my dog ate my homework my dog wrote mine

StarTribune

Where did that doggone phrase come from.

When did "my dog ate my homework" become known as schoolchildren's favorite excuse?

Delinquent schoolchildren and adults have been blaming their shortcomings on their pets for more than a century, but it wasn't until the 1970s that "my dog ate my homework" came to be considered the No. 1 likely story.

One of the first sad sacks who was said to blame his dog for his own ill-preparedness was a priest. In this anecdote, which appeared as early as 1905, a clergyman pulls his clerk aside after a service to ask him whether his sermon seemed long enough. The clerk assures him that it was very nice, "just the right length," and the priest is relieved. "I am very glad to hear you say that," he says, "because just before I started to come here my dog got hold of my sermon and ate some of the leaves." The story was repeated again and again.

The first citation of the excuse in the Oxford English Dictionary is a 1929 article from the Manchester Guardian, which reads, "It is a long time since I have had the excuse about the dog tearing up the arithmetic homework." In Bel Kaufman's best-selling 1965 novel "Up the Down Staircase," a list of students' excuses for not having their homework includes "My dog went on my homework" and "My dog chewed it up." Even in 1965, however, it was still just another excuse.

"My dog ate my homework" became known as the quintessential far-fetched excuse in the next decade, when the phrase was used over and over. In a 1976 account of the Watergate tapes, E.C. Kennedy describes listening to President Richard Nixon "working on the greatest American excuse since the dog ate my homework." A 1977 article from Alaska's Daily News-Miner describes the difficulty students faced in coming up with a new excuse since "'My dog ate my term paper' is no longer acceptable."

The excuse was alluded to more throughout the 1980s. A 1982 Time magazine column on excuses suggested that "the dog ate my homework is a favorite with schoolchildren," while a 1987 New York Times column about how students were starting to blame malfunctioning computers and printers quoted one teacher as saying she recently received "a note from a student's mother saying the dog ate his homework."

Even the president picked up on the trend: When Congress pushed spending approval to the last minute in 1988, Ronald Reagan complained to reporters, "I had hoped that we had marked the end of the 'dog-ate-my-homework' era of congressional budgetry ... but it was not to be." After that, the phrase was all over television, including shows such as "The Simpsons" and "Full House."

Between 1990 and 2000, the phrase continued to grow in popularity. The New York Times wrote articles with headlines such as "Beyond 'Dog Ate My Homework' " and "Homework Help Sites (Or, the Dog Ate My U.R.L.)." The New Yorker described one criminal's accounts of his wrongdoings as having "a decided my-dog-ate-my-homework quality."

Not to be outdone, children's books tried to capitalize on the trend, with titles like "A Dinosaur Ate My Homework," "Aliens Ate My Homework," "Godzilla Ate My Homework" and even "My Teacher Ate My Homework."

While such book titles have continued into the 2000s, the phrase seems to finally be losing steam.

That means schoolkids will have to come up with a new, improved excuse.

• May I suggest that someone's going to drop the ball?
• Trump may owe $100 million from double-dip tax breaks, audit shows
• Minneapolis rideshare controversy shows growing power of progressive Democrats
• Rep. Ilhan Omar wins DFL endorsement over Don Samuels at Minneapolis convention
• See stunning photos of the northern lights from across Minnesota
• Mall of America water park plan prompts climate change concerns

NYC's Rikers Island jail gets a kid-friendly visitation room ahead of Mother's Day

Roger Corman, Hollywood mentor and 'King of the Bs,' dies at 98

Switzerland's Nemo wins 68th Eurovision Song Contest after event roiled by protests over Gaza war

They made one-of-a-kind quilts that captured the public's imagination. Then Target came along

Target to reduce number of stores carrying pride-themed merchandise after last year's backlash.

• 'Historic' northern lights dance in skies of Minnesota, much of U.S. May. 11
• Guthrie's 'Skeleton Crew' interrupted by medical emergency on opening night May. 11
• Guthrie's 'Skeleton Crew' interrupted by medical emergency on opening night • Stage & Arts
• These 12 home designs by Minnesota architects are winners in Home of the Month contest • Home & Garden
• The 5 best things our food writers ate in the Twin Cities area this week • Eat & Drink
• Yuen: Before she became known as Joe Mauer's mom, Teresa Mauer was a standout athlete • Variety
• Lileks: New 'The Office' spinoff takes place at a Midwestern newspaper • Variety

© 2024 StarTribune. All rights reserved.

• Newsletters
• Account Activating this button will toggle the display of additional content Account Sign out

Why Do We Say “The Dog Ate My Homework”?

The history of the delinquent schoolchild’s favorite excuse..

Did this sad Lab eat your homework?

iStockphoto.

Viacom announced on Monday that Mitt Romney had declined to appear on Nickelodeon’s Kids Pick the President special this year, citing time constraints. President Obama’s camp pounced on Romney’s decision, saying, “Kids demand details … ‘The dog ate my homework’ just doesn’t cut it when you’re running for president. ” When did “my dog ate my homework” become known as schoolchildren’s favorite excuse?

The 1970s. Delinquent schoolchildren and adults have been blaming their shortcomings on their pets for more than a century, but it wasn’t until the 1970s that “my dog ate my homework” came to be considered the No. 1 likely story. One of the first sad sacks who was said to blame his dog for his own ill-preparedness was a priest. In this anecdote, which appeared as early as 1905, a clergyman pulls his clerk aside after a service to ask him whether his sermon seemed long enough. The clerk assures him that it was very nice, “just the right length,” and the priest is relieved. “I am very glad to hear you say that,” he says, “because just before I started to come here my dog got hold of my sermon and ate some of the leaves .” The story was repeated again and again . The first citation of the excuse in the Oxford English Dictionary is a 1929 article from the Manchester Guardian , which reads, “It is a long time since I have had the excuse about the dog tearing up the arithmetic homework.” In Bel Kaufman’s best-selling 1965 novel Up the Down Staircase , a list of students’ excuses for not having their homework includes “ My dog went on my homework ” and “ My dog chewed it up .” Even in 1965, however, it was still just another excuse.

“My dog ate my homework” became known as the quintessential far-fetched excuse in the next decade, when the phrase was used over and over . In a 1976 account of the Watergate tapes, E.C. Kennedy describes listening to President Nixon “ working on the greatest American excuse since the dog ate my homework .” A 1977 article from Alaska’s Daily News-Miner describes the difficulty students faced in coming up with a new excuse since “ ‘My dog ate my term paper’ is no longer acceptable .”

The excuse was alluded to more and more throughout the 1980s. A 1982 Time magazine column on excuses suggested that “The dog ate my homework is a favorite with schoolchildren,” while a 1987 New York Times column about how students were starting to blame malfunctioning computers and printers quoted one teacher as saying she recently received “ a note from a student’s mother saying the dog ate his homework .” Even the president picked up on the trend: When Congress pushed spending approval to the last minute in 1988, Ronald Reagan complained to reporters, “ I had hoped that we had marked the end of the ‘dog-ate-my-homework’ era of Congressional budgetry … but it was not to be .” It was all over television, with references to the excuse on shows like The Simpsons and Full House . By 1989, the narrator of Saved by the Bell theme was singing, “ And the dog ate all my homework last night .”

The phrase continued to grow more popular. Between 1990 and 2000, the New York Times wrote articles with headlines such as “ Beyond ‘Dog Ate My Homework’ ” and “ Homework Help Sites (Or, the Dog Ate My U.R.L.) ,” while The New Yorker described one criminal’s accounts of his wrongdoings as having “a decided my-dog-ate-my-homework quality.” Children’s books tried to capitalize on the trend with titles like A Dinosaur Ate My Homework , Aliens Ate My Homework , Godzilla Ate My Homework , and My Teacher Ate My Homework , daring to use the term to promote reading and education. Such titles have continued into the 2000s, but in recent years the phrase seems to finally be losing steam .

Bonus Explainer: An Obama spokesperson also said, “ It’s no surprise Romney decided to play hookey .” Why do we call cutting school “playing hookey”? To play hookey began as an Americanism in the 19 th century. The earliest known citation comes from 1848, from John Russell Bartlett’s Dictionary of Americanisms , where it was said to mean “to play truant” and noted to be “ a term used among schoolboys, chiefly in the State of New York .” Word historians usually suggest that it’s from to hook it meaning to run away , a term as old as the Revolutionary War. However, others have proposed that it might derive from the Dutch expression hoekje spelen , the Dutch expression for “hide and seek”—especially since playing hooky emerged in New York during a time when it had a larger Dutch population.

Got a question about today’s news?  Ask the Explainer .

Explainer thanks Barry Popik, Jesse Sheidlower of the Oxford English Dictionary, and Ben Zimmer of the Visual Thesaurus and Vocabulary.com .

• Skip to main content
• Keyboard shortcuts for audio player

From Our Listeners

Sometimes the dog really does eat your homework.

Last week, we brought you the story of how the phrase "The Dog Ate My Homework" came to be and how it morphed into a palpably ridiculous excuse. Turns out, sometimes its not an excuse at all. Weekend Edition host Scott Simon has a few stories from our listeners that swear, honest, the dog did eat their homework.

Copyright © 2012 NPR. All rights reserved. Visit our website terms of use and permissions pages at www.npr.org for further information.

NPR transcripts are created on a rush deadline by an NPR contractor. This text may not be in its final form and may be updated or revised in the future. Accuracy and availability may vary. The authoritative record of NPR’s programming is the audio record.

the dog ate my homework

English [ edit ]

Phrase [ edit ].

• 2011 May 6, Damian Carrington, “Environment action delays blamed on 'dog ate my homework' excuses”, in The Guardian ‎ [1] , archived from the original on 2022-08-24 : Their reasons for missed deadlines are mostly of the " dog ate my homework variety" including such easily foreseeable events as yesterday's elections and that the badger culling policy is "difficult and sensitive".
• 2014 September 12, Oscar Webb, quoting Donald Campbell, “UK Government Changes Its Line On Diego Garcia Flight Logs Sought in Rendition Row - Again”, in VICE ‎ [2] , archived from the original on 2022-12-05 : The government's excuses for Diego Garcia's missing records are getting increasingly confused and desperate. Ministers could hardly be less credible if they simply said ' the dog ate my homework .'
• 2017 February 18, Mia Berman, “Go West-minster, Young Mastiff”, in HuffPost ‎ [3] , archived from the original on 2019-04-09 : Our immune system's weak; we've been sick as a dog, missing work and school, resorting to " the dog ate my homework " excuses amidst these frigid dog days of winter.

References [ edit ]

• English lemmas
• English phrases
• English multiword terms
• English terms with quotations

Navigation menu

• Craft and Criticism
• Fiction and Poetry
• News and Culture
• Lit Hub Radio
• Reading Lists

• Literary Criticism
• Craft and Advice
• In Conversation
• On Translation
• Short Story
• From the Novel
• Bookstores and Libraries
• Film and TV
• Art and Photography
• Freeman’s
• The Virtual Book Channel
• Behind the Mic
• Beyond the Page
• The Cosmic Library
• The Critic and Her Publics
• Emergence Magazine
• Fiction/Non/Fiction
• First Draft: A Dialogue on Writing
• The History of Literature
• I’m a Writer But
• Lit Century
• Tor Presents: Voyage Into Genre
• Windham-Campbell Prizes Podcast
• Write-minded
• The Best of the Decade
• Best Reviewed Books
• BookMarks Daily Giveaway
• The Daily Thrill
• CrimeReads Daily Giveaway

News, Notes, Talk

Fun fact: John Steinbeck’s dog ate the first draft of Of Mice and Men .

“The dog ate my homework” is, perhaps, the oldest excuse in the book. But it really happened to John Steinbeck! His dog, Toby, apparently ate half of the first manuscript of Of Mice and Men .

On this very day, May 27, 1936, he wrote :

Minor tragedy stalked. My setter pup, left alone one night, made confetti of about half of my manuscript book. Two months work to do over again. It set me back. There was no other draft. I was pretty mad, but the poor little fellow may have been acting critically. I didn’t want to ruin a good dog for a manuscript I’m not sure is good at all. He only got an ordinary spanking … I’m not sure Toby didn’t know what he was doing when he ate the first draft. I have promoted Toby-dog to be a lieutenant-colonel in charge of literature.

Dog lover that he was, at least he was in good humor about it! (Maybe the moral here is: if your first draft gets destroyed, don’t  terrier self up about it!)

As for Toby, maybe he really was trying to tell his owner that the first draft was  ruff and he didn’t want Steinbeck to setter for it. Or he was hounding him to finish the thing, already! Maybe he just didn’t like that Lennie accidentally killed that innocent dog in the book.

Or maybe Toby somehow knew that later in life, John Steinbeck would go on to write a travelogue with his other dog, a poodle named Charley.

• Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window)
• Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window)
• Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window)
• Click to share on Reddit (Opens in new window)
• Click to share on Tumblr (Opens in new window)
• Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window)
• Click to share on Pocket (Opens in new window)
• Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window)
• Click to print (Opens in new window)

to the Lithub Daily

May 6 – may 10, 2024.

• In praise of the student journalists covering university protests
• Adania Shibli on book bans and the destruction of Palestinian literature
• “Every love poem is a Palestine poem, and every Palestine poem is a love poem.” Mandy Shunnarah on Mahmoud Darwish and writing Palestinian poetry .

Lit hub Radio

• RSS - Posts

Literary Hub

Created by Grove Atlantic and Electric Literature

Sign Up For Our Newsletters

How to Pitch Lit Hub

Advertisers: Contact Us

Privacy Policy

Support Lit Hub - Become A Member

Become a Lit Hub Supporting Member : Because Books Matter

For the past decade, Literary Hub has brought you the best of the book world for free—no paywall. But our future relies on you. In return for a donation, you’ll get an ad-free reading experience , exclusive editors’ picks, book giveaways, and our coveted Joan Didion Lit Hub tote bag . Most importantly, you’ll keep independent book coverage alive and thriving on the internet.

Become a member for as low as $5/month

Have you ever had something unusual happen that was hard to explain?

Have you ever had a pet ruin something or disturb something and feel at a loss for how to explain it?

We’re going to look at how you can best express something like this in English.

We’re also going to look at why this “excuse” is often the source of a joke.

Here’s a question that helps to highlight this very issue.

Hi Lindsay, The situation I imagined is as follows: I have  work to write down for a minute of a proceeding conference. I have written down almost if it,but at that time my cat rolled around on my laptop. And just like that,  all of the data went away! Then I had to explain to my boss what happened, and I said “My cat disturbed me working. ” Anyway I can’t explain a suitable situation, but I was wondering which word is the most appropriate to use. -Keishu from Japan 

You Have To Understand The Cultural Joke Here

You have to first understand the slang here.

In American English, it’s a big joke to say “the dog ate my homework” because it’s known as a “fake” excuse.

It’s an excuse kids could make up as to why they didn’t do their work.

However, everyone knows that excuse, so the situation in the letter is VERY interesting because it’s actually true.

Recognize that this slang has become a joke, and then seek out other ways to say that this actual thing  has happened.

Make sure you understand every word you hear on All Ears English. Bring your English to the advanced level with new vocabulary and natural expressions. Subscribe and get the transcripts delivered by email. Learn to speak naturally with the American accent. Click here to subscribe and save 50%

Options For Saying Something Unusual Like This

When you look at the example here, the phrase “my cat disturbed me working” sounds a bit awkward.

I also wouldn’t say this because it’s more specific than that–the cat actually ruined your information physically.

Grammatically, you may want to say “my cat was disturbing me while I was working” or “my cat disturbed me while I was working”

But here, you’d want to be more specific.

Options For Saying Something Along These Lines

Here are a few different ways you could describe the movement of your cat.

These could be applied to situations with pets or even kids who may get a bit rambunctious !

• My cat rolled over (on) my keyboard : This works better than rolled about to express your point. It gives the image of actually rolling around too.
• My cat pounced on my keyboard : Shows that it was kind of a sneaky jump that took you off guard.
• My cat walked all over my keyboard : You want to be sure to put the emphasis on how bad it was when they walked all over it, and not just that they took a quick step.
• My cat jumped on my keyboard: It’s not as sneaky sounding as a pounce, but it’s like a regular jump that still surprised you.

Remember The Important Part of This Situation

The most important part of any of these phrases is to say that the data was lost.

This is what you want to emphasize because it’s caused a problem that you are trying to deal with.

You must also remember to apologize in this situation.

You may be asking for forgiveness or for help, depending on the outcome of the situation.

Always be honest about what happened for a variety of reasons.

Then ask for forgiveness or whatever help you may need to fix that situation.

This is largely cultural because of the “excuse joke” so you want to be specific, sincere, genuine, and apologetic.

You need a mix of the right specific vocabulary along with the right way to apologize.

Be honest about what happened, and be sure that you apologize.

Know that strange things happened, but honesty and an apology can help you to work through it.

If you have any questions, please leave them below in the comments section.

We’ll get back with you as soon as we can. 

Get Your Transcripts Today!

Make sure you understand every word you hear on All Ears English.

Bring your English to the advanced level with new vocabulary and natural expressions.

Subscribe and get the transcripts delivered by email.

Learn to speak naturally with the American accent.

Related Posts

• Cultural Differences in Business
• Business English

Business English 253: Profit Versus Nonprofit in American Business

Business english 252: change your mind and pivot in business english, business english 250: are you excel-savvy how to talk about your strengths in business english.

Privacy Overview

GREG BUSTIN’S

Executive leadership blog.

My Dog Ate My Homework… and Other Excuses

September 1st, 2015  | 

It’s back to school season.

Whether you’re a student or a business executive, the back-to-school vibe is noticeable in classrooms, cubicles and conference rooms as calendars fill more quickly, cooler weather energizes behavior, and new assignments adopt an increasing sense of urgency.

The period between Labor Day and Thanksgiving is my busiest time of year as I work with leadership teams in strategic planning sessions to help colleagues agree on priorities, responsibilities, and action items for the coming year and beyond.

Last year in Forbes Leadership Forum, I discussed why most company strategic plans fail . One reason is lack of accountability.

Talk is Cheap

Part of what makes accountability difficult is that when you work with smart people and things don’t get done well or on time, you often are handed excuses.

No organization—not even high-performing organizations— is immune from the well-crafted excuse. What separates high-performing organizations from all the others is the way in which excuses are handled.

“My dog ate my homework” is an excuse that sprang from a 1905 anecdote about a minister temporarily filling in for another minister.

At the time, William ApMadoc, a contributor to the Welsh journal The Cambrian , indicated the initial punchline had more to do with brevity than an excuse for non-performance.

In ApMadoc’s telling, a visiting minister asked a clerk how his sermon had been received, and, in particular, whether it had been long enough. Upon hearing from the clerk the length was sufficient, the minister replied that just before the service his dog had eaten some of the paper on which the sermon was written. “Well,” replied the clerk, who felt his regular preacher’s sermons could be shorter, “couldn’t you give our vicar a pup from your dog?”

It was not until 1965 in Bel Kaufman’s best-selling novel Up the Down Staircase that students blamed their failure to complete an assignment on their dogs.

Since then, “My dog ate my homework” has become code in and out of classrooms for a lame excuse.

In the workplace, time, talent and treasure (money) are the three commodities every organization has in common, and here’s what lack of accountability sounds like:

Time I put out fires all day, so there’s no time to work on my stuff. Our deadlines are unrealistic. The deadline was unclear. I spend my time doing my boss’s work. I spend my time doing work my staff should be doing. I spend my time on tactical—not strategic—work. We can’t always get it right the first time but we can make time to fix it. There’s no sense of urgency around here. I ran out of time. His performance will improve with time.

Talent We don’t have the right people. We don’t have enough people. We don’t have enough of the right people. The people on our team can’t think for themselves. He let me down. These people don’t report to me, so their work is not my fault. I didn’t know I was allowed to make that decision. I didn’t understand the assignment. It wasn’t my job. The changes we made are preventing me from getting things done. My team won’t like me if I confront their performance issues. People here are not team players. That person is a family member and the rules don’t apply to her. We can’t keep our best people so we are not very effective.

Treasure We underprice what we sell so we can’t staff properly. We can’t agree on priorities so our budgets are spread too thin. Our customers beat us up on price so we can’t charge more. We are constantly being asked to do more with less, including more work for the same salary. Money is tight so we can’t hire the people we need.

It’s a vicious circle, and the excuses are infinite.

Talk is cheap so we often buy it. When we do, accountability suffers.

Moving from Excuses to Accountability

As leaders, we get the behavior we tolerate. So when it comes to holding people accountable, we are often our own worst enemy.

That was my story.

Despite achieving record financial results year over year, the firm I founded and led could have accomplished more. There would have been more fun and less drama if I knew then what I know now about accountability.

At the time, I accepted excuses that sounded logical even when I knew better. I allowed emotions to cloud my decision making. I delayed having a conversation with my underperforming partner because it was easier to avoid a difficult conversation than having one. Instead of practicing accountability, I practiced avoidance.

By the time I asked my partner to leave, I had learned three valuable lessons:

• Clear expectations must be established. I assumed my partner and I both had the same definition of success. We didn’t. My failure to set clear expectations meant evaluating his performance was subjective. Excuses were plentiful, performance was lacking and accountability was non-existent. When your purpose, expectations, and rewards are crystal clear, your employees will embrace accountability as a way to become even more successful. The opposite is also true: If you are not clear about everything—vision, values, objectives, strategy, rewards, and, yes, penalties—the likelihood of achieving your vision is slim.
• Bad news does not improve with age. I avoided discussing my partner’s performance issues for too long because I assumed his performance would improve. Now I know that as soon as you see a problem, it’s best to address it immediately. Failure to speak frankly with the person about his or her performance means nothing will change.
• It’s not personal. Yes, you’re talking with a person, but leave excuses, emotions, and opinions behind. Stick to the facts, set a plan to get performance back on track, and communicate specific consequences for underperformance. If underperformers require termination, do it professionally and move on.

The day after we separated, my partner called to say he appre­ciated the straightforward, professional, and respectful manner in which I had handled our final meeting.

Even though these com­ments reflected well on his gracious acceptance of tough news, they reminded me that everyone feels better when accountability issues are addressed.

Excuses are substitutes for effort.

As a leader, be careful you’re not creating excuses for yourself over a difficult decision that is yours alone to make.

Download my Free eBooks on Accountability

About the Author: Greg Bustin advises some of the world’s most admired companies and leaders, and he’s dedicated a career to working with CEOs and the leadership teams of hundreds of companies in a range of industries. He’s facilitated more than 250 strategic planning sessions, he’s delivered more than 600 keynotes and workshops on every continent except Antarctica, and he coaches leaders who are inspired to take their career to the next level. His fourth leadership book— Accountability: The Key to Driving a High-Performance Culture (McGraw-Hill) —is a Soundview Executive Best Business Book.

RECENT POSTS

• The Culture Crashers
• Eclipses, Excuses + You
• The Accountability Funnel
• The Wit & Wisdom of Lincoln
• Planning a Successful Year?
• A Silent Sermon
• A Paradoxical Season
• Find Blessings Amid Adversity
• 10 Scary Questions
• 7 Essential Questions Your Strategic Plan Must Address
• Accountability
• Conflict Resolution
• Customer Service
• Goal Setting
• Organization Health
• Problem Solving
• Productivity
• Social Media
• Strategic Planning

Hurricane Katrina 10 Years Later: What Did We Learn?      |      Play Like a Champion

Ready to reset?

Attend my free accountability webinar: i did it to set and achieve your 2021 goals..

REGISTER FOR FREE

• February 17th from 11 AM – 12:30 PM Central Time
• My free webinar will help you: – Sharpen your personal goals – Improve time management – Tackle tough work-related issues – Support remote workers

Learn More To dive even deeper into the topic of accountability, I invite you to purchase a copy of my bestselling book, “Accountability: The Key to Driving a High-Performance Culture.”

Get The Book

Become a better leader.

Download my three free e-books..

Please enter your information below to access a digital download link for my three free eBooks. Once submitted, you will receive an email with a link to download the eBooks.

Sign up to receive free tips on business, leadership, and life., please enter your information below to start receiving free tips on business, leadership, and life., get my latest book how leaders decide, history has much to offer today’s current and aspiring leaders..

Business schools teach case studies. Hollywood blockbusters are inspired by true events.

Exceptional leaders are students of history. Decision-making comes with the territory.

April 18, 2014

Contemporary Fiction , Education

The Dog Ate My Homework

It seemed like the most plausible excuse at the time: blame the new dog for eating up my now overdue essay. But then I just had to embellish...

Karen Donley-Hayes

• Share on Facebook (opens new window)
• Share on Twitter (opens new window)
• Share on Pinterest (opens new window)

Weekly Newsletter

The best of The Saturday Evening Post in your inbox!

The fact of the matter was, I didn’t have anyone else to blame. So I blamed Roscoe–perhaps ill-advised, him being my father’s K-9 partner-in-waiting, but I had completely forgotten my homework. I wasn’t in the habit of lying or putting blame where it didn’t belong, but I was caught off guard–daydreaming about Roscoe, in fact. My third grade teacher now loomed over my desk, expectant, her hand outstretched, fingers wiggling. And in my deer-in-the-headlights stare, with Miss Underwood frowning down at me, the words blurted out all on their own.

“Roscoe ate it.”

Subscribe and get unlimited access to our online magazine archive.

“What?” Miss Underwood scowled more, if that were possible. She planted her fists against her ample hips and leaned in, hovering over me.

I blinked, swallowed a spitless lump in my throat, and having already lied, promptly repeated myself. “Roscoe ate it,” I said with slightly more conviction.

Miss Underwood stood stiff, smack dab in front of my desk, so close I should have been able to smell the little flowers on her dress. I had an overpowering impulse to move away from her, but my chair shackled me to the spot. I stared at the vibrant gladiola sprouting out from beneath Miss Underwood’s belt, and felt the entire class’s attention span shake from all else and swoop down on me.

“Mister Pike. You are not lying to me, are you?” It was more a challenge than a question.

Miss Underwood absolutely terrified me–almost as much as did the prospect of acquiring the entire class’s ridicule or getting caught in a bald-faced lie–and such terror can be a remarkable survival mechanism, because my brain spun a web and my mouth spewed it out without so much as consulting with me. I sat, breathless and rapt with the rest of the class, listening to this story unfold.

“Oh, no ma’am,” a voice–my voice–poured out of me, my brain, frenetic, only barely keeping a syllable ahead of my mouth. “I wrote my report on the metamorphosis of tadpoles into frogs,” I heard. (It was a good thing I had recently become fascinated by this amphibious process and had not only been reading about it but observing it in the natural setting of our backyard.) “And I took the paper with me to the pond so that I could look at them and draw pictures to show the stages, and Roscoe came with me, and I had a tadpole on the top of the paper so I could trace it and Roscoe saw it and before I knew what happened he jumped on it and swallowed it whole, and the paper.”

I shifted my bug-eyed gaze up the floral landscape to the teacher’s face. Miss Underwood remained completely still.

“And the rock that I had holding the paper down,” my voice said. Her eye twitched, barely perceptible. “And the pencil I was using.” Her brows drew closer together. “And then it was dark, and I couldn’t draw them again, and then I had to do my chores and it was time for bed.”

Miss Underwood frowned, unwedged one hand from her hip and pointed at my chest. “You’d better be sure to get that dog to the vet, young man.”

“Yes, ma’am.” I nodded vigorously. “We’re taking him this afternoon.”

“Good,” she said. “And re-write your report and bring it in tomorrow. Along with a report on how Roscoe did at the vet’s.”

“Yes, ma’am,” I said, and wondered if the pittance I had in the Mason jar under my bed could buy me a plane, train, or boat ticket anywhere else in the world.

That afternoon, when I slouched from the school bus, Roscoe careened down the driveway to meet me, his half-grown legs all knobs and paws flying indiscriminately; he seemed none the worse for wear for his “misadventure” of the day before. I trudged up the driveway, the pup orbiting around me, bounding and panting, pausing only to wolf down my mother’s lone remaining gladiola. While my reporting of late had been very light on honesty, there was truth to the fact that Roscoe was a one-canine mauling, gulping, devouring, completely-nondiscriminatory eating machine. The gladiolas, much to my mother’s dismay, had vanished into his maw during a single galumphing frenzy; this was shortly after Roscoe had discovered the infinite wonders that the frog pond in the backyard held. Mom had admonished my father to restrain the dog. Dad had testified that socialization was critical to Roscoe’s mental development and future as a police dog. Mom declared her flowers unfair casualties. Dad promised to build a fence for her gardens (a moot point, as Roscoe had already decimated them).

The sound of my mother’s footsteps on the porch drew my attention; I looked up to see Roscoe gleefully caprioling by her side. She had her arms crossed over her chest, and was staring at me with an expression that immediately made me slow my already lethargic trudge.

“I hear Roscoe ate your homework,” she said. There was no tone of accusation or belief–or even disbelief, for that matter–just a simple statement. I stopped and looked up at her, and for two ticks of a heartbeat I was on the verge of coming clean. I steeled myself to admit my lie, to face the consequences, and to be a better man for it. During those two ticks of a heartbeat, Roscoe splayed himself on the porch and latched onto one of the banister posts, gnawing and grunting.

“Yes ma’am,” I said, and felt the heat rise under my collar as I lied to my own mother. I looked intently at Roscoe (who supported my story with his every action) to avoid looking in my mother’s eyes. I heard her sigh.

“Well, alright then. I called Dr. Brown’s office as soon as Miss Underwood phoned me, so let’s get things together and get going. Hopefully, he’ll be fine; it’s that rock I’m worried about.”

I nodded and walked up the porch steps, head down and ashamed, and slipped past my mother, past the squirming, euphoric mass of German shepherd enthusiasm. My mother stayed on the porch while I dropped my book bag on the kitchen table. Roscoe leapt up, flung himself against her legs. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw her reach down idly and rub his head. He gazed up at her adoringly, his tongue lolling out of his mouth, wood splinters flecking his lips; his tailed swished nonstop across the porch.

“Maybe the paper and rock and all just went right through him,” I said, and hoped that if a dog actually were to eat a paper and a rock, they might actually move right along. Otherwise, I was going to be busted when the vet checked the dog out and declared him devoid of foreign objects. Not that I wanted him to have a problem; I didn’t, but his clean bill of health was my sentence. Granted, it was of my own making.

“I hope so,” Mom’s voice came in from the porch. I heard her add, under her breath, “Roscoe, you’re going to be the death of me if you live long enough.”

In the vet’s waiting room, I studiously worked on my tadpole-to-frog report, shielding it from Roscoe, who my mother worked up a sweat restraining. And when it was finally his turn to go in and be examined, and I was left with silence and the weight of my own guilt, I could barely remember the details of amphibian metamorphosis, much less write about them. Mom, quiet, read a paperback. The clock on the wall ticked off five minutes, 10, 15; the smell of the waiting room mixed with the odor of wet dog, cat pee, and rodent cage litter, and I began to feel nauseous.

“How’s your paper coming?” Mom asked. I shrugged. I sweated.

I was nearly to the point of breaking down and admitting my guilt, or at least bolting from the waiting room and into the parking lot, when Dr. Brown summoned us. Mom clutched her purse, and I drooped behind her, a condemned man going to the gallows. The vet brought us into the execution chamber, and closed the door. The harsh florescent lights gleamed, ruthless and all-seeing. Roscoe was not in the room to witness my punishment.

Dr. Brown cleared his throat. I felt a prickling thrill of sweat, and stared fixedly at the poster of canine parasites on the wall. “Well, we took x-rays of Roscoe, and we don’t see your rock or your paper.”

I couldn’t help a fleeting glance at the vet; he met my eyes for a beat, then looked over at Mom. “But it’s a good thing you brought him in, because we did see something else.”

I blinked, confused.

“Oh?” my mother said.

Dr. Brown turned his back to us, popped a thick sheet of film against a panel, and turned on the light behind it. Ribs and spine and gray masses flickered to light. Dr. Brown glanced over his shoulder toward us. Both Mom and I leaned toward the glowing image. Dr. Brown cleared his throat again and pointed to something in the middle of the picture. I looked closer, squinted, and then with a sting of recognition, I understood the image on the screen. My mother realized at the same time, and she chuffed, glancing sidelong at me.

“This,” Dr. Brown said, tapping the image of my G.I. Joe, recently MIA, “needs to come out. And it won’t come out the easy way like that rock did,” he glanced down at me again. “It will snag other things he swallows, and you’re going to have a bad emergency situation, maybe a dead dog.”

My mother reached for the collar of her blouse, pressed her hand flat. “Oh, no. Oh, poor Roscoe!”

My skin prickled again, but I wasn’t worried about my guilt and punishment anymore. “Will he be okay?” My voice sounded tiny and tremulous. “He won’t really die, will he?”

Dr. Brown smiled then. “No, I think we got him in time. We’ll put him on the surgery schedule for the morning, and he should be right as rain in a month’s time.” He reached a hand out and ruffled my hair. I realized I was crying. “In a way, it’s a good thing he ate your homework, otherwise you might not have found out about this until it was too late.”

I looked up at him lamely.

That weekend, Dad fenced off what was left of Mom’s gardens, I patrolled the entire house and yard and commandeered all swallowable objects (and even some that didn’t seem swallowable), and my folks and I discussed the new obedience regimen for Roscoe. When he came home a few days later, belly shaved but none-the-worse for wear, I doted on him and chaperoned him vigilantly. After a short period of gorging withdrawal, Roscoe adjusted gleefully to his obedience training, and was already ahead of the learning curve when he officially entered his police-dog training.

I was too ashamed to ever admit to my parents my panic-induced homework fabrication. I like to think that the guilt and anxiety I experienced for that long afternoon was punishment enough, and sometimes, I also like to think that it was all part of the plan for Roscoe’s long and decorated life. I like to think that, but I don’t believe it much more than Miss Underwood believed me.

Become a Saturday Evening Post member and enjoy unlimited access. Subscribe now

Recommended

May 03, 2024

Contemporary Fiction , Fiction

Apr 26, 2024

The Random Arts Project

M.C. Schmidt

Apr 19, 2024

Four Photos and a Screen Name

Craig Church

I love reading K. Donley’s fiction & non fiction. There is always an element of curiosity and expectancy that keeps my attention and wanting to discover. Her sentences are like little paintings that color and shape the atmosphere and lend to the feeling of actually being “there.” Keep writing K. Donley!

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

The Dog Blog

Categories:.

• Bil-Jac History
• Bil-Jac News
• Grooming and Care

Health and Nutrition

• Seasonal Tips
• Training and Behavior
• Wellbeing Tips

My Dog Ate My Homework: How to Correct Unwanted Dog Behavior

Sometime throughout your life you may have heard (or possibly used) the old expression, “the dog ate my homework.” Hopefully, you haven’t had to actually deal with your four-legged friend using your work assignment as a midday snack. If they are exhibiting unwanted behavior like chewing on things that aren’t theirs, we can help.

Dogs, especially puppies, are delicate animals that need to feel loved, safe, and secure within our homes. When our furry friends do something we don’t like, the last thing we want to do is try to correct the behavior in a way that makes them feel confused or scared. Luckily, there are plenty of positive ways to address and correct your dog’s behavior that won’t cause unnecessary stress for you or your pooch.

Identifying Bad Behavior

Before you can correct your dog’s bad habits, you need to be able to identify what is and is not bad behavior. Though some “bad” behaviors are common characteristics of all dogs, the problem arises when the action becomes excessive, damaging, or unwelcome.

Common bad habits that may need to be addressed include:

• Excessive barking
• Biting and/or nipping

It is important to remember that a lot of factors can impact a dog’s behavior. Their breed, age, medical history, and past experiences all shape how they act and how they may respond to training. There are also many different reasons why your dog may act out that range from separation anxiety to sheer boredom .

Is your dog acting out because they are seeking attention? Or maybe they are just unfamiliar with a new situation and that makes them anxious. It is helpful to identify potential causes of behavior problems to help better understand what training they may need.

No matter the reason for the misdeeds, it’s important to stop undesirable behavior before it becomes part of your dog’s normal routine. Luckily, there are a few methods you can use to address and correct bad behavior that when executed properly, can help most dogs curb their harmful habits.

Preventing Bad Behavior

Once you have identified your dog’s bad behavior, you can begin to formulate a plan to address and correct the troublesome trait. The most important factor to remember is that punishment is not the answer. Instead, use positive reward-based correction and training to teach your dog that good things happen when they do what you ask.

Corrections Instead of Punishments

Corrections are used to help your pup learn right from wrong. The purpose of a correction is to demonstrate a fact to your dog, while gaining the ability to understand, and reduce, unwanted behaviors. We all make mistakes, but it’s important to teach our dogs to avoid the behaviors we don’t want, and to encourage them with the behaviors we do want. This makes for a happy home for both pup and pup parent.

Several behavioral corrections can be used to train your pooch the right and safe way. Two of the more popular correction methods are withholding a reward and reprimanding.

Withholding a Reward

During your training sessions, try giving your dog commands and reward them with some delicious Bil-Jac Little Jacs Training Treats  for the right behavior and withhold the treat if they do any unwanted dog behavior.

By repeating this exercise several times with your pooch, they will start to understand that they are only rewarded for doing the thing you want them to do. This form of training will help your dog create a positive association with good behaviors, which is much more effective than punishing a dog for bad behavior.

In contrast, withholding a reward when he or she doesn’t follow direction will teach your furry friend to avoid that behavior in the future. For some pups, withholding a reward is all they need to correct their bad dog behavior.

Reprimanding the Puppy

When withholding a reward isn’t enough, sometimes it makes sense to reprimand your puppy. This may sound intimidating, but reprimanding your puppy is not about scaring them or hurting your four-legged friend. Instead, it is simply creating a learning moment your dog can recognize as out of the norm to help signal something is not right.

Giving a simple but firm ‘NO!’ with a finger point or a brief leash tug is enough to alert your pup that they need to make an adjustment. By doing this, and withholding a reward, your dog should learn to adjust their behavior fairly quickly.

Redirection

Another way to correct unwanted dog behavior is through redirection. A lot of behavior that we as pet parents deem as “bad” is oftentimes just instinctive habits our pup can’t fully turn off. Chewing, barking, and digging are all habits that come naturally to our dogs, so it may be impossible to fully stop these behaviors. What we can do, however, is redirect our dog’s attention to less damaging activities when these “bad” behaviors occur.

If your dog is chewing, digging, jumping, or exhibiting a behavior you don’t like, offer them their favorite chew toy, play a few rounds of tug, or take them for a jog around the block. Sometimes even some basic exercise can help burn off steam and distract them from their initial bad actions.

S ocialization

When it comes to correcting unwanted dog behavior, socialization goes a long way.

Sometimes our furry friends act up because they are anxious, confused, or scared. When you regularly socialize your pup , they become more accustomed to different sounds, smells, and new sensations. These new experiences help your dog learn how to relax in unfamiliar situations, and in turn they are less likely to overreact or exhibit bad behavior like barking, jumping, biting, and chasing when caught off guard.

Work With a Trainer

Sometimes it can be hard to figure out what our dog’s need. Luckily, dog trainers are a great resource to lean on when we aren’t sure how to help our furry friends. Professional Animal Trainer and TV Show Host Joel Silverman is a phenomenal source of information when it comes to raising, training , and caring for dogs of all ages. When asked about curbing bad behavior, Silverman offers some helpful advice to keep in mind:

“If you can catch a dog right when he’s starting to dig or chew and say, ‘knock it off,’ now you’re sending a message the dog can understand,” Silverman explains. “A verbal correction combined with preventative training, which is not giving the dog the opportunity to be in that situation, is how you get rid of those problems.”

Ultimately, the most important thing to do when you want to correct unwanted dog behavior is to remember that practice makes perfect. Dogs are smart and social animals and want to please their dog parents, so regularly reinforcing good behavior will help them stay consistent. Plus, training your pup and using corrections is a great way to build your bond and ensure a healthy and happy home for the whole family.

Want to learn more about what you can do to keep your furry friend happy, healthy, and well-behaved? Join our Best Friends Club today to receive our exclusive email newsletter full of informative articles, training tips, and members-only discounts on Bil-Jac dog food, treats, and other products.

Related Blog Posts

Training and Behavior, Lifestyle

How to Choose the Right Obedience School for Your Dog

Helping your Puppy Blow Off Steam

Training and Behavior Lifestyle, Training and Behavior

4 Tips for Socializing Your New Puppy

Monitoring a Healthy Weight for Your Puppy

Little-Jacs®

Small size is perfect for treating any time.

Little Gooberlicious®

Great treats for training or an everyday snack.

America's VetDogs® Training Treats

Official Training Treat of America’s VetDogs Organization

Smart-Jacs® Digestive Support

Help deliver healthy digestion in a soft, delicious treat!

The Puppy Club

Sign up for exclusive puppy information to help you raise a happy and healthy best friend!

Best Friends Club

Sign up to receive the latest news!

• Funny Poems
• Poems by Subject
• Funny Poems by Email
• Classic Poems
• Poems by Reading Level
• Poetry Minute
• Nursery Rhymes
• Poems by Length
• Famous Children’s Poets
• Surprise Me!
• Poems by Poetic Technique
• Other Poetry Websites and Resources
• Poetry Writing Lessons
• Rhyming Dictionary
• Lists of Rhyming Words
• Poetry Activities
• Poetic Terms Dictionary
• About Kenn Nesbitt
• School Author Visits
• Event Calendar
• Contact Kenn
• Custom Poems

My Dog Does My Homework

A Funny Dog Poem for Kids

From the book When the Teacher Isn't Looking

My dog does my homework at home every night. He answers each question and gets them all right.

There’s only one problem with homework by Rover. I can’t turn in work that’s been slobbered all over.

 — Kenn Nesbitt

Copyright © 2005. All Rights Reserved.

Reading Level: Grade 2 Topics: Animal Poems , School Poems Poetic Techniques: Anthropomorphism & Personification , Descriptive Poems , Irony Word Count: 41

Use This Poem

Would you like to use this poem in your classroom? Would you like permission to reprint, record, recite or broadcast this poem, or set it to music? Please click on one of the following links for permissions and reprint rights information:

• Publishers, editors and anthologists

Member Login

Rhyming dictionary for kids.

Type any word here to find all the words that rhyme with it

Support Poetry4kids

Get Poems by Email

Visit My Other Websites

Find the Best Kids Books

What are you looking for.