the real blonde movie review

The Real Blonde

Where to Watch

Matthew Modine (Joe) Catherine Keener (Mary) Daryl Hannah (Kelly) Maxwell Caulfield (Bob) Elizabeth Berkley (Tina) Marlo Thomas (Blair) Bridgette Wilson-Sampras (Sahara) Buck Henry (Dr. Leuter) Christopher Lloyd (Ernst) Kathleen Turner (Dee Dee Taylor)

Tom DiCillo

Joe and Mary live in Manhattan. She's the breadwinner, working as makeup artist. He's a wannabe actor working as waiter. When a friend gets a soap part ($3600/wk), Joe lowers his standard.

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The Real Blonde Review

29 May 1998

110 minutes

Real Blonde, The

Although it begins and ends in typically quirky fashion (with the travels of a missing pooch), Tom DiCillo's follow-up to Box Of Moonlight - his first dip into romcom waters - is his most mainstream offering yet. That said, The Real Blonde has lost that certain something that earmarked DiCillo's earlier, more offbeat outings, resulting in a film which is pleasant rather than innovative.

Modine is Joe, an unemployed actor eking out a living as a waiter in New York and turning down any thesp jobs liable to send his credibility crashing to the floor. While the best he can eventually muster is a walk-on in a Madonna video, his acting buddy Bob (Caufield) lands a lucrative role in a daytime soap opera, where he quickly becomes involved with his fair-tressed co-star (Hannah). Stuck in an increasingly frustrated rut, which encompasses his make-up artist girlfriend (Keener)'s lack of motivation in the bedroom department, Joe has a chance encounter with a blonde actress (Elizabeth Berkley) and is soon smitten.

Lacking the barbed edge of such offerings as Living In Oblivion (and those who saw that might find Steve Buscemi's brief appearance here a tad familiar), this trots along at a pace which pokes gentle fun at actors and models rather than taking the opportunity to satirise them shamelessly.

The real treat here comes in the snappy script and terrific ensemble playing, with Modine gleefully immature and obnoxious, DiCillo-regular Keener yet again proving her worth as one of the most underrated actresses around, and a whole bevy of cameos (Denis Leary smarmy as a self-defence instructor, Christopher Lloyd inspired as a camp waiter, Kathleen Turner delicious as Joe's sycophantic agent). Nothing ground-breaking, then, but thoroughly agreeable.

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The Real Blonde

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• Duration: 105 mins

Cast and crew

• Director: Tom DiCillo
• Screenwriter: Tom DiCillo
• Matthew Modine
• Catherine Keener
• Daryl Hannah
• Kathleen Turner
• Maxwell Caulfield
• Elizabeth Berkley
• Christopher Lloyd
• Denis Leary
• Steve Buscemi

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The Real Blonde (1997)

Genre: comedy, duration: 105 minuten, country: united states, directed by: tom dicillo, stars: matthew modine , catherine keener and daryl hannah, imdb score: 6,0  (4.356), releasedate: 27 february 1998.

This movie is not available on UK streaming services.

The Real Blonde plot

"What you see isn't always what you get." Joe and Mary have lived together in Manhattan for 6 years. Joe is an actor, who has no agent and no credits, but who is very ambitious. He works as a server in a cafe. Mary works as a makeup stylist for a popular fashion magazine and pays most of the bills. But then Joe can finally land a part in the new Madonna music video.

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Dee Dee Taylor

Young Woman

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Trailer The Real Blonde

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“Blonde” abuses and exploits Marilyn Monroe all over again, the way so many men did over the cultural icon’s tragic, too-short life. Maybe that’s the point, but it creates a maddening paradox: condemning the cruelty the superstar endured until her death at 36 while also reveling in it.

And yet writer/director Andrew Dominik ’s film, based on the fictional novel by Joyce Carol Oates , remains technically impeccable throughout, even though it feels like an overlong odyssey at nearly three hours. The craftsmanship on display presents another conundrum: “Blonde” is riveting, even mesmerizing, but eventually you’ll want to turn your eyes away as this lurid display becomes just too much. My personal breaking point was a POV shot from inside Marilyn’s vagina as she was having a forced abortion performed on her. A lengthy, extreme close-up of a drugged-up Monroe fellating President Kennedy while he’s on the phone in a hotel room also feels gratuitous and is probably why the film has earned a rare NC-17 rating.

Did any of this really happen? Maybe. Maybe not. What you have to understand from the start is that “Blonde” is an exploration of the idea of Marilyn Monroe. It’s as much a biopic of the film star as “ Elvis ” is a biopic of Elvis Presley . It touches on a series of actual, factual events as a road map, from her movies to her marriages. But ultimately, it’s a fantasia of fame, which increasingly becomes a hellscape. That’s more exciting than the typical biography that plays the greatest hits of a celebrity’s life in formulaic fashion, and “Blonde” is consistently inventive as it toys with both tone and form. By the end, though, this approach feels overwhelming and even a little dreary.  

As Marilyn Monroe—or her real name of Norma Jeane, as she’s mostly called in the film— Ana de Armas is asked to cry. A lot. Sometimes it’s a light tear or two as she draws from her traumatic childhood for an acting class exercise. Usually, it’s heaving sobs as the cumulative weight of mental illness and addiction takes its toll. When she’s not crying, she’s naked. Frequently, she’s both, as well as bloody. And in nearly every situation, she’s either a pawn or a victim, a fragile angel searching for a father figure to love and protect her.

Certainly, some of this is accurate—the way Hollywood power brokers regarded her as a pretty face and a great ass when she wanted them to consider her a serious actress and love her for her soul. De Armas gives it her all in every moment; she’s so captivating, so startling, that you long for the part to provide her the opportunity to show more of Marilyn’s depth, to dig deeper than the familiar cliches. She’s doing the breathy, girlish voice, but not perfectly—traces of her Cuban accent are unmistakable—and that’s OK given the film’s unorthodox approach. More importantly, she captures Monroe’s spirit, and often looks uncannily like her. Following standout supporting turns in movies like “ Knives Out ” and “ No Time to Die ,” as well as the delicious trash that was “ Deep Water ,” here is finally the meaty, leading role that showcases all she can do. She’s so good that she makes you wish the role rose to her level.

“Blonde” is a fever dream from the very start. Working with cinematographer Chayse Irivn (“ BlacKkKlansman ,” Beyonce’s “Lemonade”) and frequent musical collaborators Nick Cave and Warren Ellis , Dominik sets the scene with impressionistic wisps of sight and sound. Shadows and ethereal snippets of score mix with ash from a fire in the Hollywood hills blowing through the night sky. The phone rings loudly. The camera swish pans to the left. We’re immediately on edge. It’s Los Angeles 1933, and young Norma Jeane (a poised and heartbreaking Lily Fisher ) is enduring horrific physical and emotional abuse from her volatile and hyperverbal mother (a haunting Julianne Nicholson , always great).

Dominik (“ The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford ”) proclaims his restless style from the beginning—jumping around not just in time, but from high-contrast black and white to rich Technicolor and in between various aspect ratios. Sometimes, the color palette is faded, as if we’re looking at Marilyn in a long-ago photograph. Sometimes, the sound design is muted—as in her classic performance of “I Wanna Be Loved by You” from “ Some Like It Hot ”—to indicate the confusion of her inner state. It’s all thrilling for a while, and de Armas strikes a magnetic figure as the young Marilyn in both her vulnerability and her ambition.

An imagined three-way romance with Charlie Chaplin Jr. ( Xavier Samuel ) and Edward G. Robinson Jr. ( Evan Williams ) brings a welcome vibe of fun and frolic; they’re both beautiful and flirtatious, smoldering and seductive. And it becomes clear as the movie progresses that they’re the only men who loved her for her true self as Norma Jeane while also appreciating the beguiling artifice of Marilyn. This relationship also teaches Norma Jeane to lose herself in the mirror in order to find the famous persona she’ll present to the outside world: “There she is, your magic friend,” “Cass” Chaplin purrs as he caresses her from behind. And Dominik will return to that image of Norma Jeane beseeching her own reflection as a means of conjuring strength. The character’s stark duality gives de Armas plenty of room to show off her impressive range and precise technique.

But too much of “Blonde” is about men chewing Marilyn up and spitting her back out. A studio executive known only as “Mr. Z”—presumably as in Zanuck—rapes her when she visits his office about a part. New York Yankees legend Joe DiMaggio ( Bobby Cannavale ) seems like a decent and tender husband until he turns controlling and violent. Her next husband, playwright Arthur Miller (an understated Adrien Brody ), is patient and kind yet emotionally detached—but by the time Marilyn is married to him, anxiety, booze and pills have wrecked her so significantly that no one could have helped.

She calls these men “Daddy” in the hope that they’ll function in place of the father she never knew but desperately craved, but in the end, everyone lets her down. And “Blonde” does, too, as it strands de Armas in a third-act sea of hysteria. As for the film’s many graphic moments—including one from the perspective of an airplane toilet, as if Marilyn is puking up pills and champagne directly on us—one wonders what the point is. Merely to shock? To show the extent to which the Hollywood machinery commodified her? That’s nothing new.

“Blonde” is actually more powerful in its gentler interludes—when Marilyn and Arthur Miller are teasingly chasing each other on the beach, for example, hugging and kissing in the golden, shimmering sunlight. “Am I your good girl, Daddy?” she asks him sweetly, seeking his approval. But of course, she can’t be happy here, either. All her joyous times are tinged with sadness because we know how this story ends.

More often, Dominik seems interested in scenes like the garish slow-motion of the “Some Like It Hot” premiere, where hordes of ravenous men line the sidewalks for Marilyn’s arrival, frantically chanting her name, their eyes and mouths distorted to giant, frightening effect as if they wish to devour her whole. He similarly lingers in his depiction of the famous subway grate moment from “The Seven Year Itch,” with Marilyn’s ivory halter dress billowing up around her as she giggles and smiles for the crowds and cameras. (The costume design from Jennifer Johnson is spectacularly on-point throughout, from her famous gowns to simple sweaters and capri pants.) We see it in black-and-white and color, in slow-motion and regular speed, from every imaginable angle, over and over again.

After a while, it becomes so repetitive that this iconic, pop culture moment grows numbing, and we grow weary of the spectacle. Maybe that’s Dominik’s point after all. But we shouldn’t be.

In limited theatrical release tomorrow. On Netflix on September 23rd.

Christy Lemire

Christy Lemire is a longtime film critic who has written for RogerEbert.com since 2013. Before that, she was the film critic for The Associated Press for nearly 15 years and co-hosted the public television series "Ebert Presents At the Movies" opposite Ignatiy Vishnevetsky, with Roger Ebert serving as managing editor. Read her answers to our Movie Love Questionnaire here .

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Film credits.

Blonde (2022)

Rated NC-17 for some sexual content.

166 minutes

Ana de Armas as Norma Jeane

Adrien Brody as The Playwright

Bobby Cannavale as The Ex-Athlete

Garret Dillahunt

Sara Paxton as Miss Flynn

Lucy DeVito

Julianne Nicholson as Gladys

Scoot McNairy

Xavier Samuel as Cass Chaplin

Caspar Phillipson as The President

Evan Williams as Eddy G. Robinson Jr.

Rebecca Wisocky as Yvet

Toby Huss as Whitey

Catherine Dent as Jean

Haley Webb as Brooke

Eden Riegel as Esther

Spencer Garrett as President's Pimp

Tygh Runyan as Father

David Warshofsky as Mr. Z

Lily Fisher as Young Norma Jeane

Michael Masini as Tony Curtis

Chris Lemmon

Ned Bellamy as Doc Fell

Sonny Valicenti as Casting Director

Colleen Foy as Pat

Brian Konowal

Tatum Shank as Dick Tracy

Andrew Thacher as Jiggs

Dominic Leeder as Bugs Bunny

Lidia Sabljic as Sweet Sue

Isabel Dresden as Doc Fell's Nurse

Skip Pipo as Dr. Bender

Tyler Bruhn as NYC Acting Student

Ravil Isyanov as Billy Wilder

Tim Ransom as Rudy

Judy Kain as Severe Woman

Time Winters as George Sanders

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Danielle Jane Darling as L.a. Actor #3

Mia McGovern Zaini as Young Norma Jeane

Rob Nagle as Radio Announcer

Emil Beheshti as Brentwood Doctor

Jeremy Shouldis as Tuxedo #2

Ethan Cohn as Assistant to the Director

Steve Bannos as Brentwood Doctor

Mike Ostroski as The Writer

Danielle Lima as Swimsuit Model

Christopher Kriesa as Joe E. Brown

Eric Matheny as Joseph Cotten

Jerry Hauck as Tuxedo #1

Scott Hislop as Marilyn Dancer

Dieterich Gray as Photographer's Assistant

Kiva Jump as Ward Nurse at Norwalk

Patrick Brennan as Joe

Chris Moss as Dancer

Ryan Vincent as Uncle Clive

Brian Konowal as Pissing Man

• Andrew Dominik

Writer (novel)

• Joyce Carol Oates

Cinematographer

• Chayse Irvin
• Adam Robinson
• Warren Ellis

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The Real Blonde Reviews

• 48   Metascore
• 1 hr 47 mins
• Watchlist Where to Watch

The lives of several New York actors and models intertwine as they search for love and meaning in their world of make-believe. Matthew Modine, Catherine Keener, Daryl Hannah, Maxwell Caulfield, Elizabeth Berkley, Marlo Thomas, Bridgette Wilson, Christopher Lloyd, Kathleen Turner, Denis Leary, Steve Buscemi, Buck Henry.

Neurotic New Yorkers look for love in all the wrong places in this oh-so-trendy trifle, crawling with models, actors, artists, pop singers and sundry hangers-on. Mary (Catherine Keener) is a successful makeup artist grappling with the question of whether she hates all men or just the sleazes who hit on her all day. Joe (Matthew Modine) is her sensitive but chronically unemployed actor boyfriend, who's forced to swallow his pride and suck up to powerful casting agent DeeDee Taylor (Kathleen Turner) for a bit in a Madonna video. Joe's shallow buddy Bob (Maxwell Caulfield, affecting a dubious UK accent), meanwhile, lands a lucrative role on a trashy soap, and searches high and low -- mostly low -- for that real blonde (an unsubtle symbol of unattainable perfection) he knows is hiding a world of harshly bleached babes. Comedy is hard, but Tom DeCillo can direct it: witness the bitterly funny LIVING IN OBLIVION. And his cast is nothing if not cool, in a bizarre "one from column A, one from column B" sort of way: smarmy shrink Buck Henry; prissy catering czar Christopher Lloyd; horny self-defense instructor Denis Leary; kinky fashionista Marlo Thomas; GREASE 2 toy boy Caulfield, apparently looking to extricate his career from the elephant's graveyard of direct-to-video dreck; and, of course, blondes Daryl Hannah and Elizabeth Berkley (respectively real and very, very fake). But under the veneer of hip lies a bland romantic comedy wrapped in a layer of less-than-biting lifestyle satire, whose single most authentic moment involves an old woman and her scruffy mutt Buddy. Not cool.

MPAA Rating

Produced by, the real blonde (1997), directed by tom decillo / tom dicillo.

• AllMovie Rating 6
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The Real Blonde (1998)

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Where to Watch

Watch Blonde with a subscription on Netflix.

What to Know

Ana de Armas' luminous performance makes it difficult to look away, but Blonde can be hard to watch as it teeters between commenting on exploitation and contributing to it.

It doesn't matter how well-acted or creatively filmed it is -- watching Blonde is a really unpleasant experience.

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‘Legally Blonde’ Prequel Series ‘Elle’ Is Just the Latest Franchise Installment in Reese Witherspoon’s Enduring Empire

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Reese Witherspoon has bent and snapped her way into a full-fledged “ Legally Blonde ” empire.

While the status of that trilogy installment is still unknown, given that the feature was announced in 2022, Witherspoon has turned instead to building out the “Legally Blonde” brand through TV .

IndieWire can confirm that a “Legally Blonde” prequel series titled “Elle” is in the works at Prime Video, with Witherspoon producing. “Elle” is created by Laura Kittrell, who will also serve as showrunner. The series is centered on Elle Woods in high school leading up to the events in the first movie.

A spinoff  TV series is also set at the streamer, with Witherspoon believed to be reprising her role. “Gossip Girl”-reboot creators Josh Schwartz and Stephanie Savage are writing and executive producing, with Witherspoon and Lauren Neustadter also executive producing through Hello Sunshine.

Witherspoon compared the legacy of “Legally Blonde” to the iconic now-franchise “Top Gun,” with sequel “Top Gun: Maverick” resurrecting the ’80s film. Witherspoon told USA Today in 2022 that she felt protective about steering the “Legally Blonde” franchise in the right direction.

“I’m still hoping that ‘Legally Blonde 3’ is gonna come together in the right way,” she said. “It’s just like ‘Top Gun’: They waited a long time to make another version of that movie, and I loved the nostalgia piece they incorporated in it. So definitely that gave us a lot of inspiration about what we would want to do with Elle Woods and make sure that we had all those same touchstones that mattered to people [back] then.”

And Elle Woods isn’t the only former character Witherspoon is returning to: The mogul actress will star in and produce “Election” sequel “Tracy Flick Can’t Win” from writer/director Alexander Payne.

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Amazon Sets 'Legally Blonde' Origin Story TV Series 'Elle' From Reese Witherspoon

"Legally Blonde" will get the prequel treatment.

Prime Video has ordered a new series from "Legally Blonde" star Reese Witherspoon that will follow her character Elle Woods as a high school student in the '90s, spotlighting the experiences that formed her into the college student fans met in the first "Legally Blonde" movie.

"I had this crazy idea that the world might want to know the origin story of Elle Woods, so here I am to officially tell you the most amazing news ever, which is that we are going back to high school with Elle," Witherspoon told advertisers during Amazon's inaugural upfront presentation on Tuesday. "Before she became the most well-known Gemini vegetarian to graduate from Harvard Law School, she was just a regular '90s high school girl and thanks to Amazon and Hello Sunshine, all you are going to get to know her in this new series."

Hailing from Witherspoon's Hello Sunshine, a part of Candle Media, "Elle" will be showrun by new creator Laura Kittrell ("High School," "Insecure"), who will also serve as EP alongside Witherspoon, Lauren Neustadter, Lauren Kisilevsky and Marc Platt.

The series, which is produced by Hello Sunshine and Amazon MGM Studios, will launch exclusively on Prime Video. Details on a premiere date and casting have yet to be announced.

The news of the series order for the prequel comes over a month after TheWrap reported that multiple "Legally Blonde" spin-off shows  were in the works between Amazon MGM Studios and Hello Sunshine, with "Gossip Girl" developers and producers Josh Schwartz and Stephanie Savage set to write one of the series.

"One of the most quotable, iconic and beloved characters that is ingrained in the fabric of Hollywood history has to be Elle Woods, and we are honored to bring her origin story to our global Prime Video customers," Amazon MGM Studios head of TV Vernon Sanders said. "Reese and Hello Sunshine's vision for this series, coupled with Laura Kittrell's winning voice, made this show completely undeniable."

"I truly couldn't be more excited about this series! Fans will get to know how Elle Woods navigated her world as a teenager with her distinct personality and ingenuity, in ways that only our beloved Elle could do," Witherspoon added. "What could be better than that?! I'm extremely grateful to the incredible teams at Prime Video and Hello Sunshine — along with our amazing writer Laura Kittrell — for making this dream of mine come true. 'Legally Blonde' is back!"

Hello Sunshine is represented by CAA and Hansen Jacobson. Laura Kittrell is represented by UTA and Mosaic.

The post Amazon Sets 'Legally Blonde' Origin Story TV Series 'Elle' From Reese Witherspoon appeared first on TheWrap .

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‘IF’ Review: Invisible Friends, but Real Celebrity Cameos

The film is a slim story about a girl named Bea (Cailey Fleming) who helps a crank named Cal (Ryan Reynolds) play matchmaker. Oh, and Bradley Cooper is a glass of ice water.

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By Amy Nicholson

The big “IF” — as in “imaginary friend” — in John Krasinski’s treacly kids dramedy is a grizzly-sized purple goon who goes by the name Blue. The boy who conjured him was colorblind, he explains. Blue (voiced by Steve Carell) is one of dozens of dreamed-up creatures in Brooklyn who long for their now-grown BFFs to remember they exist.

At the Memory Lane Retirement Community underneath Coney Island, there’s also a pink alligator (Maya Rudolph), a superhero dog (Sam Rockwell), a worn teddy (Louis Gossett Jr.), a retro cartoon butterfly (Phoebe Waller-Bridge), a robot (Jon Stewart), an astronaut (George Clooney), a glass of ice water (Bradley Cooper), a gummy bear (Amy Schumer), a unicorn (Emily Blunt), a flower (Matt Damon), a cat in an octopus costume (Blake Lively), a ghost (Matthew Rhys), a soap bubble (Awkwafina), some green slime (Keegan-Michael Key), and an invisible blob who the credits claim is none other than Brad Pitt.

What’s more impressive: Krasinski’s imagination or the very real friends in his Rolodex?

Most of these characters merely stroll through the frame to say hello, or whine to each other in group therapy. Yet these celebrity cameos take up about as much space as the plot, a gentle, slim story about an unflappable 12-year-old girl named Bea (Cailey Fleming) who helps a crank named Cal (Ryan Reynolds) play matchmaker for the lonely IFs.

If — and this is a rhetorical if — you’re still traumatized by the last shot of Bing Bong, the forgotten imaginary friend in Pixar’s “Inside Out,” breathe easy. There’s no existential threat (or narrative tension) about what might happen if the goofy gang remains consigned to oblivion. Palling about with kids again just sounds nice.

Bea, a solemn preteen with stick-straight hair, is the only child able to see all of the IFs, which is hard to reconcile with the fact that she also seems like the oldest little girl in the world; Reynolds, her foil, is regularly cast as the world’s most immature man, although here he’s been dialed down to a benevolent grouch. With her mother dead, her father (Krasinski) in the hospital, and her grandmother (Fiona Shaw) distracted watching Jimmy Stewart’s “Harvey” on TV, Bea is free to roam the streets of New York — which, to the fellow kids in the audience, might be as extraordinary as all of the shots of her strolling slowly through bedazzled fantasies. (The standout, odd as it sounds, is a musical number set to Tina Turner’s “Better Be Good to Me,” that’s wholly divorced from its erotic context.)

Any child over 5 will predict the Keyser Söze twist in Bea and Cal’s relationship. But this is a film that spells out its intentions for an audience still learning its ABCs, a film where Michael Giacchino’s misty violins never stop insisting how to feel, where Krasinski’s goofy dad literally wears a heart on his chest.

Krasinski has the worthy goal of making a children’s movie with an air of prestige — like his characters, he’s striving to be remembered long past opening weekend — and so the cinematographer Janusz Kaminski obligingly fills the screen with handsome images of spiral staircases and leather-bound books. Still, only two scenes accomplish the transcendence Krasinski is after, and both involve the simplest of all special effects: a shot of an adult human being that asks us to use our own imaginations to see the child inside.

IF Rated PG. Running time: 1 hour 44 minutes. In theaters.

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Movie Reviews

'if' only these imaginary friends are sweet, but could have been so much more.

Bob Mondello

Bea (Cailey Fleming) and Blue (voiced by Steve Carell) in IF. Paramount Pictures hide caption

Bea (Cailey Fleming) and Blue (voiced by Steve Carell) in IF.

The third installment in John Krasinski's blockbuster horror franchise A Quiet Place will soon employ noise-triggered monsters to scare audiences shoutless. But the filmmaker is starting the summer with sweeter monsters — the sweetest, really — in IF .

Which doesn't mean they don't cause 12-year-old Bea ( Walking Dead's Cailey Fleming) to faint right away the first time she sees them — though in fairness, she's got a lot on her mind. Having already lost her mom to cancer, she's moving in with her grandma for a bit while her dad's in the hospital awaiting surgery.

Still, when wouldn't encountering a giant plush critter in the apartment upstairs be startling, even if he turns out to be a sweetheart voiced by Steve Carell? It's an imaginary friend (an "IF," in his parlance) of a kid who's long forgotten about him — and who, being colorblind, named him "Blue" even though he's purple.

Also up there is Blossom (voiced by Phoebe Waller-Bridge), a life-size ballerina doll, and the apartment's harried resident, Cal (Ryan Reynolds), the only person besides Bea who seems able to see IFs.

Movie Interviews

Actor john krasinski takes stock of his 'lottery-ticket life'.

Bea has been trying to be very grown up for her dad, played by director Krasinski. When she visits him at the hospital, he starts dancing with his I.V. pole and cracking jokes, and she has to tell him to dial things back a bit. As the film goes on, you may be tempted to echo that with regard to his directing, but things are certainly lively as the IFs explain that they've started a matchmaking agency to help fellow imaginary friends find new kids. Bea volunteers to help, and is soon introduced to a whole lot of critters – unicorns, dragons, even a flaming marshmallow — at an IF retirement home in Coney Island.

All of which gives Krasinski an excuse to call in an army of digital animators, first to bring life to imaginary critters voiced by his A-list Hollywood buds, including George Clooney, Awkwafina, Matt Damon, Emily Blunt, Jon Stewart, Steve Carell, and the late Lou Gossett Jr. in a warmly avuncular turn as a supervising teddy bear. And then to make the walls and floors of the retirement home morph and flip as if they're just so many pixels.

Listen Carefully: The Tense 'Quiet Place' Sequel Speaks To Our Present Time

At which point, if you're like me, you may start wanting something a little more solid to hold onto — like, say, a plot that holds up, or even that just holds still. This one jumps around as much as the IFs themselves, at first linking them to new kids, then to their now-grown-up original kids, with little logic, and less explanation.

Along the way, some intriguing issues are raised — about wanting to return to childhood, about growing out of childhood, and about dealing with loss.

But mostly the filmmakers detour, decorate and digitize their story rather than telling it, and that doesn't mesh well with the real-world stuff — dad's surgery, for instance, and Bea's wandering all over Brooklyn without her grandma seeming to notice. And yes, I know: IF is a kid-flick, but it still needs grounding. We're in Brooklyn, not Willy Wonkaland.

Hidden Brain

Secret friends: tapping into the power of imagination.

Also, star voices and digital wizardry notwithstanding, IF 's IFs feel generic, especially when they're stealing focus from the live performers. Grandma, for instance. No filmmaker who has actress Fiona Shaw on screen needs special effects.

Krasinski, in fact, clearly knows that. He's crafted a lovely moment where Bea puts a ballet record – the "Adagio of Spartacus and Phrygia" — on the turntable, and Grandma stands listening to it, bathed in twilight at a window, with her back to the camera. She's remembering the dancer she was as a child, and as the music rises, her right hand does too ... just so. And in that lovely, unforced gesture, you realize all the other things Krasinski's sweet little kid flick might have been ... IF only.

The 30 Best Jokes and Craziest Moments From Tom Brady’s Netflix Roast, From Gronk Smashing Glasses to Gisele Divorce Puns

By Clayton Davis

Clayton Davis

Senior Awards Editor

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It was a long night for Tom Brady at his live Netflix comedy roast, as it was for the rest of us watching from home.

Starting with a bloody OJ Simpson jersey and ending with Brady smashing an iPhone on stage, the Netflix live event, “The Greatest Roast of All-Time: Tom Brady,” honored the seven-time Super Bowl champion. The modern-day legend faced his biggest challenge yet: being roasted by comedians and his former NFL teammates.

The QB took so many hits regarding his failed marriage to supermodel Gisele Bündchen, which was surprising in moments where it didn’t seem to let up for a single moment, bringing some of the evening’s biggest laughs. Nonetheless, the “joke of the night” came from the GOAT himself when addressing Kim Kardashian and referencing her ex-husband Kanye West: “I know Kim was terrified to be here tonight. Not because of this, but because her kids are at home with their dad.”

When Kardashian took the stage to toast Brady, she was met with an onslaught of audible boos, but host Kevin Hart came to her aid.

Part of Netflix Is a Joke Fest , “Greatest Roasts of All Time: Tom Brady” featured the former quarterback, known for his 20 seasons with the New England Patriots and three with the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, taking humorous jabs from some of the biggest names in comedy. Hosted by Hart and roastmaster Jeff Ross, the event included Brady’s former teammates Julian Edelman, Rob Gronkowski and Drew Bledsoe, as well as stand-up comics Tom Segura, Nikki Glaser, Andrew Schulz, Bert Kreischer, Tony Hinchcliffe, Sam Jay and more.

“We’re here to roast the greatest quarterback of all time,” Hart quipped. “Oh, wait, Joe Montana’s here?”

Brady made a grand entrance onto a stage surrounded by his former teammates, exclaiming to the crowd, “Are you guys ready? It’s game time. Let’s go!”

VIP tables, occupied by Chelsea Handler, Jim Gaffigan, Shane Gillis and Netflix executives Ted Sarandos and Bela Bajaria, encircled the stage, adding to the star-studded atmosphere of the event.

Brady’s former teammate Gronkowski took the spotlight with the most peculiar moments of the night, delivering a sometimes incoherent barrage of jokes that culminated in smashing a glass on the stage, causing it to shatter and send shards flying onto nearby tables.

Here are some of the 30 best jokes and craziest moments from the special (in no particular order):

• “This is where Jerry Buss laid his dick out. This was called the Fucking Forum.” – Kevin Hart
• “Tom brought Boston with him tonight. I’ve never seen Inglewood so white. It looks like a Bruce Springsteen concert just let out. This used to be the home of the Lakers; now it’s the home of the Quakers.” – Kevin Hart
• “It’s been two years since Tom has gotten divorced. And since then, Tom’s been fucking. Tom has been putting that two-inch tool to work. Tom has been fucking so much; his dick has gotten CTE.” — Kevin Hart
• “You know who else fucked that coach? Gisele. She fucked that karate man…. eight karate classes a day, and she’s still a white belt?” — Kevin Hart
• “Chelsea Handler is here… Speaking of Black dick, Kim is here tonight.”
• “I’ve just come from hell. Aaron Hernandez says hello.” — Jeff Ross
• “I had to dress like OJ because I’m about to kill this white bitch right here.” — Jeff Ross
• “You really put the Jizz in Gisele.” — Jeff Ross
• “I really wanted Kevin [Hart] to host because he already looks like a deflated football.” — Jeff Ross
• “Surely, if Mark Twain were around today, he would call you a N…. a national treasure.” — Jeff Ross
• “I love you, Dana; you’re like Michael Vick but with human beings.” — Jeff Ross
• “We’re doing it Boston-style tonight. You know, it’s going to marathon, and somebody’s gonna bomb.” — Jeff Ross
• “We wanted to roast you in Florida, but because of your governor, we wouldn’t have been able to call you gay.” — Jeff Ross
• “Tom Brady. Five-time Super Bowl MVP, most career wins, most career touchdowns. You have seven rings — well, eight, now that Gisele gave hers back. The only thing dumber than saying yes to this roast was when you said, ‘Hey babe, you should try jiu-jitsu.’” — Nikki Glaser
• “I’m the best decision your organization has ever made. Would you like a massage?”– Jeff Ross
• “Why the fuck didn’t we cheat when I was there?” — Randy Moss
• “The only difference between Tom Brady and Hitler is that Hitler stuck with his wife until the end.” — Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer
• “I love your movies, or as I like to call them, short films.” — Nikki Glaser towards Kevin Hart
• “Your ex-wife’s new boyfriend can kick your ass while eating hers.” — Nikki Glaser
• “Tom also lost $30 million in crypto… Tom, how did you fall for that? Even Gronk was like, ‘Me know that’s not real money.” — Nikki Glaser
• “That’s why Dana [White] is here, so you can learn how to fuck a Brazilian out of half their purse. Sorry, that was a Gisele quote” — Andrew Schulz
• “Or, as I like to call him, Leonardo DiCaprio‘s ex-girlfriend’s ex-husband.” — Julian Edelman
• “This stage has seen more trauma than a Kennedy on the campaign trail.” — Andrew Schulz
• “ACL is the only injury Gronk can spell.” — Andrew Schulz
• “Nikki, who wrote that? Where was that, your entire career?” — Tony Hinchcliffe
• “Bert Kreischer is a king. He looks like the Tiger King, and the Liver King only ate Burger King and had a liver that looked like Martin Luther King, who got beat up by Rodney King.” — Tony Hinchcliffe
• “Your Super Bowl ring is just like my strap-on; just because you put it on doesn’t mean it’s real.” — Sam Jay
• “My kids now excuse themselves to the bathroom by saying I have to go take a Brady.” — Peyton Manning
• “Despite everything we’ve seen here tonight, Gronk was actually useful on the field. Although the bar for Patriots tight ends was pretty low back then: block, catch, don’t murder.” — Tom Brady
• “You retired, then you came back, and then you retired again. I mean, I get it, it’s hard to walk away from something that’s not your pregnant girlfriend.” — Nikki Glaser

Matt Donnelly contributed to this report.

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A young girl who goes through a difficult experience begins to see everyone's imaginary friends who have been left behind as their real-life friends have grown up. A young girl who goes through a difficult experience begins to see everyone's imaginary friends who have been left behind as their real-life friends have grown up. A young girl who goes through a difficult experience begins to see everyone's imaginary friends who have been left behind as their real-life friends have grown up.

• John Krasinski
• Cailey Fleming
• Ryan Reynolds
• 23 User reviews
• 75 Critic reviews
• 48 Metascore

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• Trivia In a recent interview with ET, Carell expressed his excitement for his upcoming reunion with his Office co-star. The actor admitted that he has yet to start filming Imaginary Friends, but is full of anticipation for the opportunity to work with Krasinski again saying, "Well, I haven't started working on the film with him yet, but I can't wait. I'm anticipating just joy and fun. I mean, he's the best, and he's a great director. I'll put him through his paces, you know? I'll make him work for it. I might be one of those persnickety actors that doesn't always agree, or won't come out of my trailer. You think you hired somebody that is a friend, but you got that wrong!"

Cal : What if I told you imaginary friends are real? And when they're kids grow up, they're forgotten.

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• May 12, 2024

I Know That Voice!

• When will IF be released? Powered by Alexa
• May 17, 2024 (United States)
• United States
• Untitled Ryan Reynolds/John Krasinski Film
• Coney Island, Brooklyn, New York City, New York, USA (location)
• Paramount Pictures
• Maximum Effort
• Platinum Dunes
• See more company credits at IMDbPro

Technical specs

• Runtime 1 hour 44 minutes
• Dolby Digital
• D-Cinema 96kHz 7.1
• Dolby Atmos
• 12-Track Digital Sound
• Dolby Surround 7.1
• 1:1.85 DCP flat

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