speech on self worth

Speech on Self Worth

Self-worth is like a special treasure inside you. It’s your belief about your own value and importance.

If you see yourself as worthy and valuable, you can feel happy and confident. It’s an important part of who you are.

1-minute Speech on Self Worth

Ladies and gentlemen, today let’s talk about a very important topic. It’s called self-worth. Self-worth is about how much you believe in yourself. It’s about knowing that you are important and valuable, just like everyone else.

When you look in the mirror, what do you see? Do you see someone who is strong, eager, and full of potential? Or do you see someone who is not good enough? Remember, everyone has a special, unique value. No one else in the world is exactly like you. That’s why you should always be proud of who you are.

Sometimes, people may say or do things that make you feel small. But remember, what they think or say about you does not change your worth. Your worth is not based on what others think of you, but what you think of yourself. So, always believe in yourself.

Also, it’s important to be kind to yourself. We all make mistakes. That’s how we learn and grow. When you make a mistake, don’t be hard on yourself. Instead, try to learn from it. This way, you can become a stronger, wiser person.

Last but not least, remember to love yourself. Be your own best friend. When you love yourself, you can love others better. When you believe in yourself, you can achieve anything you set your mind to.

So, let’s all promise to value ourselves. Let’s believe in our strength, learn from our mistakes, and love ourselves. Because we are all unique and special in our own way. Let’s remember, our self-worth is priceless.

2-minute Speech on Self Worth

Ladies and gentlemen, today I stand before you to talk about self-worth. Self-worth is a bit like your own secret treasure. It’s the value you believe you have as a person. It’s the good stuff you think about when you think about yourself.

Imagine a bucket. We all have our own. This bucket is where we keep our self-worth. When we do something good or someone praises us, it’s like we put a shiny gold coin into our bucket. But when we do something wrong or someone hurts us, it’s like a coin got taken out. It’s important to keep our bucket full, but that’s not always easy.

Remember, self-worth is not about being the best at everything. It’s not about getting the most gold coins. It’s not about having the most friends or the biggest house. It’s about knowing that you are valuable just because you are you. Even when you make mistakes or feel sad, your worth doesn’t change.

You see, our self-worth is not something that others can give or take away. It’s not something we can lose or gain. It’s like a seed inside us. It’s always there. We just need to water it and let it grow.

And how do we do that? We do it by being kind to ourselves. We do it by believing in ourselves, even when things are tough. We do it by standing up tall and saying, ‘I am worth it. I matter. I am enough.’

But sometimes, we forget about our self-worth. We let others tell us what we’re worth. We let them take coins from our bucket. We let them make us feel small. That’s not right. Your worth is not something that can be measured or compared. It’s something that you have, always, no matter what.

Friends, you are more than the grades you get in school. You are more than the mistakes you make. You are more than the clothes you wear or the games you play. You are you. And you are valuable, just the way you are.

Let’s promise to remember our worth. Let’s promise to keep our buckets full. Let’s promise to never let anyone tell us we are less.

Because you are worth it. You are enough. You are special. Know it. Believe it. Live it.

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Motivational Speech to Know your Worth

Many people are incredibly talented, and they don't even know it.

Their potential is limited not by their circumstances but by their internal assessment of themselves. Self-doubt will leave you precariously clawing at the world to give you any sign of significance.  Some people can become desperate and clingy. They are hoping for any accolade to make them feel worthy.

To have energy to climb outside yourself, you need lots of positive affirmation. Surround yourself with positive messages. Here is a short motivational speech to help you believe in yourself. As a keynote speaker I know the power of words to transform you.

Below is a motivational speech you can read to yourself (or others) that will inspire you to know your worth. Read it, write it out again, say it out loud, watch the YouTube video. Repetition is critical to crowd out negative, doubtful thoughts. Replace them with thoughts that believe in your self-worth.

Anytime you look outside yourself for your value, you instigate self-doubt. It's like telling yourself you don't matter, but perhaps someone else can assess you and give you meaning.  What you are forgetting is that your worth is inside you. Only you can determine it.

Today we rely heavily on others likes on social media to give us a boost of self-worth. It's making us long for something that someone else can't give us. Only you can determine your worth. And you should. If doubt holds you back, you need to build yourself back up.

Deeply embroiled in our stress response is a trigger that has you doubt yourself. It's automatic, and it instantly makes you question yourself. Deep in our survival instinct are mechanisms that have us protect ourselves. Fear causes us to shy away from situations that too risky and make us question ourselves. Fear is a strong emotion that most people flee. Don't let fear get it's way.

If you don't know your worth, you are in a very precarious position.

Short Motivational Speech - You know your worth

Anytime you look outside yourself to determine your value, your looking in the wrong place.

Look inside you. You know your worth. Your value is inside you.

Nobody can take it away from you. Nobody can take it away because it's yours.

When you look to others for validation or signs of significance, you weaken yourself. They don't know you. You know you.

When you want approval from others, you weaken your resolve.

When you need approval from others, you go further from your truth.

When you need approval from others, you do things for the wrong reasons.

Your value is in you. Know your worth. Don't let anyone ever tear you down. Build yourself back up. Don't let other people put their self-doubt inside you. It's their not yours. 

Let go of limiting beliefs and grab onto hope. Trust.

You can't ask for something new and expect nothing to change. Let go of the doubts that hold you back. Let go of fears that consume. Let go of needing others approval. 

Within you right now is all that you need to accomplish what you want. In you right now is all you need to be happy and prosperous.

When something you don't like happens, negative limiting and draining energy will bring you down.

Now you must lift your energy back up. Don't let stress have its way with you. 

When something doesn't feel right.

When you feel heavy.

When people's words make you feel bad. Run. Leave.

They don't Determine your Worth. You do. 

Protect your value. Don't let other people's negativity lead you astray.

You can clear your energy through your mind. When someone or something puts doubt or fear in you, turn it into hope.

Your thoughts are powerful. You are powerful.

Some days you will need extra motivation. Say inspiring thoughts to yourself every day. Alter how you think.

Your thoughts create your future.

Turn doubt into hope

Turn fear into a belief

Turn resentment into love.

You create the future you deserve. Nobody else does

You're on the right track.

Don't let doubt bring you down.

Don't let others doubt make you hide.

Trust yourself.

Trust your value.

Know your worth. 

Immerse yourself in patience. Keep believing in yourself.

Your mind is powerful. Everything happens because of your thoughts.

That's why you need to believe in yourself.

You limit yourself through your thoughts. You define your future because of your thoughts.

Protect your thoughts.

Deny negative people in your life.

Do things that inspire you. Believe in yourself today. 

Chose to experience something different. Life is full of possibilities. Forget what others tell you. Tell yourself how important you are.

Tell others about your dreams. Believe in yourself; feel your power. Know your worth.

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The Power of Words: Inspiring Speeches for Personal Growth

by admin | Nov 4, 2023

Discover the transformative power of inspiring speeches for personal growth. Unleash your full potential, cultivate resilience, and embrace self-discovery with the power of words.

Have you ever been moved to take action or make positive changes in your life simply by listening to a powerful speech? The Power of Words: Inspiring Speeches for Personal Growth is a collection of captivating and thought-provoking speeches that have the ability to ignite a spark within you. Each speech is carefully crafted to inspire, motivate, and empower individuals to reach their full potential. Whether you’re seeking inspiration in your career, relationships, or personal development, this collection is sure to leave a lasting impact on your life. Get ready to be inspired, uplifted, and motivated like never before as you delve into the power of words.

Importance of Inspirational Speeches

Inspirational speeches play a crucial role in personal growth. They have the power to ignite a spark within us, motivating us to overcome obstacles, pursue our passions, and cultivate a deeper understanding of ourselves. These speeches can act as a guiding light, providing us with the necessary inspiration and guidance to embark on a journey of self-improvement and transformation. Words have the ability to uplift our spirits, instill positivity, and spark a sense of determination within us. By listening to inspirational speeches, we can tap into our true potential and unleash a world of possibilities.

Understanding Personal Growth

Before delving into the impact of inspiring speeches on personal growth, it is essential to have a clear understanding of what personal growth entails. Personal growth refers to the continuous process of self-improvement, wherein individuals strive to become the best version of themselves. It involves developing new skills, expanding knowledge, and embracing personal and professional challenges. Personal growth is a lifelong journey that requires self-reflection, commitment, and the willingness to step out of one’s comfort zone. It encompasses various aspects of our lives, including physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual well-being.

The Role of Words in Personal Growth

Words are not merely a combination of letters; they possess the power to influence and inspire. In the realm of personal growth, words act as catalysts for change. They have the ability to shape our beliefs, drive our actions, and impact our mindset. Inspiring speeches are a powerful tool in personal growth as they provide encouragement, guidance, and motivation. They have the potential to awaken our innermost desires, instill confidence, and foster a sense of resilience within us. By internalizing the words spoken in these speeches, we can harness their transformative power and embark on a journey of self-discovery and personal development.

Speeches That Ignite Personal Growth

1. overcoming obstacles.

One of the most common themes in inspiring speeches is overcoming obstacles. Life is full of challenges, and these speeches help us develop the mindset and resilience required to overcome them. They teach us that setbacks and failures are not roadblocks but opportunities for growth. Through these speeches, we learn the importance of perseverance, determination, and staying committed to our goals, even in the face of adversity. By internalizing the message conveyed in these speeches, we can develop a mindset that empowers us to turn obstacles into stepping stones on our path to personal growth.

2. Pursuing Passion and Purpose

Inspiring speeches focused on pursuing passion and purpose remind us of the significance of aligning our actions with our innermost desires. These speeches encourage us to identify our passions, explore our interests, and pursue a path that brings us fulfillment and joy. They emphasize the importance of stepping out of our comfort zones and taking risks in order to pursue our dreams. By listening to these speeches, we are inspired to embrace our passions wholeheartedly, follow our dreams, and create a life that is aligned with our true purpose.

3. Building Self-Confidence

Self-confidence is a crucial attribute required for personal growth, and inspiring speeches can be instrumental in building it. These speeches remind us of our inherent worth and potential, encouraging us to believe in ourselves and our abilities. They instill confidence by emphasizing the importance of embracing our strengths and celebrating our achievements. By internalizing the messages delivered in these speeches, we can develop a strong sense of self-confidence that empowers us to take on new challenges, overcome self-doubt, and seize opportunities for personal growth.

4. Embracing Resilience

Resilience is the ability to bounce back from setbacks and challenges, and it is an essential quality for personal growth. Inspiring speeches focused on resilience remind us that failure is not the end but a stepping stone towards success. They highlight the importance of embracing failure as a valuable learning experience and bouncing back stronger than ever. By listening to these speeches, we gain the strength and determination to face adversity head-on, learn from our mistakes, and continue moving forward on our personal growth journey.

5. Cultivating a Growth Mindset

A growth mindset is the belief that our abilities and intelligence can be developed through dedication and hard work. Inspiring speeches centered around cultivating a growth mindset encourage us to embrace challenges, view setbacks as opportunities for growth, and persist in the face of obstacles. They remind us that intelligence, talent, and success are not fixed traits but can be nurtured and developed. By internalizing the teachings of these speeches, we can foster a growth mindset that propels us towards personal growth and achievement.

6. Fostering Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence involves the ability to recognize, understand, and manage our own emotions, as well as empathize with the emotions of others. Inspiring speeches focused on emotional intelligence guide us towards nurturing this essential skill. They emphasize the importance of self-awareness, emotional regulation, and interpersonal relationships. By listening to these speeches, we are inspired to develop a deeper understanding of our emotions, cultivate empathy towards others, and build meaningful connections that contribute to our personal growth.

7. Cultivating Positive Relationships

Relationships have a significant impact on our personal growth, and inspiring speeches on cultivating positive relationships highlight this fact. They emphasize the importance of surrounding ourselves with supportive and uplifting individuals who encourage our growth and inspire us to be our best selves. These speeches emphasize the power of collaboration, effective communication, and building authentic connections. By internalizing the wisdom shared in these speeches, we can cultivate positive relationships that foster personal growth and create a supportive network of individuals who uplift and inspire us.

8. Enhancing Self-Awareness

Self-awareness is the ability to recognize and understand one’s own thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. Inspiring speeches centered around enhancing self-awareness guide us towards introspection and self-reflection. They encourage us to embark on a journey of self-discovery, identify our strengths and weaknesses, and embrace our authentic selves. By listening to these speeches, we gain insight into our own thoughts and behaviors, which in turn allows us to make more informed choices, set meaningful goals, and continually strive for personal growth.

9. Overcoming Fear and Taking Risks

Fear often holds us back from reaching our full potential, and inspiring speeches on overcoming fear and taking risks address this common obstacle to personal growth. These speeches encourage us to step out of our comfort zones, embrace uncertainty, and confront our fears head-on. They remind us that growth and transformation occur outside of our comfort zones and that taking calculated risks is essential for personal growth. By internalizing the messages of these speeches, we can break free from the grip of fear, embrace new opportunities, and propel ourselves towards personal growth and success.

10. Finding Balance and Inner Peace

In the hustle and bustle of daily life, finding balance and inner peace is crucial for personal growth. Inspiring speeches on finding balance and inner peace emphasize the importance of self-care, mindfulness, and living in the present moment. They encourage us to prioritize our well-being, create space for self-reflection, and cultivate a sense of inner calm. By listening to these speeches, we are reminded to slow down, reconnect with ourselves, and foster a balanced and peaceful lifestyle that facilitates personal growth.

Analyzing Iconic Speeches

1. martin luther king jr.’s ‘i have a dream’.

Martin Luther King Jr.’s ‘I Have a Dream’ speech is one of the most iconic and influential speeches in history. In this powerful speech, King delivers a message of hope, equality, and social justice. His words inspire individuals to believe in the possibility of a better future and encourage them to take action towards achieving racial equality. King’s speech is a testament to the power of words in mobilizing individuals and igniting social change. By analyzing this speech, we gain insight into the impact that a well-crafted and passionate message can have on personal growth and societal transformation.

2. Steve Jobs’ Stanford Commencement Speech

Steve Jobs’ Stanford Commencement Speech is a memorable and thought-provoking speech that encourages individuals to follow their passions and embrace the uncertainties of life. He shares personal anecdotes and life lessons, urging graduates to pursue their dreams and have the courage to make unconventional choices. Jobs’ speech highlights the importance of staying true to oneself, embracing failure, and finding purpose in our work. By examining this speech, we can learn valuable lessons about personal growth, resilience, and the pursuit of our dreams.

3. J.K. Rowling’s Harvard Commencement Speech

J.K. Rowling’s Harvard Commencement Speech is a testament to the power of resilience and failure in personal growth. She speaks candidly about her own experiences with failure and the lessons she learned along the way. Rowling’s speech reinforces the idea that failure is not something to be feared but a necessary stepping stone towards success. She inspires individuals to embrace their failures, learn from them, and persevere in the pursuit of their dreams. By analyzing this speech, we gain valuable insights into the role of resilience, determination, and embracing failure in personal growth.

4. Oprah Winfrey’s Harvard Commencement Speech

Oprah Winfrey’s Harvard Commencement Speech is a powerful and inspiring speech that encourages individuals to live a life of purpose and meaning. She shares personal anecdotes and reflections, detailing the transformative power of embracing one’s true self and following one’s passions. Winfrey’s speech highlights the importance of authenticity, gratitude, and service in personal growth. By examining this speech, we can gain valuable insights into the power of self-discovery, embracing our authentic selves, and making a positive impact on the world.

5. Ellen DeGeneres’ Tulane University Commencement Speech

Ellen DeGeneres’ Tulane University Commencement Speech is a heartfelt and humorous speech that encourages individuals to embrace kindness, compassion, and authenticity. She shares personal stories and anecdotes, highlighting the importance of being true to oneself and spreading positivity in the world. DeGeneres’ speech reinforces the value of embracing diversity, celebrating individuality, and finding joy in everyday moments. By analyzing this speech, we can gain valuable insights into the power of kindness, authenticity, and embracing our unique selves in personal growth.

Strategies to Apply the Power of Words

1. practicing self-affirmation.

Self-affirmation involves consciously and positively reaffirming our own worth and abilities. By practicing self-affirmation, we can counter negative self-talk and cultivate a positive mindset. This strategy involves repeating positive affirmations, such as “I am capable and deserving of success,” to ourselves regularly. By incorporating self-affirmation into our daily routine, we can harness the power of words to boost our self-confidence and drive personal growth.

2. Visualization and Manifestation Techniques

Visualization and manifestation techniques involve creating vivid mental images of our desired outcomes and beliefs. By visualizing ourselves achieving our goals and embodying the qualities we aspire to possess, we can program our minds for success. This strategy involves creating vision boards, meditating on our goals, and visualizing ourselves in the future we desire. By utilizing visualization and manifestation techniques, we can align our thoughts and actions with our aspirations, paving the way for personal growth.

3. Writing and Reflecting on Personal Mantras

Personal mantras are short, powerful statements or affirmations that reflect our values and aspirations. By writing and reflecting on personal mantras, we can remind ourselves of what is truly important to us and anchor ourselves in our values. This strategy involves identifying key principles or beliefs that resonate with us and crafting affirmations around them, such as “I am resilient, adaptable, and capable of overcoming any challenge.” By incorporating personal mantras into our daily practice, we can reinforce positive beliefs and foster personal growth.

4. Daily Affirmations and Positive Self-Talk

Daily affirmations and positive self-talk involve consciously choosing to speak to ourselves in a supportive and uplifting manner. By replacing negative self-talk with positive affirmations, we can reframe our mindset and cultivate a greater sense of self-belief. This strategy involves incorporating positive statements, such as “I am confident and capable,” into our daily routines. By consistently practicing daily affirmations and positive self-talk, we can reshape our self-perception and unlock our full potential for personal growth.

5. Seeking Motivational and Educational Resources

Motivational and educational resources, such as books, podcasts, and videos, can provide valuable guidance and inspiration on our journey of personal growth. By seeking out these resources, we expose ourselves to new ideas, perspectives, and insights. This strategy involves actively seeking out motivational speeches, self-help books, and educational content that resonate with our interests and goals. By immersing ourselves in these resources, we can infuse our lives with fresh perspectives and knowledge, fueling our personal growth.

6. Surrounding Yourself with Positive Influences

The people we surround ourselves with have a significant impact on our personal growth. By intentionally cultivating relationships with positive and supportive individuals, we create an environment that nurtures our growth. This strategy involves identifying individuals who inspire us, motivate us, and uplift us, and actively seeking to spend time with them. By surrounding ourselves with positive influences, we create a support system that encourages our personal growth and provides us with the necessary motivation and guidance.

7. Participating in Public Speaking and Toastmasters

Public speaking and Toastmasters provide opportunities to practice and refine our communication skills, boost our self-confidence, and inspire others through our words. By participating in public speaking events and joining Toastmasters clubs, we can develop our ability to deliver impactful speeches and connect with an audience. This strategy involves seeking out public speaking opportunities, enrolling in Toastmasters clubs, and actively participating in speaking engagements. By honing our public speaking skills, we can harness the power of words to inspire personal growth in ourselves and others.

8. Joining Supportive Communities

Joining supportive communities can provide a sense of belonging, encouragement, and accountability on our personal growth journey. By connecting with like-minded individuals who are also striving for personal development, we create a network of support that empowers us. This strategy involves seeking out communities, such as mastermind groups or online forums, where individuals come together to support and motivate each other. By joining these communities, we can share our experiences, gain valuable insights, and receive the encouragement we need to continue growing.

9. Reading and Sharing Inspirational Stories

Reading and sharing inspirational stories can have a profound impact on personal growth. By immersing ourselves in stories of triumph, resilience, and personal transformation, we gain valuable insights and inspiration. This strategy involves seeking out biographies, memoirs, or personal development books that resonate with our interests. By reading and sharing these stories, we can tap into the power of words to ignite personal growth and motivate others on their own journeys.

10. Incorporating Inspirational Quotes into Daily Life

Inspirational quotes serve as powerful reminders of our capabilities and aspirations. By incorporating inspirational quotes into our daily lives, we can infuse our days with positivity and motivation. This strategy involves selecting meaningful quotes that resonate with us and displaying them in places where we will see them frequently, such as on our desks or as phone wallpapers. By immersing ourselves in these quotes, we create a constant reminder of our potential and the path of personal growth that lies ahead.

The Impact of Words on Personal Growth

1. shaping beliefs and mindset.

Words have the power to shape our beliefs and mindset. By internalizing positive and empowering messages, we can cultivate a growth-oriented mindset that propels us towards personal growth. The words we speak and listen to can reshape our perception, challenge limiting beliefs, and open up new possibilities.

2. Encouraging Action and Motivation

Inspiring speeches and words have the ability to spark action and motivation within us. They awaken our inner drive, fuel our ambitions, and propel us towards taking positive steps on our personal growth journey. By hearing the right words at the right time, we can find the courage and motivation to pursue our dreams and overcome obstacles.

3. Boosting Confidence and Self-Esteem

The power of positive words is undeniable when it comes to boosting confidence and self-esteem. Inspirational speeches and affirmations have the ability to remind us of our inherent worth and potential, instilling a sense of belief in ourselves and our abilities. By internalizing empowering words, we can cultivate a strong sense of self-confidence and self-love that serves as a foundation for personal growth.

4. Cultivating Optimism and Resilience

Optimism and resilience are essential qualities for personal growth, and words can play a crucial role in cultivating these attributes. Inspirational speeches and positive self-talk help us reframe challenges, see setbacks as opportunities for growth, and foster a mindset of perseverance. By embracing the power of positive words, we can build resilience, bounce back from adversity, and maintain an optimistic outlook on our personal growth journey.

5. Fostering Empathy and Emotional Intelligence

Words have the power to foster empathy and emotional intelligence within us. Inspiring speeches and stories of human experiences help us connect with the emotions and experiences of others, fostering a deeper understanding and empathy. By internalizing the words spoken in these speeches, we can develop our emotional intelligence, strengthen our interpersonal relationships, and cultivate a greater sense of compassion on our personal growth journey.

6. Strengthening Relationships and Connections

The words we use in our interactions with others can strengthen relationships and connections. By speaking uplifting and supportive words to our loved ones, we can build trust, understanding, and a sense of connection. By actively listening to others’ words, we show empathy and create a space for meaningful connections that contribute to our personal growth.

7. Expanding Knowledge and Perspective

Words are the vehicle for knowledge and perspective. By listening to inspiring speeches, reading books, and engaging in thought-provoking conversations, we expand our knowledge, broaden our perspective, and gain valuable insights that contribute to our personal growth. By embracing the power of words, we can continuously grow intellectually and cultivate a thirst for knowledge.

8. Overcoming Fear and Limiting Beliefs

Fear and limiting beliefs often hinder personal growth, but the right words can help us overcome them. Inspirational speeches and positive self-talk offer a new perspective, challenging the fear and self-doubt that hold us back. By internalizing empowering words, we can break free from the grip of fear, challenge our limiting beliefs, and step into our full potential for personal growth.

9. Nurturing Personal Development and Transformation

Personal growth is a continuous process of development and transformation. Words can serve as guideposts along this journey, offering wisdom, guidance, and motivation to keep progressing. By immersing ourselves in inspiring speeches and transformative words, we create an environment that nurtures personal development and supports our ongoing transformation.

10. Inspiring Others and Creating a Ripple Effect

Finally, the power of words extends beyond ourselves. When we share our own experiences, deliver inspiring speeches, or simply speak words of encouragement and support to others, we have the ability to inspire and catalyze personal growth in those around us. By harnessing the power of our own words, we create a ripple effect, making a positive impact on the lives of others and collectively fostering a culture of personal growth.

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Tom Bilyeu Motivational Speeches Compilation – Build Your Self-Worth

Tom Bilyeu teaches us about the importance of self-worth in these 3 powerful speeches.

Download or Stream the album now, on your favorite music platform: i Tunes , Spotify , Apple Music ,  GooglePlay , AmazonMP3 or MP3 Download Anywhere In The World Speaker: Tom Bilyeu

Transcript: WHAT IS THE MOST YOU CAN BEAR? – Tom Bilyeu

If you want to do something extraordinary with your life, stop asking yourself what the least you need to do is. And start asking yourself what’s the most you can bear?

Humans are capable of truly unbelievable things. But the reality is the way that we get better, is by going through a simple process of adaptation. But what triggers the adaptation is stressors. It’s doing things that are difficult. It’s pushing yourself into a state of adapt or die.

The body wants to conserve energy, so unless you put yourself in the state where the body absolutely feels like to survive, it must adapt, you’re never going to change. And that’s why only the most elite people, end up achieving at the highest level, because they take the time to shape themselves.

They put the energy into getting better. They’re willing to suffer. They’re willing to push through and persevere, but until you’re willing to do that, until you’re willing to stop asking yourself what you can get away with and start asking yourself, how far can I go? Just how much am I capable of?

And when your fascination becomes that, when you start wondering just how much am I capable of? And every level that you achieve excites you to push harder, and go farther, and do more, and bear more weight. Then, all of the sudden you really can begin to surpass other people, but it takes that, it takes a total shift of your mindset.

You’ve got to be obsessed with just how far you can go. You have to be obsessed with finding your breaking point, and then pushing beyond that.

That is how you really begin to take advantage of the adaptation process. That’s how you begin to improve. That’s how you begin to build your body and build your mind, is to push beyond your comfort zone. That is how you get great.

At the end of the day, nobody sat their way to greatness. Nobody sat back and relaxed and became extraordinary. The only people who really achieve, the only way that humans are able to do the extraordinary things that we’re able to do is by going to that breaking point and then beyond.

But you have to find something in there you want that badly. There’s no way to just do it. You’ve got to find something in you that you believe in so much, that you’re willing to push yourself that hard.

So you’ve got to construct a story about, not only who you are, but what you can become. And when that narrative is so compelling, that it pushes you forward, then you will have the kind of change that you want in your life. But first, you have to believe that you can do it. You’ve got to put yourself out there. You’ve got to grind and work. But to do that, to work that hard, to make those kinds of changes, you’ve got to be willing to test yourself.

You’ve got to be willing to look inside yourself and find out who you really are. You’ve got to be willing to stare nakedly at your inadequacies and be willing to push through them.

You can’t pretend. You’ve gotta really look at your results and see if you’re making the progress that you want to make. And that’s where a lot of people fail. They lie to themselves, they want to get away with something. They want to see if anybody’s looking,

but the reality is the only thing that matters in this life, what do you think about yourself, when you’re by yourself?

There’s no campaigning, there’s no convincing anybody. There’s only the credibility that you’ve either earned with yourself or not, and the hard truth is that self-worth comes from doing something worthy. It comes from the hard things, it comes from the suffering. It comes from persevering.

When things get difficult to know what you want and to stay that course even when everything else is trying to knock you off. So build that thing, build that thing in your life. Build that belief, know that you can do it, and be willing to go through hell to get to the other side. To get to the person that you were always meant to be. It won’t be easy, but it sure as hell is possible.

Transcript: YOU CAN CHANGE – Tom Bilyeu

We all need a word of encouragement from time to time, so I want this to be that word. So, let me tell you what I know.

You can change, no matter what you think of yourself. Humans are designed to change. That’s what we do. But you have to put yourself underneath tremendous stress in order to trigger that adaptation response.

But if you know what direction you want to move in, if you know what you want to become, you can change into that. And so, holding onto the fears and the doubts and the worries, they’re not serving you. And looping around that mentally and wondering if you’re going to make it and practicing mentally how you’re gonna deal with the failure, how you would justify it to people, all of that is stopping you from doing the one thing that actually will work.

Trying, practicing, training, falling down. Those are the very things you need to do, the very simple act of taking action. That’s the thing that you have to focus on. If you do that, then you’ll be able to trigger your ability to change.

So, I don’t need you to believe that you’re capable of something extraordinary now, and I know in your heart you have that dream, you have that small flicker of a belief that you can do it. That if you just try, that you could figure it out, and that’s what I want you to focus on.

You could figure it out. Not that you already know how to do it. I fully accept that you don’t. I fully accept that most of the things that I want to do with my life and will go onto do, I’m not yet capable of but I so believe in the human ability to change. Not even something that’s unique to myself, just the human ability to change. That if I simply walk that path of doing, of trying, of failing, and learning, that on a long enough timeline, I will win. So, whatever it is that you’re thinking about doing right now, I want to be that voice in your head that says you can do it. Maybe not today but you can do it.

You can become capable of that thing that you want, that you so dream about that would give you that sense of self pride that you want, that you hunger for. And I will say this, be proud even if you never reach it, as long as you try.

So go out right now, stop this, stop listening to this, stop whatever you’re doing, and get out there and try. Do it and remember that it is a process of adaptation and to go through that process you must get under stress. It’s the only way that you’ll grow but you can do it. You can grow, you can become whatever you want.

Transcript: BUILD YOUR WORTH – Tom Bilyeu

No one will ever hate you with the intensity that you can hate yourself, and that’s why you absolutely must take the time to build your self-worth.

And I really wish that building your self-worth was simply as easy as repeating to yourself that you love yourself, but it’s not. The reality is if you want to love yourself you have to do something that is worthy of that love.

You have to do something that you believe in. You have to find a way to build credibility with yourself, to tell yourself you’re going to do something and know that you’re actually going to see it through.

The reality is we’re all watching ourselves all the time. We know how we behave. And so you really have to think about that. I want it to be enough. I want it to be enough that you exist and that you’re going to be okay simply because you are. But the reality is we don’t look at life like that and we do judge ourselves and we do think about whether or not we’re following through on the things that we said we were going to do.

And it’s okay to start small. It’s okay not to have a grand dream. It’s okay not to be able to do that yet. It is very okay not to be extraordinary. You don’t need that to love yourself. But what you do need is purpose.

What you do need is to take that time to define what is it that you’re trying to do with your life. Why do you matter? What is it that you’re going to be able to bring to yourself and to the world and it doesn’t have to be big? It just has to be real. It has to be something that’s true to you. It has to be something that you’re willing to commit to.

And once you’re willing to commit to it, to put in the energy every day to get up and pursue that thing, and again this is not me, I’m not judging you, I can really tell you, I love you and it’s enough that you just exist. But I know that in your head, in all of our heads, is a voice that says that just isn’t true.

And so to connect with ourselves and to find that meaning and to develop it, to create meaning in our lives, we have to set an intention and we have to pursue that intention.

Start small, know what you want, get out of bed, get after it, set rules for yourself, follow those rules.

Once you start doing those simple things, and again they don’t have to be big, but once you start setting a rule, having an intention, following your rules, building towards that intention, suddenly you’re going to earn that credibility with yourself.

And then all of the sudden no matter what anybody says to you, and they are going to say negative things, haters are going to come after you, that is just a reality of life, but you will be impervious to that if you have built within you belief, belief that you are worthy because you take small steps every day to do something that means something to you.

It doesn’t matter what other people think but it matters a lot what you think about yourself, so every day earn that worth.

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11 TED Talks About Self-Worth and Confidence You Have To Watch

• Published on July 15, 2020
• by The Mom Trotter
• in Lifestyle

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Finding self-love is an essential step to having a better relationship with ourselves. Being able to embrace ourselves and be content with who we are is one of the single most powerful things we can do, because loving and accepting who you are will ultimate play a huge role in every single aspect of our lives.

The problem is, getting to that point isn’t always easy. In fact, it can be really, really hard, especially when we’ve grown up in a society that has always conditioned us to feel otherwise.

We take it you’re here because you’re currently in a self-love journey and we are so proud of you for taking that step. We rounded up some of the most powerful, rawest TED Talks out there about all things self-love, including difficult journeys, unbiased tips, and more!

Ted Talks About Self-Worth and Confidence

Here a great list below for you:

Cultivating Unconditional Self-Worth by Adia Gooden

The pursuit of perfection is the most effective way to wind up feeling like a failure when you shouldn’t, and Adia Gooden knows this from experience. Not only does Adia share insightful information from working as a psychologist on her TED Talk, but she isn’t afraid to share her experience breaking her negative patterns to set herself free.

Watch this TED Talk on Youtube

The Person You Really Need To Marry

Not only is Tracy McMillan one of the writers behind famous TV shows like United States of Tara and Mad Men, but she’s also an author, a dating coach on NBC’s Ready For Love, and a mom!

Her love life hasn’t always gone as a planned, and after three divorces, she decided to take control of her life story script and marry the most unlikely person… herself.

Removing Negative Self-Talk by Abria Joseph

Negative self-talk is one of the most toxic habits some of us are guilty of. The words we choose to speak to ourselves have more power than we realize, and Abria Joseph’s TED Talk will help you become more aware of how having kinder conversations with yourself can ultimately have an enormous impact on your life and goals.

I Searched  4 It Blinded: The power of self-love and self-esteem  by Caira Lee

Caira is an award-winning slam poet and a firm believer in the power of self-love. On her talk, she poetically shares how we can achieve love towards ourselves through doing what we love to do and standing up for what we care most about.

She also dives into how our bodies, race, size, and sexual orientation are all something we should embrace instead of “fix”.

The Antidote To Low Self-Esteem by Alicia Thompson

Hailing from Jamaica, Alicia Thompson is the founder of Artistry is Ministry and she has spent her life using the arts to uplift and inspire young generations, especially women struggling with lack of self-worth.

Alicia knows and understands the impact that beauty standards these days can have on young girls and it’s her goal to break those patterns.

Listen to this TED Talk on Youtube

The Magic of Not Giving a F*** By Sarah Knight

Best-selling author of The Life-Changing Magic of Not Giving a F*uck and Get Your Sh*t Together shares a step-by-step method to stop spending time doing things you don’t like doing in a raw and hilarious way. 

Warning: Strong language

The Power of Vulnerability by Brené Brown

As a researcher and storyteller, Brené has spent her life studying human connections and our ability to be empathetic and compassionate. 

On this TED Talks, she shares one of the biggest lessons she’s come to learn throughout her career, and that is how our sense of worthiness is best achieved when we have the courage to allow ourselves to become vulnerable, show compassion towards others, and seek real, raw human connections.

How I Lost My Identity But Found My Worth by Jeannie Woller

Ever wondered who you actually are? You may have even answered that question in an honest way, but how many times has your identity changed over the years?

As things in our life begin, end, and shift, the natural components of who are tend to change as well, and that can be, quite frankly, a pretty terrifying and confusing transition. 

As a fresh college graduate and former soccer player, Jeannie knows the sentiment well, and she shares how, in the process of becoming her most vulnerable self, she was able to catch glimpses of the person she could ultimately become.

Stop Sabotaging by Debi Silber

On her TED Talk, Debi Silber shares how freedom is achieved when we realize that the pain of staying where we are is greater than our fear of the unknown.

Debi believes that life is at the end of our comfort zone, and she shares how most of us tend to sacrifice ourselves and our greatest desires out of fear of leaving our safe, comfortable place.

Why Thinking You’re Ugly Is Bad For You by Meaghan Ramsey

“When did we stop loving ourselves?” is the powerful question Meaghan emphasizes on this TED Talk.

It’s no secret that our image plays a huge impact on our sense of self-worth, but why is that? Is focusing on our flaws and spending days on end wishing we could change our bodies a healthy way to live?

If you’re struggling with your body image and are in for a difficult, but absolutely necessary conversation, this TED Talk is a must for you.

Learning to Love Yourself by Amanda Jetté Knox

On this TED Talk, Amanda gets raw and honest about her childhood and youth, both of which were filled with struggles and heartbreaking moments.

Today, Amanda believes that loving yourself is the single most powerful thing you can do for every aspect of your life, but she also understand how some of the things that life throws our way can easily crack that.

Amanda’s talk is as raw and inspiring as it gets, and this is a must-watch if you have a hard time balancing a healthy relationship with food and self-image.

Bottom Line on Ted Talks About Self-Worth & Confidence

I hope this list of ted talks about self worth and confidence will give you the boost you need today. Sometimes we all need a boost to get back on track, and this may be exactly what you need.

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“Your outlook on life is a direct reflection on how much you like yourself.” ~ Lululemon

“My existence on this earth is pointless.”

That thought crossed my mind every night before I fell asleep.

It had been several months since I graduated from high school and I had no idea what I was going to do with my life. My future plans were falling to pieces, and everyone around me kept telling me that I needed to start accomplishing things that I had not yet accomplished.

I was not where I thought I should be in life. Everyone had expectations that I hadn’t met. I became too focused on becoming a version of myself that everyone else wanted, and I constantly compared myself to other people who had already taken the dive into the next chapter of their life.

I was relentlessly questioned and judged for my slower progression in life, which convinced me that no one supported me or believed in me. I wondered why I even bothered to exist if I was getting nowhere and disappointing everyone. I began to blame everyone but myself for the state of misery I had fallen into.

My self-esteem began to suffer as the months went by. I felt inferior to everyone and it made me hate myself. I still did not know what I wanted to do with my life—and I was starting to not even care.

But several months and hundreds of needless self insults later, I decided to block out the negativity , both from myself and other people. I silenced the voice in my head that told me I wasn’t good enough and asked myself what would really make me happy.

I’ve always been very creative and expressive. I used to sing, act, and dance when I was younger. But my favorite thing has always been writing.

Some of the happiest moments in my life came from opportunities to express myself or put my heart and soul out for everyone to see. Every path I tried to take always led me back to writing.

I got to a point where I realized that I was only trying to pursue other paths because I thought that’s what other people would accept. I was afraid that if I let my imagination soar to all the different possibilities, people would tear me down or tell me to be “realistic.”

The bottom line is that I became paralyzed with this fear of not being accepted. I was afraid to be different or go my own way and pursue what truly made me happy. I put myself in a box.

One day, I decided that enough was enough. I spent an entire year of my life trying to be “realistic” and conform to the expectations of other people. I realized that you can’t please everyone anyway, so trying will definitely not lead to contentment.

Real happiness comes from being content with and proud of yourself .

I finally decided that I was going to devote my time to learning about writing and working on my writing skills. I am happy with that decision and I feel better about myself because I made it for me.

I have learned a few things about choosing the right path for yourself, focusing on what will make you happy. If you’ve been struggling to make that choice, I recommend:

Drop your worries.

Worry puts a burden on your mind, body, and spirit. They can keep you up all night if you let them. Find comfort in the fact that everything happens for a reason and everything will fall into place at the right time.

During my period of low self-esteem and extreme uncertainty, I relentlessly questioned every aspect of my life. I would go to bed frustrated and upset as I told myself I wasn’t good enough, and that I wished I was like everyone else my age.

By constantly bashing yourself and worrying about every single thing that happens to you, you’re missing out on happiness that you could’ve had all along.

Do not try to please or impress anyone but yourself.

The need to impress, please, and compare ourselves to other people all the time is one of the most common causes of self-loathing. As long as you’re trying to please other people and live up to their expectations, you will not be pleasing yourself.

What I’ve learned is that happiness does not come from pleasing other people. Happiness comes from feeling content with your own life and goals.

Embrace your unique qualities and talents.

Everyone is different. Figure out what you’re good at and what sets you apart from everyone else. Your mission is to create a reason for being here.

Believe in your path.

When you start to figure out what you want in life, there will be obstacles. Do not let anyone or anything discourage you from continuing on. Believe in yourself and believe in your decisions.

Stay positive and keep moving forward.

Take your time.

Life does not come with a rulebook or deadlines for accomplishing certain things. I used to always think that I needed to be at the same level as everyone else my age. Life is not a race or a contest.

Have faith in the fact that you are exactly where you need to be at this very moment in time and as long as you’re content, don’t let anyone convince you that you’re not where you need to be. You be the judge of what you want to change in your life and then do it for you .

Surround yourself with positivity.

Try to limit the amount of time you spend with people who nay-say, judge, or ridicule. Choose to completely surround yourself with positive, inspiring influences. You will feel much happier and better about yourself if you do.

Make a list of sayings or quotes that make you feel encouraged or inspired and keep it where you can see it each day. Try putting the list under your pillow or on your refrigerator door.

The most important thing to remember is that you are worth it, you can go another day, and you can be happy. Life will not throw you anything you cannot handle or overcome.

Once you start to accept and love yourself and your desired path, the smoke will clear and you will breathe easy again. Be kind to yourself and life will be a whole lot brighter.

Photo by QuinnDombrowsky

About Madison Sonnier

Madison is a writer of feelings and lover of animals, music, nature and creativity. You can follow her blog at journeyofasoulsearcher.blogspot.com/ and buy her first eBook through Amazon . She loves making new friends, so be sure to say hi if you like what you see!

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What is Self-Worth & How Do We Build it? (Incl. Worksheets)

There’s self-esteem, self-compassion, self-acceptance, self-respect, self-confidence, self-love, self-care, and so on.

There are so many words to describe how we feel about ourselves, how we think about ourselves, and how we act toward ourselves. It’s understandable if they all start to blend together for you; however, they are indeed different concepts with unique meanings, findings, and purposes.

Read on to learn more about what may be the most vital “self-” concept of them all: self-worth.

Before you read on, we thought you might like to download our three Self-Compassion Exercises for free . These detailed, science-based exercises will not only help you show more compassion and kindness to yourself but will also give you the tools to help your clients, students or employees improve their self-compassion and realize their worth.

This Article Contains:

What is the meaning of self-worth and self-value, the psychology of self-worth.

• What Is Self-Worth Theory?

What Determines Self-Worth?

3 examples of healthy self-worth, how to find self-worth and value yourself more, the importance of self-worth in relationships, the risks of tying your self-worth to your job, the self-worth scale, 5 activities and exercises for developing self-worth, 2 worksheets that help increase self-worth, meditations to boost self-worth, recommended books on self-worth, must-watch ted talks and youtube videos, 12 quotes on self-worth, a take-home message.

Self-worth and self-value are two related terms that are often used interchangeably. Having a sense of self-worth means that you value yourself, and having a sense of self-value means that you are worthy. The differences between the two are minimal enough that both terms can be used to describe the same general concept.

However, we’ll provide both definitions so you can see where they differ.

Self-worth is defined by Merriam-Webster as:

“a feeling that you are a good person who deserves to be treated with respect”.

On the other hand, self-value is “more behavioral than emotional, more about how you act toward what you value, including yourself, than how you feel about yourself compared to others” (Stosny, 2014).

Self-Worth versus Self-Esteem

Similarly, there is not a huge difference between self-worth and self-esteem , especially for those who are not professionals in the field of psychology. In fact, the first definition of self-worth on the Merriam-Webster dictionary website is simply “self-esteem.”

Similarly, the World Book Dictionary definition of self-esteem is “thinking well of oneself; self-respect,” while self-worth is defined as “a favorable estimate or opinion of oneself; self-esteem” (Bogee, Jr., 1998).

Clearly, many of these terms are used to talk about the same ideas, but for those deeply immersed in these concepts, there is a slight difference. Dr. Christina Hibbert explains this:

“Self-esteem is what we think and feel and believe about ourselves. Self-worth is recognizing ‘I am greater than all of those things.’ It is a deep knowing that I am of value, that I am loveable, necessary to this life, and of incomprehensible worth.” (2013).

Self-Worth versus Self-Confidence

In the same vein, there are subtle but significant differences between self-worth and self-confidence.

Self-confidence is not an overall evaluation of yourself, but a feeling of confidence and competence in more specific areas. For example, you could have a high amount of self-worth but low self-confidence when it comes to extreme sports, certain subjects in school, or your ability to speak a new language (Roberts, 2012).

It’s not necessary to have a high sense of self-confidence in every area of your life; there are naturally some things that you will simply not be very good at, and other areas in which you will excel. The important thing is to have self-confidence in the activities in your life that matter to you and a high sense of self-worth overall.

We explore this further in The Science of Self-Acceptance Masterclass© .

Download 3 Free Self-Compassion Exercises (PDF)

These detailed, science-based exercises will equip you to help others create a kinder and more nurturing relationship with themselves.

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By filling out your name and email address below.

What Is the Self-Worth Theory?

The self-worth theory posits that an individual’s main priority in life is to find self-acceptance and that self-acceptance is often found through achievement (Covington & Beery, 1976). In turn, achievement is often found through competition with others.

Thus, the logical conclusion is that competing with others can help us feel like we have impressive achievements under our belt, which then makes us feel proud of ourselves and enhances our acceptance of ourselves.

The theory holds that there are four main elements of the self-worth model:

• Performance;
• Self-worth.

The first three interact with each other to determine one’s level of self-worth. One’s ability and effort predictably have a big impact on performance, and all three contribute to one’s feeling of worth and value.

While this theory represents a good understanding of self-worth as we tend to experience it, it is unfortunate that we place so much emphasis on our achievements. Aside from competing and “winning” against others, there are many factors that can contribute to our sense of self-worth.

However, people commonly use other yardsticks to measure their self-worth. Here are five of the top factors that people use to measure and compare their own self-worth to the worth of others:

• Appearance—whether measured by the number on the scale, the size of clothing worn, or the kind of attention received by others;
• Net worth—this can mean income, material possessions, financial assets, or all of the above;
• Who you know/your social circle—some people judge their own value and the value of others by their status and what important and influential people they know;
• What you do/your career—we often judge others by what they do; for example, a stockbroker is often considered more successful and valuable than a janitor or a teacher;
• What you achieve—as noted earlier, we frequently use achievements to determine someone’s worth (whether it’s our own worth or someone else’s), such as success in business, scores on the SATs, or placement in a marathon or other athletic challenge (Morin, 2017).

Author Stephanie Jade Wong (n.d.) is on a mission to correct misunderstandings and misperceptions about self-worth. Instead of listing all the factors that go into self-worth, she outlines what does not determine your self-worth (or, what should not determine your self-worth):

• Your to-do list: Achieving goals is great and it feels wonderful to cross off things on your to-do list, but it doesn’t have a direct relationship with your worth as a human;
• Your job: It doesn’t matter what you do. What matters is that you do it well and that it fulfills you;
• Your social media following: It also doesn’t matter how many people think you are worthy of a follow or a retweet. It can be enlightening and healthy to consider the perspectives of others, but their opinions have no impact on our innate value;
• Your age: You aren’t too young or too old for anything. Your age is simply a number and does not factor into your value as a human being;
• Other people: As noted above, it doesn’t matter what other people think or what other people have done or accomplished. Your personal satisfaction and fulfillment are much more important than what others are thinking, saying, or doing;
• How far you can run: Your mile run time is one of the least important factors for your self-worth (or for anything else, for that matter). If you enjoy running and feel fulfilled by improving your time, good for you! If not, good for you! Your ability to run does not determine your self-worth;
• Your grades: We all have different strengths and weaknesses, and some of us are simply not cut out for class. This has no bearing on our value as people, and a straight-A student is just as valuable and worthy as a straight-F student or a dropout;
• The number of friends you have: Your value as a human has absolutely nothing to do with how many friends or connections you have. The quality of your relationships is what’s really important;
• Your relationship status: Whether flying solo, casually dating, or in a committed relationship, your value is exactly the same—your relationship status doesn’t alter your worth;
•  The money (or lack thereof) in the bank: If you have enough money to physically survive (which can, in fact, be $0), then you have already achieved the maximal amount of “worth” you can get from money (hint: it’s 0!);
• Your likes: It doesn’t matter if you have “good taste” or not, if your friends and acquaintances think you’re sophisticated, or if you have an eye for the finer things. Your worth is the same either way.
• Anything or anyone but yourself: Here we get to the heart of the matter—you are the only one who determines your self-worth. If you believe you are worthy and valuable, you are worthy and valuable. Even if you don’t believe you are worthy and valuable, guess what—you still are worthy and valuable!

“ If I succeed at this, I will feel more valuable as a person. ”

Have you ever had a similar thought? You are certainly not alone. While objectively, your worth is not conditional on anything, most of us constantly evaluate our worth as human beings.

Blascovich and Tomaka (1991) describe self-esteem as the extent to which an individual evaluates themselves favorably. Consequently, the core process underlying self-esteem is self-evaluation, and people use many standards and domains to determine their worthiness (Crocker & Wolfe, 2001).

Domains represent the areas where people believe success means that they are wonderful or worthwhile, and failure means that they are worthless (Crocker & Wolfe, 2001).

For example, the self-worth of person A may be greatly determined by academic performance, while the self-worth of person B may be determined mainly by appearance.

Noticing the domains your use as a frame of reference to determine your self-worth is the first step toward developing more unconditional self-acceptance. The self-reflection questions shared below explore created conditions used to determine ‘worthiness’ and later lead beyond these conditions.

Note that there is a difference between evaluating actions and evaluating personal worth. We can learn from our mistakes and grow as individuals by assessing our efforts. However, by evaluating our personal worth, we can threaten our wellbeing.

You might be thinking, “Okay, I know what does and doesn’t (and shouldn’t) determine self-worth, but what does healthy self-worth really look like?”

Given what we know about the determinants of self-worth, let’s read through a few examples.

Bill is not a great student. He gets mostly Bs and Cs, even when he spends a great deal of time studying. He didn’t get a great score on his SATs, and he’s an average reader, a struggling writer, and nobody’s idea of a mathematician.

Even though Bill wishes he had better grades, he still feels pretty good about himself. He knows that grades aren’t everything and that he’s just as valuable a person as his straight-A friends. Bill has a high sense of self-worth and a realistic view of himself and his abilities.

Next, let’s consider Amy. Amy has a wide variety of interests, including marathons, attending book club, playing weekly trivia with her friends, and meeting new people.

Amy’s not particularly good at running and has never placed in a marathon. She’s a slow reader and frequently misses the symbolism and themes that her fellow book club members pick up on. She only answers about 10% of the trivia questions correctly and leans on her friends’ knowledge quite often. Finally, she loves to talk to new people but sometimes she gets blown off and ignored.

Despite all of this, she still believes that she is worthy and valuable. She knows that her worth as a human is not dependent on her ability to run, read, play trivia, or make new friends. Whether she is great, terrible, or somewhere in between at each of her vast range of chosen activities, she knows she is still worthy of happiness, fulfillment, and love.

Finally, consider the case of Marcus. Marcus is an excellent salesman and frequently outsells most of the other people at his company, but one coworker seems to always be just a bit ahead of him. He is also an avid squash player and frequently competes in tournaments. Sometimes he gets first or second place, but usually he does not place at all.

Even though he is not the best at his job or at his favorite hobby, Marcus still feels that he is valuable. He thinks he is smart, talented, and successful, even though he’s not the smartest, most talented, or most successful, and he’s okay with that.

Bill, Amy, and Marcus all have healthy levels of self-worth. They have varying levels of abilities and talents, and they get a wide range of results from their efforts, but they all understand that what they do is not who they are. No matter whether they win awards or garner accolades for their performance or not, they still have the same high opinion of their value as a person.

There are things you can do to boost your sense of self-worth and ensure that you value yourself like you ought to be valued—as a full, complete, and wonderful human being that is deserving of love and respect, no matter what.

How to build self-worth in adolescents

As with most lifelong traits, it’s best to start early. If you know any adolescents, be sure to encourage them to understand and accept their own self-worth. Reinforce their value as a being rather than a “doing,” as some say—in other words, make sure they know that they are valuable for who they are, not what they do.

If you need some more specific ideas on how to boost an adolescent’s self-worth, check out the suggestions below.

Researchers at Michigan State University recommend two main strategies:

• Provide unconditional love, respect, and positive regard;
• Give adolescents opportunities to experience success (Clark-Jones, 2012).

Showing a teen unconditional love (if you’re a parent, family member, or very close friend) or unconditional respect and positive regard (if you’re a teacher, mentor, etc.) is the best way to teach him self-worth.

If you show a teenager that you love and appreciate her for exactly who and what she is, she will learn that it’s okay to love herself for exactly who and what she is. If you demonstrate that she doesn’t need to achieve anything to earn your love and respect, she’ll be much less likely to put unnecessary parameters on her own self-love and self-respect.

Further, one way in which we gain a healthy sense of self-worth is through early and frequent experiences of success. Successful experiences boost our sense of competency and mastery and make us feel just plain good about ourselves.

Successful experiences also open the door for taking healthy risks and the success that often follows. Don’t just tell a teen that she is worthy and valuable, help her believe it by giving her every opportunity to succeed.

Just be sure that these opportunities are truly opportunities for her to succeed on her own—a helping hand is fine, but we need to figure out how to do some things on our own to build a healthy sense of self-worth (Clark-Jones, 2012).

How to increase self-worth and self-value in adults

It’s a bit trickier to increase self-worth and self-value in adults, but it’s certainly not a lost cause. Check out the two tips below to learn how to go about it.

First, take a look back at the list of what does not determine self-worth. Remind yourself that your bank account, job title, attractiveness, and social media following have nothing to do with how valuable or worthy a person you are.

It’s easy to get caught up in chasing money, status, and popularity—especially when these things are highly valued by those around us and by society in general—but make an effort to take a step back and think about what truly matters when determining people’s worth: their kindness, compassion, empathy, respect for others, and how well they treat those around them.

Second, work on identifying, challenging, and externalizing your critical inner voice. We all have an inner critic that loves to nitpick and point out our flaws (Firestone, 2014). It’s natural to let this inner critic get the best of us sometimes, but if we let her win too often she starts to think that she’s right!

Whenever you notice your inner critic start to fire up with the criticisms, make her pause for a moment. Ask yourself whether she has any basis in fact, whether she’s being kind or not, and whether what she’s telling you is something you need to know. If none of those things are true, feel free to tell her to see herself out!

Challenge her on the things she whispers in your ear and remind her that no matter what you do or don’t do, you are worthy and valuable all the same.

For more specific activities and ideas, see the exercises, activities, and worksheets we cover later in this piece.

It’s an understandable tendency to let someone else’s love for you encourage you to feel better about yourself. However, you should work on feeling good about yourself whether you are in a relationship or not.

The love of another person does not define you, nor does it define your value as a person. Whether you are single, casually seeing people, building a solid relationship with someone, or celebrating your 30th wedding anniversary with your spouse, you are worthy of love and respect, and you should make time to practice self-acceptance and self-compassion.

This is true for people of any relationship status, but it may be especially important for those in long-term relationships.

Don’t make the mistake of thinking that your partner’s love is what makes you worthy of love. If anything ever happens to your partner or to your relationship, you don’t want to be forced to build up your sense of worth from scratch. It can make breakups and grief much harder than they need to be.

Although this facet of the issue might be enough to encourage you to work on your self-worth, there’s another reason it’s important: Having a healthy sense of self-worth will actually make your current relationship better too.

When you learn to love yourself, you become better able to love someone else. People with high self-respect tend to have more satisfying, loving, and stable relationships than those who do not, precisely because they know that they need to first find their worth, esteem, and happiness within themselves.

Two people who are lit with self-worth and happiness from within make are much brighter than two people who are trying to absorb light from each other (Grande, 2018).

Similar to the dangers of anchoring your self-worth to someone else, there are big risks in tying your self-worth to your job. Like a significant other, jobs can come and go—sometimes without warning.

You can be let go, laid off, transitioned, dehired, dismissed, downsized, redirected, released, selectively separated, terminated, replaced, asked to resign, or just plain fired. You could also be transferred, promoted, demoted, or given new duties and responsibilities that no longer mesh with the sense of self-worth your previous duties and responsibilities gave you.

You could also quit, take a new job, take some time off, or retire—all things that can be wonderful life transitions, but that can be unnecessarily difficult if you base too much of your self-worth on your job.

As noted earlier, your job is one of the things that don’t define you or your worth. There’s nothing wrong with being proud of what you do, finding joy or fulfillment in it, or letting it shape who you are; the danger is in letting it define your entire sense of self.

We are all so much more than a job. Believing that we are nothing more than a job is detrimental to our wellbeing and can be disastrous in times of crisis.

If so, you’re in luck. There is a scale that is perfectly suited for this curiosity.

Also known as the Contingencies of Self-Worth Scale, this scale was developed by researchers Crocker, Luhtanen, Cooper, and Bouvrette in 2003. It consists of 35 items that measure self-worth in seven different domains. These seven domains, with an example item from each domain, are:

• Approval from others (i.e., I don’t care if other people have a negative opinion of me);
• Physical appearance (i.e., my self-esteem is influenced by how attractive I think my face or facial features are);
• Outdoing others in competition (i.e., my self-worth is affected by how well I do when I am competing with others);
• Academic competence (i.e., I feel bad about myself whenever my academic performance is lacking);
• Family love and support (i.e., my self-worth is not influenced by the quality of my relationships with my family members);
• Being a virtuous or moral person (i.e., my self-esteem depends on whether or not I follow my moral/ethical principles);
• God’s love (i.e., my self-esteem would suffer if I didn’t have God’s love).

Each item is rated on a scale from 1 (strongly disagree) to 7 (strongly agree). Once you have rated each item, sum the answers to the five items for each domain and divide the total by 5 for the sub-scale score.

To learn more about this scale or use it to determine your own self-worth, click here .

According to author and self-growth guru Adam Sicinski, there are five vital exercises for developing and maintaining self-worth. He lays them out in five stages, but there’s no need to keep them in strict order; it’s fine to move back and forth or revisit stages.

1. Increase your self-understanding

An important activity on the road to self-worth is to build self-understanding. You need to learn who you are and what you want before you can decide you are a worthy human being.

Sicinski recommends this simple thought experiment to work on increasing your understanding of yourself:

• Imagine that everything you have is suddenly taken away from you (i.e., possessions, relationships, friendships, status, job/career, accomplishments and achievements, etc.);
• Ask yourself the following questions: a. What if everything I have was suddenly taken away from me? b. What if all I had left was just myself? c. How would that make me feel? d. What would I actually have that would be of value?
•  Think about your answers to these questions and see if you can come to this conclusion: “No matter what happens externally and no matter what’s taken away from me, I’m not affected internally”;
• Next, get to know yourself on a deeper level with these questions: a. Who I am? I am . . . I am not . . . b. How am I? c. How am I in the world? d. How do others see me? e. How do others speak about me? f. What key life moments define who I am today? g. What brings me the most passion, fulfillment, and joy?
• Once you have a good understanding of who you are and what fulfills and satisfies you, it’s time to look at what isn’t so great or easy about being you. Ask yourself these questions: a. Where do I struggle most? b. Where do I need to improve? c. What fears often hold me back? d. What habitual emotions hurt me? e. What mistakes do I tend to make? f. Where do I tend to consistently let myself down?
•  Finally, take a moment to look at the flipside; ask yourself: a. What abilities do I have? b. What am I really good at?

Spend some time on each step, but especially on the steps that remind you of your worth and your value as a person (e.g., the strengths step).

2. Boost your self-acceptance

Once you have a better idea of who you are, the next step is to enhance your acceptance of yourself.

Start by forgiving yourself for anything you noted in item 5 above. Think of any struggles, needs for improvement, mistakes, and bad habits you have, and commit to forgiving yourself and accepting yourself without judgment or excuses.

Think about everything you learned about yourself in the first exercise and repeat these statements:

• I accept the good, the bad and the ugly;
• I fully accept every part of myself including my flaws, fears, behaviors, and qualities I might not be too proud of;
• This is how I am, and I am at peace with that

3. Enhance your self-love

Now that you have worked on accepting yourself for who you are, you can begin to build love and care for yourself. Make it a goal to extend yourself kindness, tolerance, generosity, and compassion .

To boost self-love, start paying attention to the tone you use with yourself. Commit to being more positive and uplifting when talking to yourself.

If you’re not sure how to get started, think (or say aloud) these simple statements:

• I feel valued and special;
• I love myself wholeheartedly;
•  I am a worthy and capable person (Sicinski, n.d.).

4. Recognize your self-worth

Once you understand, accept, and love yourself, you will reach a point where you no longer depend on people, accomplishments, or other external factors for your self-worth.

At this point, the best thing you can do is recognize your worth and appreciate yourself for the work you’ve done to get here, as well as continuing to maintain your self-understanding, self-acceptance, self-love, and self-worth.

To recognize your self-worth, remind yourself that:

• You no longer need to please other people;
• No matter what people do or say, and regardless of what happens outside of you, you alone control how you feel about yourself;
• You have the power to respond to events and circumstances based on your internal sources, resources, and resourcefulness, which are the reflection of your true value;
• Your value comes from inside, from an internal measure that you’ve set for yourself.

5. Take responsibility for yourself

In this stage, you will practice being responsible for yourself, your circumstances, and your problems.

Follow these guidelines to ensure you are working on this exercise in a healthy way:

• Take full responsibility for everything that happens to you without giving your personal power and your agency away;
• Acknowledge that you have the personal power to change and influence the events and circumstances of your life.

Remind yourself of what you have learned through all of these exercises, and know that you hold the power in your own life. Revel in your well-earned sense of self-worth and make sure to maintain it.

Check out the four worksheets below that can help you build your self-worth.

About Me Sentence Completion Worksheet

This worksheet outlines a simple way to build self-worth. It only requires a pen or pencil and a few minutes to complete. Feel free to use it for yourself or for your adult clients, but it was designed for kids and can be especially effective for them.

This worksheet is simply titled “About Me: Sentence Completion” and is exactly what you might expect: it gives kids a chance to write about themselves. If your youngster is too young to write down his own answers, sit with him and help him record his responses.

The sentence stems (or prompts) to complete include:

• I was really happy when . . .
• Something that my friends like about me is . . .
• I’m proud of . . .
• My family was happy when I . . .
• In school, I’m good at . . .
• Something that makes me unique is . . .

By completing these six prompts, your child will take some time to think about who he really is, what he likes, what he’s good at, and what makes him feel happy.

Self-Esteem Sentence Stems worksheet.

Self-Esteem Checkup

This worksheet is good for a wide audience, including children, adolescents, young adults, and older adults. The opening text indicates that it’s a self-esteem worksheet, but in this case, the terms self-esteem and self-worth are used interchangeably.

Completing this worksheet will help you get a handle on your personal sense of understanding, acceptance, respect, and love for yourself.

The worksheet lists 15 statements and instructs you to rate your belief in each one on a scale from 0 (not at all) to 10 (totally or completely). These statements are:

• I believe in myself;
• I am just as valuable as other people;
• I would rather be me than someone else;
• I am proud of my accomplishments;
• I feel good when I get compliments;
• I can handle criticism;
• I am good at solving problems;
• I love trying new things;
• I respect myself;
• I like the way I look;
• I love myself even when others reject me;
• I know my positive qualities;
• I focus on my successes and not my failures;
• I’m not afraid to make mistakes;
• I am happy to be me.

Add up all of the ratings for these 15 statements to get your total score, then rate your overall sense of self-esteem on a scale from 0 (I completely dislike who I am) to 10 (I completely like who I am).

Finally, respond to the prompt “What would need to change in order for you to move up one point on the rating scale? (i.e., for example, if you rated yourself a 6 what would need to happen for you to be at a 7?)”

Click here to preview this worksheet for yourself or click here to view it in a collection of self-esteem-building, small-group counseling lesson plans.

If you’re a fan of meditations , check out the four options below. They’re all aimed at boosting self-worth:

• A Guided Meditation to Help Quiet Self-Doubt and Boost Confidence from Health.com;
• Guided Meditation for Inner Peace and Self-Worth from Linda Hall;
• Guided Meditation: Self-Esteem from The Honest Guys Meditations & Relaxations;

If you’re not fond of any of these four meditations, try searching for other guided meditations intended to improve your self-worth. There are many out there to choose from.

To learn more about self-worth and how to improve it, check out some of the most popular books about this subject on Amazon:

• The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are by Dr. Brené Brown ( Amazon );
• What to Say When You Talk to Your Self by Dr. Shad Helmstetter ( Amazon );
• The 21-Day Self-Love Challenge: Learn How to Love Yourself Unconditionally, Cultivate Confidence, Self-Compassion & Self-Worth   by Sophia Taylor ( Amazon );
• Love Yourself: 31 Ways to Truly Find Your Self Worth & Love Yourself by Randy Young ( Amazon );
• Self-Worth Essentials: A Workbook to Understand Yourself, Accept Yourself, Like Yourself, Respect Yourself, Be Confident, Enjoy Yourself, and Love Yourself by Dr. Liisa Kyle ( Amazon );
• Learning to Love Yourself: Finding Your Self-Worth by Sharon Wegscheider-Cruse ( Amazon ).

If you’re more of a watcher than a reader, there are some great TED Talks and YouTube videos you can check out, including:

TED Talk: Meet Yourself: A User’s Guide to Building Self-Esteem  by Niko Everett

In her talk, Niko Everett, the founder of the organization Girls for Change, discusses inspiring ways to build up your self-esteem.

TED Talk: Claiming Your Identity by Understanding Your Self-Worth by Helen Whitener

Judge Helen Whitener discusses self-worth through the lens of social justice and equality in this talk.

A Clever Lesson in Self Worth from Meir Kay

Sometimes all we need to kickstart or motivate us to work on our self-love and self-worth is a good, insightful quote. If that’s what you’re looking for, read on.

You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.

A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.

Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.

Eleanor Roosevelt

Loving ourselves works miracles in our lives.

Louise L. Hay

The fact that someone else loves you doesn’t rescue you from the project of loving yourself.

Sahaj Kohli

Why should we worry about what others think of us, do we have more confidence in their opinions than we do our own?

Brigham Young

Don’t rely on someone else for your happiness and self-worth. Only you can be responsible for that. If you can’t love and respect yourself—no on else will be able to make that happen. Accept who you are—completely; the good and the bad—and make changes as YOU see fit—not because you think someone else want you to be different.

Stacey Charter

Your problem is you’re afraid to acknowledge your own beauty. You’re too busy holding onto your unworthiness.

It’s surprising how many persons go through life without ever recognizing that their feelings toward other people are largely determined by their feelings toward themselves, and if you’re not comfortable within yourself, you can’t be comfortable with others.

Sidney J. Harris

Most of the shadows of this life are caused by standing in one’s own sunshine.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

It is never too late to be what you might have been.

George Eliot

Stay true to yourself. An original is worth more than a copy.

Suzy Kassem

17 Exercises To Foster Self-Acceptance and Compassion

Help your clients develop a kinder, more accepting relationship with themselves using these 17 Self-Compassion Exercises [PDF] that promote self-care and self-compassion.

Created by Experts. 100% Science-based.

Self-worth is an important concept for both researchers and laymen to understand, and it’s especially important for us to be able to identify, build, and maintain a normal, healthy sense of self-worth.

Learning about self-worth can teach you how to be more happy and fulfilled in your authentic, loveable self.

What do you think is the most important takeaway from research on this topic? Do you think a lack of self-worth is a problem? Or perhaps you think an excess of self-worth is the bigger problem today? Let us know in the comments section.

We hope you enjoyed reading this article. Don’t forget to download our three Self Compassion Exercises for free .

• Blascovich, J., & Tomaka, J. (1991). Measures of self-esteem.  Measures of Personality and Social Psychological Attitudes, 1,  115-160.
• Bogee, Jr., L. (1998). Leadership through personal awareness. University of Hawaii. Retrieved from http://www.hawaii.edu/intlrel/LTPA/selfwort.htm
• Clark-Jones, T. (2012). The importance of helping teens discover self-worth. Michigan State University – MSU Extension. Retrieved from http://www.canr.msu.edu/news/the_importance_of_helping_teens_discover_self-worth
• Covington, M. V., & Beery, R. G. (1976). Self-worth and school learning. Oxford, UK: Holt, Rinehart & Winston.
• Crocker, J., Luhtanen, R. K., Cooper, M. L., & Bouvrette, A. (2003). Contingencies of self-worth in college students: Theory and measurement. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 85 , 894–908.
• Crocker, J., & Wolfe, C. T. (2001). Contingencies of self-worth.  Psychological Review, 108(3), 593.
• Firestone, L. (2014). Essential tips for building true self-worth. Psych Alive. Retrieved from https://www.psychalive.org/self-worth/
• Grande, D. (2018). Building self-esteem and improving relationships. Psychology Today. Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/in-it-together/201801/building-self-esteem-and-improving-relationships
• Hibbert, C. (2013). Self-esteem vs. self-worth. Dr. Christina Hibbert. Retrieved from https://www.drchristinahibbert.com/self-esteem-vs-self-worth/
• Morin, A. (2017). How do you measure your self-worth? Psychology Today. Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/what-mentally-strong-people-dont-do/201707/how-do-you-measure-your-self-worth
• Roberts, E. (2012). The difference between self-esteem and self-confidence. Healthy Place. Retrieved from https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/buildingselfesteem/2012/05/the-difference-between-self-esteem-and-self-confidence
• Sicinski, A. (n.d.). How to build self-worth and start believing in yourself again. IQ Matrix. Retrieved from https://blog.iqmatrix.com/self-worth
• Stosny, S. (2014). How much do you value yourself? Psychology Today. Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/anger-in-the-age-entitlement/201406/how-much-do-you-value-yourself
• Wong, S. J. (n.d.). 13 things that don’t determine your self-worth. Shine. Retrieved from https://advice.shinetext.com/articles/12-things-that-dont-determine-your-self-worth/

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So, you check the appropriate boxes in a worksheet you somehow develop self worth?

This was very helpful, thank you. It encapsulated a lot of topics I wanted to touch on during therapy. Well-researched and written 🙂 Especially love how you linked how most people who struggle with self-worth, struggle with relationships.

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3 Self-Compassion Tools (PDF)

Why self-worth matters, and how to improve it

A positive self-image, including a strong belief in one's abilities, can be a crucial element of mental health, potentially helping us be kinder to ourselves, develop greater confidence, and be more receptive to love. Self-worth generally refers to our  sense of self , our values, and our belief that we are worthy of care, support, and compassion. With a healthy sense of self-worth, we’re often better situated to seize opportunities, develop a high level of self-esteem, and improve our mental well-being. You can improve your self-worth by using affirmations, doing what you love, and finding the good in yourself. Working with a licensed therapist can also be helpful.

What is self-worth?

According to the American Psychological Association,  self-worth  can be defined as “an individual’s evaluation of himself or herself as a valuable, capable human being deserving of respect and consideration.” A healthy sense of self-worth can be valuable to our careers, relationships, and health. However, it can also be something that many people, even those who are highly successful, struggle with. 

The benefits of self-worth

Having a strong sense of self-worth can help you in many facets of life. When you believe you’re deserving of good things, regardless of the circumstances, you may be more likely to ask for what you want, get things done, and nurture healthy relationships. The following may be potential benefits of valuing yourself highly. 

Meet your needs

As we work toward achieving our goals, self-actualizing, or simply living a healthy life, we typically have a running list of things that we must do or acquire. There are generally two ways to have your needs met. First, you can meet them yourself. To do that efficiently, you often must value yourself enough to justify putting in the effort to go after what you need.

The other way to meet your needs may be to work with others. Even when you meet your own needs, there may almost always be someone else involved. However, it can be hard to ask for help if you don’t believe you deserve it. A high level of self-worth can act as a signal to yourself that you’re worthy of having your needs met. 

Solve problems confidently

Complications are likely going to arise in life, whether at work, at home, or in your community. When you experience hardship, a healthy sense of self-worth may help you avoid feeling overwhelmed. With a positive self-image, you may be more likely to accept the challenges life presents. You may be more confident in your abilities and comfortable with the possibility of making mistakes, knowing that no matter what happens, you will still have value as a person.

Be more decisive

Without a positive self-concept, you may doubt your knowledge or ability to judge situations and choose the proper path. You may worry about what may happen if you make the wrong choice, which can lead to indecisiveness and ineffectiveness.

A sense of self-worth is often accompanied by confidence in your abilities, which can help you choose the best course of action. You can decide whether a low-risk, medium-risk, or high-risk option may be best in a specific situation. You can feel comfortable knowing that, however it turns out, your life will still be valuable. 

Maintain healthier relationships

When you feel comfortable with who you are, you may be more open and honest with your loved ones. A high level of honesty can be vital to romantic partnerships, as well as work relationships, friendships, and family relations. It can also help your loved ones to see how highly you value yourself, which may translate into healthy respect on their part as well. 

Set realistic expectations

How to improve your self-worth.

If you’d like to learn how to value yourself more highly, there may be several steps you can take to improve your self-image. The following strategies can help you build your self-worth, enhance your mental well-being, and flourish. 

Use affirmations 

Positive affirmations can be beneficial tools. One way to use affirmations when you're starting with low self-worth may be to make them positive but believable to you. For example, if you want to get a job for which hundreds of people have applied, telling yourself you are going to get the job might seem overwhelming. Instead, you might use an affirmation like, "I deserve to have a good job like this, and I'll keep trying until I get one."

Do what you love

Research suggests that having a sense of purpose can improve mental well-being . Pursuing your passions, whether at work, through hobbies, or by volunteering, can help you reinforce your sense of identity and boost your self-esteem. For instance, someone who enjoys crafting may feel a greater sense of self-sufficiency after finishing a project. Think about the things in life that matter most to you and determine how you can nurture those interests. 

Learn to take compliments

When we reject compliments, we often diminish our accomplishments and devalue ourselves. Say that someone compliments you on a portrait you painted. Instead of seeing it through their eyes, you might look at its flaws. You may focus on the eye color you didn't quite get right or the hair you drew too long. You may not accept the compliment because you may believe you don't deserve it.

What happens when you allow yourself to see the painting through the other person’s eyes may be that you suddenly become aware of the things you've done well in the portrait. You may now notice that you've made the mouth very expressive or captured the exact expression of your model. 

Avoid criticizing yourself

Sometimes, we're so worried about being criticized that we criticize ourselves before anyone else has the chance. Think back to the painting example. Even without someone else's input, you can build your self-worth by looking at the good, both in how you've painted and in who you are, no matter how well you paint. Remember that there can be a significant difference between identifying areas for improvement and criticizing yourself. The first can be considered a problem-solving task. The second often serves the purpose of leading you to perceive yourself poorly.

Find the good in yourself

When you experience a negative outcome, you can rebuild your self-worth by looking for the positives in the situation. You might feel like you're a bad parent because you missed your child's dance recital. Rather than defining yourself as a parent by that one instance, try to look for more profound ways that suggest you're a good parent.

Use "I am" with care

When you use "I am" phrases, you’re often putting limits on yourself, particularly if you’re defining yourself in a negative way. Instead of labeling yourself, try labeling the behavior or thought that's concerning you. Rather than saying, "I am bad at solving problems,” you might say, "That idea wasn't quite right.” 

Benefits of online therapy 

Online therapy can be a convenient way of pursuing mental health care. With an online therapy platform like  BetterHelp , you can chat with a therapist remotely, which may be helpful if you’re not yet comfortable discussing topics related to your self-image in person. BetterHelp works with thousands of therapists who have a wide range of specialties, so you’ll likely have a good chance of matching with someone who can address your concerns, whether they’re related to your self-worth, a mental health condition, or another challenge. 

Studies suggest that online therapy can help people develop a stronger sense of self-worth. For example, in one study, researchers found that online cognitive behavioral therapy generally increased participants’ self-esteem, self-compassion, and overall quality of life. Cognitive behavioral therapy can help individuals identify and replace negative thought patterns that may be leading to maladaptive emotions and behaviors, such as those related to devaluing oneself.  

Below are some reviews of BetterHelp therapists from people experiencing similar concerns.

Therapist reviews

"Dr. Mohammed is a very good therapist to work with. She gets me to think and to challenge my core negative beliefs with more positive beliefs in ways that are easy to do. She is a caring therapist who makes me feel validated and is helping me to see my worth as a human being. I highly recommend Dr. Mohammed to anyone seeking therapy, especially for past traumas."

“Stacy is incredibly insightful. She listens intently, challenges me to digest the issues in my life and I have become a more aware and confident person since beginning sessions with her. Highly recommend!!”

What is an example of self-worth?

Imagine a college student who receives a low grade on a test. Instead of letting this key life moment define her or succumbing to a critical inner voice, she recognizes her positive qualities and understands that one grade does not determine her overall worth.

How do I develop self-worth?

Building self-worth involves practicing self-acceptance, recognizing and appreciating your positive qualities, challenging your critical inner voice, and avoiding defining your worth by external factors. Seeking self-understanding and cultivating personal power can also boost self-worth.

What are the 4 types of self-worth?

Self-worth can be categorized into four types:

• Self-confidence: belief in one’s abilities.
• Self-acceptance: embracing oneself, flaws and all.
• Self-understanding: deep knowledge about self-strengths, weaknesses, and motivations.
• Self-compassion: treating oneself with kindness and understanding, especially during tough times.

What is a strong self-worth?

A strong self-worth means possessing an internal sense of being a worthy and capable person, irrespective of external factors or what others might think. It’s accompanied by healthy self-worth and genuine self-confidence.

What is an example of a lack of self-worth?

A person who constantly seeks validation from others and lets external factors, like their job or relationship status, entirely dictate their own life, showcases a lack of self-worth.

What are the two types of self-worth?

The two primary types are internal self-worth, which is grounded in an internal sense of worthiness not reliant on external factors, and external self-worth, which is based on external validation, achievements, or societal standards.

What does poor self-worth mean?

Poor self-worth, often synonymous with low self-esteem, indicates a lack of belief in oneself as a worthy and capable person. It is heavily influenced by external factors and a harsh internal critic.

What happens when you have self-worth?

When you possess self-worth, you operate from a place of self-acceptance and self-confidence. This leads to healthier relationships, more resilience during key life moments, and a stronger sense of personal power and purpose.

What is the attitude of self-worth?

The attitude of self-worth is characterized by self-respect, valuing oneself, acknowledging one’s positive qualities, and not letting external factors solely define one’s value.

What is another meaning for self-worth?

Another way to describe self-worth is as the internal sense of your value or worth as a person, beyond just skills or accomplishments.

• How To Stop Feeling Inadequate Medically reviewed by Melissa Guarnaccia , LCSW
• The media and body image: How to safeguard your self-esteem Medically reviewed by Paige Henry , LMSW, J.D.
• Self Esteem
• Relationships and Relations

How to stop finding your self-worth through your job (w/ Gloria Chan Packer) (Transcript)

Listen along.

How to Be a Better Human How to stop finding your self-worth through your job (w/ Gloria Chan Packer) May 8, 2023

[00:00:00] Chris Duffy: You are listening to How to Be a Better Human. I'm your host, Chris Duffy.

[00:00:10] Gloria Chan Packer: I started struggling with debilitating chronic migraines that for me, meant that after months of no change and no medication or treatment working, I knew I had to take at least a leave from work. And that was devastating for me because work had really become my everything.

[00:00:28] Chris Duffy: Gloria Chan Packer is a management consultant, but not just any consultant. She was and is one of the best in the world. She was working with people at corporations all across the globe. But when illness forced her to suddenly take a step back from her job, it felt like she was losing herself.

[00:00:44] Gloria Chan Packer: There is a memory that haunts me from that time. Um, it was the night before I was about to go on leave and I was just grabbing dinner with a friend and my husband, and I said to my friend, “Work is my entire worth and my identity. I don't know what I'm gonna do without it.” And my husband's body language and face dropped in a way that I had never seen it.

And after my friend left, I remember him saying to me, “I can't believe that you think that work is your only worth when I see so much more. And I can't believe you can't see that either.”

It's a poignant memory for me because I remember it feeling so true.

[00:01:25] Chris Duffy: Today's episode is gonna deal with issues that many of us struggle with every day. How do you draw boundaries at work? How do you balance, ambition, and drive with taking care of yourself? What is really important in life? I know intellectually, I know that how things are going at work is not a reflection on whether I am a good person or not, and yet it is so hard when I hit a roadblock or I have a rejection to not feel like that reflects on me as a person.

These are things that I really struggle with, so I'm so excited to talk about all of them and much more with Gloria Chan Packer today. We're gonna get into all of that right after this quick break. Don't go anywhere.

[00:02:13] Chris Duffy: And we are back. Today, we're talking with Gloria Chan Packer about how work is not your family.

[00:02:17] Gloria Chan Packer: I'm Gloria Chan Packer. I'm a mental wellness educator, a TED speaker, and an experienced corporate leader. I'm also the founder and owner of Recalibrate, a workplace mental wellness provider that serves corporations worldwide.

[00:02:32] Chris Duffy: What was your own work experience and your path that led you to caring so much about workplace mental health?

[00:02:39] Gloria Chan Packer: So I studied business in college and I was probably borderline obsessed with figuring out how to have a successful career. I ended up landing a gig in consulting, which felt very shiny, especially from the business school side of things.

I really enjoyed my career in consulting. It was challenging. I got to travel a bunch, and I got to learn a lot of different skills in a lot of different types of companies. One thing that was difficult that ended up kind of catching me and making me look at a, a blindspot maybe I had, was how much stress and my propensity for overworking could really cause me to burn out a lot more quickly and a lot more often than I realized.

In consulting, because you're in client services, uh, you're, you're somewhat expected to please the client as much as you can. And when you're a people pleaser or a perfectionist and aren't used to setting any boundaries, that can be a, a pretty rough formula. Um, I, I had a really unexpected medical battle that popped up in the form of chronic migraines in 2017.

Then I, I took a leave from work and finally started therapy that I had been thinking about starting forever and really learned so much about not only myself, but a lot of the science behind everyday shared mental health experiences like stress and people pleasing and perfectionism and burnout, and just felt so strongly through that experience that so many more of my own peers and colleagues could find so much benefit in knowing the science behind some of these concepts that maybe otherwise would feel too soft or too in the woo for them to wanna look at otherwise.

[00:04:30] Chris Duffy: Can we talk about that moment where you're having these chronic migraines, nothing is working, and all of a sudden you realize, “Okay, I have to change something big about my relationship to work”? Do you remember the fears or the barriers that you felt in that moment to, to changing your relationship to work?

[00:04:49] Gloria Chan Packer: Yes, very much so. It was terrifying. You know, even though I wouldn't say that work felt like my everything, it was a really, really, really big piece. It was kind of the center, if you will, of my day-to-day and of my safety, and I think work and doing well in work was so tied to my own sense of emotional stability and safety that not being able to have that just had me feeling completely lost and completely powerless.

We get taught in many aspects of our society… Actually, we, like, don’t get taught at all how to define our self-worth. I think that's just like something that is very nebulous, and where we subliminally get taught to define our self-worth is through our work and through our job. And that’s, like, the only language we have for it.

And it's the only place we focus. And, and so for many of us who don't have tools or education around mental health or emotional health, we, we don't have any other sense of self-worth besides what we do for a living. And so, yeah, I, I think so many people relate to that, myself included, Chris, where it's like, I don't, I don't even know how to tell you about myself without talking about my work.

[00:06:03] Chris Duffy: So what advice do you have for people who feel that their identity or their passion is so tied to their work that they're, they feel really reluctant to step back from it? It feels dangerous.

[00:06:12] Gloria Chan Packer: The longer and the harder path of advice is to really kind of do the self-reflection and do the self-work to understand what it is that makes work or overworking or being the best feel so safe.

Or in other words, what would make it feel so unsafe to not be the perfectionist or not be the XYZ job title? What does that mean? And maybe even just ask yourself, like, “If I didn't have that, what would that mean?”

And normally your most kind of extreme gut reaction is the one that's the most informational, right? Something like, “I'd be worthless,” or “People wouldn't like me.” But really we wanna pay attention to that because that's what we technically call kind of a cognitive schema that we've developed. Technically a cognitive schema is, is basically just a learned behavior or thought. It's almost like a mental map for if we're in this kind of situation, then this is how we should think, act, and feel.

And so many of our schemas are developed early on in life when our brains are really blank slates and we're trying to figure out how the world works and how we either navigate to safety and resourcing or navigate away from danger and de-resourcing. And so, I think a lot of times for our overachievers that tend to burn out a lot and tend to tie ourselves too much to work, there are big aspects of our upbringing where we learned that being the best was safe, and not being the best was really unsafe.

[00:07:52] Chris Duffy: Okay, so your TEDx talk was “Work is not your family”, and this was one of the most viewed talks of the past year. People, it really resonated with people. Other than the fact that you're a great communicator, I wonder if you have some thoughts about like why this struck a chord with so many people.

[00:08:09] Gloria Chan Packer: Calling work our family, I think was something that became so commonplace, but I, for many of us maybe had some detrimental effects that we, we couldn't quite put a pin on, but we were experiencing that I think the TED talk resonated with so many people because it, it gave us a more tangible understanding of why sometimes that can be problematic.

And also I think just a little bit of understanding on, on how that relates to each of us individually as well and our own wirings. ‘Cause I think a lot of times when we're talking about anything related to health and wellness, it can feel so big and generalized that it doesn't feel as helpful or applicable or actionable until we can figure out a way to tie it to ourselves and our own story, too.

[00:08:58] Chris Duffy: I completely agree. I also think that one of the key parts of a family is that you're stuck with them, right? Like, no matter what happens, you kind of can't change who your family is. And that is actually, definitionally not the case with the job, right? Like you, your job will fire you if you don't do your work.

And if your job is terrible, you have the option to leave. And so viewing it as a family kind of puts us in this, this trap where we are supposed to give everything, and yet we don't get that unconditional love back. And I think we're just supposed to work and give everything without thinking about whether we're gonna get something back in return, other than actual money.

[00:09:33] Gloria Chan Packer: Yeah. The interesting part too, right, is that I think especially for people… For people who came from biological or, or blood family structures that were healthier and had healthier dynamics, I think that means in work, the whole work-is-family concept isn't going to probably hit us as, as unhealthily, but for those of us who maybe had family structures where there were big bleeds and boundaries or, or things were just not as healthy, and dynamics were chaotic or constantly in conflict, that's more likely to mean that we had to adapt and survive through things like people pleasing, putting other people first, ignoring our own needs.

And so when we get into a workplace, that, one, is probably feeling like safety because it gives us a sense of autonomy and power that maybe we are our, our brains weren't used to before. But two, it ends up kind of having more of a propensity to, to have us working unhealthily because we didn't have a, a healthy structure from the get-go.

[00:10:41] Chris Duffy: So we often have these conversations about work-life balance. And in those conversations, a, a very common topic is setting boundaries. In, in your view, what is the problem that boundaries solve and, and why have they been so topical lately? I think it's really at the heart of a lot of what we're talking about.

[00:10:58] Gloria Chan Packer: Burnout and boundaries have become so topical in recent years, largely due to the pandemic. The pandemic, I think, was almost an amplifier or a magnifying glass for where all of us were in our own mental healths. Where if we had a pretty strong foundation, the pandemic would really amplify on the fact that, okay, we have some skills to navigate this. But if we didn't really have a, a solid toolbox, the pandemic really, really tested that.

And I think for most of us, just because societally mental health just started being less stigmatized, a lot of us found ourselves in a place where we're realizing that we don't have the healthiest boundaries or relationship to work, and now that we are working physically in our homes and our work is physically closer to us, when it was already probably mentally too close to us, we all really struggled with that ‘cause we didn't know how to draw some boundaries and, and not be at work all the time.

[00:11:59] Chris Duffy: Boundaries—it, it is a term that comes up a lot and I think as a result, there's become some blurriness around exactly what boundaries mean, right? So for some people, the way they use it, it feels a little buzzwordy. So, what are boundaries and how do we put them into practice in a way that actually works?

[00:12:16] Gloria Chan Packer: I think of boundaries as really the ability to identify and communicate our needs. It sounds very, very simple, but it's so much more complex for many of us because when it comes to identifying and communicating our needs, a lot of us have learned that maybe it's beneficial to deprioritize or delay our needs.

And in some instances that can be true, but for many of us it's become such a autopilot, kind of one size fits all rule that we've delayed and deprioritized our needs so much that our nervous system kind of just subconsciously thinks, “Oh, we can’t. We always can't be resourced. We always can't speak up for our needs.”

And I think boundaries, again, are, are pretty simple in definition in that it's all about us identifying and communicating our needs, but they end up just feeling a lot more complicated to put into practice because of each of our very complicated personal past and behavioral patterns that are tied up in, in not wanting to speak to our needs or thinking that that'll result in negative consequence.

[00:13:23] Chris Duffy: One example that comes to mind for me is, you know, if I got an email from my brother saying, “We need to talk,” it feels, and I'm not proud of saying this, but it feels like the kind of thing that I might say, like, “Great, once I get out of this meeting, I'll call you.” But if I was talking to my brother, and I got an email from a boss saying we need to talk, I'd probably be like, “Hold on, I need to talk to the boss right now.” So, it feels like that's completely upside down, and yet it's a hard pattern to break.

[00:13:45] Gloria Chan Packer: I think a big core piece of this is really around your values and your priorities, and that should drive where your boundaries are. It’s, I think that a lot of us, we just want boundaries to be like one size fits all.

[00:14:01] Chris Duffy: Definitely.

[00:14:01] Gloria Chan Packer: And for some to be like, “These are your boundaries. This is the language you use, and now life will be well and better.” And that's just really, could not be, unfortunately, more opposite from the truth, because all of us are different. We're all in different seasons of life. We all have different priorities, and so therefore, all of our boundaries need to be designed and communicated in different ways.

Like, if I am in a season of life where my top priority truly is work and achieving something because it's the most meaningful to me and I am truly okay with, like, making some sacrifices in the meantime and I feel like I can be healthy for, for this season in life then sure, answer your text during the weekend.

And that is something that is funny. It's poignant to me right now ‘cause I am, I just had my first baby and so I'm still in this like kind of odd identity transition and postpartum haze where I, I thought, right, especially working in mental wellness, God I was like, “Yeah, I, like, have these part-time hours figured out to where I can spend time with him and prioritize him, but I can also spend time in my work and I can also be a wife and I can also be a friend and involved in all of this stuff.

And that could not have been farther from the truth. Like, I just feel overwhelmed all the time and I have to, like, really have a hard look at myself and look at my own learnings and, and, and knowledge and, and burnout and just over scoping and wanting to do it all and realizing that a lot of times you just can’t.

[00:15:31] Chris Duffy: That I think, is such an important point—the idea that in different seasons, different things can be the priority, but what are the other misconceptions or, or misuses of boundaries?

[00:15:41] Gloria Chan Packer: So one other one that I see a lot is that, like, boundaries are almost like a way to demand or, or control other people. To be like, “You have to do this,” or almost to use it as like a threat, which also kind of quickly bleed, bleeds into using boundaries to kind of excuse bad behavior, too.

That's just kind of a, a cringey uncomfortable truth about mental health becoming more commonplace too, is that with anything good comes a lot of good, but sometimes you'll have misconceptions and, and unfortunately, sometimes you'll, you'll have people kind of using these concepts to almost weaponize them, you know? And I don't think anyone ever does that intentionally. Right? But a lot of times they're just—

[00:16:30] Chris Duffy: Well, come people do. But hopefully not many people.

[00:16:31] Gloria Chan Packer: Yeah. Some people. Hopefully not many people. And, and burnout's an interesting thing ‘cause I think a lot of times burnout is like, it's a result of us feeling generally powerless.

And so when we have boundaries come into the equation in an emotionally charged situation already where we're maybe triggered from something complex in our past, then sometimes we might be prone to being like, “Oh, this is, this is like my defense weapon.” So it's like, no, I have power. Like, you have to do this.

That's just really not the, the healthier, productive way to apply boundaries. Right? We can't control other people, and we also can't always completely, like, offload blame or, or we can't have just like a free pass to, to behave poorly or unhealthfully. Boundaries are really hard to design and they're really hard to, to execute sometimes too.

And so when you, like, go through all of that work to figure out, like, what the source of your problem is and what you need to change, and a lot of times it, it'll feel like a tough change ‘cause it's so unfamiliar or scary and then you do it and then you don't get what you want. That sucks. But that'll just be the case sometimes, right?

Boundaries are about you communicating what you need and what will happen if you don't get that need met and how you'll respond in turn. I always like to try to highlight that communicating boundaries really shouldn't be, like, a me versus you defensive fight or should, should hopefully really be, like, more of a collective discussion around what needs should be met and, and how we can problem solve for that collectively to sustain our, our work, our relationships, and, and so many other things that we need each other for in life.

[00:18:13] Chris Duffy: Okay. I'm gonna communicate a much less important boundary right now, which is the boundary between our conversation and an ad break. We will be right back after these messages.

[00:18:30] Chris Duffy: Today’s guest is Gloria Chan Packer, who gave one of the most viewed TED Talks of last year about how work is not your family. So here's another clip from Gloria's talk that explains why the idea that work is our family is so unhealthy and how it can lead to burnout.

[00:18:44] Gloria Chan Packer: When it comes to burnout, our workplaces and employers do own a big part of the equation. However, what I find to be somewhat of an overlooked part of the equation today is what piece of the problem we individually own ourselves too. If I inherently have a tendency or a pattern to overwork or not be able to set boundaries, no matter what workplace or organization I change, if I never take accountability to drive my own internal change, then no matter what external change I make, I will likely keep suffering from the same patterns over and over again.

[00:19:21] Chris Duffy: Well, I’m curious to talk about boundaries from kind of two different angles, right? The from the top down, and then when you're not the leader. So right now, you are the leader of an organization. You have people under you.

[00:19:32] Chris Duffy: Yeah.

[00:19:32] Gloria Chan Packer: And I think that sometimes I, when you are the one in charge, it can be really hard to set boundaries because a lot of stuff falls on your shoulders, and so you want to take care of it and the buck stops with you.

And so it can be hard to set boundaries for yourself because at the end of the day, you want things to get done, and you feel a lot of responsibility to the people who are working for you. But just in your personal situation right now, I imagine there's also a challenge where you're like, “I could do a bunch. But I also have a six-month-old at home, and I want to be spending time with him.”

And there's this other layer of “I wanna be modeling the boundaries that I want other people in our organization to have around their own families and their own children.” So, how do you manage those tensions in your own life when you are the, the person that everyone looks to at the top?

[00:20:21] Gloria Chan Packer: For me, I think it's a lot about anticipating. And so for me, I knew that I was coming up in this very big seasonal shift, and so for over a year ahead of time, just because I, I knew that we were trying to conceive, I did my best to try to set up our team in a way that I was much less of a bottleneck and that the team had a lot more autonomy to, to drive the business without me, especially when it came to, to time for me to go on maternity leave.

And also knowing that I, I wouldn't be as, available to work the long hours like I was before, once, once I had the baby. And so, parts of that worked really well, where, where the team did great while I was on leave and everything, I mean, ran smooth, even more smoothly than I, than I could have hoped for. Um, it's such a good question to have me even reflecting on in the moment because there are certainly aspects where things don't feel as clean and it's, it's a place where I, I feel somewhat of a privilege, right? And being able to, to be at the top and, and make those calls of, “Hey, I, I just can't take on X, Y, Z and set that boundary for myself.” But I, I don't know.

[00:21:40] Chris Duffy: Honestly, I think it is so helpful and useful to hear that it's not a clean, easy answer for you. I think that that's really important.

[00:21:48] Gloria Chan Packer: I guess maybe one tangible bit out of that, besides just being like “it's kind of messy”, um, is, is that a lot of times I just look at my workload for the next two weeks and I'm like, “Okay, how are we feeling right now?” And how doable does this all feel? And it's almost like either every week or every two weeks, I'm somewhat, for lack of a better word, recalibrating what the workload looks like, where I maybe need to offload some work onto the team or ask for some help or think about, okay, we have, there's too much, so we need to throttle the, the pipeline for client work and, and set different expectations for timelines.

And sometimes I think that's kind of like all you can do when it comes to setting boundaries when things are just changing too quickly and, and you kind of have to be reactive is just like make, make yourself an accountable time each week to ask yourself how things feel and how they're going and what needs to change and, and make those changes.

[00:22:46] Chris Duffy: It's perfect ‘cause obviously you started an organization called Recalibrate, but I think that that's a really important piece here, right? Is the idea that sometimes it feel so overwhelming to set a boundary and be like, “This boundary is now carved into a stone tablet for the rest of time.”

[00:22:58] Gloria Chan Packer: Yeah.

[00:22:59] Chris Duffy: As opposed to, “Okay, that's my boundary for this week. Maybe for next two weeks, and then I'm gonna go and see how it works. I'm gonna test it against reality and I'm gonna be able to change it.”

[00:23:08] Gloria Chan Packer: The other tricky thing too, is for many of us who tend towards overachieving and, and just achieving in general, like even solving for our burnout and setting boundaries feels like something we need to either achieve versus fail at.

And so when we, like, set that boundary and we're like, “Wait, this isn't working,” then we feel like we've failed. And a lot of times we're like, “This whole wellness thing is, like, not working out for me,” and we give up and… So, yeah, I, I try to also remind myself and everyone else, right, that this entire journey around behavioral change and just feeling more sustainable and more healthy is not linear.

I think the goal should be almost like acting like the stock market, where it's like up and down and up and down, but like generally trends upwards towards something healthier and towards more behavioral growth and change. But knowing that sometimes you're gonna feel up and sometimes it's gonna be like, a giant regression backwards, and that's just the nature of it.

[00:24:02] Chris Duffy: What are some ways to effectively manage burnout and, and set some boundaries? What are, what are maybe three things that you think that listeners should try to, to work that are strategies that you’ve seen?

[00:24:11] Gloria Chan Packer: I think one place where many of us struggle is around our work hours, and for a lot of us, we try the one size fits all approach of like, “Okay, my work hours are nine to five and I'm not gonna be on Slack, or I'm not gonna be online outside of nine to five.”

And then we try that once and we're like, “Oh my God, that was horrible and completely unrealistic, so boundaries don't work.” Try to design something a little bit more specific. So for me and for my team, especially during the pandemic, it became so much easier to work with our global clients where we weren't traveling there in person and we could just hop online.

I ultimately designed boundaries for our team where we accepted global client requests outside of our hours Mondays to Wednesdays. But Thursdays and Fridays were strictly protected. Thursdays are strictly protected to our hours. And then Fridays we actually work half days, um, so that we can accommodate that client work that we wanna grow Mondays to Wednesdays, but on Thursdays and Fridays, when we're more tired, when we have more personal and familial engagements, those are strongly protected and we have those boundaries, and it allows for a little bit of everything that we need and everything that we're prioritizing.

Another tip I would offer when it comes to just boundaries and burnout, and I think a lot of us struggle with burnout because we just over-scope and say yes to everything. Uh, I'm guilty of this too.

[00:15:29] Chris Duffy: Absolutely, yes.

[00:15:30] Gloria Chan Packer: So if you have a propensity to be like a yes person, to always say yes without thinking, try to start buying some time for yourself to truly evaluate your bandwidth and your priorities before you say yes.

So when someone asks you something, like, you don't have to say yes or no right away. Say like, “Okay, I hear you. Um, Can I have until the end of the day to get back to you?” Or just say, “I need a little bit of time to evaluate what's on my plate and where my priorities are. When do you need to hear back from me? Bye.” And then I think my last thing when it comes to, like, communicating boundaries, uh, we really wanna focus our language, like I said before, around really specifying our need and what the impact will be if we don't get that need met. So like if, if you need this deadline to be two weeks earlier, like right now, everything's just full. And I don't see how that's gonna happen without something suffering. So maybe I know there's this team member who has a little bit of extra bandwidth. Could I maybe borrow them halftime? And if that's not possible, can you help me figure this out? And sometimes too, right, a boundary can really look like asking someone for help after you've stated what you need. And I think remembering that and remembering that you can make communicating boundaries feel authentic to you is important.

[00:26:47] Chris Duffy: So we talked about setting boundaries from the top when you're the boss, but this seems like a really applicable one for when you are, you know, in the middle or in the bottom of an organization.

And it's really hard, I think, to set a boundary when you feel like it might put your job at risk. It might make the person think less of you. You're, you know, maybe you feel like this is. You know, you can't afford to lose this job, you can't afford to find a different job, so you, you wanna make sure you're not doing anything to jeopardize it.

[00:27:31] Gloria Chan Packer: Yeah.

[00:27:31] Chris Duffy: Are there other ways that work when you're specifically, kind of, lowered down and you're worried about building a reputation and also keeping your, your job?

[00:27:22] Gloria Chan Packer: I think the way you summarized it, um, is what I would prioritize the most is really to focus on like what the, the need and the impact is to the work and the organization. Right?

Because like, this won't always be the case, but truly functional workplaces and leaders want to know when there are problems so that we can solve for them. I know again, unfortunately, that's not always going to be how, how workplaces function, but that is the goal, right?

Uh, is that like a good manager, a good leader wants to know when there's a problem and wants to figure out how to solve it. I'd be remiss if I didn't mention that there are just certain industries and workplaces where this is gonna be harder ‘cause I think a lot of times with boundaries at work, sometimes it, it's almost like making a choice on what exactly you want to change and, and what feels realistic and sustainable for you too.

‘Cause for some industries, the culture is actually not to have boundaries and that sucks ‘cause that's, that's hard and, and you probably will have more negative consequences than if you worked in a, in a industry where wellness is really supported and boundaries are supported. And so I feel like in those instances, you, you have a tough choice to either make a micro change or a macro change, right?

You can either be like, “Okay, I'm gonna change this culture in this industry and make it more amenable to boundaries and wellness.” And if you feel up to that and you feel resourced for that, good on you. Go do that. But if you're like, “There's no way I can do that, I have no energy to do that,” that probably means you need to make a micro change for yourself.

That might mean that maybe you need to switch industries or, or switch workplaces or switch your situation. Personally and I, I think that can be one of the most difficult choices in boundaries too.

[00:29:14] Chris Duffy: Well around that, is there actually an ultimate fix to burnout? Is it possible to get rid of it altogether?

[00:29:20] Gloria Chan Packer: My short answer is no. I personally do not feel that the goal should be to eradicate burnout. In my personal and professional opinion, eradicating stress and burnout is neither realistic, nor makes any sense because stress is really this biologically wired human reflex, right? And so the goal shouldn't be to, I think, get rid of burnout, but really to build a healthier and more sustainable relationship with your stress and your, your burnout too.

I've been reflecting on this personally a lot. Right? And there was so much of me caught up in the, what you were alluding to too, Chris, like in the like, “I feel like I have failed” and that feeling of, like, “I feel like I've, I've failed at what I should be good at” was actually what was really keeping me from being able to help fix where I was because it was almost like what I tried to prevent burning out from being a new mom and working in a business owner, and blah, blah, blah, blah. Um, my fear of failing at that is what actually I think guaranteed and like kept me stuck in burnout mode. ‘Cause I was like, “No, this should have worked. This is gonna work.”

And I was really like, “No, this is not working.” What do you need to change? And that's always probably gonna be a pretty tough moment and a pretty tough change. But you make the change and you heal and you move forward and you kind of just keep doing that as you need to throughout the different seasons of life because, if there's any, I think guarantee in life it's that shit doesn't go your way and might go sideways sometimes.

[00:30:53] Chris Duffy: I don't know if this is helpful. I mean, I'm sorry to hear you're going through the burnout right now and if really, it makes me think, for me, sometimes I have this, I really struggle to kind of see accurately from the outside and I think like, “I have to do all these things because I'm not doing enough and I'm not, I'm not doing enough impressive things.”

And I'll just say, as a person who didn't know you before this conversation, from the outside, you are doing so many wildly impressive things all at the same time that I think you could probably do 80% less, and I would still be like, “Wow, that's an incredibly impressive person.” So, I don't know if that's helpful, but I just wanna say, like, you’re helping a lot of other people, but it also is, it's important to help yourself too, I think. I think that's really an intense thing. Absolutely.

[00:31:36] Gloria Chan Packer: I appreciate you saying that and, and I would, Kind of like challenge you to apply that to yourself too.

[00:31:42] Chris Duffy: Oh, I can’t do that. Oh, no, no, no, no. It works for other people. It can't work for me.

[00:31:45] Gloria Chan Packer: I know!

[00:31:45] Chris Duffy: That’s the role with all advice, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's just for other people. I don't do the healthy thing myself. No, no, no, no, no. Yeah. I have to keep working because otherwise, I won't have worth. But you have worth regardless, regardless or not.

[00:31:56] Gloria Chan Packer: Right? Ugh, isn't, isn't that just like, we'll just summarize the entire podcast episode with that.

[00:32:01] Chris Duffy: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Well, Gloria Chan Packer, thank you so much for being here. It's really a pleasure to talk to you.

[00:32:07] Gloria Chan Packer: Thank you so much for having me.

[00:32:11] Chris Duffy: That is it for today's episode of How to Be a Better Human. Thank you so much to today's guest, Gloria Chan Packer. I am your host, Chris Duffy, and you can find more from me, including my weekly newsletter and information about my live comedy shows at chrisduffycomedy.com.

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How to Improve Your Self-Worth and Why It's Important

Sanjana is a health writer and editor. Her work spans various health-related topics, including mental health, fitness, nutrition, and wellness.

Yolanda Renteria, LPC, is a licensed therapist, somatic practitioner, national certified counselor, adjunct faculty professor, speaker specializing in the treatment of trauma and intergenerational trauma.

Delmaine Donson / Getty Images

Factors That Influence Self-Worth

Gauging your self-worth, importance of self-worth.

• How to Improve Self-Worth

If you’ve heard the term “self-worth,” you’re probably wondering what exactly it means and why it’s important.

According to the American Psychological Association (APA), your self-worth is your evaluation of yourself as a capable and valuable human being deserving of consideration and respect. It is an internal sense of being worthy of love .

We often think about terms like “respect,” “love,” and “consideration” with regard to our relationships with others, such as our friends, family members, colleagues, and neighbors. However, the term “self-worth” is a gauge of how much we respect, love, and value ourselves. 

People with positive self-worth tend to have greater self-confidence and self-esteem. Having low self-worth, on the other hand, means judging oneself harshly, having a low opinion of oneself, and tending to focus on one's mistakes and shortcomings, rather than one's abilities and strengths.

Sabrina Romanoff, PsyD

It’s important to have self-worth because it impacts everything you do from your relationships, to how you work, how you feel about yourself, and how others view you.

This article explores the importance of self-worth and suggests some strategies to help you improve your self-worth. 

Self-worth is a subjective concept that can fluctuate based on many variables, says Sabrina Romanoff , PsyD, a clinical psychologist and professor at Yeshiva University. 

According to Dr. Romanoff, these are some of the factors that may influence self-worth:

• Core beliefs and values
• Thoughts and feelings
• Emotions and mental well-being
• Experiences and interactions with others
• Relationships , both past and present
• Health and physical fitness 
• Career and profession 
• Activities and hobbies
• Community and social status 
• Financial position
• Physical appearance
• Childhood experiences

If you’re trying to gauge your self-worth , Dr. Romanoff says it may be helpful to ask yourself the following questions:

• How much do you like, respect, and value yourself?
• Which words would you use to describe yourself to a stranger?
• When you self-reflect and think about yourself, are your thoughts generally positive, negative, or somewhere in between?
• Do you believe you are worthy of others’ love, respect, and consideration?

Asking yourself these questions can help you introspect and get a sense of your own self-worth. 

As you explore these thoughts, it can also be helpful to think about where your thoughts and beliefs around your self-worth originated from.

Below, Dr. Romanoff explains the benefits of having a healthy sense of self-worth and the potential pitfalls of having low self-worth.

Benefits of Positive Self-Worth

Folks with high self-worth carry with them a sense of confidence that they will be all right and manage whatever comes their way. While they are aware of areas in which they can improve, they don’t let their shortcomings define their identity. They are not afraid to pursue opportunities and have reasonable faith in their ability to deliver.

Self-worth also plays an important role in relationship dynamics. For example, if someone is treated poorly, their self-worth will likely have a large impact on their interpretation of the event—someone with low self-worth may blame themselves, whereas a person with healthy self-worth may not consider themselves deserving of mistreatment .

Therefore, having positive self-worth can help people set boundaries around how they are treated by others. Learning to ask for respect is what pushes others to be respectful.

According to a 2017 study, positive self-worth is associated with a greater sense of well-being and life satisfaction.

Potential Pitfalls of Low Self-Worth

Low self-worth is characterized by a negative view of oneself and a lack of trust in one’s abilities. As a result, there is a perpetual fear of failure, difficulty accepting positive comments, and a disproportionate focus on weaknesses.

Because there is a strong tendency to view oneself as unworthy, there is also a tendency to elevate others, in an effort to compensate. Someone with low self-worth may therefore minimize their needs, allow their boundaries to be infringed, go out of their way to please others, and be unable to stand up for themselves.

Low self-worth is highly correlated with depression and anxiety . As a result, people may experience symptoms like low mood, irritability, anxiety, fatigue, changes in weight, sleep difficulties, and inability to concentrate.

Strategies to Improve Your Self-Worth

Below, Dr. Romanoff shares some strategies that can help you boost your sense of self-worth:

• Do things you enjoy and are good at: Getting good at something—and enjoying it—can provide positive reinforcement and feelings of proficiency and capability. Having regular reminders of your talents, strengths, and abilities can help make you more confident in other areas of your life as well.
• Exercise and challenge yourself: Research shows us that physical activity is linked to a greater sense of self-worth. Inducing moderate strain on your body and striving towards increasingly advanced goals each time gives you tangible proof that you are capable of more than you thought. Exercise also recalibrates your mindset and offers both physical and mental benefits .
• Challenge negative thoughts: Remember that thoughts are not facts. In fact, most of the time, they are distortions caused by internalized critics, stress, and situational demands. Next time you have a negative self-thought, think of an alternative realistic thought to replace it.
• Seek support: You could also see a therapist for self-worth, if you notice that it’s constricting the quality of your functioning in your relationships, work, or emotional well-being. Having low self-worth can be like living life through restricted blinders. Sometimes complacency with this restriction grows, and people believe they are not worthy of more. In these instances, the perspective of a neutral, trained professional can be very effective.
• Build self-worth in your children: The origins of low self-worth can often be traced back to the behaviors of adults in childhood, even if they were well-meaning. If you have children , it’s important to actively work toward building their self-esteem. Rather than rewarding them for external factors such as appearance or winning sports games or prizes, recognize and praise internal factors such as effort and determination. Focus on what your child can control because if their self-esteem is solely based on external factors, their self-esteem will be dependent on the next accomplishment.

A Word From Verywell

Having a healthy sense of self-worth is important and can contribute to better relationships , work, health, and overall mental and emotional well-being. If you think you might have low self-esteem, there are steps you can take to improve it and have a more positive view of yourself. Loving, respecting, and valuing yourself can be the first step toward gaining the love, respect, and consideration of others.

American Psychological Association. Self-worth . APA Dictionary of Psychology .

University of North Carolina Wilmington. Self-worth .

Du H, King RB, Chi P. Self-esteem and subjective well-being revisited: The roles of personal, relational, and collective self-esteem . PLoS One . 2017;12(8):e0183958. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0183958

Sowislo JF, Orth U. Does low self-esteem predict depression and anxiety? A meta-analysis of longitudinal studies . Psychol Bull . 2013;139(1):213-240. doi:10.1037/a0028931

Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Mental health conditions: Depression and anxiety .

Reddon H, Meyre D, Cairney J. Physical activity and global self-worth in a longitudinal study . Med Sci Sports Exerc . 2017;49(8):1606-1613. doi:10.1249/MSS.0000000000001275

By Sanjana Gupta Sanjana is a health writer and editor. Her work spans various health-related topics, including mental health, fitness, nutrition, and wellness.

Speeches > Sharon G. Samuelson > A Place Within His Heart

A Place Within His Heart

Sharon g. samuelson.

Wife of Cecil O. Samuelson, President of Brigham Young University

January 10, 2006

It is a pleasure to welcome all of you back to Brigham Young University in 2006. It is a new year and a time for many resolutions to improve and change, but hopefully most of these are made throughout the year when needed and appropriate. For all of you 2006 is a year for realizing countless opportunities, setting goals, and anticipating accomplishments. It will present many choices and decisions for you. They are yours to grasp, make, and lead you forward—if you always remember to seek and do the Lord’s will amidst the challenges and excitement of life each and every day. It is both my husband’s and my wish that this year of your time here at the university will be a wonderful and successful one.

It was a little over a year ago when the devastating tsunami occurred in parts of Asia. We were all shocked and saddened by this news. Our hearts were deeply touched as we witnessed the devastation and loss of life as well the examples of compassion and goodness of people throughout the world seeking to help those who were suffering. A few days following the tragedy, I was watching a television program that was describing and discussing the tsunami and its aftermath. I can’t recall the names or titles of the participants on the program; however, I vividly recall—and have never forgotten—a response to a question by the commentator given by a woman associated with and knowledgeable about the efforts being done to help the victims as well as to account for those who had lost their lives.

The interviewer put forth this question: “Can you give an estimate of how many lives have probably been lost as a result of this natural disaster?”

Her response was, “In many parts of the area where much damage was done, people are not counted in life; therefore, it is impossible to count them in death.”

My first thought after a short and shocked hesitation—caused by the bluntness of her answer—was: “You are wrong. You neither are knowledgeable about nor understand the Lord’s magnificent plan of salvation. If only you really knew that our Heavenly Father counts each one of these men, women, and children as His son or daughter.”

We are instructed in the Doctrine and Covenants and reassured many, many times throughout the scriptures to “remember the worth of souls is great in the sight of God” (D&C 18:10). These souls include those who may never have had the opportunity in mortality to hear the message of our Savior, Jesus Christ, and the principles of the gospel it teaches. As I listened to that program, I was so thankful for my testimony of these principles and the knowledge that all who have lived, are living, and will yet live in this earthly realm are sons and daughters of a loving Father in Heaven.

There have been times in my life when I have been in the midst of hundreds or thousands of people: for example, at a football game in LaVell Edwards Stadium, with 65,000 people screaming and cheering; a crowded metropolis at Christmastime with people scurrying in and out of stores shopping for gifts; or a busy airport with people hurrying to catch planes headed in a multitude of directions. You have had these experiences too. Maybe you too have felt as I have at times and also pondered the thought “I am but one person among all these hundreds and thousands of people.” Then the mind tries to comprehend the millions and billions who have gone before, who are here now, and who will people the earth in the future. Have you at times asked yourselves, as I have, “Am I really that important? Just how much is my worth as I lead my life?”

This soul-searching question is answered in John 3:16, where we are taught that “God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son” so we could have eternal life. We know that we are spirit children of an exalted, glorified being who is our Father in Heaven. The Lord counts us all in life as well as in death—as He does the victims of the tsunami—and because we know who we are, we know why we are here: to strive to return one day to dwell in His presence. And this is what He desires for us too.

The Lord loves each one of us. We are His own. Moses was told by the Lord that He created our world and its inhabitants and that all are His (see Moses 1:35). How blessed we are to have such knowledge. Listen to the words of a beautiful woman who gained this awareness as she struggled with her own self-worth and understanding of who she was:

As a convert, the hymn “God Loved Us, So He Sent His Son” was sung at the very first sacrament meeting I attended as a brand-new member of the Church. For the first 18 years of my life I struggled with my worth and with who I was and what my importance was to anyone. I had been told I was the ugliest girl in my school, and I carried that label with me for many years. As I took the missionary discussions, I learned enough of the gospel plan to know it was true and right. At my first sacrament meeting when the third verse of that hymn was sung, I knew in that moment for the first time who I really was and what my importance was. That moment changed everything for me. Nothing on the outside changed, but everything on the inside did. I was part of His plan, His offering. And I hold a place within His Heart. [Personal communication]

The world in which we live today tells us that our sense of worth is based upon what is seen or accomplished. We are measured by possessions and wealth, physical appearance and dress styles, social status and achievements. Too many of us strive to gain acceptance using these standards, trying to enhance the perception of our worth by those who are part of our lives as well as those who view us from afar. If we are not careful, we can let others determine and establish our standards and feelings of self-worth. We can become someone else’s image of success rather than our own.

President Harold B. Lee often quoted Harry Emerson Fosdick’s description of a prayer of an old Edinburgh weaver: “O God, help me to hold a high opinion of myself” (Harry Emerson Fosdick, Twelve Tests of Character [New York: Association Press, 1941], 35; see Harold B. Lee, “Understanding Who We Are Brings Self-Respect,” Ensign, January 1974, 4). In other words, the weaver prayed that he would value himself for what he was rather than for the opinions held by others. William Shakespeare also said:

This above all: to thine own self be true,

And it must follow, as the night the day,

Thou canst not then be false to any man.

[ Hamlet, act 1, scene 3, lines 78–80]

As university students you are dealing with the worldly requirements for success every day. Therefore, if you do not constantly remind yourselves of what is of true value and worth, you can lose perspective and insight as you forge ahead into the future. Sister Patricia Holland, speaking in a Brigham Young University devotional, stated:

We are becoming so concerned about having perfect figures, or straight A’s, or professional status . . . that we are being torn from our true selves. We often worry so much about pleasing and performing for others that we lose our own uniqueness, that full and relaxed acceptance of ourselves as a person of worth and individuality. [Patricia T. Holland, “The Soul’s Center” (13 January 1987), BYU 1986–87 Devotional and Fireside Speeches (Provo: BYU, 1987), 84]

My dear friends, I worry that we often forget that each one of us is inherently of great worth because we are children of God. It is easy to forget if we listen to the voices of the world’s values that surround us. Elder Neal A. Maxwell put it best: “Some among us mistakenly see the size and response of their audiences as the sole verification of their worth” (Neal A. Maxwell, “Irony: The Crust on the Bread of Adversity,” Ensign, May 1989, 63).

Often these audiences would lead us to have a false sense of worth. This is evident today in the media messages as well as in the examples of many around us who live in and seek notoriety. The values of virtue, chastity, modesty, integrity, faith, love, and respect, among many others, are not perceived as worthwhile by so many today. The world would judge us to be of more worth by what we have than by what is in our hearts. It would have us reject these God-given values in favor of others that could lead us away from righteousness and positive feelings of self-worth.

The Lord has warned us in the scriptures that we are seeking the things of the world rather than seeking Him when we place the greatest value on riches and the praises of men. We are told that many are not chosen by the Lord “because their hearts are set so much upon the things of this world, and [they] aspire to the honors of men” (D&C 121:35).

It is invaluable to each one of us that we always know and never forget that the measure of our worth is in our divine heritage. The gospel teaches us that our true worth is based upon its teachings and principles. We do not need the world to tell us whether we are successful and worthwhile or not.

The Lord does desire for us to be successful in our righteous endeavors—whether temporal or spiritual. There are many things of the world that are pleasing in His sight—such as gaining knowledge and wisdom as you study here—but one must never forget that the source of all these things is the Lord, and thus we should show Him gratitude. Showing gratitude to the Lord helps us better see our worth in His sight.

We strengthen our sense of worth by being dignified in the lives we lead and by following the teachings of our Lord, Jesus Christ. As we rely upon our Savior for guidance and His deep love for us in all we do, our feelings of personal worth will be expressed in the lives we lead, and we then bless others by our example and service.

Our eternal worth is given to us by God. We do not have to let it be determined by others—only by God and ourselves. We can lose sight of our self-worth if we do not keep the commandments and consequently disregard the divinity within us. The focus of the work of our Savior, Jesus Christ, is each one of us, as expressed in the book of Moses: “For behold, this is my work and my glory—to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man” (Moses 1:39).

In conclusion, let me recite to you from the third verse of “God Loved Us, So He Sent His Son” that reminded my friend of her true self-worth—as it should remind all of us:

Oh, love effulgent, love divine!

What debt of gratitude is mine,

That in his off’ring I have part

And hold a place within his heart.

[ Hymns, 1985, no. 187]

It is my prayer that each of us may know of our worth to those who truly love us, especially our Heavenly Father, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

© Brigham Young University. All rights reserved.

Sharon G. Samuelson, wife of BYU president Cecil O. Samuelson, delivered this devotional address on 10 January 2006.

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Home » Blog » General » Self-Esteem and Self-Worth: How to Teach Both

Self-Esteem and Self-Worth: How to Teach Both

According to Merriam-Webster, the terms ‘self-esteem’ and ‘self-worth’ are synonymous, but we are here to tell you differently. Even though the two terms share a prefix, they are in fact different, describing completely separate traits within ourselves. Understanding the subtle difference between the two terms is crucial before we try to instill and teach positive self-esteem and self-worth to our students. Psychologist Dr. Christina Hibbert defines the distinction between each term best when she says:

“Self-esteem is what we think and feel and believe about ourselves. Self-worth is recognizing “I am greater than all of those things”. It is a deep knowing that I am of value, that I am loveable, necessary to this life, and of incomprehensible worth” (Dr. Christina Hibbert, 2014)

Why is it important to teach self-esteem and self-worth?

Positive self-esteem and self-worth encourages students to set healthy goals for themselves and to generally strive for overall happiness. Research shows that students with low self-esteem and self-worth often have mental health challenges, including issues with their relationships, depression and anxiety, and even addiction. 

How to teach both:

So we know that building positive self-esteem and self-worth is important, but how do we achieve that within our classrooms?

• Provide opportunities for students to experience success – Students who experience success are more likely to take healthy, necessary risks to achieve more success in the future. Set realistic expectations for students to experience success by incorporating differentiated instruction when you can. It’s also important to emphasize that we all make mistakes and that making mistakes is a part of learning.
• Provide unconditional positive regard and respect to your students – Showing students unconditional positive regard for who they are and what they are capable of. Use positive praise that emphasizes classroom contributions (i.e., “I’m so glad you shared your ideas with the class”) or character traits (i.e., “I can really tell you put a lot of thought and effort into this assignment”). This demonstrates that students do not  need to achieve anything to ‘earn’ others’ respect, but are accepted and appreciated for who they are as a person. .
• Model positive self-talk – Comparing ourselves to others or listening to inner critical voices can be destructive and detrimental to a person’s self-worth. Try one of these Positive Thinking activities with your students.
• Teach students that their worth is not attached to their social or academic achievements : Make the distinction that students will always be valued as unique and important members of your classroom community. A bad math grade or poor athletic skills does not diminish their self-worth.

In the era of social media it is easy for our adolescents to focus on the approval of others and to lose sight of themselves. As educators, we have the power to lay the foundation for our students to develop critical social-emotional skills needed to be healthy and successful members of the community. Above all, we can be that voice that reminds our students that even if they cannot see their own self-worth, that our message is clear— “ you are worthy and valuable ”.

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• Speech on Self Confidence

Speech on Self-Confidence

Self-confidence is believing in oneself. According to E.E. Cummings, “Once we believe in ourselves, we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight, or any experience that reveals the human spirit.” Do you want to know more about self-confidence? Go through the following article, collect ample information regarding the topic, and share your thoughts with the world.

Table of Contents

Self-confidence speech in english, short speech on self-confidence, top quotes to use in a speech on self-confidence, frequently asked questions on self-confidence, sample speeches on self-confidence.

A few samples of speeches on self-confidence are given below. Go through these speeches and utilise them to improve your knowledge on the topic.

Self-confidence means having belief in oneself. It is the attitude developed by an individual based on one’s skills and abilities. Self-confidence is  important for a positive lifestyle. It helps you to develop trust in yourself and bring a sense of control to your life. An individual’s self-confidence gets boosted when one realises one’s own strengths and weaknesses. It helps in understanding one’s true self, and thus, develops an optimistic personality within the individual.

Let’s remember the words said by Eleanor Roosevelt, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent”. Self-confidence is something that is developed internally. It helps an individual to set goals for winning in life. Low self-confidence results in self-doubt, which in turn, makes an individual feel inferior and sensitive to criticism. Unwanted doubts about oneself negatively affect one’s perception of life. It drags a person down and ultimately results in failures.

The aftereffects of different experiences shape the life of an individual. Unsupportive environment negatively affect the self-confidence of an individual. Obstacles are part of life; it is important to make sure that you never let those obstacles design your life. Work to counter such troubles and don’t dwell on failure. Learn from experiences; no master is better than them.

Self-confidence is undoubtedly the key to success. It makes a person feel independent, optimistic, and positive in life. With all these characteristics, a person can easily deal with difficult situations in life. Self-confidence helps an individual to successfully face day-to-day challenges and demands. People feel more motivated and energised when they are confident in their abilities. With this trait vested inside, people develop the strength to face all the challenges in their lives. The strength developed by the people pushes them to do more and achieve goals in life. As a result, it paves the way for happiness in an individual’s life.

There are multiple ways to improve self-confidence in a person. Try to recognise your strength and who you are. This is one of the major steps that can be taken to increase your self-confidence. Realise your abilities and learn to use them. Mark your progress and praise your efforts. List down all your abilities and things that you are confident to do. Perform a close analysis of the list and choose the things that you want to ameliorate.

Try to surround yourself with positive, successful people and experience the vibe generated by them. Express yourself. Always try to express your voice, feelings, and beliefs directly. You don’t need to feel guilty for expressing your thoughts and ideas.

Start believing in yourself. Self-confident people perceive themselves as the best. Perceptions greatly influence one’s life and shape their growth. “You become what you believe, not what you think or what you want.” These are the words told by Oprah Winfrey. So start believing in yourself, and live a life by acting on your beliefs.

• “With realisation of one’s own potential and self-confidence in one’s ability, one can build a better world.” – The Dalai Lama.
• “If you have no confidence in self, you are twice defeated in the race of life. With confidence, you have won even before you have started.” – Cicero.
• “Life is not easy for any of us. But what of that? We must have perseverance and, above all, confidence in ourselves. We must believe that we are gifted for something and that this thing must be attained.” – Marie Curie.
• “Trust yourself–you know more than you think you do.” – Benjamin Spock.
• “Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers, you cannot be successful or happy.” – Norman Vincent Peale.
• “Self-confidence can be learned, practised, and mastered–just like any other skill. Once you master it, everything in your life will change for the better.” – Barrie Davenport.
• “One important key to success is self-confidence. An important key to self-confidence is preparation.” – Arthur Ashe.
• “Don’t waste your energy trying to change opinions … Do your thing, and don’t care if they like it.” – Tina Fey.
• “The confidence which we have in ourselves gives birth to much of that which we have in others.” – François de la Rochefoucauld.
• “Always remember you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” ­-Christopher Robin.

Why is self-confidence so important?

Self-confidence means having a belief in oneself. It is the attitude developed by an individual based on skills and abilities. Self-confidence is very important for a positive lifestyle. It helps you to develop trust for yourself and bring a sense of control to your life.

How can we improve self-confidence?

Try to recognise your strength and who you are. Start believing in yourself. Self-confident people perceive themselves as the best. Mark your progress and praise your efforts. List down all your abilities and things that you are confident to do. Perform a close analysis of the list and choose the things that you want to ameliorate.

List some quotes to use in a speech on self-confidence.

• “Life is not easy for any of us. But what of that? We must have perseverance and, above all, confidence in ourselves. We must believe that we are gifted for something and that this thing must be attained.” ­- Marie Curie.

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