essay about a person's characteristics

Personal Characteristics Essay: Top Examples and Tips for Successful Writing

Looking to write a compelling personal characteristics essay? Our article offers top examples and tips for successful writing.

Posted August 18, 2023

Table of Contents

When it comes to writing a personal characteristics essay, there are several important factors to consider to ensure that your essay stands out from the rest. This type of essay requires you to talk about your personal traits and characteristics and how they have shaped your life experiences and decisions. Writing a personal characteristics essay can be daunting, but with the right strategies and techniques, you can craft an impressive essay that leaves a lasting impression.

Understanding the Purpose of a Personal Characteristics Essay

Before diving into the writing process, it's essential to understand the purpose of a personal characteristics essay. The purpose of this type of essay is to showcase your unique qualities and characteristics, which makes you stand out from the rest. It's an opportunity for the reader to gain insight into your personality and the way you think. Your essay should not only provide a description of your traits but also demonstrate how they influence your actions and decisions.

Additionally, a personal characteristics essay can also serve as a tool for self-reflection and personal growth. Through the process of writing about your traits and how they have impacted your life, you may gain a deeper understanding of yourself and your values. This type of essay can also help you identify areas for improvement and set goals for personal development.

How to Choose a Topic for Your Personal Characteristics Essay

Choosing the right topic for your personal characteristics essay is crucial. You want to select a topic that not only reflects your personality but also allows you to showcase your writing skills. Start by brainstorming a list of traits and characteristics that define you. From there, select a topic that highlights one or two of these traits. Think about a situation that showcases these traits and how you overcame a challenge or learned a valuable lesson.

Another important factor to consider when choosing a topic for your personal characteristics essay is your audience. Think about who will be reading your essay and what they might be interested in learning about you. Consider selecting a topic that is relatable and relevant to your audience, while still highlighting your unique qualities.

It's also important to remember that your personal characteristics essay should not just be a list of traits or accomplishments. Instead, focus on telling a story that illustrates your personality and how it has shaped your experiences and perspectives. Choose a topic that allows you to delve deeper into your personal journey and share insights that will resonate with your readers.

Brainstorming Techniques for Your Personal Characteristics Essay

Brainstorming is an essential step in the writing process. It allows you to generate ideas and make connections between them. Try using mind maps or free-writing to get your ideas down on paper. You might also consider asking friends or family members what they think your most prominent traits are to get an outside perspective.

Another effective technique for brainstorming your personal characteristics essay is to reflect on your past experiences and how they have shaped you. Think about challenges you have faced and how you overcame them, or moments of success and how they have contributed to your personal growth. These experiences can provide valuable insight into your character and help you identify key traits to highlight in your essay.

The Importance of Organizing Your Thoughts and Ideas

Once you've generated your ideas, it's time to organize them. Start by creating an outline that includes the main points you want to make in your essay. Your outline should also include the introduction, body, and conclusion sections of your essay. Organizing your thoughts and ideas will help you stay on track and ensure that you cover all the necessary points in your essay.

Moreover, organizing your thoughts and ideas can also help you identify any gaps in your argument or areas where you need to do more research. By creating an outline, you can see where you need to add more information or examples to support your points. This can help you create a more well-rounded and convincing essay.

Additionally, organizing your thoughts and ideas can also help you save time in the long run. When you have a clear outline to follow, you can write your essay more efficiently and effectively. You won't waste time trying to figure out what to write next or how to structure your essay. Instead, you can focus on writing high-quality content that supports your thesis statement and engages your readers.

Tips for Writing a Strong Introduction to Your Essay

The introduction to your essay is crucial as it sets the tone for the rest of your essay. Your introduction should grab the reader's attention and entice them to keep reading. Consider starting with a hook, such as a quote, an anecdote, or a question. Your introduction should also include your thesis statement, which outlines the main point of your essay.

In addition to a hook and thesis statement, your introduction should also provide some background information on the topic you are writing about. This can help to contextualize your essay and give the reader a better understanding of the subject matter. However, be careful not to include too much information in your introduction, as it can become overwhelming and detract from the main point of your essay.

The Art of Developing a Compelling Thesis Statement

Your thesis statement should be concise and clear. It should provide a roadmap for the rest of your essay. Think about the main point you want to make and how you plan on supporting it throughout your essay. Make sure your thesis statement is arguable and specific.

Supporting Your Claims with Relevant Examples and Evidence

To make your essay more compelling, you should back up your claims and arguments with relevant examples and evidence. This will help your reader understand the extent of your personal qualities and how they have impacted your life experiences. Make sure to include specific examples from your life that illustrate the qualities you're discussing in your essay.

One effective way to provide evidence for your claims is to use statistics or data that support your argument. For example, if you're writing an essay about the benefits of exercise, you could include statistics about the number of people who have improved their health through regular exercise. This will add credibility to your argument and make it more convincing.

Another way to support your claims is to use expert opinions or quotes from reputable sources. This can help to strengthen your argument and show that you have done your research on the topic. Be sure to properly cite any sources you use in your essay.

The Power of Descriptive Writing: Painting a Vivid Picture with Words

Descriptive writing is a powerful tool that can be used to paint a vivid picture of your experiences and personality in your essay. Use sensory details to help your reader visualize your experiences. Consider incorporating metaphors or similes to make your writing more interesting and engaging.

Adding Depth and Complexity to Your Essay through Analysis and Reflection

Analysis and reflection are essential elements of an outstanding personal characteristics essay. Once you have described your traits and experiences, you should analyze how they have contributed to your personal growth and development. Reflection is also important as it allows you to consider how you might apply your characteristics to future situations.

The Benefits of Peer Review and Collaboration in Essay Writing

Collaborating with others can be immensely helpful in refining your essay. You might consider having a friend or family member review your essay and provide feedback. Peer review can help you identify areas where your essay needs improvement and provide suggestions for how to improve it.

Strategies for Effective Editing and Proofreading

Editing and proofreading are crucial steps in the writing process. Once you have completed your essay, take a break and come back to it with fresh eyes. Look for errors in grammar, punctuation, and spelling. Make sure to also check that your essay flows logically and that your arguments are well-supported.

Addressing Common Pitfalls in Personal Characteristics Essays

One common pitfall in personal characteristics essays is focusing too much on describing your traits instead of analyzing how they have impacted your life experiences. Another common pitfall is using cliches or generic language instead of making your essay unique and interesting. Be sure to avoid these pitfalls to ensure your essay stands out.

Using Keywords and Meta Tags to Optimize Your Essay for Search Engines

If you plan on publishing your essay online, you might consider optimizing it for search engines such as Google. This involves using keywords and meta tags in your essay that will help it appear higher in search results. Be sure to research the most popular keywords related to your topic and include them strategically in your essay.

Crafting an Impressive Conclusion that Leaves a Lasting Impression

Finally, your conclusion should leave a lasting impression on the reader. Summarize your main points and reiterate your thesis statement. Think about what you want your reader to take away from your essay. Consider ending with a call to action or a memorable quote.

Writing a personal characteristics essay can be a challenging task, but with the right strategies and techniques, you can craft an impressive essay that showcases your unique qualities and characteristics. By following the tips outlined above, you'll be well on your way to writing a successful personal characteristics essay that leaves a lasting impression.

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Your chance of acceptance, your chancing factors, extracurriculars, personal characteristics essay.

Hi everyone! I'm working on a personal characteristics essay for a college application and wondering if you could guide me on what to include. What kind of qualities and experiences would be most effective to write about? Thanks in advance!

Hello! Writing a personal characteristics essay is a great opportunity to showcase the unique qualities and experiences that make you stand out as an applicant. Here are a few tips to help you highlight these aspects effectively:

1. Self-awareness and self-reflection: Colleges appreciate students who can look inward and are aware of their strengths, weaknesses, and growth opportunities. Reflect on how you've grown over time, what challenges you've faced, and how you've overcome them. This demonstrates maturity and a willingness to learn from your experiences.

2. Genuine passion: Choose qualities that genuinely resonate with you rather than those you think the admissions officers want to hear. Be authentic about what excites you and how it has shaped your goals or aspirations. This will make your essay more engaging and relatable.

3. Show, don't tell: Instead of simply stating your qualities, use anecdotes or experiences to illustrate them. You could describe a specific project, extracurricular activity, or event where you demonstrated leadership, creativity, resilience, or another characteristic. This makes your essay more memorable and helps the reader better understand your personality.

4. Be specific: Avoid generic statements like "I'm a hard worker" or "I'm a good leader." Instead, focus on specific examples that showcase these qualities. For instance, you could discuss a time when you managed a team project under tight deadlines or when you took the initiative to start a new club at school.

5. Highlight your impact: Discuss the impact your personal characteristics have had on others, such as your friends, family, or community. This could include volunteer work, tutoring others, or participating in group activities where your qualities positively influenced the outcome.

6. Balance: While it's important to showcase your strengths, also recognize areas where you could improve. This shows humility and a commitment to personal growth, further enhancing your self-awareness.

7. Keep it concise and well-organized: Focus on a few key characteristics and experiences, rather than trying to cover too much ground. Make sure your essay has a clear structure, with an introduction, body paragraphs for each quality or experience, and a conclusion that ties everything together.

In summary, when writing a personal characteristics essay, focus on being self-aware, genuine, specific, and impactful. Use anecdotes and experiences to illustrate your qualities, while remaining concise and well-organized. Good luck with your essay!

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Personality & Character Traits: The Good, the Bad, the Ugly

The world we live in is different from what it was 10, five, or even one year ago. Thanks to social media, easy-to-use communication tools, and globalization, the pool of possibilities and available information are constantly expanding.

Without a clear idea of one’s own preferences, making the right choice can be extremely difficult and confusing. Everyone’s personality is unique, and knowing what makes us who we are, can lead to more life satisfaction, better life choices, and overall success in both personal and professional spheres.

Before you continue, we thought you might like to download our three Strengths Exercises for free . These detailed, science-based exercises will help you or your clients realize your unique potential and create a life that feels energized and authentic.

This Article Contains:

Character and personality traits defined, character trait theories.

• The Big Five or OCEAN Model

The PEN Model

Examples of positive and negative characteristics, character traits worksheets for kids and adults (pdfs), the character traits anchor chart and other graphic organizers, a take-home message.

While character and personality are both used to describe someone’s behaviors, the two examine different aspects of that individual. One’s personality is more visible, while one’s  character is revealed over time, through varying situations.

In more concrete terms:

“Personality is easy to read, and we’re all experts at it. We judge people [as] funny, extroverted, energetic, optimistic , confident—as well as overly serious, lazy, negative, and shy—if not upon first meeting them, then shortly thereafter. And though we may need more than one interaction to confirm the presence of these sorts of traits, by the time we decide they are, in fact, present, we’ve usually amassed enough data to justify our conclusions. “Character, on the other hand, takes far longer to puzzle out. It includes traits that reveal themselves only in specific—and often uncommon—circumstances, traits like honesty, virtue, and kindliness .” Lickerman, 2011

While personality is easier to spot, it’s largely static and slow to evolve. Character, on the other hand, takes longer to discern but is easier to change. That’s because character is shaped by beliefs, and with enough effort and motivation, changing one’s perspective and view of the world can lead to a shift in one’s character.

The malleability of character makes sense when you look at human evolution. In order for our ancestors to survive, they had to adapt to new environments and change with the times—and this remains true in the modern era.

If an individual deems a change in their surroundings to be significant, then their beliefs will transform to accommodate the change.

For instance, an individual who might have a shy personality can learn to switch their attitude toward public speaking when stepping into the role of a teacher. The new social and external demands lead to an internal shift that changes their demeanor.

In this way, even if an individual’s inborn preference is to shy away from the public, the beliefs and values that shape their behavior can evolve to reflect the values of their immediate groups and communities. Such awareness and adaptability help with survival (Kurtus, 2011).

The bottom line is, despite the significance of our inborn personality traits, we can overcome them as required by personal or cultural demands.

TED Talk: Who Are You, Really? The Puzzle of Personality by Brian Little

In this talk, personality expert Brian Little explains the phenomenon of overcoming one’s inborn traits and explores how our character is modified by the core projects we work on.

Tools for identifying personality traits have never been more plentiful. “ In the U.S. alone, there are about 2,500 personality tests ” to choose from (Ash, 2012). Yet, quantity does not imply quality.

Due to immense variations in personality, it is difficult to divide people neatly into different classifications. Instead, assessing individuals by the most common personality traits can empower us to deduce a person’s behavior by looking at the average of their choices (Pappas, 2017).

Below are two of the most widely used personality tools that can identify your personality traits. Some pros and cons of each are also highlighted.

A quick note is that we have reviewed only scale-based personality assessments, rather than profile-based assessments. The difference is that scale-based assessments treat personality traits as existing on a continuum, whereas profile-based assessments classify individuals according to binary categories (e.g., an introvert or an extrovert).

Common profile-based assessments that you may be familiar with include the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) and the Enneagram. While these tools can be a fun way to gain some self-insight, they are often critiqued by scientists (Grant, 2013).

A key criticism is that the results of profile-based assessments pigeonhole individuals into particular categories (e.g., labeling someone as an extrovert or introvert; a thinker or a feeler), but few things in life are so black and white. In reality, it is believed that our personality traits exist on scales with opposite poles, and all of us will fall somewhere between either end of that continuum (e.g., the introversion-extroversion scale).

Put differently, “ if the MBTI measured height, you would be classified as either tall or short, even though the majority of people are within a band of medium height ” (Krznaric, 2013). Hence, we’ve limited this review to only scale-based assessments, which are more scientifically backed.

The Big Five, or OCEAN Model

Perhaps the most comprehensive and science-backed, personality test available is the Big Five .

Unlike the popular (but disputed) Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI), this assessment does not divide people into personality profiles but rather analyzes an individual based on the most common traits found within the global community. The traits are easy to remember, as they spell out the acronym OCEAN.

OCEAN stands for:

• Openness : This describes an individual’s love for novelty experiences. Those with high scores tend to be more creative . Individuals with lower scores tend to be more conservative and prefer routines.
• Conscientiousness : This shows someone’s tendency for organization. Those with high scores are seen as motivated, disciplined, and trustworthy. Lower scores indicate someone less responsible and more likely to get distracted.
• Extroversion : This factor indicates how cheerful and communicative a person can be. If someone scores highly in extroversion, they tend to be social and likely to accomplish their goals . Low scores indicate someone who is introverted and more submissive to authority.
• Agreeableness : This trait describes how someone interacts with those around them. High scores indicate that someone is warm and friendly. Those who tend to be more egocentric and suspicious (or even shy) tend to score lower.
• Neuroticism : Emotional stability can reveal a lot about the likelihood of someone developing moodiness and anxiety. High scores on neuroticism indicate someone who is less-assured, and low scores describe a person who is calm and confident (Westerhoff, 2008).

These categories serve as an umbrella that influences other personality areas, such as:

• Openness: imagination, feelings, actions, ideas, values, adventurousness, artistic interests, etc.
• Conscientiousness: order, self-discipline, competence, achievement striving, etc.
• Extroversion: warmth, friendliness, assertiveness, activity level, positive emotions, etc.
• Agreeableness: trust, compliance, modesty, altruism, sympathy, cooperation, etc.
• Neuroticism : hostility, depression, impulsiveness, anger, vulnerability, self-consciousness, etc. (ETS, 2012)

Take the test

Those wishing to know their OCEAN results can take any of the following quizzes:

• The Big Five Personality Test
• (Another) Big Five Personality Test
• Personality Test at 123test.com
• Ten Item Personality Measure (available in different languages)

Again, we’ll explore the benefits and drawbacks of the OCEAN model.

Unlike the MBTI, which tries to categorize people into one of 16 personality profiles, the Big Five understands that individuals possess certain traits, which need to be measured on a continuum. It is rare to be only on one or the other side of the spectrum.

For instance, saying that extroverts absorb energy when interacting with others and that introverts expend energy when interacting with the outside world is false, as both get energy from their interpersonal relations (Grant, 2015).

“The Big Five structure captures, at a broad level of abstraction, the commonalities among most of the existing systems of personality description, and provides an integrative descriptive model for personality research” (John & Srivastava, 1999).

Thanks to its results that provide scales of different traits rather than profiling the individual, this personality assessment tool can provide a degree of flexibility and versatility, which has enabled researchers to use the assessment to examine the influence of these traits on different areas of life, like  mental health , finances, and relationships.

And for the most part, these traits have been shown to be relatively stable. Specifically, in a nine-year study, there was “moderate to high [stability], ranging from 0.73 to 0.97 in men and from 0.65 to 0.95 in women. The highest gender-equal stability was found for openness to experience and the lowest for conscientiousness” (Rantanen, Metsäpelto, Feldt, Pulkkinen, & Kokko, 2007).

More specifically, men showed more stability in traits like neuroticism and extroversion, while women showed more stability in traits like openness to experience, agreeableness, and conscientiousness.

Despite its stability and usefulness, the tool does have its flaws.

Here are a few:

1. Too big to fail

As mentioned earlier, the beauty of this tool is its big-picture view of personality traits, but it’s also a limitation. A good analogy to explain this is the categorization of living organisms into plants or animals. While it’s helpful for certain distinctions, it is not helpful for “value predicting specific behaviors of a particular individual” (John, Naumann, & Soto, 2008).

2. Not so universal

While there has been evidence-based research to support the validity of the tool in more than 50 countries, flaws in translation and applicability to non-English-speaking cultures can be found. This results in skewed scores, as was demonstrated by research conducted with a small South American tribe (Dingfelder, 2013).

Developed by Hans and Sybil Eysenck in 1975, this model looks at the biological factors that trigger or influence personality. The three focal traits examined by this model are psychoticism, extroversion, and neuroticism (Waude, 2017).

The origins of this model date back to the 1960s, but it didn’t originally measure psychoticism (which relates to measures of  compassion , morality, as well as creativity). The older model used the Eysenck Personality Inventory to gather and analyze results.

With the addition of psychoticism, the questions were updated and the tool for gathering these results was renamed the Eysenck Personality Questionnaire.

Each of the trait categories explores the following human behaviors:

• Psychoticism : People who score high in this measure often participate in hostile, reckless, inconsiderate, nonconforming, tough-minded, and impulsive behaviors. Higher levels of testosterone are associated with higher scores in this area.
• Extroversion : Individuals with a high level of extroversion are more outgoing and talkative, and they desire external stimuli. Higher stimulation usually occurs as a result of increased cortical arousal and can be measured through skin conductance, brain waves, or sweating.
• Neuroticism : Those with a high level of neuroticism are more prone to depression and anxiety. The trait is activated by the sympathetic nervous system, which is also responsible for the fight-or-flight response. This can be measured through heart rate, blood pressure, cold hands, sweating, and muscular tension.

Based on these measures, there are four possible quadrants that individuals can fall into:

• Stable extroverts: recognized by their talkative, easygoing, lively, and carefree natures and their  leadership qualities
• Unstable extroverts: seen as touchy, restless, impulsive, and irresponsible
• Stable introverts: recognized by their calm, reliable, peaceful, thoughtful, and passive traits
• Unstable introverts: seen as reserved, pessimistic, rigid, anxious, and moody

Those interested in taking the Eysenck Personality Questionnaire can do so here .

Once more, we’ll explore the pros and cons of this personality model.

The model looks at both descriptive and causal effects. It examines three specific dimensions, making it easy to understand. And it has demonstrated test–retest reliability.

In fact, when specifically examining the pattern of moods, this assessment is able to predict certain outcomes. For instance, the questionnaire can predict significant associations with anxiety, according to a 2012 study.

“Focusing on the item of ‘Does your mood often go up and down?’ showed a statistically significant association with melancholia and anxiety for patients with a positive score on this item.” Bech, Lunde, & Moller, 2012

Through twin studies, researchers have also found that some of the personality traits measured with the PEN model “exhibit significant genetic variance” (Heath, Jardine, Eaves & Martin, 1988). For traits related to extroversion, researchers “found both additive gene action and dominance,” while “neuroticism items appeared to show purely additive genetic inheritance” (Heath, Jardine, Eaves & Martin, 1988).

Some factors, though, were shown to be influenced by the subjects’ environments, including the psychoticism scale, though for psychoticism the “environmental effects appeared to be largely restricted to males” (Heath, Jardine, Eaves & Martin, 1988).

Like most personality trait assessments, the PEN model is unable to predict future behaviors of individuals, even using the model allows for a better understanding of individuals’ personalities.

And there are certain limits to the model. In a study of both imprisoned and non-imprisoned people, researchers found that the samples often studied in research using the PEN model could create misleading results.

While past studies had shown high rates of extroversion, neuroticism, and psychoticism in criminals, researchers Rebolla, Herrera, and Collom found that this correlation might be linked as much to a person’s environment as inherited traits. They argue that extroverts “are less prone to conditioning. And this tendency increases with high [neuroticism] scores” (Rebollo, Herrera, & Colom, 2002).

The researchers argue that in order to build a conscience, conditioning is required (something that neurotic and extroverted people resist), which may lead to greater degrees of antisocial personalities among people who are highly extroverted and neurotic but don’t have social support while growing up (Rebollo, Herrera, & Colom, 2002).

The findings demonstrate that since personality traits are influenced by heredity, it is mainly through character and conditioning that a change can be developed in an individual. For instance, those who are more prone to fear and shyness can be taught coping techniques that are more congruent with social norms, allowing for better communication and integration into society.

Having explored the differences between personality and character, we can dive deeper and examine the broader characteristics associated with positive and negative traits.

The collective research on personality has helped clarify the behaviors that are more conducive to wellbeing , with a majority of those behaviors helping to cultivate resilience toward external stimuli.

Another way to interpret this is with the concept of mental strength. This ability is acquired by focusing on things under personal command, which reinforces the internal locus of control.

The behaviors that lead to mental strength are identified below (Morin, 2013):

• Mentally strong people don’t feel sorry for themselves; instead, they take responsibility for their own life.
• They don’t give away their power to others and thus maintain control over their emotions.
• Individuals with mental toughness embrace change and are open to being flexible.
• Control is placed on things under the person’s influence, such as their attitude.
• Pleasing everyone is not a priority. While being kind and fair is important, making everyone happy is not.
• There is a motivation for making calculated risks.
• Mentally strong people focus on the present and make plans for the future.
• Mentally strong people try to make better decisions in the future and try not to repeat previous missteps.
• They demonstrate an ability to appreciate and celebrate the success of other people.
• They don’t give up after a failure; instead, they keep trying until they get it right.
• Mentally strong people tolerate being alone and staying in silence.
• They don’t feel that the world owes them something; instead, they create opportunities for themselves by utilizing their own talents and merits.
• Real change takes time, and mentally strong individuals understand this, so they’re patient.

These behaviors are positively supported by characteristics such as:

• Tenacity: not giving up when things get tough or when problems arise
• Confidence : belief in personal ability to find solutions to challenges
• Optimism: the perception that the odds are in one’s favor
• Adaptability: openness to new inputs and ideas
• Self-Awareness : the ability to shift perspective
• Reliability: following through with promises and goals
• Responsibility: owning up to personal mistakes and errors
• Wellbeing: making personal mental and physical health a priority

These and other characteristics help contribute to strong mental health (Half, 2016).

This supports the idea that openness, agreeableness, and conscientiousness provide the foundation on which changes and challenges are welcomed, not shunned. In turn, this helps open doors to new possibilities and opportunities.

Specifically,

“Those whose personality tendencies tend toward empathy, cooperation, trust, and modesty (Costa & Widiger, 2002) are found to be more intrinsically motivated and find enjoyment through efforts they exert in the completion of tasks or in problem-solving. Possessing a proclivity toward mastery-approach orientation, these individuals will not shy away from challenging situations, and their desire to tackle challenges is greater than their fear of appearing unknowledgeable in front of others. In other words, they approach challenges with the full intent of mastering them.” Watson, 2012

The opposite of open-minded, calm, conscientious, and agreeable characteristics are those defined by judgment, neuroticism, and an external locus of control. Some behaviors that fall into this category are:

• Inability to accept setbacks
• Lack of clarity and decision-making
• Low capacity for critical thinking
• Failing to build strong interpersonal relations
• Always staying in the comfort zone
• Helplessness and absence of persistence
• Tendency to lean toward pessimism
• Weak imagination and an inability to visualize desired outcomes (Cardone, 2011)

Individuals with high scores in neuroticism often display narcissism, have inflated egos, and are emotionally distant, angry, hostile, and inflexible. These people tend to display the behaviors above.

Yet one key preventer of such negative traits, according to some studies, is self-control. “The more conscientious or prudent people are–no matter their other characteristics–the less likely they’ll be drawn toward harmful or illegal activities” (Chamorro-Premuzic, 2016).

Therefore, by increasing one’s self-awareness, individuals can spot their shortcomings and adopt habits to help balance out their personality traits. In turn, this helps them thrive.

Cultivating positive character traits can lead to greater success.

This is explained well by this excerpt from an article differentiating between character and personality:

“There is a direct link between positive character traits and a happy and successful life. Negative character traits that have been ‘strongly and long’ ingrained usually do cause strife at some point. But a focus on positive change can and does work.” Bell, 2010

Understanding one’s character traits and cultivating a strong desire and motivation for change can lead to better outcomes.

Here are some worksheets that can help get you and the people in your life started on this process.

There are plenty of tools for explaining character traits to kids. Here are some options for students ranging from first-graders to eighth-graders.

Fill in the Blank Worksheet

Perfect for kids in grades two through five,  this worksheet can be utilized during lessons on English, vocabulary, and writing.

Character Trait Analysis and Development

Here are 12 different worksheets designed for students in first through eighth grade. The worksheets introduce the idea of character traits and help students analyze and develop their character traits.

Lesson Plan on Character Traits

Those who teach third grade can utilize this entire lesson plan (which includes worksheets) to introduce character traits to the young students.

For Adults:

While it’s especially helpful to learn about character traits at a young age, adults can benefit from becoming more familiar with their positive and negative character traits.

Positive Traits Worksheet

At times, adults may be unable to recognize good qualities in themselves, which can prevent them from developing self-compassion and self-esteem. This worksheet describes 58 positive traits. You can the positive traits that describe yourself, which strengthens your belief in yourself and can lead to transformative conversations.

Visual of Character Traits

Sometimes a picture is worth a thousand words. Clients who are unable to verbalize their feelings or thoughts can use these handy infographics that display the opposite pairs of various character traits.

Positive and Negative Traits Quiz

Taking a test can sometimes be very enlightening. Those wishing to fill out a questionnaire rather than identify their own positive and negative character traits can respond to these 25 questions and determine their individual traits.

Introducing the concept of character to a younger audience can be difficult. But, utilizing easy-to-understand vocabulary and an interactive, visual, and fun process can assist in bringing the message home.

Teachers wishing to use the process in the classroom can take advantage of these freely available resources:

Character Traits Anchor Chart

Explaining the difference between internal and external character traits to children can be tough. By utilizing an “outside” and “inside” chart, students can begin to categorize their physical and personal traits. This technique can also be utilized to identify the differences between emotions (how a character feels) and traits (describes the personality).

Building Character in the Classroom

A rowdy classroom often leads to many impatient and distracted kids. In addition, students, especially those who live in lower-income areas, can carry a lot of emotional baggage, making it hard to stay motivated and concentrated on the subject at hand. For such situations, this is a great resource that suggests several ways for creating an inviting and an education-focused classroom.

The above research suggests that while personality traits are often hereditary and beyond our control, the things we value and believe in can reshape our character.

Expanding self-awareness is likely the first step in gaining control over one’s life. So it’s no wonder that “the most successful people are the most self-aware people” (Rosenfeld, 2016).

Awareness of others’ personalities can also be helpful, especially in situations like hiring someone for your company. And while there are many personality assessment tools to choose from, some are more consistent than others.

Cultivating an open, agreeable, and conscientious environment, whether in the office or at home, can help create values that are more conducive and supportive of growth and success. Using visualization tools to inspire, motivate, and spark interest in change is vital when aiming to align individuals and corporations toward a specific goal or mission.

Here is a great TED Talk by Dan Gilbert that summarizes this message:

Like Gilbert highlights in the video, it’s true that our personality traits are hereditary, but we still have the power to change. Our beliefs and values, which influence character, are not black or white—they adapt to our experiences and are heavily influenced by the different interactions and situations we engage in.

We are not static creatures, and just like nature, we are constantly changing. It is up to us to decide who we want to grow into. The best way to do that is to take note of where we currently are and then imagine where we want to go.

If change is the only constant, then the most successful people are those who control their own transformations.

We’d love to know your thoughts about personality and character. Have you ever taken a personality assessment, and if so, how accurate do you think it was? Do you think people can change their character? Let us know in the comments section.

We hope you enjoyed reading this article. Don’t forget to download our three Strengths Exercises for free .

• Ash, L. (2012, July 6). Can personality tests identify the real you? Retrieved from http://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-18723950
• Bech, P., Lunde, M., & Moller, S. (2012, September 4). Eysenck’s Two Big Personality Factors and Their Relationship to Depression in Patients with Chronic Idiopathic Pain Disorder: A Clinimetric Validation Analysis . Retrieved from https://www.hindawi.com/journals/isrn/2012/140458/
• Bell, J. (2010, March 26). Is There a Difference Between Character and Personality? Retrieved from https://insights.inneractiveconsulting.com/is-there-a-difference-between-character-and-personality/
• Cardone, G. (2010, September 18). The 10 Traits of Failure . Retrieved from https://www.huffingtonpost.com/grant-cardone/the-10-traits-of-failure_b_722036.html
• Chamorro-Premuzic, T. (2016, July 19). Entrepreneurs? Four Worst Personality Traits And The One That Can Redeem Them . Retrieved from https://www.fastcompany.com/3061922/entrepreneurs-four-worst-personality-traits-and-the-one-that-can-redeem-them
• Costa, P. T., Jr., & Widiger, T. A. (2002). Introduction: Personality disorders and the five-factor model of personality. In P. T. Costa, Jr. & T. A. Widiger (Eds.), Personality disorders and the five-factor model of personality (p. 3–14). Washington, DC: American Psychological Association.
• Dingfelder, S. (2013, March). New study throws into doubt the universality of the Big Five.  Retrieved from http://www.apa.org/monitor/2013/03/big-five.aspx
• ETS. (2017) Retrieved from https://www.ets.org/s/workforce_readiness/pdf/21332_big_5.pdf
• Grant, A. (2013, September 18). Goodbye to MBTI, the Fad That Won’t Die . Retrieved from https://www.huffingtonpost.com/adam-grant/goodbye-to-mbti-the-fad-t_b_3947014.html
• Grant, A. (2015, November 17). MBTI, If You Want Me Back, You Need to Change Too. Adam Grant. Medium. Retrieved from https://medium.com/@AdamMGrant/mbti-if-you-want-me-back-you-need-to-change-too-c7f1a7b6970
• Half, R. (2016, March 4). 30 Character Traits of Mentally Strong People . Retrieved from https://www.roberthalf.com/blog/management-tips/30-character-traits-of-mentally-strong-people
• Heath, A., Jardine, R., Eaves, L., & Martin, N. (1988, June 13). The Genetic Structure of Personality -II . Retrieved from https://genepi.qimr.edu.au/contents/p/staff/CV080.pdf
• John, O., Naumann, L., & Soto, C. (n.d.). Paradigm Shift to the Integrative Big Five Trait Taxonomy . Retrieved from https://www.ocf.berkeley.edu/%7Ejohnlab/pdfs/2008chapter.pdf
• John, O., & Srivastava, S. (1999, March 5). The Big-Five Trait Taxonomy . Retrieved from John, O., & Srivastava, S. (1999, March 5). Retrieved from http://moityca.com.br/pdfs/bigfive_John.pdf
• Krznaric, R. (2013, May 15). Have we all been duped by the Myers-Briggs test? Retrieved from http://fortune.com/2013/05/15/have-we-all-been-duped-by-the-myers-briggs-test/
• Kurtus, R. (n.d.). Character versus Personality by Ron Kurtus – Understanding Character: School for Champions . Retrieved from http://www.school-for-champions.com/character/character_versus_personality.htm#.Wh2ivaOZNPO
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• Morin, A. (2013, December 9). 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do | Amy Morin, LCSW. Retrieved from https://amymorinlcsw.com/mentally-strong-people/
• Pappas, S. (2017, November 16). Personality Traits & Personality Types: What is Personality? Retrieved from https://www.livescience.com/41313-personality-traits.html
• Rantanen, J., Metsäpelto, R. L., Feldt, T., Pulkkinen, L. E. A., & Kokko, K. (2007). Long‐term stability in the Big Five personality traits in adulthood. Scandinavian Journal of Psychology, 48(6) , 511-518.
• Rebollo, I., Herrero, O., & Colom, R. (2002, March 15). Personality in imprisoned and non-imprisoned people: evidence from the EPQ-R . Retrieved from http://www.psicothema.es/pdf/762.pdf
• Rosenfeld, J. (2016, August 26). Human nature is way too complex to be pinned down by personality tests . Retrieved from https://qz.com/766993/the-best-result-you-can-get-on-a-personality-test-is-one-that-you-dont-like/
• Watson, J. (2012). Educating the Disagreeable Extravert: Narcissism, the Big Five Personality Traits, and Achievement Goal Orientation . Retrieved from https://files.eric.ed.gov/fulltext/EJ977189.pdf
• Waude, A. (2017, June 14). Hans Eysenck’s PEN Model of Personality . Retrieved from https://www.psychologistworld.com/personality/pen-model-personality-eysenck
• Westerhoff, N. (2008, December 17). The “Big Five” Personality Traits . Retrieved from https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/the-big-five/

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What our readers think.

I’m 65 years old. Female. I just had a huge aha moment. I’m easily annoyed. That trait destroyed my career as a public school teacher, I’m pretty sure of that. Two people I care about are becoming increasingly hard to deal with. My roommate is in constant pain and does nothing but complain about his life. My sister is in early stages of cognitive decline. It has become work to talk to her. I want to switch my knee jerk reaction of annoyance to one of compassion. Any ideas?

Thank you for your vulnerable comment! I realize it’s a complex and brave thing to admit that you want to change how you respond to others.

Of course, I cannot give you an exact course of action, but I believe that taking the step to make this comment shows that you are committed to learning how to respond compassionately. While we offer several tools that aid in fostering self-compassion and positive communication, you might want to look into other resources that can help promote compassion-centered communication. You might want to look into The Compassionate Mind Foundation or these free Mindfulness & Compassion resources.

I hope this helps and good luck!

Kind regards, -Caroline | Community Manager

Interesting, sounds spot on to me, similar to Myers Briggs test results

Truly enjoyable. Covers the broad-spectrum. Well researched and informative. Thank you Johan de Wet

It’s interesting to note that we can be more joyful in the future by developing our character in a positive manner. It follows that our personality will be happier as well. Like bees to honey, we attract people we strive to be. Virtues, such as humility, honesty, peace, and gratitude are much better than vices, such as pride, greed, dishonesty, sloth, etc. Virtues give us hope for our future and are our greatest assets.

Fantastic information! This is very useful. Thank you!

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Personality Traits Essay

The study of personality traits has always been a fascinating subject for researchers. In this personality traits essay, the author dives into the personality theories that explain an individual’s unique personality. From extroversion to conscientiousness, this essay on personality traits will explore the different elements that shape our behavior and interactions with the world. The paper aims to comprehensively understand the complexity of human personality and its impact on our daily lives.

Introduction

Research/theories.

Different individuals are characterized by different physiological and psychological characteristics or values. Collectively, these factors contribute significantly to the nature of the behavior of these individuals. The term personality trait refers to these intrinsic differences in individuals that remain outstanding and stable throughout the life of the individuals.

In many individuals these intrinsic differences remain a personal and constant aspect that explains why the individual behave or react towards situations the way the do. Personality theories explain that individuals have distinctive and characteristic behavior which remains distinctive throughout a variety of situations.

Humans are in one way or another compelled to articulating a certain behavioral pattern and to identify or note differences in the way other people behave. (Emotional Competency, 2009).

Personality trait theories try to explain the differences in behavior patterns that are displayed by different personalities in similar situations. They as well try to explain why individuals behave differently in such situations. An individual can be said to be cheerful, talkative, cold, compulsive, and intelligent.

It can be noted that these personality traits remains more or less consistent over a long period of time or probably they last over a life time. What brings continuity in a person’s behavior characteristic is described as his or her personality.

Lexical hypothesis has found it extended application in describing personality traits. According to the hypothesis, people become used to characteristic differences more and more until they finally get engrossed into their languages of communication.

The hypothesis argue that the more important a difference is, the more people will notice it and the more they will talk about it and consequently they will invent a word for it. (Emotional Competency, 2009).

Researchers extracted from a list of 18000 words and came up with the Big Five Personality Factors. There factors happens to be very similar to the Five Factor Model of Personality. These Five Personality Factors includes:

• Extraversion. Examples include talkative, extroverted, aggressive, bold, assertive, unrestrained, shy, quiet, untalkative and confident.
• Agreeableness. Examples include sympathetic, kind, warm, considerate, cold, unsympathetic, unkind, helpful, affectionate and truthful.
• Conscientiousness. Examples include organized, orderly, neat, disorganized, disorderly, careless and sloppy.
• Emotional stability. Examples include relaxed, unenvious, unexcitable, patient, moody, temperamental, touchy, envious irritable and self-pity.
• Intellect. Examples include creative, intellectual, imaginative, philosophical, unimaginative, uncreative, unsophisticated and imperceptive. (Emotional Competency, 2009).

As earlier stated, personality traits last for long period of time and in many cases they extend throughout the life of the individual. Sources have shown that it is these personal attributes that form integration web among our communities. In the process of understanding oneself, it becomes substantially important for one to understand, accept and apply his or her personality traits. (Emotional Competency, 2009).

Social unacceptability is connected to social inclusion or exclusion from certain social groupings. The issue of exclusion or inclusion is a major decision the humans as social animals have to take care of. An individual is either included or excluded from certain social entities.

A different approach on defining personality trait aimed at identifying descriptive nouns. From this research, there was development of the Eight Factor Model of Personality traits. According to this model, the eight factors that are a part and parcel of people personality tarts are; social unacceptability, intellect, egocentrism, ruggedness, delinquency, attractiveness, liveliness and disorientation.

According to this development, characteristic traits such as lawbreaker, alcoholic, rebel, comedian, speculator, daydreamer, tough, dummy, moron, poet, aggressor and many others were developed. (Emotional Competency, 2009). The above eight factors can be seen to correlate with people primal concerns as follows:

• Intellect refers to the level of enlightenment in matters that affect the community at large. The levels of intelligency place humans at different social orientations. Sometimes the level of intelligence is seen as the levels of evolutionary advancement and therefore distinguishes humans that belong to a certain generational grouping.
• Egocentrism on the other hand relates to lack of empathy and concern for others. It sometimes can be presented as a false self-image or someone being overzealous.
• The fourth factor, ruggedness relates to aggression, dominance and hunger to attain power.
• Delinquency is more or less similar to cheating. The importance and effectiveness of cheater detectors within the society cannot be overemphasized as explained in the theory of reciprocal altruism.
• Sex and procreating are bonded together in this sixth factor of personality trait.
• Factor seven is related to attracting attention. This factor is termed as important in attracting attention especially from mates of the opposite sex.
• Disorientation relates to reliability and competence of a person. (Emotional Competency, 2009).

According to the developed theories, personality trait understanding are very critical if understanding different behavior patterns that are displayed by different persons is anything to go by.(Emotional Competency, 2009).

It is therefore important to understand ones personal trait so that if there is anything negative about how e behave, one can consider the possibility of averting from it. This is necessary because some of these traits are detrimental in the way we live and relate with those who live with us. (Emotional Competency, 2009).

Emotional Competency. (2009). Personality Traits . Web.

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Home — Essay Samples — Life — About Myself — Characteristics Of Myself Essay

Characteristics of Myself Essay

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10 Personal Statement Essay Examples That Worked

What’s covered:, what is a personal statement.

• Essay 1: Summer Program
• Essay 2: Being Bangladeshi-American
• Essay 3: Why Medicine
• Essay 4: Love of Writing
• Essay 5: Starting a Fire
• Essay 6: Dedicating a Track
• Essay 7: Body Image and Eating Disorders
• Essay 8: Becoming a Coach
• Essay 9: Eritrea
• Essay 10: Journaling
• Is Your Personal Statement Strong Enough?

Your personal statement is any essay that you must write for your main application, such as the Common App Essay , University of California Essays , or Coalition Application Essay . This type of essay focuses on your unique experiences, ideas, or beliefs that may not be discussed throughout the rest of your application. This essay should be an opportunity for the admissions officers to get to know you better and give them a glimpse into who you really are.

In this post, we will share 10 different personal statements that were all written by real students. We will also provide commentary on what each essay did well and where there is room for improvement, so you can make your personal statement as strong as possible!

Please note: Looking at examples of real essays students have submitted to colleges can be very beneficial to get inspiration for your essays. You should never copy or plagiarize from these examples when writing your own essays. Colleges can tell when an essay isn’t genuine and will not view students favorably if they plagiarized. 

Personal Statement Examples

Essay example #1: exchange program.

The twisting roads, ornate mosaics, and fragrant scent of freshly ground spices had been so foreign at first. Now in my fifth week of the SNYI-L summer exchange program in Morocco, I felt more comfortable in the city. With a bag full of pastries from the market, I navigated to a bus stop, paid the fare, and began the trip back to my host family’s house. It was hard to believe that only a few years earlier my mom was worried about letting me travel around my home city on my own, let alone a place that I had only lived in for a few weeks. While I had been on a journey towards self-sufficiency and independence for a few years now, it was Morocco that pushed me to become the confident, self-reflective person that I am today.

As a child, my parents pressured me to achieve perfect grades, master my swim strokes, and discover interesting hobbies like playing the oboe and learning to pick locks. I felt compelled to live my life according to their wishes. Of course, this pressure was not a wholly negative factor in my life –– you might even call it support. However, the constant presence of my parents’ hopes for me overcame my own sense of desire and led me to become quite dependent on them. I pushed myself to get straight A’s, complied with years of oboe lessons, and dutifully attended hours of swim practice after school. Despite all these achievements, I felt like I had no sense of self beyond my drive for success. I had always been expected to succeed on the path they had defined. However, this path was interrupted seven years after my parents’ divorce when my dad moved across the country to Oregon.

I missed my dad’s close presence, but I loved my new sense of freedom. My parents’ separation allowed me the space to explore my own strengths and interests as each of them became individually busier. As early as middle school, I was riding the light rail train by myself, reading maps to get myself home, and applying to special academic programs without urging from my parents. Even as I took more initiatives on my own, my parents both continued to see me as somewhat immature. All of that changed three years ago, when I applied and was accepted to the SNYI-L summer exchange program in Morocco. I would be studying Arabic and learning my way around the city of Marrakesh. Although I think my parents were a little surprised when I told them my news, the addition of a fully-funded scholarship convinced them to let me go.

I lived with a host family in Marrakesh and learned that they, too, had high expectations for me. I didn’t know a word of Arabic, and although my host parents and one brother spoke good English, they knew I was there to learn. If I messed up, they patiently corrected me but refused to let me fall into the easy pattern of speaking English just as I did at home. Just as I had when I was younger, I felt pressured and stressed about meeting their expectations. However, one day, as I strolled through the bustling market square after successfully bargaining with one of the street vendors, I realized my mistake. My host family wasn’t being unfair by making me fumble through Arabic. I had applied for this trip, and I had committed to the intensive language study. My host family’s rules about speaking Arabic at home had not been to fulfill their expectations for me, but to help me fulfill my expectations for myself. Similarly, the pressure my parents had put on me as a child had come out of love and their hopes for me, not out of a desire to crush my individuality.

As my bus drove through the still-bustling market square and past the medieval Ben-Youssef madrasa, I realized that becoming independent was a process, not an event. I thought that my parents’ separation when I was ten had been the one experience that would transform me into a self-motivated and autonomous person. It did, but that didn’t mean that I didn’t still have room to grow. Now, although I am even more self-sufficient than I was three years ago, I try to approach every experience with the expectation that it will change me. It’s still difficult, but I understand that just because growth can be uncomfortable doesn’t mean it’s not important.

What the Essay Did Well

This is a nice essay because it delves into particular character trait of the student and how it has been shaped and matured over time. Although it doesn’t focus the essay around a specific anecdote, the essay is still successful because it is centered around this student’s independence. This is a nice approach for a personal statement: highlight a particular trait of yours and explore how it has grown with you.

The ideas in this essay are universal to growing up—living up to parents’ expectations, yearning for freedom, and coming to terms with reality—but it feels unique to the student because of the inclusion of details specific to them. Including their oboe lessons, the experience of riding the light rail by themselves, and the negotiations with a street vendor helps show the reader what these common tropes of growing up looked like for them personally. 

Another strength of the essay is the level of self-reflection included throughout the piece. Since there is no central anecdote tying everything together, an essay about a character trait is only successful when you deeply reflect on how you felt, where you made mistakes, and how that trait impacts your life. The author includes reflection in sentences like “ I felt like I had no sense of self beyond my drive for success, ” and “ I understand that just because growth can be uncomfortable doesn’t mean it’s not important. ” These sentences help us see how the student was impacted and what their point of view is.

What Could Be Improved

The largest change this essay would benefit from is to show not tell. The platitude you have heard a million times no doubt, but for good reason. This essay heavily relies on telling the reader what occurred, making us less engaged as the entire reading experience feels more passive. If the student had shown us what happens though, it keeps the reader tied to the action and makes them feel like they are there with the student, making it much more enjoyable to read. 

For example, they tell us about the pressure to succeed their parents placed on them: “ I pushed myself to get straight A’s, complied with years of oboe lessons, and dutifully attended hours of swim practice after school.”  They could have shown us what that pressure looked like with a sentence like this: “ My stomach turned somersaults as my rattling knee thumped against the desk before every test, scared to get anything less than a 95. For five years the painful squawk of the oboe only reminded me of my parents’ claps and whistles at my concerts. I mastered the butterfly, backstroke, and freestyle, fighting against the anchor of their expectations threatening to pull me down.”

If the student had gone through their essay and applied this exercise of bringing more detail and colorful language to sentences that tell the reader what happened, the essay would be really great. 

Table of Contents

Essay Example #2: Being Bangladeshi-American

Life before was good: verdant forests, sumptuous curries, and a devoted family.

Then, my family abandoned our comfortable life in Bangladesh for a chance at the American dream in Los Angeles. Within our first year, my father was diagnosed with thyroid cancer. He lost his battle three weeks before my sixth birthday. Facing a new country without the steady presence of my father, we were vulnerable — prisoners of hardship in the land of the free. We resettled in the Bronx, in my uncle’s renovated basement. It was meant to be our refuge, but I felt more displaced than ever. Gone were the high-rise condos of West L.A.; instead, government projects towered over the neighborhood. Pedestrians no longer smiled and greeted me; the atmosphere was hostile, even toxic. Schoolkids were quick to pick on those they saw as weak or foreign, hurling harsh words I’d never heard before.

Meanwhile, my family began integrating into the local Bangladeshi community. I struggled to understand those who shared my heritage. Bangladeshi mothers stayed home while fathers drove cabs and sold fruit by the roadside — painful societal positions. Riding on crosstown buses or walking home from school, I began to internalize these disparities. During my fleeting encounters with affluent Upper East Siders, I saw kids my age with nannies, parents who wore suits to work, and luxurious apartments with spectacular views. Most took cabs to their destinations: cabs that Bangladeshis drove. I watched the mundane moments of their lives with longing, aching to plant myself in their shoes. Shame prickled down my spine. I distanced myself from my heritage, rejecting the traditional panjabis worn on Eid and refusing the torkari we ate for dinner every day. 

As I grappled with my relationship with the Bangladeshi community, I turned my attention to helping my Bronx community by pursuing an internship with Assemblyman Luis Sepulveda. I handled desk work and took calls, spending the bulk of my time actively listening to the hardships constituents faced — everything from a veteran stripped of his benefits to a grandmother unable to support her bedridden grandchild.

I’d never exposed myself to stories like these, and now I was the first to hear them. As an intern, I could only assist in what felt like the small ways — pointing out local job offerings, printing information on free ESL classes, reaching out to non-profits. But to a community facing an onslaught of intense struggles, I realized that something as small as these actions could have vast impacts. Seeing the immediate consequences of my actions inspired me. Throughout that summer, I internalized my community’s daily challenges in a new light. I began to stop seeing the prevalent underemployment and cramped living quarters less as sources of shame. Instead, I saw them as realities that had to be acknowledged, but could ultimately be remedied. I also realized the benefits of the Bangladeshi culture I had been so ashamed of. My Bangla language skills were an asset to the office, and my understanding of Bangladeshi etiquette allowed for smooth communication between office staff and its constituents. As I helped my neighbors navigate city services, I saw my heritage with pride — a perspective I never expected to have.

I can now appreciate the value of my unique culture and background, and of living with less. This perspective offers room for progress, community integration, and a future worth fighting for. My time with Assemblyman Sepulveda’s office taught me that I can be a change agent in enabling this progression. Far from being ashamed of my community, I want to someday return to local politics in the Bronx to continue helping others access the American Dream. I hope to help my community appreciate the opportunity to make progress together. By embracing reality, I learned to live it. Along the way, I discovered one thing: life is good, but we can make it better.

This student’s passion for social justice and civic duty shines through in this essay because of how honest it is. Sharing their personal experience with immigrating, moving around, being an outsider, and finding a community allows us to see the hardships this student has faced and builds empathy towards their situation. However, what really makes it strong is that they go beyond describing the difficulties they faced and explain the mental impact it had on them as a child: Shame prickled down my spine. I distanced myself from my heritage, rejecting the traditional panjabis worn on Eid and refusing the torkari we ate for dinner every day. 

The rejection of their culture presented at the beginning of the essay creates a nice juxtaposition with the student’s view in the latter half of the essay and helps demonstrate how they have matured. They use their experience interning as a way to delve into a change in their thought process about their culture and show how their passion for social justice began. Using this experience as a mechanism to explore their thoughts and feelings is an excellent example of how items that are included elsewhere on your application should be incorporated into your essay.

This essay prioritizes emotions and personal views over specific anecdotes. Although there are details and certain moments incorporated throughout to emphasize the author’s points, the main focus remains on the student and how they grapple with their culture and identity.  

One area for improvement is the conclusion. Although the forward-looking approach is a nice way to end an essay focused on social justice, it would be nice to include more details and imagery in the conclusion. How does the student want to help their community? What government position do they see themselves holding one day? 

A more impactful ending might look like the student walking into their office at the New York City Housing Authority in 15 years and looking at the plans to build a new development in the Bronx just blocks away from where the grew up that would provide quality housing to people in their Bangladeshi community. They would smile while thinking about how far they have come from that young kid who used to be ashamed of their culture. 

Essay Example #3: Why Medicine

I took my first trip to China to visit my cousin Anna in July of 2014. Distance had kept us apart, but when we were together, we fell into all of our old inside jokes and caught up on each other’s lives. Her sparkling personality and optimistic attitude always brought a smile to my face. This time, however, my heart broke when I saw the effects of her brain cancer; she had suffered from a stroke that paralyzed her left side. She was still herself in many ways, but I could see that the damage to her brain made things difficult for her. I stayed by her every day, providing the support she needed, whether assisting her with eating and drinking, reading to her, or just watching “Friends.” During my flight back home, sorrow and helplessness overwhelmed me. Would I ever see Anna again? Could I have done more to make Anna comfortable? I wished I could stay in China longer to care for her. As I deplaned, I wondered if I could transform my grief to help other children and teenagers in the US who suffered as Anna did.

The day after I got home, as jet lag dragged me awake a few minutes after midnight, I remembered hearing about the Family Reach Foundation (FRF) and its work with children going through treatments at the local hospital and their families. I began volunteering in the FRF’s Children’s Activity Room, where I play with children battling cancer. Volunteering has both made me appreciate my own health and also cherish the new relationships I build with the children and families. We play sports, make figures out of playdoh, and dress up. When they take on the roles of firefighters or fairies, we all get caught up in the game; for that time, they forget the sanitized, stark, impersonal walls of the pediatric oncology ward. Building close relationships with them and seeing them giggle and laugh is so rewarding — I love watching them grow and get better throughout their course of treatment.

Hearing from the parents about their children’s condition and seeing the children recover inspired me to consider medical research. To get started, I enrolled in a summer collegelevel course in Abnormal Psychology. There I worked with Catelyn, a rising college senior, on a data analysis project regarding Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID). Together, we examined the neurological etiology of DID by studying four fMRI and PET cases. I fell in love with gathering data and analyzing the results and was amazed by our final product: several stunning brain images showcasing the areas of hyper and hypoactivity in brains affected by DID. Desire quickly followed my amazement — I want to continue this project and study more brains. Their complexity, delicacy, and importance to every aspect of life fascinate me. Successfully completing this research project gave me a sense of hope; I know I am capable of participating in a large scale research project and potentially making a difference in someone else’s life through my research.

Anna’s diagnosis inspired me to begin volunteering at FRF; from there, I discovered my desire to help people further by contributing to medical research. As my research interest blossomed, I realized that it’s no coincidence that I want to study brains—after all, Anna suffered from brain cancer. Reflecting on these experiences this past year and a half, I see that everything I’ve done is connected. Sadly, a few months after I returned from China, Anna passed away. I am still sad, but as I run a toy truck across the floor and watch one of the little patients’ eyes light up, I imagine that she would be proud of my commitment to pursue medicine and study the brain.

This essay has a very strong emotional core that tugs at the heart strings and makes the reader feel invested. Writing about sickness can be difficult and doesn’t always belong in a personal statement, but in this case it works well because the focus is on how this student cared for her cousin and dealt with the grief and emotions surrounding her condition. Writing about the compassion she showed and the doubts and concerns that filled her mind keeps the focus on the author and her personality. 

This continues when she again discusses the activities she did with the kids at FRF and the personal reflection this experience allowed her to have. For example, she writes: Volunteering has both made me appreciate my own health and also cherish the new relationships I build with the children and families. We play sports, make figures out of playdoh, and dress up.

Concluding the essay with the sad story of her cousin’s passing brings the essay full circle and returns to the emotional heart of the piece to once again build a connection with the reader. However, it finishes on a hopeful note and demonstrates how this student has been able to turn a tragic experience into a source of lifelong inspiration. 

One thing this essay should be cognizant of is that personal statements should not read as summaries of your extracurricular resume. Although this essay doesn’t fully fall into that trap, it does describe two key extracurriculars the student participated in. However, the inclusion of such a strong emotional core running throughout the essay helps keep the focus on the student and her thoughts and feelings during these activities.

To avoid making this mistake, make sure you have a common thread running through your essay and the extracurriculars provide support to the story you are trying to tell, rather than crafting a story around your activities. And, as this essay does, make sure there is lots of personal reflection and feelings weaved throughout to focus attention to you rather than your extracurriculars. 

Essay Example #4: Love of Writing

“I want to be a writer.” This had been my answer to every youthful discussion with the adults in my life about what I would do when I grew up. As early as elementary school, I remember reading my writing pieces aloud to an audience at “Author of the Month” ceremonies. Bearing this goal in mind, and hoping to gain some valuable experience, I signed up for a journalism class during my freshman year. Despite my love for writing, I initially found myself uninterested in the subject and I struggled to enjoy the class. When I thought of writing, I imagined lyrical prose, profound poetry, and thrilling plot lines. Journalism required a laconic style and orderly structure, and I found my teacher’s assignments formulaic and dull. That class shook my confidence as a writer. I was uncertain if I should continue in it for the rest of my high school career.

Despite my misgivings, I decided that I couldn’t make a final decision on whether to quit journalism until I had some experience working for a paper outside of the classroom. The following year, I applied to be a staff reporter on our school newspaper. I hoped this would help me become more self-driven and creative, rather than merely writing articles that my teacher assigned. To my surprise, my time on staff was worlds away from what I experienced in the journalism class. Although I was unaccustomed to working in a fast-paced environment and initially found it burdensome to research and complete high-quality stories in a relatively short amount of time, I also found it exciting. I enjoyed learning more about topics and events on campus that I did not know much about; some of my stories that I covered in my first semester concerned a chess tournament, a food drive, and a Spanish immersion party. I relished in the freedom I had to explore and learn, and to write more independently than I could in a classroom.

Although I enjoyed many aspects of working for the paper immediately, reporting also pushed me outside of my comfort zone. I am a shy person, and speaking with people I did not know intimidated me. During my first interview, I met with the basketball coach to prepare for a story about the team’s winning streak. As I approached his office, I felt everything from my toes to my tongue freeze into a solid block, and I could hardly get out my opening questions. Fortunately, the coach was very kind and helped me through the conversation. Encouraged, I prepared for my next interview with more confidence. After a few weeks of practice, I even started to look forward to interviewing people on campus. That first journalism class may have bored me, but even if journalism in practice was challenging, it was anything but tedious.

Over the course of that year, I grew to love writing for our school newspaper. Reporting made me aware of my surroundings, and made me want to know more about current events on campus and in the town where I grew up. By interacting with people all over campus, I came to understand the breadth of individuals and communities that make up my high school. I felt far more connected to diverse parts of my school through my work as a journalist, and I realized that journalism gave me a window into seeing beyond my own experiences. The style of news writing may be different from what I used to think “writing” meant, but I learned that I can still derive exciting plots from events that may have gone unnoticed if not for my stories. I no longer struggle to approach others, and truly enjoy getting to know people and recognizing their accomplishments through my writing. Becoming a writer may be a difficult path, but it is as rewarding as I hoped when I was young.

This essay is clearly structured in a manner that makes it flow very nicely and contributes to its success. It starts with a quote to draw in the reader and show this student’s life-long passion for writing. Then it addresses the challenges of facing new, unfamiliar territory and how this student overcame it. Finally, it concludes by reflecting on this eye-opening experience and a nod to their younger self from the introduction. Having a well-thought out and sequential structure with clear transitions makes it extremely easy for the reader to follow along and take away the main idea.

Another positive aspect of the essay is the use of strong and expressive language. Sentences like “ When I thought of writing, I imagined lyrical prose, profound poetry, and thrilling plot lines ” stand out because of the intentional use of words like “lyrical”, “profound”, and “thrilling” to convey the student’s love of writing. The author also uses an active voice to capture the readers’ attention and keep us engaged. They rely on their language and diction to reveal details to the reader, for instance saying “ I felt everything from my toes to my tongue freeze into a solid block ” to describe feeling nervous.

This essay is already very strong, so there isn’t much that needs to be changed. One thing that could take the essay from great to outstanding would be to throw in more quotes, internal dialogue, and sensory descriptors.

It would be nice to see the nerves they felt interviewing the coach by including dialogue like “ Um…I want to interview you about…uh…”.  They could have shown their original distaste for journalism by narrating the thoughts running through their head. The fast-paced environment of their newspaper could have come to life with descriptions about the clacking of keyboards and the whirl of people running around laying out articles.

Essay Example #5: Starting a Fire

Was I no longer the beloved daughter of nature, whisperer of trees? Knee-high rubber boots, camouflage, bug spray—I wore the garb and perfume of a proud wild woman, yet there I was, hunched over the pathetic pile of stubborn sticks, utterly stumped, on the verge of tears. As a child, I had considered myself a kind of rustic princess, a cradler of spiders and centipedes, who was serenaded by mourning doves and chickadees, who could glide through tick-infested meadows and emerge Lyme-free. I knew the cracks of the earth like the scars on my own rough palms. Yet here I was, ten years later, incapable of performing the most fundamental outdoor task: I could not, for the life of me, start a fire. 

Furiously I rubbed the twigs together—rubbed and rubbed until shreds of skin flaked from my fingers. No smoke. The twigs were too young, too sticky-green; I tossed them away with a shower of curses, and began tearing through the underbrush in search of a more flammable collection. My efforts were fruitless. Livid, I bit a rejected twig, determined to prove that the forest had spurned me, offering only young, wet bones that would never burn. But the wood cracked like carrots between my teeth—old, brittle, and bitter. Roaring and nursing my aching palms, I retreated to the tent, where I sulked and awaited the jeers of my family. 

Rattling their empty worm cans and reeking of fat fish, my brother and cousins swaggered into the campsite. Immediately, they noticed the minor stick massacre by the fire pit and called to me, their deep voices already sharp with contempt. 

“Where’s the fire, Princess Clara?” they taunted. “Having some trouble?” They prodded me with the ends of the chewed branches and, with a few effortless scrapes of wood on rock, sparked a red and roaring flame. My face burned long after I left the fire pit. The camp stank of salmon and shame. 

In the tent, I pondered my failure. Was I so dainty? Was I that incapable? I thought of my hands, how calloused and capable they had been, how tender and smooth they had become. It had been years since I’d kneaded mud between my fingers; instead of scaling a white pine, I’d practiced scales on my piano, my hands softening into those of a musician—fleshy and sensitive. And I’d gotten glasses, having grown horrifically nearsighted; long nights of dim lighting and thick books had done this. I couldn’t remember the last time I had lain down on a hill, barefaced, and seen the stars without having to squint. Crawling along the edge of the tent, a spider confirmed my transformation—he disgusted me, and I felt an overwhelming urge to squash him. 

Yet, I realized I hadn’t really changed—I had only shifted perspective. I still eagerly explored new worlds, but through poems and prose rather than pastures and puddles. I’d grown to prefer the boom of a bass over that of a bullfrog, learned to coax a different kind of fire from wood, having developed a burn for writing rhymes and scrawling hypotheses. 

That night, I stayed up late with my journal and wrote about the spider I had decided not to kill. I had tolerated him just barely, only shrieking when he jumped—it helped to watch him decorate the corners of the tent with his delicate webs, knowing that he couldn’t start fires, either. When the night grew cold and the embers died, my words still smoked—my hands burned from all that scrawling—and even when I fell asleep, the ideas kept sparking—I was on fire, always on fire.

This student is an excellent writer, which allows a simple story to be outstandingly compelling. The author articulates her points beautifully and creatively through her immense use of details and figurative language. Lines like “a rustic princess, a cradler of spiders and centipedes, who was serenaded by mourning doves and chickadees,” and “rubbed and rubbed until shreds of skin flaked from my fingers,” create vivid images that draw the reader in. 

The flowery and descriptive prose also contributes to the nice juxtaposition between the old Clara and the new Clara. The latter half of the essay contrasts elements of nature with music and writing to demonstrate how natural these interests are for her now. This sentence perfectly encapsulates the contrast she is trying to build: “It had been years since I’d kneaded mud between my fingers; instead of scaling a white pine, I’d practiced scales on my piano, my hands softening into those of a musician—fleshy and sensitive.”

In addition to being well-written, this essay is thematically cohesive. It begins with the simple introduction “Fire!” and ends with the following image: “When the night grew cold and the embers died, my words still smoked—my hands burned from all that scrawling—and even when I fell asleep, the ideas kept sparking—I was on fire, always on fire.” This full-circle approach leaves readers satisfied and impressed.

There is very little this essay should change, however one thing to be cautious about is having an essay that is overly-descriptive. We know from the essay that this student likes to read and write, and depending on other elements of her application, it might make total sense to have such a flowery and ornate writing style. However, your personal statement needs to reflect your voice as well as your personality. If you would never use language like this in conversation or your writing, don’t put it in your personal statement. Make sure there is a balance between eloquence and your personal voice.

Essay Example #6: Dedicating a Track

“Getting beat is one thing – it’s part of competing – but I want no part in losing.” Coach Rob Stark’s motto never fails to remind me of his encouragement on early-morning bus rides to track meets around the state. I’ve always appreciated the phrase, but an experience last June helped me understand its more profound, universal meaning.

Stark, as we affectionately call him, has coached track at my high school for 25 years. His care, dedication, and emphasis on developing good character has left an enduring impact on me and hundreds of other students. Not only did he help me discover my talent and love for running, but he also taught me the importance of commitment and discipline and to approach every endeavor with the passion and intensity that I bring to running. When I learned a neighboring high school had dedicated their track to a longtime coach, I felt that Stark deserved similar honors.

Our school district’s board of education indicated they would only dedicate our track to Stark if I could demonstrate that he was extraordinary. I took charge and mobilized my teammates to distribute petitions, reach out to alumni, and compile statistics on the many team and individual champions Stark had coached over the years. We received astounding support, collecting almost 3,000 signatures and pages of endorsements from across the community. With help from my teammates, I presented this evidence to the board.

They didn’t bite. 

Most members argued that dedicating the track was a low priority. Knowing that we had to act quickly to convince them of its importance, I called a team meeting where we drafted a rebuttal for the next board meeting. To my surprise, they chose me to deliver it. I was far from the best public speaker in the group, and I felt nervous about going before the unsympathetic board again. However, at that second meeting, I discovered that I enjoy articulating and arguing for something that I’m passionate about.

Public speaking resembles a cross country race. Walking to the starting line, you have to trust your training and quell your last minute doubts. When the gun fires, you can’t think too hard about anything; your performance has to be instinctual, natural, even relaxed. At the next board meeting, the podium was my starting line. As I walked up to it, familiar butterflies fluttered in my stomach. Instead of the track stretching out in front of me, I faced the vast audience of teachers, board members, and my teammates. I felt my adrenaline build, and reassured myself: I’ve put in the work, my argument is powerful and sound. As the board president told me to introduce myself, I heard, “runners set” in the back of my mind. She finished speaking, and Bang! The brief silence was the gunshot for me to begin. 

The next few minutes blurred together, but when the dust settled, I knew from the board members’ expressions and the audience’s thunderous approval that I had run quite a race. Unfortunately, it wasn’t enough; the board voted down our proposal. I was disappointed, but proud of myself, my team, and our collaboration off the track. We stood up for a cause we believed in, and I overcame my worries about being a leader. Although I discovered that changing the status quo through an elected body can be a painstakingly difficult process and requires perseverance, I learned that I enjoy the challenges this effort offers. Last month, one of the school board members joked that I had become a “regular” – I now often show up to meetings to advocate for a variety of causes, including better environmental practices in cafeterias and safer equipment for athletes.

Just as Stark taught me, I worked passionately to achieve my goal. I may have been beaten when I appealed to the board, but I certainly didn’t lose, and that would have made Stark proud.

This essay effectively conveys this student’s compassion for others, initiative, and determination—all great qualities to exemplify in a personal statement!

Although they rely on telling us a lot of what happened up until the board meeting, the use of running a race (their passion) as a metaphor for public speaking provides a lot of insight into the fear that this student overcame to work towards something bigger than themself. Comparing a podium to the starting line, the audience to the track, and silence to the gunshot is a nice way of demonstrating this student’s passion for cross country running without making that the focus of the story.

The essay does a nice job of coming full circle at the end by explaining what the quote from the beginning meant to them after this experience. Without explicitly saying “ I now know that what Stark actually meant is…” they rely on the strength of their argument above to make it obvious to the reader what it means to get beat but not lose. 

One of the biggest areas of improvement in the intro, however, is how the essay tells us Stark’s impact rather than showing us: His care, dedication, and emphasis on developing good character has left an enduring impact on me and hundreds of other students. Not only did he help me discover my talent and love for running, but he also taught me the importance of commitment and discipline and to approach every endeavor with the passion and intensity that I bring to running.

The writer could’ve helped us feel a stronger emotional connection to Stark if they had included examples of Stark’s qualities, rather than explicitly stating them. For example, they could’ve written something like: Stark was the kind of person who would give you gas money if you told him your parents couldn’t afford to pick you up from practice. And he actually did that—several times. At track meets, alumni regularly would come talk to him and tell him how he’d changed their lives. Before Stark, I was ambivalent about running and was on the JV team, but his encouragement motivated me to run longer and harder and eventually make varsity. Because of him, I approach every endeavor with the passion and intensity that I bring to running.

Essay Example #7: Body Image and Eating Disorders

I press the “discover” button on my Instagram app, hoping to find enticing pictures to satisfy my boredom. Scrolling through, I see funny videos and mouth-watering pictures of food. However, one image stops me immediately. A fit teenage girl with a “perfect body” relaxes in a bikini on a beach. Beneath it, I see a slew of flattering comments. I shake with disapproval over the image’s unrealistic quality. However, part of me still wants to have a body like hers so that others will make similar comments to me.

I would like to resolve a silent issue that harms many teenagers and adults: negative self image and low self-esteem in a world where social media shapes how people view each other. When people see the façades others wear to create an “ideal” image, they can develop poor thought patterns rooted in negative self-talk. The constant comparisons to “perfect” others make people feel small. In this new digital age, it is hard to distinguish authentic from artificial representations.

When I was 11, I developed anorexia nervosa. Though I was already thin, I wanted to be skinny like the models that I saw on the magazine covers on the grocery store stands. Little did I know that those models probably also suffered from disorders, and that photoshop erased their flaws. I preferred being underweight to being healthy. No matter how little I ate or how thin I was, I always thought that I was too fat. I became obsessed with the number on the scale and would try to eat the least that I could without my parents urging me to take more. Fortunately, I stopped engaging in anorexic behaviors before middle school. However, my underlying mental habits did not change. The images that had provoked my disorder in the first place were still a constant presence in my life.

By age 15, I was in recovery from anorexia, but suffered from depression. While I used to only compare myself to models, the growth of social media meant I also compared myself to my friends and acquaintances. I felt left out when I saw my friends’ excitement about lake trips they had taken without me. As I scrolled past endless photos of my flawless, thin classmates with hundreds of likes and affirming comments, I felt my jealousy spiral. I wanted to be admired and loved by other people too. However, I felt that I could never be enough. I began to hate the way that I looked, and felt nothing in my life was good enough. I wanted to be called “perfect” and “body goals,” so I tried to only post at certain times of day to maximize my “likes.” When that didn’t work, I started to feel too anxious to post anything at all.  

Body image insecurities and social media comparisons affect thousands of people – men, women, children, and adults – every day. I am lucky – after a few months of my destructive social media habits, I came across a video that pointed out the illusory nature of social media; many Instagram posts only show off good things while people hide their flaws. I began going to therapy, and recovered from my depression. To address the problem of self-image and social media, we can all focus on what matters on the inside and not what is on the surface. As an effort to become healthy internally, I started a club at my school to promote clean eating and radiating beauty from within. It has helped me grow in my confidence, and today I’m not afraid to show others my struggles by sharing my experience with eating disorders. Someday, I hope to make this club a national organization to help teenagers and adults across the country. I support the idea of body positivity and embracing difference, not “perfection.” After all, how can we be ourselves if we all look the same?

This essay covers the difficult topics of eating disorders and mental health. If you’re thinking about covering similar topics in your essay, we recommend reading our post Should You Talk About Mental Health in College Essays?

The short answer is that, yes, you can talk about mental health, but it can be risky. If you do go that route, it’s important to focus on what you learned from the experience.

The strength of this essay is the student’s vulnerability, in excerpts such as this: I wanted to be admired and loved by other people too. However, I felt that I could never be enough. I began to hate the way that I looked, and felt nothing in my life was good enough. I wanted to be called “perfect” and “body goals,” so I tried to only post at certain times of day to maximize my “likes.”

The student goes on to share how they recovered from their depression through an eye-opening video and therapy sessions, and they’re now helping others find their self-worth as well. It’s great that this essay looks towards the future and shares the writer’s goals of making their club a national organization; we can see their ambition and compassion.

The main weakness of this essay is that it doesn’t focus enough on their recovery process, which is arguably the most important part. They could’ve told us more about the video they watched or the process of starting their club and the interactions they’ve had with other members. Especially when sharing such a vulnerable topic, there should be vulnerability in the recovery process too. That way, the reader can fully appreciate all that this student has overcome.

Essay Example #8: Becoming a Coach

”Advanced females ages 13 to 14 please proceed to staging with your coaches at this time.” Skittering around the room, eyes wide and pleading, I frantically explained my situation to nearby coaches. The seconds ticked away in my head; every polite refusal increased my desperation.

Despair weighed me down. I sank to my knees as a stream of competitors, coaches, and officials flowed around me. My dojang had no coach, and the tournament rules prohibited me from competing without one.

Although I wanted to remain strong, doubts began to cloud my mind. I could not help wondering: what was the point of perfecting my skills if I would never even compete? The other members of my team, who had found coaches minutes earlier, attempted to comfort me, but I barely heard their words. They couldn’t understand my despair at being left on the outside, and I never wanted them to understand.

Since my first lesson 12 years ago, the members of my dojang have become family. I have watched them grow up, finding my own happiness in theirs. Together, we have honed our kicks, blocks, and strikes. We have pushed one another to aim higher and become better martial artists. Although my dojang had searched for a reliable coach for years, we had not found one. When we attended competitions in the past, my teammates and I had always gotten lucky and found a sympathetic coach. Now, I knew this practice was unsustainable. It would devastate me to see the other members of my dojang in my situation, unable to compete and losing hope as a result. My dojang needed a coach, and I decided it was up to me to find one.

I first approached the adults in the dojang – both instructors and members’ parents. However, these attempts only reacquainted me with polite refusals. Everyone I asked told me they couldn’t devote multiple weekends per year to competitions. I soon realized that I would have become the coach myself.

At first, the inner workings of tournaments were a mystery to me. To prepare myself for success as a coach, I spent the next year as an official and took coaching classes on the side. I learned everything from motivational strategies to technical, behind-the-scenes components of Taekwondo competitions. Though I emerged with new knowledge and confidence in my capabilities, others did not share this faith.

Parents threw me disbelieving looks when they learned that their children’s coach was only a child herself. My self-confidence was my armor, deflecting their surly glances. Every armor is penetrable, however, and as the relentless barrage of doubts pounded my resilience, it began to wear down. I grew unsure of my own abilities.

Despite the attack, I refused to give up. When I saw the shining eyes of the youngest students preparing for their first competition, I knew I couldn’t let them down. To quit would be to set them up to be barred from competing like I was. The knowledge that I could solve my dojang’s longtime problem motivated me to overcome my apprehension.

Now that my dojang flourishes at competitions, the attacks on me have weakened, but not ended. I may never win the approval of every parent; at times, I am still tormented by doubts, but I find solace in the fact that members of my dojang now only worry about competing to the best of their abilities.

Now, as I arrive at a tournament with my students, I close my eyes and remember the past. I visualize the frantic search for a coach and the chaos amongst my teammates as we competed with one another to find coaches before the staging calls for our respective divisions. I open my eyes to the exact opposite scene. Lacking a coach hurt my ability to compete, but I am proud to know that no member of my dojang will have to face that problem again.

This essay begins with an in-the-moment narrative that really illustrates the chaos of looking for a coach last-minute. We feel the writer’s emotions, particularly her dejectedness, at not being able to compete. Starting an essay in media res  is a great way to capture the attention of your readers and build anticipation for what comes next.

Through this essay, we can see how gutsy and determined the student is in deciding to become a coach themselves. She shows us these characteristics through their actions, rather than explicitly telling us: To prepare myself for success as a coach, I spent the next year as an official and took coaching classes on the side.  Also, by discussing the opposition she faced and how it affected her, the student is open and vulnerable about the reality of the situation.

The essay comes full circle as the author recalls the frantic situations in seeking out a coach, but this is no longer a concern for them and their team. Overall, this essay is extremely effective in painting this student as mature, bold, and compassionate.

The biggest thing this essay needs to work on is showing not telling. Throughout the essay, the student tells us that she “emerged with new knowledge and confidence,” she “grew unsure of her own abilities,” and she “refused to give up”. What we really want to know is what this looks like.

Instead of saying she “emerged with new knowledge and confidence” she should have shared how she taught a new move to a fellow team-member without hesitation. Rather than telling us she “grew unsure of her own abilities” she should have shown what that looked like by including her internal dialogue and rhetorical questions that ran through her mind. She could have demonstrated what “refusing to give up” looks like by explaining how she kept learning coaching techniques on her own, turned to a mentor for advice, or devised a plan to win over the trust of parents. 

Essay Example #9: Eritrea

No one knows where Eritrea is.

On the first day of school, for the past nine years, I would pensively stand in front of a class, a teacher, a stranger  waiting for the inevitable question: Where are you from?

I smile politely, my dimples accentuating my ambiguous features. “Eritrea,” I answer promptly and proudly. But I  am always prepared. Before their expression can deepen into confusion, ready to ask “where is that,” I elaborate,  perhaps with a fleeting hint of exasperation, “East Africa, near Ethiopia.”

Sometimes, I single out the key-shaped hermit nation on a map, stunning teachers who have “never had a student  from there!” Grinning, I resist the urge to remark, “You didn’t even know it existed until two minutes ago!”

Eritrea is to the East of Ethiopia, its arid coastline clutches the lucrative Red Sea. Battle scars litter the ancient  streets – the colonial Italian architecture lathered with bullet holes, the mosques mangled with mortar shells.  Originally part of the world’s first Christian kingdom, Eritrea passed through the hands of colonial Italy, Britain, and  Ethiopia for over a century, until a bloody thirty year war of Independence liberated us.

But these are facts that anyone can know with a quick Google search. These are facts that I have memorised and compounded, first from my Grandmother and now from pristine books  borrowed from the library.

No historical narrative, however, can adequately capture what Eritrea is.  No one knows the aroma of bushels of potatoes, tomatoes, and garlic – still covered in dirt – that leads you to the open-air market. No one knows the poignant scent of spices, arranged in orange piles reminiscent of compacted  dunes.  No one knows how to haggle stubborn herders for sheep and roosters for Christmas celebrations as deliberately as my mother. No one can replicate the perfect balance of spices in dorho and tsebhi as well as my grandmother,  her gnarly hands stirring the pot with ancient precision (chastising my clumsy knife work with the potatoes).  It’s impossible to learn when the injera is ready – the exact moment you have to lift the lid of the mogogo. Do it too  early (or too late) and the flatbread becomes mangled and gross. It is a sixth sense passed through matriarchal  lineages.

There are no sources that catalogue the scent of incense that wafts through the sunlit porch on St. Michael’s; no  films that can capture the luminescence of hundreds of flaming bonfires that fluoresce the sidewalks on Kudus  Yohannes, as excited children chant Ge’ez proverbs whose origin has been lost to time.  You cannot learn the familiarity of walking beneath the towering Gothic figure of the Enda Mariam Cathedral, the  crowds undulating to the ringing of the archaic bells.  I have memorized the sound of the rains hounding the metal roof during kiremti , the heat of the sun pounding  against the Toyota’s window as we sped down towards Ghinda , the opulent brilliance of the stars twinkling in a  sky untainted by light pollution, the scent of warm rolls of bani wafting through the streets at precisely 6 o’clock each day…

I fill my flimsy sketchbook with pictures from my memory. My hand remembers the shapes of the hibiscus drifting  in the wind, the outline of my grandmother (affectionately nicknamed a’abaye ) leaning over the garden, the bizarre architecture of the Fiat Tagliero .  I dice the vegetables with movements handed down from generations. My nose remembers the scent of frying garlic, the sourness of the warm tayta , the sharpness of the mit’mt’a …

This knowledge is intrinsic.  “I am Eritrean,” I repeat. “I am proud.”  Within me is an encyclopedia of history, culture, and idealism.

Eritrea is the coffee made from scratch, the spices drying in the sun, the priests and nuns. Eritrea is wise, filled with ambition, and unseen potential.  Eritrea isn’t a place, it’s an identity.

This is an exceptional essay that provides a window into this student’s culture that really makes their love for their country and heritage leap off the page. The sheer level of details and sensory descriptors this student is able to fit in this space makes the essay stand out. From the smells, to the traditions, sounds, and sights, the author encapsulates all the glory of Eritrea for the reader. 

The vivid images this student is able to create for the reader, whether it is having the tedious conversation with every teacher or cooking in their grandmother’s kitchen, transports us into the story and makes us feel like we are there in the moment with the student. This is a prime example of an essay that shows , not tells.

Besides the amazing imagery, the use of shorter paragraphs also contributes to how engaging this essay is. Employing this tactic helps break up the text to make it more readable and it isolates ideas so they stick out more than if they were enveloped in a large paragraph.

Overall, this is a really strong essay that brings to life this student’s heritage through its use of vivid imagery. This essay exemplifies what it means to show not tell in your writing, and it is a great example of how you can write an intimate personal statement without making yourself the primary focus of your essay. 

There is very little this essay should improve upon, but one thing the student might consider would be to inject more personal reflection into their response. Although we can clearly take away their deep love and passion for their homeland and culture, the essay would be a bit more personal if they included the emotions and feelings they associate with the various aspects of Eritrea. For example, the way their heart swells with pride when their grandmother praises their ability to cook a flatbread or the feeling of serenity when they hear the bells ring out from the cathedral. Including personal details as well as sensory ones would create a wonderful balance of imagery and reflection.

Essay Example #10: Journaling

Flipping past dozens of colorful entries in my journal, I arrive at the final blank sheet. I press my pen lightly to the page, barely scratching its surface to create a series of loops stringing together into sentences. Emotions spill out, and with their release, I feel lightness in my chest. The stream of thoughts slows as I reach the bottom of the page, and I gently close the cover of the worn book: another journal finished.

I add the journal to the stack of eleven books on my nightstand. Struck by the bittersweet sensation of closing a chapter of my life, I grab the notebook at the bottom of the pile to reminisce.

“I want to make a flying mushen to fly in space and your in it” – October 2008

Pulling back the cover of my first Tinkerbell-themed diary, the prompt “My Hopes and Dreams” captures my attention. Though “machine” is misspelled in my scribbled response, I see the beginnings of my past obsession with outer space. At the age of five, I tore through novels about the solar system, experimented with rockets built from plastic straws, and rented Space Shuttle films from Blockbuster to satisfy my curiosities. While I chased down answers to questions as limitless as the universe, I fell in love with learning. Eight journals later, the same relentless curiosity brought me to an airplane descending on San Francisco Bay.

“I wish I had infinite sunsets” – July 2019

I reach for the charcoal notepad near the top of the pile and open to the first page: my flight to the Stanford Pre-Collegiate Summer Institutes. While I was excited to explore bioengineering, anxiety twisted in my stomach as I imagined my destination, unsure of whether I could overcome my shyness and connect with others.

With each new conversation, the sweat on my palms became less noticeable, and I met students from 23 different countries. Many of the moments where I challenged myself socially revolved around the third story deck of the Jerry house. A strange medley of English, Arabic, and Mandarin filled the summer air as my friends and I gathered there every evening, and dialogues at sunset soon became moments of bliss. In our conversations about cultural differences, the possibility of an afterlife, and the plausibility of far-fetched conspiracy theories, I learned to voice my opinion. As I was introduced to different viewpoints, these moments challenged my understanding of the world around me. In my final entries from California, I find excitement to learn from others and increased confidence, a tool that would later allow me to impact my community.

“The beauty in a tower of cans” – June 2020

Returning my gaze to the stack of journals, I stretch to take the floral-patterned book sitting on top. I flip through, eventually finding the beginnings of the organization I created during the outbreak of COVID-19. Since then, Door-to-Door Deliveries has woven its way through my entries and into reality, allowing me to aid high-risk populations through free grocery delivery.

With the confidence I gained the summer before, I took action when seeing others in need rather than letting my shyness hold me back. I reached out to local churches and senior centers to spread word of our services and interacted with customers through our website and social media pages. To further expand our impact, we held two food drives, and I mustered the courage to ask for donations door-to-door. In a tower of canned donations, I saw the value of reaching out to help others and realized my own potential to impact the world around me.

I delicately close the journal in my hands, smiling softly as the memories reappear, one after another. Reaching under my bed, I pull out a fresh notebook and open to its first sheet. I lightly press my pen to the page, “And so begins the next chapter…”

The structuring of this essay makes it easy and enjoyable to read. The student effectively organizes their various life experiences around their tower of journals, which centers the reader and makes the different stories easy to follow. Additionally, the student engages quotes from their journals—and unique formatting of the quotes—to signal that they are moving in time and show us which memory we should follow them to.

Thematically, the student uses the idea of shyness to connect the different memories they draw out of their journals. As the student describes their experiences overcoming shyness at the Stanford Pre-Collegiate Summer Institutes and Door-to-Door Deliveries, this essay can be read as an Overcoming Obstacles essay.

At the end of this essay, readers are fully convinced that this student is dedicated (they have committed to journaling every day), thoughtful (journaling is a thoughtful process and, in the essay, the student reflects thoughtfully on the past), and motivated (they flew across the country for a summer program and started a business). These are definitely qualities admissions officers are looking for in applicants!

Although this essay is already exceptionally strong as it’s written, the first journal entry feels out of place compared to the other two entries that discuss the author’s shyness and determination. It works well for the essay to have an entry from when the student was younger to add some humor (with misspelled words) and nostalgia, but if the student had either connected the quote they chose to the idea of overcoming a fear present in the other two anecdotes or if they had picked a different quote all together related to their shyness, it would have made the entire essay feel more cohesive.

Where to Get Your Personal Statement Edited

Do you want feedback on your personal statement? After rereading your essays countless times, it can be difficult to evaluate your writing objectively. That’s why we created our free Peer Essay Review tool , where you can get a free review of your essay from another student. You can also improve your own writing skills by reviewing other students’ essays. 

If you want a college admissions expert to review your essay, advisors on CollegeVine have helped students refine their writing and submit successful applications to top schools. Find the right advisor for you to improve your chances of getting into your dream school!

Next Step: Supplemental Essays

Essay Guides for Each School

How to Write a Stellar Extracurricular Activity College Essay

4 Tips for Writing a Diversity College Essay

How to Write the “Why This College” Essay

Related CollegeVine Blog Posts

How to Masterfully Describe Your Personality in an Essay: A Step-by-Step Guide 2023

Introduction

Step 1: self-reflection and introspection, step 2: identifying core values and beliefs, step 3: gathering evidence and examples.

• Step 4: Show, don't tell

Step 5: Structuring your essay effectively

Step 6: balancing self-awareness and humility, step 7: seeking feedback and editing.

Describing your personality in an essay is not simply an exercise in self-expression; it is a transformative process that allows you to artfully communicate and convey the intricate nuances of your character to the reader. By delving into the depths of your self-awareness, personal growth, and the values that serve as the compass guiding your actions and decisions, you embark on a journey of self-discovery and introspection. In this comprehensive step-by-step guide , we will navigate the intricacies of crafting a compelling personality description in your essay, providing you with the necessary tools to masterfully articulate your unique qualities, experiences, and perspectives.

At its core, the act of describing your personality in an essay is an opportunity to authentically showcase who you are. It is a platform to illuminate the multifaceted nature of your being, unveiling the layers that make you distinct and individual. Through self-reflection and introspection , you delve into the recesses of your soul, gaining a deeper understanding of your own personality traits and characteristics. This process of self-exploration allows you to unearth the strengths that define you and the weaknesses that provide opportunities for growth.

Identifying your core values and beliefs is another essential step in effectively describing your personality. By exploring your fundamental principles and ideals, you gain insight into the motivations behind your actions and the driving force behind your decisions . These values serve as the undercurrent that weaves together the fabric of your personality, giving coherence and purpose to your thoughts and behaviors. Understanding how your personality traits align with your core values enables you to articulate a more comprehensive and authentic depiction of yourself.

To breathe life into your personality description, it is crucial to gather evidence and examples that showcase your traits in action. Recall specific instances where your personality has manifested itself, and examine the behaviors, thoughts, and emotions that were present. By drawing on these concrete examples, you provide tangible proof of your personality claims, allowing the reader to envision your character in vivid detail.

However, it is not enough to simply tell the reader about your personality traits; you must show them through vivid and descriptive language. By employing sensory details and evocative storytelling, you paint a vibrant picture that engages the reader’s imagination. It is through this artful depiction that your personality comes to life on the page, leaving a lasting impression.

Crafting an effective structure for your essay is also paramount to conveying your personality in a coherent and engaging manner. A well-structured essay captivates the reader from the outset with an engaging introduction that sets the tone and grabs their attention. Organizing your essay around key personality traits or themes creates a logical progression of ideas, enabling a seamless flow from one aspect of your personality to the next. This careful structuring enhances the readability and impact of your essay, allowing the reader to follow your journey of self-expression with ease.

In describing your personality, it is essential to strike a delicate balance between self-awareness and humility. While it is important to acknowledge your strengths and accomplishments, it is equally crucial to avoid sounding arrogant. Honesty about your weaknesse s and areas for growth demonstrates humility and a willingness to learn from experiences, fostering personal growth and development.

Also, seeking feedback and diligently editing your essay play a vital role in refining your personality description. Sharing your work with trusted individuals allows for constructive criticism, providing valuable insights into how effectively your personality is being portrayed. By carefully incorporating this feedback and paying attention to grammar, punctuation, and clarity, you can ensure that your essay is polished and ready to make a lasting impression . Below are the step by step guide on how to masterfully describe your personality in an essay

Before diving into writing, take the time to deeply understand your own personality traits and characteristics. Reflect on your strengths and weaknesses , considering how they have influenced your actions and interactions with others. Additionally, contemplate significant life experiences that have shaped your personality, providing valuable insights into who you are today.

Your core values and beliefs are the guiding principles that define your character. Explore what truly matters to you and the ideals that drive your decisions . By connecting your personality traits to these fundamental values, you create a more comprehensive understanding of yourself, providing a solid foundation for your essay.

To effectively describe your personality, draw upon specific instances where your traits were on display. Recall experiences that highlight your behavior, thoughts, and emotions. By utilizing concrete examples, you lend credibility to your claims about your personality, allowing the reader to envision your character in action.

Step 4: Show, don’t tell

Avoid falling into the trap of generic and vague descriptions. Instead, use vivid language and sensory details to bring your personality to life. Engage the reader’s imagination by painting a clear picture through storytelling. Let them experience your traits firsthand, making your essay more engaging and memorable.

Crafting a well-structured essay is crucial for conveying your personality in a coherent and engaging manner. Begin with an attention-grabbing introduction that captivates the reader’s interest. Organize your essay around key personality traits or themes, ensuring a logical progression of ideas. Maintain a smooth flow between paragraphs, enhancing the overall readability of your essay.

While it’s essential to highlight your strengths, be careful not to come across as arrogant. Emphasize your accomplishments and positive attributes without boasting. Simultaneously, be honest about your weaknesses and areas for growth , demonstrating humility and a willingness to learn from experiences. This balance showcases maturity and self-awareness.

Sharing your essay with trusted individuals can provide valuable perspectives and constructive criticism. Seek feedback from mentors, teachers, or friends who can offer insights into your essay’s strengths and areas that need improvement. Revise and refine your essay based on this feedback, paying close attention to grammar, punctuation, and clarity.

Incorporating these steps and techniques will allow you to masterfully describe your personality in an essay, capturing the essence of who you are in a compelling and authentic manner. Whether you are writing personality essays, an essay about personalities, or an essay on personality, the introduction of your personality essay should create a strong impression. It serves as a gateway for the reader to delve into your unique characteristics and perspectives. By effectively integrating these steps and maintaining a balanced approach, you can create a personality essay introduction that sets the stage for a captivating exploration of your individuality. So, how would you describe yourself? Use these guidelines and examples to express your personality with confidence and authenticity in your essay.

Mastering the art of describing your personality in an essay allows you to authentically express yourself and connect with readers on a deeper level. By embracing self-reflection and emphasizing personal growth, you create a c ompelling narrative that showcases your unique qualities. So, embark on this journey of self-expression and let your personality shine through your writing. Embrace authenticity, as it is through effective self-expression that personal growth and understanding can flourish.

If you’re looking for professional essay writing and editing services, GradeSmiths is here to help. With a team of experienced writers and editors, GradeSmiths offers reliable and high-quality assistance to students in need of essay support. Whether you need help with essay writing, editing, proofreading, or refining your content, GradeSmiths can provide the expertise you require. Their dedicated team is committed to delivering well-crafted essays that meet academic standards and showcase your unique ideas and voice. With GradeSmiths, you can trust that your essay will receive the attention and care it deserves.

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February 7, 2024

Proving Character Traits in Your Essays

When you write an application essay or statement of purpose , you’re trying to accomplish two equally vital goals at once. First, you need to establish your worthiness for acceptance at your target school. However, as part of that task, you need to show the adcom that you have the character traits that their program values. But how do you prove to people you have never met that you really are a person of good character, as well as smart, determined, focused, capable, and creative – without bragging ? 

What’s the secret? Show, don’t tell. 

You’ve heard this from writing instructors many times: “Show, don’t tell.” That’s the rule here, too. “Telling” makes boastful claims, such as “I was considered among the smartest in my department,” “I’m a team player,” and “I have the maturity of someone much older.” But when candidates make these statements without backing them up with real examples, they sound hollow.  

In contrast, “showing” illustrates the personal characteristics that you want to convey in a much more compelling way. By sharing selected experiences with the adcom that highlight your fantastic character and professional qualities, you’ll make a far more convincing case. 

Real stories do the job. 

In this essay example from a law school applicant, we see how the narrative he tells reveals his character:

Driving home from a busy day at work as general manager of our family’s signage and graphics company, I received a text message from the director of a local, small, post-collegiate Talmudic academy. The director was going out of town in a few days and asked me if I would give his class on the Talmud in his absence. The class is given every day at 6 a.m., before prayer, to a group of men dedicated to studying this body of Jewish civil and criminal law. At only 21 years old, I felt honored to be asked to stand in for a man of his stature. Studying and teaching the Talmud is one of my favorite activities, and I gladly accepted. Now, in less than 12 hours, I must be ready to teach the next day’s topic. I’d be up late preparing. 

Right out of the gate, we learn that this candidate manages a family business and was tapped to substitute teach a high-level class in the Talmud. These simple facts with no embellishment establish that his character traits include responsibility, reliability, and the ability to teach sophisticated legal concepts.  

In the next paragraph, he explains the relevance of this subject matter, suggesting a link between the study of ancient Jewish law and modern-day law: 

I spent many years poring over the Talmud. Though codified in the 7th century, its exacting, sometimes tedious arguments, legal theory, and decisions apply even in modern life. Jewish law applies to most facets and situations of our everyday lives. For example, there are laws, and nuances within laws, governing proper speech, business ethics, and obligations to honor parents, teachers, and elders.  

In the next paragraph, he connects the dots between his work in the family business and his aspirations in law. The attention to detail required in his job feels relevant to the practice of law and its endless details: 

I’ve learned many invaluable skills: project and time management, creative thinking, customer service, and leadership. I have had to develop extra attention to detail, particularly because of the customized nature of nearly all our jobs, and because one of my duties is to make sure we are in compliance with the very strict signage codes in Santa Monica as well as the City of Los Angeles. Additionally, I review the signage criteria and create a “permit package” for the city, after which we hope to obtain the permit without too much bureaucratic aggravation. 

He also discusses a part-time job he had at an employment law firm, which illustrates his commitment to readying himself for law school. This section builds from a strong foundation that has convincingly revealed his broad-based personal character traits, becoming tightly focused on how he has gained a basic orientation into the workings of a law practice: 

Because it is a small practice, I was able to speak directly with clients, send out personnel requests, and draft documents required before, during, and after litigation. Although I enjoyed learning about the various stages of the civil litigation process and had an excellent experience, I also learned that I don’t foresee myself practicing civil litigation. Instead, I hope to work as a regulatory and corporate compliance specialist in the context of commercial real estate and mergers and acquisitions.

The applicant concludes by explaining his particular interest in the law school to which he is applying, pointing to its outstanding reputation, large local alumni base, employment rate of more than 80% for the most recent graduating class, and emphasis on practical legal theory:

One civil litigation attorney I met – at a World Series party – told me (during a commercial break) that Loyola’s hands-on training and practical approach prepared him for his career better than he could have imagined, and he found a job within a week of graduating.

This essay effectively models our “show, don’t tell” advice. By the end of the essay, the reader cannot help but be impressed with the applicant’s personal character traits, which he has illustrated by providing examples, not simply making claims. 

Now let’s look at an equally strong essay, in which the candidate is asked to discuss a time when she was a team player . This is a valuable trait for just about any career, and especially important for aspiring MBAs. Good examples would be times when you came up with a creative compromise to a problem over which your coworkers/teammates were deadlocked, offered to take on additional responsibilities at work or on a school or club project when everyone else was overloaded, or asked your supervisor what you could do to add more value to your department. 

For this applicant, the challenge was even bigger, as we see at the opening (Note: This essay appears in MBA Admission for Smarties , by Linda Abraham and Judy Gruen, pages 93-94.):

I arrived in Chicago in the summer of 20__ as tech lead to revamp the website of a large chain of hotels. My company, Bright Zone (a pseudonym), was in an uncommon position as subcontractor to a management consultancy. I discovered that my coworkers’ morale had been falling for the past four months, a casualty of negative attitudes and the widely perceived incompetence of the previous firm that had been hired for the website overhaul, which had ended in disaster. I had been hired to direct development, but that was like putting out small brush fires when the whole forest was burning. I pursued team unification.

Right off the bat, we learn that this candidate has formidable tech abilities, having been asked to revamp a failed website overhaul. Second, her observations about low morale among her coworkers reveal her emotional intelligence and sensitivity.  

In the next paragraph, she starts proving her commitment to her team and to the success of this huge engagement. Notice the thought process that sparked her idea to invite the team out for social dinners after hours: 

I theorized that if people enjoyed being with each other socially, it would be harder to vilify each other at work. Over many dinners, the other techs under my supervision, as well as the consultants, seemed to begin to actually like each other and began trusting my recommendations.

Moving her story forward, she pinpoints the main perpetrator of the negativity. Barry is not only very senior to her but also her friend. Yet his severe antagonism toward the client forces her to overstep her normal boundaries, and she convinces her firm’s vice president and company chairman to take action:

My friendship with Barry complicated this dynamic, but I believed for my team to succeed, we had to purge toxicity. After two weeks of meetings and interventions, he was fired. With Barry’s negativity removed, my social activities began to have a dramatic impact. We became a true team, as the other consulting company now trusted us and gave us broad influence with the client. In moving beyond a tech lead’s responsibilities, I helped build a multimillion-dollar, strategic account.

Let’s recap the specifics the writer offers here: inviting team members for meals, talking privately with key players, and pushing to remove a toxic team member from the mix. These decisive actions all illustrate her maturity and her ability to assess the situation, take risks for the sake of the team, and earn her success on the other side. 

Actions matter!

Whether you want to reveal creativity, intelligence, dedication, commitment to social action, or anything else, make sure that you offer specific examples of times when you actively displayed the trait in question – rather than simply claiming in a vague and unconvincing manner that you possess it. Your actions will make the case for you.

Our consultants have many years of experience guiding applicants to admission with compelling, detailed, and story-filled essays. Are you ready to join the ranks of Accepted’s accepted clients? Explore our Admissions Consulting and Editing Services , and learn how we can help you create a winning application essay that highlights your greatest character traits, ones that will get you noticed and accepted at your top-choice program.

By Judy Gruen, former Accepted admissions consultant. Judy holds a master’s in journalism from Northwestern University. She is the co-author of Accepted’s first full-length book, MBA Admission for Smarties: The No-Nonsense Guide to Acceptance at Top Business Schools . Want an admissions expert to help you get accepted? Click here to get in touch!

Related Resources:

• How to Project Professionalism, Positivity, and Confidence in Your Statement of Purpose
• Three Ways Writing About Obstacles Strengthens Your Application Essays
• Five Fatal Flaws to Avoid in Your Grad School Statement of Purpose , a free guide

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What Is a Personal Essay (Personal Statement)?

Glossary of Grammatical and Rhetorical Terms

• An Introduction to Punctuation
• Ph.D., Rhetoric and English, University of Georgia
• M.A., Modern English and American Literature, University of Leicester
• B.A., English, State University of New York

A personal essay is a short work of autobiographical nonfiction characterized by a sense of intimacy and a conversational manner. Also called a personal statement . 

A type of creative nonfiction , the personal essay is "all over the map," according to Annie Dillard. "There's nothing you can't do with it. No subject matter is forbidden, no structure is prescribed. You get to make up your own form every time." ("To Fashion a Text," 1998) .

Examples of Personal Essays

• An Apology for Idlers , by Robert Louis Stevenson
• On Laziness , by Christopher Morley
• Coney Island at Night, by James Huneker
• New Year's Eve , by Charles Lamb
• How It Feels to Be Colored Me , by Zora Neale Hurston
• My Wood, by E.M. Forster
• Two Ways of Seeing a River , by Mark Twain
• What I Think and Feel at 25, by F. Scott Fitzgerald

Observations

• The personal essay is one of the most common types of writing assignment--and not only in freshman composition courses. Many employers, as well as graduate and professional schools, will ask you to submit a personal essay (sometimes called a personal statement ) before even considering you for an interview. Being able to compose a coherent version of yourself in words is clearly an important skill.
• What qualities does a personal essay reveal about you? Here are just a few:
• Communication Skills How effective are your communication skills? Do you write clearly, concisely, and correctly? Note that many employers put communication skills at the top of the list of essential qualifications.
• Critical Thinking Skills How fresh and imaginative are you in your thinking? Is your writing cluttered with cliches , or is it obvious that you have original ideas to contribute?
• Maturity What specific lessons have you learned from experience, and are you ready to apply those lessons to the job or the academic program you're considering? Keep in mind that it's not enough to be able to recount a personal experience; you should be prepared to interpret it as well.
• Self and Subject in Personal Essays "[W]here the familiar essay is characterized by its everyday subject matter, the personal essay is defined more by the personality of its writer, which takes precedence over the subject. On the other hand, the personal essayist does not place himself firmly in center stage, as does the autobiographical essayist; the autobiographical element of the personal essay is far less calculated..."
• The Essayist's Persona "Personal essayists from Montaigne on have been fascinated with the changeableness and plasticity of the materials of human personality. Starting with self-description, they have realized they can never render all at once the entire complexity of a personality. So they have elected to follow an additive strategy, offering incomplete shards, one mask or persona after another: the eager, skeptical, amiable, tender, curmudgeonly, antic, somber. If 'we must remove the mask,' it is only to substitute another mask..."
• The "Antigenre": An Alternative to Academic Prose "[T]he more personal essay offers an escape from the confines of academic prose . By using this antigenre form that in contemporary essays embodies multiple kinds of writing, many essayists in search of democracy find a freedom for expressing in their writings spontaneity, self-reflexivity, accessibility, and a rhetoric of sincerity."
• Teaching the Personal Essay "Given the opportunity to speak their own authority as writers, given a turn in the conversation, students can claim their stories as primary source material and transform their experiences into evidence ..."
• Essay Forms "Despite the anthologists' custom of presenting essays as 'models of organization ,' it is the loose structure or apparent shapelessness of the essay that is often stressed in standard definitions. . . . Samuel Johnson famously defined the essay as 'an irregular, indigested piece, not a regular and orderly performance.' And certainly, a number of essayists (Hazlitt and Emerson, for instance, after the fashion of Montaigne) are readily identifiable by the wayward or fragmentary nature of their explorations. Yet each of these writers observes certain distinctive organizing (or disorganizing) principles of his own, thus charting the ramble and shaping the form. As Jeanette Harris observes in Expressive Discourse , 'Even in the case of a personal essay , which may appear informal and loosely structured, the writer has crafted with care this very appearance of informality' (122).

Theresa Werner, "Personal Essay."  Encyclopedia of the Essay , ed. by Tracy Chevalier. Fitzroy Dearborn, 1997

E.B. White , Foreword to  Essays of E.B. White . Harper and Row, 1977

Cristina Kirklighter,  Traversing the Democratic Borders of the Essay . SUNY Press, 2002

Nancy Sommers, "Between the Drafts."  College Composition and Communication , February 1992

Richard F. Nordquist, "Voices of the Modern Essay." Dissertation University of Georgia, 1991

• What Are the Different Types and Characteristics of Essays?
• The Essay: History and Definition
• Compose a Narrative Essay or Personal Statement
• 6 Steps to Writing the Perfect Personal Essay
• Free Modifiers: Definition, Usage, and Examples
• What is a Familiar Essay in Composition?
• personal statement (essay)
• The Difference Between an Article and an Essay
• Biographies: The Stories of Humanity
• Genres in Literature
• Understanding Organization in Composition and Speech
• Tips for the Pre-2013 Personal Essay Options on the Common Application
• What Does "Persona" Mean?
• Definition and Examples of Formal Essays
• Point of View in Grammar and Composition
• What E.B. White Has to Say About Writing

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• The four main types of essay | Quick guide with examples

The Four Main Types of Essay | Quick Guide with Examples

Published on September 4, 2020 by Jack Caulfield . Revised on July 23, 2023.

An essay is a focused piece of writing designed to inform or persuade. There are many different types of essay, but they are often defined in four categories: argumentative, expository, narrative, and descriptive essays.

Argumentative and expository essays are focused on conveying information and making clear points, while narrative and descriptive essays are about exercising creativity and writing in an interesting way. At university level, argumentative essays are the most common type. 

In high school and college, you will also often have to write textual analysis essays, which test your skills in close reading and interpretation.

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Table of contents

Argumentative essays, expository essays, narrative essays, descriptive essays, textual analysis essays, other interesting articles, frequently asked questions about types of essays.

An argumentative essay presents an extended, evidence-based argument. It requires a strong thesis statement —a clearly defined stance on your topic. Your aim is to convince the reader of your thesis using evidence (such as quotations ) and analysis.

Argumentative essays test your ability to research and present your own position on a topic. This is the most common type of essay at college level—most papers you write will involve some kind of argumentation.

The essay is divided into an introduction, body, and conclusion:

• The introduction provides your topic and thesis statement
• The body presents your evidence and arguments
• The conclusion summarizes your argument and emphasizes its importance

The example below is a paragraph from the body of an argumentative essay about the effects of the internet on education. Mouse over it to learn more.

A common frustration for teachers is students’ use of Wikipedia as a source in their writing. Its prevalence among students is not exaggerated; a survey found that the vast majority of the students surveyed used Wikipedia (Head & Eisenberg, 2010). An article in The Guardian stresses a common objection to its use: “a reliance on Wikipedia can discourage students from engaging with genuine academic writing” (Coomer, 2013). Teachers are clearly not mistaken in viewing Wikipedia usage as ubiquitous among their students; but the claim that it discourages engagement with academic sources requires further investigation. This point is treated as self-evident by many teachers, but Wikipedia itself explicitly encourages students to look into other sources. Its articles often provide references to academic publications and include warning notes where citations are missing; the site’s own guidelines for research make clear that it should be used as a starting point, emphasizing that users should always “read the references and check whether they really do support what the article says” (“Wikipedia:Researching with Wikipedia,” 2020). Indeed, for many students, Wikipedia is their first encounter with the concepts of citation and referencing. The use of Wikipedia therefore has a positive side that merits deeper consideration than it often receives.

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An expository essay provides a clear, focused explanation of a topic. It doesn’t require an original argument, just a balanced and well-organized view of the topic.

Expository essays test your familiarity with a topic and your ability to organize and convey information. They are commonly assigned at high school or in exam questions at college level.

The introduction of an expository essay states your topic and provides some general background, the body presents the details, and the conclusion summarizes the information presented.

A typical body paragraph from an expository essay about the invention of the printing press is shown below. Mouse over it to learn more.

The invention of the printing press in 1440 changed this situation dramatically. Johannes Gutenberg, who had worked as a goldsmith, used his knowledge of metals in the design of the press. He made his type from an alloy of lead, tin, and antimony, whose durability allowed for the reliable production of high-quality books. This new technology allowed texts to be reproduced and disseminated on a much larger scale than was previously possible. The Gutenberg Bible appeared in the 1450s, and a large number of printing presses sprang up across the continent in the following decades. Gutenberg’s invention rapidly transformed cultural production in Europe; among other things, it would lead to the Protestant Reformation.

A narrative essay is one that tells a story. This is usually a story about a personal experience you had, but it may also be an imaginative exploration of something you have not experienced.

Narrative essays test your ability to build up a narrative in an engaging, well-structured way. They are much more personal and creative than other kinds of academic writing . Writing a personal statement for an application requires the same skills as a narrative essay.

A narrative essay isn’t strictly divided into introduction, body, and conclusion, but it should still begin by setting up the narrative and finish by expressing the point of the story—what you learned from your experience, or why it made an impression on you.

Mouse over the example below, a short narrative essay responding to the prompt “Write about an experience where you learned something about yourself,” to explore its structure.

Since elementary school, I have always favored subjects like science and math over the humanities. My instinct was always to think of these subjects as more solid and serious than classes like English. If there was no right answer, I thought, why bother? But recently I had an experience that taught me my academic interests are more flexible than I had thought: I took my first philosophy class.

Before I entered the classroom, I was skeptical. I waited outside with the other students and wondered what exactly philosophy would involve—I really had no idea. I imagined something pretty abstract: long, stilted conversations pondering the meaning of life. But what I got was something quite different.

A young man in jeans, Mr. Jones—“but you can call me Rob”—was far from the white-haired, buttoned-up old man I had half-expected. And rather than pulling us into pedantic arguments about obscure philosophical points, Rob engaged us on our level. To talk free will, we looked at our own choices. To talk ethics, we looked at dilemmas we had faced ourselves. By the end of class, I’d discovered that questions with no right answer can turn out to be the most interesting ones.

The experience has taught me to look at things a little more “philosophically”—and not just because it was a philosophy class! I learned that if I let go of my preconceptions, I can actually get a lot out of subjects I was previously dismissive of. The class taught me—in more ways than one—to look at things with an open mind.

A descriptive essay provides a detailed sensory description of something. Like narrative essays, they allow you to be more creative than most academic writing, but they are more tightly focused than narrative essays. You might describe a specific place or object, rather than telling a whole story.

Descriptive essays test your ability to use language creatively, making striking word choices to convey a memorable picture of what you’re describing.

A descriptive essay can be quite loosely structured, though it should usually begin by introducing the object of your description and end by drawing an overall picture of it. The important thing is to use careful word choices and figurative language to create an original description of your object.

Mouse over the example below, a response to the prompt “Describe a place you love to spend time in,” to learn more about descriptive essays.

On Sunday afternoons I like to spend my time in the garden behind my house. The garden is narrow but long, a corridor of green extending from the back of the house, and I sit on a lawn chair at the far end to read and relax. I am in my small peaceful paradise: the shade of the tree, the feel of the grass on my feet, the gentle activity of the fish in the pond beside me.

My cat crosses the garden nimbly and leaps onto the fence to survey it from above. From his perch he can watch over his little kingdom and keep an eye on the neighbours. He does this until the barking of next door’s dog scares him from his post and he bolts for the cat flap to govern from the safety of the kitchen.

With that, I am left alone with the fish, whose whole world is the pond by my feet. The fish explore the pond every day as if for the first time, prodding and inspecting every stone. I sometimes feel the same about sitting here in the garden; I know the place better than anyone, but whenever I return I still feel compelled to pay attention to all its details and novelties—a new bird perched in the tree, the growth of the grass, and the movement of the insects it shelters…

Sitting out in the garden, I feel serene. I feel at home. And yet I always feel there is more to discover. The bounds of my garden may be small, but there is a whole world contained within it, and it is one I will never get tired of inhabiting.

Though every essay type tests your writing skills, some essays also test your ability to read carefully and critically. In a textual analysis essay, you don’t just present information on a topic, but closely analyze a text to explain how it achieves certain effects.

Rhetorical analysis

A rhetorical analysis looks at a persuasive text (e.g. a speech, an essay, a political cartoon) in terms of the rhetorical devices it uses, and evaluates their effectiveness.

The goal is not to state whether you agree with the author’s argument but to look at how they have constructed it.

The introduction of a rhetorical analysis presents the text, some background information, and your thesis statement; the body comprises the analysis itself; and the conclusion wraps up your analysis of the text, emphasizing its relevance to broader concerns.

The example below is from a rhetorical analysis of Martin Luther King Jr.’s “I Have a Dream” speech . Mouse over it to learn more.

King’s speech is infused with prophetic language throughout. Even before the famous “dream” part of the speech, King’s language consistently strikes a prophetic tone. He refers to the Lincoln Memorial as a “hallowed spot” and speaks of rising “from the dark and desolate valley of segregation” to “make justice a reality for all of God’s children.” The assumption of this prophetic voice constitutes the text’s strongest ethical appeal; after linking himself with political figures like Lincoln and the Founding Fathers, King’s ethos adopts a distinctly religious tone, recalling Biblical prophets and preachers of change from across history. This adds significant force to his words; standing before an audience of hundreds of thousands, he states not just what the future should be, but what it will be: “The whirlwinds of revolt will continue to shake the foundations of our nation until the bright day of justice emerges.” This warning is almost apocalyptic in tone, though it concludes with the positive image of the “bright day of justice.” The power of King’s rhetoric thus stems not only from the pathos of his vision of a brighter future, but from the ethos of the prophetic voice he adopts in expressing this vision.

Literary analysis

A literary analysis essay presents a close reading of a work of literature—e.g. a poem or novel—to explore the choices made by the author and how they help to convey the text’s theme. It is not simply a book report or a review, but an in-depth interpretation of the text.

Literary analysis looks at things like setting, characters, themes, and figurative language. The goal is to closely analyze what the author conveys and how.

The introduction of a literary analysis essay presents the text and background, and provides your thesis statement; the body consists of close readings of the text with quotations and analysis in support of your argument; and the conclusion emphasizes what your approach tells us about the text.

Mouse over the example below, the introduction to a literary analysis essay on Frankenstein , to learn more.

Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein is often read as a crude cautionary tale about the dangers of scientific advancement unrestrained by ethical considerations. In this reading, protagonist Victor Frankenstein is a stable representation of the callous ambition of modern science throughout the novel. This essay, however, argues that far from providing a stable image of the character, Shelley uses shifting narrative perspectives to portray Frankenstein in an increasingly negative light as the novel goes on. While he initially appears to be a naive but sympathetic idealist, after the creature’s narrative Frankenstein begins to resemble—even in his own telling—the thoughtlessly cruel figure the creature represents him as. This essay begins by exploring the positive portrayal of Frankenstein in the first volume, then moves on to the creature’s perception of him, and finally discusses the third volume’s narrative shift toward viewing Frankenstein as the creature views him.

If you want to know more about AI tools , college essays , or fallacies make sure to check out some of our other articles with explanations and examples or go directly to our tools!

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At high school and in composition classes at university, you’ll often be told to write a specific type of essay , but you might also just be given prompts.

Look for keywords in these prompts that suggest a certain approach: The word “explain” suggests you should write an expository essay , while the word “describe” implies a descriptive essay . An argumentative essay might be prompted with the word “assess” or “argue.”

The vast majority of essays written at university are some sort of argumentative essay . Almost all academic writing involves building up an argument, though other types of essay might be assigned in composition classes.

Essays can present arguments about all kinds of different topics. For example:

• In a literary analysis essay, you might make an argument for a specific interpretation of a text
• In a history essay, you might present an argument for the importance of a particular event
• In a politics essay, you might argue for the validity of a certain political theory

An argumentative essay tends to be a longer essay involving independent research, and aims to make an original argument about a topic. Its thesis statement makes a contentious claim that must be supported in an objective, evidence-based way.

An expository essay also aims to be objective, but it doesn’t have to make an original argument. Rather, it aims to explain something (e.g., a process or idea) in a clear, concise way. Expository essays are often shorter assignments and rely less on research.

The key difference is that a narrative essay is designed to tell a complete story, while a descriptive essay is meant to convey an intense description of a particular place, object, or concept.

Narrative and descriptive essays both allow you to write more personally and creatively than other kinds of essays , and similar writing skills can apply to both.

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9 Essential Features of the Personal Essay Format

Kate Sliunkova

AdmitYogi, Stanford MBA & MA in Education

1. Writing Quality

‍Because personal essays hold a mirror up to the author and are also compositions, they allow for and demand some elements of originality and creativity.

The key is to craft an essay that is uniquely yours, impactful, succinct, and authentic. You’ll want to make every word count, strive to “show not tell,” and excel at improving word choice during the revision process to give full expression to your experiences and insights.

You, and someone not you (with good written communication skills), should review for final editing and to ensure the essay is carefully proofread.

2. Personal Point of View and Voice

‍Unlike expository essays or news writing, personal essays are subjective, and use first-person speech and perspective. Everything in the essay projects your unique personality, emotions, imunication style, making your college essay both “personal” and distinctive.

3. Authenticity and Vulnerability

Personal essays often explore sensitive or vulnerable topics, allowing readers to connect with YOU, the speaker. At the same time you’ll want to leave out overly personal or private details that don’t really fit the purpose or goal of the essay! Your essay is personal but it’s also shared publicly. You present an authentic self, without coming across boastful or artificial, and without being overly familiar…

PRO TIP: Respect your boundaries when it comes to what you feel okay sharing or not sharing. > Get input from an outside reader who knows you well for more input on what you’re sharing about > yourself and your life experiences before you press “submit.”

4. An Individual Value System

‍A great GPA and great letters of recommendation carry weight, but your personal essay is a way to present consequential character traits admissions officers are unlikely to find elsewhere in your application packet. A strong essay will communicate your values AND anchor them in lived experiences and reflections — making these personal beliefs more vivid, memorable, and also persuasive. Finally, look for opportunities to share how your values inform your passion for learning, your vocational interests, and your potential to contribute positively to campus life.

‍Personal essays aren’t just lists of experiences or lists of personality traits…Personal essays are a great format for highlighting your own level of self awareness. In an essay this often involves showing pivotal experiences or influences in your life and how you actively learn from them. Don’t feel valuable experiences need to be exceptional or fit any mold, we all learn from big and small experiences in our lives, and both successes and challenges can offer equally valuable insights!

6. Storytelling

‍Some personal essays are structured as narratives or “stories.” In fact, sometimes personal essay and personal narrative are terms used to describe the same essay format. We’ll talk more about narrative elements under “structure” below.

7. Emotional Connection‍

Successful personal essays evoke emotions in the reader. They use concrete details, imagery, or emphatic language to help the reader connect on a more personal and intimate level with the writer’s individual circumstances, experiences, joys, hardships, or challenges…

8. Universality

‍Although subjective, the personal essay is a format that lets the writer share personal insights and reflections that touch on more universal themes about life. These larger themes make the piece more memorable for the reader and allow the reader to compare their own insights and experiences with those of the writer.

Personal essays, and admissions essays in particular, are usually concise and to the point. Although you’ll likely want to add color and realism with some descriptive details, dialogue, or other vivid elements, you’ll typically want to maintain a strong focus on your formative experiences and most meaningful reflections.

Since the College Admissions essay is part of the Personal Essay family, the principles we’ve just listed go a long way in helping you understand how to format a winning college essay!

PRO TIP: When you’re ready for some additional feedback on your essay try checking with an academic advisor at your school. It is also very helpful to seek feedback from someone who knows you well - a parent, sibling, or friend would do great, even better if they have recently gone through the admissions process themselves.

Get ahead of the pack by using more sophisticated AI tools designed specifically for evaluating college application essays, such as Admit Yogi AI Essay Reviewer . Our essay reviewer is designed specifically for college admissions essays with input from experienced admissions consultants and former admissions officers, offers prompts in an intuitive format, and is keyed to read for high-impact essay components such as writing quality, personal voice, authenticity, values, and insights…

Now that you’ve got some quick insights into the essential features of a powerful personal essay, let’s go on to talk about the kinds of content, themes, and structures that work best in a college essay format.

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How to write the tmdsas personal characteristics essay.

Reviewed by:

Jonathan Preminger

Former Admissions Committee Member, Hofstra-Northwell School of Medicine

Reviewed: 6/23/23

Applying through the TMDSAS? Read on to learn more about personal characteristics essays for TMDSAS schools! 

If you’re preparing to apply to medical school, you’re probably familiar with AMCAS . However, if you’re planning to apply to medical, dental, or veterinary school in Texas, you’ll need to apply using the Texas Medical & Dental Schools Application Service (TMDSAS) .

On top of your personal statement, you’ll need to write a personal characteristics essay. We’ll highlight everything you need to know about the TMDSAS personal characteristics essay and how to craft a narrative that maximizes your chances of getting accepted into your dream Texas medical school .

Get The Ultimate Guide on Writing an Unforgettable Personal Statement

Purpose of the TMDSAS ‍

Texas is a large and populous state; the purpose of the TMDSAS is to provide a centralized application service for Texas-only medical, dental, and veterinary schools. 

In fact, the TMDSAS pre-dates the AMCAS! The following medical schools participate in the TMDSAS network:

• The Baylor College of Medicine
• The Long School of Medicine at UT Health San Antonio
• The McGovern Medical School at UT Health Houston
• The Sam Houston State University College of Osteopathic Medicine
• The Texas A&M College of Medicine
• The Texas Tech University Health Sciences Center Paul L. Foster School of Medicine at El Paso
• The Texas Tech University Health Science Center School of Medicine at Lubbock
• The University of Houston College of Medicine
• The University of North Texas Health Science Center Texas College of Osteopathic Medicine
• The University of Texas at Austin Dell Medical School
• The University of Texas Medical Branch at Galveston
• The University of Texas Rio Grande Valley School of Medicine
• The University of Texas Southwestern Medical School

Two Texas medical schools don’t participate in the TMDSAS:

• The TCU and UNTHSC School of Medicine requires applicants to use the AMCAS .
• The University of the Incarnate Word School of Osteopathic Medicine requires applicants to use AACOMAS . 

Be sure to stay up-to-date with Texas medical school application procedures and visit the school websites to use the correct application portal.

TMDSAS Essay Overview ‍

Like AMCAS , the TMDSAS also requires a personal statement. The TMDSAS requires a personal characteristics essay and allows candidates to write an additional optional essay. 

The personal characteristics essay is unique to TMDSAS, so let’s highlight some key information, such as its purpose, tips on how to write a compelling narrative, and sample personal characteristics essays that thoroughly answer the prompt.

Purpose of the TMDSAS Personal Characteristics Essay

The TMDSAS personal characteristics essay must be 2,500 characters or fewer (including spaces). Applicants must respond to the following prompt:

“Learning from others is enhanced in educational settings that include individuals from diverse backgrounds and experiences. Please describe your personal characteristics (background, talents, skills, etc.) or experiences that would add to the educational experience of others.”

The way this prompt is worded might sound confusing and challenging, but we can simplify it – you can think of this as a diversity essay . Diversity has different contexts for this prompt. These may include your: 

• Unique background (ethnic, racial, socioeconomic, etc.) 
• Perspectives
• Ideas, talents, or skills
• Experiences
• Critical thinking

A strong personal characteristics essay connects your diverse background to medical school and illustrates how your peers, program, and the medical school can benefit from your diversity. 

Every entering class consists of diverse students with differing cultures, upbringings, socioeconomic statuses, birthplaces, educational experiences, and more. A diverse student body can expose students to new perspectives, insights, and information. 

This student body can challenge one another to grow, empathize with others, and foster a global mindset that is open, accepting, and critical in medicine. This is the heart of the personal characteristics essay, and what medical schools are looking for in future leaders – how will you add diversity and value to the class? 

How to Write the TMDSAS Personal Characteristics Essay

The TMDSAS personal characteristics essay is only 2,500 characters, including spaces, so every word must count. Here are tips for writing a strong and compelling personal characteristics essay:

1. Brainstorm Ideas That Demonstrate Your Diversity

Brainstorming is an effective technique to recall memories and experiences you can write about. You aren’t editing or revising your thoughts; don’t worry about grammar, structure, or spelling at this stage. 

You simply want to write down every idea that comes to you that may be relevant to your narrative. Here’s a list of questions to get started with thinking about diversity:

• Who are you at your core, and what experience(s) defined you?
• How do you identify yourself?
• Where did you grow up, and what was it like to live there?
• What was your family like?
• What have you done or experienced that shaped who you are today?
• Have you traveled abroad?
• Have you learned another language?
• Did you serve in the military?
• Have you volunteered in your community?
• Are you a part of any teams, groups, or organizations?
• Have you suffered or had to overcome disability, injury, or illness?
• Have you been a caregiver for someone with a disability or illness?
• Have you had to face and overcome rejection?
• Have you been bullied? How did you overcome it?

2. Pick Your Most Meaningful Anecdotes

After brainstorming, pick one to three stories that fulfill the prompt and are meaningful in your pursuit of medicine. Remember, you don’t want to choose similar experiences to those outlined in your personal statement! 

3. Outline the Structure of Your Essay

Create an outline to structure and organize your essay. Although the personal characteristics essay is relatively short, you want your narrative to flow. 

The essay should have an introduction, a body, and a conclusion:

4. Write Your First Draft 

After completing your outline, begin writing your first draft. Your tone should be professional yet conversational – you don’t want to be too stiff or casual.

It’s important to show rather than tell; instead of writing “I am compassionate,” tell a story that conveys your compassion. Remember, your first draft doesn’t have to be perfect, and it may even exceed the word limit the first time – changes can be made in the next step. 

5. Edit Your Work 

Review your first draft for spelling, grammar, clarity, and sentence structure errors. If there are weak sentences, cross them out and rewrite them. You can also check for concision – does every word serve a purpose? Eliminate wordy phrases to leave more room for rich descriptions. 

The introduction should flow seamlessly to the body and the body to the conclusion. Another pair of eyes can help provide a fresh perspective on your work – consider an admissions counselor’s help to ensure your writing aligns with what Texan med schools seek! 

TMDSAS Personal Characteristics Essay Examples

Here are some personal characteristics essay samples to help inspire you as you write your own drafts:

TMDSAS Essay Example #1 

Here’s the first TMDSAS essay example: 

“Being South Asian, I have firsthand knowledge of what it means not to access basic healthcare. As a child, my mother took me to Pakistan every year, where I spent summers with my grandfather, a top pediatrician in the nation. He had a free clinic attached to his home in Faisalabad, and his practice was so renowned and respected that people from all over the country would travel great distances to have my grandfather treat their children.  Pakistan is a developing country where a significant part of the population remains illiterate and uneducated due to the lack of resources and opportunities. This population is the most vulnerable, with extremely high numbers of infectious disease and mortality rates. Yet, it is entirely underserved. With the lack of hospitals, clinics, and doctor’s offices in rural Pakistan, parents of ailing children must travel great distances and wait in long lines to receive proper healthcare.  Every summer at my grandfather’s clinic, from ages five to seventeen, my job was to open the doors to long lines of tired, hungry, and thirsty parents with their sick children. I would pass out bottled water and pieces of fruit. I would record names, where the patients came from, and reasons for their visit. I would scurry back inside with the information for my grandfather to assess, and then he’d send me running back out again to let the next family inside. I learned in my formative years how to communicate with diverse patient populations with special needs and lack of basic necessities. I learned to listen to every family’s unique reasons for their visit, and some of their desperation and pleading for the lives of their children will stay with me forever. When I get into medical school, I hope to share the story of how Gulzarah carried her dehydrated daughter for twelve miles in the Pakistani summer heat without rest (thanks to my grandfather, she later made a full recovery). I want to tell my peers that doctors like my grandfather are not only healers in biology but healers in spirit when he made up heroic songs for the children and sang the fear out of their hearts. I want to show my peers that patients are unique individuals who have suffered and sacrificed to trust us with their healthcare, so we must honor their trust by providing quality treatment and empathy. My formative experiences in pediatrics contributed to my globally conscious mindset, and I look forward to sharing these diverse insights in my medical career.”  This essay connects the writer’s ethnic background and experiences interacting with underserved patients.  The communication skills they learned, their experiences with diverse individuals, and the stories patients shared with them will allow them to add diversity to the incoming class while sharing new insights and perspectives with their peers.  

TMDSAS Essay Example #2

This diversity essay example was adapted from a personal statement but still checks the boxes to showcase the author’s experiences and interests:

“Hatha yoga emphasizes the ability to sculpt the human form into a fit, healthy, balanced vehicle for self-awareness and discovery…My instructor, John, encouraged me to push myself further until full splits and headstands could be achieved with ease. Yoga therapy and instruction became a way for me to connect to people in many aspects of my life…  I cherish the diversity I encounter. It is what excites and motivates me. My study of yoga grew from my interest in exploring the philosophies of Eastern cultures. Traveling, mostly independently, to over 20 countries and living in Germany challenged me to continuously learn more about the diverse world around me. Ordinary tasks such as getting water and preparing food can become unique challenges as different modes of operation and cultural differences come into play. Incorporating “sanuk,” the Thai description for playful contentment, became a key tool for overcoming the obstacles of traveling alone in Asia.  Living abroad afforded me the opportunity to learn a language in a shorter time than studying in an English-speaking environment. Having studied Spanish and German encouraged me to be precise in the messages I want to convey. As I continue to travel, I am touched by the sincere desire and efforts of people to improve their English speaking skills. This invigorated my desire, and I find myself jumping at the opportunity to practice my language skills. These experiences will be valuable resources in establishing trust and building thoughtful communication with patients… Since college, I have been committed to volunteer work as a means of improving social conditions and quality of life. As a therapist, I offered massages and yoga instruction to low-income individuals in exchange for donations to Habit for Humanity and Doctors Without Borders. I was able to raise hundreds of dollars for these organizations while providing massages to people who would ordinarily not be able to afford such services. …Observing work done in hospitals in India provided an insight into the ways in which I can incorporate a desire to work in underserved communities into my career as a physician… Though the path I have chosen may be arduous at times, my practice of yoga, meditation, and mindfulness will help keep my own physical and emotional health in balance. It is this integrated balance, along with a sincere desire to help people, that I have to share with my community and the medical profession.”  This diversity essay showcases the writer’s passion for yoga and how their pursuit of new experiences in new places invigorates them. While they connect their travels and other experiences to how it will help them become a better doctor, they could have been more direct about what they could teach their peers. 

TMDSAS Essay Example #3  

Here’s another TMDSAS personal characteristics essay sample : 

“I grew up in a household of six, and I am the youngest of four siblings, with two older brothers and one older sister. I spent the first eighteen years of my life living in Cedar Hill, a suburb of Dallas with a population of 50,000 and around 50% of that being Black. All of my siblings played sports, and everyone was very competitive, but in a good way…It was more about doing better than your previous best than being the other person. This was especially true after I became a swimmer in higher school. Before every race, my swim coaches always made sure to tell me that it was me against the clock, not against the people who were swimming around me. It instilled in me a very internally motivated hard work ethic. I want to improve myself because I know that my full potential has not been reached, not because other people are doing better. As a medical student, this will only make me a better doctor, as I will always be striving to become a better caregiver than I was before, whether that means learning more about the body and disease or learning how to become more compassionate so that I can serve my patients to the best of my ability. But hard work is not all that is necessary for success.  My life has been heavily affected by my Blackness. My dad used to give me lessons on what to do if I were stopped by the police. He said that because of the color of my skin, I would have to be as subservient as possible that there was less of a chance of my name becoming another hashtag. When I walked to school, I saw confederate flags flying on people’s houses. I was told, “You’re so lucky you’re black,” referring the the advantage in college admissions people thought I received because of my race, disregarding the struggles that come with growing up black, including the criminalization of Black people. The same criminalization that has a very negative impact on Black people, causing us to see things such as the color of our skin as negative…But because I had such a strong support system and grew up in a family full of Black role models, I did not see my Blackness as a detriment, but something to be celebrated.  It is important and uplifting to see people who look like you as successful. It is even more important that you have a connection with these people, and my Blackness taught me the value of mentorship. If I had not had powerful Black people pouring into me, things would be a lot different. Because mentorship influenced me so much, I became a mentor while at Vanderbilt, leading mentorship organizations such as Project I Am and After School Program. I want to continue to be a mentor and role model as I pursue my career as a doctor, being a positive example for aspiring Black doctors and communities of color in general. Yes, hard work is necessary to succeed, and you will accomplish much by being hard-working, but you need mentors and role models. Everyone needs someone to look up to who will guide, encourage and care for them.”  This essay showcases various aspects of the writer’s background, interests, and insights. They’ve seamlessly tied their home upbringing, racial identity, perspectives on competition, and appreciation for mentorship.  They clearly reference how they want to be a mentor and role model for other doctors who are Black or POC. 

Still have questions about the TMDSAS’ personal characteristics essay? Then check out these FAQs! 

1. What Does Diversity Mean in the TMDSAS Personal Characteristics Essay? 

For the TMDSAS essay, diversity doesn’t only mean racial, ethnic, socioeconomic, or gender diversity. You can broaden the definition and think of any unique event or experience that’s meaningful and shows how your acceptance would benefit your peers.

2. What’s the Difference Between the TMDSAS Personal Statement and Personal Characteristics Essay?

The personal statement addresses why you’re the right candidate for med school. The personal characteristics essay focuses on your diversity and the insights you can bring to the class to educate your peers and add value to the program.

3. What Do I Write About In My Personal Characteristics Essay? 

Ideally, one to three events or experiences are sufficient to answer the prompt. It’s better to have quality over quantity. The essay should be clear, well-organized, and professional. It’s easier to achieve a compelling, coherent essay by focusing on a couple of key ideas.

4. What Should I Avoid in My Personal Characteristics Essay?

Some things to avoid in your TMDSAS essay include rehashing your resume, writing controversial or alienating statements, being overly negative or critical, not editing, using filler words, and lying or embellishing. 

5. What Is the Character Limit of the TMDSAS Essays?

The TMDSAS personal statement is 5,000 characters (including spaces). The TMDSAS personal characteristics essay is 2,500 characters (including spaces). 

Final Thoughts 

The personal characteristics essay is a required TMDSAS component that shares your diversity and how it would enhance the entering class. With our guide, you’re well on your way to crafting a successful TMDSAS personal characteristics essay that showcases your diversity, fit, background, and experiences! 

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• Medical School Application

Your Guide To Writing A Great TMDSAS Personal Characteristics Essay

Featured Expert: Dr. Vincent Athanas, MD

The  TMDSAS  application system has several unique essay components, including the TMDSAS personal characteristics essay. While most students understand the meaning behind  TMDSAS personal statement , many of them find writing the TMDSAS personal characteristics essay more challenging. We are here to show you how to write an outstanding TMDSAS personal characteristics essay and provide examples that inspire you to write your own!

>> Want us to help you get accepted? Schedule a free strategy call here . <<

Listen to the blog!

Article Contents 5 min read

What is the tmdsas personal characteristics essay.

The TMDSAS Personal Characteristics Essay is a required component of the Texas Medical and Dental Schools Application Service (TMDSAS) that asks applicants to describe personal characteristics and experiences that will contribute to the diversity and educational benefits of the student body.

This essay provides an opportunity for applicants to highlight unique aspects of their background, experiences, and personal qualities that align with the values of the healthcare profession. In 2500 characters or less, including spaces, students must respond to the following prompt:

Learning from others is enhanced in educational settings that include individuals from diverse backgrounds and experiences. Please describe your personal characteristics (background, talents, skills, etc.) or experiences that would add to the educational experience of others. ","label":"TMDSAS Personal Characteristics Essay Prompt","title":"TMDSAS Personal Characteristics Essay Prompt"}]" code="tab1" template="BlogArticle">

Would You Like Our Help With Your TMDSAS Application? ","buttonText":"free strategy call","buttonColor":"#ffffff","addTrustpilot":"false","bannerUnderText":" Limited Spots Available ","belowButtonText1":null,"belowButtonText2":null,"trustpilot":false}" :url=""https:\/\/bemoacademicconsulting.com\/contact-schedule-free-strategy-call"" code="banner1" background-color="#000066" button-color="#ffffff" banner-image> Decoding the prompt and figuring out how to answer it appropriately can be challenging; so don’t stress if you aren’t sure where to start. We’re going to help you better understand the purpose of this essay. In fact, work with students on components of various applications (including TMDSAS ones) every single day; it’s what we do best! “Danielle Payne was so, so helpful during my brainstorming session for my TMDSAS essay. Before the session, I had been struggling to come up with ideas for the essay and had re-written it multiple times. However, now I feel confident with my first new draft!” – Anonymous, Former BeMo Student

Before we get into the details of this essay, we want to encourage you think of the task as one to emphasize your own diverse experiences and uniqueness. The admissions committee wants to know what form of diversity you can bring to your medical class that will benefit your peers.

Picture a class of 100 medical students who all grew up in the same city, and came from certain economic and personal backgrounds…this class would be sorely lacking in diverse and unique perspectives. Students coming from different cultural, ethnic, religious, or other backgrounds bring with them captivating and invaluable perspectives that will only help them, and those they interact with, in the medical field.

In this essay, it's your responsibility to demonstrate how you are unique as a candidate and how you can enrich other students in your class based on your own personal experiences in life. As one of our former students, Alison, a non-traditional applicant stated:

“It’s important to provide honest insights into your journey, challenges, and the lessons learned along the way”. By reflecting on my experiences and articulating how they have shaped my aspirations in medicine, I aimed to present herself as a thoughtful and introspective candidate.” – Alison Edwards, Former BeMo Student, Dell Medical School

The following  medical schools in Texas , both  MD and DO , as well as Dental schools in Texas and Vet schools, participate in the TMDSAS  medical school application  service and therefore require the submission of a personal characteristics essay. Take note of the  medical school GPA requirements  to help you decide which schools are ideal for you to apply to.

TMDSAS MD Schools

• Texas A&M University School of Medicine
• Baylor College of Medicine
• McGovern Medical School at the University of Texas Health Science Center at Houston
• Long School of Medicine at UT Health San Antonio
• Texas Tech University Health Sciences Center Paul L. Foster School of Medicine at El Paso
• Texas Tech University Health Science Center School of Medicine at Lubbock
• Tilman J. Fertitta Family College of Medicine at University of Houston
• John Sealy School of Medicine at the University of Texas Medical Branch at Galveston
• The University of Texas Rio Grande Valley School of Medicine
• The University of Texas Southwestern Medical Center
• The University of Texas at Tyler School of Medicine
• The University of Texas at Austin Dell Medical School

The DO school rankings below contain schools that also participate in the TMDSAS service. However, keep in mind that many other osteopathic schools use the traditional DO school application , the AACOMAS, so be sure to verify which system you need to use beforehand.

• Sam Houston State University College of Osteopathic Medicine
• University of North Texas Health Science Center Texas College of Osteopathic Medicine

TMDSAS Veterinary Schools

Check out the following best vet schools  that participate in the TMDSAS application service. If you’re considering applying to some of these schools, make sure to check out their veterinary school acceptance rates .

• Texas A&M University College of Veterinary Medicine
• Texas Tech University School of Veterinary Medicine

TMDSAS Dental Schools

And finally, check out  dental school acceptance rates among the schools that use the TMDSAS application service.

• Texas Tech University Woody L. Hunt School of Dental Medicine
• The University of Texas Health San Antonio School of Dentistry
• The University of Texas Health School of Dentistry at Houston

Applying through TMDSAS? Watch this video to learn more!

How Can I Demonstrate Diversity in My TMDSAS Personal Characteristics Essay?

It’s common for students to feel as though they don’t bring any diverse qualities to the table, and thus, struggle with this essay. They may think that because they are not from a traditional “category of diversity” such as race, economic class, gender identity, sexual orientation, religion, culture, language, immigration and disability, that they have nothing worth discussing. This couldn't be further from the truth and has to do with a misunderstanding of the meaning behind the word.

In the case of the TMDSAS personal characteristics essay, ‘diversity’ is broadly defined to encompass a wide range of personal experiences, backgrounds, and unique attributes that an applicant brings to the medical field. This includes, but is not limited to, cultural, socioeconomic, educational diversity, life experiences, and personal challenges overcome, which contribute to a richer, more diverse medical community.

If you feel you need assistance with crafting your diversity story for your characteristics essay, our academic advisors can help:

“Ashley was really helpful in finding ways for me to think about my experiences and how they might be incorporated into my diversity essays. I struggled writing those essays and left them for last because I was lost on how to start them, let alone what to write about.” – Anonymous, Former BeMo Student

Our former student Alison reflected on her unique experience with the AMCAS and TMDSAS essays. She understands the important of students drawing from their life experiences to showcase well-roundedness and abilities to contribute to the medical school community:

“It’s important to present diverse set of experiences in applications, not only those directly related to medicine. I was a music major and athlete. This approach helped to paint a more complete picture of who I was as a person. I also used [my third essay] to talk about an academic dishonesty incident, focusing not on excuses, but on what I learned from the experience and how it's going to make me a better physician."- Alison Edwards, Former BeMo Student, Dell Medical School

What's your story? Here're some questions for you to consider when you prepare your TMDSAS personal characteristics essay:

As previously mentioned, every student has something to contribute, you don't have to have climbed Mount Everest or traveled overseas for your experience to be worthwhile. Experiences don't have to be exotic or require travel, you just have to connect back to how that experience influenced you in your journey to become a physician.

You have problem heard the saying, \u2018show, don\u2019t tell\u2019 when it comes to writing essays. This is crucial. Make sure you use concrete examples and describe why you are more resilient, introspective, empathetic (or whatever qualities you decide to discuss) today. Listing items holds no value and isn't believable. Everyone can list an item, but not everyone can support their discussion through personal examples. ","label":"Show, don't tell","title":"Show, don't tell"}]" code="tab2" template="BlogArticle">

TMDSAS Medical School Application Timeline

Refer to the following important dates for you to navigate the application in a timely fashion:

Medical applicants must decide which program to accept "}]">

The personal characteristics essay is one of the required components of your TMDSAS application. Simply put, you can regard this essay’s prompt as a diversity prompt. You must demonstrate what new perspectives, knowledge, or skills you can contribute to the incoming medical class. Note that the term diversity is meant very broadly here. 

While you can write about traditional categories of diversity such as race, ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation, or immigration status, you are also encouraged to get creative with what you include in your essay. Every single person on the planet has unique experiences and events that shaped who they are – dig deep and brainstorm distinctive narratives that you can include in your personal characteristics essay.

As I already mentioned, you must get creative with your essay. Just because you have lived in the same town or city your entire life or never swam across Lake Ontario does not mean that you do not have a unique story to tell. There is no need to fabricate events or experiences, believe me. Ask yourself the following: 

• Have you ever faced a challenge? How did it shape your character? What did you do to overcome it? 
• Have you ever met a person whose worldview was completely different from yours? What did you learn? How did this impact you?
• What do you do in your free time? Do you have a passion outside of medicine? Do you play music, sports, or create art? 
• Reflect on your family circumstances and how they shaped you and your desire to become a physician. 

I can go on and on, but the point here is that your story is unique – share it with the admissions committee.

While the personal statement asks why you are the right candidate for medical school, the personal characteristics essay asks you to demonstrate your unique experiences and skills that can broaden the perspectives of your future medical school peers, and the optional essay is your chance to discuss any experiences or events that are relevant to your application which you have not previously discussed. I know it may be frustrating to prepare so many primary essays for your application, but all your essays must be of the highest quality – do not think the personal characteristics essay is any less important than the personal essay. 

Remember, the prompts are all different. To succeed, you must answer the prompt of the essay you are writing, whether it’s the personal statement, personal characteristics essay, optional essay, or the  medical school secondary essays . 

I strongly advise you to stick to 1-3 experiences or events. Remember, you must show rather than tell your story. Include concrete examples, describe your feelings and mental state, explain how certain experiences or events shaped you. Do not simply say, for example, “I served in the military. It was challenging.” – give the reader a vivid image of you in the military and how it shaped your character. What can your peers in medical school learn from you and your experience? Sticking to 1-3 experiences will allow you to speak of them in detail.

TMDSAS limits your personal characteristics essay to 2500 characters including spaces.

The composition of your personal characteristics essay will follow the academic essay structure: introduction, body, and conclusion. While this essay will be shorter than the personal statement, nevertheless, it must be well organized, clean, and easy to follow. 

Unfortunately, you can’t change your essay after you submit it. The only items in your application that you can change after you submit your application include the following: contact information, colleges attended, college coursework, terms attended, planned enrollment, My Account, and Test Scores.

While this application component is absolutely essential, it is not the sole reason for your acceptance or medical school rejection . You will need to have other strong elements, including transcripts, evaluators, and standardized test scores.

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Morning Rundown: Israeli War Cabinet meets about Iran response, Trump's first criminal trial set to get underway, and 'Rust' armorer called jury 'idiots' after conviction

Trump and Mike Johnson zero in on noncitizen voting. It’s already illegal and very rare.

Former President Donald Trump and House Speaker Mike Johnson pitched new legislation to crack down on noncitizen voting on Friday, despite the fact the practice is already illegal and occurs rarely.

Johnson said House Republicans would introduce a bill to require documentary proof of citizenship to register to vote, speaking at Mar-a-Lago next to Trump as he seeks to fend off threats from his right flank.

“It seems like common sense, I’m sure all of us would agree that we only want U.S. citizens to vote in U.S. elections,” Johnson said, falsely suggesting that “so many people” are registering to vote when they obtain welfare benefits.

It is already a crime to register or vote as a noncitizen in all state and federal elections, though Washington, D.C., and a handful of municipalities in California, Maryland and Vermont allow noncitizen voting in local elections.

And few individuals break those laws.

“This is a crime where not only are the consequences really high and the payoff really low — you’re not getting millions of dollars, it’s not robbing a bank, you get to cast one ballot,” said Sean Morales-Doyle, a lawyer at the Brennan Center for Justice. “But what also makes this somewhat unique is that committing this crime actually entails the creation of a government record of your crime.”

Registering to vote and casting a ballot both leaves a paper trail that elected officials are required by law to routinely review. Some records are available to the public, as well.

“It’s very easy to catch, and you will get caught,” Morales-Doyle added.

The consequences are sweeping, too: noncitizens can face jail time, fines or deportation for voting illegally. Registering to vote alone could carry a five-year prison sentence, according to the Brennan Center.

On the flip side, Morales-Doyle said, requiring documentary proof of citizenship could disenfranchise millions of Americans who do not have access to passports or birth certificates.

Several states have tried to require documentary proof of citizenship in the past, but federal law currently prohibits it in federal elections. Arizona requires it for state elections, alone.

Many have investigated noncitizen voting and found little evidence of it. The Brennan Center found just 30 suspected noncitizen votes amid 23.5 million votes in 2016 , suggesting that suspected noncitizen votes accounted for 0.0001 % of votes cast. Trump’s own election integrity commission disbanded without releasing evidence of voter fraud, even though he’d claimed 3 million undocumented immigrants had voted in 2016 costing him the popular vote.

But Johnson and Trump have both long advanced baseless claims about election integrity. Johnson repeatedly promoted conspiracy theories about the 2020 election and its voting machines being rigged, and he recruited Republicans to back a lawsuit seeking to overturn states where Trump lost.

For Trump, however, the proposal fuses two of his favorite talking points: immigration and voter fraud. 

“It’s the sort of story that if you’re inclined to not like immigrants in the first place feels truthy,” said Justin Levitt, a former Biden advisor on democracy issues and election policy expert. “I think that has helped it stayed politically potent even if it hasn’t gotten more true.”

Levitt said when noncitizens do vote, it’s typically a misunderstanding or mistake. He said he recalled an instance where California residents in the process of naturalizing were told they had been granted citizenship and immediately left naturalization interviews to register to vote. They had not been formally sworn in as citizens, however, and therefore were not eligible yet.

Jane C. Timm is a senior reporter for NBC News.

Francis Collins: Why I’m going public with my prostate cancer diagnosis

I served medical research. now it’s serving me. and i don’t want to waste time..

Over my 40 years as a physician-scientist, I’ve had the privilege of advising many patients facing serious medical diagnoses. I’ve seen them go through the excruciating experience of waiting for the results of a critical blood test, biopsy or scan that could dramatically affect their future hopes and dreams.

But this time, I was the one lying in the PET scanner as it searched for possible evidence of spread of my aggressive prostate cancer . I spent those 30 minutes in quiet prayer. If that cancer had already spread to my lymph nodes, bones, lungs or brain, it could still be treated — but it would no longer be curable.

Why am I going public about this cancer that many men are uncomfortable talking about? Because I want to lift the veil and share lifesaving information, and I want all men to benefit from the medical research to which I’ve devoted my career and that is now guiding my care.

Five years before that fateful PET scan, my doctor had noted a slow rise in my PSA, the blood test for prostate-specific antigen. To contribute to knowledge and receive expert care, I enrolled in a clinical trial at the National Institutes of Health, the agency I led from 2009 through late 2021.

At first, there wasn’t much to worry about — targeted biopsies identified a slow-growing grade of prostate cancer that doesn’t require treatment and can be tracked via regular checkups, referred to as “active surveillance.” This initial diagnosis was not particularly surprising. Prostate cancer is the most commonly diagnosed cancer in men in the United States, and about 40 percent of men over age 65 — I’m 73 — have low-grade prostate cancer . Many of them never know it, and very few of them develop advanced disease.

Why am I going public about this cancer that many men are uncomfortable talking about? Because I want to lift the veil and share lifesaving information.

But in my case, things took a turn about a month ago when my PSA rose sharply to 22 — normal at my age is less than 5. An MRI scan showed that the tumor had significantly enlarged and might have even breached the capsule that surrounds the prostate, posing a significant risk that the cancer cells might have spread to other parts of the body.

New biopsies taken from the mass showed transformation into a much more aggressive cancer. When I heard the diagnosis was now a 9 on a cancer-grading scale that goes only to 10, I knew that everything had changed.

Thus, that PET scan, which was ordered to determine if the cancer had spread beyond the prostate, carried high significance. Would a cure still be possible, or would it be time to get my affairs in order? A few hours later, when my doctors showed me the scan results, I felt a rush of profound relief and gratitude. There was no detectable evidence of cancer outside of the primary tumor.

Later this month, I will undergo a radical prostatectomy — a procedure that will remove my entire prostate gland. This will be part of the same NIH research protocol — I want as much information as possible to be learned from my case, to help others in the future.

While there are no guarantees, my doctors believe I have a high likelihood of being cured by the surgery.

My situation is far better than my father’s when he was diagnosed with prostate cancer four decades ago. He was about the same age that I am now, but it wasn’t possible back then to assess how advanced the cancer might be. He was treated with a hormonal therapy that might not have been necessary and had a significant negative impact on his quality of life.

Because of research supported by NIH, along with highly effective collaborations with the private sector, prostate cancer can now be treated with individualized precision and improved outcomes.

As in my case, high-resolution MRI scans can now be used to delineate the precise location of a tumor. When combined with real-time ultrasound, this allows pinpoint targeting of the prostate biopsies. My surgeon will be assisted by a sophisticated robot named for Leonardo da Vinci that employs a less invasive surgical approach than previous techniques, requiring just a few small incisions.

Advances in clinical treatments have been informed by large-scale, rigorously designed trials that have assessed the risks and benefits and were possible because of the willingness of cancer patients to enroll in such trials.

I feel compelled to tell this story openly. I hope it helps someone. I don’t want to waste time.

If my cancer recurs, the DNA analysis that has been carried out on my tumor will guide the precise choice of therapies. As a researcher who had the privilege of leading the Human Genome Project , it is truly gratifying to see how these advances in genomics have transformed the diagnosis and treatment of cancer.

I want all men to have the same opportunity that I did. Prostate cancer is still the No. 2 killer of men. I want the goals of the Cancer Moonshot to be met — to end cancer as we know it. Early detection really matters, and when combined with active surveillance can identify the risky cancers like mine, and leave the rest alone. The five-year relative survival rate for prostate cancer is 97 percent, according to the American Cancer Society , but it’s only 34 percent if the cancer has spread to distant areas of the body.

But lack of information and confusion about the best approach to prostate cancer screening have impeded progress. Currently, the U.S. Preventive Services Task Force recommends that all men age 55 to 69 discuss PSA screening with their primary-care physician, but it recommends against starting PSA screening after age 70.

Other groups, like the American Urological Association , suggest that screening should start earlier, especially for men with a family history — like me — and for African American men, who have a higher risk of prostate cancer. But these recommendations are not consistently being followed.

Our health-care system is afflicted with health inequities. For example, the image-guided biopsies are not available everywhere and to everyone. Finally, many men are fearful of the surgical approach to prostate cancer because of the risk of incontinence and impotence, but advances in surgical techniques have made those outcomes considerably less troublesome than in the past. Similarly, the alternative therapeutic approaches of radiation and hormonal therapy have seen significant advances.

A little over a year ago, while I was praying for a dying friend, I had the experience of receiving a clear and unmistakable message. This has almost never happened to me. It was just this: “Don’t waste your time, you may not have much left.” Gulp.

Having now received a diagnosis of aggressive prostate cancer and feeling grateful for all the ways I have benefited from research advances, I feel compelled to tell this story openly. I hope it helps someone. I don’t want to waste time.

Francis S. Collins served as director of the National Institutes of Health from 2009 to 2021 and as director of the National Human Genome Research Institute at NIH from 1993 to 2008. He is a physician-geneticist and leads a White House initiative to eliminate hepatitis C in the United States, while also continuing to pursue his research interests as a distinguished NIH investigator.

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• Medical Mysteries: Years of hives and fevers traced to a startling cause April 13, 2024 Medical Mysteries: Years of hives and fevers traced to a startling cause April 13, 2024
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What Solar Eclipse-Gazing Has Looked Like for the Past 2 Centuries

Millions of people on Monday will continue the tradition of experiencing and capturing solar eclipses, a pursuit that has spawned a lot of unusual gear.

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By Sarah Eckinger

• April 8, 2024

For centuries, people have been clamoring to glimpse solar eclipses. From astronomers with custom-built photographic equipment to groups huddled together with special glasses, this spectacle has captivated the human imagination.

Creating a Permanent Record

In 1860, Warren de la Rue captured what many sources describe as the first photograph of a total solar eclipse . He took it in Rivabellosa, Spain, with an instrument known as the Kew Photoheliograph . This combination of a telescope and camera was specifically built to photograph the sun.

Forty years later, Nevil Maskelyne, a magician and an astronomy enthusiast, filmed a total solar eclipse in North Carolina. The footage was lost, however, and only released in 2019 after it was rediscovered in the Royal Astronomical Society’s archives.

Telescopic Vision

For scientists and astronomers, eclipses provide an opportunity not only to view the moon’s umbra and gaze at the sun’s corona, but also to make observations that further their studies. Many observatories, or friendly neighbors with a telescope, also make their instruments available to the public during eclipses.

Fredrik Hjalmar Johansen, Fridtjof Nansen and Sigurd Scott Hansen observing a solar eclipse while on a polar expedition in 1894 .

Women from Wellesley College in Massachusetts and their professor tested out equipment ahead of their eclipse trip (to “catch old Sol in the act,” as the original New York Times article phrased it) to New London, Conn., in 1922.

A group from Swarthmore College in Pennsylvania traveled to Yerbaniz, Mexico, in 1923, with telescopes and a 65-foot camera to observe the sun’s corona .

Dr. J.J. Nassau, director of the Warner and Swasey Observatory at Case School of Applied Science in Cleveland, prepared to head to Douglas Hill, Maine, to study an eclipse in 1932. An entire freight car was required to transport the institution’s equipment.

Visitors viewed a solar eclipse at an observatory in Berlin in the mid-1930s.

A family set up two telescopes in Bar Harbor, Maine, in 1963. The two children placed stones on the base to help steady them.

An astronomer examined equipment for an eclipse in a desert in Mauritania in June 1973. We credit the hot climate for his choice in outfit.

Indirect Light

If you see people on Monday sprinting to your local park clutching pieces of paper, or with a cardboard box of their head, they are probably planning to reflect or project images of the solar eclipse onto a surface.

Cynthia Goulakos demonstrated a safe way to view a solar eclipse , with two pieces of cardboard to create a reflection of the shadowed sun, in Lowell, Mass., in 1970.

Another popular option is to create a pinhole camera. This woman did so in Central Park in 1963 by using a paper cup with a small hole in the bottom and a twin-lens reflex camera.

Amateur astronomers viewed a partial eclipse, projected from a telescope onto a screen, from atop the Empire State Building in 1967 .

Back in Central Park, in 1970, Irving Schwartz and his wife reflected an eclipse onto a piece of paper by holding binoculars on the edge of a garbage basket.

Children in Denver in 1979 used cardboard viewing boxes and pieces of paper with small pinholes to view projections of a partial eclipse.

A crowd gathered around a basin of water dyed with dark ink, waiting for the reflection of a solar eclipse to appear, in Hanoi, Vietnam, in 1995.

Staring at the Sun (or, How Not to Burn Your Retinas)

Eclipse-gazers have used different methods to protect their eyes throughout the years, some safer than others .

In 1927, women gathered at a window in a building in London to watch a total eclipse through smoked glass. This was popularized in France in the 1700s , but fell out of favor when physicians began writing papers on children whose vision was damaged.

Another trend was to use a strip of exposed photographic film, as seen below in Sydney, Australia, in 1948 and in Turkana, Kenya, in 1963. This method, which was even suggested by The Times in 1979 , has since been declared unsafe.

Solar eclipse glasses are a popular and safe way to view the event ( if you use models compliant with international safety standards ). Over the years there have been various styles, including these large hand-held options found in West Palm Beach, Fla., in 1979.

Parents and children watched a partial eclipse through their eclipse glasses in Tokyo in 1981.

Slimmer, more colorful options were used in Nabusimake, Colombia, in 1998.

In France in 1999.

And in Iran and England in 1999.

And the best way to see the eclipse? With family and friends at a watch party, like this one in Isalo National Park in Madagascar in 2001.

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Panama Papers: trial begins of 27 Mossack Fonseca employees

Law firm’s founders among those to face money laundering charges after leak of 11.5m files in 2016

A criminal trial of 27 employees working for the law firm at the heart of the Panama Papers on money laundering charges has commenced in a Panamanian court.

Eight years ago, leaked financial records from the law firm Mossack Fonseca sparked international outrage at the use of offshore companies by wealthy individuals to commit tax fraud and hide assets.

In 2016, files from Mossack Fonseca were leaked to reporters at the German newspaper Süddeutsche Zeitung and shared with the US-based International Consortium of Investigative Journalists. Reporters from more than 100 media organisations, including the Guardian, collaborated to investigate the 11.5m files.

The firm’s founders, Jürgen Mossack and Ramón Fonseca Mora, are among those facing charges. They have previously denied any allegations against them, arguing that they had no control over the offshore companies that the firm set up for its clients. If convicted, they reportedly face up to 12 years in prison.

According to the Associated Press , Mossack attended the hearing to declare his innocence, telling reporters outside the courtroom that he was “very optimistic”. A representative for Fonseca told the court that his client was in hospital.

Battered by international criticism, Panama adopted new legislation modernising the country’s legal definition of money laundering in 2019. Aspects of the charges against the Mossack Fonseca employees concern activities predating the change in the law, which could complicate prosecutors’ attempts to convict them, according to the International Consortium of Investigative Journalists .

Panama’s supreme court previously ruled that creating shell companies used for tax fraud could not be considered a crime if the companies in question were created prior to 2019.

Mossack and Fonseca were both acquitted of separate charges two years ago after a judge directed that the firm did not handle or attempt to hide money stolen from Brazil as part of a major corruption scandal involving the state oil company codenamed Lava Jato or the Car Wash.

Offshore companies linked more than 100 politicians from around the world, including 12 national leaders, were discovered by journalists analysing the Panama Papers. They included $2bn in an offshore company belonging to the Russian cellist Sergei Roldugin, the friend of the President Vladimir Putin.

Nawaz Sharif , then prime minister of Pakistan, and Sigmundur Davíð Gunnlaugsson , prime minister of Iceland, were both forced from office amid public fury at hidden offshore wealth connected to their families.

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Sharif was disqualified from office and sentenced to 10 years’ imprisonment by the Pakistani supreme court after reporters discovered undeclared real estate secretly owned by his family through offshore companies. Gunnlaugsson was forced to resign after it was revealed that he had never declared his family’s ownership of an offshore company with a $1m claim against one of Iceland’s failed banks.

After publication of the Panama Papers investigation, countries around the world initiated proceedings to recover unpaid taxes that had been hidden using offshore companies. By 2021 more than $1.36bn in fines and penalties for unpaid taxes were said to have been recovered by exchequers around the world, including $253m recovered by HMRC in the UK.

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More on this story

Panama Papers whistleblower speaks out: ‘Politicians must act – now’

We were leaked the Panama Papers. Here’s how to bring down Putin’s cronies

EU states 'dragging their feet' over financial transparency, report finds

Panama Papers law firm Mossack Fonseca sues Netflix over The Laundromat

Meryl Streep on the Panama Papers: ‘People died to get the word out’

Fears UK law change could prevent scrutiny of money launderers

Deutsche Bank offices raided in connection with Panama Papers

Nevis: how the world’s most secretive offshore haven refuses to clean up

Money-laundering crackdown on public schools and law firms

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‘Panama Papers’ trial starts. 27 people charged in the worldwide money laundering case

Lawyers and court workers leave the Supreme Court during a recess for the trial of the “Panama Papers” money laundering case in Panama City, Monday, April 8, 2024. (AP Photo/Agustin Herrera)

The Supreme Court stands in Panama City, Monday, April 8, 2024 as the trial starts for those charged in connection with the worldwide “Panama Papers” money laundering case. (AP Photo/Agustin Herrera)

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PANAMA CITY (AP) — The trial of 27 people charged in connection with the worldwide “Panama Papers” money laundering started Monday in a Panamanian criminal court.

Those on trial include the owners of the Mossack-Fonseca law firm that was at the heart of the 2016 massive document leak.

The Panama Papers include a collection of 11 million secret financial documents that illustrate how some of the world’s richest people hide their money.

The repercussions of the leaks have been far-ranging, prompting the resignation of the prime minister of Iceland and bringing scrutiny to the leaders of Argentina and Ukraine, Chinese politicians and Russian President Vladimir Putin, among others.

The often-delayed trial opened Monday, with lawyers Juergen Mossack, Ramón Fonseca and other former representatives, lawyers or ex-employees of the firm facing money laundering charges.

Mossack was present in the courtroom, and said “I am not guilty of such acts.”

Lawyers for Fonseca said he was in a hospital in Panama.

The case centers on allegations the firm set up shell companies to acquire properties in Panama with money from a sprawling corruption scheme in Brazil known as the Car Wash , or Lava Jato in Portuguese.

Fonseca has said the firm, which closed in 2018, had no control over how its clients might use offshore vehicles created for them. Both Mossack and Fonseca have Panamanian citizenship, and Panama does not extradite its own citizens.

The two were acquitted on other charges in 2022.

The records were first leaked to the German daily Suddeutsche Zeitung, and were shared with the International Consortium of Investigative Journalists, which began publishing collaborative reports with news organizations in 2016.

U.S. federal prosecutors have alleged that Mossack Fonseca conspired to circumvent American laws to maintain the wealth of its clients and conceal tax dollars owed to the IRS. They alleged the scheme dates to 2000 and involved sham foundations and shell companies in Panama, Hong Kong and the British Virgin Islands.

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