essays that worked colgate

Applying themselves

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Illustrations by Natalya Bolnova

Herbert Sets Sail

Herbert was what I named my skillfully engineered boat because, let’s face it, who doesn’t want a boat named Herbert? After 13 years of attempting to make the perfect contraption, I thought he was it. I crafted a motor out of a milk carton and rubber band, and a sail out of a fork and plastic bag to catch all wind energy possible. I gave Herbert a fin to help guide him through the troubled waters. He had two water bottles as a base and one rock in each to keep him from flipping on the starting 10-foot drop. I coated him in duct tape to ensure he did not fall apart, and decorated him with Sharpies so that the other boats would pay attention to his perfection rather than the race at hand.

My 19 cousins, 14 aunts and uncles, and I have competed in this race during our weeklong family reunions every year since 2003. The uncles conceived the idea one day when the massive number of children wandering around needed some source of entertainment. The rules established that everyone must create a boat out of recycled material from the campsite and then drop their creation from a bridge into a creek; whoever’s boat made its way down the creek and into the lake first would win.

In 2003, as a 4-year-old, I decided to use a paper cup with a leaf and a stick stabbed into it. As soon as I catapulted this boat off the bridge, I learned that a leaf and stick do not make for a proper sail, that paper and water do not play well together, and that tape is most definitely a necessity. My other most valiant and slightly depressing efforts over the course of the next 12 years included a miniature water bottle taped into a paper cup, a bottle with a balloon attached to the end, and a Ziploc bag with a sail that was daintily taped to the top. Despite all these misses, I kept trying. As my cousins began to simply throw water bottles off the bridge to see whose would miraculously make it across the finish line, I never stopped attempting to create the perfect, winning boat. Throughout my life, I have loved experimenting and inventing, never stopping to think that one of my off-the-wall ideas was impossible. My mind works differently from others; when given the space, it generates multiple concepts and analyzes all of them to come up with the best solution. This race gave me my favorite type of freedom, complete liberty to use my wacky imagination to create anything in the world, and I loved every minute of it.

This freedom is what led me to Herbert. I had been thinking about him nonstop during the school year. I took into account all of my hits and misses of the past 13 years and began constructing him that fateful Tuesday morning. This was it. As every one of my cousins threw their plastic pieces as far as they possibly could, I carefully dropped Herbert from the bridge so that he would not land upside down in the water. I watched him drift down the creek, then ran to the lake entrance to await his arrival. After 20 minutes and multiple water bottles crossing the finish line, I discovered a branch had gotten in the way of our victory. Although a bit salty, I was not disappointed.

I had accomplished everything I wanted because I had done something I loved; I invented Herbert the masterpiece.

Family Heirlooms

Turning off a well-worn path, I step into the tall grass. Fighting my way through brambles and weeds, I ascend the hill. As the field comes into focus, my stomach sinks. What used to be neatly separated rows of edamame plants is now a jungle of weeds. Almost all evidence of my hard work under the scorching sun of rural Kentucky has disappeared. Johnson grass and pigweed have exploded and overpowered the edamame along with my dignity. The weeds have finally won the war. Why didn’t I take that job at the hardware store?

The fight lasted three months. My brother and I battled deer with fishing-line fences strung with aluminum cans but couldn’t keep them from devouring tender edamame seedlings. We squashed hundreds of metallic green Japanese beetles between our fingers as they feasted, turning the leaves lacy and transparent. Long hours of work and gallons of sweat had been poured into this crop. Our plan was to sell organic edamame to restaurants and make a ton of money. The few plants spared by the deer and beetles had now been defeated by the weeds. Knowing we were beaten, we mowed the field.

As we cleaned up, we noticed a few tomato plants left over from our church fundraiser. They were thriving with little care in the torrid climate of “Little Sahara,” the nickname my great-grandfather gave to this farm.

That winter, we researched the tomato market. We learned organic heirloom tomatoes command a much higher price than hybrid tomatoes grown with herbicides and pesticides. Even though growing heirlooms meant our tomatoes would not resemble the perfect spheres at Kroger and going organic meant more weeding, we decided to take the risk.

We built an electric fence to deter deer. Paper mulch and hoes were our weapons to combat weeds. We developed a system for supporting tomato vines and planted rows wider than our rototiller so it could pass safely. This time we were determined not to be beaten. By the end of July, our months of hard work were yielding results. We now faced a new challenge: selling. We sent out blast e-mails, put flyers in mailboxes, created a website, made business cards, and started cold-calling restaurants.

As I slowly punched in the phone number, pessimistic outcomes swirled in my mind. What if the chef has already contacted a tomato vendor? Will a restaurant trust a teenager? Despite my lack of confidence, I clicked the green call button and made my pitch. They weren’t interested. I got used to the rejections, but I kept calling.

Finally, we caught a break. “Stop by the restaurant, and we’ll look at what you have.” In 20 minutes we were standing in a sweltering kitchen. The cooks wore bandanas to keep sweat off their faces. We hoisted three overflowing crates of heirlooms onto the stainless-steel counter so the head chef could examine them. After he tasted a few cherry tomatoes, he nodded. He would buy them all.

My brother and I played it cool until we got in our car. Then we celebrated. A top chef wanted our tomatoes for his restaurant. It was exhilarating, even better than cashing the check. I’ll never forget him saying, “We’ll hit you guys up again next week.” From there, our business took off. Chefs were texting for more orders, and soon Jelsma Brothers tomatoes were featured on menus in gourmet restaurants across the city.

Many times I doubted my decision to turn off the well-worn path and start a new business. Working at the neighborhood hardware store certainly would have been easier. In retrospect, forging my own way was more satisfying than scoring a game-winning goal or nailing a saxophone audition. My reward has been confidence. Knowing I can take a risk, compete in the business world, and prevail.

FUELED BY MY PARENTS’ SACRIFICES

It is almost midnight when Papi comes through the door, gray hairs surrounding the creases that enveloped his face. He sets his Bible on the dining table and rummages the kitchen for food. His bones are so sore that he cannot even sit to eat. I hear him walking up the stairs, each step creaking under the pressure of his weight. I make my way to the kitchen to get a glass of water; the oven clock reads 1:32 a.m. In the darkness, his body is a shadow on the couch. “Bendicion, Papi,” I mutter and give him a kiss on the head. I pull a blanket over him; he squirms, but his eyes remain shut.

Since childhood, I have been engrossed in ensuring a prosperous future for myself and my family. My goal is to pay back my parents for all the hard work and sacrifice they encountered to ensure that I graduate high school and enroll in college. I can call myself accomplished the day I do not have to watch my father rush down a handful of pain pills before he leaves for work. The day I can guarantee that what they did was not in vain. That is how I will say thank you. My father’s ambition and my mother’s drive have instilled in me the values of hard work, dedication, and a sense of honor and a charge to give back to my family and community. My success so far did not happen because of my singular effort, rather, it took a village of teachers, advisers, and most importantly, mi familia. I will not let them down.

THE GREAT ESCAPE

But no one else knows about my crazy “walks,” as they are so unlike me. Most of the time I deal in concretefacts and figures in the fast-paced world of policy debate. You will find me hunched over my laptop squintingat the screen. Articles about the South China Sea conflict, Arctic environmental cooperation, and the benefits of granting China market economy status flash across my monitor. My brain is working in hyperdrive as I rush to find all the necessary articles, frantically type out robust explanations, and try to find ways to frame all of these facts perfectly. Debate is the pinnacle of objectivity; it values concrete facts over abstract dreams, every statement made has to be backed up by qualified sources, and every creative suggestion falls to the devastating question, “where’s your evidence?”

My role as a fact-driven policy debater may be at odds with the quirky imaginative daydreamer, but that’s me. I refuse to fit into any mold or stereotype. I love politics and history, but I am also intrigued by science fiction and fantasy. I am not one-dimensional. Tapping into my imagination while staying grounded in facts and figures helps me create something really special. While these qualities may seem like polar opposites, they work for me. Whether it’s saving the human race from evil aliens or debating a policy that elevates millions out of poverty, I can create a world where I truly shine. With creativity and objectivity in hand, I can “boldly go where no man has gone before.”

COFFEE BREAK

I watched the sun sink lazily below the horizon, spreading its colors over Hoan Kiem Lake, but rather than the beauty Dung had seen, I saw it as a pernicious clock, mocking me as my precious study time leaked away. Tons of homework, then a math test, then a psychology club meeting. Although I loved discussing profound psychological problems, or solving those enigmas called equations, the thought was tiring. “Another cup of coffee,” I thought sadly to myself, “another sleepless night.”

“Sure,” I told Dung, noncommittally, and tried to pedal faster while she made comments about every shop and restaurant that we passed. Nothing seemed to slip her eyes.

Suddenly, she stopped her bike. “Have a break? This shop makes great coffee.”

I smelled the Vietnamese coffee, a scent so tempting and intimate that it almost made me cry. I wanted nothing more than to have a cup of coffee with her — it had been so long since we’d really done anything together — but something stopped me. “Uh,” I found myself saying, mechanically. “I’ve got so much homework. I shouldn’t waste my time.”

She shrugged, and we continued in silence. As the smell of coffee receded farther and farther into the distance, I started feeling guilty and gained a new respect for Dung. She had the same amount of work that I had — as anybody had — but she had still happily made time for me. Back home, looking at the piles of homework on my desk, I sighed. Attending the most competitive “gifted” school in Vietnam — where parents dream of sending kids to and where kids feel forced to constantly justify their placement — we view high school as nothing more than preparation for college, and I suddenly became afraid that college would seem like nothing more than preparation for my career. “Perhaps Dung was the only one of us to get it right,” I told myself: There is beauty not to be missed, moments not to be ignored, and friends not to be abandoned.

“Hey, Dung,” I asked the following morning. “Do you want to ride from school together again today?”

“Your battery still not working?”

“No. I fixed it. I just wanted to have a cup of coffee with you.”

After school, two steaming cups of coffee in front of us, she told me how lonely she had been after her recent class transfer. I’d been lonely, too, I realized, too wrapped up in my studies and in my inner world. However, watching the sunset with my friend, I finally realized that taking an hour-long “vacation” from myschoolwork doesn’t mean I am escaping from it, and it doesn’t mean I’m lazy. All it means is that I want to live my life to the fullest and cherish what I now have while reaching for the future.

Returning home that afternoon, for the first time in months I didn’t feel tired. I finished my homework more productively than ever, got six full hours of sleep, and woke up the next morning refreshed, ready to conquer any tricky math questions or mysteries of the human brain. I sensed an overwhelming energy running through my body as I thought about how future is shaped by present, looking forward to seeing Dung again and to another day of school.

Welcome, Class of 2021!

Top ’21 Tidbits

86 international students

55 have parents or grandparents who attended Colgate

Farthest hometown: Melbourne, Australia (10,307 miles away!)

Collectively, they have lived more than 5.1 million days

774 first-years

30% self-identify as multicultural students

Citizens of 21 countries (including the United States)

From 40 states and the District of Columbia

13 came from Colorado

Colgate University Undergraduate College Application Essays

These Colgate University college application essays were written by students accepted at Colgate University. All of our sample college essays include the question prompt and the year written. Please use these sample admission essays responsibly.

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College Application Essays accepted by Colgate University

Future recommendation jon, colgate university.

To Whom It May Concern:

[full name] selected Colgate because he believed a large liberal arts college would allow him to explore many fields of study, while the strong community service program would afford unlimited opportunities to continue his...

Life Changing Experiences Jon

Helpless, the fuzzy, fat caterpillar floated in the creek near our house, wriggling bravely in a vain attempt to swim to shore. I took a stick, knelt down and extended it towards him. The caterpillar latched onto it eagerly, then hesitated a...

Ignoring Apples Brittany Adam

St. Augustine tells us, "It is not true to say that a thing rightly done once should not be changed." I know this is true because of my experience with my grandfather's failing health. My grandfather, Sinclair Adam, is a gentleman farmer in...

Watch Me Callie Adam

I'm sure I have the visiting team's attention by the time I finish my first lap around the soccer field. Standing in a circle, contemplating my presence, they venture guesses quietly, "Cross country? Lost? Girl's soccer?" Finishing my second lap,...

A New Life Konstantin Drabkin

I still remember it like it was yesterday. After seven days of grueling labor pushing my body to its limits, I was proudly walking - no, strutting. As my clean and pressed uniform held my new ribbons for the world to see, I looked up to the stands...

A Dream Benjamin Gordon

I had a dream last night that my most revered mentors came together to weave their unique threads into the fabric that ultimately became my Common Application essay.

Kurt Vonnegut, my favorite novelist, was in charge of the introduction to this...

The Butter Knife Sydney Schultz

My mother and I -- weary with travel, drained from a day of sightseeing, and armed with only a butter knife -- once dismantled a bathroom door in a Paris apartment. We were exhausted, having, in true Schultz family vacation style, walked about 10...

The Shadow Anonymous

Everyone thinks me strange because I love it all as though it were a person.

I love the quiet road named after my great-uncle Pintor Ruano as though it were my great-uncle himself; I love the old church like an old friend; I love the sound of its...

The Innocence of Child Anonymous

I stood there holding my stethoscope, listening to a five year-old child’s back, nervously searching for any abnormality, trying to control my nerves and focus on my work. I shifted my stethoscope to another spot, the sweat on my back now beading...

First, Sketchbook Anonymous

I gasped when I peeked into Christine’s sketchbook, a kaleidoscope of vibrant colors and eye-popping characters. Hoping to see more of her drawings, I eagerly tried to befriend her. Although Christine covered her sketchbook at first, she slowly...

My Hands Anonymous

My hair used to fall out because I thought I was strong, my heartbeat used to waver because I thought I was in control, and my hands used to shake because, for the first time, I thought I was beautiful.

My hands have done great things. I used my...

Climbing the Austrian Alps Anonymous

“No—No! Wrong place!” a European man shouted from his Hyundai window, pointing up the steep incline. We knew we hadn’t seen any other bikers for miles, but we were determined and ignored his admonition. The 35 pounds of equipment strapped to the...

Bittersweet Endings Anonymous

I have an affinity for magnificent endings. The final words of a novel, the last bite of a salted caramel chocolate bar, or the teetering crescendos of a timpani at the end of a grand symphony by Beethoven are just a few examples. When life...

Grit to withstand Adeline Vail Christianson

I’ve come to understand that when I choose a path in life, I’m bound to face some roadblocks along the way. I now see these hurdles not as impenetrable obstacles but instead as opportunities. I can appreciate the new direction they take me and the...

Behind the Lens Zoe Tierney

My favorite place in the world is behind the lens of a camera. When I was fourteen, I saved every penny I made babysitting and washing dishes for a Canon t2i, and the satisfaction that came with the overpowering smell of lens cleaner and the...

Photography Anonymous

A pair of tiny Mary-Janes and ruffled socks stirred anxiously in anticipation. Ms. Bush’s kindergarten classroom leered ominously over our small heads, making my friend Corinne’s knuckles whiten and eyes instinctively shoot downwards. My navy blue...

Strong-Willed, Introspective, Curious Anonymous

Three words that my best friend would use to describe me are strong-willed, introspective, and curious. Strong-willed is fitting because I know what I believe in and what is important to me. Anyone from my United States History class who saw my...

Dodo and Beans Anonymous

The sound turned the very marrow in my bones to ice: a six pound bag of olotun beans trickling onto a shallow plastic tray. I did not wait for my mother to instruct me to perform the ensuing task. I made reluctant haste to the kitchen where the...

My One-Student School Year Anonymous

I was twelve years old when I was told I could no longer attend school. My mother called me to the living room and, for perhaps the first time, I sensed fragility in the woman who devoted her resources unequivocally to the care of her two...

Colgate Personal Essay Anonymous

When the cool metal blade of the razor touched my scalp, I realized I had died. I watched with veiled eyes as my mother cut the last, straggling clumps of hair. The girl I glimpsed in the mirror afterwards was an apparition. If I puckered my lips...

Adventures to Critz Farms Anonymous

Rolling fields of sunflowers stretch to each horizon. Every step you take you can hear the crunch of dried leaves that have recently drifted off the branches hanging above your head. There is not an inch of landscape that does not exude red,...

The Summer I Matured... Kind Of Shanti Anuradha Boyle

Falling asleep in class is never a good idea, especially when the teacher is your 86-year-old grandfather and the classroom is his bedroom. How did I get roped into giving up my limited, beautiful summer days for a fluorescent monitor and fourteen...

Piece by Piece Anonymous

“OK… I’m not sure that was supposed to happen.”

My co-worker Greg and I both regarded the bike shock that now lay in two parts on the shop floor in a puddle of hydraulic fluid. The bike itself hung from the work stand, looking disconcertingly like...

Building a Considerate City: Advocating for Mental Health and Homeless Solutions in Los Angeles nevaeh gutierrez

The notion of family in my Latino community is one that is extremely fluid, with the expectation that we treat others with respect. Albert, my “neighbor,” has occupied the bush in front of my house for over two years and has become a part of my...

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Colgate University’s 2023-24 Essay Prompts

Diversity short response.

On Colgate’s campus, students engage with individuals from a variety of socioeconomic backgrounds, races, ethnicities, religions, and perspectives during the course of their educational and social experiences. In 200-250 words, please share the benefits you see in engaging with a diverse body of students, faculty, and staff as part of your Colgate experience.

Why This College Short Response

Colgate students immerse themselves in social and intellectual pursuits that inspire them. Tell us in 200-250 words what inspires you and why you want to pursue that at Colgate.

Select-A-Prompt Short Response

Please complete the following so we can learn a bit more about you. Each response should be no more than 13 words.

I am fascinated by…

My favorite book, movie, or television show is…

My role model is…

In the future, I hope to …

One historical figure I would like to meet is…

My favorite food is…

One thing I would change is…

I am most challenged by…

My favorite place is…

I am drawn to Colgate University because…

Common App Personal Essay

The essay demonstrates your ability to write clearly and concisely on a selected topic and helps you distinguish yourself in your own voice. What do you want the readers of your application to know about you apart from courses, grades, and test scores? Choose the option that best helps you answer that question and write an essay of no more than 650 words, using the prompt to inspire and structure your response. Remember: 650 words is your limit, not your goal. Use the full range if you need it, but don‘t feel obligated to do so.

Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story.

The lessons we take from obstacles we encounter can be fundamental to later success. Recount a time when you faced a challenge, setback, or failure. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience?

Reflect on a time when you questioned or challenged a belief or idea. What prompted your thinking? What was the outcome?

Reflect on something that someone has done for you that has made you happy or thankful in a surprising way. How has this gratitude affected or motivated you?

Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others.

Describe a topic, idea, or concept you find so engaging that it makes you lose all track of time. Why does it captivate you? What or who do you turn to when you want to learn more?

Share an essay on any topic of your choice. It can be one you‘ve already written, one that responds to a different prompt, or one of your own design.

What will first-time readers think of your college essay?

Colgate University 2022-23 Supplemental Essay Prompt Guide

Regular Decision Deadline: Jan 15

You Have: 

Colgate University 2022-23 Application Essay Question Explanations

The Requirements: 2 essays of 150-200 words, 1 list

Supplemental Essay Type(s): Oddball , Community

Colgate offers applicants the opportunity to lend depth to their application through optional supplemental writing prompts. These prompts are not meant to feel like essays; they are simply an added perspective. Responses to these prompts provide the Admission team greater insight into who the applicants are and the many ways they may flourish at Colgate.

Applicants can choose to respond to any or all of the prompts, which will be available in their Colgate applicant portal after their application has been received. Applicants should submit responses to the optional supplemental prompts based on personal preference. Those who choose not to submit responses will be at no disadvantage in the application review process.

Question 1: A great institution is diverse. It brings students of different socioeconomic backgrounds, races, ethnicities, and religions to campus. Colgate recognizes this and exposes students to a rich variety of perspectives and backgrounds in their educational and social experiences. Tell us in 150-200 words how you have prepared to immerse yourself in a community such as this or how you look forward to growing as a result of your experience at Colgate.

Admissions wants to know that you value inclusivity and thrive in diverse settings. So, you have two options: Tell admissions a story about getting involved in a diverse community, or write about why you are excited about joining Colgate’s eclectic student body. If you go with a story, start by thinking about the experiences you’ve had that have drawn you out of your shell or comfort zone and introduced you to new concepts, ideas, or ways of living. Maybe you joined the Robotics Club at school and made friends with peers you would have never met otherwise. Perhaps you got involved with the debate team and had to learn quickly about effective communication and the ability to see things from different perspectives. If you’ve lived a pretty sheltered life up until this point, don’t feel overwhelmed by this question — instead of looking to your past, focus on your future. How do you hope to blossom as a result of your experience at Colgate? Are you looking forward to leaving your small Midwestern town and meeting people from all different backgrounds? Do you hope to gain perspective and expand your horizons? However you approach this prompt, we encourage you to focus on how joining a diverse community will benefit your education.

Question 2: Colgate cultivates a skilled and engaged student body. Through their achievements, our students reflect the University’s reputation as a great place to pursue one’s academic interests. Tell us in 150-200 words about an academic or personal experience that highlights your skill and potential as a Colgate student.

Colgate wants to accept motivated applicants who are keen to take advantage of the opportunities available to them on campus. So, use this response as an opportunity to tell admissions about a time you accomplished a goal or succeeded academically. Maybe you created a graphic design club at your school to further develop your skills with friends after classes were over. Are you a natural leader? Do you often think outside the box? Perhaps you won your school’s science fair and plan to continue thinking creatively about solutions to 21st century problems next year on campus. Are you innovative? Do you love a good challenge? If nothing immediately comes to mind, try jotting down the academic accomplishments you’re most proud of. If you can’t think of anything, try asking a family member or loved one — we’re sure grandma has an idea or two! 😉

Question 3: The academic community at Colgate is shaped by the unique talents, character, and personality of each student. Please finish each sentence in 75 characters or less so we can learn more about you.

I am fascinated by… i want to learn all i can about… my favorite book is… my role model is… in the future, i hope to … one thing i would change is… i wish… i am most challenged by… in 5 years, i….

You’ve been limited to less than the length of a tweet for each answer, so you’d better make every word (and character) count! No pressure or anything. These prompts don’t have time for generalities or gentle introductions, so you’ll have to get straight to the point. The more specific your words are, the more likely they are to stick with admissions officers. If you can paint a funny picture or display a knack for wit, take this chance, but don’t force it; humor is not the only way to leave an impression. You also don’t have to think of this as filling in the blanks, but more like filling in any blanks still left in your application. Anything that doesn’t feel like it merits a full essay can go here as a tweet, hot take, punchline, or elegantly-worded sentence.

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Explore 231 College Essay Examples

Join the Essays That Worked community and get access to our entire database of 231 essay examples from admitted students.

Here is the full database of college essay examples with expert analysis.

1. Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your stor...

Rica nu stia sa zica rau, ratusca, ramurica. I stared at the cracked ceiling of my bedroom in Romania, repeating the eight words under my breath. Rica nu stia sa zica rau, ratusca, ramurica. More than anything, I wanted to roll my r's, to speak Roman...

Tell us why you decided to apply to the University of Wisconsin-Madison. In addition, please include why you are interested in studying the major(s) you have selected. If you selected undecided please...

The only thing I associated with both Wisconsin the state and Wisconsin the university was cheese. For some irrational reason, I believed our campus tour would include shrines to cheese, statues of cheese, and endless cheese boutiques (is there such...

Chubby fingers outstretched and round cheeks flattened against the window, I leaned further into the plexiglass. Although I could feel a firm hand tugging at my shirt, urging me to sit back in my seat - at ten, I possessed little concept of manners...

Blue blanket in one hand, cookie monster in the other, I stumbled down the steps to fill my sippy cup with coffee. My diplomatic self gulped down his caffeine while admiring his Harry Potter wands. My father and I watched the sunrise through...

People love to ask why. Why do you wear a turban? Why do you have long hair? Why are you playing a guitar with only 3 strings and watching TV at 3 A.M.—where did you get that cat? Why won’t you go back to your country, you terrorist? My answer is…unc...

The three, small, purple seeds sat on the brown soil. Ten feet from me I could see my grandpa with his yunta and donkeys. They were in unison: the two donkeys, the plow, and him. My grandpa commanded; the donkeys obeyed. I began to feel tired. Exhaus...

7. Share an essay on any topic of your choice. It can be one you've already written, one that responds to a different prompt, or one of your own design.

Sliding the scottie dog across “Go!” past Boardwalk and Park Place, I immediately exhale. I am safe for another round; far more importantly, though, my younger brothers have not surpassed me.

After passing by the weekend of “GO,” I begin the next lap...

2. The lessons we take from obstacles we encounter can be fundamental to later success. Recount a time when you faced a challenge, setback, or failure. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from...

His eyes stared back at me with contentment. Neither he nor I, the baby girl on his lap, are smiling, but there is a sense of peace, of quiet happiness about us. I hold his wrist in one hand, my other grasping a bottle of ketchup. He holds my tiny le...

Please describe why you are interested in attending Tulane University (optional).

Tulane University has a unique history, deeply established in the city it calls home, New Orleans. After transitioning from a medical school to a full college in in 1847, then undergoing a name change from the University of Louisiana to Tulane in 188...

6. Describe a topic, idea, or concept you find so engaging that it makes you lose all track of time. Why does it captivate you? What or who do you turn to when you want to learn more?

I spent much of my childhood watching movies. I became absolutely engrossed in many different films, TV shows, and animations. From the movie theatres to the TV, I spent my hours enjoying the beauty of visual media. One place that was special to me w...

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Choose Your Test

Sat / act prep online guides and tips, 177 college essay examples for 11 schools + expert analysis.

College Admissions , College Essays

The personal statement might just be the hardest part of your college application. Mostly this is because it has the least guidance and is the most open-ended. One way to understand what colleges are looking for when they ask you to write an essay is to check out the essays of students who already got in—college essays that actually worked. After all, they must be among the most successful of this weird literary genre.

In this article, I'll go through general guidelines for what makes great college essays great. I've also compiled an enormous list of 100+ actual sample college essays from 11 different schools. Finally, I'll break down two of these published college essay examples and explain why and how they work. With links to 177 full essays and essay excerpts , this article is a great resource for learning how to craft your own personal college admissions essay!

What Excellent College Essays Have in Common

Even though in many ways these sample college essays are very different from one other, they do share some traits you should try to emulate as you write your own essay.

Visible Signs of Planning

Building out from a narrow, concrete focus. You'll see a similar structure in many of the essays. The author starts with a very detailed story of an event or description of a person or place. After this sense-heavy imagery, the essay expands out to make a broader point about the author, and connects this very memorable experience to the author's present situation, state of mind, newfound understanding, or maturity level.

Knowing how to tell a story. Some of the experiences in these essays are one-of-a-kind. But most deal with the stuff of everyday life. What sets them apart is the way the author approaches the topic: analyzing it for drama and humor, for its moving qualities, for what it says about the author's world, and for how it connects to the author's emotional life.

Stellar Execution

A killer first sentence. You've heard it before, and you'll hear it again: you have to suck the reader in, and the best place to do that is the first sentence. Great first sentences are punchy. They are like cliffhangers, setting up an exciting scene or an unusual situation with an unclear conclusion, in order to make the reader want to know more. Don't take my word for it—check out these 22 first sentences from Stanford applicants and tell me you don't want to read the rest of those essays to find out what happens!

A lively, individual voice. Writing is for readers. In this case, your reader is an admissions officer who has read thousands of essays before yours and will read thousands after. Your goal? Don't bore your reader. Use interesting descriptions, stay away from clichés, include your own offbeat observations—anything that makes this essay sounds like you and not like anyone else.

Technical correctness. No spelling mistakes, no grammar weirdness, no syntax issues, no punctuation snafus—each of these sample college essays has been formatted and proofread perfectly. If this kind of exactness is not your strong suit, you're in luck! All colleges advise applicants to have their essays looked over several times by parents, teachers, mentors, and anyone else who can spot a comma splice. Your essay must be your own work, but there is absolutely nothing wrong with getting help polishing it.

And if you need more guidance, connect with PrepScholar's expert admissions consultants . These expert writers know exactly what college admissions committees look for in an admissions essay and chan help you craft an essay that boosts your chances of getting into your dream school.

Check out PrepScholar's Essay Editing and Coaching progra m for more details!

Links to Full College Essay Examples

Some colleges publish a selection of their favorite accepted college essays that worked, and I've put together a selection of over 100 of these.

Common App Essay Samples

Please note that some of these college essay examples may be responding to prompts that are no longer in use. The current Common App prompts are as follows:

1. Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story. 2. The lessons we take from obstacles we encounter can be fundamental to later success. Recount a time when you faced a challenge, setback, or failure. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience? 3. Reflect on a time when you questioned or challenged a belief or idea. What prompted your thinking? What was the outcome? 4. Reflect on something that someone has done for you that has made you happy or thankful in a surprising way. How has this gratitude affected or motivated you? 5. Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others. 6. Describe a topic, idea, or concept you find so engaging that it makes you lose all track of time. Why does it captivate you? What or who do you turn to when you want to learn more?

7. Share an essay on any topic of your choice. It can be one you've already written, one that responds to a different prompt, or one of your own design.

Now, let's get to the good stuff: the list of 177 college essay examples responding to current and past Common App essay prompts. 

Connecticut college.

• 12 Common Application essays from the classes of 2022-2025

Hamilton College

• 7 Common Application essays from the class of 2026
• 7 Common Application essays from the class of 2022
• 7 Common Application essays from the class of 2018
• 8 Common Application essays from the class of 2012
• 8 Common Application essays from the class of 2007

Johns Hopkins

These essays are answers to past prompts from either the Common Application or the Coalition Application (which Johns Hopkins used to accept).

• 1 Common Application or Coalition Application essay from the class of 2026
• 6 Common Application or Coalition Application essays from the class of 2025
• 6 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2024
• 6 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2023
• 7 Common Application of Universal Application essays from the class of 2022
• 5 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2021
• 7 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2020

Essay Examples Published by Other Websites

• 2 Common Application essays ( 1st essay , 2nd essay ) from applicants admitted to Columbia

Other Sample College Essays

Here is a collection of essays that are college-specific.

Babson College

• 4 essays (and 1 video response) on "Why Babson" from the class of 2020

Emory University

• 5 essay examples ( 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 ) from the class of 2020 along with analysis from Emory admissions staff on why the essays were exceptional
• 5 more recent essay examples ( 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 ) along with analysis from Emory admissions staff on what made these essays stand out

University of Georgia

• 1 “strong essay” sample from 2019
• 1 “strong essay” sample from 2018
• 10 Harvard essays from 2023
• 10 Harvard essays from 2022
• 10 Harvard essays from 2021
• 10 Harvard essays from 2020
• 10 Harvard essays from 2019
• 10 Harvard essays from 2018
• 6 essays from admitted MIT students

Smith College

• 6 "best gift" essays from the class of 2018

Books of College Essays

If you're looking for even more sample college essays, consider purchasing a college essay book. The best of these include dozens of essays that worked and feedback from real admissions officers.

College Essays That Made a Difference —This detailed guide from Princeton Review includes not only successful essays, but also interviews with admissions officers and full student profiles.

50 Successful Harvard Application Essays by the Staff of the Harvard Crimson—A must for anyone aspiring to Harvard .

50 Successful Ivy League Application Essays and 50 Successful Stanford Application Essays by Gen and Kelly Tanabe—For essays from other top schools, check out this venerated series, which is regularly updated with new essays.

Heavenly Essays by Janine W. Robinson—This collection from the popular blogger behind Essay Hell includes a wider range of schools, as well as helpful tips on honing your own essay.

Analyzing Great Common App Essays That Worked

I've picked two essays from the examples collected above to examine in more depth so that you can see exactly what makes a successful college essay work. Full credit for these essays goes to the original authors and the schools that published them.

Example 1: "Breaking Into Cars," by Stephen, Johns Hopkins Class of '19 (Common App Essay, 636 words long)

I had never broken into a car before.

We were in Laredo, having just finished our first day at a Habitat for Humanity work site. The Hotchkiss volunteers had already left, off to enjoy some Texas BBQ, leaving me behind with the college kids to clean up. Not until we were stranded did we realize we were locked out of the van.

Someone picked a coat hanger out of the dumpster, handed it to me, and took a few steps back.

"Can you do that thing with a coat hanger to unlock it?"

"Why me?" I thought.

More out of amusement than optimism, I gave it a try. I slid the hanger into the window's seal like I'd seen on crime shows, and spent a few minutes jiggling the apparatus around the inside of the frame. Suddenly, two things simultaneously clicked. One was the lock on the door. (I actually succeeded in springing it.) The other was the realization that I'd been in this type of situation before. In fact, I'd been born into this type of situation.

My upbringing has numbed me to unpredictability and chaos. With a family of seven, my home was loud, messy, and spottily supervised. My siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing—all meant my house was functioning normally. My Dad, a retired Navy pilot, was away half the time. When he was home, he had a parenting style something like a drill sergeant. At the age of nine, I learned how to clear burning oil from the surface of water. My Dad considered this a critical life skill—you know, in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed. "The water's on fire! Clear a hole!" he shouted, tossing me in the lake without warning. While I'm still unconvinced about that particular lesson's practicality, my Dad's overarching message is unequivocally true: much of life is unexpected, and you have to deal with the twists and turns.

Living in my family, days rarely unfolded as planned. A bit overlooked, a little pushed around, I learned to roll with reality, negotiate a quick deal, and give the improbable a try. I don't sweat the small stuff, and I definitely don't expect perfect fairness. So what if our dining room table only has six chairs for seven people? Someone learns the importance of punctuality every night.

But more than punctuality and a special affinity for musical chairs, my family life has taught me to thrive in situations over which I have no power. Growing up, I never controlled my older siblings, but I learned how to thwart their attempts to control me. I forged alliances, and realigned them as necessary. Sometimes, I was the poor, defenseless little brother; sometimes I was the omniscient elder. Different things to different people, as the situation demanded. I learned to adapt.

Back then, these techniques were merely reactions undertaken to ensure my survival. But one day this fall, Dr. Hicks, our Head of School, asked me a question that he hoped all seniors would reflect on throughout the year: "How can I participate in a thing I do not govern, in the company of people I did not choose?"

The question caught me off guard, much like the question posed to me in Laredo. Then, I realized I knew the answer. I knew why the coat hanger had been handed to me.

Growing up as the middle child in my family, I was a vital participant in a thing I did not govern, in the company of people I did not choose. It's family. It's society. And often, it's chaos. You participate by letting go of the small stuff, not expecting order and perfection, and facing the unexpected with confidence, optimism, and preparedness. My family experience taught me to face a serendipitous world with confidence.

What Makes This Essay Tick?

It's very helpful to take writing apart in order to see just how it accomplishes its objectives. Stephen's essay is very effective. Let's find out why!

An Opening Line That Draws You In

In just eight words, we get: scene-setting (he is standing next to a car about to break in), the idea of crossing a boundary (he is maybe about to do an illegal thing for the first time), and a cliffhanger (we are thinking: is he going to get caught? Is he headed for a life of crime? Is he about to be scared straight?).

Great, Detailed Opening Story

More out of amusement than optimism, I gave it a try. I slid the hanger into the window's seal like I'd seen on crime shows, and spent a few minutes jiggling the apparatus around the inside of the frame.

It's the details that really make this small experience come alive. Notice how whenever he can, Stephen uses a more specific, descriptive word in place of a more generic one. The volunteers aren't going to get food or dinner; they're going for "Texas BBQ." The coat hanger comes from "a dumpster." Stephen doesn't just move the coat hanger—he "jiggles" it.

Details also help us visualize the emotions of the people in the scene. The person who hands Stephen the coat hanger isn't just uncomfortable or nervous; he "takes a few steps back"—a description of movement that conveys feelings. Finally, the detail of actual speech makes the scene pop. Instead of writing that the other guy asked him to unlock the van, Stephen has the guy actually say his own words in a way that sounds like a teenager talking.

Turning a Specific Incident Into a Deeper Insight

Suddenly, two things simultaneously clicked. One was the lock on the door. (I actually succeeded in springing it.) The other was the realization that I'd been in this type of situation before. In fact, I'd been born into this type of situation.

Stephen makes the locked car experience a meaningful illustration of how he has learned to be resourceful and ready for anything, and he also makes this turn from the specific to the broad through an elegant play on the two meanings of the word "click."

Using Concrete Examples When Making Abstract Claims

My upbringing has numbed me to unpredictability and chaos. With a family of seven, my home was loud, messy, and spottily supervised. My siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing—all meant my house was functioning normally.

"Unpredictability and chaos" are very abstract, not easily visualized concepts. They could also mean any number of things—violence, abandonment, poverty, mental instability. By instantly following up with highly finite and unambiguous illustrations like "family of seven" and "siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing," Stephen grounds the abstraction in something that is easy to picture: a large, noisy family.

Using Small Bits of Humor and Casual Word Choice

My Dad, a retired Navy pilot, was away half the time. When he was home, he had a parenting style something like a drill sergeant. At the age of nine, I learned how to clear burning oil from the surface of water. My Dad considered this a critical life skill—you know, in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed.

Obviously, knowing how to clean burning oil is not high on the list of things every 9-year-old needs to know. To emphasize this, Stephen uses sarcasm by bringing up a situation that is clearly over-the-top: "in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed."

The humor also feels relaxed. Part of this is because he introduces it with the colloquial phrase "you know," so it sounds like he is talking to us in person. This approach also diffuses the potential discomfort of the reader with his father's strictness—since he is making jokes about it, clearly he is OK. Notice, though, that this doesn't occur very much in the essay. This helps keep the tone meaningful and serious rather than flippant.

An Ending That Stretches the Insight Into the Future

But one day this fall, Dr. Hicks, our Head of School, asked me a question that he hoped all seniors would reflect on throughout the year: "How can I participate in a thing I do not govern, in the company of people I did not choose?"

The ending of the essay reveals that Stephen's life has been one long preparation for the future. He has emerged from chaos and his dad's approach to parenting as a person who can thrive in a world that he can't control.

This connection of past experience to current maturity and self-knowledge is a key element in all successful personal essays. Colleges are very much looking for mature, self-aware applicants. These are the qualities of successful college students, who will be able to navigate the independence college classes require and the responsibility and quasi-adulthood of college life.

What Could This Essay Do Even Better?

Even the best essays aren't perfect, and even the world's greatest writers will tell you that writing is never "finished"—just "due." So what would we tweak in this essay if we could?

Replace some of the clichéd language. Stephen uses handy phrases like "twists and turns" and "don't sweat the small stuff" as a kind of shorthand for explaining his relationship to chaos and unpredictability. But using too many of these ready-made expressions runs the risk of clouding out your own voice and replacing it with something expected and boring.

Use another example from recent life. Stephen's first example (breaking into the van in Laredo) is a great illustration of being resourceful in an unexpected situation. But his essay also emphasizes that he "learned to adapt" by being "different things to different people." It would be great to see how this plays out outside his family, either in the situation in Laredo or another context.

Example 2: By Renner Kwittken, Tufts Class of '23 (Common App Essay, 645 words long)

My first dream job was to be a pickle truck driver. I saw it in my favorite book, Richard Scarry's "Cars and Trucks and Things That Go," and for some reason, I was absolutely obsessed with the idea of driving a giant pickle. Much to the discontent of my younger sister, I insisted that my parents read us that book as many nights as possible so we could find goldbug, a small little golden bug, on every page. I would imagine the wonderful life I would have: being a pig driving a giant pickle truck across the country, chasing and finding goldbug. I then moved on to wanting to be a Lego Master. Then an architect. Then a surgeon.

Then I discovered a real goldbug: gold nanoparticles that can reprogram macrophages to assist in killing tumors, produce clear images of them without sacrificing the subject, and heat them to obliteration.

Suddenly the destination of my pickle was clear.

I quickly became enveloped by the world of nanomedicine; I scoured articles about liposomes, polymeric micelles, dendrimers, targeting ligands, and self-assembling nanoparticles, all conquering cancer in some exotic way. Completely absorbed, I set out to find a mentor to dive even deeper into these topics. After several rejections, I was immensely grateful to receive an invitation to work alongside Dr. Sangeeta Ray at Johns Hopkins.

In the lab, Dr. Ray encouraged a great amount of autonomy to design and implement my own procedures. I chose to attack a problem that affects the entire field of nanomedicine: nanoparticles consistently fail to translate from animal studies into clinical trials. Jumping off recent literature, I set out to see if a pre-dose of a common chemotherapeutic could enhance nanoparticle delivery in aggressive prostate cancer, creating three novel constructs based on three different linear polymers, each using fluorescent dye (although no gold, sorry goldbug!). Though using radioactive isotopes like Gallium and Yttrium would have been incredible, as a 17-year-old, I unfortunately wasn't allowed in the same room as these radioactive materials (even though I took a Geiger counter to a pair of shoes and found them to be slightly dangerous).

I hadn't expected my hypothesis to work, as the research project would have ideally been led across two full years. Yet while there are still many optimizations and revisions to be done, I was thrilled to find -- with completely new nanoparticles that may one day mean future trials will use particles with the initials "RK-1" -- thatcyclophosphamide did indeed increase nanoparticle delivery to the tumor in a statistically significant way.

A secondary, unexpected research project was living alone in Baltimore, a new city to me, surrounded by people much older than I. Even with moving frequently between hotels, AirBnB's, and students' apartments, I strangely reveled in the freedom I had to enjoy my surroundings and form new friendships with graduate school students from the lab. We explored The Inner Harbor at night, attended a concert together one weekend, and even got to watch the Orioles lose (to nobody's surprise). Ironically, it's through these new friendships I discovered something unexpected: what I truly love is sharing research. Whether in a presentation or in a casual conversation, making others interested in science is perhaps more exciting to me than the research itself. This solidified a new pursuit to angle my love for writing towards illuminating science in ways people can understand, adding value to a society that can certainly benefit from more scientific literacy.

It seems fitting that my goals are still transforming: in Scarry's book, there is not just one goldbug, there is one on every page. With each new experience, I'm learning that it isn't the goldbug itself, but rather the act of searching for the goldbugs that will encourage, shape, and refine my ever-evolving passions. Regardless of the goldbug I seek -- I know my pickle truck has just begun its journey.

Renner takes a somewhat different approach than Stephen, but their essay is just as detailed and engaging. Let's go through some of the strengths of this essay.

One Clear Governing Metaphor

This essay is ultimately about two things: Renner’s dreams and future career goals, and Renner’s philosophy on goal-setting and achieving one’s dreams.

But instead of listing off all the amazing things they’ve done to pursue their dream of working in nanomedicine, Renner tells a powerful, unique story instead. To set up the narrative, Renner opens the essay by connecting their experiences with goal-setting and dream-chasing all the way back to a memorable childhood experience:

This lighthearted–but relevant!--story about the moment when Renner first developed a passion for a specific career (“finding the goldbug”) provides an anchor point for the rest of the essay. As Renner pivots to describing their current dreams and goals–working in nanomedicine–the metaphor of “finding the goldbug” is reflected in Renner’s experiments, rejections, and new discoveries.

Though Renner tells multiple stories about their quest to “find the goldbug,” or, in other words, pursue their passion, each story is connected by a unifying theme; namely, that as we search and grow over time, our goals will transform…and that’s okay! By the end of the essay, Renner uses the metaphor of “finding the goldbug” to reiterate the relevance of the opening story:

While the earlier parts of the essay convey Renner’s core message by showing, the final, concluding paragraph sums up Renner’s insights by telling. By briefly and clearly stating the relevance of the goldbug metaphor to their own philosophy on goals and dreams, Renner demonstrates their creativity, insight, and eagerness to grow and evolve as the journey continues into college.

An Engaging, Individual Voice

This essay uses many techniques that make Renner sound genuine and make the reader feel like we already know them.

Technique #1: humor. Notice Renner's gentle and relaxed humor that lightly mocks their younger self's grand ambitions (this is different from the more sarcastic kind of humor used by Stephen in the first essay—you could never mistake one writer for the other).

My first dream job was to be a pickle truck driver.

I would imagine the wonderful life I would have: being a pig driving a giant pickle truck across the country, chasing and finding goldbug. I then moved on to wanting to be a Lego Master. Then an architect. Then a surgeon.

Renner gives a great example of how to use humor to your advantage in college essays. You don’t want to come off as too self-deprecating or sarcastic, but telling a lightheartedly humorous story about your younger self that also showcases how you’ve grown and changed over time can set the right tone for your entire essay.

Technique #2: intentional, eye-catching structure. The second technique is the way Renner uses a unique structure to bolster the tone and themes of their essay . The structure of your essay can have a major impact on how your ideas come across…so it’s important to give it just as much thought as the content of your essay!

For instance, Renner does a great job of using one-line paragraphs to create dramatic emphasis and to make clear transitions from one phase of the story to the next:

Suddenly the destination of my pickle car was clear.

Not only does the one-liner above signal that Renner is moving into a new phase of the narrative (their nanoparticle research experiences), it also tells the reader that this is a big moment in Renner’s story. It’s clear that Renner made a major discovery that changed the course of their goal pursuit and dream-chasing. Through structure, Renner conveys excitement and entices the reader to keep pushing forward to the next part of the story.

Technique #3: playing with syntax. The third technique is to use sentences of varying length, syntax, and structure. Most of the essay's written in standard English and uses grammatically correct sentences. However, at key moments, Renner emphasizes that the reader needs to sit up and pay attention by switching to short, colloquial, differently punctuated, and sometimes fragmented sentences.

Even with moving frequently between hotels, AirBnB's, and students' apartments, I strangely reveled in the freedom I had to enjoy my surroundings and form new friendships with graduate school students from the lab. We explored The Inner Harbor at night, attended a concert together one weekend, and even got to watch the Orioles lose (to nobody's surprise). Ironically, it's through these new friendships I discovered something unexpected: what I truly love is sharing research.

In the examples above, Renner switches adeptly between long, flowing sentences and quippy, telegraphic ones. At the same time, Renner uses these different sentence lengths intentionally. As they describe their experiences in new places, they use longer sentences to immerse the reader in the sights, smells, and sounds of those experiences. And when it’s time to get a big, key idea across, Renner switches to a short, punchy sentence to stop the reader in their tracks.

The varying syntax and sentence lengths pull the reader into the narrative and set up crucial “aha” moments when it’s most important…which is a surefire way to make any college essay stand out.

Renner's essay is very strong, but there are still a few little things that could be improved.

Connecting the research experiences to the theme of “finding the goldbug.”  The essay begins and ends with Renner’s connection to the idea of “finding the goldbug.” And while this metaphor is deftly tied into the essay’s intro and conclusion, it isn’t entirely clear what Renner’s big findings were during the research experiences that are described in the middle of the essay. It would be great to add a sentence or two stating what Renner’s big takeaways (or “goldbugs”) were from these experiences, which add more cohesion to the essay as a whole.

Give more details about discovering the world of nanomedicine. It makes sense that Renner wants to get into the details of their big research experiences as quickly as possible. After all, these are the details that show Renner’s dedication to nanomedicine! But a smoother transition from the opening pickle car/goldbug story to Renner’s “real goldbug” of nanoparticles would help the reader understand why nanoparticles became Renner’s goldbug. Finding out why Renner is so motivated to study nanomedicine–and perhaps what put them on to this field of study–would help readers fully understand why Renner chose this path in the first place.

4 Essential Tips for Writing Your Own Essay

How can you use this discussion to better your own college essay? Here are some suggestions for ways to use this resource effectively.

#1: Get Help From the Experts

Getting your college applications together takes a lot of work and can be pretty intimidatin g. Essays are even more important than ever now that admissions processes are changing and schools are going test-optional and removing diversity standards thanks to new Supreme Court rulings .  If you want certified expert help that really makes a difference, get started with  PrepScholar’s Essay Editing and Coaching program. Our program can help you put together an incredible essay from idea to completion so that your application stands out from the crowd. We've helped students get into the best colleges in the United States, including Harvard, Stanford, and Yale.  If you're ready to take the next step and boost your odds of getting into your dream school, connect with our experts today .

#2: Read Other Essays to Get Ideas for Your Own

As you go through the essays we've compiled for you above, ask yourself the following questions:

• Can you explain to yourself (or someone else!) why the opening sentence works well?
• Look for the essay's detailed personal anecdote. What senses is the author describing? Can you easily picture the scene in your mind's eye?
• Find the place where this anecdote bridges into a larger insight about the author. How does the essay connect the two? How does the anecdote work as an example of the author's characteristic, trait, or skill?
• Check out the essay's tone. If it's funny, can you find the places where the humor comes from? If it's sad and moving, can you find the imagery and description of feelings that make you moved? If it's serious, can you see how word choice adds to this tone?

Make a note whenever you find an essay or part of an essay that you think was particularly well-written, and think about what you like about it . Is it funny? Does it help you really get to know the writer? Does it show what makes the writer unique? Once you have your list, keep it next to you while writing your essay to remind yourself to try and use those same techniques in your own essay.

#3: Find Your "A-Ha!" Moment

All of these essays rely on connecting with the reader through a heartfelt, highly descriptive scene from the author's life. It can either be very dramatic (did you survive a plane crash?) or it can be completely mundane (did you finally beat your dad at Scrabble?). Either way, it should be personal and revealing about you, your personality, and the way you are now that you are entering the adult world.

Check out essays by authors like John Jeremiah Sullivan , Leslie Jamison , Hanif Abdurraqib , and Esmé Weijun Wang to get more examples of how to craft a compelling personal narrative.

#4: Start Early, Revise Often

Let me level with you: the best writing isn't writing at all. It's rewriting. And in order to have time to rewrite, you have to start way before the application deadline. My advice is to write your first draft at least two months before your applications are due.

Let it sit for a few days untouched. Then come back to it with fresh eyes and think critically about what you've written. What's extra? What's missing? What is in the wrong place? What doesn't make sense? Don't be afraid to take it apart and rearrange sections. Do this several times over, and your essay will be much better for it!

For more editing tips, check out a style guide like Dreyer's English or Eats, Shoots & Leaves .

What's Next?

Still not sure which colleges you want to apply to? Our experts will show you how to make a college list that will help you choose a college that's right for you.

Interested in learning more about college essays? Check out our detailed breakdown of exactly how personal statements work in an application , some suggestions on what to avoid when writing your essay , and our guide to writing about your extracurricular activities .

Working on the rest of your application? Read what admissions officers wish applicants knew before applying .

The recommendations in this post are based solely on our knowledge and experience. If you purchase an item through one of our links PrepScholar may receive a commission.

Anna scored in the 99th percentile on her SATs in high school, and went on to major in English at Princeton and to get her doctorate in English Literature at Columbia. She is passionate about improving student access to higher education.

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How to Write Colgate University’s 2016-2017 Essays

Located in the small town of Hamilton, New York, Colgate University is a top liberal arts college that balances strong academics with exciting extracurricular and social opportunities. Known for its fantastic liberal arts curriculum, Colgate boasts 54 undergraduate concentrations and a stellar faculty committed to providing an undergraduate population of approximately 2,927 students with a top-tier education.

Colgate University also offers spectacular off-campus academic experiences: Roughly two-thirds of students choose to study abroad. This is facilitated in part by the school’s unique offerings of study groups, that allow students to “study off campus for a semester while immersing them in new cultures, perspectives, and experiences.” Each study group is focused on a specific academic subject, and the university offers groups located across the United States and around the globe.

Colgate University also allows students the opportunity to take classes at the nearby Hamilton College, another top-tier liberal arts school. Colgate also has a core curriculum program, which is “recognized as one of the most ambitious and elegant general education programs in the country.” By their sophomore year, students are expected to take the four core classes: Legacies of the Ancient World, Challenges of Modernity, Communities and Identities, and Scientific Perspectives of the World.

In addition to the core curriculum, students must take one of the “Global Engagements” designated classes, which focus on the impact of cross-cultural interaction. And, in order to ensure that students graduate as well-rounded scholars, Colgate has an Areas of Inquiry requirement that ensures that students take six courses in three areas: Human Thought and Expression; Social Relations, Institution, and Agents; and Natural Sciences and Mathematics.

Apart from a strong focus on exemplary academics, the university also has what many students describe as a dynamic social scene . Greek life is big on this campus, and almost half of all sophomores, juniors, and seniors are affiliated with a fraternity or sorority.

Colgate also offers a variety of cocurricular and extracurricular options for students. The school currently boasts 260+ extracurricular organizations, ranging from student government groups to special interest clubs and beyond. The distinctive Colgate Outdoor Education Program allows students of all years and skill levels to get out of the classroom and explore the great outdoors in various capacities.

For these reasons and more, Colgate University is a top choice for many students. However, admission to this liberal arts college is quite competitive . Last admissions cycle, It received 8,394 applicants, and of those, they accepted 28.7%. In order to improve your chances of being accepted, you need a fantastic essay to help you stand out. In this blog post, we’ll be breaking down the Colgate University essay prompt in order to help you maximize your chances at acceptance.

Colgate University Application Essay Prompt

At Colgate we strive to foster an inclusive community. Please discuss how your life experiences, family background, and/or culture has helped to shape you as a person. It would be especially helpful if you would also reflect on an experience which demonstrated your character and personal values. (Maximum 250 words)

Before we delve into answering this question, it is important to keep in mind Colgate’s identity as a school. It has a great reputation of being particularly open, inclusive, and tolerant. For example, in the past the university has been ranked among the top 100 schools for LGBT+ students.

Given that its culture is known for its tolerance and open-mindedness, it is critical that new additions to this community bear the same kind of cross-cultural respect, willingness to understand, and tolerance for others. These are the kinds of character traits and personal values you want to emphasize in your essay .

That being said, you may be wondering how to elucidate these kinds of traits in the essay itself. Note that Colgate has already outlined the exact kinds of topics they want you to discuss: life experiences, family background, and/or culture.

The prompt is slightly restrictive in that there isn’t much room to expand on topics outside of these three main subjects; while you can certainly be as creative and interpretive as you see fit, the language used in this prompt doesn’t leave much room for ambiguity. Thus, it’s safest to stick to one or more of these three focuses.

You should also note that the school encourages applicants to discuss how these specific experiences should have demonstrated their character and personal values, not only how they formed them. This is an important distinction to make, as a potential applicant may be initially tempted to only discuss how their specific background allowed them to develop character traits pertinent to the theme of inclusivity.

This is not exactly what Colgate University wants. They are looking to see an experience that has tested, proven, or demonstrated these kinds of character traits or personal values, in addition to learning how your specific background has allowed you to form those values.

In other words, they want to see those values in action. It is not enough to simply tell admissions officers that because you were raised in an immigrant household, today you are a person who is tolerant of individuals from all walks of life. That’s certainly a good starting point, but Colgate wants you to show that tolerance — they don’t just want to hear about it. You need to focus on a time when that tolerance was put to the test or otherwise proven.

For instance, you could focus on a time when you came into contact with someone from a background that was vastly different from yours, and describe how you interacted with that individual in a tolerant and open-minded manner. Then, you could discuss how the reason you chose to interact with that person in this specific, inclusive way was because of your experiences as a child of immigrants, which was formative in the development of the personal values you hold today.

In short, you cannot just say that you are an inclusive, open-minded person. This needs to be clearly shown on the page. This essay should be specific, directed, and as always, personal. Admissions officers want to not only see who you are today, but what specific set of circumstances and experiences have made you that person.

With these tips in mind, you are ready to begin crafting an effective and powerful essay for your application to Colgate University! We at CollegeVine wish you the best of luck!

Want help with your college essays to improve your admissions chances? Sign up for your free CollegeVine account and get access to our essay guides and courses. You can also get your essay peer-reviewed and improve your own writing skills by reviewing other students’ essays.

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• Creative Writing Fellowship
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• Department of English and Creative Writing

To enhance our strong program in creative writing, the Department of English and Creative Writing established the Olive B. O’Connor Fellowship in Creative Writing.

This annual fellowship is designed to support writers completing their first books. It provides a generous stipend, office space, and an intellectual community for the recipients, who spend one academic year at Colgate. In return, each fellow teaches one creative writing workshop per semester and gives a public reading of their work.

2024–2025 Fellowships

Colgate University invites applications for the Olive B. O’Connor Fellowship in Creative Writing. This year we invite applications for:

• One fellowship in fiction
• One fellowship in nonfiction

Writers who have recently completed an MFA, MA, or PhD in creative writing, and who need a year to complete their first book, are encouraged to apply. The selected writers will spend the academic year (late August 2023 to early May 2024) at Colgate University in Hamilton, New York. The fellows will teach one multigenre course each semester and will give a public reading from the work in progress.

The fellowship includes:

• A stipend of $55,500
• Travel expenses
• Health and life insurance are provided

Applications

Deadline: January 5, 2024 Applications materials include: 

• cover letter
• three letters of recommendation, at least one of which should address the candidate’s abilities as a teacher
• A maximum of 30 double-spaced manuscript pages of prose. The writing sample may be a completed work or an excerpt from something larger.  

Colgate strives to be a community supportive of diverse perspectives and identities. All applications should speak directly to the candidate’s ability to work effectively with students across a wide range of identities and backgrounds.

Fiction Application

Nonfiction Application

Colgate is a highly selective liberal arts university of 3,200 students situated in central New York State. The Colgate faculty is committed to excellence in both teaching and scholarship. Further information about the  English department  is online. It is the policy of Colgate University not to discriminate against any employee or applicant for employment on the basis of their race, color, creed, religion, age, sex, pregnancy, national origin, marital status, disability, Protected Veteran status, sexual orientation, gender identity or expression, being or having been victims of domestic violence or stalking, familial status, or any other categories covered by law. Candidates from historically underrepresented groups, women, persons with disabilities, and Protected Veterans are encouraged to apply.

2023–2024 Olive B. O’Connor Fellows

Lena Crown is a writer, editor and educator from Northern California. Her work is published or forthcoming in Guernica, Gulf Coast, The Rumpus, Narratively, North American Review, Bellevue Literary Review, The Offing, and elsewhere. She has received fellowships from Virginia Center for the Creative Arts, the Ragdale Foundation, and the Peter Bullough Foundation, and she previously served as the PEN/Faulkner Writer in Residence in Washington, D.C.

Ajibola Tolase

Ajibola Tolase is a Nigerian poet and essayist. He graduated from the creative writing MFA program at the University of Wisconsin-Madison. His chapbook, Koola Lobitos was published as a part of the New Generation African Poets Series edited by Kwame Dawes and Chris Abani in 2021. His writing has appeared in LitHub, New England Review, Prairie Schooner, Poetry, and elsewhere. He is a former Wallace Stegner fellow at Stanford University and has received a creative writing grant from the Elizabeth George Foundation. 

Past Fellows

Armen davoudian.

Armen Davoudian’s poems and translations from Persian appear in Poetry magazine , the Sewanee Review , the Yale Review , and elsewhere. His chapbook, Swan Song , won the 2020 Frost Place Competition.

Pallavi Wakharkar

Pallavi Wakharkar is a writer from Phoenix, AZ. She holds an M.F.A. in creative writing from Vanderbilt University and is the 2022-23 Olive B. O’Connor Fellow in fiction at Colgate. She was the 2021 winner of The Iowa Review Award in fiction, and her work appears in The Iowa Review , Joyland Magazine , and others. She is currently working on her first novel as well as a story collection.

Esther Hayes

Esther Hayes is a fiction writer from Nevada whose work has appeared or is forthcoming in  Guernica Magazine  and  Puerto del Sol.  She was a finalist in the 2020 AWP Intro Journals Project and the 2019  Sewanee Review  Fiction Contest .  She received her MFA from Colorado State University where she served as an associate editor for  Colorado Review.  She is currently working on a collection of short stories and her first novel.

Alexander Ramirez

Alexander Ramirez is from Sacramento, CA. He is the 2021-2022 Olive B. O'Connor Fellow in Creative Writing (Nonfiction). He holds a PhD in English from the University of Nebraska-Lincoln, and his writing has appeared in  The Missouri Review ,  Image Journal , and  The Journal of American Culture , among other publications.

Maggie Millner

Maggie Millner is a poet and educator from Central New York. Her poems appear or are forthcoming in The New Yorker, POETRY, Ploughshares, Gulf Coast, ZYZZYVA , and elsewhere. She serves as a senior editor at The Yale Review and an Olive B. O'Connor Fellow in Poetry at Colgate University.

Lucy Schiller

Lucy Schiller's nonfiction work has appeared in The Baffler , Contexto , The Columbia Journalism Review , The New Yorker , The Iowa Review , Goodnight , Sweet Prince , CounterPunch , and elsewhere. She was the 2018-2019 Provost's Fellow in Nonfiction at the University of Iowa, where she received her MFA. She is currently working on a nonfiction manuscript and on a novel.

Gbenga Adesina

Gbenga Adesina's poems have appeared in Narrative, Prairie Schooner, Washington Square Review, Vinyl, Brittle Paper and Ploughshares. He has received fellowships and scholarships from the Poets House, the Norman Mailer Center, the Fine Arts Work Centre, Provincetown, the Open Society Foundation in Goree Island, off the coast of Senegal, Callaloo at Oxford and New York University where he received his MFA and held the Starworks and Goldwater Fellowships. He was a joint winner of the 2016 Brunel International Poetry Prize, the 2017 Hugh J. Luke Award from Prairie Schooner, and the 2019 Palette Poetry Spotlight Award.

Annie Vitalsey

Annie Vitalsey is a fiction writer whose stories have appeared in Reed Magazine, Bennington Review, Pacifica Literary Review, Menacing Hedge, Spilled Milk Magazine, Watershed Review, and elsewhere. In 2018, she was a Virginia G. Piper Global Residency Fellow and received her first Pushcart nomination. In 2019, she was also awarded a Desert Nights Teaching Fellowship. Vitalsey has an MFA from Arizona State University, and is currently working on her first novel. 

Ndinda Kioko

Ndinda Kioko is a Kenyan writer whose works have appeared on several platforms and publications including The Trans-African , BBC Radio 4 , Wasafiri Magazine , Africa39 , and Jalada Africa . She has also produced a TV show for M-net Africa. Ndinda was a Miles Morland Scholar for 2014. She was awarded the 2017 Wasafiri New Writing Prize and the Richard & Juliette Logsdon Award for Creative Writing. She has an MFA in Creative Writing (Fiction) from the University of Oregon.

Emily Strasser

Emily Strasser received her MFA in nonfiction from the University of Minnesota. Her essays have appeared in Catapult , Ploughshares , Guernica , Colorado Review , The Bulletin of Atomic Scientists , and Tricycle , and twice listed as notable by Best American Essays . She was a winner of the 2015 Ploughshares Emerging Writer’s Contest, and a 2016 AWP Intro Award. Her writing and research have been supported by the Minnesota State Arts Board, the Jerome Foundation, and the W.K. Rose Fellowship from Vassar College.

Rachel M. Hanson

Rachel M. Hanson holds an MFA from the University of Utah and a PhD in literature and nonfiction from the University of Missouri. Her essays and poems can be found in  The Iowa Review ,  Best New Poets 2016 ,  Best of the Net Anthology 2015 ,  Creative Nonfiction ,  The South Dakota Review ,  American Literary Review ,  The Minnesota Review ,  Entropy Magazine ,  Ninth Letter , and elsewhere. She is a former nonfiction editor for  Quarterly West  and currently reads for  The Masters Review . In the summers she runs the Colorado River through the Grand Canyon, which is the inspiration for her newest collection of essays.

Emily Jaeger

Emily Jaeger is the author of the chapbook  The Evolution of Parasites ( Sibling Rivalry Press ) illustrated by Robin Levine. Her poems have appeared in  Four Way Review ,  TriQuarterly , and  The Offing  among others. Emily received her MFA from the University of Massachusetts Boston and she has also received fellowships from Literary Lambda, TENT, the New York State Summer Writers Institute, and an Academy of American Poet's Prize.

Nana Kwame Adjei-Brenyah

Nana Kwame Adjei-Brenyah is from Spring Valley, Rockland County, New York. He is a graduate of the Syracuse MFA program in fiction. His stories have appeared or are forthcoming in Broken Pencil Magazine , Pembroke , Compose , Printer's Row , and others. He was a 2016 finalist for the Nelson Algren Literary Award and he is working on his first collection of short fiction.

Erin J. Mullikin

Erin J. Mullikin hails from the deepest earth in South Carolina and has an MFA from Syracuse University, where she edited Salt Hill Journal. She is the author of the chapbooks, When You Approach Me at the Lake of Tomorrow (Slash Pine Press) and Strategies for the Bromidic (dancing girl press), and her poems and short fiction have appeared in elsewhere , Ghost Ocean , Sprung Formal , alice blue review , Phantom , Arts & Letters , and Best New Poets 2014 , among others. She is a founding editor for NightBlock and Midnight City Books .

Thomas Mira y Lopez

Thomas Mira y Lopez is from New York. He has an MFA in creative nonfiction from the University of Arizona, where he worked as nonfiction editor for  Sonora Review  and managing editor for  Fairy Tale Review . His essays appear or are forthcoming in  Seneca Review, The Pinch, Hotel Amerika, CutBank  and other journals. He has received scholarships from Bread Loaf and the New York State Summer Writers Institute. He is at work on a book of personal essays about cemeteries and burial grounds that explores where we place and how we remember the dead.

D.J. Thielke

D.J. Thielke received her MFA in fiction from Vanderbilt University. Her stories have appeared in  Arts&Letters, The Cincinnati Review, Indiana Review, Mid-American Review,   Bat City Review , and  Crazyhorse , among others. She was the 2013-2014 James C. McCreight Fiction Fellow at the Wisconsin Institute for Creative Writing, the inaugural fall 2014 Stone Court Writer-in-Residence, and was most recently a summer fellow at the Island Institute in Sitka, Alaska.

Chelsea Biondolillo

Chelsea Biondolillo has a dual MFA in creative writing and environmental studies from the University of Wyoming. In 2012, she was an NSF-funded Think Write Publish communication fellow, and in 2014 she was awarded the Carter Prize for the Essay from  Shenandoah . Her prose has appeared or is forthcoming in  Orion, Sonora Review,   Guernica,  River Teeth ,  Hayden's Ferry Review  and others. She has written on the art of essay for  Essay Daily ,  Brevity ,  Passages North , and  Creative Nonfiction . Her journalism has appeared in  Nautilus ,  Science,  and on state and national public radio. She is currently working on a book about vultures that combines travel, memoir, ecology, and natural history.

Javier Zamora

Javier Zamora was born in El Salvador in 1990. When he was nine, he migrated to the United States. He is a CantoMundo fellow and has received scholarships from Breadloaf, Napa Valley, Squaw Valley, and VONA writer's conferences. Zamora’s poems appear in  Best New Poets 2013, Narrative Magazine, Ploughshares, Poetry,  and elsewhere. He is the recipient of a National Endowment for the Arts fellowship,  Meridian’s Editor’s Poetry Prize, and  CONSEQUENCE’s  poetry prize.

Caitlin Hayes

Caitlin Hayes has an M.A. in English Literature from the University of New Hampshire and an M.F.A in fiction from Syracuse University, where she served as fiction editor for  Salt Hill Journal . Her honors include a Joyce Carol Oates Award for short fiction and a scholarship to Bread Loaf. She has stories forthcoming in the  New England Review  and  The Southern Review .

Dong Li’s honors include DAAD (twice), Vermont Studio Center and Henry Luce Foundation fellowships. Born and raised in the People’s Republic of China, Li has degrees from Deep Springs College and Brown University. His work has appeared in  Conjunctions and comma , poetry.

Amy Butcher

Amy Butcher is a graduate of Gettysburg College and the Nonfiction Writing Program at the University of Iowa. Her essays and short stories have appeared or are forthcoming in  The Indiana Review, The Colorado Review, Brevity, The Rumpus,  and  Hobart , among others, and she is a recent recipient of a Stanley Grant for International Research. She is the managing editor of  Defunct  and a former intern for the Gettysburg Review , and is currently at work on a book-length essay that meditates on the historic battlefield town of Gettysburg, Pennsylvania, and a murder that recently occurred there. The book considers the nature of friendship and the parameters inherent in the relationships we seek.

Chinelo Okparanta

Chinelo received her BS from Penn State University, her MA from Rutgers University, and her MFA from the Iowa Writers' Workshop. Her works have appeared or are forthcoming in  Granta, The Kenyon Review, The Iowa Review, The Southern Review, The Coffin Factory, Conjunctions, Subtropics , and elsewhere. She has taught at the University of Iowa, where she served as a Dean's Fellow and subsequently as the Provost Postgraduate Visiting Writer for Fiction. Her short story collection will be published in 2013, followed shortly by her debut novel, tentatively entitled  Under The Udara Trees .

Molly Beer is a graduate of Duke University, the Bread Loaf School of English, and the University of New Mexico MFA program, where she served as nonfiction editor for Blue Mesa Review . In addition to the American Southwest, she has lived in El Salvador, Ecuador, and Mexico, and her subsequent essays grapple with the politics of place. Her most recent work appears in Salon , Guernica , Glimpse , Copper Nickel , and Room Magazine , and she is co-author of Singing Out , an oral history published by Oxford University Press (2010).

George David Clark

George David Clark's honors include a Henry Hoyns Fellowship from the University of Virginia and the Provost's Doctoral Fellowship at Texas Tech. His poems appear in such journals as The Cimarron Review , The North American Review , Quarterly West , Shenandoah , Smartish Pace , Southern Poetry Review , Willow Springs and elsewhere, and can be found reprinted online at Verse Daily and Poetry Daily . He also serves as editor of the journal, 32 Poems .

Jasmine Bailey

Jasmine Bailey graduated from Colgate in 2005 and the University of Virginia MFA program in 2010. There, she worked as poetry editor for the semi-annual literary journal, Meridian . Her chapbook of poems, Sleep and What Precedes It , won the Longleaf Press 2009 Chapbook Prize and her book-length collection of poetry, Alexandria , will be published by Carnegie Mellon. Her poems have appeared or are forthcoming in the minnesota review , Poet Lore , 32 Poems , The Carolina Quarterly , The Portland Review , and the Birmingham Poetry Review , among others.

Marjorie Celona

Marjorie Celona studied writing at the University of Victoria and the Iowa Writers’ Workshop, where she was an Iowa Arts Fellow and recipient of the Ailene Barger Barnes Prize for Excellence in the Short Story. Her stories have appeared in The Best American Nonrequired Reading (2008), Glimmer Train , Crazyhorse , Best Canadian Stories (2007, 2010, 2012), The Fiddlehead , Indiana Review , and elsewhere. In May, she will be writer-in-residence at Hawthornden Castle in Scotland, where she plans to finish her novel.

Sarah Beth Childers

Sarah finds much of her writing inspiration in the creeks, hills, and train tracks around where she grew up in Huntington, West Virginia. She has a bachelor of arts in history from Marshall University and a master of fine arts in creative nonfiction from West Virginia University. She has taught writing at West Virginia University and medieval literature and history at Duke University’s Talent Identification Program. Her work has appeared in SNReview and Paddlefish , and her short story “Red Ribbon” was nominated for a Pushcart Prize in 2009

Anthony Eleftherion

Anthony Eleftherion’s stories have appeared in the Madison Review and Epoch . He holds a bachelor’s degree in philosophy from Rutgers University and a master of fine arts degree from the Iowa Writers’ Workshop, where he was a Maytag fellow. A short film he co-wrote received a student academy award, the HBO short film award, the grand jury awards at South by Southwest and Palm Springs Film Festivals, and was an official selection of the Sundance film festival. He is completing a collection of stories about Brooklyn, NY.

Essays That Worked

The essays are a place to show us who you are and who you’ll be in our community.

It’s a chance to add depth to something that is important to you and tell the admissions committee more about your background or goals. Below you’ll find selected examples of essays that “worked,” as nominated by our admissions committee. In each of these essays, students were able to share stories from their everyday lives to reveal something about their character, values, and life that aligned with the culture and values at Hopkins.

Read essays that worked from Transfer applicants .

Hear from the class of 2027.

These selections represent just a few examples of essays we found impressive and helpful during the past admissions cycle. We hope these essays inspire you as you prepare to compose your own personal statements. The most important thing to remember is to be original as you share your own story, thoughts, and ideas with us.

Ordering the Disorderly

Ellie’s essay skillfully uses the topic of entropy as an extended metaphor. Through it, we see reflections about who they are and who they aspire to be.

Pack Light, But Be Prepared

In Pablo’s essay, the act of packing for a pilgrimage becomes a metaphor for the way humans accumulate experiences in their life’s journey and what we can learn from them. As we join Pablo through the diverse phases of their life, we gain insights into their character and values.

Tikkun Olam

Julieta illustrates how the concept of Tikkun Olam, “a desire to help repair the world,” has shaped their passions and drives them to pursue experiences at Hopkins.

Kashvi’s essay encapsulates a heartfelt journey of self-discovery and the invaluable teachings of Rock, their 10-year-old dog. Through the lens of their companionship, Kashvi walked us through valuable lessons on responsibility, friendship, patience, and unconditional love.

Classical Reflections in Herstory

Maddie’s essay details their intellectual journey using their love of Greek classics. They incorporate details that reveal the roots of their academic interests: storytelling, literary devices, and translation. As their essay progresses, so do Maddie’s intellectual curiosities.

My Spotify Playlist

Alyssa’s essay reflects on special memories through the creative lens of Spotify playlists. They use three examples to highlight their experiences with their tennis team, finding a virtual community during the pandemic, and co-founding a nonprofit to help younger students learn about STEM.

More essays that worked

We share essays from previously admitted students—along with feedback from our admissions committee—so you can understand what made them effective and how to start crafting your own.

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Guest Essay

I Work in Supply Chain Logistics. Here’s What I Advise After the Tragedy in Baltimore.

By Ryan Petersen

Mr. Petersen is the chief executive of Flexport, a supply chain technology and logistics company.

The immediate impact of the collapse of the Francis Scott Key Bridge in Baltimore on Tuesday was viscerally clear: In minutes, the Baltimore Harbor went from a humming logistics hub to a chaotic search and rescue operation. Two construction workers who had been fixing potholes on the bridge were pulled from the water, with six more missing and presumed dead.

As a native of Maryland, I grew up driving through the Baltimore Beltway with my family to see the Orioles play at Camden Yards, which is near Baltimore’s Inner Harbor. Seeing container ships sail through the port was one of my earliest memories of global shipping.

Last year the Port of Baltimore processed 1.1 million 20-foot containers’ worth of cargo, making it the ninth-busiest port, based on trade volume in the United States, and the most important port serving our nation’s capital. It’s also the busiest U.S. port for car shipments, with more than 800,000 vehicles moving through its waters onto its docks and across its roads and railways in 2023.

Shipping terminals at the Port of Baltimore are now blocked

Locust Point

Fairfield, Atlantic

and Chesapeake

Consol terminal

Curtis Bay piers

Shipping paths

Collapsed section

of Francis Scott

Chesapeake Bay

As rescue workers and salvage crews work tirelessly to recover bodies and restore access to the harbor, our national supply chain is kicking into high gear to absorb the aftershock of the bridge collapse. Ship traffic to the Port of Baltimore is being rerouted to nearby ports, including one in Norfolk, Va., and the Port of New York and New Jersey. These changes come at a time when global supply chains are already stressed, with ships changing course to avoid Houthi attacks in the Red Sea and low-water restrictions limiting capacity through the Panama Canal. The looming contract expiration for the International Longshoremen’s Association in September also creates uncertainty for businesses that rely on cargo sent by sea.

As a result of all this precariousness, many companies that typically move goods through East Coast ports are already asking about rerouting their cargo through West Coast ports, opting to truck or rail the goods across the country to avoid delays. Ports around the country are preparing to absorb surges in volume as companies reroute around the Port of Baltimore and avoid the East Coast more generally.

Baltimore has the fourth-largest port on the Eastern Seaboard

The East Coast of the United States received over 450 million tons of cargo by ship in 2021. Baltimore’s 50-foot channel and berths allow it to handle larger ships than many other U.S. ports.

Tons of cargo

New York and New Jersey

Philadelphia

South Jersey

37.4 million tons

Cargo ships originally headed to Baltimore are being rerouted to the ports of Virginia and New York and New Jersey.

Jacksonville

If there’s one lesson we learned about the supply chain in recent years, it’s that sudden increases in container volumes arriving in U.S. ports can compound into congestion and delays. This was most evident during the peak of the pandemic-induced supply chain crisis, when over 100 ships were waiting off the coast to unload at U.S. ports.

We don’t yet know what caused the power loss that led to the crash in Baltimore or what could be done to avoid tragedies like this in the future. As we mourn the loss of life, what’s obvious to those of us in the shipping industry is that chronic underinvestment in America’s ports makes them ill suited to handle the surging volumes they are likely to experience as traffic planned for Baltimore is shifted to neighboring ports.

America’s ports are vital to American interests and are the backbone of our economy. Yet some of our largest ports can handle vessels only two-thirds the size of the world’s largest and most efficient container ships, which today primarily sail on the Asia to Europe trade lane, avoiding the United States altogether.

While recent plans by the Biden administration to invest billions in new, U.S.-manufactured container cranes appear to be a step in the right direction, it remains to be seen whether we’ll actually be getting larger, more efficient cranes capable of servicing the biggest ships or if we’re simply replacing the existing cranes with similar models while doing little to improve the throughput of our ports.

America’s supply chain infrastructure is central to our country’s prosperity. We should invest far more to dredge our ports and enable them to handle larger ships, build new rail connections, automate port operations and employ container dispatching software to increase the throughput of trucks loading and delivering containers. The failure to do so leaves us weaker and more vulnerable when catastrophe strikes.

The good news is that off-the-shelf technology already exists and has been successfully used in ports around the world. Port modernization would lead to high-paying jobs in and around American ports while making our infrastructure and economy more resilient to shocks like the one we’re experiencing in Baltimore.

Ryan Petersen is the chief executive of Flexport, a supply chain technology and logistics company.

Source images by THEPALMER/Getty Images and Nathan Howard/Reuters.

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The Invisible Work of America’s Domestic Workers

With few protections, the day-to-day demands of caregivers can go unnoticed..

Chloe Aftel April 1, 2024

Care worker Vivian Siordia with Colin Campbell, for whom she works. Chloe Aftel

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This story is a collaboration with the Economic Hardship Reporting Project and Magnum Foundation . We asked photographers to show us the paradox of today’s labor movement. Even as the popularity of unions has grown over the last decade, actual membership has continued to decline . Can new enthusiasm revitalize American labor? Read about this unique moment for workers here .

Domestic workers perform grueling work with few protections. They provide care in isolated settings, leaving their essential labor all too often hidden. It can be a difficult job and a complicated one. When you work in a home, lines blur. 

For decades, feminist activists have said that work in the home—often performed for no pay by wives, mothers, and daughters—has been misunderstood as separate from “real” labor. This feminized care has been relegated and detached from a labor movement focused on men.

In the United States, such work has also been done by Black women who have had to organize aggressively against the odds. Infamously, domestic workers were excluded from the labor agenda during the New Deal. And, since then, they have had to fight to catch up to standards enshrined for others in the law. The National Domestic Workers Alliance and others have sought to change the state of play. After the pandemic , there has also been an uptick in interest in movements like Wages for Housework —a campaign in the 1970s to organize and recognize work in the home.

In this project, Chloe Aftel highlights the day-to-day demands of these workers who often go unnoticed. She follows Vivian Siordia and Liezl Japona, both care workers in California, showing the daily ups and downs of such labor. Both Siordia and Japona think that more organizing and aid to care workers could help make the job better.

Care worker Vivian Siordia dressing Colin Campbell, who has cerebral palsy, in the morning.

Colin’s shoes in his bedroom. Siordia has been caring for him for a year. Before, she worked as a teacher.

Siordia lifting Colin out of bed in the morning. “Unionization is important to me,” she says of efforts to organize home workers. “I would like to go in that direction.” 

Siordia helps Colin get dressed in the morning.

Arianne Campbell makes breakfast, including pancakes, for Colin, her son, and Siordia. “Arianne is very professional, and I am very lucky that my life and space are protected,” Siordia told me. “For others, bringing a live-in caregiver, sometimes boundaries can be overstepped. Personal rights should be a given.”

Siordia and Campbell eat together after Colin has finished his meal.

Siordia gets ready to take Colin out to play with his basketball.

Colin and Siordia play with a basketball in the hallway of their apartment complex in the morning. Originally, Siordia had planned to be a nanny and then saw an opportunity to work for Arianne Campbell. “It was a big new step for me that worked out,” she says.

Colin and Siordia work on reading skills.

Arianne shows Colin what is coming up for the week on his wall calendar.

Vivian Siordia at home.

Care worker Liezl Japona gives Dr. Irene Goldenberg her first round of medications for the day at her home in Los Angeles. Japona is affiliated with Hand in Hand, a national group of employers of nannies, house cleaners, and home attendants advocating for better labor practices and affordable, accessible homecare, both in solidarity with workers.

Japona has worked as a caregiver for 23 years—18 in the Middle East and five in the United States. She spends time talking with Dr. Irene after her first round of medications.

Japona does the dishes after preparing breakfast for Dr. Irene. 

Japona picks out clothing options for Dr. Irene. Currently, Japona works only 15 hours a week. 

Japona helps Dr. Irene put on jewelry for the day after helping her get dressed.

Japona waits for Dr. Irene to come down the stairs and prepares her walker.

Japona does laundry for Dr. Irene.

Care worker Liezl Japona at her home.

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