds deserve consequences, right? But in order to hand down a suitable consequence, you need to understand why your child misbehaves. Did she do it on purpose or was it an accident? Does she know the difference?

At 6, your child is learning the difference between accidental and intentional behaviors. Most children don't plot to do wrong. Baseballs sail off course and through windows; pants get ripped; things happen.

Yes, you may have told your child thousands of times to throw the ball away from the house. But kids this age are impulsive and have trouble visualizing future sequences of events; they often can't see what effect their actions will have until something bad happens.

In the event of an accident, grit your teeth and try to stay calm. Talk about the implications of her behavior. Try to involve your child in an appropriate remedy: helping to clean up what was broken, for example.

But sometimes, kids know exactly what they're doing wrong. Kids intentionally act out when they're angry, frustrated, tired, or feel under pressure. Put yourself in her place. She has so little control over her life. She's bound to go over the line occasionally as she tries to assert herself.

While you can't let her get away with bad behavior, be sensitive. You may need to deal with the underlying issue by making sure she gets more rest or role-playing other things she can do to manage her anger .

Bonus: Your top 10 discipline dilemmas - solved

All of this social pressure can wear on your child. Sometimes she'll need to shut out the world and play alone, avoiding the stress of managing peer relationships. Balance playdates with plenty of private time.

Getting snared in a power struggle with a 6-year-old can be tough to avoid. He wants control, and he'll fight for it valiantly. Engaging in these tussles with your child is a losing proposition, though. He'll continue to defy, dawdle, ignore, argue - whatever it takes to grab back some control. The more you insist and get upset, the more power he feels. He now knows just what to do to get a rise out of you.

The trick is to give your child power without surrendering yours. That means choosing your battles. Let him make choices over things appropriate for his age - what to wear, what friend to have over. Give him options whenever you can. "Would you like turkey or ham for dinner?"

And when he truly has no choice, be firm and in control. "You must wear your helmet." Don't debate, and give swift, appropriate consequences if he disobeys or argues with you. "You wear it, or you won't ride your bike the rest of the day."

Structure makes children feel safe. They have something to hold onto amid all the anxiety and know what to expect. "When I get home, I know I'll have a snack, do my homework, and then walk the dog."

You'll also notice how much less fighting there is if you stick with the routines. Kids will understand what needs to get done and when. Enough said. And they feel proud when they pack their own backpacks and finish their chores.

That's not to say you have to be a zealot. There are times - like birthdays or meteor showers - when it's okay to veer off schedule and get to bed a tad late.

If kids catch on to routines now and learn good habits, they can handle larger changes down the road. Let's face it, if they can't brush their teeth and do their homework now, how will they ever pay the bills and get to work on time when they grow up?

Now that your child is entering the homework years, it's a good time to plan how to handle it. Set up a place for your child to work. Many kids do well with a desk or table in their bedroom, but some younger kids prefer to do the work near a parent - maybe at the kitchen table. Have your child do his assignments at a consistent time, such as right after school or right after dinner.

Should you help? Be available to answer questions, but most teachers feel it's best if you don't give answers or actually do the work. The point isn't that the work gets finished correctly but that your child understands the underlying concepts.

Hair twisting, nail biting , nose picking , and shirt gnawing are just a few of the annoying habits 6-year-olds develop. Your child isn't out to irk you. Such habits are a way of coping with stress . Nagging to stop is actually counterproductive. It only draws negative attention to the habit, making your child more nervous and attached to it.

Instead, talk about it in a more casual way. Identify the habit and offer rational reasons for stopping, ones that are clear and understandable to a 6-year-old. "Picking your nails can give you an infection that could hurt." Or "You've been growing out your hair for a long time now. But if you keep chewing on it, we may have to cut it because it's not a polite thing to do."

Enlist your child's help in coming up with ways to stop. Suggest a secret wink or hand motion to signal him when he's chewing on his shirt, for example. Offer positive reinforcement: If he can keep his shirt out of his mouth for a month, you'll buy him that sports jersey he's been begging for.

Most of these unpleasant habits disappear as kids get older and learn other ways to handle anxiety. Peer pressure will help, too. Not too many kids let their classmates get away with picking their noses.

Your child's longer attention span allows him to extend a play theme over a few days or across multiple playdates now. Try to set aside a place in your house for your child to leave out things he's working on, such as art projects, forts or playhouses, or block cities.

Do you find yourself reading Wikipedia to your increasingly curious child, fielding questions about tough topics like whether God exists or why some people are fat? Your child is not only curious about abstract issues, she can now articulate such thoughts better.

When you feel put on the spot, it's okay to stall for time, so long as you do follow-up: "That's a good question. We're almost to school now, but let's talk about it more when you come home." Never get upset at a child for raising any topic. She needs to know she can come to you with anything.

Keep explanations simple. While 6-year-olds can ask abstract questions, they can't understand abstract answers. They're still literal, concrete thinkers for the most part.

Use their questions as a springboard for some of those difficult topics you'll have to deal with eventually anyway. For example, questions about why those people outside the shelter always look so dirty can lead to a meaningful conversation - at his level - about people who may not have as much as he does.

Do be careful about relating these conversations to other adults in your child's presence, no matter how poignant or funny they are. You don't want to make him feel self-conscious or silly for coming to you. Kids want to be taken seriously.

Many kids don't drink enough water during the day. The Institute of Medicine recommends that children 4 to 8 years old drink 7 cups of water per day. To encourage staying hydrated, get your child a water bottle, such as a sports bottle or one made for hiking. (Discount stores offer many types decorated with popular characters or sports teams.)

Put his name on it and let him carry it with him to school and around the house. (Be sure to wash it every day.) Doing the same yourself can help set a good example. Bonus: Your child gets in the habit of swigging plain H2O rather than soda or juice.

The average 6-year-old is about 45 inches tall and weighs approximately 45 pounds. Your child will double that weight by the time he reaches adolescence and grow to five feet tall or more!

Your child's doctor tracks this growth, of course, but you can help your child develop in a healthy way by serving nutritious food and making sure he gets lots of exercise. Two kinds of measurements to bear in mind: height-weight percentiles and BMI .

If the doctor tells you that your 6-year-old son is in the 75th percentile for weight, for example, that means 75 percent of the boys his age in the United States weigh the same or less than your child and 25 percent weigh more.

BMI, or body-mass index, is a calculation based on the relationship between height and weight and it's often used to help determine whether a person is underweight or overweight . A different chart is used for children than adults.

Your child's feet are growing, too. Although it's tempting to buy the most inexpensive shoes you can find because they are outgrown so quickly, remember that your child depends on secure footwear for all that running and playing he should be doing at this age.

Be sure that shoes fit well, and if they have laces or straps, fasten them securely on your child's feet. Every child needs a good pair of tennis shoes. Plastic croc-style shoes or flip-flops won't allow him to run well.

Just because you find yourself spending more time behind the wheel with your child doesn't mean you're doomed to a decade or more of listening to kids' music. Play what you like to hear in the car.

Ideally, it's great to expose your child to many forms of music, from classical and jazz to reggae and rock. One caveat: Be careful about the news programs and talk radio you consume. Your child is paying attention even if it doesn't seem like it, so if the subject or language isn't appropriate, find something else that is.

Bonus: How to encourage your budding musician.

Look ahead to 6 ¼-years

Was this article helpful?

Doctor visit: The 6-year checkup

Your 6 1/2-year-old: Milestones and development

Your 7-year-old: Milestones and development

Your 6 1/4-year-old: Milestones and development

BabyCenter's editorial team is committed to providing the most helpful and trustworthy pregnancy and parenting information in the world. When creating and updating content, we rely on credible sources: respected health organizations, professional groups of doctors and other experts, and published studies in peer-reviewed journals. We believe you should always know the source of the information you're seeing. Learn more about our editorial and medical review policies .

AAP. 2018. 10 Tips for parents of picky eaters. American Academy of Pediatrics. https://www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/toddler/nutrition/Pages/Picky-Eaters.aspx Opens a new window [Accessed December 2020]

AAP. 2018. Kids and tech: Tips for parents in the digital age. American Academy of Pediatrics. https://www.healthychildren.org/English/family-life/Media/Pages/Tips-for-Parents-Digital-Age.aspx Opens a new window [Accessed December 2020]

Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics. 2020. Water: How much do kids need? https://www.eatright.org/fitness/sports-and-performance/hydrate-right/water-go-with-the-flow Opens a new window [Accessed December 2020]

ADA. Undated. Eruption charts. American Dental Association. https://www.mouthhealthy.org/en/az-topics/e/eruption-charts Opens a new window [Accessed December 2020]

AOA. Undated. School-aged vision: 6 to 18 years of age. American Optometric Association. https://www.aoa.org/healthy-eyes/eye-health-for-life/school-aged-vision?sso=y Opens a new window [Accessed December 2020]

CDC. 2020. About child & teen BMI. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention https://www.cdc.gov/healthyweight/assessing/bmi/childrens_bmi/about_childrens_bmi.html Opens a new window [Accessed December 2020]

CDC. 2020. Developmental milestones: Middle childhood (6–8 years of age). Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. https://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/childdevelopment/positiveparenting/middle.html Opens a new window [Accessed December 2020]

MedlinePlus. 2020. School-age children development. https://medlineplus.gov/ency/article/002017.htm Opens a new window [Accessed December 2020]

Milne AA. 1927. Now We Are Six. New York, NY: Penguin Books.

National Sleep Foundation. 2020. Children and sleep. https://www.sleepfoundation.org/children-and-sleep Opens a new window [Accessed December 2020]

Where to go next

The truth about homework in America

by: Carol Lloyd | Updated: February 9, 2023

Print article

Not excited about homework? We can hardly blame you. But how families handle homework in America can have a huge impact on their child’s short-term and long-term academic success. Here’s a glimpse at how American families approach homework, and some tips that may help you decide how to handle homework in your home.

Model how much you value your child’s education

Think of your child’s nightly homework as a time to model how much you value your child’s learning and education. Get in the habit of asking your child what homework they have each evening, looking over their homework when they’re done each night, praising their hard work, and marveling at all that they are learning. Your admiration and love is the best magic learning potion available.

Set up a homework routine American parents who want their children to graduate from high school and go to college take learning at home seriously. They turn off the TV and radio at homework time. They take away access to video games and smartphones. They make sure the child gets some exercise and has a healthy snack before starting homework because both are shown to help kids focus. When it’s time for homework, they (try to) ensure their child has a quiet place where they can focus and have access to the grade-appropriate homework basics, like paper, pencils, erasers, crayons, and tape for kids in younger grades and calculators and writing materials for kids in older grades.

Helping with homework when you don’t read/speak English

So how can you help with homework if you can’t read your child’s homework because it’s in English — or because the math is being presented in a way you’ve never seen? If you can’t understand your child’s homework, you can still do a lot to help them. Your physical presence (and your authority to turn off the TV) can help them take homework time seriously. Your encouragement that they take their time and not rush through the work also will help. Finally, your ability to ask questions can do two important things: you can show your interest in their work (and thus reinforce the importance you place on learning and education) and you can help your child slow down and figure things out when they’re lost or frustrated. A lot of learning happens when children have a chance to talk through problems and ideas. Sometimes, just describing the assignment or problem to you can help the solution click for your child.

What’s the right amount of homework?

It’s often in first grade that kids start receiving regular homework and feel stressed and lost if they don’t complete it. If your child is having trouble adjusting to their new routines, know that it’s not just your child. Families all across America are having the same issues in terms of figuring out how to create quiet, focussed time for a young child to read, write, and do math inside a bustling home. In first grade, your child will likely be asked to do somewhere between 10 and 30 minutes of homework a night, sometimes in addition to 20 minutes of bedtime reading. ( The National PTA’s research-based recommendation is 10 to 20 minutes of homework a night in first grade and an additional 10 minutes per grade level thereafter.) If your child is getting a lot more than that, talk to your child’s teacher about how long your child should be spending on homework and what you can do to help.

Comparing U.S. homework time to other countries

If you’ve come from another country and recall your childhood homework taking less time, you may think it’s because you’re foreign. The truth is, most parents who grew up in the U.S. are feeling the same way. In the past few decades homework for younger grades has intensified in many schools. “The amount of homework that younger kids — ages 6 to 9 — have to do has gone up astronomically since the late ’80s,” says Alfie Kohn, author of the 2006 book The Homework Myth: Why Our Kids Get Too Much of a Bad Thing. So if you feel surprised about the quantity of homework your child is bringing home, you’re not alone.

According to an international study of homework, 15-year-olds in Shanghai do 13.8 hours of homework per week compared to 6.1 hours in the U.S. and 5.3 hours in Mexico and 3.4 hours in Costa Rica. But here’s the thing: academic expectations in the U.S. vary widely from school to school. Some American elementary schools have banned homework. Others pile on hours a night — even in the younger grades. By high school, though, most American students who are seriously preparing for four-year college are doing multiple hours of homework most nights.

Not into homework? Try this.

Homework detractors point to research that shows homework has no demonstrated benefits for students in the early elementary grades. “The research clearly shows that there is no correlation between academic achievement and homework, especially in the lower grades,” says Denise Pope, senior lecturer at the Stanford University Graduate School of Education and the author of the 2015 book, Overloaded and Underprepared: Strategies for Stronger Schools and Healthy Successful Kids .

On the other hand, nightly reading is hugely important.

“One thing we know does have a correlation with academic achievement is free reading time,” says Pope. “We know that that is something we want schools to encourage.” Since the scientific evidence shows the most impact comes from reading for pleasure, don’t skip bedtime reading. If your child is not being given any homework, make sure to spend some of that extra time reading books in either English or Spanish.

Homes Nearby

Homes for rent and sale near schools

How our schools are (and aren't) addressing race

What should I write my college essay about?

What the #%@!& should I write about in my college essay?

Should your teen take the PSAT — and if so, when?

Yes! Sign me up for updates relevant to my child's grade.

Please enter a valid email address

Thank you for signing up!

Server Issue: Please try again later. Sorry for the inconvenience

Welcome, Login to your account.

Recover your password.

A password will be e-mailed to you.

• 6 Tips For Raising a Child Alone as a Single Parent
• Sex, Love & Feelings: How Do Guys Get Emotionally Attached?
• How Do You Define Family? The True Meaning (& Some Definitions) of Family
• Step-Parents: 17 Tips to Balance Your Family and Your Relationship
• Having a Fun Time with Early-Teen Grandchildren (Ages 12-15)
• What’s Wrong With “Mommy Juice” & “Wine-O-Clock” Culture?
• What Are The Positive Effects of Helicopter Parenting?
• Soap for Swearing: Is it Acceptable Today?
• Here’s What You Can Do When Your Partner Doesn’t Want To Have Children
• Step Parent Problems: Advice on Boundaries

Your Age-by-Age Guide to Homework

Are you scared to look in your child’s book bag at the end of the day?

And I’m not talking about the forgotten sandwiches that migrate to the bottom of a full backpack.

I mean the dreaded homework assignments that loom within folders and binders, just waiting to be ignored and fought over for the rest of the evening.

Typically when parents think of the word “homework”, they quickly associate it with the term “fight”.

But homework doesn’t have to be a fight – a struggle at times, yes, but now a full out war.

Understanding what homework looks like at each grade level is a great start to helping support your child in completing their school work.

Also, the earlier you focus on creating an environment of learning and studying, the easier time your child will have as they progress through school.

Here’s your guide on setting up your child for academic success as well as what kind of homework to expect for each grade:

Setting Up For Success

From day one, homework is important in developing good study skills.

In order to encourage your child to complete their homework and take it seriously, you need to establish a proper homework environment .

Here are some tips for setting your child up for homework success:

• Set a regular homework time. Homework should be done at the same time each evening to establish a routine. Just make sure you’re allowing your little one some time to decompress when they get home before jumping into more schoolwork.
• Create a study area. Give your child a place to with proper lighting, materials and few to now distractions.
• Keep an eye on their work. Involve yourself in the process not only by helping them with homework, but monitoring their progress as well.
• Be a role model. While you may not have homework at this stage in your life, you can model good study habits by reading and pursuing your own learning opportunities.

You may think your child is a little Einstein when they start school, but the learning material will progressively get more difficult as they age.

Encouraging good study habits will give them the skills they need to continue their success through school.

Grade-by-Grade Homework Guide

Kindergarten.

When your little one is in kindergarten, it’s likely they won’t have much for homework.

However, you may find the teacher sending home easy tasks such as practicing sight words, letters, numbers and working on patterns.

Since there shouldn’t be a lot of academic expectation from children this young, it’s easy to navigate the homework by making it fun and play-based.

Children learn best through tactile activities, so materials such as PlayDoh can be used to create numbers and letters as well as designing patterns using different colors.

A whiteboard is a great tool to practice what they are learning, especially sight words. Write out the word, have your child read it and let them erase it before moving on to the next one.

Kindergarten homework tends to be pretty repetitive, meaning that your child is likely going to practice the same material each night on a week-to-week basis.

Even if your little one is catching on quick to the material, it’s important to keep up with the homework habit. This is going to help them develop healthy studying habits as they move from grade to grade.

Elementary School: Grades 1 to 2

Once your child moves from kindergarten into grade 1, the learning environment becomes less play-based and more academic.

This doesn’t mean you can’t continue making homework fun! At this age, their focus is still on playing, so you can keep using novel materials when doing homework.

The workload is likely not going to increase during these grades, but the material may become more challenging.

In order to keep homework from becoming too time consuming, you may have to mix straight-up review with play.

Use unique activities when it comes to concepts your child is struggling with and quick reviews for the learning objectives they have easily grasped.

By these grades, teachers typically encourage your child to be reading. This aspect of homework can be delayed until bedtime – which makes reading seem less like “work” and more like a leisurely activity.

Elementary School: Grades 3 to 5

By the time your little one enters grade 3, and until they finish elementary school, they should begin to complete their homework independently.

While it’s important that you remain on standby to help them with difficult concepts, you should be able to set up each homework activity and allow them to complete them on their own.

During this time, students begin to progress from simply practicing basic skills and mastering them onto more complex skills.

This means that homework is going to become more challenging, which is why focusing on a good homework routine during these grades is very important.

If you find your child resisting their homework at this age, there’s nothing wrong with offering an incentive for completing it. Try to stay away from monetary rewards and focus more on fun activities they can engage in once homework is completed.

Remember to not make homework seem like a cumbersome chore – instead, cheer your child on as they work through it. Praise them for doing a good job.

Middle School: Grades 6 to 8

Once your child hits middle school, they should be able to complete their homework assignments on their own.

Homework at this grade level is going to shift more heavily from practicing concepts to completing assignments such as essays and projects.

This is the beginning stages of the foundation of study skills they will need to succeed in high school as well as college or university.

During this time, students are beginning to rely more on technology to complete their assignments. Make sure your child has access to a tablet or computer they can use to conduct research as well as seek help for their homework.

However, it’s important for you to stay involved in their progress. Regular check-ins with their homework will not only help your child stay on track but it will also show them that you want to be involved in their education.

High School: Grades 9 to 12

It’s in high school where a student’s homework load balloons and becomes more time consuming than it was before.

Luckily, kids at these grade levels are able to choose a portion of their courses, so they have a vested interest in what they are learning.

However, with all the changes they are experiencing emotionally and physically, this period of their lives can be extremely stressful.

Maintaining that homework routine is more important now than ever. Stressed-out teens may become overwhelmed with the workload and feel compelled on throwing in the towel on completing homework assignments.

Continue to be supportive by helping them plan and prepare for homework assignments as well as tests and exams .

While you may not be able to help them with the homework material (what is “new” math, anyway?), you can certainly lend a hand when it comes to time management and getting the homework done.

You Can Make the Difference

When left to their own devices, children can’t be expected to take their schoolwork 100% seriously.

It’s your job as the parent to support and guide them through their homework and assignments.

Building good habits now is going to make all the differences as your child progresses through school.

How do you deal with homework hurdles? Share your tips in the comments!

My name is Chelsy and I am a single mother, blogger, and freelance writer. I blog about parenting at Motherhood+Mayhem (motherhoodandmayhem.online) and about working from home at Mama Needs Coffee (mamaneedscoffee.online). When I'm not writing or blogging, you can find me building blanket forts in my living room.

Your email address will not be published.

Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment.

7 Easy Ways to Help Your Kids To Finish Their Homework…

404 Not Found

• Subscribers

• Book Lists by Age
• Book Lists by Category
• Reading Resources
• Language & Speech
• Raise a Reader Blog
• Back to School
• Success Guides by Grade
• Homework Help
• Social & Emotional Learning
• Activities for Kids

The Age-by-Age Guide to Teaching Kids Time Management

Use these tips to help your child discover how to plan and prioritize her time..

Many kids are overwhelmed by the prospect of fitting everything they have and want to do into the few short hours after school. Between homework, activities, and just time to play, there’s a lot to do. But even though most kids don’t have the cognitive skills to organize their schedules independently until middle school, you can start teaching them how to plan and prioritize their time now. “When we teach children strategies for time management from an early age, they internalize them, which sets them up for lifelong success,” says Lynn Meltzer, Ph.D., president of the Research Institute for Learning and Development , a nonprofit research and educational organization.

Wondering how the heck to begin? No worries. Teachers shared their tips on the essential concepts and lessons to teach, age by age, so you can make this school year’s schedule more manageable, successful, and a whole lot more fun for everyone! 

Time Management Tips for Preschoolers

For 3- and 4-year-olds, time is essentially divided into now, and not now. But that’s enough to help them figure out how to predict and plan what comes next. To reinforce that knowledge:

• Talk about the changing seasons. All those leaf prints (and later in the year, snowflakes) on display in almost every preschool classroom aren’t coincidental, says Stephanie Lampert, a pre-K teacher from Atlanta. The seasons are a primary vehicle for introducing the cyclical nature of time. “It’s an extremely abstract concept,” she says, “and preschoolers are extremely concrete thinkers. By observing a tree over the seasons, for example, kids can see the progression: The green leaves of summer turn red, then brown, and eventually fall off the tree before coming back to life again in the spring. This is a tangible representation of the passage of time that little ones can understand.” How does that help with time management? By observing the patterns in nature and in their daily lives, little kids intuitively grasp the concept of time — and how to create order. Reinforce those lessons by having your child sort family photos by seasons, for instance. Or point out patterns in nature when you go for a walk.
• Create a (picture) schedule. “As adults, we use apps and calendars to remind us what we should be doing and when. In the preschool world, we use pictures — like an apple for snacktime and a book for storytime,” says Ellen Dietrick, a Needham, MA, preschool director whose classrooms are dotted with visual cues to keep her young charges on track. So while these 3- and 4-year-olds can’t tell you the exact hour they have snacks, they know it comes after circle time and before the bathroom break. “It gives them a comforting sense of order and predictability,” Dietrick says. Since little kids love routines and repetition so much, create charts of your child’s morning and bedtime rituals. Then have your child check off the steps as he does them — an important lesson in breaking up a bigger chore into smaller, more manageable ones. Try these nine ways to make choretime fun , too. 
• Practice waiting. “Time management, at its most basic level, is the ability to delay gratification,” a skill linked to better study habits and grades, among other things, says Dietrick. To strengthen time management, Dietrick devises situations that require her students to wait for something they want. “If they clamor for pajama day, for example, we schedule it for a week away, rather than the following day,” she explains. “We mark the days off on the calendar and build up the excitement as the event gets closer. This gives them a sense of what it feels like to postpone something — and a positive experience to associate with it.” Try something similar with outings and birthdays: Begin talking up that trip to the zoo a few days beforehand, for instance, or tell your child to keep a running birthday wish list. Even planting a bulb, watering it, and watching it slowly bloom teaches the art of patience.

Time Management Tips for Children in Grades K to 2

As kids move through these early grades, they’re learning to read calendars and clocks. Those are the basics they need to stick to a schedule. To reinforce the skill:

• Find a place for everything. “A kid can’t finish his morning work if he can’t find his pencil. So organization has to come before time management,” notes Staci Carper, a first-grade teacher from Marietta, GA. To motivate her students, Carper created Deskalina, a cousin of the tooth fairy, who looks for clean and orderly desks and leaves a note, a prize, or a piece of candy when she finds one. When Deskalina starts flitting about, the desks in Carper’s classroom suddenly become tidy. Carper also sets up clear routines, like a “Keep Here” folder for unfinished schoolwork and a “Take Home” one for homework. To encourage your child to keep her homework supplies (or room) organized, invent your own mythical being to bestow treats and notes. An easy-to-spot weekly checklist (“Homework in backpack? Reading log signed?”) will also go a long way in keeping your kid on top of things.
• Use a visual timer. To help her first graders comprehend how much time is left to complete a task, Carper displays a pie-like visual timer on her Smartboard. When she sets it for 15 minutes, for example, one-quarter of the “pie” turns green. As the seconds tick away, the slice becomes smaller, and when there are only five minutes left, the slice turns red. Seeing time literally slipping away can help kids pace themselves, she explains. You don’t have to be a teacher to score a visual timer — apps like Children’s Countdown (for younger kids) and Time Timer  fit the bill just as well. So do old-school egg and sand timers. Use any during homework sessions. If you have a second grader, for instance, set the timer for 20 or 25 minutes. Give your child a star each night he finishes before the buzzer, and reward a week’s worth of stars with a special treat over the weekend (like a one-on-one walk to the park with you). The goal is to help kids tackle their assignments more effectively and efficiently, while making them more aware of the ticking clock, Carper says.
• Be clear about consequences. “Grade-schoolers can and should be held accountable for their own assignments and they need to feel the consequences when they drop the ball,” says Joan Greenfield, a second-grade teacher from West Hartford, CT. Sometimes those results happen naturally (i.e., if she doesn’t study her spelling words, she probably won’t do well on the test); other times an adult has to set the ramifications. Every Friday, for example, Greenfield has something called Choice Time, when students get to choose what they want to play with, from board games to Legos to computers. “My students live for Choice Time. But our class rule is that they only get to participate if they’ve completed all the assignments in their classwork folders.” The valuable lesson kids get? “Good things happen when I work hard and manage my time and missing them is what happens when I don’t,” Greenfield explains. Your child has a better shot at absorbing this lesson if you resist the urge to email an excuse to the teacher every time she fails to turn in her homework, says Greenfield. Instead, give your kid the onus of explaining to the teacher what went wrong, and how she plans to avoid the problem next time. Discover more do's and don't for helping your child with homework . 

Time Management for Children in Grades 3 to 5

Homework and extracurriculars increase at this age so it’s even more important that kids learn how to set goals, prioritize, organize, and think flexibly, says Dr. Meltzer. Your goal: To get your child to manage his time more purposefully, without a lot of nagging and hovering. How to accomplish this:

• Work on estimating time. “In order to make a realistic schedule, you need a good sense of how long things take,” says Marcia Grosswald, an upper-elementary resource teacher in Summit, NJ. To teach this vital skill, Grosswald has her students spend a few minutes at the end of the day planning their after-school hours. “I give them a chart that breaks the afternoon and evening hours into 15-minute intervals,” she explains. “Each time slot is followed by three columns: what kids plans to do, what they actually did, and reflection.” The reflection piece is essential, Grosswald says, because constantly reassessing how things are going helps a kid adapt his schedule accordingly: Last time I had a soccer game at 5 p.m., I had tough time concentrating on my homework afterward. This time, I’m going to do my hardest assignments before practice.  If your child’s teacher doesn’t do this, do it yourself at home. Make a chart, have your child fill out the first column himself, and then fill out the last two items together, discussing what went according to plan — and what your child can do about the things that went awry.
• Plan for long-term assignments. Deciding when to do tonight’s math assignment is one thing. Figuring out how and when to tackle the book report diorama that’s due three weeks from Tuesday is quite another.  “The key with long-range projects is to break them down into smaller steps — reading the book, for instance, or shopping for materials — and then break those tasks down into even smaller nightly assignments, like reading chapters one to three,” says Amy Broocke, who coordinates a tutoring program at her school in Richmond, VA. She also suggests your child use sticky notes when she’s adding tasks to the calendar; that way, the note can easily be moved to another day if the assignment takes longer than expected. Your child can also plan the steps necessary to complete a project by working backward from the due date, suggests Grosswald. Talk through the process together so the assignment feels less overwhelming: You probably need a day to shop for materials and three days to do the diorama. That leaves you with 10 days to finish the book. It’s 150 pages long so you need to read 15 pages a day. Here's how to create a stress-free study space . 
• Set priorities. “It’s essential kids learn to differentiate between ‘have tos’ and ‘want tos’ and learn to prioritize and self-monitor,” says Meltzer. To help her class do that, Grosswald uses a rock, pebble, and water analogy. The rocks and pebbles represent the students’ duties, she explains, with the rocks signifying their most essential tasks (like school, homework, and sleep) and the pebbles representing their extracurricular commitments. The water stands in for want-to-dos, like video games and hanging out with friends. “I use a jar to represent a day,” she says. “The rocks go in first because they are things you have to do whether you like it or not. Next come the pebbles. But there’s still some room in the jar, so we pour water until our jar — and the day is full.” If you do the rock jar at home, as I did, you’ll have a chance to chat with your kid about her goals, priorities and passions. Don’t be afraid to make changes if you notice the balance is a bit out of whack. After our conversation, we decided Emma would kick off the school year with fewer extracurricular pebbles crammed between the rocks — and a lot more of that refreshing water known as chill time.

Photo credit: 101cats/iStockphoto

ONLINE PARENTING COACH

Help for parents with strong-willed, out-of-control teens and preteens.

Defiant Children Who Refuse To Do Homework: 30 Tips For Parents

• Your child doesn’t understand the work and needs some extra help. It’s possible that your youngster doesn’t want to do his homework because he really needs help.  Also, it can be challenging for moms and dads to accept that their youngster might need help with homework, because there is often a stigma attached to kids who need tutoring. 
• Your child is addicted to TV and video games. Moms and dads often find it very difficult to limit these activities. But, understand that playing video games and watching TV doesn’t relax a youngster’s brain.  In fact, it actually over-stimulates the brain and makes it harder for him to learn and retain information.  Too much of watching TV and playing video games contributes to your youngster struggling with school and homework in more ways than one.
• Your child is exhausted from a long day at school. In the last 10 to 20 years, the needs of kids have not changed, however the pace of life has.  Most moms and dads are busy and have very little down time, which inevitably means that the youngster ends up with less down time too.  He is going to be less likely to be motivated to work when there is chaos all around him.  
• Your child is not sleeping enough. Sleep is one of the most under-appreciated needs in our society today. When a child doesn’t get enough sleep, it can cause him to be sick more often, lose focus, and have more emotional issues. Kids often need a great deal more sleep than they usually get.  
• Your child is over-booked with other activities. Moms and dads want their youngster to develop skills other than academics. Because of this, they often sign-up their youngster for extracurricular activities (e.g., sports or arts).  
• Your child is overwhelmed by your expectations. Moms and dads want their youngster to be well-rounded and to get ahead in life.  Along with this comes getting good grades.  All these expectations can put a lot of pressure on your youngster and may cause him to become burned-out and want to find an escape.
• instructions are unclear
• neither you nor your youngster can understand the purpose of assignments
• the assignments are often too hard or too easy
• the homework is assigned in uneven amounts
• you can't provide needed supplies or materials 
• you can't seem to help your youngster get organized to finish the assignments
• your youngster has missed school and needs to make up assignments
• your youngster refuses to do her assignments, even though you've tried hard to get her to do them
• Do you understand what you're supposed to do?
• What do you need to do to finish the assignment?
• Do you need help in understanding how to do your work?
• Have you ever done any problems like the ones you're supposed to do right now?
• Do you have everything you need to do the assignment?
• Does your answer make sense to you? 
• Are you still having problems? Maybe it would help to take a break or have a snack.
• Do you need to review your notes (or reread a chapter in your textbook) before you do the assignment? 
• How far have you gotten on the assignment? Let's try to figure out where you're having a problem.

How do I get my over-achieving daughter to slow down?

"I have taken the quiz and surprisingly found that I was a severely over indulgent parent. This angers me because I didn't think...

• Trying to Conceive
• Signs & Symptoms
• Pregnancy Tests
• Fertility Testing
• Fertility Treatment
• Weeks & Trimesters
• Staying Healthy
• Preparing for Baby
• Complications & Concerns
• Pregnancy Loss
• Breastfeeding
• School-Aged Kids
• Raising Kids
• Personal Stories
• Everyday Wellness
• Safety & First Aid
• Immunizations
• Food & Nutrition
• Active Play
• Pregnancy Products
• Nursery & Sleep Products
• Nursing & Feeding Products
• Clothing & Accessories
• Toys & Gifts
• Ovulation Calculator
• Pregnancy Due Date Calculator
• How to Talk About Postpartum Depression
• Editorial Process
• Meet Our Review Board

How to Get Your Child to Do What You Ask the First Time

Stephanie Rausser / Getty Images

Much to the universal dismay of moms and dads, children often ignore requests and directions from their parents. Sometimes kids don't hear what's being communicated and other times they forget your instructions. Additionally, they might purposefully ignore what they hear the first time. They do this because they don't want to oblige, are too distracted to focus on your request, are waging a form of protest, or are are attempting to continue a desired behavior.

While this listening issue may sort itself out as a child matures, there are steps you can take to set expectations for responsiveness and begin to curb this behavior. This starts with making some adjustments in how you ask your child to do what you say.

Repeating requests over and over— get up and brush your teeth, start your homework, clean up your room —is an energy burner and source of great frustration for many parents. In many cases, parents fall into a pattern of always making several requests of a child.

You might tell your child to do something, then tell them again 10 minutes later, and again 30 minutes later, only realizing at that point that they still haven't done what you asked. When you have to ask your child to do something for what seems like the umpteenth time, frustration builds up and your reaction is often not a calm one. This is how a simple request becomes a source of tension and conflict.

How to Get Your Child to Comply

Before you get too angry, it's important to note that your child may not be ignoring you on purpose. They really might not have heard you or have forgotten, as kid's working memory is not as efficient as you might expect. Also, they may fully intend to do what you're asking but just play to do it later. But there are a variety of strategies you can use to get your child to do what you ask the first time.

Get Their Attention

Science has proven that when children become immersed in what they are doing, they don't pay attention to what is going on around them. In fact, the research points out that kids under the age of 14 lack "peripheral awareness," which means that if your child is focused on a toy, book, game, or TV show when you ask them to do something, their brain is tuned into that activity and not much more.

That means that, at the very least, you must make eye contact when you request that your child do something. It works best if you can go up to them, touch their arm or rest a hand on their shoulder, and get down to eye level. Encourage them to make eye contact with you in return and repeat what you have just asked them to do. That way you both know that the request was made and heard.

If you are busy in another room, ask your child to come to you before you make your request.

Change Your Approach

If you have approached your child as above and it still takes repeated nagging or begging on your part to get them to do as you say, then you may need a new game plan. Many children have developed several strategies to put things off as long as possible. Kids don’t quite understand the consequences of not doing undesirable tasks and are more motivated by what brings them joy, rather than what has to get done.

The fact of the matter is that most adults wouldn't categorize these activities as fun either. So, children learn to distract parents by whining, bringing up something else to do at that moment, starting an argument, or just downright ignoring the request. To curb your child from stalling or ignoring you, you will need to put a little bit more time and attention in the way you approach the situation.

Breaking a child's tendency to ignore you or resist cooperating when you say something the first time will take time and some practice on your part. However, the results will be less frustration, anger, and stress for you, and hopefully more respect, compliance, and self-discipline from your child.

It's best to start practicing these steps with a request that does not require you to leave the house soon afterward. At the beginning of the exercise, there may be tantrums and lengthy explanations, which all take some considerable time.

Set a Time Frame

Decide in your own mind what you want the child to do and the time frame you will accept for their compliance (immediately, within 15 minutes, etc.) Check in with yourself about the reason behind your choices and whether that actually matches your request.

Be Specific

Don't phrase your request as a question. Tell them specifically what you want them to do in a direct way. For example, rather than asking, "Can you please go brush your teeth now?" say, "Please go brush your teeth right now so you can get to bed on time."

Watch for Compliance

It's easy to give an instruction and pivot back to what you were doing beforehand. At the beginning of this practice, avoid doing so. Check immediately to see if what you requested was done. That way, your child has accountability and knows you are serious about them complying with the request.

Check for Understanding

If they don't begin doing what you asked or don't complete the task, calmly ask them "What did I ask you to do?" Make sure the child is clear about what is expected. If they can correctly tell you, say, "That's good, now please get to it."

Praise Success

If your child does what you asked, tell them what a good job they did and how much you appreciate them taking action. It's easy to forget to do this, but remembering to reinforce the compliance with praise can go a long way in reinforcing this behavior.

Give Fair Warning

If they don't do what you asked after the first or second request, then it's time to explain why you are asking them to do that specific task and what the consequences are if they don't comply. Just repeating “because I said so” is not effective and may lead to other issues with compliance.

If possible, show your child the actual impact of their behavior so that they know that your requests are not arbitrary. An example of this is to let your child know that if they don't do something you have requested, it affects others.

For example: “Please go brush your teeth right now. Bedtime is in 15 minutes. If you don't brush your teeth right now, there won't be any time left to read a story tonight. Daddy really looks forward to reading with you before bed and I know you enjoy reading with him, too."

Be Consistent and Follow Through

If your reasonable request is followed up by more defiance and temper tantrums, then it is time to follow through with the consequence you have set. Be firm and keep at it. Consistency with this step is key to letting your child know that you are serious when you make a request the first time.

These steps may seem ineffective the first several times you employ them but stick with it. Eventually, both of you will get used to the method. You will get better at phrasing your requests firmly and purposefully the first time, and your child will come to understand that you do not ask arbitrary or unreasonable requests of them.

Waterman AH, Atkinson AL, Aslam SS, Holmes J, Jaroslawska A, Allen RJ. Do actions speak louder than words? Examining children's ability to follow instructions .  Mem Cognit . 2017;45(6):877-890. doi:10.3758/s13421-017-0702-7

Remington A, Cartwright-Finch U, Lavie N. I can see clearly now: the effects of age and perceptual load on inattentional blindness .  Front Hum Neurosci . 2014;8. doi:10.3389/fnhum.2014.00229

American Academy of Pediatrics. What's the best way to discipline my child? Reviewed November 5, 2018.

Remington A, Cartwright-Finch U, Lavie N. I can see clearly now: the effects of age and perceptual load on inattentional blindness .  Frontiers in Human Neuroscience . 2014;8.

By Kimberly L. Keith, M.Ed, LPC Kimberly L. Keith, M.Ed., LPC, is a counselor, parent educator, and advocate for children and families in the court and community. 

How Much Homework Do American Kids Do?

Various factors, from the race of the student to the number of years a teacher has been in the classroom, affect a child's homework load.

In his Atlantic essay , Karl Taro Greenfeld laments his 13-year-old daughter's heavy homework load. As an eighth grader at a New York middle school, Greenfeld’s daughter averaged about three hours of homework per night and adopted mantras like “memorization, not rationalization” to help her get it all done. Tales of the homework-burdened American student have become common, but are these stories the exception or the rule?

A 2007 Metlife study found that 45 percent of students in grades three to 12 spend more than an hour a night doing homework, including the six percent of students who report spending more than three hours a night on their homework. In the 2002-2003 school year, a study out of the University of Michigan found that American students ages six through 17 spent three hours and 38 minutes per week doing homework.

A range of factors plays into how much homework each individual student gets:

Older students do more homework than their younger counterparts.

This one is fairly obvious: The National Education Association recommends that homework time increase by ten minutes per year in school. (e.g., A third grader would have 30 minutes of homework, while a seventh grader would have 70 minutes).

Studies have found that schools tend to roughly follow these guidelines: The University of Michigan found that students ages six to eight spend 29 minutes doing homework per night while 15- to 17-year-old students spend 50 minutes doing homework. The Metlife study also found that 50 percent of students in grades seven to 12 spent more than an hour a night on homework, while 37 percent of students in grades three to six spent an hour or more on their homework per night. The National Center for Educational Statistics found that high school students who do homework outside of school average 6.8 hours of homework per week.

Race plays a role in how much homework students do.

Asian students spend 3.5 more hours on average doing homework per week than their white peers. However, only 59 percent of Asian students’ parents check that homework is done, while 75.6 percent of Hispanic students’ parents and 83.1 percent of black students’ parents check.

Teachers with less experience assign more homework.

The Metlife study found that 14 percent of teachers with zero to five years of teaching experience assigned more than an hour of homework per night, while only six percent of teachers with 21 or more years of teaching experience assigned over an hour of homework.

Math classes have homework the most frequently.

The Metlife study found that 70 percent of students in grades three to 12 had at least one homework assignment in math. Sixty-two percent had at least one homework assignment in a language arts class (English, reading, spelling, or creative writing courses) and 42 percent had at least one in a science class.

Regardless of how much homework kids are actually doing every night, most parents and teachers are happy with the way things are: 60 percent of parents think that their children have the “right amount of homework,” and 73 percent of teachers think their school assigns the right amount of homework.

Students, however, are not necessarily on board: 38 percent of students in grades seven through 12 and 28 percent of students in grades three through six report being “very often/often” stressed out by their homework.

• Vishal's account
• Behavior & Discipline

6 Year Old Behaviour Problems – Signs & Discipline Tips

What Normal Behaviour Is Expected From a 6-Year-Old Child?

Common behaviour problems in a 6-year-old child, can too much independence lead to behavioural problems in a six-year-old child, warning signs that indicate serious behavioural issues, how to discipline a 6-year-old kid.

We love our children, and we want to give them the best upbringing so that they can grow as good and successful adults. We want to preserve their innocence. And it’s always fun to be around kids! They’re full of energy, curiosity, and questions, and it’s the responsibility of the parents to teach them the right things at the right time.

If you don’t discipline children when they do something wrong, things can start getting a little out of hand. Handling behavioural problems in a 6-year-old at home can get quite challenging in certain situations. Let’s take a look when to worry about 6 year old behaviour.

By the age of 6, most children are already in school, and are slowly getting used to the environment. They are in a strange phase, where they aren’t completely grown up enough to be independent yet, but also don’t like to be treated as babies.

Your child will be able to take care of certain problems himself. Indulging in various activities in school and home will form a major part of his life in these years. As he starts to get a better hang of these things, he will gradually make attempts to go beyond them unconsciously, as a natural tendency of human behaviour.

These attempts could result in some behaviour, such as your child throwing a tantrum or not cooperating, simply to get what he wants. Having grasped the basics of language, he might end up talking back to you, on lines similar to how adults converse, although this might not carry a bad connotation to it.

Sometimes, in the struggle to find their own independence, some kids end up teasing or bullying other kids, and try to prove their own self-worth through it.

A bunch of behavioural problems are observed in most children of this age on a wide basis. Some of these are:

1. Back Talk

When you attempt to scold or discipline your child, he might reply with a snarky comment, or point out your mistakes.

2. Defiance

As your child begins to learn how to say no, he might simply refuse to do a chore, or be defiant about it.

Playful bragging is one thing, but some children can go overboard with it, or may even come up with elaborate lies to hide their mistakes.

4. Dawdling

What can be done in a few minutes might take an entire hour for a child, as he simply plays around while doing a certain task, without focusing on what needs to be done.

Children always feel like they want to grow up as soon as they can, which makes them crave independence. A healthy level of independence bestowed on children can help them take certain decisions by themselves, which will help them in the future, but giving them complete independence can make them rebellious.

Most behavioural issues can be handled by being firm and carrying out simple disciplinary strategies. But, a few other behavioural problems require serious intervention and even counselling at times. Let’s see what these 6 year old behavior issues generally are:

1. Sexualised Behaviour

Children are curious about the opposite sex from a young age. However, if the curiosity starts morphing into a sexualised form, which manifests into obsession, aggression, sexualised behaviour, and even harm, this needs to be stopped in its tracks right away.

2. Suicidal Tendencies

Your child might be influenced by anything he sees or hears, and might start wondering about harming himself or killing himself without understanding the consequences of it. This could be fuelled by things he sees on TV or video games. If you notice this, talk to your child about it immediately, or get him some counselling if needed.

3. Constant Fights

Arguments among children are almost a daily affair, especially on playgrounds. But if your child argues to a level that he seems to have no friends, then it requires special attention on your part.

4. Troubling Behaviour at School

Some children tend to constantly misbehave at school, resulting in being punished often, berated by teachers and the principal, and fighting with other students. Take this behaviour seriously, and talk to your child right away.

5. Non-Responsive to Discipline

Most children fall in line and correct their actions once you are firm with them and administer discipline. But, if your child doesn’t respond to it, or reacts by exhibiting even worse behaviour, he may require some counselling.

6. Poor Impulse Control

This can manifest in the form of crying at the smallest reasons, hitting someone when an argument begins, or screaming at anyone who disagrees with him.

7. Emotional Problems

If your child tends to be too emotional, either as anger or sadness, or is on the opposite spectrum, in that he is generally unaffected by anything that occurs around him, it might be a cue to intervene and talk to him about it.

Effectively disciplining your child without letting him hate you is an art. Don’t worry, parents – it’s an achievable goal! Here are a few strategies that can help you with this:

1. Use Tokens

Depending on how your kid behaves, you can either put in place good tokens or bad tokens, or even both, to help him be accountable for his behaviour. Reaching a certain amount of bad tokens can mean that you will put certain restrictions in place, while adding up the good tokens could open up opportunities for him to get a special treat, or get extra hours of play time, etc.

2. Let Them Experience the Consequences

Many parents rush to shield their children from the consequences of their own actions. While this might be necessary in extreme cases, it is necessary for children to learn from their mistakes, and know what consequences or harm their actions can cause in real life. Small actions, like failing to pack a biscuit even while constantly telling so, could result in him staying hungry for a longer time, which can make him remember to do so henceforth.

3. Discipline Correctly

The restrictions or punishments you give your child have to make sense and be based on the context of his behaviour. Not serving him his favourite snack because he played a video game for long hours doesn’t translate the disciplinary message to him in the appropriate manner. Instead, you can restrict your child’s video game timings for the week, and ask him to use those hours properly. If he uses them up before the week is over, he cannot play video games for the remaining days.

4. Use Actionable Statements

The way you present a problematic behaviour to your child governs how your child responds. Instead of telling him he can’t play outside because his homework is incomplete, tell him that he should complete his homework first, so that he can then enjoy playing football with his friends.

5. Give Disciplinary Breaks

If your child is just being unruly for no reason, either ground him for some time or put him on a break from all activities for a specified duration. This way, he will get the message, and won’t behave in such a manner again.

6. Encourage Good Behaviour

Recognise your child’s attempts to be better, the efforts he takes to complete his tasks, or go beyond what’s needed. This will help him be motivated to keep up his good behaviour, and will eventually help him lead his life without any worries.

1. Does My 6-year-old Have ADHD?

Children with ADHD often struggle with behavioural regulation. They might exhibit impulsive speech or actions, display excessive restlessness, engage in inappropriate running or climbing, have difficulty remaining seated, appear constantly active, and experience challenges with patience and turn-taking.

2. How Do I Test My 6-year-old for ADHD?

ADHD diagnosis relies on behavioural history rather than a specific physical or written test. It is determined by evaluating the child’s behavioural patterns both at home and in school.

3. What Stage of Childhood Is Hardest for Parents?

The stage of adolescence is often considered the most challenging for parents. It involves navigating through physical, emotional, and cognitive changes. Struggles for independence, identity formation, and potential conflicts can make this stage particularly demanding for both parents and teenagers. Communication and understanding become crucial.

Dealing with behavioural problems in 6 year olds is not an easy task. Being a caring parent plus a strict disciplinarian is a dual role that is quite difficult for most to adhere to. Remembering to keep loving and caring for your child even when he is being difficult, can help soften the blow of the punishments, and keep your bond strong throughout.

Common Behavior Disorders in Kids Tips on How to Teach a Child to Behave Well in School 7 Year Old Behaviour Problems and Disciplining Strategies

• RELATED ARTICLES
• MORE FROM AUTHOR

15 Important Road Safety Rules to Teach Your Children

How to Convey the Right Message When Your Child Makes Mistakes

16 Lessons You Must Teach Your Sons Before They Become Adults

5 Important Reasons and Methods to Nurture Flexible Thinking in Your Child

Real Reason Why Children Are Naughtier With Moms, Not Dads

15+ Essential Life Lessons for Kids

Popular on parenting.

245 Rare Boy & Girl Names with Meanings

Top 22 Short Moral Stories For Kids

170 Boy & Girl Names That Mean 'Gift from God'

800+ Unique & Cute Nicknames for Boys & Girls

Latest posts.

Giraffe Coloring Pages - Free Printable Pages For Kids

Fairy Coloring Pages - Free Printable Pages For Kids

Harry Potter Coloring Pages - Free Printable Pages For Kids

Cookie Monster Coloring Pages - Free Printable Pages For Kids

Homeschooling for 6 year olds – A complete Guide

Homeschooling refers to the education of children at home instead of in traditional school. Parents are responsible for their child’s education, regardless of their type of schooling.

The below instructions will guide you through the process of Homeschooling your 6-year-old kids.

Table of Contents

A guide to help parents of 6-year-olds who are homeschooling their children

1. prepare your child to be homeschooled.

It takes a lot of hard work and time to homeschool . It will be difficult for your child if they aren’t ready to learn, so it’s best to begin during the summer when they have more free time.

Please encourage them by letting them watch educational TV shows or go on a field trip once a week.

If you find they are having trouble, you can always look up how to help them on the internet.

2. Be encouraging

Parents are the ones who have the authority when it comes to their children’s education, so they should be encouraging them to feel happy and satisfied with what they are doing.

Even if the 6-year-olds are still young, parents can start this by telling them how wonderful they are and how proud their parents are of them.

Furthermore, the parents should not give up on their children’s education just because it is hard. Parents should keep themselves motivated too.

3. Be patient

Aside from being encouraging, the parents need to be patient, so they will not come up with the thought of giving up.

Parents should understand that 6-year-olds are still young and will not be able to learn everything in the blink of an eye.

Allowing themselves to be patient is one way to help their children without forcing them too much.

Remember your actions will decide your future and should not create hate in their minds for schooling altogether.

4. Be creative

Parents should be open to new ideas and not stick with existing ones, which can make things boring for everyone involved.

They should always think outside the box when it comes to studying to keep themselves and their children interested, no matter how tough it may seem at first.

5. Make it fun

Six-year-olds are still very young, so making school fun for them will not be difficult.

Parents should find ways to make their children want to learn and do well in school, such as involving them in other activities such as sports or games.

Even if they are still very young, parents should be careful about how they handle school . They do not have to completely stop everything fun just because it is time for schooling but finding that fine line will be necessary, so the children are more encouraged than anything else.

6. Be involved with your child’s education

It would be difficult for children to learn if their parents were not there to help them every step of the way.

Parents know their children’s personalities and should make it a point that they are involved with what goes on in their children’s schoolwork.

They should ask them questions at home and participate in making the homework plan, among other things.

Educational activities for Homeschooling for 6-year-olds:

This activity will help your child exercise their vocabulary and logical thinking.

You can either make up riddles yourself, or you can look them up online or on Youtube. But if you do this activity with your child, try using simple riddles that the child could probably guess by themselves; remember, this is their first time Homeschooling!

2. Alphabet learning

This activity requires using upper case and lower case letters; you can make your flashcards with the upper case letter on one side and the lower case letter on the other.

Then all you have to do is go through each card, show them both sides of each card, then have them point out which letter matches that side of the card.

You can do this activity by having your child draw something that’s going on in their life right now, it could be a comic strip about what they did at school, or it could be a drawing with stick figures of them doing an activity they enjoy.

This activity will help exercise the child’s creativity and imagination!

This activity will help the child develop their vocabulary and comprehension skills! You can either read them a story or pick out a book that the child might be interested in. Then, after you’re finished reading, ask them questions about what they just read. This will also help them sharpen their memory.

This is an excellent activity for developing the child’s problem-solving skills. You can either do your puzzles with cardboard, or if you want to encourage the child to be more creative on their terms, buy a mystery they probably wouldn’t do on their own.

Curriculum for Homeschooling for 6-year-olds

According to statistics, below is the most suitable curriculum for 6-year-olds..

• Read and write numbers 1-10
• Learn the alphabet in lower and upper case; remember there are two sides to each card so that you can show them both sides.
• Learn about shapes (circle, square, rectangle, triangle)
• Learn about the five senses (sight, smell, taste, touch, and hearing).
• Identify weather patterns.
• Learn about different types of animals.
• Learn how to care for pets (feeding, grooming, etc.)
• Learn how to spell their name.
• Learn basic sentence structure.
• Learn the parts of speech (nouns, verbs, adjectives).
• Learn the alphabet in upper and lower case.
• Learn how to sound out words (syllables).
• Read and write numbers 1-10.
• Learn how to do puzzles.
• Learn to listen to and follow instructions.
• Learn to problem-solve.
• Learn how to sound out words (phonetic sounds) while reading and writing.

Conclusion – Homeschooling for 6-year-olds

Children learn at different rates; some kids pick things up quickly while others take their time. However, some children may be more interested than others, so if you notice that the child isn’t picking up any of this information after a certain amount of time, then go back to the drawing board and think about how else you could present these concepts to them. Try to have fun with these activities because if the child doesn’t understand what you’re trying to teach them, they probably won’t retain any information.

Share this: