god's forgiveness essay

Forgiveness: The Very Essence of Our Faith

If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you refuse to forgive others, you Father will not forgive your sins. Matthew 6:14-15

Joseph was the pride and joy of his father. Though Jacob had ten other sons, he favored Joseph, the one born to him in his old age. Jacob never bothered to hide his special feelings—not even from his other sons. In fact, he expressed his favoritism blatantly and visibly by having an expensive coat made especially for Joseph.

This did not go unnoticed by the older brothers, and they began to resent their spoiled young sibling. Joseph, who was either oblivious to their resentment or insensitive to it, made it worse by bragging to his brothers about his dreams that he would one day rule over them. In one dream, his brothers' sheaves of grain bowed down to his. In another dream, the sun, moon, and eleven stars bowed down to him.

Eventually, Joseph's vivid dreams and their father's favoritism so infuriated the brothers that they plotted Joseph's death. While trying to decide the best way to accomplish it, they spotted a caravan of spice traders on the way to Egypt. Instead of killing Joseph, they decided to sell him as a slave. They said good riddance to their dreaming brother and made up a story to tell their father about his favorite son's tragic fate.

So much for dreams of greatness. At age seventeen, Joseph became a slave in Egypt, then a prisoner in a rank dungeon for a crime he did not commit. The situation provided Joseph with plenty of time to think about his life and what he had done. Somewhere along the way, Joseph made a choice. He decided to forgive his brothers. Eventually God fulfilled the promise he had conveyed through dreams to the brash young man, but not before refining Joseph's character through forgiveness.

The Importance of Forgiveness

Forgiveness is something all of us want to receive but most of us hesitate to give. Jesus makes it clear, however, that we can't have it without giving it. If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins ( Matthew 6:14-15 ). These words allow no room for doubt or discussion. Forgiveness flows two ways. We cannot separate receiving forgiveness from extending forgiveness.

Forgiveness is at the core of emotional well-being. It is fair to say that unforgiving people are emotionally sick. Their bitterness is a disease of the spirit, and it is inevitable that the unforgiving person eventually will experience physical illness as well. Anger causes surges of adrenaline and secretes other powerful chemicals that attack the body. The stress we carry when we refuse to give or receive forgiveness affects our hearts, minds, and bodies. To make matters worse, both rage and depression contribute to obsessive behaviors such as overeating, workaholism, overspending, and even addictions to pornography and mood-altering drugs. We cannot rid ourselves of emotional pain and its side effects unless we are willing to forgive.

Unresolved anger keeps us from moving forward because it locks us in a time machine, frozen on the exact moment when a particular offense occurred. Fear of further injury makes us unwilling to move to new levels of relationship, not only with those who have hurt us but with anyone who represents a similar threat.

Furthermore, if we allow unforgiveness to continue, we are likely to experience depression, bitterness, or both. Yet more important than any of these concerns is the most serious consideration of all—the spiritual consequence of unforgiveness: alienation from God.

Forgiveness cannot begin until we admit our own failures. If we cannot do that much, we can neither give nor receive forgiveness. We cannot receive forgiveness without acknowledging our need for it, and we cannot extend forgiveness without admitting that because of our own imperfect condition we have no right to withhold forgiveness from anyone else. For Christians, forgiveness is nonnegotiable; it is the very essence of our faith.

Obstacles to Forgiveness: Fear or Misconception

The reason many of us refuse to forgive is our fear of loss. And there's no denying that forgiveness requires us to give up attitudes and actions that are important to us.

Fear of Losing the Energy that Anger Produces. Some people are reluctant to let go of the burning energy that rage generates. It's like a fuel that keeps them moving. Without it they would likely descend into despair and purposelessness because their anger is their purpose.

Fear of Losing Leverage in a Relationship. Those who are still smarting from pain are not eager to risk being hurt again. They assumed that if they forgive the guilty party, he or she will feel free to repeat the offense. This brings up an important point: Forgiveness does not guarantee change in the other person's behavior . Forgiveness is an act of obedience, not a tool of manipulation. It is a way of cleaning up the grudges and resentments that damage us. Although we cannot stop people from hurting themselves, we can, in some situations (if we are not legally or morally tied to the offender), guard ourselves against repeated injury. By removing ourselves from the relationship or by changing the rules of engagement, we can limit the person's ability to continue hurtful behavior.

Fear of Losing Hope for a Better Relationship. Some people have expectations for friends and family that are too high. As years go by, repeated foolish choices and ongoing evidence of serious character flaws devastate those who expect too much. In such cases, it is necessary to forgive people simply for being who and what they are and to accept that they probably are not going to change.

Fear of Losing Power and Control. Refusing to forgive keeps others in our debt. In families, we often see parents who hold some wrong against an adult child, exacting payment in visits, gifts, and favors. Although forgiving feels like an act of surrender, those who've done it know it's an act requiring tremendous strength.

Fear of Losing the Image of Superiority. Holding an offense against another person places us in a "good guy, bad guy" picture with ourselves wearing the white hat. Imagining that we are better than others makes us feel good, but such a prideful attitude is unacceptable to God. When we hold people captive to our judgment, we play God in their lives. This places us in an unwinnable wrestling match with our Creator, who, as the apostle James reminded us, "sets himself against the proud" ( James 4:6 ).

Misconception

Some of the greatest obstacles to forgiveness are the misconceptions about what it is. Realizing what forgiveness is not may make it easier.

It is NOT Condoning the Behavior. Once we understand that the act of forgiving does not compromise our moral standard by condoning the offense, we are in a position to forgive even the worst of sins. To forgive is not saying, "What you did is okay." It is saying, "The consequences of your behavior belong to God, not to me." When we forgive, we transfer the person from our system of justice to God's. To forgive is to recognize that the wrong done against us is a debt of sin, and all sin is against God. Therefore, in forgiving, we transfer the debt from our ledger of accounts to God's, leaving all recompense in his hands.

It is NOT Forgetting What Happened. It would be foolish to erase from mind some of the wrongs done to us. If we were to do so, we would never learn from our experiences and would walk right back into the same or a similar situation, only to face the same disappointments. What can eventually be forgotten are the raw emotions associated with the event. When we forgive, the terrible memories and feelings gradually diminish.

It is NOT Restoring Trust in the Person. Trust is earned. It is something we give to those who deserve it. To blindly trust someone who has hurt us is naïve and irresponsible. If a person is a thief, it is foolish to give her a key to your house. If he were a pedophile, you would be derelict to hire him as a baby-sitter. We can forgive people from the wrong they've done without extending to them an open invitation to do it again. It is foolish to trust and untrustworthy person.

It is NOT Agreeing to Reconcile. Forgiveness is a necessary step toward reconciliation , but reconciliation is not necessarily the goal of forgiveness. In fact, there are some situations when reconciliation is not a good idea. It is silly, if not dangerous, to press for reconciliation when the other person is unrepentant, unchanging, or unwilling.

It is NOT Doing the Person a Favor. In Judaism, forgiveness is not required unless repentance is demonstrated and pardon is sought. But Jesus raised the standard of forgiveness to a higher level. According to him, we are to forgive even those who remain unrepentant. Forgiveness benefits the giver at least as much as the receiver, so we extend it whether or not the person asks for it.

It is NOT Easy. Forgiving is difficult enough when it involves a one time transgression. It verges on the impossible when the offense is ongoing. Such circumstances require an attitude of forgiveness, not simply and act of forgiveness. When Peter asked Jesus how often he should forgive, Jesus gave an unsettling answer:

Peter came to him and asked, "Lord, how often should I forgive someone who sins against me? Seven times?" "No!" Jesus replied, "seventy times seven!" ( Matthew 18:21-22 )

Think about the mathematics of that statement. Can you imagine forgiving anyone, even for a minor offense, 490 times? Imagine having a neighborhood kid ride his bike through your garden even day of the week for seventy weeks. (That's one year, four months, and two weeks!)

Jesus is asking us to do something that is humanly impossible. In and of ourselves we don't have enough forgiveness to go around. But God does. So when our limited resources run out and we are unable to forgive, we can ask him to forgive others through us. In so doing, we take one more step of obedience and allow ourselves to become a conduit of God's grace.

Photo credit: Unsplash/Priscilla Du Preez

The above piece is an adaptation from Transformation, by Steve Arterburn. Wheaton, Tyndale House Publishers.

Stephen Arterburn is the founder of New Life Ministries, the largest provider of Christian counseling and treatment in North America. As host of the daily New Life Live! radio program, he is heard nationally on over one hundred and eighty stations and at www.newlife.com . Steve is the lead speaker at The New Life Weekend, a conference with specialty programs for Marriage , Balancing Your Life, Anger, Fear, Boundaries, Depression, Weight Loss, Abuse, and Forgiveness. Steve is also the creator of Women of Faith® Conferences and the author/coauthor of over fifty books, including Healing is a Choice, Lose it For Life, Internet Protect Your Kids, Every Man's Battle, Avoiding Mr. Wrong, Reframe Your Life, and Midlife Manual for Men.

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What Is Forgiveness According to the Bible?

The Bible teaches two types of forgiveness

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What is forgiveness? Is there a definition of forgiveness in the Bible ? Does biblical forgiveness mean believers are considered clean by God? And what should our attitude be toward others who have hurt us?

Two types of forgiveness appear in the Bible: God's pardon of our sins, and our obligation to pardon others. This subject is so important that our eternal destiny depends on it.

Forgiveness Definition

• Forgiveness, according to the Bible, is correctly understood as God's promise not to count our sins against us.
• Biblical forgiveness requires repentance on our part (turning away from our old life of sin) and faith in Jesus Christ.
• One condition for receiving forgiveness from God is our willingness to forgive other people.
• Human forgiveness is a reflection of our experience and understanding of God's forgiveness.
• Love (not obligatory rule-following) is the motivation behind God's forgiveness of us and our forgiveness of others.

What Is Forgiveness by God?

Humankind has a sinful nature. Adam and Eve disobeyed God in the Garden of Eden , and humans have been sinning against God ever since.

God loves us too much to let us destroy ourselves in Hell . He provided a way for us to be forgiven, and that way is through Jesus Christ . Jesus confirmed that in no uncertain terms when he said, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me" (John 14:6, NIV). God's plan of salvation was to send Jesus, his only Son, into the world as a sacrifice for our sins.

That sacrifice was necessary to satisfy God's justice. Moreover, that sacrifice had to be perfect and spotless. Because of our sinful nature, we cannot repair our broken relationship with God on our own. Only Jesus was qualified to do that for us.

At the Last Supper , on the night before his crucifixion , he took a cup of wine and told his apostles , "This is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins" (Matthew 26:28, NIV).

The next day, Jesus died on the cross , taking the punishment due us, and atoning for our sins. On the third day after that, he rose from the dead , conquering death for all who believe in him as Savior.

John the Baptist  and Jesus commanded that we repent, or turn away from our sins to receive God's forgiveness. When we do, our sins are forgiven, and we are assured of eternal life in heaven.

What Is Forgiveness of Others?

As believers, our relationship with God is restored, but what about our relationship with our fellow human beings? The Bible states that when someone hurts us, we are under an obligation to God to forgive that person. Jesus is very clear on this point:

Matthew 6:14-15 For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. (NIV)

Refusing to forgive is a sin. If we receive forgiveness from God, we must give it to others who hurt us. We cannot hold grudges or seek revenge. We are to trust God for justice and forgive the person who offended us. That does not mean we must forget the offense, however; usually, that's beyond our power. Forgiveness means releasing the other from blame, leaving the event in God's hands, and moving on.

We may resume a relationship with the person if we had one, or we may not if one did not exist before. Certainly, the victim of a crime has no obligation to become friends with the criminal. We leave it to the courts and to God to judge them.

Nothing compares to the freedom we feel when we learn to forgive others. When we choose not to forgive, we become slaves to bitterness. We are the ones most hurt by holding on to unforgiveness.

In his book, "Forgive and Forget", Lewis Smedes wrote these profound words about forgiveness:

"When you release the wrongdoer from the wrong, you cut a malignant tumor out of your inner life. You set a prisoner free, but you discover that the real prisoner was yourself."

Summing Up Forgiveness

What is forgiveness? The entire Bible points to Jesus Christ and his divine mission to save us from our sins.

The apostle Peter summed up forgiveness like this:

Acts 10:39-43 Everyone who believes in him receives forgiveness of sins through his name. (NIV)

Paul summarized forgiveness like so:

Ephesians 1:7–8 He [God] is so rich in kindness and grace that he purchased our freedom with the blood of his Son and forgave our sins. He has showered his kindness on us, along with all wisdom and understanding. (NLT)

Ephesians 4:32 Be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you. (NLT)

John the apostle said:

1 John 1:9 But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness. (NLT)

Jesus taught us to pray:

Matthew 6:12 And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. (NIV)

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The Importance of Forgiveness

"If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins."

Matthew 6:14-15

It's an amazing thing to be forgiven by God. Because of his grace poured out through Christ, we can be forgiven for all of our sins, no matter how horrendous they might be. What a wonder!

Yet when we receive God's forgiveness, we do more than rejoice in our blessing. We also become people who pass on forgiveness to others. "Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others" (Col. 3:13). God's forgiveness enables us to forgive others even as it sets the standard for our forgiveness.

Jesus emphasizes the necessary connection between divine and human forgiveness. You can't have one without the other. This means one of the primary marks of the Christian will be a willingness to forgive others generously. People will know we are Christians, not only by our love, but also by our forgiveness.

RELATED BIBLE PASSAGES: Psalm 103; Matthew 18:23-35; Colossians 3:12-13; Ephesians 4:31-5:2

QUESTIONS FOR REFLECTION: Are you a forgiving person? What makes it hard for you to forgive people who have wronged you? What helps you to forgive? Are there people in your life whom you need to forgive, even today?

PRAYER : Dear Lord, little means more to me than your forgiveness. When I consider how much I have sinned against you, both in deed and in thought, I am astounded by the fact that you forgive me. Through Christ, you wipe my slate clean. I have a fresh start with you, because of your forgiveness. Hallelujah!

Today I'm reminded that it isn't enough merely for me to receive your forgiveness. I need to give away what I have so freely received. When others wrong me, I should be quick to forgive. Sometimes I can do this. But sometimes, especially when I have been painfully wronged, I find it hard to forgive. Holding a grudge feels safe. Bitterness seems only fair. So I ask for your help, Lord. Remind me of how you have forgiven me. Let your Spirit stir up in me the will to forgive.

May I be known, not only as one who has been forgiven, but also as one who forgives, so that people might see your presence in me. Amen .

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Reflections: Forgiving In Difficult Situations

October 2015.

In July 1963, near the end of his life, C.S. Lewis wrote a letter to a lady in Washington, DC who was in a situation where, as Lewis put, she faced “as difficult a job in the forgiving line as can well be imagined.” As part of his letter, Lewis recounted a very personal story about his own efforts at forgiving someone who had done him great wrong:

Do you know, only a few weeks ago I realised suddenly that I at last had forgiven the cruel schoolmaster who so darkened my childhood. I’d been trying to do it for years: and like you, each time I thought I’d done it, I found, after a week or so it all had to be attempted over again. But this time I feel sure it is the real thing. And (like learning to swim or to ride a bicycle) the moment it does happen it seems so easy and you wonder why on earth you didn’t do it years ago. So the parable of the unjust judge comes true, and what has been vainly asked for years can suddenly be granted. I also get a quite new feeling about ‘If you forgive you will be forgiven.’ I don’t believe it is, as it sounds, a bargain. The forgiving and the being forgiven are really the [very] same thing. But one is safe as long as one keeps on trying. 1

Lewis well understood the importance, indeed the necessity of forgiving others. In his essay “On Forgiveness,” written in 1947, 2  Lewis had stated:

We believe that God forgives us our sins; but also that He will not do so unless we forgive other people their sins against us. There is no doubt about the second part of this statement. It is in the Lord’s Prayer; was emphatically stated by our Lord. If you don’t forgive you will not be forgiven. No part of His teaching is clearer, and there are no exceptions to it. 3

Even when we understand the importance of forgiving others, it can sometimes be very hard, and especially in difficult situations, may require repeated efforts and much prayer. As Lewis recounted in his letter, it literally took him years before he succeeded in forgiving his cruel schoolmaster. Is there anyone you need to forgive, perhaps in a situation where forgiveness is very hard? In such a situation, it may be helpful to remember Lewis’s example and his advice to keep on trying. It may also be helpful to seek prayer and counsel from a godly pastor or elder.

“…for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure.” PHILIPPIANS 2:13 (ESV)

1 C.S. Lewis,  Collected Letters, vol. III, Narnia, Cambridge and Joy, 1950-1963,  edited by Walter Hooper,    (HarperCollins London, 2006), p. 1438. 2 The essay was not published until 1975. C.S. Lewis,  The Weight of Glory,  Introduction by Walter Hooper (SanFrancisco: HarperCollins, 2001), pp. 20-21. 3 C.S. Lewis,  The Weight of Glory  (SanFrancisco: HarperCollins, 2001), p. 178.

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Essay on Forgiveness by C.S. Lewis

By Macmillan Publishing Company, Inc. N.Y. 1960

We say a great many things in church (and out of church too) without thinking of what we are saying. For instance, we say in the Creed " I believe in the forgiveness of sins." I had been saying it for several years before I asked myself why it was in the Creed. At first sight it seems hardly worth putting in. "If one is a Christian," I thought " of course one believes in the forgiveness of sins. It goes without saying." But the people who compiled the Creed apparently thought that this was a part of our belief which we needed to be reminded of every time we went to church. And I have begun to see that, as far as I am concerned, they were right. To believe in the forgiveness of sins is not so easy as I thought. Real belief in it is the sort of thing that easily slips away if we don't keep on polishing it up.

We believe that God forgives us our sins; but also that He will not do so unless we forgive other people their sins against us. There is no doubt about the second part of this statement. It is in the Lord's Prayer, it was emphatically stated by our Lord. If you don't forgive you will not be forgiven. No exceptions to it. He doesn't say that we are to forgive other people's sins, provided they are not too frightful, or provided there are extenuating circumstances, or anything of that sort. We are to forgive them all, however spiteful, however mean, however often they are repeated. If we don't we shall be forgiven none of our own.

Now it seems to me that we often make a mistake both about God's forgiveness of our sins and about the forgiveness we are told to offer to other people's sins. Take it first about God's forgiveness, I find that when I think I am asking God to forgive me I am often in reality (unless I watch myself very carefully) asking Him to do something quite different. I am asking him not to forgive me but to excuse me. But there is all the difference in the world between forgiving and excusing. Forgiveness says, "Yes, you have done this thing, but I accept your apology; I will never hold it against you and everything between us two will be exactly as it was before." If one was not really to blame then there is nothing to forgive. In that sense forgiveness and excusing are almost opposites. Of course, in dozens of cases, either between God and man, or between one man and another, there may be a mixture of the two. Part of what at first seemed to be the sins turns out to be really nobody's fault and is excused; the bit that is left over is forgiven. If you had a perfect excuse, you would not need forgiveness; if the whole of your actions needs forgiveness, then there was no excuse for it. But the trouble is that what we call "asking God's forgiveness" very often really consists in asking God to accept our excuses. What leads us into this mistake is the fact that there usually is some amount of excuse, some "extenuating circumstances." We are so very anxious to point these things out to God (and to ourselves) that we are apt to forget the very important thing; that is, the bit left over, the bit which excuses don't cover, the bit which is inexcusable but not, thank God, unforgivable. And if we forget this, we shall go away imagining that we have repented and been forgiven when all that has really happened is that we have satisfied ourselves without own excuses. They may be very bad excuses; we are all too easily satisfied about ourselves.

There are two remedies for this danger. One is to remember that God knows all the real excuses very much better than we do. If there are real "extenuating circumstances" there is no fear that He will overlook them. Often He must know many excuses that we have never even thought of, and therefore humble souls will, after death, have the delightful surprise of discovering that on certain occasions they sinned much less than they thought. All the real excusing He will do. What we have got to take to Him is the inexcusable bit, the sin. We are only wasting our time talking about all the parts which can (we think) be excused. When you go to a Dr. you show him the bit of you that is wrong - say, a broken arm. It would be a mere waste of time to keep on explaining that your legs and throat and eyes are all right. You may be mistaken in thinking so, and anyway, if they are really right, the doctor will know that.

The second remedy is really and truly to believe in the forgiveness of sins. A great deal of our anxiety to make excuses comes from not really believing in it, from thinking that God will not take us to Himself again unless He is satisfied that some sort of case can be made out in our favor. But that is not forgiveness at all. Real forgiveness means looking steadily at the sin, the sin that is left over without any excuse, after all allowances have been made, and seeing it in all its horror, dirt, meanness, and malice, and nevertheless being wholly reconciled to the man who has done it.

When it comes to a question of our forgiving other people, it is partly the same and partly different. It is the same because, here also forgiving does not mean excusing. Many people seem to think it does. They think that if you ask them to forgive someone who has cheated or bullied them you are trying to make out that there was really no cheating or bullying. But if that were so, there would be nothing to forgive. (This doesn't mean that you must necessarily believe his next promise. It does mean that you must make every effort to kill every taste of resentment in your own heart - every wish to humiliate or hurt him or to pay him out.) The difference between this situation and the one in which you are asking God's forgiveness is this. In our own case we accept excuses too easily, in other people's we do not accept them easily enough. As regards my own sins it is a safe bet (though not a certainty) that the excuses are not really so good as I think; as regards other men's sins against me it is a safe bet (though not a certainty) that the excuses are better than I think. One must therefore begin by attending to everything which may show that the other man was not so much to blame as we thought. But even if he is absolutely fully to blame we still have to forgive him; and even if ninety-nine per cent of his apparent guilt can be explained away by really good excuses, the problem of forgiveness begins with the one per cent of guilt that is left over. To excuse, what can really produce good excuses is not Christian charity; it is only fairness. To be a Christian means to forgive the inexcusable, because God has forgiven the inexcusable in you.

This is hard. It is perhaps not so hard to forgive a single great injury. But to forgive the incessant provocations of daily life - to keep on forgiving the bossy mother-in-law, the bullying husband, the nagging wife, the selfish daughter, the deceitful son - How can we do it? Only, I think, by remembering where we stand, by meaning our words when we say in our prayers each night "Forgive our trespasses * as we forgive those that trespass against us." We are offered forgiveness on no other terms. To refuse it is to refuse God's mercy for ourselves. There is no hint of exceptions and God means what He says.

*Trespasses=offences, being offended or offending. (Notes are not authored to Mr. Lewis.)

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FORGIVENESS

Transformation in love.

Forgiveness is essential to healthy human relationships. The French Jesuit and theologian, François Varillon, once said, “People cannot live together unless they forgive each other just for being who they are.” We all need to forgive and be forgiven, over and over again, if our life together is to be life-giving, and if we are to be the agents of healing and reconciliation in the world that Christ calls us to be.

Sometimes it is easy to forgive. We find no difficulty in setting aside the incident and moving on. But at other times we may find it extremely difficult to forgive the one who has hurt us. We may believe that we should forgive; we may even want to forgive. But we recognize that our heart is so full of anger and pain that we cannot yet say, “I forgive you,” and mean it. A declaration of forgiveness at this point would be dishonest and premature. In circumstances like these, we can at least set ourselves on a path towards forgiveness, recognizing that arriving at forgiveness is a desirable and necessary goal, not only because we are commanded to forgive one another “seventy times seven,” but also because forgiveness will rid our hearts of the toxic presence of resentment, anger, and bitterness.

In this article, I hope to raise some questions that one who is on the path towards forgiveness may want to consider. Hopefully, honest engagement with these questions will enhance and facilitate the process of healing so that we may arrive at our destination (actual forgiveness) as soon as possible, recognizing that the time required will vary, depending on the depth of the wound.

People cannot live together unless they forgive each other just for being who they are. —François Varillon

Before we set out on the path towards forgiveness, we must be convinced of the worthiness of our goal.

We might first reflect on the costs of withholding forgiveness. Without forgiveness, the hurt we have experienced is perpetuated and passed on to others. Anger, bitterness, and resentment take root in our hearts and gradually change us from within. We stay mired in the past and lose our ability to be present in the moment and to be hopeful about the future. We may become bitter and cynical, or we may be tempted to seek revenge, which will lock us into a cycle of violence that will bring on a whole series of disappointments and misfortunes. Withholding forgiveness is not a healthy option.

We might also reflect on the benefits of forgiving. Forgiveness is essential to our spiritual well-being; it is the necessary outcome of loving one another as God has loved us. “Forgive us our sins,” we pray, “as we forgive those who sin against us.” Jesus commands us to forgive, repeatedly, just as we have been forgiven. Forgiveness heals the brokenness of our hearts and sets us free; it enables us to cultivate a loving heart towards others. It will afford us a clear conscience and bring us peace. There is every reason to set out on this path.

It is important at the outset to rule out the possibility of taking revenge. (As Mahatma Gandhi – and Jesus – taught us, “Violence begets violence.”) Even if we feel that revenge is justified, in the end it will lead only to further misery and guilt, and will deepen our resentment, hostility, and anger. We do best to avoid it at all costs.

It is also important at the outset to put a stop to the offensive actions of another, which is not at all like taking revenge. As long as the offensive behavior continues, there can be no possibility of forgiveness. Forgiveness does not mean giving up our rights or cowering before the offender. Putting an end to the offensive behavior may mean confronting the person, or seeking outside assistance, or even appealing to the justice system. But these hurtful actions must stop.

• What relationships or situations in your life are calling out for forgiveness?
• What is the cost of letting the situation continue as it is?
• What benefits can you foresee from addressing the situation?

“When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free.” – Catherine Ponder

We will run the risk of never being able to offer real forgiveness unless we admit the hurt we have experienced at the hands of the offender. Denying the offense or simply trying to forget it will short-circuit the process of forgiveness. Forgiveness does not mean excusing the offender or absolving him or her of all moral responsibility, nor does it mean simply ‘leaving it to God’ (God does not do what is up to us to do; forgiveness depends as much on human as on divine actions). Examining the painful incident honestly is a critical first step towards healing.

We may find it helpful to share our pain with someone who is discrete and trustworthy, and who will not judge us or minimize our pain or overwhelm us with advice. It can add to our suffering if we feel that we are carrying the burden alone. Telling someone also allows us to name and relive the painful event calmly and in a safe environment. When we do this, the pain becomes less threatening and more bearable. The unconditional acceptance of the other person allows us to treat ourselves with compassion.

Examining the effects of the painful incident will help us grieve our losses and move towards genuine forgiveness. We might try to describe what has been damaged or lost (our self-esteem, our reputation, our self-confidence, our integrity, our faith in others, our ideals, our material goods or health or social image, the ability to trust someone with our secrets, admiration for a person we have loved, and so on). Recognizing these wounds is healthy and helpful, whereas taking on the label of “victim” is unhealthy and unhelpful. By labeling ourselves as victims, we lock ourselves into an unhelpful role, which makes forgiveness difficult or impossible.

While it is important to own our own responsibility in the matter (e.g. in the breakdown of a relationship), it is just as important to realize that we are not the only one responsible for the painful event or offense.

If we recognize the presence of anger, it is best if we try to express and release it in the most constructive way possible. Anger is a legitimate emotional response to the hurtful actions or words of an offender, but we must be careful to keep it from taking root and growing into resentment or bitterness. Repressed anger hinders our ability to find joy in relationships; it reveals itself in negative behaviors such as blaming, nagging, cynicism, hostility, or sulking.

• Name the offense you wish to forgive, as specifically as you can.
• Can you describe its effects on you? What emotions do you feel now as you recall it?

“To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.” – Lewis B. Smedes

We will find it easier to forgive those who hurt us if they recognize their fault, express their regret, and decide never to repeat the offense again. We can go to the offender (either by ourselves or in the company of another), objectively describe the pain we have experienced (“When you did this, I felt this”), and see if these conditions are met, but the fact is they may not be met. The offender may not be willing to admit that their actions or words were hurtful, or may not want to talk about the incident or the breakdown of the relationship.

The unwillingness of an offender to accept responsibility or to express regret does not prevent us from moving towards our destination of forgiveness. Forgiveness involves a change of heart that is not dependent on the attitudes or actions of the offender; it is an internal process. If we claim that we cannot forgive the other because they have not owned their part in the matter or expressed appropriate regret, we give them power over us by letting them block our path to wholeness and healing.  

• Do you wish to confront the person who has injured you? What do you expect would happen if you did?

Forgiving Ourselves 

People in distress often tend to blame themselves. They may despise themselves for having contributed to the painful event or for having failed to prevent it. They may feel humiliated or overwhelmed by shame and guilt because their shortcomings have been exposed. They may even continue to persecute themselves after the offense is over (“I should have…I was so stupid…I always do this…” are ways of blaming ourselves and further undermining our self-esteem).

If we recognize these critical voices within ourselves, we can challenge them and offer ourselves the balm of kindness and compassion. We will need to forgive ourselves before we can effectively forgive the other.

• Can you offer forgiveness to yourself? What words could you say to yourself to help heal this wound?

Understanding the Other

We can only take this step when we have stopped being preoccupied with our own pain. If that is not the case, we should return to the earlier steps of resolving to set out on the path towards forgiveness, naming the offense and describing its effect on us, sharing our pain with another, and forgiving ourselves. Only then will we be ready to change our perception of the person who has hurt us.

When we have been hurt, we are often inclined to see our offender in the most negative light – as loathsome, deceitful, unfaithful, harmful, irresponsible, etc.  When we view the offender in this way, we stop seeing him as a person who can change and bind him to this painful event forever. We may then lose sight of our own weaknesses and flaws and assign all the blame to the other person. Needless to say, this will limit our ability to forgive.

Understanding those who have offended us does not mean excusing them or exempting them from blame. It is instead an effort to see them in a clearer light, to recognize that they are a mystery to us that can never be fully fathomed, and to appreciate some of the factors that may have caused them to act or speak the way they did. If we can put ourselves in their place, we may be able to begin to understand the motives behind their actions and discover within ourselves a measure of sympathy for them that will allow us to move closer to forgiveness. Of course, we will never reach a complete understanding. In the end we will have to entrust these persons to God, who alone can penetrate the mystery of their hearts.

• What do you know about the person who wronged you, or about the circumstances, that might help you better understand their hurtful words or actions?
• If you cannot understand this person, can you entrust them to God? 

“When a deep injury is done us, we will never recover until we forgive.” – Alan Paton

Even in the most difficult circumstances of our lives, we can often recognize the grace of God at work. God’s work is to bring life out of death, joy out of sorrow, healing out of pain, and hope out of defeat. At this place on the path towards forgiveness, we might be able to imagine what we could learn or how we could grow from this painful experience. We may be able to discover a positive outcome (or potential outcome) that will allow us to recall the event(s) in a more hopeful way. Perhaps we can say, “I’ve learned to say ‘no’ when my values are being compromised” or “I now have more compassion for others who are in a similar situation” or “I’ve developed some practical ways to respond if this comes up again.”

At this point we may be able to imagine a brighter future. The pain surrounding the offense no longer seems all-consuming because our perspective has changed. We may still bear the scars of the offense, but they are no longer raw, gaping wounds. They are not as sensitive or painful to the touch as they once were.

A Gift, not an Obligation

If I imagine forgiving my offender as an obligation placed upon me by a rigid or demanding God (a God, perhaps, who waits to forgive me until I have forgiven others), I will find it difficult to forgive others freely and generously. But if I have known and accepted forgiveness from God as an unmerited gift springing from God’s generosity and love, I may well find within myself the same generous capacity to forgive the one who has hurt me. “We love because he first loved us,” writes the author of 1 John, and so we might also say, “We forgive because he first forgave us.” In Luke 7, Jesus praises a woman who is able to love much because she has been forgiven much, and this serves as a reminder to us that we, too, have been graciously forgiven our offenses.

If we have known the God who (like the father in Luke 15:11-24) runs down the road to meet us and embrace us when we have come straggling home, soiled with sin and guilt; then we may be able to find within ourselves the same capacity for generosity, compassion and forgiveness towards those who have wronged us. But if we have not yet discovered this extravagant loving forgiveness of God in our own lives, we may (like the unforgiving creditor in Matthew 18:23-35) find it difficult to extend mercy toward those who have offended or hurt us.

Forgiveness is a gift of love which we receive from God, and can then pass on to others.

• When and how have you received the gift of forgiveness in your life?
• Can your knowledge of the extravagant loving forgiveness of God feed your forgiveness of others?

“There is no love without forgiveness, and there is no forgiveness without love.” – Bryant H. McGill

We may find ourselves pausing at the threshold of forgiveness because we wrongfully assume that forgiveness necessarily leads to reconciliation, and we are reluctant to open ourselves to further abuse. But forgiveness is not synonymous with reconciliation. Although reconciliation may be the normal and desirable outcome of forgiveness, we should not imagine that it implies a return to the way things were before the offense. When a serious offense has occurred it is impossible to resume the former relationship because it has been forever changed. At most we can try to re-imagine it or give it some other form. But we must not assume that, in every case, forgiveness will lead to reconciliation. In many cases, it would be foolhardy or even dangerous to resume the relationship.

Forgiveness is possible even when reconciliation is not. Granting forgiveness helps us to recover our inner peace and freedom, it releases us from the burdens of resentment and the desire for revenge, and it restores our self-esteem. It can help us to understand and accept the person who has hurt us, discover positive benefits in the situation, and enable us to wish them well. Our ability to forgive may even lead the offender to a change of heart.

Granting forgiveness does not magically resolve the difficulties in a relationship; nor does it guarantee that the offender will not repeat the offending actions. But it can prove beneficial to us and further our growth and transformation in love. It is also the essence of the new community which Christ has called into being, as Paul reminds the Colossian Christians:

“As God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience. Bear with one another and, if anyone has a complaint against another, forgive each other, just as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts…and be thankful.” (Col. 3:12-15)

“You will know that forgiveness has begun when you recall those who hurt you and feel the power to wish them well.” – Lewis B. Smedes

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Very helpful brother David, thanks so much

Thank you Br. David Vryhof for this very inspiring reflection. Stay safe Br. David and an abundance of special touches of Jesus and Mary’s love upon you always.

Wonderful reflection indeed. It is so enriching and appealing . Be blessed Br. David Vryhof

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Learn Why God's Forgiveness Is Stronger Than Your Deepest Regrets

• Dr. James Emery White Serioustimes.org
• Updated May 03, 2024

I don’t know who needs to read this; I just know that many do.

Do you know what the unforgivable sin is?  

The only unforgivable sin is rejecting the forgiveness of God.

So embrace that forgiveness.

Here’s what God promises about that forgiveness. First, God promises to forget about your sin. This is what the Bible records God saying through the prophet Jeremiah: “ I’ll wipe the slate clean for each of them. I’ll forget they ever sinned!”  ( Jeremiah 31:34 , Msg).

That’s right. When you are forgiven, God gets a case of holy amnesia. You may have gone to God a thousand times to ask for forgiveness of a sin that He forgot about after the first time you asked Him to forgive you. Or maybe you’ve repeated a particular sin over and over, and you go to God and say, “God, I’m so sorry—I did it again.” And He’s asking, “Did what?”

When God forgives, He chooses to forget.

But that’s not all.

God doesn’t just forget; He promises to cleanse you from it. In His eyes, forgiveness completely purifies and cleanses you. Read these words from God through the prophet Isaiah:

"Though your sins are like scarlet, I will make them as white as snow. Though they are red like crimson, I will make them as white as wool." - Isaiah 1:18 , NLT

But that’s not all. There’s more. God promises to remove your sin from your record. This is how the Bible puts it:

"He has removed our sins as far from us  as the east is from the west." -  Psalm 103:12 , NLT

So drink from the well of forgiveness and take that scarlet letter off your chest. This is what it means to have what Christ did on the cross applied to our lives.

... cleanses us from our sin,

... and removes our sin from the record.

As the apostle John reminds us:

Our actions will show that we belong to the truth, so we will be confident when we stand before God. Even if we feel guilty, God is greater than our feelings, and he knows everything . (I John 3:19-20 , NLT)

Like I said, I don’t know who needed to hear this,

... I just know some of you did.

Photo Credit: ©Unsplash/Julio Rionaldo 

James Emery White is the founding and senior pastor of Mecklenburg Community Church in Charlotte, NC, and a former professor of theology and culture at Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary, where he also served as their fourth president. His latest book, Hybrid Church: Rethinking the Church for a Post-Christian Digital Age , is now  available on Amazon or from your favorite bookseller. To enjoy a free subscription to the Church & Culture blog, visit  churchandculture.org where you can view past blogs in our archive, read the latest church and culture news from around the world, and listen to the Church & Culture Podcast. Follow Dr. White on  X ,  Facebook , and  Instagram at @JamesEmeryWhite.

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The Grace of God’s Forgiveness

Thanks much Pastor! Amen.

Amen Pastor Amen .. Hallelujah! The personal experience of embracing The Grace of God’s Forgiveness.

Amen Pastor! I’m thankful for the Grace of God’s forgiveness.

Thank- you Pastor for this devotional-The Grace of forgiveness, a powerful Word

Amen ! Pastor I am thankful that God Grace is greater...than all my sins.Excellent Devontial!!

Amen!!! What a great God we serve!

Thank you so much for expounding on this scripture that I know and pray frequently, really daily! With my struggles I really needed to hear this today. May God continue to bless and use to help others like myself in our/this Christian walk.

66 Forgiveness Essay: Examples, Titles, & Thesis Statement

A forgiveness essay is an exciting yet challenging task. In our article, you can find good forgiveness essay examples in literature, history, religion, and other spheres

📝 Writing a Forgiveness Theme Statement

🏆 best forgiveness essay examples, 🔍 simple forgiveness titles for essay, 💡 interesting forgiveness essay examples.

In your forgiveness essay, focus on different aspects of forgiveness. Some good forgiveness titles for the essay reveal themes of revenge, justice, and personal forgiveness. You can write an excellent reflective or argumentative essay on forgiveness – it is a versatile topic.

Regardless of your forgiveness essay’s specific topic and type, you should develop a strong thesis statement. Below we will provide recommendations on making a good forgiveness theme statement. This will help you come up with a solid base and arguments to prove your position.

Check these tips to make a powerful forgiveness thesis statemen:

• Determine the primary idea. What are you trying to prove? Can anything be forgiven, or are there cases when it’s not possible? Introduce your one main idea and the angle from which you will look at it. You can also include some facts or opinions about the acuteness of the topic.
• Work out your argumentation. It is crucial to have a firm structure in your forgiveness essay. You need to support the thesis statement with several arguments and evidence to demonstrate the consistency of your paper.
• Think of the opposing views. Every argument has a counterargument. When working on your forgiveness theme statement, always keep an opposite thesis statement in mind. Having considered counter positions, you gain additional arguments for your position.
• Don’t quote others in your thesis statement. A thesis statement is the first and foremost chance to introduce your point of view. Use your own strongest words to reach a reader. This is where they get the first impression about the whole work.

We also have lots of other tips on developing A+ thesis statements. Check our free thesis statement generator to discover more information and get a perfect forgiveness theme statement.

• Divine and Human Forgiveness in “Rime of the Ancient Mariner” By Samuel Taylor Coleridge After killing the albatross who was suppose to provide them with wind, all the people in the ship died but he managed to survive because he had asked God to forgive him all the sins […]
• Hamlet and Forgiveness: A Personal Reflection Some of the most prominent themes in the story are the ideas of mutual forgiveness, people’s motivation to be proactive and take risks, and their willingness to forgive and ask for forgiveness.
• Christ’s Atonement and the Concept of Forgiveness This study will connect the atonement of Jesus Christ and attitudes towards forgiveness through the revision of the current church, Love and God’s commandment to forgive.
• Service Recovery and Customer Forgiveness Studies suggest that after apologizing to customers plus taking responsibility for the problem, getting to the root of the problem is very important to prevent such occurrences in the future. Getting to the root of […]
• Racial Inequality Targeted Student Loan Forgiveness Programs The research into this topic seems highly significant as the reduction of racial inequality was one of the most debated topics in the U.S.for the last several decades.
• Forgiveness in the Christian Texts and the World Today The apostle calls upon the church’s people to stop the punishment of the wrongdoer and forgive, comfort, and affirm their love for him. It instructs Muslims to follow God and forgive others instead of following […]
• Philosophy of Forgiveness I believe that if anyone had gone through all the pain and horror that Simon had, and was asked to forgive Karl, the instinct, and most humane reaction at that moment would be to strongly […]
• Forgiveness for Workplace Conflict Resolution The problem with the relationship between the two workers is that Jake feels that Monica is a relatively malicious individual. In the outlined scenario, Jake is doing all that he can to avoid dealing with […]
• The Effects of Forgiveness Therapy After gathering the relevant data, the researchers compared the recovery of the participants to their controls to determine the effects of forgiveness therapy.
• Self-Forgiveness: The Step Child of Forgiveness Research Other than the similarities and the differences, the two types of forgiveness relate to each other as self-forgiveness facilitates interpersonal forgiveness, this is through allowance of one to identify with one’s offender.
• The Amish Philosophy of Forgiveness It is important to note that the immediate forgiveness of the enemy does not mean that the Amish will let the perpetrators of crime go free.
• Review: “Interventions Studies on Forgiveness: A Meta-analysis” by Baskin T. and Enright R. In the church, members come to the pastor with a variety of social and psychological issues. The first step the pastor should undertake is to sympathise with the victims.
• Self-Forgiveness as the Path to Learning to Forgive the Others The key issues that the given research responds to or, at least, attempts to solve, are the definition of self-forgiveness, the relation between self-forgiveness and interpersonal forgiveness, and the means to differentiate between self-forgiveness and […]
• The Effects of Forgiveness Therapy on Depression, Anxiety and Posttraumatic Stress for Women After Spousal Emotional Abuse Enright forgiveness model applied in the study proved effective since it systematically addressed the forgiveness process identified the negative attributes caused by the abuse, and prepared the women for positive responses.
• Forgiveness & Reconciliation: The Differing Perspectives of Psychologists and Christian Theologians Based on the research design there is evidence of measures put in place to control against most of these biases which strengthens the study findings; this is the strength to the study.
• Forgiveness and Reconciliation Critique Availability of literature; as stated in the literature though the area of forgiveness is new in the field of psychology, but there is enough literature to cover the study.
• Forgiveness in Simon Wiesenthal’s Work The Sunflower Taking into account the major themes of the book The Sunflower, one is to make a conclusion that such response to atrocities as forgiveness is considered to be the key aspect of humanity.
• Forgiveness in Martin Luther’s Movement for Rights Blacks The bible teachings tell us that God exists in the holy trinity and the only way to forgive others is for us to be able to forgive our own transgressions.
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• The Monster’s Lack of Forgiveness in Frankenstein, a Book by Mary Shelley
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• The Renaissance Figure That Wonders the Lands in Hope of Bring Forgiveness in the Pardoner and His Tale
• The Impact of Acceptance, Tolerance, and Forgiveness in Frankenstein, a Novel by Mary Shelley
• Racism, Redemption, Forgiveness and Hope in Minor Miracle, a Poem by Marilyn Nelson
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• Penalties and Exclusion in the Rescheduling and Forgiveness of International Loans
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Eight Keys to Forgiveness

When another person hurts us, it can upend our lives.

Sometimes the hurt is very deep, such as when a spouse or a parent betrays our trust , or when we are victims of crime, or when we’ve been harshly bullied . Anyone who has suffered a grievous hurt knows that when our inner world is badly disrupted, it’s difficult to concentrate on anything other than our turmoil or pain. When we hold on to hurt, we are emotionally and cognitively hobbled, and our relationships suffer.

Forgiveness is strong medicine for this. When life hits us hard, there is nothing as effective as forgiveness for healing deep wounds. I would not have spent the last 30 years of my life studying forgiveness if I were not convinced of this.

Many people have misconceptions about what forgiveness really means—and they may eschew it. Others may want to forgive, but wonder whether or not they truly can. Forgiveness does not necessarily come easily; but it is possible for many of us to achieve, if we have the right tools and are willing to put in the effort.

Below is an outline of the basic steps involved in following a path of forgiveness, adapted from my new book, 8 Keys to Forgiveness . As you read through these steps, think about how you might adapt them to your own life.

1. Know what forgiveness is and why it matters

Forgiveness is about goodness, about extending mercy to those who’ve harmed us, even if they don’t “deserve” it. It is not about finding excuses for the offending person’s behavior or pretending it didn’t happen. Nor is there a quick formula you can follow. Forgiveness is a process with many steps that often proceeds in a non-linear fashion.

But it’s well worth the effort. Working on forgiveness can help us increase our self-esteem and give us a sense of inner strength and safety. It can reverse the lies that we often tell ourselves when someone has hurt us deeply—lies like, I am defeated or I’m not worthy . Forgiveness can heal us and allow us to move on in life with meaning and purpose. Forgiveness matters, and we will be its primary beneficiary.

Studies have shown that forgiving others produces strong psychological benefits for the one who forgives. It has been shown to decrease depression, anxiety, unhealthy anger, and the symptoms of PTSD. But we don’t just forgive to help ourselves. Forgiveness can lead to psychological healing, yes; but, in its essence, it is not something about you or done for you. It is something you extend toward another person, because you recognize, over time, that it is the best response to the situation.

2. Become “forgivingly fit”

More on forgiveness.

Read and watch Fred Luskin explain "What is Forgiveness?"

Read three evolutionary truths about forgiveness and revenge .

Discover how to overcome barriers to forgiveness .

How forgiving are you? Take our quiz !

Try this forgiveness practice , based on Enright's work.

To practice forgiveness, it helps if you have worked on positively changing your inner world by learning to be what I call “forgivingly fit.” Just as you would start slowly with a new physical exercise routine, it helps if you build up your forgiving heart muscles slowly, incorporating regular “workouts” into your everyday life.

You can start becoming more fit by making a commitment to do no harm—in other words, making a conscious effort not to talk disparagingly about those who’ve hurt you. You don’t have to say good things; but, if you refrain from talking negatively, it will feed the more forgiving side of your mind and heart.

You can also make a practice of recognizing that every person is unique, special, and irreplaceable. You may come to this through religious beliefs or a humanist philosophy or even through your belief in evolution. It’s important to cultivate this mindset of valuing our common humanity, so that it becomes harder to discount someone who has harmed you as unworthy.

You can show love in small ways in everyday encounters—like smiling at a harried grocery cashier or taking time to listen to a child. Giving love when it’s unnecessary helps to build the love muscle, making it easier to show compassion toward everyone. If you practice small acts of forgiveness and mercy—extending care when someone harms you—in everyday life, this too will help. Perhaps you can refrain from honking when someone cuts you off in traffic, or hold your tongue when your spouse snaps at you and extend a hug instead.

Sometimes pride and power can weaken your efforts to forgive by making you feel entitled and inflated, so that you hang onto your resentment as a noble cause. Try to catch yourself when you are acting from that place, and choose forgiveness or mercy, instead. If you need inspiration, it can help to seek out stories of mercy in the world by going to the International Forgiveness Institute website: www.internationalforgiveness.com.

3. Address your inner pain

It’s important to figure out who has hurt you and how. This may seem obvious; but not every action that causes you suffering is unjust. For example, you don’t need to forgive your child or your spouse for being imperfect, even if their imperfections are inconvenient for you.

To become clearer, you can look carefully at the people in your life—your parents, siblings, peers, spouse, coworkers, children, and even yourself—and rate how much they have hurt you. Perhaps they have exercised power over you or withheld love; or maybe they have physically harmed you. These hurts have contributed to your inner pain and need to be acknowledged. Doing this will give you an idea of who needs forgiveness in your life and provide a place to start.

There are many forms of emotional pain; but the common forms are anxiety, depression, unhealthy anger, lack of trust, self-loathing or low self-esteem, an overall negative worldview, and a lack of confidence in one’s ability to change. All of these harms can be addressed by forgiveness; so it’s important to identify the kind of pain you are suffering from and to acknowledge it. The more hurt you have incurred, the more important it is to forgive, at least for the purpose of experiencing emotional healing.

You may be able to do this accounting on your own, or you may need the help of a therapist. However you approach looking at your pain be sure you do it in an environment that feels safe and supportive.

4. Develop a forgiving mind through empathy

Scientists have studied what happens in the brain when we think about forgiving and have discovered that, when people successfully imagine forgiving someone (in a hypothetical situation), they show increased activity in the neural circuits responsible for empathy. This tells us that empathy is connected to forgiveness and is an important step in the process.

If you examine some of the details in the life of the person who harmed you, you can often see more clearly what wounds he carries and start to develop empathy for him. First, try to imagine him as an innocent child, needing love and support. Did he get that from the parents? Research has shown that if an infant does not receive attention and love from primary caregivers, then he will have a weak attachment, which can damage trust. It may prevent him from ever getting close to others and set a trajectory of loneliness and conflict for the rest of his life.

You may be able to put an entire narrative together for the person who hurt you—from early child through adulthood—or just imagine it from what you know. You may be able to see her physical frailties and psychological suffering, and begin to understand the common humanity that you share. You may recognize her as a vulnerable person who was wounded and wounded you in return. Despite what she may have done to hurt you, you realize that she did not deserve to suffer, either.

Recognizing that we all carry wounds in our hearts can help open the door to forgiveness.

5. Find meaning in your suffering

When we suffer a great deal, it is important that we find meaning in what we have endured. Without seeing meaning, a person can lose a sense of purpose, which can lead to hopelessness and a despairing conclusion that there is no meaning to life itself. That doesn’t mean we look for suffering in order to grow or try to find goodness in another’s bad actions. Instead, we try to see how our suffering has changed us in a positive way.

Even as one suffers, it’s possible to develop short-term and sometimes long-range goals in life. Some people begin to think about how they can use their suffering to cope, because they’ve become more resilient or brave. They may also realize that their suffering has altered their perspective regarding what is important in life, changing their long-range goals for themselves.

To find meaning is not to diminish your pain or to say, I’ll just make the best of it or All things happen for a reason. You must always take care to address the woundedness in yourself and to recognize the injustice of the experience, or forgiveness will be shallow.

Still, there are many ways to find meaning in our suffering. Some may choose to focus more on the beauty of the world or decide to give service to others in need. Some may find meaning by speaking their truth or by strengthening their inner resolve. If I were to give one answer, it would be that we should use our suffering to become more loving and to pass that love onto others. Finding meaning, in and of itself, is helpful for finding direction in forgiveness.

6. When forgiveness is hard, call upon other strengths

Forgiveness is always hard when we are dealing with deep injustices from others. I have known people who refuse to use the word forgiveness because it just makes them so angry. That’s OK—we all have our own timelines for when we can be merciful. But if you want to forgive and are finding it hard, it might help to call upon other resources.

First remember that if you are struggling with forgiveness, that doesn’t mean you’re a failure at forgiveness. Forgiveness is a process that takes time, patience, and determination. Try not to be harsh on yourself, but be gentle and foster a sense of quiet within, an inner acceptance of yourself. Try to respond to yourself as you would to someone whom you love deeply.

Surround yourself with good and wise people who support you and who have the patience to allow you time to heal in your own way. Also, practice humility—not in the sense of putting yourself down, but in realizing that we are all capable of imperfection and suffering.

Try to develop courage and patience in yourself to help you in the journey. Also, if you practice bearing small slights against you without lashing out, you give a gift to everyone—not only to the other person, but to everyone whom that person may harm in the future because of your anger. You can help end the cycle of inflicting pain on others.

If you are still finding it hard to forgive, you can choose to practice with someone who is easier to forgive—maybe someone who hurt you in a small way, rather than deeply. Alternatively, it can be better to focus on forgiving the person who is at the root of your pain—maybe a parent who was abusive, or a spouse who betrayed you. If this initial hurt impacts other parts of your life and other relationships, it may be necessary to start there.

7. Forgive yourself

Most of us tend to be harder on ourselves than we are on others and we struggle to love ourselves. If you are not feeling lovable because of actions you’ve taken, you may need to work on self-forgiveness and offer to yourself what you offer to others who have hurt you: a sense of inherent worth, despite your actions.

In self-forgiveness, you honor yourself as a person, even if you are imperfect. If you’ve broken your personal standards in a serious way, there is a danger of sliding into self-loathing. When this happens, you may not take good care of yourself—you might overeat or oversleep or start smoking or engage in other forms of “self-punishment.” You need to recognize this and move toward self-compassion. Soften your heart toward yourself.

After you have been able to self-forgive, you will also need to engage in seeking forgiveness from others whom you’ve harmed and right the wrongs as best as you can. It’s important to be prepared for the possibility that the other person may not be ready to forgive you and to practice patience and humility. But, a sincere apology, free of conditions and expectations, will go a long way toward your receiving forgiveness in the end.

8. Develop a forgiving heart

When we overcome suffering, we gain a more mature understanding of what it means to be humble, courageous, and loving in the world. We may be moved to create an atmosphere of forgiveness in our homes and workplaces, to help others who’ve been harmed overcome their suffering, or to protect our communities from a cycle of hatred and violence. All of these choices can lighten the heart and bring joy to one’s life.

Some people may believe that love for another who’s harmed you is not possible. But, I’ve found that many people who forgive eventually find a way to open their hearts. If you shed bitterness and put love in its place, and then repeat this with many, many other people, you become freed to love more widely and deeply. This kind of transformation can create a legacy of love that will live on long after you’re gone.

About the Author

Robert Enright

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• May 5, 2023

Forgiveness is a topic of interest and study in both science and faith traditions

Global study shows that when forgiveness is taught, practiced and achieved, it promotes better mental health and well-being and offers a groundbreaking forgiveness workbook in 6 different languages..

Many faith traditions place a strong emphasis on forgiveness as a central component of their teachings and practices. For example, forgiveness is a central tenet in many religious texts, such as the Bible, the Quran, and the Buddhist sutras. In these traditions, forgiveness is seen as a way to promote healing, reconciliation, and spiritual growth.

There is also evidence to suggest that faith can play a role in promoting forgiveness . For example, studies have found that individuals who have strong religious beliefs and practices are more likely to forgive others, even in difficult and challenging situations.

From a scientific perspective, research has shown that forgiveness is associated with a range of psychological, social, and physical benefits, including improved mental health, reduced stress, improved relationships, and better physical health outcomes.

Studies have even shown that forgiveness has a positive impact on academics, lower blood pressure, better sleep and less anxiety. According to Andrew Serazin, president of the Templeton World Charity Foundation , says research they have funded validates the science behind forgiveness, “It helps the people who are doing the forgiving. It helps inside your own skin.”

In some cases, science and faith perspectives on forgiveness may overlap and reinforce each other. For example, both science and faith traditions emphasize the importance of empathy, compassion, and understanding in the forgiveness process.

A recent global study into forgiveness, funded by Templeton, focused on the emotional benefit of the process of forgiving, focusing on what they call the REACH method of forgiveness in 6 different languages. Dr. Everett Worthingon, lead researcher, developed this model to understand the links between mental, physical, and spiritual benefits of forgiveness.

R EACH Method:

Reach: (r) recall the hurt; (e) empathize with the offender, give the; (a) altruistic gift of forgiveness; (c) commit, and (h) hold onto the forgiveness., watch this video to learn more about the templeton world charity foundation's work on forgiveness and human flourishing:.

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3 Lessons from David’s Fall and Forgiveness

More By Jim Newheiser

As we face our sin, we have to navigate between two unbiblical ditches. One is despairing that our sin is beyond forgiveness. The other is carelessly thinking we can violate God’s commands without experiencing painful repercussions.

The fall of David in 2 Samuel 11 is one of the saddest accounts in all of Scripture. Yet it also has great value as it offers us hope about the greatness of God’s forgiving grace—while also warning us about the terrible consequences of sin, even forgiven sin.

As we reach 2 Samuel 11, David is at his pinnacle. His throne has been established, his enemies have been subdued, and preparations are being made for building the temple in Jerusalem. Then suddenly David falls into heinous sin when he steals a man’s wife and then has her husband murdered as part of the coverup (2 Sam. 11). The Lord then sends the prophet Nathan to confront David over his sin (2 Sam. 12). David repents. God forgives. But David still has to suffer the consequences of his sin.

There are at least three practical lessons we can learn from the aftermath of David’s sin in 2 Samuel 12.

1. God’s Amazing Grace to Those Who Repent

When David is confronted by Nathan, he confesses: “I have sinned against the LORD” (2 Sam. 12:13). Then Nathan the prophet declares, “The LORD also has put away your sin; you shall not die” (v. 13). God’s forgiveness of David includes:

• Temporal judicial forgiveness. The Lord sets aside the requirement of the law that murderers and adulterers be put to death (Lev. 20:10; 24:17). David’s life is spared, and his throne is not taken from him.
• Spiritual forgiveness. God reconciles David to himself. David later writes, “Blessed is the one whose transgression is forgiven, whose sin is covered. Blessed is the man against whom the LORD counts no iniquity” (Ps. 32:1–2). Paul later uses the example of God’s forgiveness of David to show that God’s way of salvation has always been to the unworthy, by grace through faith (Rom. 4:4–8).

While I’m saddened by the account of David’s great sin, I’m thankful that these events are recorded in Scripture.

While I’m saddened by the account of David’s great sin, I’m thankful these events are recorded in Scripture. What wonderful hope God’s grace offers to sinners like us, especially when we’re aware of how shameful our sins are. God justifies the ungodly (Rom. 4:5). He saves the sexually immoral and murderers who repent (including abusers and those who have been involved in abortion). God invites sinners to run to him for compassion and abundant pardon (Isa. 55:6–7)

2. Forgiven Sin Still Has Consequences

While it’s wonderful to read of God’s lavish forgiveness, we should also pay careful attention to the painful and fitting consequences the Lord brought upon David for his sin. We’re told David’s chastisement was necessary both to uphold the Lord’s reputation (2 Sam. 12:14) and also to teach future generations that sin has consequences (1 Cor. 10:11; Rom. 15:4). As I’ve studied the latter part of David’s life, I’ve often wondered if it would’ve been easier on him not to have lived to see the horrible events of his final years (recorded in 2 Sam. 13–24).

Just consider how God’s words through Nathan played out:

• “The sword shall never depart from your house” (2 Sam. 12:10). God shatters the peace and stability David had spent a lifetime establishing, as his kingdom is torn apart by two civil wars.
• “I will raise up evil against you out of your own house” (2 Sam. 12:11–12). The shameful sexual sin and murderous violence in which David engaged secretly is practiced openly by his sons, Amnon and Absalom.
• “The child . . . shall die.” (2 Sam. 12:14). The baby conceived by David’s sin died seven days after he was born (2 Sam. 12:15–23).

Many professing Christians take sin far too lightly. The example of David should remind us that God doesn’t.

Many professing Christians take sin far too lightly. The example of David should remind us that God doesn’t. As Calvin asked, “If God did not spare his servant David, what right do we have to expect to be exempted?” I have counseled sexually immoral believers who have contracted a disease and were divorced by their spouses. I’ve known child abusers who have gone to prison. I’ve counseled men who lost their jobs for looking at porn at work.

God forgives sin with great grace and at great price. Such love should motivate us to flee from sin and pursue righteousness (2 Tim. 2:22). But if love won’t, then the consequences of sin might (1 Tim. 5:20).

3. We Need a Better King Than David

This is a central theme in 1 and 2 Samuel. While David surpasses those who came before (and after) him as leaders in Israel, he still falls short of what God’s people need. While his good qualities as the man after God’s own heart point ahead to Christ, his fall into sin reminds us that we need a worthier king.

Jesus, the Son of David, is the flawless leader who never failed when he was tested. He had no sins to cover up. He never once abused his power. Israel’s daughters were safe with him. Moreover, it was because of God’s plan to put Jesus forward as a propitiation 1,000 years later that he was able to forgive the sins of Old Testament saints like David (Rom. 3:25–26), along with all the rest of us who fall short of God’s standard (Rom. 3:23–24).

Wonderfully Balanced

Scripture is wonderfully balanced. While God’s grace encourages sinners to turn to him for forgiveness, his chastisement should also encourage us not to take sin lightly (Heb. 3:15; 12:5). David’s example reminds us that forgiven sin still has consequences, but that bitter consequences don’t mean we’re not forgiven.

Forgiven sin still has consequences, [but] bitter consequences don’t mean we’re not forgiven.

Behold the kindness and severity of God as you read 2 Samuel 12. Don’t doubt God’s willingness to forgive even the greatest sins, and d on’t test God by indulging in sin while assuming you’ll be able to repent later. Many other sinners (including Saul and many of the kings who followed David) were hardened in their rebellion and did not find repentance. Don’t use the pretext of forgiveness to rationalize your sin. Sin is never worth it.

Is there enough evidence for us to believe the Gospels?

Jim Newheiser (DMin, Westminster Seminary California) is the director of the Christian counseling program and associate professor of Christian counseling and pastoral theology at Reformed Theological Seminary Charlotte . He is also executive director for the Institute for Biblical Counseling and Discipleship . He counsels married couples, teaches counseling courses, practical theology courses, and has written several resources on biblical counseling, ministry, and marriage. Jim is married to Caroline, and they have three adult children.

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Teaching Our Children about Forgiveness

Parents are parables. Our lives tell stories to our children. The great gospel story that we hope our lives will tell is one of forgiveness. God forgives us in Christ, and a living witness of God’s forgiveness is a heart of forgiveness in us—a heart that not only receives, but gives. We must begin teaching our children about forgiveness with the gospel, but we must also become parables of forgiveness for them with our lives.

One of the most striking parables about forgiveness is told in the negative: the parable of the unforgiving servant. In the parable, a servant who owes much is forgiven much, only to turn around and demand from another the relatively little that was owed to him (see Matt. 18:21–35). This parable stresses how incongruous it is for the forgiven not to forgive, but the fact that Jesus stresses such an incongruity implicitly teaches us that we first become forgivers by being forgiven. That is why we teach forgiveness to our children by starting with the good news that we are forgiven because of the incarnation, death, resurrection, and ascension of Christ.

The Heidelberg Catechism in its exposition of the Apostles’ Creed helps us understand the extent of our forgiveness in the gospel:

Q. What do you believe concerning “the forgiveness of sins”? A. I believe that God, because of Christ’s satisfaction, will no longer remember any of my sins or my sinful nature which I need to struggle against all my life. Rather, by his grace God grants me the righteousness of Christ that I may never come into judgment. (Q&A 56)

As outlined here, our forgiveness is lavish—secured in Christ and forever. The next lesson for our children is that if this is our forgiveness in the gospel, then so it should be when it comes to our forgiveness of others.

We teach our children that their forgiveness of others should look like their own:

• Our forgiveness should be because of Christ, in honor of Him, just as God forgives us “because of Christ’s satisfaction.”
• Our forgiveness should be forgetful, as we stop bringing past sins to mind, just as God “will no longer remember” our sins.
• Our forgiveness should be consistent, just as God forgives “my sinful nature which I need to struggle against all my life.”
• Our forgiveness should be gracious, as we let go of our demands, just as God “by his grace” grants us Christ’s righteousness.
• Our forgiveness should free others from fear of our judgment, as we stop holding past sins over them, just as we “may never come into judgment” again before God.

Here’s the scary thing as a parent: once our children know the gospel and what forgiveness is, they will be able to spot incongruity in us when we are acting like unforgiving servants. One way we fall into this as parents is bringing up the past with our children. We might say things like “You always do this . . . ” to guilt, voice our frustrations, or manipulate obedience from them. When we speak like this, we inadvertently become parables of unforgiving servants.

But we ought not to lose hope. We can be positive parables of forgiveness. Parents who are parables of forgiving servants are open about forgiveness, and our children learn the most about forgiveness when we forgive each other.

Parents, ask your children for forgiveness regularly. They have hearts that react to sin and injustice, just like you. Do not let unconfessed sins come between you, and when your children sin against you, encourage them also to ask for forgiveness. This involves not being harsh with them so that they, in turn, feel comfortable talking about their sins. When they are young, name their sin for them and teach them how to ask for forgiveness beyond saying, “I’m sorry.” There is something so much stronger communicated about sin and reconciliation when we teach them to ask, “Will you forgive me?”

When your children struggle to forgive someone, pray with them about it. Even when your children are little and may not have an awareness of begrudging anyone, pray daily with them that they might develop hearts of forgiveness. Prayer is one of the best ways to communicate indirectly with their hearts. It’s especially helpful when they are not inclined to listen to your direct instruction. Use prayer as an indirect route that their hearts may be softened by the Spirit.

Family is wonderful. It can also, at times, be volatile. Establish a regular rhythm of prayer together as a family. This can be as easy as praying at mealtimes. This regular rhythm, even if it is only at one meal a day, gives us an opportunity to go before the Lord whenever inevitable tensions arise. When a fight has just broken out, Jesus calls us to be reconciled. One way to clear the air is to ask for help in prayer. Something about the ordinariness of a mealtime prayer of thanksgiving makes such requests surprising but, most importantly, ordinary.

We should be open about forgiveness with our children, and once such an open space is created in our homes, we need to diligently guard the peace that reconciliation brings and no longer sin against each other. But when we do, we forgive.

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100 Bible Verses about Gods Forgiveness

1 john 1:9 esv / 1,483 helpful votes helpful not helpful.

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

Ephesians 1:7 ESV / 1,122 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace,

Colossians 3:13 ESV / 992 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.

Ephesians 4:32 ESV / 924 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.

Mark 11:25 ESV / 873 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.”

Matthew 6:14-15 ESV / 868 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.

Matthew 18:21-22 ESV / 794 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.

Luke 6:37 ESV / 791 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

“Judge not, and you will not be judged; condemn not, and you will not be condemned; forgive, and you will be forgiven;

Isaiah 1:18 ESV / 755 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

“Come now, let us reason together, says the Lord : though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red like crimson, they shall become like wool.

Isaiah 55:7 ESV / 648 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts; let him return to the Lord , that he may have compassion on him, and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon.

Acts 2:38 ESV / 584 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

And Peter said to them, “Repent and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins, and you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.

Matthew 6:12 ESV / 563 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.

Luke 17:3-4 ESV / 555 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Pay attention to yourselves! If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him, and if he sins against you seven times in the day, and turns to you seven times, saying, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive him.”

Acts 3:19 ESV / 553 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Repent therefore, and turn back, that your sins may be blotted out,

Luke 23:34 ESV / 551 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

And Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” And they cast lots to divide his garments.

Matthew 6:14 ESV / 539 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you,

Daniel 9:9 ESV / 518 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

To the Lord our God belong mercy and forgiveness, for we have rebelled against him

Colossians 1:13-14 ESV / 486 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of his beloved Son, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.

Proverbs 17:9 ESV / 486 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Whoever covers an offense seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates close friends.

Psalm 103:12 ESV / 473 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

As far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us.

Romans 3:23 ESV / 471 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,

Matthew 26:28 ESV / 455 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

For this is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins.

Psalm 32:5 ESV / 448 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

I acknowledged my sin to you, and I did not cover my iniquity; I said, “I will confess my transgressions to the Lord ,” and you forgave the iniquity of my sin. Selah

Psalm 86:5 ESV / 433 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

For you, O Lord, are good and forgiving, abounding in steadfast love to all who call upon you.

John 3:16 ESV / 427 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.

2 Chronicles 7:14 ESV / 414 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

If my people who are called by my name humble themselves, and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and heal their land.

Hebrews 10:17 ESV / 384 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Then he adds, “I will remember their sins and their lawless deeds no more.”

Proverbs 28:13 ESV / 384 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy.

Acts 10:43 ESV / 380 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

To him all the prophets bear witness that everyone who believes in him receives forgiveness of sins through his name.”

Ephesians 4:31-32 ESV / 378 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.

Micah 7:18-19 ESV / 378 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Who is a God like you, pardoning iniquity and passing over transgression for the remnant of his inheritance? He does not retain his anger forever, because he delights in steadfast love. He will again have compassion on us; he will tread our iniquities underfoot. You will cast all our sins into the depths of the sea.

2 Corinthians 5:17 ESV / 375 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.

Isaiah 43:25 ESV / 358 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

“I, I am he who blots out your transgressions for my own sake, and I will not remember your sins.

Hebrews 8:12 ESV / 352 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

For I will be merciful toward their iniquities, and I will remember their sins no more.”

Micah 7:18 ESV / 350 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Who is a God like you, pardoning iniquity and passing over transgression for the remnant of his inheritance? He does not retain his anger forever, because he delights in steadfast love.

Matthew 5:23-24 ESV / 345 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

So if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.

Matthew 6:15 ESV / 343 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

But if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.

Proverbs 10:12 ESV / 329 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all offenses.

Isaiah 43:25-26 ESV / 299 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

“I, I am he who blots out your transgressions for my own sake, and I will not remember your sins. Put me in remembrance; let us argue together; set forth your case, that you may be proved right.

Psalm 130:4 ESV / 299 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

But with you there is forgiveness, that you may be feared.

James 5:16 ESV / 295 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.

Ephesians 2:8-9 ESV / 287 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast.

Joel 2:13 ESV / 274 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

And rend your hearts and not your garments.” Return to the Lord your God, for he is gracious and merciful, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love; and he relents over disaster.

Romans 6:23 ESV / 268 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

James 5:14-15 ESV / 267 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer of faith will save the one who is sick, and the Lord will raise him up. And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven.

Matthew 6:9-15 ESV / 265 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Pray then like this: “Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. ...

Romans 8:1 ESV / 264 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.

1 John 2:1 ESV / 263 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

My little children, I am writing these things to you so that you may not sin. But if anyone does sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous.

Ephesians 2:1-22 ESV / 263 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

And you were dead in the trespasses and sins in which you once walked, following the course of this world, following the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in the sons of disobedience— among whom we all once lived in the passions of our flesh, carrying out the desires of the body and the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, like the rest of mankind. But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved— ...

1 John 2:2 ESV / 261 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

He is the propitiation for our sins, and not for ours only but also for the sins of the whole world.

2 Chronicles 30:9 ESV / 261 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

For if you return to the Lord , your brothers and your children will find compassion with their captors and return to this land. For the Lord your God is gracious and merciful and will not turn away his face from you, if you return to him.”

Acts 13:38-39 ESV / 259 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Let it be known to you therefore, brothers, that through this man forgiveness of sins is proclaimed to you, and by him everyone who believes is freed from everything from which you could not be freed by the law of Moses.

1 John 2:12 ESV / 258 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

I am writing to you, little children, because your sins are forgiven for his name's sake.

Luke 17:3 ESV / 258 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Pay attention to yourselves! If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him,

1 Peter 4:8 ESV / 254 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins.

Matthew 5:7 ESV / 250 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

“Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy.

Jeremiah 31:34 ESV / 249 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

And no longer shall each one teach his neighbor and each his brother, saying, ‘Know the Lord ,’ for they shall all know me, from the least of them to the greatest, declares the Lord . For I will forgive their iniquity, and I will remember their sin no more.”

Acts 17:30 ESV / 245 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

The times of ignorance God overlooked, but now he commands all people everywhere to repent,

Colossians 1:14 ESV / 243 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

In whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.

Romans 10:9 ESV / 239 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Because, if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.

Matthew 5:44 ESV / 233 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you,

Romans 12:20 ESV / 228 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

To the contrary, “if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals on his head.”

Luke 23:33-34 ESV / 224 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

And when they came to the place that is called The Skull, there they crucified him, and the criminals, one on his right and one on his left. And Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” And they cast lots to divide his garments.

Jeremiah 3:12 ESV / 221 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Go, and proclaim these words toward the north, and say, “‘Return, faithless Israel, declares the Lord . I will not look on you in anger, for I am merciful, declares the Lord ; I will not be angry forever.

John 3:16-17 ESV / 218 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him.

Matthew 6:12-15 ESV / 218 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.

Psalm 32:1-2 ESV / 213 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

A Maskil of David. Blessed is the one whose transgression is forgiven, whose sin is covered. Blessed is the man against whom the Lord counts no iniquity, and in whose spirit there is no deceit.

1 John 1:8 ESV / 211 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.

Matthew 18:21 ESV / 206 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?”

John 8:7 ESV / 203 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

And as they continued to ask him, he stood up and said to them, “Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her.”

Luke 24:47 ESV / 203 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

And that repentance for the forgiveness of sins should be proclaimed in his name to all nations, beginning from Jerusalem.

Acts 4:12 ESV / 197 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

And there is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given among men by which we must be saved.”

Acts 7:59-60 ESV / 196 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

And as they were stoning Stephen, he called out, “Lord Jesus, receive my spirit.” And falling to his knees he cried out with a loud voice, “Lord, do not hold this sin against them.” And when he had said this, he fell asleep.

Colossians 3:12-13 ESV / 194 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.

1 John 3:2 ESV / 192 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Beloved, we are God's children now, and what we will be has not yet appeared; but we know that when he appears we shall be like him, because we shall see him as he is.

Luke 11:4 ESV / 190 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

And forgive us our sins, for we ourselves forgive everyone who is indebted to us. And lead us not into temptation.”

Jeremiah 17:9 ESV / 190 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?

Romans 5:8 ESV / 189 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

Psalm 103:10-14 ESV / 184 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us. As a father shows compassion to his children, so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear him. For he knows our frame; he remembers that we are dust.

2 Corinthians 2:5-8 ESV / 183 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Now if anyone has caused pain, he has caused it not to me, but in some measure—not to put it too severely—to all of you. For such a one, this punishment by the majority is enough, so you should rather turn to forgive and comfort him, or he may be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow. So I beg you to reaffirm your love for him.

Matthew 18:23-35 ESV / 182 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

“Therefore the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his servants. When he began to settle, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents. And since he could not pay, his master ordered him to be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had, and payment to be made. So the servant fell on his knees, imploring him, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you everything.’ And out of pity for him, the master of that servant released him and forgave him the debt. ...

Revelation 1:1 ESV / 167 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

The revelation of Jesus Christ, which God gave him to show to his servants the things that must soon take place. He made it known by sending his angel to his servant John,

Isaiah 53:5 ESV / 166 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

But he was pierced for our transgressions; he was crushed for our iniquities; upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace, and with his wounds we are healed.

Psalm 19:12 ESV / 165 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Who can discern his errors? Declare me innocent from hidden faults.

Galatians 6:1 ESV / 157 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted.

John 20:22-23 ESV / 157 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

And when he had said this, he breathed on them and said to them, “Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you withhold forgiveness from any, it is withheld.”

Matthew 18:35 ESV / 154 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart.”

Colossians 2:13 ESV / 149 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

And you, who were dead in your trespasses and the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made alive together with him, having forgiven us all our trespasses,

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 ESV / 149 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Acts 13:38 ESV / 148 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Let it be known to you therefore, brothers, that through this man forgiveness of sins is proclaimed to you,

James 5:15 ESV / 146 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

And the prayer of faith will save the one who is sick, and the Lord will raise him up. And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven.

Numbers 14:19-21 ESV / 144 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Please pardon the iniquity of this people, according to the greatness of your steadfast love, just as you have forgiven this people, from Egypt until now.” Then the Lord said, “I have pardoned, according to your word. But truly, as I live, and as all the earth shall be filled with the glory of the Lord ,

Luke 7:47-48 ESV / 132 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Therefore I tell you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven—for she loved much. But he who is forgiven little, loves little.” And he said to her, “Your sins are forgiven.”

Hebrews 4:16 ESV / 127 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.

Nehemiah 9:31 ESV / 126 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Nevertheless, in your great mercies you did not make an end of them or forsake them, for you are a gracious and merciful God.

Psalm 79:9 ESV / 119 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Help us, O God of our salvation, for the glory of your name; deliver us, and atone for our sins, for your name's sake!

Micah 7:19 ESV / 114 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

He will again have compassion on us; he will tread our iniquities underfoot. You will cast all our sins into the depths of the sea.

Luke 17:4 ESV / 110 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

And if he sins against you seven times in the day, and turns to you seven times, saying, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive him.”

Ephesians 4:31 ESV / 104 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice.

1 Corinthians 10:13 ESV / 101 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful

No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.

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Guest Essay

The View Within Israel Turns Bleak

By Megan K. Stack

Ms. Stack is a contributing Opinion writer who has reported from the Middle East.

It was the pictures of Palestinians swimming and sunning at a Gaza beach that rubbed Yehuda Shlezinger, an Israeli journalist, the wrong way. Stylish in round red glasses and a faint scruff of beard, Mr. Shlezinger unloaded his revulsion at the “disturbing” pictures while appearing on Israel’s Channel 12.

“These people there deserve death, a hard death, an agonizing death, and instead we see them enjoying on the beach and having fun,” complained Mr. Shlezinger, the religious affairs correspondent for the widely circulated right-wing Israel Hayom newspaper. “We should have seen a lot more revenge there,” Mr. Shlezinger unrepentantly added. “A lot more rivers of Gazans’ blood.”

It would be nice to think that Mr. Shlezinger is a fringe figure or that Israelis would be shocked by his bloody fantasies. But he’s not, and many wouldn’t be.

Israel has hardened, and the signs of it are in plain view. Dehumanizing language and promises of annihilation from military and political leaders. Polls that found wide support for the policies that have wreaked devastation and starvation in Gaza. Selfies of Israeli soldiers preening proudly in bomb-crushed Palestinian neighborhoods. A crackdown on even mild forms of dissent among Israelis.

The Israeli left — the factions that criticize the occupation of Palestinian lands and favor negotiations and peace instead — is now a withered stump of a once-vigorous movement. In recent years, the attitudes of many Israelis toward the “Palestinian problem” have ranged largely from detached fatigue to the hard-line belief that driving Palestinians off their land and into submission is God’s work.

This bleak ideological landscape emerged slowly and then, on Oct. 7, all at once.

The massacre and kidnappings of that day, predictably, brought a public thirst for revenge. But in truth, by the time Hamas killers rampaged through the kibbutzim — in a bitter twist, home to some of the holdout peaceniks — many Israelis had long since come to regard Palestinians as a threat best locked away. America’s romantic mythology and wishful thinking about Israel encourage a tendency to see Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu as the main cause of the ruthlessness in Gaza, where Israel has killed more than 35,000 people. The unpopular, scandal-ridden premier makes a convincing ogre in an oversimplified story.

But Israel’s slaughter in Gaza, the creeping famine, the wholesale destruction of neighborhoods — this, polling suggests, is the war the Israeli public wanted. A January survey found that 94 percent of Jewish Israelis said the force being used against Gaza was appropriate or even insufficient. In February, a poll found that most Jewish Israelis opposed food and medicine getting into Gaza. It was not Mr. Netanyahu alone but also his war cabinet members (including Benny Gantz, often invoked as the moderate alternative to Mr. Netanyahu) who unanimously rejected a Hamas deal to free Israeli hostages and, instead, began an assault on the city of Rafah, overflowing with displaced civilians.

“It’s so much easier to put everything on Netanyahu, because then you feel so good about yourself and Netanyahu is the darkness,” said Gideon Levy, an Israeli journalist who has documented Israel’s military occupation for decades. “But the darkness is everywhere.”

Like most political evolutions, the toughening of Israel is partly explained by generational change — Israeli children whose earliest memories are woven through with suicide bombings have now matured into adulthood. The rightward creep could be long-lasting because of demographics, with modern Orthodox and ultra-Orthodox Jews (who disproportionately vote with the right) consistently having more babies than their secular compatriots.

Most crucially, many Israelis emerged from the second intifada with a jaundiced view of negotiations and, more broadly, Palestinians, who were derided as unable to make peace. This logic conveniently erased Israel’s own role in sabotaging the peace process through land seizures and settlement expansion. But something broader had taken hold — a quality that Israelis described to me as a numb, disassociated denial around the entire topic of Palestinians.

“The issues of settlements or relations with Palestinians were off the table for years,” Tamar Hermann told me. “The status quo was OK for Israelis.”

Ms. Hermann, a senior research fellow at the Israel Democracy Institute, is one of the country’s most respected experts on Israeli public opinion. In recent years, she said, Palestinians hardly caught the attention of Israeli Jews. She and her colleagues periodically made lists of issues and asked respondents to rank them in order of importance. It didn’t matter how many choices the pollsters presented, she said — resolving the Israeli-Palestinian conflict came in last in almost all measurements.

“It was totally ignored,” she said.

The psychological barrier between Israelis and Palestinians was hardened when Israel built the snaking West Bank barrier, which helped to forestall attacks on Israelis toward the end of the second intifada — the five-year Palestinian uprising that erupted in 2000, killing about 1,000 Israelis and roughly three times as many Palestinians. The wall helped keep West Bank suicide bombers from penetrating Israel and piled extra misery on ever-more-constrained Palestinian civilians, many of whom refer to it as the apartheid wall.

Many Israelis, Ms. Hermann told me, are at a loss when asked to identify the border where Israel ends and the West Bank begins. Her research from 2016 found that only a small percentage of Israelis knew for sure that the Green Line was the border delineated by the 1949 Armistice. The question of whether this border should even be depicted on Israeli school maps has been a heated topic of debate within Israel; with a rueful laugh, Ms. Hermann described many of the classroom maps as “from the river to the sea.”

Such ignorance is a luxury exclusive to Israelis. Palestinians make it their business to know exactly where the border between Israel and the West Bank lies, which checkpoints are open on a given day, which roads they may and may not use. These are not abstract ideas; they dictate the daily movements of Palestinians, and confusing them could be fatal.

Israel’s uneasy detachment turned to rage on Oct. 7.

A handful of songs with lyrics calling for the annihilation of a dehumanized enemy have been circulated in Israel these past months, including “Launch,” a hip-hop glorification of the military promising “from kisses to guns, until Gaza is erased” and suggesting that the West Bank city of Jenin is under the “plague of the firstborn,” a reference to the biblical story in which God smites the eldest sons of Egypt. The smash hit “ Harbu Darbu ,” addressed to “you sons of Amalek,” promises “another X on the rifle, ’cause every dog will get what’s coming to him.”

“There is no forgiveness for swarms of rats,” another song goes . “They will die in their rat holes.”

Israeli shops hawk trendy products like a bumper sticker that reads, “Finish them,” and a pendant cut into the shape of Israel, with East Jerusalem, the West Bank and Gaza seamlessly attached.

Israeli protesters have repeatedly taken to the streets in anguish over the hostages held in Gaza and rage at Mr. Netanyahu (who faced intense domestic opposition long before Oct. 7) for failing to save them. But the demonstrations should not be conflated with international calls to protect civilians in Gaza. Many Israelis want a cease-fire to free the hostages, followed by the ouster of Mr. Netanyahu — but the protests do not reflect a groundswell of sympathy for Palestinians or a popular desire to rethink the status quo ante of occupation and long-silenced peace talks.

If anything, with the world’s attention fixed on Gaza, Israel’s far-right government has intensified the domination of Palestinians. The single largest Israeli land grab in more than 30 years happened in March , when Finance Minister Bezalel Smotrich announced the state seizure of 10 square kilometers of the West Bank. The land takeovers are accompanied by a bloody campaign of terror , with an ever-less-distinguishable mix of soldiers and settlers killing at least 460 Palestinians in the West Bank since Oct. 7, the Palestinian health ministry says.

Meanwhile, inside Israel, the police have handed out guns to civilians and set up de facto militias in the name of self-defense. But questions about whom these newly armed groups are meant to defend, and from whom, have created a creeping unease.

The weapons have gone not only to West Bank settlements or towns adjacent to Palestinian territories and Lebanon but also to communities set deep in Israel’s interior, particularly places that are home to a mix of Arab and Jewish residents . An analysis published in January by the newspaper Haaretz found that while the national security ministry wouldn’t disclose which communities got gun licenses or the criteria used to decide, Arab communities — even those on Israel’s frontier — did not seem to be eligible.

The guns sent a chill through Palestinian citizens of Israel, who have often been invoked in defense of the state. Look, Israel’s advocates often say, Arabs live more freely in Israel than anywhere else in the Middle East.

Hassan Jabareen, a prominent Palestinian lawyer who founded Adalah, Israel’s main legal center for Arab rights, told me that many Arab citizens of Israel — who constitute one-fifth of the population — live in fear.

Israel’s attacks on Gaza have in the past provoked community protests, riots and clashes among Arabs and Jews in Israel. After Oct. 7, though, the message was clear: Stay quiet.

“The police left no doubt that we were enemies of the state,” Mr. Jabareen said, “when they started arming the Jewish citizens of Israel and called Jewish citizens to come to the station and take your arms to defend yourself from your Palestinian neighbor.”

Diana Buttu, a Palestinian lawyer who lives with her family in the Israeli city of Haifa, told me that these past months have been thick with unease. She has long imagined herself as a living holdover from the once-thriving Arab population that was largely displaced from what is now Israel. A “remnant,” she calls herself, who for years moved through Israel feeling invisible.

Now the sense of invisibility has melted. Both Ms. Buttu and Mr. Jabareen said that the current atmosphere in Israel had drawn closer and sharpened in their minds the mass displacement known in Arabic as the nakba, or catastrophe, as if history might yet loop back. Mr. Netanyahu evoked the same era when he referred to Israel’s current onslaught as “Israel’s second war of independence.”

“They didn’t see us,” Ms. Buttu said. “We were the ghosts; we were just there. And now it’s like, ‘Wow, they’re here.’ There is an interest in trying to get rid of Palestinians. We’re on the rhetorical front lines.”

Long before this current storm of violence, Mr. Netanyahu’s far-right government had worked to strengthen Jewish supremacy. The 2018 “nation-state law” codified the right to national self-determination as “unique to the Jewish people,” removed Arabic as an official language and established “Jewish settlement as a national value” that the government must support. Palestinian members of the Knesset famously shredded copies of the bill in Parliament and yelled, “Apartheid,” but it passed all the same.

In 2022, Israel reauthorized its controversial family unification law, largely barring Palestinians who marry Israeli citizens from receiving legal status — or living with their spouses in Israel — if they are from the West Bank or Gaza. The law also applies to people from the “enemy states” of Lebanon, Syria and Iraq (homes to Palestinian refugee communities), as well as Iran.

With legal disadvantages and social pressures mounting, Palestinian citizens of Israel have started to look abroad for support. Mr. Jabareen told me that his organization is preparing an application to the United Nations to request international legal protections for Palestinians inside Israel. In March a Palestinian citizen of Israel was granted asylum in Britain after arguing that returning would very likely expose him to persecution because of his political views and activism for Palestinian rights and Israel’s “apartheid system of racial control of its Jewish citizens over its Palestinian citizens.”

Another stark sign of Israel’s hardening is the hundreds of Israelis — mostly Arabs, but some Jews, too — who have been arrested, fired or otherwise punished for statements or actions regarded as endangering national security or undermining Israel’s war efforts. Even a social media post expressing concern for Palestinians in Gaza is enough to draw police scrutiny.

Nadera Shalhoub-Kevorkian, a scholar who lectures at Hebrew University of Jerusalem and Queen Mary University of London, said on a podcast that Zionism should be abolished, that Israel may be lying about the extent of sexual assault that took place on Oct. 7 and that Israelis were “criminals” who “cannot kill and not be afraid, so they better be afraid.” Israeli police responded in April by jailing Ms. Shalhoub-Kevorkian overnight and asking a judge to keep her locked up while they investigated her on suspicion of incitement. The judge decided to release her but acknowledged that she “may have crossed the line from free expression to incitement.”

For nearly two decades — starting with the quieting of the second intifada and ending calamitously on Oct. 7 — Israel was remarkably successful at insulating itself from the violence of the occupation. Rockets fired from Gaza periodically rained down on Israeli cities, but since 2011 , Israel’s Iron Dome defense system has intercepted most of them. The mathematics of death heavily favored Israel: From 2008 until Oct. 7, more than 6,000 Palestinians were killed in what the United Nations calls “the context of occupation and conflict”; during that time, more than 300 Israelis were killed.

Human rights organizations — including Israeli groups — wrote elaborate reports explaining why Israel is an apartheid state. That was embarrassing for Israel, but nothing really came of it. The economy flourished. Once-hostile Arab states showed themselves willing to sign accords with Israel after just a little performative pestering about the Palestinians.

Those years gave Israelis a taste of what may be the Jewish state’s most elusive dream — a world in which there simply did not exist a Palestinian problem.

Daniel Levy, a former Israeli negotiator who is now president of the U.S./Middle East Project think tank, describes “the level of hubris and arrogance that built up over the years.” Those who warned of the immorality or strategic folly of occupying Palestinian territories “were dismissed,” he said, “like, ‘Just get over it.’”

If U.S. officials understand the state of Israeli politics, it doesn’t show. Biden administration officials keep talking about a Palestinian state. But the land earmarked for a state has been steadily covered in illegal Israeli settlements, and Israel itself has seldom stood so unabashedly opposed to Palestinian sovereignty.

There’s a reason Mr. Netanyahu keeps reminding everyone that he’s spent his career undermining Palestinian statehood: It’s a selling point. Mr. Gantz, who is more popular than Mr. Netanyahu and is often mentioned as a likely successor, is a centrist by Israeli standards — but he, too, has pushed back against international calls for a Palestinian state.

Daniel Levy describes the current divide among major Israeli politicians this way: Some believe in “managing the apartheid in a way that gives Palestinians more freedom — that’s [Yair] Lapid and maybe Gantz on some days,” while hard-liners like Mr. Smotrich and Security Minister Itamar Ben Gvir “are really about getting rid of the Palestinians. Eradication. Displacement.”

The carnage and cruelty suffered by Israelis on Oct. 7 should have driven home the futility of sealing themselves off from Palestinians while subjecting them to daily humiliations and violence. As long as Palestinians are trapped under violent military occupation, deprived of basic rights and told that they must accept their lot as inherently lower beings, Israelis will live under the threat of uprisings, reprisals and terrorism. There is no wall thick enough to suppress forever a people who have nothing to lose.

Israelis did not, by and large, take that lesson. Now apathy has been replaced by vengeance.

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Megan K. Stack is a contributing Opinion writer and author. She has been a correspondent in China, Russia, Egypt, Israel, Afghanistan and the U.S.-Mexico border area. Her first book, a narrative account of the post-Sept. 11 wars, was a finalist for the National Book Award in nonfiction. @ Megankstack