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40 Top Parenting Tips for Navigating Homework Challenges

Dr. Roseann Capanna-Hodge

• October 6, 2023

Navigating the intricacies of homework assignments can often feel like a maze for both parents and children alike . As someone deeply involved in child development and having worked closely with many educators, I've gathered a wealth of insights into establishing a solid homework routine. 

This article is a compilation of those tried-and-tested homework tips, aimed to ease challenges and enhance productivity. Whether you're looking to foster a deeper connection with your child's teacher or seeking effective strategies to prioritize tasks, I'm here to guide you.

Homework Tips for Parents: Break the Stress and Boost Learning Hacks from a Children’s Psychologist

Homework tip: setting up the environment.

• Establish a Routine: Set a specific time and place for homework to create consistency and predictability.
• Routine Consistency: Keep the routine consistent, even on weekends, so the child knows what to expect.
• Provide a Quiet Space: Ensure your child has a quiet, well-lit, and comfortable place to work, free from distractions. 
• Limit Distractions: Keep TVs, mobile phones, and other distracting electronics off during homework time.
• Limit Overall Stimuli: A clutter-free workspace can reduce distractions. Try to minimize items on their workspace that they might fidget with or get distracted by.
• Stay Organized: Use planners, calendars, or apps to keep track of assignment due dates.
• Equip the Space: Stock the homework area with essential supplies such as pencils, paper, erasers, and rulers

Homework Tip: Instruction Support

• Clear and Concise Instructions: Ensure instructions are short and to the point. Use visuals and watch for body language signals that show understanding.

• Break Tasks Into Manageable Chunks : If an assignment is extensive, break it down into smaller steps to make it more manageable.
• Chunking Information: Divide information into smaller, more digestible chunks. This can make the work seem more manageable.
• Set Time Limits: Use a timer to allocate specific amounts of time for each task, helping children stay on track.
• Timers: Use a visual timer, so they can see how much time they have left to work. This can make the passage of time more tangible.
• Teach Time Management: Help them prioritize their tasks, tackling more challenging or urgent assignments first.
• Stay Involved: Regularly check in with your child about their assignments and progress, offering guidance when needed.
• Interactive Tools: Consider using interactive educational tools or apps that can make learning more engaging for them.
• Ask Them To Explain What The Task Is: Gage what your child understands before they start the task. This will help set them in the right direction and give you a sense of what they know.

Homework Tip: Brain Hacks

• Physical Activity: Encourage short bursts of physical activity during breaks, like jumping jacks or a quick walk around the block. Physical activity can help increase attention span.
• Encourage Breaks: For longer homework sessions, ensure kids take short breaks to rest their minds and bodies.
• Offer Healthy Snacks : Brain-boosting snacks can help maintain energy and focus during study time. Fizzy drinks such as a seltzer-magnesium drink can stimulate and calm the brain.
• Shorter Work Periods: Divide homework time into shorter, more frequent sessions. For instance, instead of a continuous 30-minute session, try three 10-minute sessions with short breaks in between.
• Visual Schedules: Use visual aids like charts or diagrams to outline the tasks that need completion. This can help them understand what's expected and track their progress.
• Tactile Tools: For some children, using tactile tools like stress balls or fidget toys can help them channel their extra energy and maintain focus.

• Background Music: Some children focus better with low-volume, non-distracting background music or white noise. But others are stressed by it , so play around and do what works best for them (not you!). 
• Color Coding: Use colors to categorize and prioritize tasks. This can help visually differentiate and organize their work.
• Mindfulness and Relaxation Techniques: Mindfulness techniques like deep breathing, visualization, or even short meditation sessions can help center their attention.

Homework Tip: Monitoring, Communication and Positive Reinforcement

• Stay Positive : In your own mindset. Focus on the effort and improvements, not just the end result. Praise hard work and resilience.
• Encourage Independence Over Time: While it's essential to offer support, allow kids to complete assignments on their own as they build skills before you check the work. This fosters responsibility and self-reliance.
• Be Available for Questions: Make sure your child knows they can come to you if they have questions or need clarification on a topic.
• Connect Learning to Real Life: Help your child see the real-world applications of what they're learning to make it more engaging.
• Review Completed Assignments: Go over finished homework to ensure understanding and check for errors, but avoid doing the work for them.
• Explain Consequences and Establish Rewards: Positive reinforcement can motivate your child. Consider rewards for consistent homework completion.
• Encourage a Growth Mindset: Teach your child to see challenges as opportunities for growth. Emphasize the value of persistence and learning from mistakes. Talk to kids about how regular practice builds skills even when the learning is hard!
• Positive Reinforcement: Reinforce positive behavior immediately. If they've focused well for a short span, reward that effort to encourage repetition of the desired behavior.
• Active Participation: Encourage them to engage actively with their work, such as reading aloud or teaching the content back to you. This can reinforce their understanding and attention.
• Regular Check-ins: Check in more frequently during their homework sessions, offering guidance, encouraging movement to support brain alertness.
• Immediate Feedback: Give immediate feedback on their work. This keeps them engaged and lets them know they're on the right track.
• Open Communication: Ensure your child feels comfortable discussing their challenges with you. Sometimes, they might have insights into what might help them focus better.

Long Game Parent Homework Tips

• Stay Informed: If your child has a diagnosed attention disorder, like ADHD, stay updated with the latest strategies and recommendations specific to their needs. You can join our CALM Brain Parenting Community for science-backed solutions to support attention and learning. 
• Stay in Touch with Teachers: Regular communication with educators can give insights into how your child is doing and where they might need additional help. They may benefit from school accommodations or more formal IEP support .
• Seek External Support: If focus issues persist, consider seeking help from a tutor, educational therapist, or counselor familiar with attention challenges.

Reflecting on these pivotal parent homework tips, it becomes evident that with the right strategies, we can turn potential struggles into stepping stones for success. By instilling a consistent homework routine and maintaining open communication with your child, we're setting the stage for academic achievements. 

Each child is a unique individual, and it's crucial to discover what resonates best with them during homework time. It is also important to look for root causes better and better understand why your child is struggling . 

With these tools at your disposal, I'm confident in your ability to lead your child through the myriad tasks and challenges that lie ahead. Together, let's make every homework session a journey of growth and discovery and tamp down frustration!

Always remember… “Calm Brain, Happy Family™”

Disclaimer: This article is not intended to give health advice and it is recommended to consult with a physician before beginning any new wellness regime. *The effectiveness of diagnosis and treatment vary by patient and condition. Dr. Roseann Capanna-Hodge, LLC does not guarantee certain results.

Are you looking for SOLUTIONS for your struggling child or teen? 

Dr. Roseann and her team are all about science-backed solutions, so you are in the right place!

Grab your complimentary copy of 147 Therapist-Endorsed Self-Regulation Strategies for Children: A Practical Guide for Parents

You can get her books for parents and professionals, including: It’s Gonna Be OK™: Proven Ways to Improve Your Child’s Mental Health , Teletherapy Toolkit™ and Brain Under Attack: A Resource For Parents and Caregivers of Children With PANS, PANDAS, and Autoimmune Encephalopathy.

If you are a business or organization that needs proactive guidance to support employee mental health or an organization looking for a brand representative, check out Dr. Roseann’s professional speaking page to see how we can work together.

Dr. Roseann is a Children’s Mental Health Expert and Therapist who has been featured in/on hundreds of  media outlets including, CBS, NBC, FOX News, PIX11 NYC, The New York Times, The Washington Post, Business Insider, USA Today, CNET, Marth Stewart, and PARENTS. FORBES called her, “A thought leader in children’s mental health.” 

She is the founder and director of The Global Institute of Children’s Mental Health and Dr. Roseann Capanna-Hodge, LLC. Dr. Roseann is a Board Certified Neurofeedback (BCN) Practitioner, a Board Member of the Northeast Region Biofeedback Society (NRBS), Certified Integrative Mental Health Professional (CIMHP) and an Amen Clinic Certified Brain Health Coach.  She is also a member of The International Lyme Disease and Associated Disease Society (ILADS), The American Psychological Association (APA), Anxiety and Depression Association of America (ADAA) National Association of School Psychologists (NASP), International OCD Foundation (IOCDF) International Society for Neurofeedback and Research (ISNR) and The Association of Applied Psychophysiology and Biofeedback (AAPB).

© Roseann-Capanna-Hodge, LLC 2023

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Khan Academy Blog

Making Homework Easier: Tips and Tools for Parents 

posted on September 20, 2023

By Stephanie Yamkovenko , group manager of Khan Academy’s Digital Marketing Team.

Homework can present challenges for parents and children alike. You naturally want to provide support for your child’s learning journey and ensure they are reaching their full potential. In this blog post, we will delve into practical strategies to assist your child with their homework. From fostering understanding and offering encouragement to breaking down tasks and implementing rewards, we will explore a variety of effective approaches to help your child achieve academic success.

Step 1: Set Up Your Child for Success

Your child’s study environment can have a significant impact on their homework performance. Create a space that is free from distractions like the television, smartphones, or noisy siblings. The study space should be comfortable, well lit, and have all the necessary materials your child might need, such as pens, papers, and textbooks. If your child’s workspace is noisy or uncomfortable, they may have difficulty focusing on their homework, resulting in lower productivity. 

For example, if you live in a small apartment, consider setting up a designated corner with a small desk or table where your child can focus on their work. You can use dividers or screens to create a sense of privacy and minimize distractions.

If the only place to do homework is in the dining room or kitchen, try to establish a routine where the area is cleared and organized before study time. This can help signal to your child that it’s time to concentrate and be productive.

Remember, it’s important to adapt to your specific circumstances and make the best of the available space. The key is to create a dedicated study area that promotes focus and minimizes interruptions regardless of the size or location of your home.

Try Confidence Boosters for Your Child Here!

Step 2: make it fun.

It’s important to make homework fun and engaging for your child. Here are some examples of how you can do it:

• Use games : Incorporate educational games like card games, board games, or puzzles that align with the subject your child is learning. For instance, use Scrabble to practice spelling or Sudoku to enhance problem-solving skills.
• Turn it into a challenge : Create a friendly competition between siblings or friends by setting goals or time limits for completing assignments. Offer small rewards or incentives for accomplishing tasks.
• Make it interactive : Use hands-on activities or experiments to reinforce concepts learned in class. For science or math, conduct simple experiments at home or use manipulatives like blocks or counters to visualize abstract concepts.
• Use technology : Explore online educational platforms or apps that offer interactive learning experiences. There are various educational games, virtual simulations, and videos available that can make homework more enjoyable.
• Incorporate creativity : Encourage your child to express their understanding through art, storytelling, or multimedia presentations. For example, they can create a comic strip to summarize a story or make a short video to explain a concept.

Remember, by making homework enjoyable, you can help your child develop a positive attitude towards learning.

Step 3: Use Rewards

Rewards can be a powerful motivational tool for children. Offering positive reinforcement can encourage them to complete their homework on time and to the best of their ability. 

Here are some examples of rewards our team has used with their children:

• Extra screen time: “I use Apple parental controls to add screen time on their iPad.”
• Access to a favorite toy: “My eight year old has a drum kit, which drives us all up the wall. (Thanks, Grandma!) But when they’ve been doing a lot of school work, we put on headphones and let him go nuts.”
• Praise for a job well done: “Specific, measurable praise is what works best.” 
• Trip to the park: “A trip to the park is good for everyone, especially for the kids to run around with the doggos.”
• Movie night: “I know every word and song lyric in Moana ; we now reserve showings for good behavior.” 
• Stickers or stamps: “Gold stars were such a thing growing up in the 80s; turns out they still work.”
• Stay up a little later: “An extra 30 minutes feels like a whole day for my young ones; use this reward with caution as it can become the expectation!”

So, celebrate your child’s efforts and encourage them to continue doing their best.

Step 4: Break Down Difficult Tasks

When facing daunting homework assignments, follow these step-by-step instructions to break down the tasks into smaller, manageable chunks:

• Understand the requirements and scope of the task.
• Break down the assignment into individual tasks or sub-tasks.  
• Splitting the middle term
• Using formula
• Using Quadratic formula
• Using algebraic identities
• Determine the order in which tasks should be completed based on importance or difficulty. 
• Start with the easiest task. Begin with the task that seems the least challenging or time-consuming.
• Progress to more challenging tasks: Once the easier tasks are completed, move on to more difficult ones.
• Take breaks: Schedule short breaks between tasks to avoid burnout and maintain focus.
• Check completed tasks for accuracy and make any necessary revisions.
• Finish the remaining task(s) with the same approach.
• Celebrate small achievements to boost confidence and keep motivation high.

By following these steps, you can make daunting homework assignments more manageable and less overwhelming for your child.

Step 5: Get Targeted Help

If your child is struggling with homework, it might be worth considering seeking personalized assistance. You have the option to search for professional tutors or explore online tutoring platforms, such as Khan Academy’s AI tutor, Khanmigo .

This AI tutor can offer personalized guidance and support tailored to your child’s specific needs, helping them grasp complex concepts and practice essential skills. Incorporating this approach can effectively complement your child’s learning and enhance their homework performance.

Enhance your child’s learning and boost homework performance!

Homework can be a challenge for both parents and children. But with the right approach, you can help your child overcome difficulties and support their learning. Encourage and understand your child, create a comfortable environment, break down difficult tasks, use rewards, get professional help when needed, and make it fun. With these tips and techniques, you can help your child achieve success, develop a love for learning, and achieve academic excellence. Remember that each child learns differently, so it’s essential to adjust your approach to meet their unique needs.

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How Important Is Homework, And How Much Should Parents Help?

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A version of this post was  originally published  by Parenting Translator. Sign up for  the newsletter  and follow Parenting Translator  on Instagram .

In recent years, homework has become a very hot topic . Many parents and educators have raised concerns about homework and questioned how effective it is in enhancing students’ learning. There are also concerns that students may be getting too much homework, which ultimately interferes with quality family time and opportunities for physical activity and play . Research suggests that these concerns may be valid. For example, one study reported that elementary school students, on average, are assigned three times  the recommended amount of homework.

So what does the research say? What are the potential risks and benefits of homework, and how much is too much?

Academic benefits

First, research finds that homework is associated with higher scores on academic standardized tests for middle and high school students, but not elementary school students . A recent experimental study in Romania found some benefit for a small amount of writing homework in elementary students but not math homework. Yet, interestingly, this positive impact only occurred when students were given a moderate amount of homework (about 20 minutes on average).

Non-academic benefits

The goal of homework is not simply to improve academic skills. Research finds that homework may have some non-academic benefits, such as building responsibility , time management skills, and task persistence . Homework may also increase parents’ involvement in their children’s schooling. Yet, too much homework may also have some negative impacts on non-academic skills by reducing opportunities for free play , which is essential for the development of language, cognitive, self-regulation and social-emotional skills. Homework may also interfere with physical activity and too much homework is associated with an increased risk for being overweight . As with the research on academic benefits, this research also suggests that homework may be beneficial when it is minimal.

What is the “right” amount of homework?

Research suggests that homework should not exceed 1.5 to 2.5 hours per night for high school students and no more than one hour per night for middle school students. Homework for elementary school students should be minimal and assigned with the aim of building self-regulation and independent work skills. Any more than this and homework may no longer have a positive impact. 

The National Education Association recommends 10 minutes of homework per grade and there is also some experimental evidence that backs this up.

Overall translation

Research finds that homework provides some academic benefit for middle and high school students but is less beneficial for elementary school students. Research suggests that homework should be none or minimal for elementary students, less than one hour per night for middle school students, and less than 1.5 to 2.5 hours for high school students. 

What can parents do?

Research finds that parental help with homework is beneficial but that it matters more how the parent is helping rather than  how often  the parent is helping.

So how should parents help with homework, according to the research? 

• Focus on providing general monitoring, guidance and encouragement, but allow children to generate answers on their own and complete their homework as independently as possible . Specifically, be present while they are completing homework to help them to understand the directions, be available to answer simple questions, or praise and acknowledge their effort and hard work. Research shows that allowing children more autonomy in completing homework may benefit their academic skills.
• Only provide help when your child asks for it and step away whenever possible. Research finds that too much parental involvement or intrusive and controlling involvement with homework is associated with worse academic performance . 
• Help your children to create structure and develop some routines that help your child to independently complete their homework . Have a regular time and place for homework that is free from distractions and has all of the materials they need within arm’s reach. Help your child to create a checklist for homework tasks. Create rules for homework with your child. Help children to develop strategies for increasing their own self-motivation. For example, developing their own reward system or creating a homework schedule with breaks for fun activities. Research finds that providing this type of structure and responsiveness is related to improved academic skills.
• Set specific rules around homework. Research finds an association between parents setting rules around homework and academic performance. 
• Help your child to view homework as an opportunity to learn and improve skills. Parents who view homework as a learning opportunity (that is, a “mastery orientation”) rather than something that they must get “right” or complete successfully to obtain a higher grade (that is, a “performance orientation”) are more likely to have children with the same attitudes. 
• Encourage your child to persist in challenging assignments and emphasize difficult assignments as opportunities to grow . Research finds that this attitude is associated with student success. Research also indicates that more challenging homework is associated with enhanced academic performance.
• Stay calm and positive during homework. Research shows that mothers showing positive emotions while helping with homework may improve children’s motivation in homework.
• Praise your child’s hard work and effort during homework.   This type of praise is likely to increase motivation. In addition, research finds that putting more effort into homework may be associated with enhanced development of conscientiousness in children.
• Communicate with your child and the teacher about any problems your child has with homework and the teacher’s learning goals. Research finds that open communication about homework is associated with increased academic performance.

Cara Goodwin, PhD, is a licensed psychologist, a mother of three and the founder of  Parenting Translator , a nonprofit newsletter that turns scientific research into information that is accurate, relevant and useful for parents.

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How to Help Kids With Homework

Helping your child with their homework is an opportunity to connect with them and improve their chances of academic success. As a parent, you can reinforce concepts taught in the classroom and nurture good study habits . Helping with homework shows your child that you believe their education is important.

What Is the Best Way I Can Help My Child With Homework?

You don’t need to be a certified teacher or an expert in a subject in order to help with homework. You can help by developing your child's time management skills, introducing strategies to stay organized, and offering words of encouragement. 

Here are some homework tips for parents:

• Know their teacher . Attending parent-teacher conferences, getting involved in school events, and knowing how to get in touch with your child’s teacher can help you better understand homework expectations.
• Family study time.  Set aside time every day for homework. Some kids do best by jumping into homework right after school, while others need a break and will be better focused after dinner. 
• Set a good example. Family study time gives you the opportunity to model studious behavior. Demonstrate the importance of organization and diligence by paying bills or planning your family’s budget during this shared time. Reading while your child completes their homework instills the idea that learning is a lifelong and enjoyable pursuit. Your example will be far more impactful than your lectures.
• Designate a homework space.  Having a designated space for homework can help your child stay on task. It should be well lit and have extra school supplies within reach.
• Help with time management.  If your student has a lot of homework, encourage them to break the workload into smaller and more manageable tasks. Create a schedule for the evening to ensure they get through their long to-do list , including opportunities for breaks.
• Don’t do the homework for them.  Helping your child with homework isn’t the same as doing your child’s homework. You can make suggestions, but your child must do the work for meaningful learning to take place. Have patience, allow them to struggle a little, and resist the urge to simply give them the answers.

How Do I Help a Child Struggling With Homework?

Struggling through challenges is an important part of learning. Research shows that something called “productive struggle” is essential to learning new concepts. Too much struggle, however, can be demoralizing and counterproductive. So where's the line drawn between productive struggling and counterproductive struggling? You know your child better than anyone, so trust your instincts and step in before your student becomes overwhelmed.  

Consider these tips if your child's struggling with homework:

• If your child's already stressed out or frustrated, start with taking a break.
• Engage your child in a conversation so you can understand where they're stuck 
• Offer hints or guidance to help them move forward
• Resist the urge to do their homework or give them the answers
• As soon as your child understands how to resolve the issue, step back and let them continue without your direct assistance
• Avoid stressful cramming and last-minute panic by helping your student plan ahead for tests and long-term assignments.
• Offer your child encouragement and praise them for their perseverance.
• Work on your own paperwork or read nearby as your child completes their homework to help them stay on task.
• Reach out to the teacher if additional assistance is needed and remind your child to ask questions at school when they're confused

Should I Help My Child With Math Homework?

Math is taught differently now than it was twenty or thirty years ago. The Common Core Standards are used in 41 states, and most other states follow the same principles even if they don’t call them the Common Core. Instead of memorizing specific ways to solve math problems, students today are asked to solve problems in several different ways and explain the strategy they used. 

For many parents, their child’s math homework seems complicated and confusing. The goal of this newer method, however, is a deeper understanding of mathematics. Just because you learned math in a different way doesn’t mean you can’t help with math homework. 

• Focus on non-academic help . You can help your student by offering encouragement, tracking assignments, and helping with time management. Create a distraction-free time and place for them to focus on their math homework. 
• Learn how it’s taught. Understand how math is taught at your child’s school. Some school districts offer parents a math night or online resources to help them better understand the way math is taught at schools.
• Reach out to the teacher. Ask the teacher for insight on how you can support your student at home. They might point you towards resources that align with their curriculum or offer additional help to your student at school.

At What Age Do You Stop Helping With Homework?

Some research has shown that the connection between student achievement and parental involvement in schoolwork is strongest in the elementary years but declines in middle school. By the time your child enters middle school, parents helping with homework can do more harm than good. At this stage, parental help with homework is associated with lower student achievement.

While you should be helping a lot less with homework, middle school isn't the time to retreat from your child's education. Non-homework forms of parent involvement are strongly associated with higher academic achievement. There are many ways you can support your middle schooler’s success. 

• Monitor assignments and test scores
• Attend school events
• Participate in parent-teacher conferences
• Ask questions about classes and what your child is learning
• Continue to encourage a regular study time and place at home

Ideally, you laid the groundwork in the elementary years and good study habits are well established by middle school. While your child will outgrow the need for your direct homework assistance, they'll never outgrow the need for your support and encouragement. 

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How to Help Your Child Study

Regardless of a child’s age or challenges, parents can encourage sound homework routines for a successful start to the school year.

By Brian Platzer and Abby Freireich

Every cartful of new school supplies is loaded with promise: binders organized by subject, crisp homework folders and pristine notebooks. But for many parents it can feel like it’s just a short hop from those freshly sharpened pencils to a child in full meltdown over a barely started English essay.

You don’t have to let go of the optimism. As parents, teachers and tutors, we have some concrete advice for staving off the tears — for both parents and children.

Regardless of a child’s age or challenges, parents can encourage sound homework routines for a successful start to the school year. First, students should consider how to create organized work spaces, backpacks and lockers cleared of clutter and systematized for easy retrieval of important assignments. Second, nightly to-do checklists are a must to help prioritize and plan ahead.

But many students still struggle when it comes to homework. Their stress tends to be exacerbated by three primary challenges: procrastinating , feeling overwhelmed and struggling to retain information . Ideally, parents can help elementary school children develop effective homework habits so they will not need as much guidance as they get older. Parents who are not home during their kids’ prime homework hours can try out some of these ideas on the weekends and pass along the best practices to their caregivers.

For Procrastination

Reduce potential distractions..

Many students finish reading a sentence, and then refresh their Instagram feed. Ideally, their phones should be nowhere near them during homework time. Or they should disable or mute apps and texting functions on the phone and computer while they work. We know this will mean a grumpy adolescent. But it’s a battle worth fighting. Establish a family tech-space where phones and laptops go when not in use. And model these boundaries by leaving your devices there, too!

Back to School Shopping Made Easy

Send your kids to school with A+ supplies that will last the year through. We worked with the experts at Wirecutter to compile this list of essentials that’ll make shopping for school supplies a breeze.

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Strategies to make homework go more smoothly.

Routines and incentive systems to help kids succeed

Writer: Peg Dawson, EdD, NCSP

Clinical Expert: Peg Dawson, EdD, NCSP

Here is the best guide to helping kids do homework successfully that we’ve seen, published by the National Association of School Psychologists on their website, NASPonline.org . Our thanks to NASP for sharing it with us.

There are two key strategies parents can draw on to reduce homework hassles. The first is to establish clear routines around homework, including when and where homework gets done and setting up daily schedules for homework. The second is to build in rewards or incentives to use with children for whom “good grades” is not a sufficient reward for doing homework.

Homework Routines

Tasks are easiest to accomplish when tied to specific routines. By establishing daily routines for homework completion, you will not only make homework go more smoothly, but you will also be fostering a sense of order your child can apply to later life, including college and work.

Step 1. Find a location in the house where homework will be done. The right location will depend on your child and the culture of your family. Some children do best at a desk in their bedroom. It is a quiet location, away from the hubbub of family noise. Other children become too distracted by the things they keep in their bedroom and do better at a place removed from those distractions, like the dining room table. Some children need to work by themselves. Others need to have parents nearby to help keep them on task and to answer questions when problems arise. Ask your child where the best place is to work. Both you and your child need to discuss pros and cons of different settings to arrive at a mutually agreed upon location.

Step 2. Set up a homework center. Once you and your child have identified a location, fix it up as a home office/homework center. Make sure there is a clear workspace large enough to set out all the materials necessary for completing assignments. Outfit the homework center with the kinds of supplies your child is most likely to need, such as pencils, pens, colored markers, rulers, scissors, a dictionary and thesaurus, graph paper, construction paper, glue and cellophane tape, lined paper, a calculator, spell checker, and, depending on the age and needs of your child, a computer or laptop. If the homework center is a place that will be used for other things (such as the dining room table), then your child can keep the supplies in a portable crate or bin. If possible, the homework center should include a bulletin board that can hold a monthly calendar on which your child can keep track of longterm assignments. Allowing children some leeway in decorating the homework center can help them feel at home there, but you should be careful that it does not become too cluttered with distracting materials.

Step 3. Establish a homework time. Your child should get in the habit of doing homework at the same time every day. The time may vary depending on the individual child. Some children need a break right after school to get some exercise and have a snack. Others need to start homework while they are still in a school mode (i.e., right after school when there is still some momentum left from getting through the day). In general, it may be best to get homework done either before dinner or as early in the evening as the child can tolerate. The later it gets, the more tired the child becomes and the more slowly the homework gets done.

Step 4. Establish a daily homework schedule. In general, at least into middle school, the homework session should begin with your sitting down with your child and drawing up a homework schedule. You should review all the assignments and make sure your child understands them and has all the necessary materials. Ask your child to estimate how long it will take to complete each assignment. Then ask when each assignment will get started. If your child needs help with any assignment , then this should be determined at the beginning so that the start times can take into account parent availability. A Daily Homework Planner is included at the end of this handout and contains a place for identifying when breaks may be taken and what rewards may be earned.

Incentive Systems

Many children who are not motivated by the enjoyment of doing homework are motivated by the high grade they hope to earn as a result of doing a quality job. Thus, the grade is an incentive, motivating the child to do homework with care and in a timely manner. For children who are not motivated by grades, parents will need to look for other rewards to help them get through their nightly chores. Incentive systems fall into two categories: simple and elaborate.

Simple incentive systems. The simplest incentive system is reminding the child of a fun activity to do when homework is done. It may be a favorite television show, a chance to spend some time with a video or computer game, talking on the telephone or instant messaging, or playing a game with a parent. This system of withholding fun things until the drudgery is over is sometimes called Grandma’s Law because grandmothers often use it quite effectively (“First take out the trash, then you can have chocolate chip cookies.”). Having something to look forward to can be a powerful incentive to get the hard work done. When parents remind children of this as they sit down at their desks they may be able to spark the engine that drives the child to stick with the work until it is done.

Elaborate incentive systems. These involve more planning and more work on the part of parents but in some cases are necessary to address more significant homework problems. More complex incentives systems might include a structure for earning points that could be used to “purchase” privileges or rewards or a system that provides greater reward for accomplishing more difficult homework tasks. These systems work best when parents and children together develop them. Giving children input gives them a sense of control and ownership, making the system more likely to succeed. We have found that children are generally realistic in setting goals and deciding on rewards and penalties when they are involved in the decision-making process.

Building in breaks. These are good for the child who cannot quite make it to the end without a small reward en route. When creating the daily homework schedule, it may be useful with these children to identify when they will take their breaks. Some children prefer to take breaks at specific time intervals (every 15 minutes), while others do better when the breaks occur after they finish an activity. If you use this approach, you should discuss with your child how long the breaks will last and what will be done during the breaks (get a snack, call a friend, play one level on a video game). The Daily Homework Planner includes sections where breaks and end-of-homework rewards can be identified.

Building in choice. This can be an effective strategy for parents to use with children who resist homework. Choice can be incorporated into both the order in which the child agrees to complete assignments and the schedule they will follow to get the work done. Building in choice not only helps motivate children but can also reduce power struggles between parents and children.

Developing Incentive Systems

Step 1. Describe the problem behaviors. Parents and children decide which behaviors are causing problems at homework time. For some children putting homework off to the last minute is the problem; for others, it is forgetting materials or neglecting to write down assignments. Still others rush through their work and make careless mistakes, while others dawdle over assignments, taking hours to complete what should take only a few minutes. It is important to be as specific as possible when describing the problem behaviors. The problem behavior should be described as behaviors that can be seen or heard; for instance, complains about h omework or rushes through homework, making many mistakes are better descriptors than has a bad attitude or is lazy.

Step 2. Set a goal. Usually the goal relates directly to the problem behavior. For instance, if not writing down assignments is the problem, the goal might be: “Joe will write down his assignments in his assignment book for every class.”

Step 3. Decide on possible rewards and penalties. Homework incentive systems work best when children have a menu of rewards to choose from, since no single reward will be attractive for long. We recommend a point system in which points can be earned for the goal behaviors and traded in for the reward the child wants to earn. The bigger the reward, the more points the child will need to earn it. The menu should include both larger, more expensive rewards that may take a week or a month to earn and smaller, inexpensive rewards that can be earned daily. It may also be necessary to build penalties into the system. This is usually the loss of a privilege (such as the chance to watch a favorite TV show or the chance to talk on the telephone to a friend).

Once the system is up and running, and if you find your child is earning more penalties than rewards, then the program needs to be revised so that your child can be more successful. Usually when this kind of system fails, we think of it as a design failure rather than the failure of the child to respond to rewards. It may be a good idea if you are having difficulty designing a system that works to consult a specialist, such as a school psychologist or counselor, for assistance.

Step 4. Write a homework contract. The contract should say exactly what the child agrees to do and exactly what the parents’ roles and responsibilities will be. When the contract is in place, it should reduce some of the tension parents and kids often experience around homework. For instance, if part of the contract is that the child will earn a point for not complaining about homework, then if the child does complain, this should not be cause for a battle between parent and child: the child simply does not earn that point. Parents should also be sure to praise their children for following the contract. It will be important for parents to agree to a contract they can live with; that is, avoiding penalties they are either unable or unwilling to impose (e.g., if both parents work and are not at home, they cannot monitor whether a child is beginning homework right after school, so an alternative contract may need to be written).

We have found that it is a rare incentive system that works the first time. Parents should expect to try it out and redesign it to work the kinks out. Eventually, once the child is used to doing the behaviors specified in the contract, the contract can be rewritten to work on another problem behavior. Your child over time may be willing to drop the use of an incentive system altogether. This is often a long-term goal, however, and you should be ready to write a new contract if your child slips back to bad habits once a system is dropped.

Click here to download the homework planner and incentive sheet .

Frequently Asked Questions

To help homework go more smoothly, e stablish a routine that includes a time and place where it will be done, a planner that lists each assignment, scheduled breaks when some of the work is done, and a reward system for kids who are not motivated by good grades alone.  

Set a good homework routine following these steps: Find a location in the house where homework will be done. Set up a homework center stocked with needed materials . Establish a homework time. Use a daily homework planner so that your child has everything in writing.  

One tool that can make homework go more smoothly i s a Daily Homework Planner , which lists each assignment, how long it should take to complete, and what rewards may be earned for completing each assignment.    

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How Parents Can Help With Homework (Without Taking Over)

Sometimes taking the stress out of homework means taking a step back. learn how to curb your hands-on habits and help your kids do their best..

After a long day at school, the last thing my kids want to do is tackle their assignments. And after a long day at work, arguing with them about homework is the last thing my husband and I want to do. But we’ve always thought that the more involved we were, the better off they’d be.

It turns out that that isn’t necessarily true: After looking at 30 years’ worth of studies, researchers concluded that in most cases, such parental interest actually doesn’t help raise test scores or grades — and sometimes backfires. The reason: When parents are overly immersed in homework, they deny kids the chance to become more independent and confident. Worse, it can breed anxiety along the way.

Of course, backing off is easier said than done. So we asked education pros to share their secrets for helping kids study without hovering. Use these techniques to bring peace to your evenings — starting tonight!

Old way:  Sit beside your child so you can answer questions and fix his mistakes. New way:  Stay available by doing chores nearby.

When you hover, you essentially send the message to your kid that you don’t think he can do the work. To empower him instead, stay busy and wait until he asks for your help, says Miriam Liss, Ph.D., author of Balancing the Big Stuff: Finding Happiness in Work, Family, and Life.

For example, say your child is stumped by a math problem. You could ask questions (“So how many groups of two equal eight?”). If he says, “Got it,” leave him alone. If he continues to struggle, make suggestions (“Hey, do you want to use baby carrots as manipulatives?”). He’ll feel a greater sense of accomplishment if he’s worked for the answer mostly on his own.

Also avoid stepping in to correct every mistake without your child’s input. “Homework is a chance for a child to practice what he’s learned in class,” explains Jacqueline Cross, a fourth-grade teacher in Hingham, MA. “If he’s really challenged by long division, I’d like to know that so I can help.”

If your child asks you to look over his worksheet, point out the errors in a subtle way. Say, “Can you go back and see where you went wrong here?” or even do a quick reminder of the point of the exercise (“Remember, you’re supposed to be finding coins that add up to four dollars. Want to count these numbers out loud and I’ll listen?”).

Old way:  Nag until your child starts working. New way:  Set up a no-nonsense routine.

“Make it clear that everyone has obligations — and your child’s include things like going to school, working with her teacher, and doing the best she can on her homework,” says Susan Kuczmarski, Ed.D, author of The Sacred Flight of the Teenager: A Parent’s Guide to Stepping Back and Letting Go.

Doing her best includes buckling down to finish her assignments without constant check-ins from you. Together, figure out a specific time and place for her to work. It’s okay if she needs a little while to recharge after school before starting, but be sure she knows that four o’clock (or whatever time is best for your fam) is non-negotiable.

Once you’ve established a firm homework routine, make it a habit that happens every day. “Kids can whine, but they just won’t get to watch their TV show or whatever else they’d like to do until the homework is done. Period,” says Dr. Liss. (There goes your need to nag!)

And if your kid doesn’t do an assignment because you failed to remind her? As tough as it is, let her deal with the consequences. You won’t always be around to stay on top of her, and learning responsibility is a cornerstone of education.

Old way:  Lecture your kid for waiting until the night before to study for the spelling test. New way:  Teach time-management skills.

Scolding just makes your child feel bad (and he’ll tune you out, anyway). But because kids appreciate structure, teach yours how to break tasks up into more manageable chunks.

A printed calendar is a great tool for learning how to map out deadlines and a better visual reminder for grade-schoolers than the digital kind. Hang it in a prominent place. Then help your kid set daily goals, like “study four words on Monday and five on Tuesday …,” or break that science project into weekly goals, like “gather resources by the 5th, plant the seeds on the 11th.”

By giving your child control over deadlines, you remove yourself from the battle: If it’s on the calendar, he’s responsible for it. Skip handing out negative consequences for not getting things done. Instead, says Dr. Liss, you can offer him rewards for hitting each of the milestones.

Old way:  Get sucked into whine fests. New way:  Walk away.

If your child gripes about the work itself (“It’s too hard!” or “I don’t get it!”), figure out what’s behind her frustration. If it’s a lack of motivation, let her know that the sooner she applies herself, the sooner it’ll get done and the faster she can move on to something more fun. Then leave the room. After all, without an audience, she can’t complain, and you avoid getting trapped in a negative cycle.

But if the material is too difficult, that’s another story. In that case, try your hand at doing some of the problems with her (as long as you can stay calm). You may be able to make that lightbulb turn on in her head.

If not, reach out to the teacher to ask for assistance (or, if your child is over 8, suggest she speak with the teacher herself). Educators don’t want their students struggling to the point of tears, so your child’s teacher will probably be happy to clue you in to extra resources that can help your kid understand the lesson.

Old way:  Work on your kid’s project until the end product is perfect. New way:  Let your child take the lead.

“We assign projects so kids get a chance to apply new skills they’ve learned,” Cross explains. So if you’re getting super hands-on to wow the teacher, do your best to resist the urge. “We see your child every day, so we’re pretty familiar with the kind of work she does!” Cross adds.

That doesn’t mean you can’t pitch in, but let your kid be the creative force. For example, if you notice that the assignment includes a timeline and your grade-schooler skipped that step, point it out, then let her figure out which dates to include and how best to showcase them. After all, brainstorming lets your child hone her problem-solving skills and increases her confidence; hand-feeding her a solution won’t teach her anything.

When your kiddo proudly shows you the finished product, tell her something specific, like “Your report really makes me want to read that book now!” or “Wow, look at all the details you included in that flower diagram!” By saying something descriptive instead of generic (“That poster you made looks really awesome!”), you’re acknowledging the content itself and the effort your child put into it rather than just how it looks, notes Dr. Kuczmarski.

Achieving balance is key — and that’s true for all homework conundrums. Says Dr. Liss: “Your goal is to find that sweet spot of being there if your kids need you, but not being totally on top of them all the time.”

Plus: 10 Homework Help Tips The Do's and Don'ts of Homework Help

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An Age-By-Age Guide to Helping Kids Manage Homework

Do you ever wonder whether homework is gauging the child’s ability to complete assignments or the parent’s? On one end of the spectrum, a parent might never mention homework and assume it gets done independently; on the other end are the parents who micromanage to be sure every worksheet is absolutely perfect.

Being too laissez faire about homework might deny a child the support they need to develop executive functioning skills, but being too involved could stifle their independence. So how much parent participation in homework is actually appropriate throughout a child’s education?

Basic homework tips

According to Scholastic , you should follow these rules of thumb to support your child during homework (without going overboard):

Stay nearby and available for questions without getting right in the middle of homework.

Avoid the urge to correct mistakes unless your child asks for help.

Instead of nagging, set up a homework routine with a dedicated time and place.

Teach time management for a larger project by helping them break it into chunks.

Child psychologist Dr. Emily W. King recently wrote about rethinking homework in her newsletter. King explains at what ages kids are typically able to do homework independently, but she writes that each child’s ability to concentrate at the end of the day and use executive functioning skills for completing tasks is very individual. I talked to her for more information on how much parental involvement in homework completion is needed, according to a child’s age and grade level.

Kindergarten to second grade

Whether children even need homework this early is a hot debate. Little ones are still developing fine motor skills and their ability to sit still and pay attention at this age.

“If a child is given homework before their brain and body are able to sit and focus independently, then we are relying on the parent or other caregivers to sit with the child to help them focus,” King said. “ Think about when the child is able to sit and focus on non-academic tasks like dinner, art, or music lessons. This will help you tease out executive functioning skills from academic understanding.”

Elementary-age children need time for unstructured play and structured play like music, arts, and sports. They need outside time, free time, and quiet time, King said. For children who are not ready for independent work, nightly reading with another family member is enough “homework,” she said.

Third to fifth grades

Many children will be able to do homework independently in grades 3-5. Even then, their ability to focus and follow through may vary from day to day.

“Most children are ready for practicing independent work between third and fifth grade, but maybe not yet in the after-school hours when they are tired and want to rest or play. We need to begin exposing children to organization and structure independently in late elementary school to prepare them for more independence in middle school,” King said.

Neurodivergent kids may need more parental support for several years before they work independently.

“Neurodivergent children, many of whom have executive functioning weaknesses, are not ready to work independently in elementary school. Children without executive functioning weaknesses (e.g., the ability to remain seated and attend to a task independently) are able to do this somewhere between third and fifth grade, but it’s very possible they can work independently at school but be too tired to do it later in the afternoon,” King said. “We need to follow the child’s skills and give them practice to work independently when they seem ready. Of course, if a child wants to do extra work after school due to an interest, go for it.”

For students who are not ready to work independently in middle school, it is better to reduce the amount of homework they are expected to complete so they can practice independence and feel successful.

Middle school

In sixth grade and later, kids are really developing executive functioning skills like planning, organizing, paying attention, initiating, shifting focus, and execution. They will still need your encouragement to keep track of assignments, plan their time, and stick to a homework routine.

“Middle school students need lots of organization support and putting systems in place to help them keep track of assignments, due dates, and materials,” King said.

High school

By this point, congratulations: You can probably be pretty hands-off with homework. Remain open and available if your teen needs help negotiating a problem, but executing plans should be up to them now.

“In high school, parents are working to put themselves out of a job and begin stepping back as children take the lead on homework. Parents of high schoolers are ‘homework consultants,’” King said. “We are there to help solve problems, talk through what to say in an email to a teacher, but we are not writing the emails or talking to the teachers for our kids.”

What if homework is not working for them (or you)

There are a number of reasons a child might not be managing homework at the same level as their peers, including academic anxiety and learning disabilities.

If your child is showing emotional distress at homework time, it might be a sign that they have run out of gas from the structure, socialization, and stimulation they have already been through at school that day. One way to support kids is to teach them how to have a healthy balance of work and play time.

“When we ask students to keep working after school when their tank is on empty, we likely damage their love of learning and fill them with dread for tomorrow,” King wrote in her newsletter.

King said in her experience as a child psychologist, the amount of homework support a child needs is determined by their individual abilities and skills more than their age or grade level.

“All of these steps vary for a neurodivergent child and we are not following these guidelines by age or grade but rather by their level of skills development to become more independent,” she said. “In order to independently complete homework, a child must be able to have attended to the directions in class, brought the materials home, remember to get the materials out at home, remember to begin the task, understand the task, remain seated and attention long enough to complete the task, be able to complete the task, return the work to their backpack, and return the work to the teacher. If any of these skills are weak or the child is not able to do these independently, there will be a breakdown in the system of homework. You can see why young students and neurodivergent students would struggle with this process.”

If you and your child have trouble meeting homework expectations, talk to their teacher about what could be contributing to the problem and how to modify expectations for them.

“Get curious about your child’s skill level at that time of day,” King said. “Are they able to work independently at school but not at home? Are they not able to work independently any time of day? Are they struggling with this concept at school, too? When are they successful?”

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The Value of Parents Helping with Homework

Dr. selena kiser.

• September 2, 2020

The importance of parents helping with homework is invaluable. Helping with homework is an important responsibility as a parent and directly supports the learning process. Parents’ experience and expertise is priceless. One of the best predictors of success in school is learning at home and being involved in children’s education. Parental involvement with homework helps develop self-confidence and motivation in the classroom. Parents helping students with homework has a multitude of benefits including spending individual time with children, enlightening strengths and weaknesses, making learning more meaningful, and having higher aspirations.

How Parental Involvement with Homework Impacts Students

Parental involvement with homework impacts students in a positive way. One of the most important reasons for parental involvement is that it helps alleviate stress and anxiety if the students are facing challenges with specific skills or topics. Parents have experience and expertise with a variety of subject matter and life experiences to help increase relevance. Parents help their children understand content and make it more meaningful, while also helping them understand things more clearly.

Also, their involvement increases skill and subject retention. Parents get into more depth about content and allow students to take skills to a greater level. Many children will always remember the times spent together working on homework or classroom projects. Parental involvement with homework and engagement in their child’s education are related to higher academic performance, better social skills and behavior, and increased self-confidence.

Parents helping with homework allows more time to expand upon subjects or skills since learning can be accelerated in the classroom. This is especially true in today’s classrooms. The curricula in many classrooms is enhanced and requires teaching a lot of content in a small amount of time. Homework is when parents and children can spend extra time on skills and subject matter. Parents provide relatable reasons for learning skills, and children retain information in greater depth.

Parental involvement increases creativity and induces critical-thinking skills in children. This creates a positive learning environment at home and transfers into the classroom setting. Parents have perspective on their children, and this allows them to support their weaknesses while expanding upon their strengths. The time together enlightens parents as to exactly what their child’s strengths and weaknesses are.

Virtual learning is now utilized nationwide, and parents are directly involved with their child’s schoolwork and homework. Their involvement is more vital now than ever. Fostering a positive homework environment is critical in virtual learning and assists children with technological and academic material.

Strategies for Including Parents in Homework

An essential strategy for including parents in homework is sharing a responsibility to help children meet educational goals. Parents’ commitment to prioritizing their child’s educational goals, and participating in homework supports a larger objective. Teachers and parents are specific about the goals and work directly with the child with classwork and homework. Teachers and parents collaboratively working together on children’s goals have larger and more long-lasting success. This also allows parents to be strategic with homework assistance.

A few other great examples of how to involve parents in homework are conducting experiments, assignments, or project-based learning activities that parents play an active role in. Interviewing parents is a fantastic way to be directly involved in homework and allows the project to be enjoyable. Parents are honored to be interviewed, and these activities create a bond between parents and children. Students will remember these assignments for the rest of their lives.

Project-based learning activities examples are family tree projects, leaf collections, research papers, and a myriad of other hands-on learning assignments. Children love working with their parents on these assignments as they are enjoyable and fun. This type of learning and engagement also fosters other interests. Conducting research is another way parents directly impact their child’s homework. This can be a subject the child is interested in or something they are unfamiliar with. Children and parents look forward to these types of homework activities.

Parents helping students with homework has a multitude of benefits. Parental involvement and engagement have lifelong benefits and creates a pathway for success. Parents provide autonomy and support, while modeling successful homework study habits.

• #homework , #ParentalInvolvement

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Why Should Parents Help with Homework: 7 Strong Reasons

Newborns, infants, and toddlers indisputably require their parents’ attention and assistance. They learn how to eat, walk, do simple tasks, talk, and solve primitive problems with the help of adults. Parents are their role models. When toddlers become school children, parents start doubting the necessity of their participation in all activities of their kids. They could help their children do some projects for their kindergartens. What about school years? Should parents help their kids do homework? How to do it right?

7 Useful Things Parents Can Do to Help Their Children Do Homework

Many parents believe that to help with homework means to do it instead of a child. Moms and dads are sure that their presence will not let a child become an independent and problem-solving individual.

In fact, the role of parents in homework help is a bit different. A team of online assignment experts who provide students with homework help name seven reasons that prove how significant parents’ assistance can be.

Strong motivation

Sometimes, teachers cannot find an approach for students and motivate them to learn their subject. Parents, in this case, have a stronger influence on their offspring. They know what interests their children and what to do to make them do STEM projects, perform an assignment, or read a book. Motivators can be different. 

The most popular are the following:

• spending more time with friends
• a tour to some country during the summer holidays
• the desired present on Christmas or Birthday
• all-inclusive shopping days

Besides, successful parents automatically become an example of good results in education. Due to such collaboration, parents and children will get to know each other. Moms and dads will know what challenges their kids face and perhaps, can think of hiring helpers or downloading apps to help students master a subject.   

Time management

Students, especially in primary school, are bad time managers. They do not notice the time flow and cannot balance it rationally. Parents can learn their schedules and consider after-class activities.

Adults are better at creating daily timetables. In a couple of days, they know how many minutes their kids need to do homework in STEM disciplines, Literature, Languages, etc. 

Parents work as notifications who remind of work and rest times. Besides, they control their child’s homework performance and prevent procrastination.

So, school children and college students are able to do everything on time, cope with deadlines, participate in after-class activities (clubs, organizations), and have enough time for fun.

Plan assignment performance

Each assignment needs thorough and well-thought planning. Specialists at the homework help service assert the value of outlining because it informs a learner about tasks required for a concrete assignment. For example, a STEM project involves the search for ideas, tools for its realization, research for the theory check, description of each stage, and conclusion.

It will be hard for a student to do that alone. The pandemic world made most of them stay at home being isolated from group mates. Parents might become their helpers who will assist in project budgeting, creation, testing, and description. 

Positive attitude to homework

Home is usually associated with coziness and a positive atmosphere. Parents should do their best to provide a comfortable learning environment.

Besides, it is necessary to encourage students and show a personal positive attitude to knowledge acquisition. When parents are indifferent or they help with homework when always in a low mood, children will develop a correlation “homework = something gloomy and unnecessary”. 

Better preparation for tests and exams

Students are often sure that they do not require revisions and practicing. Parents might interview their kids regarding some topic.

They can ask questions; look for tests on the Internet, and search for online simulators or apps to check their kids’ subject awareness. Such preparation for college exams and tests always manifests in positive results.

The main thing is not to overdo it. One person cannot be an expert in all disciplines. The score of home-performed testing should be close to those that learners get at school, college, or university.

If a student feels depressed about some subject, it will be a great idea to find online assignment help specialists. They are educated experts and are aware of tips and tricks that let students comprehend difficult aspects of STEM disciplines.

Positive oral speech development

Online helpers recommend reading the ready research paper or essay aloud to parents, friends, or relatives. Their job is to listen and express their viewpoint and considerations. This method helps to proofread the paper carefully and notice obvious mistakes. Besides, kids learn to speak in public with the required intonation and articulation. 

Healthy learning habits

“Switch off your phone”, “Listen to my instructions once again attentively”, or “Do you have everything required at your fingertips?” are the most common things children hear from their homework helpers. Consequently, parents create healthy learning traditions that include such essential habits as

• active and attentive listening,
• attention to detail,
• learning without distractions (mobile talks, notifications, noize, etc.),
• self-organization and control (having pens, pencils, chargers, WiFi, and other necessary tools within reach),
• time-management,
• no task delaying,
• prevention of burnouts due to no fuss and accumulation of undone assignments.

What Parents Should NOT Do When Being Homework Helpers 

Parents must help their children, but sometimes they turn their assistance into daily torture and become toxic. What should parents not do to make their assistance effective?

First off, they are not to yell at kids who cannot understand something. It usually happens to those who either do not understand the assignment themselves or who know too much and cannot stand their offspring’s ignorance.

Second, a bad mood and exhaustion make people irritable and aggressive. So, one should stay aside when experiencing the worst times.

Third, no fuss. It is better not to help than to do it anyhow.

Parents who cannot control their emotions and might become toxic should hire homework helpers. They have the corresponding education and pick up words and samples to explain the material effectively. It is better to entrust this job to specialists than to spoil relations with a child and lead to poor learning results.

Happy Parenting!

Divya is a writer, who loves to read and write. She is a Company Secretary by profession. She is passionate about art, reading, writing, music, and creativity. She loves to do research on ‘Parenting’ and discover new things now and then. Her passion about positive parenting pushed her to write on ‘Wonder Parenting’. Her loving daughter, Vachie, helped her to dig deep and reach new heights on Parenting. She believes that ‘Parenting is Patience’ and shares her own journey to express that parenting approach differs for every individual. Simple Living High Parenting!

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Editor’s Pick

Should parents help their kids with homework?

Assistant Professor of Educational Leadership and Policy Studies, University of Oklahoma

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Daniel Hamlin does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.

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Schools across the country encourage parents to help their children with homework.

Parents are listening. Helping with homework is one of the most common things that parents say they do to support their children’s learning.

Many experts have found that helping with homework cultivates positive learning behaviors , reinforces class material and signals to children that their education is important. The federal Department of Education says that parents play an important role in their children’s learning when they help with homework.

Yet parents often hear through the media that helping with homework may not be worth it. After seeing headlines such as “ Why It’s So Important You Never Help Your Kids With Their Homework ” and “ Don’t Help Your Kids With Their Homework ,” moms, dads and other caregivers can be left wondering whether they should even bother.

I’m a professor of education policy. Together with sociologist Angran Li , I set out to make sense of this conflicting guidance.

Cause or consequence?

The basis for claims that parental help with homework can be bad for students comes from research examining national surveys . These studies find that frequent homework help from parents is associated with lower test scores .

But this finding does not necessarily mean that moms and dads do harm when they help with homework. When children are struggling in school, parents may step in to help more often. That is, frequent homework help from parents might not be the cause of problems, but rather, coincide with them.

My colleague and I wanted to see if this was the case.

To find out, we studied data from an important nationally representative survey administered by the federal government – the Early Childhood Longitudinal Study . We found that low-achieving children were far more likely to receive frequent homework from parents.

And importantly, after we factored in children’s achievement levels, help with homework from parents was no longer associated with lower test scores.

Other considerations

While this finding was insightful, we figured that the effect of homework help from parents on student achievement might also be influenced by many other characteristics.

So we used a statistical technique that would account for many overlapping factors, such as how well parents and their children get along, the number of siblings, and behavior at school.

Our results also indicated that children with low test scores benefited the most when their parents frequently helped with homework.

In other words, calls for all parents to stop helping with homework could end up hurting some children.

In addition, one common concern is that only affluent and highly educated parents have the time and resources to help their children with homework regularly. We find little evidence to support this presumption. On national surveys , low-income and minority families report helping their children with homework frequently. And this was also true in our study.

Quality counts

It is important to point out that our study looked at the frequency of homework help from parents. However, evidence suggests that the quality of homework help also matters. Parents can make a difference through warm encouragement and a positive outlook and by communicating high expectations to children.

The effectiveness of homework help also seems to increase when parents foster independent learning behaviors . When helping with homework, parents should avoid trying to control the process and should also resist the temptation to complete assignments for their kids . Instead, they should let their children figure out answers on their own while offering helpful hints and positive feedback as needed.

Although parents should always consider their child’s individual learning needs, researchers say that parents should gradually reduce homework help as their children grow older, probably phasing out direct assistance with homework by the time their children reach high school. Parents can also seek advice from teachers and other school staff on how to make homework support engaging and attuned to their child’s learning needs.

Blanket statements about whether homework help is simply good or bad can be misleading. Under the right circumstances, parents can help their kids learn more when they help with homework.

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Hey, Parents of K–5 Kids: Hands Off the Homework!

If they don’t ask for help, you don’t need to offer..

The beginning of a new school year can be stressful for kids and parents alike. But one thing parents of elementary-school kids shouldn’t have to stress over is supervising homework daily, because we now have evidence that such supervision actually may not have a positive impact on children’s academic achievement.

While there is an ongoing debate among educators whether homework is generally beneficial in elementary school, in my view, it depends on the nature of the work assigned. Developmentally appropriate homework on relevant material that can be done by the child independently (without need of adult supervision) is, I think, contributing to formation of habits that will serve the child well as they move through their education journey. The “10 minutes per grade” rule seems like a reasonable practice (so that a second grader, for example, might be asked to read for 20 minutes a day).

That question of “adult supervision” is where my new research comes in. We know parental help with homework has been long hailed by educators and policymakers as an effective mechanism to help children succeed, but having studied parenting practices as a sociologist of education and childhood for over two decades, I questioned whether data actually supported this widely held claim. As it turns out, my recent research, conducted at Penn State, suggests that parents could be wasting their time.

My study, using two nationally representative datasets that each tracked about 20,000 kids from kindergarten through fifth grade, showed no benefits of parental help with homework. In other words, we found no statistically significant association between parental help with homework, as measured by level of intensity (from everyday help, to less than once a week) and self-reported during parent interviews at each wave of data collection, and subsequent math and reading achievement. While my research cannot prove the mechanisms by which potential benefits of parental help with homework for this age group are outweighed, my team and I suggested three possible explanations: cognitive loss, adverse effects on home emotional climate, and deferred responsibility.

Under pressure to get homework completed, parents might think they’re helping their kids by offering the correct answers. Research by others, however, suggests that this practice deprives students of the main purpose of homework—to sharpen problem-solving and other skills. This parental intervention may also mask a child’s skills or knowledge gap that would have otherwise been discovered by a teacher.

The daily involvement of parents with a child’s homework has also been associated with a negative effect on the emotional climate of the family. Parents can be more critical than teachers, or they may apply too much pressure, or create an overall stressful situation by being too controlling and intrusive. That kind of parental behavior has been linked in other research to lower academic achievement, whereas supportive involvement has a positive effect.

Parents constantly checking a child’s homework for completion and accuracy may also send a message to the child that the responsibility of finishing homework falls on their parents, and not themselves. Developing a sense of responsibility for completing a task is an important behavior that a child can cultivate through homework.

I’m not suggesting that parents shouldn’t be involved at all in their children’s homework. Parents can enhance their children’s learning experience at home by providing a living space conducive to learning (a quiet atmosphere, free from distractions), and conveying a clear message about the importance of education—this is what other researchers have labeled “ stage setting ”. And it’s important for the child to know that if they really struggle, there is an adult who can help. But the help shouldn’t be provided automatically or imposed.

Parents can also redirect the time they would have spent fighting with kids over homework into more beneficial activities that boost kids’ emotional development, which has been shown to positively impact their future academic success, such as calm and positive conversations about school and their friends, what they enjoy in classes, and their academic goals. When parents develop warm, close relationships with their children, conveying the importance of doing well in school becomes a natural part of conversation, without being perceived as putting pressure on the child or “lecturing.”

Parental support is crucially important for children’s developing sense of self, as well as building their confidence to achieve various goals. Equally effective is encouraging your child to put forward their best effort, as opposed to achieving a certain defined outcome, such as being a straight A student.

Parents are misplacing their energy when they help their kids with homework. My research, which controls for the variety of family and parental characteristics, including income and education level of the parent, family structure and the child’s achievement, challenges widely accepted guidance , including some from the U.S. Department of Education, that promotes homework as “an opportunity for families to be involved in their children’s education.” I think it may, instead, be causing unnecessary stress to kids and parents alike.

As your elementary-aged children bring their homework home with them this fall, resist the temptation to get too involved. Allow them space to struggle and work through problems on their own, even if that means they won’t always come to the correct conclusions. Taking a small hit on an insignificant assignment now may set your child up for even greater success in the future.

Top 10 Ways Parents Can Help with Homework

Provide a Suitable Environment and Materials

Designate a Space for Each Child

Establish a Schedule

Make Homework Time Tech-Free

Be Ready to Be a Resource

Don't Give the Answers

Use an Assignment Book

Connect with the Teacher and School

Review Graded Work and Mistakes

Keep Up Healthy Habits

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Parents and Homework: Should Parents Help with Homework?

Homework—like yellow buses and lockers—is a hallmark of the American school system. On average, teachers assign third graders 30 minutes and seventh graders 70 minutes of homework every night . Parents who help their kids with their school assignments may save them some time and ensure they’re doing the work. But do moms and dads help or hinder their child’s progress at school if they offer too much help?

Parents—Put Those Pens Down!

Most parents want to do all they can to prime their kids for future success. Researchers from University of Texas at Austin and Duke University, however, discovered that once children start middle school, parental help with homework might lower test scores . The reason: parents might have forgotten about the topics their kids learn in school—or never really understood them in the first place.

“Parents tend to take the reins of how they’re going to help with homework without consulting the child,” says Keith Robinson , assistant professor of sociology at the University of Texas and one of the researchers of the study. “So maybe parents could ask kids, ‘Is what I’m doing helping you?'”

On the other hand, some educators believe that children should complete their homework themselves. They say this will give children more independence , reduce homework-related arguments, and provide parents with more free time.

When Parental Help with Homework Is Helpful

There are still benefits for kids whose parents provide homework help. “It can, for example, provide opportunities for parents to see what their children are learning in school and help families communicate with their children and school staff,” according to The Department of Education . Parents can also set a regular time and place for assignments, limit distractions, take an interest in what their child is learning, and provide resources and supplies.

Other research suggests that kids spend more time on their homework when they receive help from their parents , particularly when it comes to math and social studies. Moreover, children consistently complete their homework when their parents are involved in their education.

How Much Help Is Too Much?

How parents help their children with homework is important. “Don’t complete your child’s assignments for them; ask them to think critically about how they can solve their problems,” says Project Appleseed , an organization that promotes public school improvement. “Feel free to re-explain concepts that they might have learned recently in school, but also encourage your children to look up information in their textbooks or solve a problem themselves.”

So, how involved should parents get? Should parents tell their kids the answer to a problem? Or let them work it out themselves? “Too much help can mean, in the short term, that the day’s lesson is not reinforced, which is the point of homework,” says Laureen Miles Brunelli , writing for The Spruce . “In the long term, if parents are overseeing homework too much, kids won’t learn the organizational skills they need. They can become disconnected from understanding their responsibilities when it comes to homework.” Still, a British study found that one in four parents actually do all of their child’s homework for them, believing that they simply have too much homework to handle.

Calling all parents! Do you help your child with their homework? Do you think parental help with homework influences test scores? Leave a comment below and share your views!

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Homework Help: 15 Ways to Support Your Child

Table of Contents

1. Understand the reason for homework

Homework reinforces what is being taught in the classroom and teaches students important life skills – responsibility, time management and task completion. Children should be able to complete the work with little help from parents, and they shouldn’t come home with an entirely new concept to learn. Homework should be practice or an extension of what they’ve already learned.

2. Know the teacher’s philosophy

Teachers have different philosophies about how much homework to assign. Some think piling on a ton of homework helps build character. Others think children have done enough work during the day and don’t assign any. Understand where your child’s teacher falls on the homework spectrum  so you are not surprised as the homework does (or doesn’t) come home. If you are unsure what a reasonable amount of homework is, The National Education Association and The National Parent Teacher Association recommend 10-20 minutes of homework per night in the first grade, and an additional 10 minutes per grade after that.

3. Learn the homework rules

At Open House, learn the homework policy of the school and your child’s teacher. What are the consequences for lost or forgotten homework? Don’t be quick to bail out your child every time you get a frantic text message about forgotten homework. One of the purposes of homework is to teach responsibility.

4. Get organized

Your child should have a backpack and homework folder to carry assignments between home and school. Teachers of primary students usually send homework correspondence each night. If your older child’s teacher doesn’t require students to record school work in an assignment book, provide one yourself and teach your child how to fill it out.

5. Schedule a consistent time

With sports, service projects, church and community activities, it can be hard to schedule one set time every day to do homework. Aim for as much consistency as possible when scheduling homework around after-school activities.

6. Designate a study space

Pick a space free from distractions. However, consider your child’s personality and ability to focus when selecting a homework station. Some children concentrate best in complete quiet at the kitchen table or a desk. Others study well on their bed with background music. Reading areas can be creative like a reading tent or bean bag. Keep study areas free from video games, television and the games of siblings who finish homework early.

7. Create a supply caddy

Fill a plastic caddy or bin organizer with items your child might need for homework. Some good  supplies are pencils, markers, crayons, glue, tape, stapler, three-hole punch, paper clips, notebook paper, art paper, graph paper, calculator, protractor, compass, ruler and a dictionary/thesaurus combo. Also provide a wipe-off calendar for important due dates.

8. Be available, but don’t do the work

Helping your child is a great way to connect with them, but don’t spoon feed answers. The whole point of homework is for children to practice skills independently.

9. Use a timer if necessary

Sometimes children like to procrastinate. Some children like the challenge of beating the clock. Either way, a timer keeps a child focused on the finish line.

10. Keep a resource bookshelf

Can’t remember what a gerund is? Are you a little rusty on what the terms perpendicular and parallel mean? Keep an assortment of reference books or save online references to your Favorites list on your computer. A good math dictionary for parents of elementary students is “Math Dictionary: Homework Help for Families” by Judith de Klerk. Another great resource is the “Everything You Need to Know About Homework Series Set” by Anne Zeman and Kate Kelly.

11. Create a phone chain

How many times has your child left their spelling words at school or forgotten a lesson? Help your child make a list of friends they can call or get to know other parents in your child’s class so you can have a phone chain to get answers about assignments.

12. Model learning as a priority

Let your child see you reading the newspaper or books. Discuss current events, politics or the new art or history museum you want to visit. Find exciting tidbits in their homework lessons and research them. Show by example that learning is fun.

13. Encourage

No matter how tired you are, have a positive attitude about the work your child is doing. Encourage their efforts and let them know you are proud of them.

Homework rewards don’t have to be elaborate, although you may want to up the ante for a struggling child or one who is hard to motivate. A reward can be as simple as a fun activity when they finish. But you can also keep a homework incentive chart and let your child earn a special activity with mom or dad, some extra screen time or a dinner out.

15. Don’t be afraid to speak up

If you think too much homework is coming home, that your child isn’t familiar with the material or that they are struggling, schedule a conference with your child’s teacher. Most teachers welcome feedback and want your child to succeed.

Websites that help with homework

• Dictionary.com and Thesaurus.com : This website is a dual tool to help students define words and find synonyms.
• Quizlet.com : Provides study tools like flashcards, games and study sets. Make your own or choose from their library of topics.
• Scholastic Parents : Offering a variety of educational resources including homework help, learning toolkits, learning strategies and more.
• Factmonster.com : Find facts on a variety of school subjects and play educational games. Also has a dictionary, encyclopedia, thesaurus, atlas, almanac, and timelines.
• Khanacademy.com : Includes online courses, lessons and practice in a variety of subjects for students in kindergarten through high school. Also includes test prep and information about college and careers.

Apps that help with homework

• Dictionary.com : This app works just like a print dictionary without taking up desk space.
• My GradeBook : Students or parents can keep track of grades with this app.
• StudyBlue : Provides tools including flashcards, notes and study guides.
• Tinycards : This flashcard app helps with memorization.
• Meta Calculator : A graphing, scientific, matrix and statistics calculator app, this will help in those challenging upper level math classes.

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How Parents Can Help With Homework (Without Doing All The Work)

• June 7, 2017

If you’re the parent of a school-aged child, then it’s likely that you have encountered homework. It’s also likely that you have wondered about how much you should be helping.

While many parents have their opinions on this issue, it’s important to consider the pros and cons from the student’s point of view.

Should parents help with homework?  The answer may not be so simple.

Parental involvement in homework

Studies show that children who spend more time on homework get better grades (on average) than those who spend less time. Parents who play an active role in homework are putting their kids in the best position to succeed.

Though expert opinions vary, most educators can agree that parents should help with homework to some degree. Your role as a parent is to reinforce the learning process happening when your child does his or her homework. This means keeping your child on task as well as providing motivation and guidance.

How much help is too much?

Where parents often go wrong is they can become too involved, helping more than needed. Providing answers or completing projects for your child  may end up hurting in the long run because it can prevent the child from developing an understanding of the subject.

By doing the work for your child, you aren’t empowering him or her to work toward learning goals. Students who get this type of help from their parents often end up getting lower grades because they don’t get the opportunity to learn the material. This causes them to perform poorly in the actual classroom. It can also set a poor precedent for success later in life.

Helping without hurting

Most studies are clear about limiting parental involvement to helping with organization, time management, and creating a positive learning environment. This means giving your child a place to work, limiting distractions, and providing supplies like pencils, pens, and paper. It also means guiding your child toward answers when he or she has questions – without answering it for him or her.

How should parents help with homework?

These tips will help keep you involved without doing your child’s homework yourself.

• Set a regular schedule for completing homework.
• Establish a dedicated homework space.
• Make sure this place has the supplies and resources the child may need.
• Provide guidance, but not answers.
• Help your child manage his or her time. Keep him or her on task.
• Keep the environment pressure free. Don’t tell your child to finish by dinnertime.
• Learn how your child learns. If he or she is a visual learner, use flashcards. For auditory learners, talk aloud about the topic.
• Encourage autonomy. Help your child learn to help themselves.

The key to helping without hurting is to provide direction and encouragement. The goal should always be to motivate your child to want to find the answers him or herself. This will help your child build the skills needed for success in the classroom – and beyond.

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How to Deal with Homework Frustration As a Parent

Last Updated: June 22, 2022

This article was co-authored by Trudi Griffin, LPC, MS . Trudi Griffin is a Licensed Professional Counselor in Wisconsin specializing in Addictions and Mental Health. She provides therapy to people who struggle with addictions, mental health, and trauma in community health settings and private practice. She received her MS in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from Marquette University in 2011. This article has been viewed 7,627 times.

When your child struggles with their homework, they may become frustrated or upset. In turn, this may cause them to act out, and you may wind up frustrated yourself. Fortunately, there are ways you can help your child calm down when they begin to become agitated. There are also strategies you can use to help them work through challenging assignments, and to help ensure homework sessions go more smoothly moving forward.

Overcoming Homework Frustration Together

• Instead of becoming frustrated yourself, try talking to your child calmly. Start with a brief, sympathetic statement. For instance, say “I’m sorry your homework is stressful today,” or “I know it can be frustrating when an assignment is hard to understand.”
• Then, let your child know that there is more than just one way to accomplish a task and that you will help them to find a way that will work for them. Say something like, “There is a way for you to get this done that will be less frustrating and I will help you figure it out.”

• Direct them to breathe in through their nose deeply and slowly for five seconds, and then release slowly through their mouth.
• If you do lose your temper and shout at your child, apologize to them and remind yourself they need your help.
• Once everyone is relaxed again, say something like, “Alright let’s have a look at this homework together.”

• Listen to your child's response and respond with a way they can handle a similar situation differently in the future.
• For instance, if they say, "I got mad because it was too hard," point out that they were able to complete the assignment, and had just gotten stuck on one problem. Then say, "Next time, you know you can always ask me or your teacher about parts of your assignment that don't make sense, right?"

• Furthermore, anticipate and accept the fact that you will likely have a verbal battle about homework at one point or another.
• If you find yourself getting frustrated when your child struggles with homework, take a moment afterwards to reflect. In particular, remind yourself that growing up involves plenty of challenges for children, and that your patient support will help them immeasurably. It is very important to work through challenges with your child rather than expecting them to figure it out on their own.

Helping Your Child Work on Their Homework

• If they are not clearly able to explain the assignment, look it over yourself and see if it makes sense to you.
• If you are able to understand the assignment, help them get started - but only enough to ensure they understand what they need to do. Then allow them to finish the assignment themselves.
• Talk with your child’s teachers about the assignments and encourage your child to talk to their teachers when they don’t understand something. Let your child know that their teachers are there to help them.

• For instance, correct your child when they something like, “You’re wrong!” by saying, “It’s okay to think that I’m wrong, but try saying it differently.”
• Offer them examples too, such as “Mom, I don’t think that’s how I’m supposed to do it.”
• If your child starts to berate themselves, then correct them. For example, if your child says something like, “I am so stupid! I am never going to understand this!” reframe it by saying, “You are smart and you can figure this out.”

• For instance, maybe a grandparent can help more peacefully.
• Alternatively, consider searching for an older student to help tutor your child after school. Your child’s school may be able to help facilitate this arrangement.

• If you think the homework your child is bringing home may be too challenging for them or for students their age, don't hesitate to mention this to their teacher.
• If your child's teacher is not receptive to your input or does not provide adequate responses to your questions, speak with an administrator at the school about any unresolved concerns you have.

Encouraging Good Homework Habits

• A half an hour will often be more than enough for grade school children, while an hour may be better for middle and high school aged kids.
• Early evening is usually ideal. Avoid asking your child to do their homework right after school, unless this works for them. Some kids do better with homework on an empty stomach, while others may need to eat a meal and wait a bit before they can focus.
• Make sure to give your child a chance to relax and decompress after school before they get into their homework. For example, you might make your child a snack and let them play a game or play outside for about 30 minutes to an hour before starting their homework.

• Avoid watching television or messing around on your phone while your child is working. Not only are these potentially distracting, they may also seem unfair to your child.
• Set up a workspace for your child that is free of distractions. For example, you could clear the kitchen or dining room table so that your child can complete their homework there.

• Favor language that praises their effort, as opposed to their ability. For instance, say things like, “I can see you’re working very hard on your homework. Good job!”

Expert Q&A

You might also like.

• ↑ http://www.pbs.org/parents/education/going-to-school/supporting-your-learner/struggling-academically/
• ↑ http://www.greatschools.org/gk/articles/deal-with-homework/
• ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/pride-and-joy/201209/battles-over-homework-advice-parents
• ↑ https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/help-teen-homework.html?WT.ac=en-p-homework-help-a#

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August 29, 2019

Should parents help their kids with homework?

by Daniel Hamlin, The Conversation

Schools across the country encourage parents to help their children with homework.

Parents are listening. Helping with homework is one of the most common things that parents say they do to support their children's learning.

Many experts have found that helping with homework cultivates positive learning behaviors , reinforces class material and signals to children that their education is important. The federal Department of Education says that parents play an important role in their children's learning when they help with homework.

Yet parents often hear through the media that helping with homework may not be worth it. After seeing headlines such as " Why It's So Important You Never Help Your Kids With Their Homework " and " Don't Help Your Kids With Their Homework ," moms, dads and other caregivers can be left wondering whether they should even bother.

I'm a professor of education policy. Together with sociologist Angran Li , I set out to make sense of this conflicting guidance.

Cause or consequence?

The basis for claims that parental help with homework can be bad for students comes from research examining national surveys . These studies find that frequent homework help from parents is associated with lower test scores .

But this finding does not necessarily mean that moms and dads do harm when they help with homework. When children are struggling in school, parents may step in to help more often. That is, frequent homework help from parents might not be the cause of problems, but rather, coincide with them.

My colleague and I wanted to see if this was the case.

To find out, we studied data from an important nationally representative survey administered by the federal government —the Early Childhood Longitudinal Study . We found that low-achieving children were far more likely to receive frequent homework from parents.

And importantly, after we factored in children's achievement levels, help with homework from parents was no longer associated with lower test scores.

Other considerations

While this finding was insightful, we figured that the effect of homework help from parents on student achievement might also be influenced by many other characteristics.

So we used a statistical technique that would account for many overlapping factors, such as how well parents and their children get along, the number of siblings, and behavior at school.

Our results also indicated that children with low test scores benefited the most when their parents frequently helped with homework.

In other words, calls for all parents to stop helping with homework could end up hurting some children.

In addition, one common concern is that only affluent and highly educated parents have the time and resources to help their children with homework regularly. We find little evidence to support this presumption. On national surveys , low-income and minority families report helping their children with homework frequently. And this was also true in our study.

Quality counts

It is important to point out that our study looked at the frequency of homework help from parents. However, evidence suggests that the quality of homework help also matters. Parents can make a difference through warm encouragement and a positive outlook and by communicating high expectations to children.

The effectiveness of homework help also seems to increase when parents foster independent learning behaviors . When helping with homework, parents should avoid trying to control the process and should also resist the temptation to complete assignments for their kids . Instead, they should let their children figure out answers on their own while offering helpful hints and positive feedback as needed.

Although parents should always consider their child's individual learning needs, researchers say that parents should gradually reduce homework help as their children grow older, probably phasing out direct assistance with homework by the time their children reach high school. Parents can also seek advice from teachers and other school staff on how to make homework support engaging and attuned to their child's learning needs.

Blanket statements about whether homework help is simply good or bad can be misleading. Under the right circumstances, parents can help their kids learn more when they help with homework.

Provided by The Conversation

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Tips to Enroll Disabled Dependents and Certify Parent-Child Relationships

Do you know the details of our disabled dependent and parent-child relationship programs?

There are time-sensitive dates and deadlines to meet to keep your loved ones enrolled in your health and dental plans. That’s why we’ve provided the following information and resources.

Certifying Your Disabled Dependent

Can i enroll my disabled dependent who is turning 26 years old.

You may be able to enroll a child as a disabled dependent if they are incapable of self-support due to a mental or physical condition which existed prior to age 26, and continuously since then.

In addition, the child must be enrolled in a CalPERS health and/or dental plan prior to turning age 26. If you are enrolling as a new employee and your disabled dependent is over the age of 26, the dependent must be enrolled during your initial enrollment opportunity as a new employee and continuously thereafter.

How do I enroll my disabled dependent?

Initial certification is your first step.

• For subscribers already enrolled in the CalPERS health program, the request to enroll a disabled dependent must be submitted 90 days before, or up to 60 days after, the dependent turns age 26. New employees have 60 days from their hire date to submit the request to enroll a dependent age 26 or older.
• The subscriber and the dependent’s physician specializing in their disability must complete and submit a Disabled Dependent Member Questionnaire and Medical Report (HBD-34) (PDF) to CalPERS (see exception below for Kaiser Permanente members).

You Must Recertify

• Ninety days prior to the expiration of the disabled dependent’s certification, subscribers are required to submit a new HBD-34 form.
• If you are unable to submit the disabled dependent recertification in a timely manner, your dependent’s coverage will be permanently canceled, and you will be unable to reenroll them. If a disabled dependent over the age of 26 is removed from CalPERS health and/or dental benefits for any reason, the removal is permanent, and they are not eligible for future reinstatement.

Who do I contact for help and to start the process of certifying my disabled dependent?

Where can I find the disabled dependent form to complete?

The Disabled Dependent Member Questionnaire and Medical Report Form (HBD-34) (PDF) and Authorization to Disclose Protected Health Information Form (PDF) can be found on our website, or you can contact your employer or us at 888 CalPERS (or 888 -225-7377). After the initial certification, when it’s time to recertify your dependent, the required forms will be mailed to you 90 days prior to the certification expiration date.

Tips to Prepare Your Documentation

• The physician specializing in the dependent’s disability is to complete all the information in Part B and C on the medical report. The report cannot be completed by a nurse practitioner or other health professional.
• The medical report must be faxed to CalPERS directly from the physician with a fax coversheet. Kaiser members can send the report directly to CalPERS and we will confirm the report with Kaiser.

Certifying a Parent-Child Relationship

What is a parent-child relationship.

A “parent-child relationship” is established when you intentionally assume parental status or duties over a child who is not your adopted, step, or recognized natural child, and meet specific enrollment criteria.

How can I certify a parent-child relationship?

A parent-child relationship can be certified by submitting the Affidavit of Parent-Child Relationship (HBD-40) (PDF) along with supporting financial and residential documentation showing legal parental status or duties/guardianship over the child. For examples of acceptable documents, please review the list available on the Affidavit of Parent-Child Relationship form.

Who do I contact for help and to start the process of adding a parent-child relationship dependent?

Tips on Supporting Documentation

For the initial certification, supporting documents for dependents under 18 can include residential and financial statements. However, in the following year, supporting documentation will require the first page of your most recent federal or state tax return which shows the parent-child dependent as a tax dependent.

Tax-Exempt Members

In lieu of a tax return document, provide proof of tax-exempt documentation along with residential and financial statements.

Newborn Children

Submit hospital bills that include both your and your dependent’s name. In lieu of a birth certificate, you may submit the hospital’s declaration of birth. The Social Security card may be used to show a common address.

Note: Any financial documentation you submit must include BOTH your name and the dependent’s name with the common address.

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Almost half of adult Gen Zers get financial help from their parents

Most gen zers cited the high cost of living as the main barrier to financial security.

Almost half of adult Gen Zers are still getting financial help from their parents, according to a new Bank of America study of the generation’s financial health.

Suggested Reading

The survey published Wednesday revealed 46% of Gen Zers between the ages of 18 and 27 reported getting some cash from their families. Fifty-two percent said they don’t make enough to live where they desire.

Related Content

Exactly half of adult Gen Zers don’t feel on track to buy a home, while 46% said they are not saving enough for retirement.

Most Gen Zers predictably cited the high cost of living as the main barrier to financial security. Two-thirds reported cutting back expenses to save money, including 43% who are dining out less, and 24% who are turning to more affordable grocery stores.

Fifty-four percent of adult Gen Zers surveyed also said they don’t pay for their own housing, either living at home or relying on their family to pay their rent—which isn’t as outlandish as it sounds considering how many people in that group are still in school.

More concerning: Bank of America also reported that 57% of those who took the survey said they don’t have enough emergency savings to cover three months of expenses.

“Though faced with obstacles driven by the cost of living, younger Americans are showing discipline and foresight in their saving and spending patterns,” Holly O’Neill, the President of Retail Banking at Bank of America, said in response to the survey results.

“It is critical that we continue to empower Gen Z to work toward achieving financial health and meeting their long-term goals.”

Gen Z isn’t being unreasonable when they report not feeling financially secure. A recent study by Trans Union found they are making less than millennials were a decade ago.

The study found that as of the fourth quarter of 2023, Gen Zers ages 22 to 24 made an average of $45,493. That’s far less than the $51,825 millennials were making at the same ages 10 years ago when adjusted for inflation.

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Breaking news, congressional democrats still quiet ahead of biden’s press conference.

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Ahead of President Biden’s Thursday evening press conference, none of North Carolina’s seven Democrats in Congress are among the 10 nationally with public statements calling for him to exit the race.

Nor have their social media posts or press releases reaffirmed support.

As the 75th anniversary summit of NATO closes in Washington, DC, the president is scheduled for a 6:30 p.m. ET news conference. The embattled leader has been fighting off critics, particularly since a June 26 debate against former President Donald Trump in Atlanta.

North Carolina is represented by three Democrats who will exit when their terms end this year — Kathy Manning, Wiley Nickel and Jeff Jackson. Four running for re-election are Don Davis, Deborah Ross, Valerie Foushee and Alma Adams, with Davis in what is cast as the most toss-up of the 14 congressional districts.

All remain quiet publicly on social media and in press releases on Biden, though there are hints, such as Davis in a media availability setting saying he needs to “step up.”

The latest redistricting maps are forecast to allow Ross, Foushee and Adams to retain their seats. Manning, Nickel and Jackson cited the maps as reason not to run, though Jackson opted for trying to win the state attorney general seat. He’s pitted against Republican US Rep. Dan Bishop.

Trump has spent an unusual two weeks far quieter than his usual bombastic self, allowing the spinning news cycle to concentrate on Biden. And mainstream media, surprisingly enough, obliged as Democrats murmured among themselves, 10 in Congress publicly called for him to exit the race, and even Democrat-backing Hollywood giants Rob Reiner and George Clooney said winning in November isn’t possible if Biden stays on the ticket.

Those 10 Democrats are Sen. Peter Welch from Vermont and Reps. Lloyd Doggett of Texas, Raúl Grijalva of Arizona, Seth Moulton of Massachusetts, Mike Quigley of Illinois, Angie Craig of Minnesota, Adam Smith of Washington, Mikie Sherrill of New Jersey, Pat Ryan of New York and Earl Blumenauer of Oregon.

Biden in November 1972 won election as a US senator just five years after law school. He’s served consecutively in Washington since, apart from the four years of the Trump administration. Fifteen days after Election Day, he’ll turn 82.

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Parents who adopt out of Michigan child welfare need more services

Kim and her husband, a stay-at-home mom and electrical engineer who live in a pretty lakeside house in mid-Michigan, were raising teenagers when they got the call about a little boy who needed a home. He was just a toddler but was acting out the domestic violence he’d witnessed on his baby sister, and his foster parents didn’t want to keep the pair together. The couple had 24 hours to decide whether they could help.

Kim prayed and read her Bible for guidance. She had a big heart — had always loved being a mother, and her older kids were just amazing. How much harder could it be to take a 2-year-old home?

“We were naive,” she said.

Early childhood trauma, adverse childhood experiences and prenatal exposure to drugs, including alcohol, can cause psychological, biological and social problems that can last into adulthood and require interventions — time-consuming and expensive ones at that.

Up to 80% of children in foster care suffer from some type of mental health condition, compared with about 22% of other kids.

But many adoptive parents set out to complete their families or help a child in their community without a clear picture of the challenges that lie ahead for them. When they realize they need help, it’s sometimes too late, or they can't find any assistance.

The Free Press spoke with about a dozen parents who had adopted children out of the child welfare system over the last 15 years. Their children had varying degrees of special needs and a laundry list of mental health diagnoses and developmental delays.

Most felt unprepared, didn’t get the services or support they felt they needed, and ended up finding help on their own.

“The behaviors that the families are struggling with so severely are really related to the early traumas not being healed yet,” said Renee Orr, a clinical social worker and therapist in Grand Rapids who has spent most of her 25-year career in the child welfare system. “But once the kiddo is adopted into a family, the state sort of washes their hands and says, 'OK, the kid’s adopted now, case closed.' ”

“The services that they put in place are completely inappropriate and not scaled at what these kids truly need.”

Adoptive parents need more support than they’re getting

The foster parent training Kim and her husband received left them believing that the little boy they agreed to foster had some baggage, but in a loving, secure, safe home, he was going to grow out of it.

That was not the case. Over the years, after the couple adopted both the little boy and his sister, their behavioral issues made living in the house like walking through a minefield. The Free Press is withholding the names of the children and the family’s last name to protect their privacy.

Both of the children had been physically and emotionally abused and probably had fetal alcohol syndrome disorders. The boy has PTSD, an anxiety disorder and reactive attachment disorder, which leaves conventional parenting techniques ineffective.

It fell completely on Kim and her husband to figure out how to get those diagnoses — which are prerequisites for getting services.

Though they qualified for respite care, there was no one to provide it.

Though her children received therapy, the providers seemed unaware of the kind of therapeutic approach to use with adopted children with trauma backgrounds. One called child protective services to the house during a session, causing both kids to panic that they were being taken away. Another told the couple their son’s behavior was the result of bad parenting. “Don’t let him run all over you,” she advised them. “Be consistent.”

And although eventually her son received the benefit of going to a residential treatment program, he was allowed only a six-month stay. He was sent home when the time was up, and 10 days later, he tore up his school, threatened to kill himself and others, made an attempt at the responding officer’s gun and ended up in the emergency room. “And everything started all over again,” Kim said.

More: Michigan takes foster kids' federal benefit money and reimburses itself for their care

More: A federal law demands mental health care parity. Why don't kids in Michigan get it?

Michigan programs support adoptive families

The state offers three adoption assistance programs : a nonrecurring adoption support payment of up to $2,000, a monthly adoption assistance payment and an adoption medical subsidy. But pieces of each apply to certain eligible children and none of them are automatic.

The monthly adoption assistance payment is available for 95% of adoptable children and can be used for general expenses. Most parents get between $22.35 and $26.69 a day, though some have negotiated higher or lower amounts. About 20,000 children in Michigan currently receive these payments, according to Children’s Services Administration director Demetrius Starling .

Orr said some adoptive parents worry that some will consider them greedy for taking state money to put their kids into sports or music lessons or buy them clothes. But by Orr’s estimate, 95% of adoption subsidy money gets put toward therapy. “They need help and families can't afford it,” she said.

In addition to resources, the state provides support. The Adoptive Family Support Network was allocated $250,000 in state funding to operate a mentor program “to provide a listening ear, knowledgeable guidance and community connections to adoptive parents.”

Starling said the state’s 12 Family Resource Centers were available for any parent in need of assistance, including adoptive parents trying to access mental health or other services for their kids.

Post-Adoption Resource Centers , which opened in 2012, hold regular support groups and can help find adoption-informed therapists and other resources such as respite care, trauma assessments, summer camp subsidies and more. They can also offer case management services when families need extra help.

“If you compare it nationally, the fact that we do have post-adopt(ion) resource centers and money allocated and consistent contracts for that … is something that speaks to the desire to support families,” said Melissa Jenovai, president and CEO of Spaulding for Children , a not-for-profit child welfare agency in Southfield.

Support isn't reaching everyone who needs it

Those who reach out to a PARC, eight of which are spread across Michigan and administered by four different agencies, have varying degrees of success in getting help. Some have expressed publicly how useful these centers are. Others have given up trying to reach out to them for help.

“I feel like there's a lot of marketing that doesn't have a whole lot of actual support behind it.” said Ben Kraker, who adopted an 8-year-old daughter out of Michigan’s child welfare system. “You think there's something out there … but then you get into it and you're like, that's a mile wide and an inch deep. Like, there's nothing really there.”

Then there’s Michigan’s Adoption Medical Subsidy Program , which reimburses families for costs associated with certain physical or behavioral health needs. To get this, parents must show that the child has an identified physical, mental or emotional condition that existed — or was caused by something that existed — before the adoption petition was filed.

“It's not mandated to exist and it is a program that Michigan offers that many other states do not have anything even close to,” said Lara Bouse, president and director of Fostering Forward Michigan . “It's a really impressive program. It's not perfect, it could be better, but we'll get there.”

Improvements haven’t come quickly enough for the Zimmermans in Osceola County, who’ve had to pay out of pocket for many of their adopted daughter’s health and developmental issues.

When they petitioned to adopt the little girl they’d been fostering since she was 3 days old, the state determined her needs weren’t great enough to qualify for the adoption subsidy; kids under the age of 3 don’t automatically get it, nor do they receive Medicaid coverage.

The Zimmermans were concerned about what that would mean for them financially if it turned out their daughter needed a higher level of support. Maybe they should wait to officially adopt her until her third birthday?

But Amanda Zimmerman said foster care workers encouraged her to proceed with adoption right away; establishing permanency quickly is a goal for children in care. Plus, caseworkers told her, she could always reapply later for adoption assistance once her daughter had official diagnoses.

Their daughter was developmentally delayed, as they expected. But the Zimmermans didn’t anticipate how early childhood trauma would continue to shape her thoughts, her behavior and her actions.

Now 8 years old, she poops in her pants and doesn’t tell anyone, doesn’t play well with other kids, becomes physically aggressive and screams and cries for up to two hours when her parents tell her "no." Her brain continues to tell her the world is not a safe place and her needs will not be met.

She was diagnosed with a host of issues including PTSD and an expressive communication disorder. Since she can’t handle going more than one place each day, the family can’t go new places, or camping, or on vacations.

They can’t really afford those things anyway, Zimmerman said. She had to quit her well-paying job to have the time to attend to all her daughter’s needs and took a part-time job at the local library instead. The family spent years paying out of pocket for all their daughter’s appointments.

A severe emotional disturbance waiver afforded a limited-time access to Medicaid and eligibility to programs such as art and music therapy. But there were no providers in the area to deliver them, and Zimmerman said community mental health workers were not trauma-informed and didn’t offer therapies that aligned with her daughter’s needs.

Medicaid did help pay for things she benefits from: occupational, feeding and speech therapies. Now, community mental health has informed Zimmerman it’s unlikely her daughter’s enrollment will be renewed.

When Zimmerman looked into reapplying for the adoption subsidy to get more of her daughter’s needs covered, she discovered that the state’s Redetermined Adoption Assistance program has never been funded by the state budget office.

Her adoption worker, the person who served as her daughter’s guardian ad litem, said, “everyone I've spoken with is shocked it hasn't been funded and can't be applied for,” Zimmerman said. “The staff continues to think it's available for people, and it's not.”

As their daughter’s ninth birthday approaches, the Zimmermans continue to hit walls in getting her therapies subsidized. “It's mind-blowing to me the things that we were told would be covered post-adoption and continue to be denied,” she said.

More: Staffers at Grayling juvenile justice center suffer bites, broken bones — and fear worse

More: Michigan is first state to ease kinship care rules, but most caregivers won't benefit

Could Michigan take a page from other states' playbooks?

Michigan’s adoption subsidy pays a higher rate than many states — and rates were increased in last year’s budget. Starling said these were “significant increases” that brought Michigan’s subsidy rates up from below average to a level that provides “substantial” support to adoptive families who need the assistance.

Michigan provides vastly more support than the handful of states that told the national AdoptUSkids project that they offer “no special services” as part of a publicly funded post-adoption program.

But some states provide a menu of additional services and support that Michigan does not.

In Tennessee , adoptive families receive trauma-informed assessment and in-home family-focused counseling at no cost, as well as ongoing case management. Experienced adoptive parents serve as staff for statewide community social events where families who adopted out of the child welfare system find connection and support.

Besides automatic Medicaid enrollment for children adopted from state care, Illinois offers child mental health services and advocacy, youth and adult support groups and “trauma-informed, attachment-focused, resiliency-building, therapeutic services,” according to a guide to post adoption services . “Testimonials from families who have used support services reveal that these services worked, while other traditional, less intensive services they had tried, did not,” the text reads.

Some states offer child care, access to specialized advocates to help navigate school systems, or help forging relationships with birth parents.   

In Delaware, the support model is built on “intensive preparation and then really good, intensive, neverending support,” according to Meg Garey, executive director of A Better Chance for Our Children, which provides post-permanency services for the state.

There, every family receives case management services that could include going with parents to meetings at a child’s school, going to court with them or navigating relationships with birth families. They also get crisis support until a kid turns 18, training and support groups, parent coaching, sibling support and even a drop-off recreation program to give families a break.

Garey said post-permanency services are viewed as prevention — a way to make sure once a kid finds a home, it’s forever.

Parents need to ask for help

Free therapy for foster and adoptive parents is the top ask for Stacy Goodson, an adoptive mother of five who works in child welfare and has fostered more than 40 children over the last decade.

“I would 1 million percent love to see that, and I think we'd have a lot more successful placements if the parents have therapists themselves as well,” she said. “Because a lot of times kiddos and their stuff brings up stuff in ourselves. If we don't have a proper way to process it, then it can create double the challenges.”

Zimmerman said she’d like to see adoptive parents connected with more resources right away — not when they’re dealing with an emergency.

Orr said that by the time most families come to her for help, they’re in a crisis.

Some experts say parents here aren’t asking for help soon or often enough. Parents themselves admit they didn’t look for resources until their needs became urgent or unmanageable.

A lot of times, when families turn to Spaulding for Children for help with an adopted child’s behavior, they’re just at the end of their rope, according to its president and CEO Melissa Jenovai.

Things tend to spike about eight years after adoption, long after families have moved on from working with groups like PARC, and often around the time puberty kicks in and heightens every behavioral challenge. “Then you're so far removed from the system and you're in a crisis, of trying to figure out how to respond,” Jenovai said.

Bouse has noticed the same thing; when the adoption paperwork is signed and parents no longer must answer to the state or adoption agency, they sometimes back away from services that should probably stay in place.

Adoption agencies wouldn’t want to mandate parents sign up for support they don’t want or need, Bouse pointed out. “But we do desperately need to find a way to have adoptive parents feel safe in asking for help and not feeling so desperate that their only option is to give up on their child,” she said.

But other adoptive parents aren’t sure why the state or adoption agencies don’t make it easier to find what they need.

Brian and his husband, Jeff, whose last names are being withheld for security reasons, were so overwhelmed with one of their foster son’s violent and destructive behavior that they gave their 30-day notice that they could no longer keep him. Suddenly a wealth of support was made available, including a community mental health-funded parent support partner who met with the couple every other week and taught them a game-changing interventional model .  

“It would have been nice to know what options we have,” said Brian, who eventually adopted the boy and a second one from a group home near Grand Rapids.

A very different life than they imagined

Kim and her husband are connected with their regional PARC, and the Adoption and Foster Support Network. But most helpful is probably the fact that a nearby adoptive mom has an open door and a full coffee pot every Wednesday night for whoever needs to come find support and trade stories.

Today, the couple’s lives look a lot different than what they expected when they answered that phone call to take in a little boy who needed a loving family.

Their adopted children are too volatile to take to activities or social events, so family events, church, gatherings with friends; these are things Kim and her husband don’t get to participate in anymore — at least not together.

When their grandbaby comes for a visit, two adults have to be in the room at all times, to make sure she’s safe. So no one gets a break, or special time with the little one or a chance to run to the grocery store.

Two summers ago, they managed to sneak off for a camping trip to a state park about an hour away — just the two of them. But that first night under the stars, Kim got a call that her adopted daughter was in the emergency room after she shoved a Lego into her ear.

When they got back, their daughter and son-in-law said they just didn’t think they could watch the kids again. 

Kim’s home has large windows overlooking the nearby water where she’d hoped to spend lazy weekends boating with her husband and friends. Now, their closed-off little world feels very small.

They continue to fight for funding to get their son placed back into residential treatment. He says he wants to go, so he doesn’t hurt anyone.

A few months ago, they were one of 30 families to be awarded by the Michigan Adoption Resource Exchange. They got a $200 gift card to Great Wolf Lodge and a bundt cake. MARE also sent her a framed family photo — the one they featured on their Facebook page where the faces of children who need a home smile out at scrollers. It shows the family nestled together in the rough arms of a giant tree, somewhat smiling.

Kim doesn’t know whether she can bear to hang it up in the house. She feels like her family is falling apart.

“I find it ironic,” she said. “One state department giving us family accolades and one state department refusing to help keep our family together.”

Jennifer Brookland covers child welfare for the Detroit Free Press. This story was produced with support from The Dart Center for Journalism and Trauma at Columbia University.