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Posted on Apr 18, 2022

How to Write a Self-Help Book (That Actually Helps People)

✍️ This post was written by Kleopatra Olympiou, a writer from Cyprus and holder of an MA in Creative Writing from Durham University.

You’ve overcome an obstacle or problem and learned some important life lessons — now you want to write a self-help book and share your experience and wisdom with other people. You’re ready to give them the tools they need to grow and improve their lives. 

This post walks you through the whole process, sharing some tips from expert self-help editors on the Reedsy marketplace. Here’s how you can write your own self-help book:

1. Identify a specific problem your book will remedy

2. make your readers believe you can help them, 3. don’t forget that you’re telling a story , 4. give your readers specific actions they can take, 5. pick an appealing and informative title (and subtitle), 6. always cite your sources, 7. give readers something extra at the end.

To some extent, nonfiction books (with the important exception of memoirs and creative nonfiction) are about identifying a problem and offering a solution. This could mean practical, step-by-step advice or a deeper, more nuanced understanding of an existing situation that changes the reader’s perception. Self-help books are no different: your job as a writer is to zero in on a particular problem, and provide your reader a way to deal with it.

Accept that you need to limit your scope

Many self-help writers begin with a very general idea, like overcoming mental illness or becoming a happier person. Broad, abstract topics like this are great as a first instinct, but you’ll need to refine the scope of your book for the sake of your readers, your sanity, and your commercial potential. 

Abstract concepts are hard to comprehensively address in a helpful way that provides concrete insights and advice. They’re also notoriously difficult to sell to a traditional self-help publisher , who will be looking for something new and unique with a defined target audience. As of March 2022, there are over 70,000 titles in the Self-Help category on Amazon — so writing a generic book about “finding happiness” won’t quite cut it. 

Distill your idea

A good way to focus the scope of your book is to fill in the blanks of this imaginary pledge to your reader:

If you are ____ and your problem is ____, I can help you by ____.

This pledge helps you identify your audience, the problem they’re facing, and its solution. We’ll use ParentShift: Ten Universal Truths That Will Change the Way You Raise Your Kids by Wendy Thomas Russell, Linda Hatfield, and Ty Hatfield as a vehicle to explore all three. 

Understanding your target audience is crucial when writing any type of nonfiction. Not only will it help you market your book , but it will also be the driving force that shapes your book and helps you write it well . After all, how can you help someone if you don’t know who they are and what they need?

So ask yourself who will gain the most from the material in your book. The answer should be as specific as possible. Let’s look at  ParentShift: Ten Universal Truths That Will Change the Way You Raise Your Kids . 

And don’t just stop there, think about location, cultural context, and occupation: parents who work full-time might especially need fast solutions — with triple shifts, play dates and a mountain of housework to stay on top of, ten universal truths might be as much as they can handle. The more detail you have on your demographic, the easier it will be to target them. 

After you’ve located your target audience, figure out the precise aspects of their problem (or “pain point”) and identify the many shapes they might take. ParentShift , for example, immediately sets up a problem: you’re struggling with raising your children, you know it, and common parenting methods aren’t working for you.

When you’ve identified your central problem, make it visible in the title, subtitle, or blurb, so that your audience can tell that this book is for them right away. 

How does a book on terrible teens and toddlers solve the problem of mediocre parenting? Well, as ParentShift ’s blurb notes, it “challenges some of our most popular disciplinary tools and replaces them with more than a dozen ‘toolkits’ designed to help parents solve virtually any household without sabotaging their long term goals.” In other words, this book helps you analyze your problem in new ways, and shows you alternative courses of action. 

Presumably, this is the kind of insight that made you want to write a book in the first place, so we’ll assume you have a good understanding of your own ideas here — but just in case the thoughts are getting jumbled in your mind, try talking out your ideas with a friend to make sure they’re easy to understand and you’re able to communicate them clearly. Then put pen to paper, and repeat the process!

The success of a self-help book hinges entirely on your credibility and authority as a writer. After all, you wouldn’t wander down the street asking random people to help you improve your life, would you? That’s why you’ll often see beloved media personalities publish self-help books: they have an inbuilt audience of people who already trust them.

But how can you create trust with prospective readers if you’re not Russell Brand or Oprah Winfrey ? Two ways to do this involve sharing facts about yourself — the third, and sometimes forgotten one, has to do with style and structure.

Qualifications tell readers others can vouch for your knowledge

One way in which authors can show that they’re authoritative sources is by noting any relevant qualifications. For example, Brené Brown regularly cites her work as a researcher and psychology professor when examining the kinds of people who struggle to be vulnerable in her book Daring Greatly . But university degrees aren’t the only qualification that matters — take Matthieu Ricard, for example, whose book The Art of Meditation is infinitely more appealing because of the fact that its writer is a Buddhist monk, and so someone the reader trusts to know meditation well.

Personal experiences say “I’ve been there”

By opening up and sharing stories from your personal past, you show readers you’re speaking from real, first-hand experience — not just theorizing from a distance. For example, Louise Hay’s self-help classic, The Power Is Within You , followed her many years of work with HIV/AIDS patients and her own experience of cervical cancer, and focuses on how positive thought patterns can help lead to improved wellbeing. Were Hay not speaking from experience, skeptical readers might struggle to see why they should read her book — but by letting millions of readers walk a mile in her shoes, she gave them a reason to listen to what she had to say.

Persuasive style and structure matter the most

While it’s important that readers can see that you are worthy of their trust, resist the urge to turn your book into a LinkedIn page of your Expert Qualifications. 

Elaine O’Neill , a former Hay House Commissioning Editor, points out that self-help writers often miss a trick in getting readers to believe in them by neglecting style and structure: 

"One mistake that I find new self-help authors make more often than anything else is forgetting their reader. They believe they have to include everything they've learned into their manuscript, without thinking about what the reader needs to learn, and how to feed it to them bit by bit. Authors can show their authority by really knowing their reader inside out and speaking to them directly, by sharing their own recovery from the same issue. 

“You want the reader to feel seen by you, and once they do, they'll trust your expertise because you've been there — and you can see they are too.”

Didacticism never works

Fiction readers are notoriously intolerant of didactic narratives — self-help books are a slightly different story, because the writer is, by default, in the position of a teacher. That said, no one likes to be spoken down to, and a superior tone will not help you assert your expertise. You aren’t running for president of the Nobel committee — you just want a reader to like you enough to listen, so make an effort to communicate your knowledge in a style of language that speaks to them.

📚 Still not sure how to present yourself? Head to our list of the 50 Best Self-Help Books of All Time and check out how each of these authors presents themselves as an authority figure.

Self-help books rarely follow a single, overarching narrative arc . Typically, they’re guided not by a narrative but by an argument or thesis — with chapters structured around stories that help illustrate the points made. 

Structure intuitively for a great reading experience

How do you make sure your book is readable, compact, and flows logically from chapter to chapter? By committing to a detailed outline before you even start to write. In traditional publishing, you will almost always first draft a book proposal which will serve as an excellent plan. But even if you’re self-publishing , making a plan is well worth your time to ensure that every chapter is necessary and contributes value.

As with novels, good beginnings can make or break a self-help book. Your introduction should tell readers a little about you and why you’re writing a book. It should also give them a quick, at-a-glance summary of what will follow. Chapter 1 is where you’ll start getting to the meat of things, sketching out the complexities of the central problem. After that, it’s up to you how the rest of the book will be structured.

If this is a point you’re really struggling with, focus on getting all your thoughts out instead, and make a note of questions or concerns to bring up with your editor later. Speaking of editors, you can request quotes from some of the best self-help editors in the industry for free, right here on Reedsy:

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Learn how Reedsy can help you craft a beautiful book.

Solidify through anecdotes and emotional storytelling

Ideally, you should structure each chapter of your self-help book around a specific point or insight — and the best way to illustrate each point is through a story or anecdote, whether it’s personal, hypothetical, or entirely fictional. Stories have the great effect of eliciting an emotional response or more active interest by involving a character that readers can empathize with or watch with curiosity. 

Need an example? Think of the way Christianity’s teachings are shared through the parables Jesus taught lessons with: the story of the good Samaritan is infinitely more memorable than “be kind.”

Storytelling also creates interest and suspense , keeping readers invested — take a look at Dale Carnegie’s How to Win Friends and Influence People , the first chapter of which starts as follows: 

“On May 7, 1931, the most sensational manhunt New York City had ever known had come to its climax. After weeks of search, ‘Two Gun’ Crowley—the killer, the gunman who didn’t smoke or drink—was at bay, trapped in his sweetheart’s apartment on West End Avenue.”

Only tell stories that add to your message

Self-help editor Danielle Goodman emphasizes the need to only tell stories worth telling: “When it comes to self-help books, proof of concept is absolutely necessary. That’s why story-telling can be so powerful. It lifts your advice from the page and places it in the real world of real people, like yourself and your readers. 

“The main question to ask yourself when telling pieces of your story is: Is what I’m writing in service of my message? In other words, how does this story underscore what you want the reader to feel, understand, and act on? 

“Once you know the answer, be explicit in connecting the dots for the reader. Tell them exactly why you included this story and what you want them to get out of it. And if you can’t quite figure out why this story is important to your message, leave it out for now.” 

The self-help genre is often more abstract than, say, how-to guides or even memoir, so your book may run the risk of being too woolly in its advice.  And if you’ve ever tried to get travel directions from someone who sorta kinda knows the way to the library, you’ll know how frustrating vagueness can be.

Self-help editor Kate Victory Hannisian says that “one indicator that you haven’t made your self-help advice completely clear is a comment from editors or beta-readers like this: ‘Great, but how does someone actually DO that?’

“Sometimes the solution is to see if you can break that advice into bite-sized, actionable steps. Other times, adding specific examples and vivid anecdotes with a few well-chosen details can help make your advice real and relatable for your target reader, and thus more useful to them. Depending on the type of self-help book you’re writing, these examples may come from your own experience or other sources, but the key is knowing that it’s important to show, don’t tell — even in nonfiction writing.”

Free course: How to Master the ‘Show, Don’t Tell’ Rule

You've probably heard this classic piece of writing advice a thousand times. But what does ‘Show, Don't Tell’ actually mean?

To make sure your actionable points aren’t lost in the storytelling, you can offer a recap at the end of each chapter. Heather Heying and Bret Weinstein’s A Hunter-Gatherer's Guide to the 21st Century re-iterates each of its chapters perfectly, summarizing the main takeaways in bullet points — but you can go a step further and offer a checklist of actions to take or questions the reader can ask themselves to diagnose their own needs.

Self-help titles are generally pretty formulaic, and nearly always include a subtitle:

 [Attention-Grabbing Phrase]:[Description of the Book] 

You can see this formula in action with self-help titles like:

• The 4-Hour Work Week : Escape the 9-5, Live Anywhere and Join the New Rich
• The Self-Love Habit : Transform fear and self-doubt into serenity, peace and power
• The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook : A Proven Way to Accept Yourself, Build Inner Strength, and Thrive

So what do you need to bear in mind when you title your own book ? Let’s do a super-quick linguistic analysis of this genre’s common title elements. 🧠

a) Direct address

Many self-help titles address the reader directly with the second person pronoun ‘you’. As with fiction written in second person point of view , directly addressing your reader has an immediate and personal effect, especially if the title catches a reader’s eye on a store shelf or online. Here are a few examples:

• You Are a Badass by Jen Sincero
• Make Your Bed by Admiral William H. McRaven
• Declutter Your Mind by S.J. Scott ⁠and Barrie Davenport
• Your Money or Your Life by Vicki Robin & Joe Dominguez

b) Imperatives

Authoritative statements are attention-grabbing in the same way that second person is: by being immediate. Titles that use imperatives put this most powerful of grammatical moods to use in order to command the reader’s attention. Can’t think of any? Here’s a few:

• Stay Sexy & Don't Get Murdered by Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark ⁠
• Stick with Exercise for a Lifetime by Robert Hopper 
• Find Your Artistic Voice by Lisa Congdon
• Keep Going by Austin Kleon

c) An inspirational tone

• Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert
• Radical Acceptance by Tara Brach
• The Magic of Thinking Big by David J. Schwartz
• Street Smart Disciplines of Successful People by Mark Mullins and John Kuhn

d) Search-optimized subtitle

When self-help covers feature these inspirational titles, they often need a subtitle to contextualize the contents of the book. These relatively prosaic second titles give a more informative description of what readers can expect. 

🚨Watch your capitals! Head over to our post covering established title capitalization rules to make sure your title is correct.

That much is obvious — what fewer people realize is that titles are often search-optimized, meaning that they are written to contain some important keywords or terms related to the topic being discussed. This helps the book be found by readers searching for those terms on Amazon. Take a look at the titles below, and notice the keywords in their subtitles — bolded for your convenience:

• The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment by Eckhart Tolle
• Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World by Cal Newport
• Stolen Focus: Why You Can't Pay Attention — And How to Think Deeply Again by Johann Hari
• Tired as F*ck: Burnout at the Hands of Diet , Self-Help , and Hustle Culture by Caroline Dooner 

Confused? It’s got to do with the way Amazon’s algorithms work, as Reedsy co-founder Ricardo Fayet explains in his free book How to Market a Book . 

“If your book is ‘indexed’ for a keyword, that means it will turn up as a result when a customer enters that term into the Amazon search bar. For example, more than nine thousand e-books are indexed on the Kindle Store for “herbal remedies.” [...] The closer the match between your title, or a part of your title, and the search keyword, the higher your book will rank.”

Looking for more marketing insights? You can download Ricardo’s book for free below:

It’s unlikely that you’re the first person to ever write about your topic, or even give advice about your topic. That’s okay — different people can give different, and still useful, advice on the same issues, so don’t feel like your idea is “taken.”

The important thing is to acknowledge those who have informed your research, clearly giving them credit for ideas they have contributed. By all means add to these or expand them, but, as many a disgruntled undergraduate can attest, you should never present them as your own: that’s intellectual property theft at worst  — and at best, very uncool.

Instead, be gracious: cite your sources, describe their positions if they differ from yours, and situate yourself as one of the many voices in this dialogue. Take Cal Newport as your example — his introduction of previous contributions on the subject of technology being distracting is a masterclass in sketching out an existing discussion and clarifying your place in it:

“[This idea] is not new. [Nicholas Carr’s] The Shallows was just the first in a series of recent books to examine the Internet’s effect on our brains and work habits. These subsequent titles include William Powers’s Hamlet’s BlackBerry , John Freeman’s The Tyranny of E-mail , and Alex Soojung-Kin Pang’s The Distraction Addiction —all of which agree, more or less, that network tools are distracting us from work that requires unbroken concentration, while simultaneously degrading our capacity to remain focused. Given this existing body of evidence, I will not spend more time in this book trying to establish this point.”   — Cal Newport, 'Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World '

Consider this a bonus step, particularly useful to those writers who hope to make a living from their writing careers . Supposing a reader has finished your book, you know that you have an interest in common with them — so there may be more they can learn from you.

If you’re active on social media, teach a video course, or offer further resources on similar topics freely available on your platform, mention this in your book. Even if you have none of these things at the moment, you can offer a simple and free resource that complements your book, like a printable checklist the reader can download for easy reference. The idea is that you’ll point the reader to your website , and offer them a “ reader magnet ,” in other words allow them to download something in exchange for them signing up to your mailing list… which you’ll need to set up if you don’t already have one!

Why bother with all this? Because, as Reedsy’s Ricardo Fayet asserts in his free Reedsy Learning course on mailing lists, “your author mailing list is the one main tool you’ll use to build a long-lasting relationship with your readers, turning them into repeat buyers and unconditional fans. Every sale you make while your mailing list is not in place is basically a lost opportunity.”

Free course: Author Mailing Lists

Acquire more readers, sell more books, and make more money with the only indispensable tool in the book marketer's arsenal. Get started now.

When written with care, self-help books can boost their writer’s career, turn seriously profitable , and actually help people improve their lives. It’s a win-win if ever there was one, so take the time to polish yours and you won’t regret it. Good luck!

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The 7 Best Self-Help Books to Change Your Life

Find yourself in one of these versatile, mind-changing reads

Mary K. Tatum is a licensed mental health counselor and psychotherapist and has worked in the field of psychology for over 15 years, with seven years in the private practice setting.

Amy Morin, LCSW, is a psychotherapist and international bestselling author. Her books, including "13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do," have been translated into more than 40 languages. Her TEDx talk,  "The Secret of Becoming Mentally Strong," is one of the most viewed talks of all time.

Emily is a board-certified science editor who has worked with top digital publishing brands like Voices for Biodiversity, Study.com, GoodTherapy, Vox, and Verywell.

Until proven otherwise, it’s safe to assume that—as the saying goes—nobody’s perfect. That means we have room for at least some improvement in our lives . And no, we’re not talking about getting a higher-paying job or a new haircut: we’re referring to inner improvement . This involves working on managing some of our less-than-desirable habits and traits—things like being unable to trust other people, having difficulties with interpersonal communication, or lacking self-confidence. 

That’s where self-help books can come in handy. It’s basically like someone has thought extensively about the general challenge you’re facing, and then walks you through steps to help you figure it out—or at least think about it more clearly. To be clear: self-help books are not a replacement for working with mental health professionals. If you’re dealing with a mental illness, seek out a credentialed person you can speak with in person (or over a video call). But for situations without a clinical element, a self-help book can make a difference.

To help you narrow down your options, here are the best self-help books according to the experts.

"A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life's Purpose" by Eckhart Tolle

Can be helpful to reivist certain passages, as needed

Discusses how to effectively process and find meaning in suffering

A lot of overlap with content found in the author's previous book

Many consider Eckhart Tolle one of the great thought leaders our time. Prior to " A New Earth ," Tolle wrote "The Power of Now," a best seller and must-read. The reason "A New Earth" makes this list is quite simple: it goes beyond teaching how to live in the moment and helps readers learn how to turn their suffering into peace. All types of suffering are addressed in the book, from anger and grief to jealousy and anxiety.

Tolle talks a lot about the ego and how to separate ourselves from it. His examples and recommended exercises are not just hocus pocus; they really work and are something anyone can do. Whether your suffering is rooted in jealousy, anger, grief, sadness, anxiety, or depression , Tolle will help you see life from varied perspectives, awakening you to your life’s purpose.

This book is great as a reference point, too. Those who pick up a copy will read it front to back then revisit Tolle's words over and over again. Others will keep it by their nightstands and flip to a chapter when they’re feeling some excess baggage creep in and could use some words of wisdom.

Price at time of publication: $18

"You Are a Badass" by Jen Sincero

Engaging exercises

Accessible writing style

Not the most empathetic towards people with depression

Contains some microaggressions and fat shaming

Far too often, fear gets the best of us. Jen Sincero helps readers go beyond that fear in her New York Times best seller " You Are a Badass ." What sets this self-help book apart from the others are the engaging end-of-chapter exercises.

Instead of casting the book aside and letting it collect dust after you read the last page, you'll be inspired to go back and reflect on the previous exercises you responded to. The exercises also drive home the points Sincero makes through her writing. When you feel a dip in your confidence, going back to your entries will put a positive spin on your day and remind you why you should show yourself more self-love . Also make sure to check out Sincero's follow-up book, "You Are a Badass at Making Money."

Price at time of publication: $8

Dr. Leela R. Magavi, MD, psychiatrist and regional medical director for Community Psychiatry.

Some self-help books include daily therapeutic activities and provide comfort and guidance to individuals who are suffering. I recommend individuals meet with a psychiatrist and therapist, and concurrently utilize self-help books to expedite their healing.

"The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens" by Sean Covey

Text is broken up using cartoons and quotes

Could be beneficial for both teens and parents

Updated in 2014, but still can feel outdated

Unnecessary references to dieting and losing weight

Many have read, or at least have heard about, "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People" by Stephen Covey. Covey's son Sean followed in his footsteps, making a spinoff version for teenagers that uses the same principles to help young adults master formative areas of their lives.

To make this self-help book age-appropriate and downright fun to read, Covey breaks up the text with cartoons, quotes, brainstorming ideas, and stories from real teens to bring the book together. " The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens " covers   topics like  body image , friendships, relationships, goal-setting, peer pressure, bullying, internet safety, and so much more. Gift this book to your teenage son, daughter, niece, nephew, or grandchild. It's the perfect keepsake to pass down to future generations of teens too.

"What Are You Hungry For?" by Deepak Chopra

Helps readers understand their reasons for certain types of eating

More than simply a guide to healthy eating

Even though it’s not a traditional weight loss book, that component being included at all might turn some people off

Can feel like any other book on weight loss and our relationship with food

Deepak Chopra is the self-help guru of our time, and any one of his books could be recommended for various reasons. " What Are You Hungry For? " will help you see your relationship with food in an entirely new light.

While this self-help book could be considered a guide to help with weight loss, it’s really so much more. Chopra does talk about losing weight and also gives a pretty regimented recommendation on what to eat. But he also digs deeper into the reasoning behind our desire to seek this transformation, and fulfillment is at the center of this argument.

Since change isn’t easy for most, the book offers a lot of intention-setting tips to help readers determine the motives behind their goals. Attaching an emotion to the things you want in life, health-related or otherwise, makes it easier to stay the course when the going gets tough.

Price at time of publication: $16

"Declutter Your Mind" by S.J. Scott

Tackles negative thinking patterns—something a lot of people struggle with

Includes helpful, actionable exercises

May not feel as applicable to people who aren’t self-employed

Writing can feel self-promotional at times

The subtitle of this book provides great insight into the heart of the book: How to stop worrying, relieve anxiety and eliminate negative thinking. " Declutter Your Mind " is a book that is very hands-on with its reader and full of various exercises to engage your mindset. You will learn the causes of mental clutter, how to change negative thoughts to positive ones, strategies to help with rocky relationships, how to identify what’s important to you, the importance of meditation, how to goal set, and much more.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed with stress, worry, or anxiety, this powerful book will do its part in offering various techniques, tips, and tricks to cope with an overactive mind. Reviewers consistently note how much they enjoy the actionable exercises in the book and that the co-authors offer more than a sermon on the importance of living mindfully and in the moment.

Price at time of publication: $15

"Big Magic: Create Living Beyond Fear" by Elizabeth Gilbert

Great for creative people (or those who want to be more creative)

Accessible and conversational writing style makes it easy to read

Gilbert’s “tough love” approach doesn't always translate

Reads more as a memoir than a self-help book in parts

For one reason or another, some were turned off by Elizabeth Gilbert’s best-selling "Eat Pray Love". But don’t let that turn you away from reading her other material, in particular, " Big Magic ". If you’re an artist or creator of any type and have struggled with a blockage that prevents you from pursuing your calling to its fullest, you’ll want to give this a read.

From creating new habits (and ridding yourself of old ones) to overcoming fear and surrounding yourself with like-minded individuals, Gilbert hits the nail on the head as she dissects the obstacles a creative person may face in pursuing their dreams. Her honest, conversational, no-BS tone will light a fire in your soul and help you be upfront with yourself about what you want from life. A highlight of this book is the usage of real-life examples from regular men and women across the country who have endured in their creative feats.

Price at time of publication: $21

"The Wisdom of Sundays" by Oprah Winfrey

Full of what Oprah Winfrey considers “life-changing insights”

It’s like sitting in on a conversation between Oprah and major thought leaders

Print can be small and hard to read at times

Oprah is the queen of interviewing spiritual gurus, world leaders, therapists, doctors, and other thought leaders. " The Wisdom of Sundays " takes the best-of-the-best from these conversations and combines them into one uplifting read.

The book has 240 pages full of snippets from what Oprah refers to as "life-changing insights". Authors in The Wisdom of Sundays include   Shonda Rimes, Cheryl Strayed, Tony Robbins, Thich Nhat Hahn, Wayne Dyer, and so many more. Take your time with each individual page to make sure you don't skim over any of the wonderful and thought-provoking insights inside.

Price at time of publication: $28

Final Verdict

This one’s tricky, because a self-help book that one person hated could be the one that changed another person’s life. Having said that, if you’re new to the genre, you probably want to stick with a book with a broader appeal, like "Declutter Your Mind" ( view on Amazon ). While not everyone is looking to mold a highly effective teen, everyone does have something that makes them anxious, and this book provides a manageable way of identifying and addressing some of the ones that are holding you back. 

What to Look for in a Self-Help Book

Selecting a self-help book is, for the most part, a highly personal decision (with the exception  being cases when a book is so popular you feel the need to read it, even if you wouldn’t have done so on your own). Given that this genre is not one-size-fits-all—and that people respond to a wide range of styles, topics, and tones—finding the right self-help books for yourself can be a process of trial and error. But, to help guide you through that process, here are a few general things to look for when purchasing a self-help book:

Writing style and tone:

First, think about what kind of book that is likely to be the most helpful in your current situation, as well as the kind you’d actually like to read. These two categories don’t necessarily overlap. For example, you may think you want a clinical-sounding, research-backed guide through a particular condition or situation, but in reality, would find it so boring that you’d never pick it up. And a self-help book just sitting on the shelf isn’t helping anyone.

If you think you’d respond well to something funny, or that it would help hold your interest, look for a self-help book that injects humor into its pages. (And yes, highly qualified experts with fancy degrees can also be hilarious.)

Something your therapist recommends:

If you are working with some type of therapist or counselor , ask them for recommendations for self-help books. Not only are they probably very familiar with this genre, but they also have gotten to know you during your sessions, and may have a good idea of the type of book that you’d benefit from the most.

In addition to tone, self-help books also come in several different formats. “Some individuals fare better with more structure and guidance, while others excel with more creative and fluid feedback,” Dr. Leela R. Magavi, MD , psychiatrist and regional medical director for Community Psychiatry explains. “Some people enjoy reading about concepts, while others prefer completing daily tasks and worksheets.”

Frequently Asked Questions

Like many things in life, what you get out of self-help books depends on the time and effort you put into not only reading them, but also doing the work. And no, that doesn’t necessarily include actual worksheets: the “work” also involves taking what you’ve read, sitting with it, processing it, and figuring out how you can use it in your own life (if applicable). 

“Self-help books can, in truth, be very helpful if an individual puts forth the effort to integrate the information learned from the book into their daily life,” Summer R. Thompson , DNP, PMHNP-BC, a mental health nurse practitioner at Community Psychiatry explains.

When someone finds the right self-help book and puts the time into reading it and doing the work, it can have a number of benefits. One is that they can “provide a concrete blueprint for an individual who has identified an issue in their life to navigate addressing it in a healthy manner on their own,” Thompson explains.   

In addition to providing a general blueprint for how a person can approach some of their biggest challenges, self-help books can add structure to individuals’ day-to-day life. “They can motivate individuals to try different strategies and venture into uncomfortable territory,” says Dr. Leela R. Magavi, MD , psychiatrist and regional medical director for Community Psychiatry .

Beyond that, Magavi notes that self-help books can lead to more fluid and healthy communication at work and at home, and many allow individuals to remain introspective and practice self-compassion. “It helps individuals identify ways in which they can respond to inevitable stress in a more positive way, and reiterates the fact that they have the power to write their own story and determine their own emotional experience,” she explains.

What the Experts Say

“Self-help books have helped many men and women initiate the often-daunting task of processing their thoughts and assessing their insecurities and weaknesses. Self-help books allow individuals to try different techniques and find what works the best for them to assuage anxiety and confront tumultuous times with grace.” — Dr. Leela R. Magavi, MD , psychiatrist and regional medical director for Community Psychiatry . 

“When looking at self-help books, it is important to look for books that provide clear and attainable goals in the context of the issue you are addressing. If a book makes recommendations that you do not feel are achievable in the context of your life, the book will likely not be very helpful to you and end up collecting dust rather than being an effective self-improvement tool.” — Summer R. Thompson , DNP, PMHNP-BC, mental health nurse practitioner at Community Psychiatry

Why Trust Verywell Mind?

Erinne Magee is a freelance writer covering health, wellness and lifestyle topics. Her work has appeared in The New York Times, The Washington Post, and more.

Additional reporting by Elizabeth Yuko

As a seasoned health writer and editor with a special focus on mental health and well-being, Elizabeth Yuko understands how powerful stress-relieving activities can be for many people—as well as the fact that they’re not one-size-fits-all. With decades of first-hand experience dealing with anxiety, depression, and post-traumatic stress disorder, she’s always on the lookout for new (and research-backed) products, techniques, and services that can help people cope with stress and other mental health challenges. 

By Mary K. Tatum, MS, LMHC Mary is a licensed mental health counselor and psychotherapist with 15 years of experience working in the psychology field. She earned a Bachelor of Science in psychology from Bluefield College and a Master of Science in Psychology from Palm Beach Atlantic University. She began in social work and then moved to drug rehab settings, working as a therapist, group facilitator, and clinical director. She specializes in family dynamic systems, trauma recovery, improving resilience, addiction recovery, and the psychology of successful business management.

101 Essays That Will Change The Way You Think

Brianna wiest.

450 pages, Kindle Edition

First published November 14, 2016

About the author

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"In a sense, the notion that thoughts create reality is more than just a nice idea; it’s also a fact of evolution. It was because of language and thought that we could create a world within our minds, and ultimately, it is because of language and thought that we have evolved into the society we have today—for better and for worse."

"The objectivity required to see the effects of present monoculture is very difficult to develop. Once you have so deeply accepted an idea as “truth” it doesn’t register as “cultural” or “subjective” anymore." "You think that to change your beliefs, you have to adopt a new line of thinking, rather than seek experiences that make that thinking self-evident. A belief is what you know to be true because experience has made it evident to you. If you want to change your life, change your beliefs. If you want to change your beliefs, go out and have experiences that make them real to you. Not the opposite way around" "You believe that creating your best life is a matter of deciding what you want and then going after it, but in reality, you are psychologically incapable1 of being able to predict what will make you happy. Your brain can only perceive what it’s known, so when you choose what you want for the future, you’re actually just recreating a solution or an ideal of the past. When things don’t work out the way you want them to, you think you’ve failed only because you didn’t re-create something you perceived as desirable. In reality, you likely created something better, but foreign, and your brain misinterpreted it as “bad” because of that. (Moral of the story: Living in the moment isn’t a lofty ideal reserved for the Zen and enlightened; it’s the only way to live a life that isn’t infiltrated with illusions. It’s the only thing your brain can actually comprehend."

"The most successful people in history—the ones many refer to as “geniuses” in their fields, masters of their crafts—had one thing in common, other than talent: Most adhered to rigid (and specific) routines...[T]he point is not what the routine consists of, but how steady and safe your subconscious mind is made through repetitive motions and expected outcomes."

What your big objective is. If you don’t know what you generally want to do with your precious, limited time here, you’re not going to do much of anything at all.

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Self-Discipline in Difficult Times: Pressing Ahead (or Not) When Your World Turns Upside Down (Self-Help Essays Book 1) Kindle Edition

• Book 1 of 1 Self-Help Essays
• Print length 34 pages
• Language English
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• Publication date May 7, 2020
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• ASIN ‏ : ‎ B088C2T6HS
• Publisher ‏ : ‎ Meadows Publishing (May 7, 2020)
• Publication date ‏ : ‎ May 7, 2020
• Language ‏ : ‎ English
• File size ‏ : ‎ 185 KB
• Simultaneous device usage ‏ : ‎ Unlimited
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• Sticky notes ‏ : ‎ On Kindle Scribe
• Print length ‏ : ‎ 34 pages
• #606 in Applied Psychology
• #636 in One-Hour Self-Help Short Reads
• #1,472 in Stress Management (Kindle Store)

About the author

Martin meadows.

Martin Meadows is a Wall Street Journal bestselling personal development author, writing about self-discipline and its transformative power to help you become successful and live a more fulfilling life. With a straight-to-the point approach, he's passionate about sharing tips, habits and resources for self-improvement through a combination of science-backed research and personal experience.

Embracing self-control helped Martin overcome extreme shyness, build successful businesses, learn multiple languages, become a bestselling author, and more. As a lifelong learner, he enjoys exploring the limits of his comfort zone through often extreme experiments and adventures involving various sports and wild or exotic places.

Martin uses a pen name. It helps him focus on serving the readers through writing, without the distractions of seeking recognition. He doesn’t believe in branding himself as an infallible expert (which he is not), opting instead to offer suggestions and solutions as a fellow personal growth experimenter, with all of the associated failures and successes.

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Out of the Ordinary

Like a dead man.

An Enlightened Age

The Classics

Love in the age of the pickup artist, death is not the end, most popular, against advice, it’s all over, wanting bad things, on being an arsehole.

Is Philosophy Self-Help?

In search of practical wisdom

In the past decade or so, there’s been a flowering of philosophical self-help—books authored by academics but intended to instruct us all. You can learn How to Be a Stoic , How to Be an Epicurean or How William James Can Save Your Life ; you can walk Aristotle’s Way and go Hiking with Nietzsche . As of 2020, Oxford University Press has issued a series of “Guides to the Good Life”: short, accessible volumes that draw practical wisdom from historical traditions in philosophy, with entries on existentialism, Buddhism, Epicureanism, Confucianism and Kant.

In the interest of full disclosure: I’ve planted seeds in this garden myself. In 2017, I published Midlife: A Philosophical Guide , and five years later, Life is Hard: How Philosophy Can Help Us Find Our Way . Both could be shelved without injustice in the self-help section. But both exhibit some discomfort with that fact. When I wrote Midlife , on the heels of a midlife crisis—philosophy, which I had loved, felt hollow and repetitive, a treadmill of classes to teach and papers to write, with tenure a gilded cage—I adopted the conventions of the self-help genre partly tongue-in-cheek. The midlife crisis invites self-mockery, and I was happy to oblige: there’s respite to be found in laughing at oneself. If my options were to quit my job, have an extramarital affair or write a navel-gazing book, my wife and I were glad that I had chosen option three. I hope the book helped others too—but it never really faced up to the problems of its project.

Asking a professor of moral philosophy for life advice can seem quixotic, like asking an expert on the mind-body problem to perform brain surgery. Philosophy is an abstract field of argument and theory: this is true as much of ethics as it is of metaphysics. Why should reflection in this vein—ruthless, complex, conceptual—make us happier, more well-adjusted people? (If you’ve spent time with philosophers, you may doubt that it has such salutary effects.) And why should philosophers want to join the self-help movement, anyway?

Historians often trace the origins of self-help to 1859, when the aptly monikered Samuel Smiles published Self-Help: With Illustrations of Character and Conduct , a practical guide to self-improvement that became an international blockbuster. (The term itself derives from earlier writing by Thomas Carlyle and Ralph Waldo Emerson.) 1 1. As Vladimir Trendafilov points out , Carlyle had used the phrase much earlier, in correspondence from 1822 and in fiction from 1831. According to Asa Briggs , Smiles took the phrase “self-help” from Emerson; but since Sartor Resartus was first published in America with a preface by Emerson in 1836, it is possible that Emerson took the phrase from Carlyle. Vladimir Trendafilov tracks Smiles’s use of the phrase instead to an unsigned editorial in the Leeds Times in 1836, written by Robert Nicoll: “Heaven helps those who help themselves, and self-help is the only effectual help.” Smiles inspired readers across the globe, from Nigeria to Japan. And he inspired imitators—thousands of them. Between his time and ours, self-help has grown into a multibillion-dollar industry.

Smiles was a social reformer, but his book tells people that reform begins at home: self-transformation is, he promises, a sure path to success. The fantasy of self-reliance is a hallmark of the genre—and a focus of political critique. According to the literary critic Beth Blum , “self-help is widely understood as a technology of neoliberal self-governance used to discipline citizens and manage populations”: the social function of self-help is to obfuscate injustice, directing us to work not on society but ourselves. As if that wasn’t bad enough, self-help provokes eye-rolling cynicism. It has become “synonymous with sentimentality, idiocy, and hucksterism”—and this from one of its foremost advocates, the bestselling Alain de Botton. According to its detractors, self-help is glib, politically obtuse and intellectually dishonest: embarrassing, if not shameful. Philosophy is better off without it.

What, then, should we make of the philosophers who write self-help books? Are they bowing to market forces, dumbing down ideas to cash in on a credulous readership? Or returning to a calling they should never have renounced, “a region that from time immemorial was regarded as the true field of philosophy”—in the words of Theodor Adorno, no admirer of dumbing down or cashing in—“but which … has lapsed into intellectual neglect, sententious whimsy and finally oblivion: the teaching of the good life”?

If self-help as a distinctive genre is an invention of the Victorian era, thinking and writing aimed at better living is not. In this broader sense, self-help was entwined with philosophy at the birth of the Western tradition. In Plato’s Republic , “the argument concerns no ordinary topic but the way we ought to live”; and in the Apology , Socrates definitively states: “the unexamined life is not worth living.” Philosophy is not just a guide to life; it’s an essential part of living well.

By philosophy, Socrates meant ethics, the systematic study of that extraordinary topic, how to live. Like Diogenes the Cynic, his descendant, he disdained the metaphysical speculations of the pre-Socratic philosophers, who argued that all is flux, or that all is one, or that all is water. But Socrates’s more dominant descendants, Plato and Aristotle, disagreed : they argued that philosophy as a whole, including its more esoteric parts—like metaphysics—lies at the heart of the best human life. This idea was common ground among the Hellenistic schools, the Stoics, Skeptics and Epicureans who shaped philosophy in ancient Rome. 2 2. For a fuller discussion, to which I am indebted, see John Cooper, Pursuits of Wisdom: Six Ways of Life in Ancient Philosophy (2012). They promised a life of tranquility to those who grasp reality as it is.

When contemporary writers treat ancient philosophy as self-help, they tend to minimize its metaphysical presumptions. But the Stoic injunction to let go of what is out of your control—“If you kiss your child or your wife, say to yourself that it is a human being that you’re kissing; and then, if one of them should die, you won’t be upset”— tends to ring hollow without a Stoic faith in providence. And it’s distorting when contemporary readers, like the psychologist Jonathan Haidt, extract from Aristotle a pedestrian vision of the good life as “one where you develop your strengths, realize your potential, and become what it is in your nature to become.” For Aristotle, the nature you should perfect is not your individual potential, but an objective human nature whose ideal expression lies in theoretical contemplation of the cosmos.

I’m not here to make a case for the revival of metaphysics as self-help. Nor do I agree with Socrates. Like Iris Murdoch, I believe that “an unexamined life can be virtuous.” But Murdoch was surely right that the question “How can we make ourselves better?” is one “that moral philosophers should attempt to answer.”

This thought persists through the ups and downs of the Western tradition into the early modern period—at which point it falters. It’s unfair to blame a single thinker for the fractures that began to surface then. But David Hume is representative. Bringing the methods of Newtonian natural science to “moral subjects,” Hume compared himself to an “anatomist” who seeks the “most secret Springs & Principles” of mind and body. His Treatise of Human Nature ends with a cautionary note: “The anatomist ought never to emulate the painter; nor in his accurate dissections and portraitures of the smaller parts of the human body, pretend to give his figures any graceful and engaging attitude or expression.” According to this dictum, a moral philosopher is not a moralist who guides us to virtue but a scientist who dissects what virtue is. The work of the anatomist may or may not help the painter, but there’s a clear division of labor. To anatomize is not to paint, and philosophy is not self-help.

Hume’s distinction has shaped the self-conception of subsequent moral philosophers. They may frame principles for living better lives, but it’s not their job to pitch advice for self-improvement of the sort one finds in Samuel Smiles. If these projects are connected, the connection is frayed, like a rope bridge across a ravine. Safer to stay on your own side, building theories of morality indifferent to applicable self-help—or self-help spaces unencumbered by philosophy. With rare exceptions—like the Autobiography of John Stuart Mill, which philosophized his nervous breakdown—the moral theory of the nineteenth and twentieth centuries does not look much like contemporary self-help. Its field is the construction and demolition of abstract arguments, addressed to ever more intricate questions, not the directive wisdom of the sage.

If philosophers hope to span this gulf, they will need a blueprint, or at least a sketch, of the bridge between theory and practice, an inkling of the flaw in Hume’s analogy. How can philosophy as it now exists—a discipline of argument, analysis and abstract principle—make us into better people, living better lives?

I’m not alone in asking this question or in being struck by the recent bloom of philosophical self-help. A mark of its professional recognition is the publication of an essay by Meghan Sullivan in the flagship journal, Ethics, that treats the Oxford Guides to the Good Life as specimens of a type. Sullivan calls this type “applied tradition”:

In applied tradition the focal questions concern how a person can embrace a comprehensive life goal, like enlightenment (Buddhists), sagehood (Confucians), freedom (Kantians), authenticity (existentialists), or flourishing (Aristotelians). Like applied ethics, applied tradition has its characteristic method: the philosopher takes a question where there are moral and practical stakes particularly with respect to the life goal, identifies ideas and practices within a tradition that might answer the question, and then develops a plan for implementing those ideas and practices within the seeker’s life.

This is one way to think about philosophy as self-help: it recruits a given tradition and makes it newly relevant. Go back to a time when philosophy functioned as self-help and recreate it in the present. If a tradition was therapeutic once before, why not again?

Yet as a writer of philosophical self-help, I’ve never thought of what I was doing in these terms. I don’t just mean that I’m more eclectic, dispensing “doses of Schopenhauer, Wittgenstein, Aristotle, and others,” to quote Sullivan’s description of my work. I mean that I am trying to get things right. When I engage with Aristotle, say, I’m as much concerned with his mistakes—an obsession with the ideal life, a meritocracy of friendship—as with his ethical insights.

If philosophy has authority, it’s the authority of truth, not tradition. Of the authors of the Oxford Guides, Sullivan writes: “These philosophers see themselves more as generating material that might fruitfully guide those drawn to the traditions than as adjudicating between the traditions.” But philosophy must judge. I don’t see how to reconcile its alethic self-image with a view on which one simply picks a goal—enlightenment, sagehood, freedom, authenticity or flourishing—and taps philosophy (and psychology) for the means. We have to know what the goal should be.

The picture I’m opposing is explicit in a recent book that is otherwise very good, How to Live a Good Life: A Guide to Choosing Your Personal Philosophy , edited by three philosophers: Massimo Pigliucci, Skye Cleary and Daniel Kaufman. The book has fifteen chapters, retailing “philosophies of life” from Buddhism, Confucianism and Daoism through Aristotle, Epicurus and the Stoics to the monotheistic religions, Ethical Culture, existentialism, pragmatism, Effective Altruism and secular humanism. Each thinker was invited to “reflect publicly on their choice of philosophy of life, explaining … why it works for them.” The options are offered up for our selection, like suits to purchase off the rack.

There is little acknowledgment that a central element of most every outlook in the book is that it alone is true and every other outlook false. What we get in place of argument is appeal to personal style. “What Buddhism might offer,” Owen Flanagan writes in the first chapter, “is a relatively stable sense of serenity and contentment, not the sort of feeling state that is widely sought and promoted in the West as the best kind of happiness.” Hiram Crespo became an Epicurean “after realizing that the Epicurean philosophy was the most satisfying for me,” not through being convinced that it was true. And in embracing Ethical Culture, Anne Klaeysen made “a deeply personal decision to attribute worth and dignity to every human being.”

In a passage that would shock Aristotle, Daniel Kaufman, whose “preferred philosophy of life [is] Aristotelianism,” buys wholesale the metaphor of clothes: “It is not enough, then, that one admire a philosophy for its intellectual qualities. It must be well suited to the type of person one is and the type of life one leads, an ill-fitting philosophy being even more obvious and awkward and ultimately useless than an ill-fitting suit.” But Aristotle believed that his philosophy was true —one size fits all—not a good look for some that others need not sport.

This sharpens the problem implicit in Hume’s distinction. If we are in pursuit of truth, not expressing our taste, if we take a critical stance toward consoling traditions, what assurance do we have that philosophy will help, not harm? In his madly egocentric autobiography, Ecce Homo , Nietzsche wrote: “my truth is terrible.” For all we know, philosophy will drive us to despair.

When I was writing Midlife in the early 2010s, I didn’t have an answer to these problems. As it happened, thinking through regret and the relentless grind of things to do did give rise to insights that afforded consolation. (For instance, that missing out in middle age is the inevitable side effect of something good: the wild excess of things worth wanting, too many to contain within a single life.) But if you’d asked me why philosophy assuaged my midlife crisis, I could only say that I got lucky.

I think I have the rudiments of a theory now, though: a vision of philosophy as self-help that turns on reconceiving both. It begins by distinguishing happiness—a subjective state of mind—from the activity of living well. Imagine someone submerged in sustaining fluid, electrodes plugged into their brain, being fed each day a stream of consciousness that simulates an ideal life. Unaware that it’s unreal, they’re wildly happy. But their life does not go well. They don’t do most of what they think they’re doing or know most of what they think they know, and they don’t interact with anyone or anything but the machine. You wouldn’t wish it on someone you love: to be imprisoned in a vat, alone forever, duped.

If it aimed at nothing more than happiness, self-help would be a soulless enterprise. But it needn’t take that form. The idea of “living well” that animates the philosophical tradition—the aim of philosophical self-help—is to treat oneself and others as one should. It’s a platitude that we should try to live that way, but as Iris Murdoch argued in The Sovereignty of Good , we can do so only through the hard-won truth. We live within the world we see, “in the moral sense of ‘see’ [that calls for] moral imagination and moral effort.”

The vision intrinsic to living well need not rest on elaborate reasoning or systematic theory of the sort philosophers flaunt. It aims at an abundant honesty about one’s circumstance, about oneself and others. It is knowledge of this kind that tells us how to feel and what to do. But the difference between vision and philosophy is overblown. For Murdoch, attention turns on refining our concepts, portraying people as they are, while her philosophy interrogates the concepts that articulate our social world. To think about thinking of others in terms of attention, not “impersonal quasi-scientific knowledge of the ordinary world” but “a refined and honest perception of what is really the case,” is to see ourselves differently.

Moral philosophy often works this way: the role of argument is not to compel assent—it almost never does—but to build conceptual schemes and through connection create new meaning. It’s what I’m doing now: sketching the relationship between moral philosophy, truth and argument in a way that makes room for philosophical self-help. It’s what Murdoch is doing when she identifies love with “the perception of individuals”: shifting our conceptions of attention, knowledge and love.

The stickiest ideas in philosophical self-help are not proofs but concepts or distinctions. Take the cliché “living in the present,” which calls to mind the German spiritual guru Eckhart Tolle, for whom “time is an illusion.” “In the Now, in the absence of time,” he counsels, “all your problems dissolve.” Despite the hyperbole, there’s something right in the idea that we should give “more attention to the doing than to the result [we] want to achieve through it.” Philosophy can make sense of this , contrasting “telic” activities, which aim at terminal ends—like earning a promotion, having a child or writing a book—with activities that are “atelic.” Philosophizing, parenting, spending time with friends: you can stop doing these things, but you can’t complete them, leaving nothing more to do. With telic activities, fulfillment is deferred to the future then archived in the past, so that the present feels empty—but atelic activities are fully realized in the Now. To live in the present is to cherish the value of the atelic, so easily neglected in our project-driven lives.

What philosophy gives us here is a conceptual lens: a capacity for self-audit that comes from asking what we value and what kind of value it has. It’s the redescription of life that is ethically orienting. Perhaps surprisingly, this way of thinking speaks to the political critique of self-help. Murdoch borrowed the concept of attention and its relation to love from the French philosopher and mystic Simone Weil; but while Murdoch was philosophically apolitical, Weil was not. For Weil, refining the concepts with which to frame our social circumstance was a politically urgent task. As World War II loomed over Europe, she would write: “To clarify thought, to discredit the intrinsically meaningless words, and to define the use of others by precise analysis—to do this, strange though it may appear, might be a way of saving human lives.”

Philosophy seeds new concepts, novel understandings—as it might be, alienation, ideology, structural injustice; new ways of comprehending freedom, status, power. Philosophical argument serves more to nurture these concepts and give them life than to establish theorems critics can’t dispute. In Murdoch’s words, “the task of moral philosophers [is] to extend, as poets may extend, the limits of language, and enable it to illuminate regions which were formerly dark.”

The most profound achievements of moral and political philosophy lie not in abstract theory or geometric proof but in finding words by which to light our way to lives well-lived. If that is not self-help, what is?

If you liked this essay, you’ll love reading The Point in print.

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Learning to be happier

In order to help improve my students’ mental health, i offered a course on the science of happiness. it worked – but why.

by Bruce Hood   + BIO

In 2018, a tragic period enveloped the University of Bristol, when several students committed suicide related to work stress. Suicide is usually the ultimate culmination of a crisis in mental health, but these students weren’t alone in feeling extreme pressure: across the campus there was a pervasive sense that the general student body was not coping with the demands of higher education. My own tutee students, whom I met on a regular basis, were reporting poor mental health or asking for extensions because they were unable to meet deadlines that were stressing them out. They were overly obsessed with marks and other performance outcomes, and this impacted not only on them, but also on the teaching and support staff who were increasingly dealing with alleviating student anxiety. Students wanted more support that most felt was lacking and, in an effort to deal with the issue, the university had invested heavily, making more provision for mental health services. The problem with this strategy, however, is that by the time someone seeks out professional services, they are already at a crisis point. I felt compelled to do something.

At the time, Bristol University was described in the British press as a ‘toxic’ environment, but this was an unfair label as every higher education institution was, and still is, experiencing a similar mental health crisis. Even in the Ivy League universities in the United States, there was a problem, as I discovered when I became aware of a course on positive psychology that had become the most popular at Yale in the spring of 2018. On reading about the course, I was somewhat sceptical that simple interventions could make much difference until I learned that Yale’s ‘Psychology and the Good Life’ course was being delivered by a colleague of mine, Laurie Santos, who I knew would not associate herself with anything flaky.

That autumn term of 2018, I decided to try delivering a free lunchtime series of lectures, ‘The Science of Happiness’, based on the Yale course. Even though this pilot was not credit-bearing, more than 500 students gave up their Wednesday lunchtimes to attend. That was unusual as, in my experience, students rarely give up time or expend effort to undertake activities unless they are awarded credit or incentives. There would be 10 lectures, and everyone was requested to fill in self-report questionnaires assessing various mental health dimensions both before and after the course, to determine whether there had been any impact and, if so, how much.

The Science of Happiness had clearly piqued interest as indicated by the audience size, but I was still nervous. This was not my area of academic expertise and there was heightened sensitivity following the media attention over recent tragic events on campus. What were the students’ expectations? Talking about mental health seemed hazardous. Would I trigger adverse reactions simply by discussing these issues?

D espite my initial reservations, the final feedback after the course ended was overwhelmingly positive. That was gratifying but, as a scientist, I like hard evidence. What would the questionnaires tell us? The analysis of the before and after scores revealed that there had been a 10-15 per cent positive increase in mental wellbeing across the different measures of wellbeing, anxiety and loneliness. That may not sound much but it was the average, and a significant impact in the field of interventions. Who wouldn’t want to be 15 per cent happier, healthier or wealthier? I was no longer a sceptic; I was a convert. I would stop focusing on developmental psychology, my own area of research, and concentrate on making students happier. Even a 15 per cent improvement might lead to a degree of prevention that was better than dealing with a student who was already struggling.

The following year, we launched a credit-bearing course for first-year students who had room in their curriculum schedule to take an open unit, which has now been running for five years. These psychoeducational courses are not new and predate my efforts by at least a decade. But what makes the Bristol psychoeducational course unique (and I believe this is still the case) is that we persuaded the university to allow a credit-bearing course that had no graded examinations but was accredited based on engagement alone. Not only was I convinced by compelling arguments for why graded assessment is the wrong way to educate, but it would have been hypocritical of me to lecture about the failings of an education system based solely on assessment, and then give students an exam to determine if they had engaged. Rather, engagement required regular weekly attendance, meeting in peer-mentored small groups, but also undertaking positive psychology exercises and journaling about their experiences so that we could track progress. Again, to test the impact of the course, students were asked to fill in the various psychometric questionnaires to give us an insight to impact.

Meditation stops you thinking negative thoughts. Not exactly a scientific explanation

We now have five years’ worth of data and have published peer-reviewed scientific papers on evaluation of the course. As with the initial pilot, the consistent finding is that there is, on average, a 10-15 per cent significant increase in positive mental wellbeing over the duration of the course. The course improves mental wellbeing but there are limitations. Our most recent analysis over the longer term shows that the positive benefits we generate during the course, and the two months after, are lost within a year, returning to previous baseline scores, unless the students maintain some of the recommended activities. However, in those students who kept practising at least one of the positive psychology interventions (PPIs) such as journaling, meditation, exercise, expressing gratitude or any of the other evidence-based activities, they maintained their benefits up to two years later.

Why do interventions work and why do they stop working? As to the first question, there are countless self-help books promoting PPIs, but the level of explanation is either missing or tends to be circular. Acts of kindness work because they make you feel better. Meditation calms the mind and stops you thinking negative thoughts. Not exactly a scientific explanation or revelation. Even though I had largely put my experimental work with children on hold because of the demands of teaching such a large course, I was still intellectually intrigued by the same basic theoretical question that has always motivated my research. What is the mechanism underlying positive psychology?

T here are several plausible hypotheses out there from established academics in the field that explain some of the activities, but they lack a unifying thread that I thought must be operating across the board. I started considering the wide and diverse range of PPIs to see if there was any discernible pattern that might suggest underlying mechanisms. Two years ago, I had an insight and I think the answer can be found in the way we focus on our self.

In my role as a developmental psychologist, I see change and continuity everywhere in relation to human thought and behaviour. For some time, I have been fascinated by the concept of the self and how it emerges but must change over the course of a lifetime. I believe earlier childhood notions lay the foundation for later cognition which is why development is so critical to understanding adults. My most recent work concentrated on how ownership and possessions play major roles in our concept of self, and I was particularly interested in acts of sharing among children. Specifically, we had completed a set of studies demonstrating that, when children are instructed to talk about themselves, they thought about their own possessions differently and became less willing to share with others. Emphasising their self had made these children more selfish. This got me thinking about the role of self-focus in happiness.

The most pernicious aspect of self-focus is the tendency to keep comparing ourselves to others

Infants start off with an egocentric view of the world – a term and concept introduced by the psychologist Jean Piaget. Egocentric individuals tend to perceive the world from their own perspective, and many studies have shown that young children are egocentric in the way they see the world, act, talk, think and behave with others. Normal development requires adopting a more allocentric – or other-based perspective in order to be accepted. The sense of self changes from early ebullient egocentrism to an increasing awareness of one’s relative position in the social order. Children may become more other-focused but that also includes unfavourable comparisons. They increasingly become self-aware and concerned about what others think about them – a concern that transitions into a preoccupation when they enter adolescence that never really goes away. As for adults, like many features of the human mind, earlier ways of thinking are never entirely abandoned. This is why our self-focus can become a ‘curse’, as the psychologist Mark Leary describes , feeding the inner critic who is constantly negatively evaluating our position in life.

One reason that self-focus can become a curse is that we are ignorant of the biases our brains operate with that lead us to make wrong decisions and comparisons. When it comes to happy choices, we want something because we think it will make us happy, but our predictions are inaccurate. We think events will be more impactful than they turn out to be, and we fail to appreciate how fast we get used to things, both good and bad. This is called a failure of affective forecasting which is why the psychologist Dan Gilbert explains that our tendency to ‘stumble on happiness’ is because our emotional predictions are so way off. We don’t take into consideration how future circumstances will differ because we focus on just one element and we also forget how quickly we adapt to even the most pleasurable experiences. But the most pernicious aspect of self-focus is the tendency to keep comparing ourselves to others who seem to be leading happier lives. Social media is full of images of delicious plates of food, celebrity friends, exotic holidays, luxurious products, amazing parties and just about anything that qualifies as worthy of posting to bolster one’s status. Is it any wonder that the individuals who are the most prone to social comparison are the ones who feel the worst after viewing social media? As Gore Vidal once quipped: ‘Every time a friend succeeds, I die a little.’

If egocentric self-focus is problematic then maybe positive psychology works by altering our perspective to one that is more allocentric or ‘other-focused’? To do so is challenging because it is not easy to step out of ourselves under normal circumstances. Our stream of conscious awareness is from the first-person, or egocentric, perspective and, indeed, it is nigh-on-impossible to imagine an alternative version because our sensory systems, thought processes and representation of our selves are coded as such to enable us to interact within the world as coherent entities.

M any PPIs such as sharing, acts of kindness, gratitude letters or volunteering are clearly directed towards enriching the lives of others, but how can we explain the benefits of solitary practices where the self seems to be the focus of attention? The explanation lies with the self-representation circuitry in the brain known as the default mode network (DMN). One of the surprising discoveries from the early days of brain imaging is that, when we are not task-focused, rather than becoming inactive, the brain’s DMN goes into overdrive. Mind-wandering is commonly reported during bouts of DMN activity and, although that may be associated with positive daydreaming, we are also ruminating about unresolved problems that continue to concern us. According to one influential study that contacted people at random points of the day to ask them about what they were doing, what they were thinking and how they were feeling, people were more likely to be unhappy when their minds were wandering, which was about half of the waking day. Probably because they were focusing on their own predicaments.

If you focus on your problems, this can become difficult to control. There’s no point trying to stop yourself ruminating because the very act of trying not to think about a problem increases the likelihood that this becomes the very thought that occupies your mind. This was first described in an 1863 essay by Fyodor Dostoyevsky, when he observed the effect of trying not to think; he wrote: ‘Try to pose for yourself this task: not to think of a polar bear, and you will see that the cursed thing will come to mind every minute.’ My late colleague Dan Wegner would go on to study this phenomenon called ironic thought suppression , which he explained resulted from two mechanisms: the tendency to increase the strength of the representation of a thought by the act of trying to suppress it, and a corresponding increased vigilance to monitor when the thought comes to the fore in consciousness. Ironic thought suppression is one reason why it can be so difficult to fall asleep. This is why one of our recommended activities on our Science of Happiness course is to journal on a regular basis because this helps to process information in a much more controlled and objective way, rather than succumbing to the torment of automatic thinking.

Could the long-term benefits be something to do with altering the ego?

Other recommended activities that calibrate the level of self-focus also attenuate DMN activity. For example, mindfulness meditation advocates not trying to suppress spontaneous thoughts but rather deliberately turning attention to bodily sensations or external sounds. In this way, the spotlight of attention is directed away from the internal dialogue one is having with oneself. It is during such states that brain imaging studies reveal that various solitary interventions we recommend on the course – such as meditation or taking a walk in the country – are associated with lowered DMN activity and, correspondingly, less negative rumination. This is why achieving absorption or full immersion during optimal states of flow draws conscious awareness and attention out of egocentric preoccupation. To achieve states of flow, we recommend that students engage in activities that require a challenge that exceeds their skill level to an extent that they rise to the task, but do not feel overwhelmed by it. When individuals achieve flow states, their sense of self, and indeed time itself, appears to evaporate.

There are other more controversial ways to alter the egocentric self into one that is more allocentric. Currently, there is a growth in the use of psychedelics as a treatment for intractable depression and, so far, the initial findings from this emerging field are highly encouraging. One clinical study has shown that psychedelic-assisted therapy produced significant improvement in nearly three-quarters of patients who previously did not respond to conventional antidepressants. The primary mechanism of action of psychedelics is upon serotonin (5-HT 2A ) receptors within the DMN which, in turn, produce profound alterations of consciousness, including modulations in the sense of self, sensory perception and emotion. Could the long-term benefits be something to do with altering the ego? One of the most common reports from those who have undergone psychedelic-assisted therapy, aside from euphoria and vivid hallucinations, is a lasting, profound sense of connection to other people, the environment, nature and the cosmos. Across a variety of psychedelics, the sense of self becomes more interconnected, which is why a recent review concluded that there was consistent acute disruption in the resting state of the DMN.

I f chemically induced states of altered consciousness through psychedelics (which is currently still illegal in most places) is not your thing, then there are other ways to redress the balance between egocentrism and allocentrism. Engaging in group activities that generate synchronicity – such as rituals, dancing or singing in choirs – alter the sense of self and increase connection with others. But if group activities or psychedelic trips don’t work for you, then take a rocket trip. One of the most moving emotional and lasting experiences, known as ‘ the overview effect ’, occurs to those lucky individuals given the opportunity to view our planet from outer space. As the astronaut Edgar Mitchell described it, it creates an ‘explosion of awareness’ and an ‘overwhelming sense of oneness and connectedness … accompanied by an ecstasy … an epiphany.’

Back down on Earth, we can be happier when we simply acknowledge that we are all mortal, interconnected individuals who suffer personal losses and tragedies. No one’s life is perfect, and indeed you need to experience unhappiness in order recognise when things are going well. As the Stoic philosopher Epictetus put it: ‘Men are disturbed not by things, but by the views which they take of things.’ In other words, it’s not what happens to you, but how you respond, that matters, and that’s where positive psychology can make a difference – but only if you keep reminding yourself to get out of your own head.

Happiness hack

How to shift your egocentric self to one that is more allocentric using language

Consider a problem that is currently bothering you. A real problem – not a hypothetical one or a world problem beyond your control. Find something that makes you unhappy and then say to yourself: ‘I am worried about [whatever it is] because [whatever the reason may be] and this makes me upset.’ Now repeat the exercise but this time don’t use egocentric or first-person terms such as ‘I’ or ‘me’. Rather use your name and non-first-person language such as: ‘Bruce is worried about his [whatever it is] problem and this makes him upset.’

Speaking in non-first-person language should automatically transpose you out of the egocentric perspective to one that is other or allocentric, making the problem seem less.

Design and fashion

Sitting on the art

Given its intimacy with the body and deep play on form and function, furniture is a ripely ambiguous artform of its own

Emma Crichton Miller

Consciousness and altered states

How perforated squares of trippy blotter paper allowed outlaw chemists and wizard-alchemists to dose the world with LSD

Last hours of an organ donor

In the liminal time when the brain is dead but organs are kept alive, there is an urgent tenderness to medical care

Ronald W Dworkin

Stories and literature

Do liberal arts liberate?

In Jack London’s novel, Martin Eden personifies debates still raging over the role and purpose of education in American life

History of ideas

Reimagining balance

In the Middle Ages, a new sense of balance fundamentally altered our understanding of nature and society

What would Thucydides say?

In constantly reaching for past parallels to explain our peculiar times we miss the real lessons of the master historian

Mark Fisher

17 Best Self-Help Authors To Help You Make Positive Changes

Find out the best self-help authors to guide you with your personal growth and development. Learn more in this article.

Self-improvement is a never-ending journey, and people worldwide agree that these best-selling self-help books can help you learn to live your best life, one good decision at a time. 

Self-help books have helped many people change their lives for the better, and it’s easier than ever to get your hands on reading material that can help you grow and change. Whether you choose to hit up Amazon or your local library, the authors below are known among businesspeople, entrepreneurs, and everyday people who want to improve their lives by writing the best self-help books. 

1. Dale Carnegie

2. brené brown, 3. jen sincero, 4. stephen r. covey, 5. eckhart tolle, 6. elizabeth gilbert, 7. james clear, 8. marie kondo, 9. mark manson, 10. napoleon hill, 11. tony robbins, 12. david schwartz, 13. paulo coelho, 14. don miguel ruiz, 15. robert kiyosaki, 16. viktor frankl, 17. rhonda byrne, the final world on best self-help authors, what are the best books for self-help on the market today, who is the wealthiest self-help author, best authors reading list.

Dale Carnegie’s  self-improvement books have helped extroverts and introverts alike learn how to make friends and live happier lives. How to Stop Worrying and Start Living helps people living with anxiety and worry. His book on honing one’s social skills, How to Win Friends and Influence People , has sold over 30 million copies. Carnegie is heralded as one of the best self-help authors of all time.

• Brand: GENERAL PRESS
• Language: english
• Hardcover Book
• Carnegie, Dale (Author)
• English (Publication Language)

With over four million copies of her books sold worldwide, social scientist  Brené Brown  is in high demand. Her studies on relationships, vulnerability, and shame have helped people dig into past hurts and how they affect their relationships today. In addition to steadily churning out books that top the charts, Brown is also a regular guest on podcasts and talk shows alike. Brown’s latest book, Atlas of the Heart , is expected to follow sales trends of her previous bestsellers, including Daring Greatly and Dare to Lead . 

• Brown, Brené (Author)
• 336 Pages - 11/30/2021 (Publication Date) - Random House (Publisher)

Successful people worldwide know  Jen Sincero  for her You Are a Badass series, which has sold more than five million copies. In 2011, Sincero sold most of her belongings and embarked on a journey of self-discovery, running her book proposal writing business from all corners of the globe. In addition to writing motivational books, Sincero also performs motivational comedy, captivating audiences with her kick-in-the-pants style of pushing people to move forward. 

• Jen Sincero (Author)
• 01/01/2021 (Publication Date) - John Murray Learning (Publisher)

Heralded as one of the best self-help books of all time, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey has sold more than 20 million copies. Published in 1989, 7 Habits has stood the test of time and continues to be a favorite among high achievers across various sectors. Covey completed an analysis of self-help books during his doctoral dissertation and found a hole in the market that he could fill. So he developed 7 Habits as a secular extension of his faith, helping people use relational skills that worked no matter their beliefs.

• Covey, Stephen R. (Author)
• 464 Pages - 05/19/2020 (Publication Date) - Simon & Schuster (Publisher)

Embracing the power of positive thinking has undoubtedly worked for self-help author  Eckhart Tolle  — he’s sold more than 2 million copies of The Power of Now , his self-help guide to help readers learn to live in the present moment. Born in post-war Germany, Tolle experienced periods of deep depression that later inspired him to develop his world-renowned self-help techniques. In 2008, the author partnered with Oprah Winfrey to host a webinar series, exposing millions of people to his teachings on appreciating the stillness and embracing life at the moment. 

• Eckhart Tolle (Author)
• Yogi Immpressions (IBD) (Publisher)

Known for her self-love manifesto,  Elizabeth Gilbert’s 2006 Eat, Pray, Love tale of travel and personal discovery captivated book lovers and movie buffs alike. The memoir was made into a hit film starring Julia Roberts in 2010. To date, the bestseller has found its way into the hands of more than 10 million readers worldwide. Gilbert grew up in Connecticut and went to college in New York City. Post-college, she spent time traveling to gain experiences that she could use for her writing. Her divorce sparked the globe-trotting journey that she shared with Eat, Pray, Love readers. 

• Great product!
• Gilbert, Elizabeth (Author)
• 400 Pages - 01/30/2007 (Publication Date) - Riverhead Books (Publisher)

With over 5 million copies sold to date,  James Clear’s Atomic Habits is at the top of the book list for self-improvement gurus worldwide. A freak baseball accident that caused brain damage caused Clear to take a serious look at his life — and move things in a different direction. Throughout his recovery, he began to realize how small, consistent habits could make a significant difference in one’s life and chose to share his experience with others in his books. James works to help his readers understand that solid systems are far more effective than goal-setting when it comes to long-term accomplishments. 

Are you interested in building a solid system for your content creation business? Check out our post on building a solid editorial calendar . 

• Clear, James (Author)
• 320 Pages - 10/16/2018 (Publication Date) - Avery (Publisher)

Marie Kondo’s three-book series on how decluttering can lead to a more fulfilling life has sold more than 4 million copies in the United States alone. Kondo states that she has spent more than half of her life thinking about ways to tidy and organize, and 2010’s The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up is proof of her dedication to her craft.

By her mid-20s, Kondo’s self-made organizing business had a hefty waitlist. Kondo’s method — dubbed the KonMari method, a nod to the Japanese-style version of her name — invites people to choose to keep belongings that serve a purpose or spark joy and to respectfully discard items that no longer serve them. 

• Kondo, Marie (Author)
• 10/15/2019 (Publication Date) - Ten Speed Press (Publisher)

Mark Manson’s self-help books have sold more than 14 million copies globally. His no-nonsense style is evident in his books, Life Advice That Doesn’t Suck and The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck . Manson encourages people to subscribe to the less is more philosophy, encouraging them to focus on fewer tasks and people. In paying attention to fewer tasks, Manson encourages people to ensure that the tasks they focus on are done with excellence. In focusing on fewer people, Manson encourages his audiences to work to bolster the relationships that matter most. 

• Mark Manson (Author)
• Generic (Publisher)

Napoleon Hill’s 1937 smash success Think and Grow Rich taught people how to make money — the book has sold more than 30 million copies to date. Born in 1883, Hill helped his audience understand the importance of having — and working to fulfill — high expectations in life. In addition, Hill was the first self-help guru to introduce the concept of mastermind groups, in which executives and entrepreneurs with similar interests get together outside of their typical work environment to meet and swap ideas. 

• Think and Grow Rich
• Hill, Napoleon (Author)
• 378 Pages - 10/16/2008 (Publication Date) - TarcherPerigee (Publisher)

Known for his powerful personal development seminars,  Tony Robbins  is also rocking the self-help book market, with more than 15 million copies of Awaken the Giant Within  sold around the world. Robbins had a tough start to life, as he lived with abuse at home and developed a pituitary tumor that caused a 10-inch growth spurt in high school.

After leaving home at 17, Robbins worked as a janitor. Then, he began working for motivational speaker Jim Rohn and later began to run his own self-help and professional development seminars. Today, Robbins has a complete brand of coaching that offers trained coaches who work with budding entrepreneurs and others who want to move forward in business and life. 

• Anthony Robbins (Author)
• 688 Pages - 01/01/1800 (Publication Date) - Simon & Schuster Ltd; edition (2014-11-18) (Publisher)

With more than 6 million copies sold, The Magic of Thinking Big by  David Schwartz  has helped people around the world develop a more positive thought process. After studying at Georgia State University, Schwartz became well-known as a motivational expert.

The Magic of Thinking Big encourages readers to set high goals and believe in their ability to achieve them. In addition, Schwartz guides his readers through the process of using visualization to support their processes, as well as the importance of sharing good news with others to keep the positive energy flowing. 

Is it time for you to harness the power of positivity and take the next step in your writing career? Check out our post on the best writing contests.

• David J. Schwartz (Author)
• 276 Pages - 07/26/2015 (Publication Date) - Magdalene Press (Publisher)

Many have said that The Alchemist by  Paulo Coelho  is a story that can change your life — and 65 million people around the globe have experienced the powerful tale of how Santiago, a small-town shepherd boy, created his own reality.

Raised in Rio de Janeiro, Coelho rebelled against his family’s strict Roman Catholic values, resulting in his parents sending him to a psychiatric facility at a young age. Then, during a trip through Europe and Africa, Coelho walked the Santiago de Compostela, a 500-mile trek. Eight years later, Coelho wrote The Alchemist and became one of the top-selling self-help and motivational authors of all time. 

• Coelho, Paulo (Author)
• 208 Pages - 09/09/2014 (Publication Date) - HarperOne (Publisher)

The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom by  Don Miguel Ruiz  has sold more than nine million copies. Born and raised in rural Mexico, Ruiz did not start as a self-help guru helping others with life lessons. Instead, he was a practicing neurosurgeon before he became one of the best-known authors in the world. The Four Agreements offers readers steps that can provide long-term peace and transformation. Ruiz has also published The Fifth Agreement , co-authored by his son. 

• The Four Agreements Toltec Wisdom Collection
• Ruiz, Don Miguel (Author)
• 856 Pages - 09/01/2008 (Publication Date) - Amber-Allen Publishing (Publisher)

Bestselling author Robert Kiyosaki is a Hawaii-born Japanese-American who has become one of the most well-known personal finance experts. More than 32 million copies of Rich Dad Poor Dad have sold worldwide, and many look to  Robert Kiyosaki  for personal and business finance guidance.

Kiyosaki based his brand on his biological father, who was highly educated but struggled to earn a living, and his fictional other father, who was the richest man in Hawaii, despite being a high school dropout. Kiyosaki’s teachings have helped people worldwide rise above their circumstances and develop a sound financial future, no matter how they got their start. 

• Trade Paperback
• Kiyosaki, Robert T. (Author)
• 360 Pages - 08/16/2011 (Publication Date) - Plata Publishing (Publisher)

Viktor Frankl’s Man’s Search For Meaning has sold more than 10 million copies. The Austrian psychotherapist and psychiatrist believed that the purpose of therapy should be to help clients in their search for meaning in their lives. Frankl served as the chief of the female suicide prevention program at a psychiatric hospital before working as the chief of neurology at Vienna’s Rothschild Hospital.

Frankl’s wife and mother were killed in concentration camps during the Nazi occupation of Germany, and Frankl determined that people who had meaning in their lives were more likely to make it out of concentration camps than those who felt their lives lacked meaning. Later in life, Frankl taught at both the University of Vienna and at American universities. You might also be interested in our list of authors like Yung Pueblo .

• Frankl, Viktor E. (Author)
• 192 Pages - 04/25/2017 (Publication Date) - Beacon Press (Publisher)

Heralded by Oprah and other self-improvement superstars, Rhonda Byrne’s The Secret has sold more than 30 million copies. After a series of traumatic personal and professional events, Byrne discovered the law of attraction and researched how the law had served various populations over time. The Secret shares the law of attraction with readers, inviting them to stay focused on what they want in life. You might also enjoy these authors like Wayne Dyer .

• Byrne, Rhonda (Author)
• 736 Pages - 12/09/2008 (Publication Date) - Atria Books (Publisher)

While many self-help authors don’t get into writing to make money, personal development and motivation are lucrative markets. The authors listed above haven’t just transformed people’s lives — they’ve changed their own careers as well. There may be a stigma attached to reading books by self-help authors, but that is an old and outdated view.

Personal growth and development are something everybody should be encouraged to explore. The authors on this list, and the books they have written, are full of empowering and motivating ideas and concepts that can set you on the path to not just a brighter tomorrow, but a better you, today. 

FAQs On The Best Self-Help Authors

Today, some of the current top sellers in the self-help market include How To Win Friends and Influence People, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck, and The Power of Now.

The richest self-help author is Tony Robbins, with a net worth of $480 million.

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Bryan Collins is the owner of Become a Writer Today. He's an author from Ireland who helps writers build authority and earn a living from their creative work. He's also a former Forbes columnist and his work has appeared in publications like Lifehacker and Fast Company.

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Essay on Self Help

Students are often asked to write an essay on Self Help in their schools and colleges. And if you’re also looking for the same, we have created 100-word, 250-word, and 500-word essays on the topic.

Let’s take a look…

100 Words Essay on Self Help

Understanding self help.

Self Help means relying on one’s own efforts and resources rather than depending on others. It’s about taking responsibility and control of your own life.

Importance of Self Help

Self Help is crucial for personal growth. It helps us become independent, confident, and capable of facing any challenge in life.

Self Help in Daily Life

We can practice self help in daily life by doing our own tasks, solving our own problems, and making our own decisions.

Benefits of Self Help

Self Help builds self-esteem, promotes self-reliance, and encourages self-improvement. It’s the key to success and happiness in life.

250 Words Essay on Self Help

Introduction.

Self-help, often referred to as self-improvement, is a self-guided improvement strategy—usually with substantial psychological basis. It includes activities that improve awareness, identity, develop talents, build human capital, and facilitate employability, besides contributing to the realization of dreams and aspirations.

The Importance of Self-Help

The essence of self-help is the pursuit of knowledge and improvement without reliance on others. It encourages autonomy and self-reliance, fostering a sense of empowerment and control. This concept resonates with the modern world’s emphasis on individualism and personal responsibility.

The Role of Self-Help in Personal Development

Self-help plays a vital role in personal development. It encourages introspection, leading to self-awareness and self-understanding. This introspection can help individuals identify their strengths and weaknesses, allowing them to focus on areas that need improvement. Furthermore, self-help strategies often involve setting and working towards personal goals, a process that can improve motivation and self-esteem.

Self-Help and Mental Health

Self-help can also be a powerful tool for managing mental health. Many self-help strategies, such as mindfulness and cognitive behavioral techniques, have been shown to be effective in treating conditions like depression and anxiety. These techniques can be used alongside professional treatment or as a standalone approach.

In conclusion, self-help is a valuable tool for personal growth and mental health management. It fosters independence, self-awareness, and resilience, equipping individuals with the skills and knowledge they need to navigate life’s challenges. As such, self-help should be considered a key component of any comprehensive approach to personal development.

500 Words Essay on Self Help

Introduction to self help.

Self-help, as a concept, is deeply embedded in human nature and the pursuit of personal growth. It is the practice of individuals independently solving their own problems, enhancing their skills, or achieving their goals. This essay aims to discuss the importance and implications of self-help in our lives, emphasizing its role in personal development and societal contribution.

The Essence of Self Help

At its core, self-help is about self-reliance and self-improvement. It is an intrinsic drive to better oneself, to overcome personal obstacles, and to strive for a higher level of functioning. It is the embodiment of the famous proverb, “God helps those who help themselves.” This does not negate the value of external assistance, but rather emphasizes the primary role of personal effort and initiative in achieving one’s goals.

Self Help and Personal Development

The act of self-help is instrumental in personal development. It encourages introspection, which leads to a deeper understanding of oneself. Through self-help, individuals can identify their strengths and weaknesses, set realistic goals, and devise strategies to achieve them. It fosters resilience, as individuals learn to face challenges head-on, and cultivates a sense of self-efficacy, the belief in one’s ability to succeed.

Self Help in the Digital Age

In the digital age, the concept of self-help has transformed and expanded. The internet has provided a wealth of resources for self-help, from online courses and webinars to self-help books and motivational videos. These resources have made self-help more accessible, enabling individuals to learn new skills, gain knowledge, and improve their lives from the comfort of their homes.

Societal Implications of Self Help

On a broader scale, self-help contributes significantly to societal progress. When individuals improve themselves, they are better equipped to contribute to their communities and society at large. They become more productive, more responsible, and more capable of effecting positive change. Moreover, as more people engage in self-help, it fosters a culture of self-reliance and continuous learning, which can lead to collective growth and development.

Conclusion: The Power of Self Help

In conclusion, self-help is a powerful tool for personal and societal development. It empowers individuals to take charge of their lives, to overcome challenges, and to strive for continuous improvement. While external assistance can be valuable, it is ultimately the individual’s responsibility and initiative that determine their success. As we navigate the complexities of the modern world, the practice of self-help becomes increasingly crucial, embodying the essence of human resilience and the pursuit of growth.

That’s it! I hope the essay helped you.

If you’re looking for more, here are essays on other interesting topics:

• Essay on Self Esteem
• Essay on Self Defence
• Essay on Self Control

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College Essays

If you grow up to be a professional writer, everything you write will first go through an editor before being published. This is because the process of writing is really a process of re-writing —of rethinking and reexamining your work, usually with the help of someone else. So what does this mean for your student writing? And in particular, what does it mean for very important, but nonprofessional writing like your college essay? Should you ask your parents to look at your essay? Pay for an essay service?

If you are wondering what kind of help you can, and should, get with your personal statement, you've come to the right place! In this article, I'll talk about what kind of writing help is useful, ethical, and even expected for your college admission essay . I'll also point out who would make a good editor, what the differences between editing and proofreading are, what to expect from a good editor, and how to spot and stay away from a bad one.

Table of Contents

What Kind of Help for Your Essay Can You Get?

What's Good Editing?

What should an editor do for you, what kind of editing should you avoid, proofreading, what's good proofreading, what kind of proofreading should you avoid.

What Do Colleges Think Of You Getting Help With Your Essay?

Who Can/Should Help You?

Advice for editors.

Should You Pay Money For Essay Editing?

The Bottom Line

What's next, what kind of help with your essay can you get.

Rather than talking in general terms about "help," let's first clarify the two different ways that someone else can improve your writing . There is editing, which is the more intensive kind of assistance that you can use throughout the whole process. And then there's proofreading, which is the last step of really polishing your final product.

Let me go into some more detail about editing and proofreading, and then explain how good editors and proofreaders can help you."

Editing is helping the author (in this case, you) go from a rough draft to a finished work . Editing is the process of asking questions about what you're saying, how you're saying it, and how you're organizing your ideas. But not all editing is good editing . In fact, it's very easy for an editor to cross the line from supportive to overbearing and over-involved.

Ability to clarify assignments. A good editor is usually a good writer, and certainly has to be a good reader. For example, in this case, a good editor should make sure you understand the actual essay prompt you're supposed to be answering.

Open-endedness. Good editing is all about asking questions about your ideas and work, but without providing answers. It's about letting you stick to your story and message, and doesn't alter your point of view.

Think of an editor as a great travel guide. It can show you the many different places your trip could take you. It should explain any parts of the trip that could derail your trip or confuse the traveler. But it never dictates your path, never forces you to go somewhere you don't want to go, and never ignores your interests so that the trip no longer seems like it's your own. So what should good editors do?

Help Brainstorm Topics

Sometimes it's easier to bounce thoughts off of someone else. This doesn't mean that your editor gets to come up with ideas, but they can certainly respond to the various topic options you've come up with. This way, you're less likely to write about the most boring of your ideas, or to write about something that isn't actually important to you.

If you're wondering how to come up with options for your editor to consider, check out our guide to brainstorming topics for your college essay .

Help Revise Your Drafts

Here, your editor can't upset the delicate balance of not intervening too much or too little. It's tricky, but a great way to think about it is to remember: editing is about asking questions, not giving answers .

Revision questions should point out:

• Places where more detail or more description would help the reader connect with your essay
• Places where structure and logic don't flow, losing the reader's attention
• Places where there aren't transitions between paragraphs, confusing the reader
• Moments where your narrative or the arguments you're making are unclear

But pointing to potential problems is not the same as actually rewriting—editors let authors fix the problems themselves.

Bad editing is usually very heavy-handed editing. Instead of helping you find your best voice and ideas, a bad editor changes your writing into their own vision.

You may be dealing with a bad editor if they:

• Add material (examples, descriptions) that doesn't come from you
• Use a thesaurus to make your college essay sound "more mature"
• Add meaning or insight to the essay that doesn't come from you
• Tell you what to say and how to say it
• Write sentences, phrases, and paragraphs for you
• Change your voice in the essay so it no longer sounds like it was written by a teenager

Colleges can tell the difference between a 17-year-old's writing and a 50-year-old's writing. Not only that, they have access to your SAT or ACT Writing section, so they can compare your essay to something else you wrote. Writing that's a little more polished is great and expected. But a totally different voice and style will raise questions.

Where's the Line Between Helpful Editing and Unethical Over-Editing?

Sometimes it's hard to tell whether your college essay editor is doing the right thing. Here are some guidelines for staying on the ethical side of the line.

• An editor should say that the opening paragraph is kind of boring, and explain what exactly is making it drag. But it's overstepping for an editor to tell you exactly how to change it.
• An editor should point out where your prose is unclear or vague. But it's completely inappropriate for the editor to rewrite that section of your essay.
• An editor should let you know that a section is light on detail or description. But giving you similes and metaphors to beef up that description is a no-go.

Proofreading (also called copy-editing) is checking for errors in the last draft of a written work. It happens at the end of the process and is meant as the final polishing touch. Proofreading is meticulous and detail-oriented, focusing on small corrections. It sands off all the surface rough spots that could alienate the reader.

Because proofreading is usually concerned with making fixes on the word or sentence level, this is the only process where someone else can actually add to or take away things from your essay . This is because what they are adding or taking away tends to be one or two misplaced letters.

Laser focus. Proofreading is all about the tiny details, so the ability to really concentrate on finding small slip-ups is a must.

Excellent grammar and spelling skills. Proofreaders need to dot every "i" and cross every "t." Good proofreaders should correct spelling, punctuation, capitalization, and grammar. They should put foreign words in italics and surround quotations with quotation marks. They should check that you used the correct college's name, and that you adhered to any formatting requirements (name and date at the top of the page, uniform font and size, uniform spacing).

Limited interference. A proofreader needs to make sure that you followed any word limits. But if cuts need to be made to shorten the essay, that's your job and not the proofreader's.

A bad proofreader either tries to turn into an editor, or just lacks the skills and knowledge necessary to do the job.

Some signs that you're working with a bad proofreader are:

• If they suggest making major changes to the final draft of your essay. Proofreading happens when editing is already finished.
• If they aren't particularly good at spelling, or don't know grammar, or aren't detail-oriented enough to find someone else's small mistakes.
• If they start swapping out your words for fancier-sounding synonyms, or changing the voice and sound of your essay in other ways. A proofreader is there to check for errors, not to take the 17-year-old out of your writing.

What Do Colleges Think of Your Getting Help With Your Essay?

Admissions officers agree: light editing and proofreading are good—even required ! But they also want to make sure you're the one doing the work on your essay. They want essays with stories, voice, and themes that come from you. They want to see work that reflects your actual writing ability, and that focuses on what you find important.

On the Importance of Editing

Get feedback. Have a fresh pair of eyes give you some feedback. Don't allow someone else to rewrite your essay, but do take advantage of others' edits and opinions when they seem helpful. ( Bates College )

Read your essay aloud to someone. Reading the essay out loud offers a chance to hear how your essay sounds outside your head. This exercise reveals flaws in the essay's flow, highlights grammatical errors and helps you ensure that you are communicating the exact message you intended. ( Dickinson College )

On the Value of Proofreading

Share your essays with at least one or two people who know you well—such as a parent, teacher, counselor, or friend—and ask for feedback. Remember that you ultimately have control over your essays, and your essays should retain your own voice, but others may be able to catch mistakes that you missed and help suggest areas to cut if you are over the word limit. ( Yale University )

Proofread and then ask someone else to proofread for you. Although we want substance, we also want to be able to see that you can write a paper for our professors and avoid careless mistakes that would drive them crazy. ( Oberlin College )

On Watching Out for Too Much Outside Influence

Limit the number of people who review your essay. Too much input usually means your voice is lost in the writing style. ( Carleton College )

Ask for input (but not too much). Your parents, friends, guidance counselors, coaches, and teachers are great people to bounce ideas off of for your essay. They know how unique and spectacular you are, and they can help you decide how to articulate it. Keep in mind, however, that a 45-year-old lawyer writes quite differently from an 18-year-old student, so if your dad ends up writing the bulk of your essay, we're probably going to notice. ( Vanderbilt University )

Now let's talk about some potential people to approach for your college essay editing and proofreading needs. It's best to start close to home and slowly expand outward. Not only are your family and friends more invested in your success than strangers, but they also have a better handle on your interests and personality. This knowledge is key for judging whether your essay is expressing your true self.

Parents or Close Relatives

Your family may be full of potentially excellent editors! Parents are deeply committed to your well-being, and family members know you and your life well enough to offer details or incidents that can be included in your essay. On the other hand, the rewriting process necessarily involves criticism, which is sometimes hard to hear from someone very close to you.

A parent or close family member is a great choice for an editor if you can answer "yes" to the following questions. Is your parent or close relative a good writer or reader? Do you have a relationship where editing your essay won't create conflict? Are you able to constructively listen to criticism and suggestion from the parent?

One suggestion for defusing face-to-face discussions is to try working on the essay over email. Send your parent a draft, have them write you back some comments, and then you can pick which of their suggestions you want to use and which to discard.

Teachers or Tutors

A humanities teacher that you have a good relationship with is a great choice. I am purposefully saying humanities, and not just English, because teachers of Philosophy, History, Anthropology, and any other classes where you do a lot of writing, are all used to reviewing student work.

Moreover, any teacher or tutor that has been working with you for some time, knows you very well and can vet the essay to make sure it "sounds like you."

If your teacher or tutor has some experience with what college essays are supposed to be like, ask them to be your editor. If not, then ask whether they have time to proofread your final draft.

Guidance or College Counselor at Your School

The best thing about asking your counselor to edit your work is that this is their job. This means that they have a very good sense of what colleges are looking for in an application essay.

At the same time, school counselors tend to have relationships with admissions officers in many colleges, which again gives them insight into what works and which college is focused on what aspect of the application.

Unfortunately, in many schools the guidance counselor tends to be way overextended. If your ratio is 300 students to 1 college counselor, you're unlikely to get that person's undivided attention and focus. It is still useful to ask them for general advice about your potential topics, but don't expect them to be able to stay with your essay from first draft to final version.

Friends, Siblings, or Classmates

Although they most likely don't have much experience with what colleges are hoping to see, your peers are excellent sources for checking that your essay is you .

Friends and siblings are perfect for the read-aloud edit. Read your essay to them so they can listen for words and phrases that are stilted, pompous, or phrases that just don't sound like you.

You can even trade essays and give helpful advice on each other's work.

If your editor hasn't worked with college admissions essays very much, no worries! Any astute and attentive reader can still greatly help with your process. But, as in all things, beginners do better with some preparation.

First, your editor should read our advice about how to write a college essay introduction , how to spot and fix a bad college essay , and get a sense of what other students have written by going through some admissions essays that worked .

Then, as they read your essay, they can work through the following series of questions that will help them to guide you.

Introduction Questions

• Is the first sentence a killer opening line? Why or why not?
• Does the introduction hook the reader? Does it have a colorful, detailed, and interesting narrative? Or does it propose a compelling or surprising idea?
• Can you feel the author's voice in the introduction, or is the tone dry, dull, or overly formal? Show the places where the voice comes through.

Essay Body Questions

• Does the essay have a through-line? Is it built around a central argument, thought, idea, or focus? Can you put this idea into your own words?
• How is the essay organized? By logical progression? Chronologically? Do you feel order when you read it, or are there moments where you are confused or lose the thread of the essay?
• Does the essay have both narratives about the author's life and explanations and insight into what these stories reveal about the author's character, personality, goals, or dreams? If not, which is missing?
• Does the essay flow? Are there smooth transitions/clever links between paragraphs? Between the narrative and moments of insight?

Reader Response Questions

• Does the writer's personality come through? Do we know what the speaker cares about? Do we get a sense of "who he or she is"?
• Where did you feel most connected to the essay? Which parts of the essay gave you a "you are there" sensation by invoking your senses? What moments could you picture in your head well?
• Where are the details and examples vague and not specific enough?
• Did you get an "a-ha!" feeling anywhere in the essay? Is there a moment of insight that connected all the dots for you? Is there a good reveal or "twist" anywhere in the essay?
• What are the strengths of this essay? What needs the most improvement?

Should You Pay Money for Essay Editing?

One alternative to asking someone you know to help you with your college essay is the paid editor route. There are two different ways to pay for essay help: a private essay coach or a less personal editing service , like the many proliferating on the internet.

My advice is to think of these options as a last resort rather than your go-to first choice. I'll first go through the reasons why. Then, if you do decide to go with a paid editor, I'll help you decide between a coach and a service.

When to Consider a Paid Editor

In general, I think hiring someone to work on your essay makes a lot of sense if none of the people I discussed above are a possibility for you.

If you can't ask your parents. For example, if your parents aren't good writers, or if English isn't their first language. Or if you think getting your parents to help is going create unnecessary extra conflict in your relationship with them (applying to college is stressful as it is!)

If you can't ask your teacher or tutor. Maybe you don't have a trusted teacher or tutor that has time to look over your essay with focus. Or, for instance, your favorite humanities teacher has very limited experience with college essays and so won't know what admissions officers want to see.

If you can't ask your guidance counselor. This could be because your guidance counselor is way overwhelmed with other students.

If you can't share your essay with those who know you. It might be that your essay is on a very personal topic that you're unwilling to share with parents, teachers, or peers. Just make sure it doesn't fall into one of the bad-idea topics in our article on bad college essays .

If the cost isn't a consideration. Many of these services are quite expensive, and private coaches even more so. If you have finite resources, I'd say that hiring an SAT or ACT tutor (whether it's PrepScholar or someone else) is better way to spend your money . This is because there's no guarantee that a slightly better essay will sufficiently elevate the rest of your application, but a significantly higher SAT score will definitely raise your applicant profile much more.

Should You Hire an Essay Coach?

On the plus side, essay coaches have read dozens or even hundreds of college essays, so they have experience with the format. Also, because you'll be working closely with a specific person, it's more personal than sending your essay to a service, which will know even less about you.

But, on the minus side, you'll still be bouncing ideas off of someone who doesn't know that much about you . In general, if you can adequately get the help from someone you know, there is no advantage to paying someone to help you.

If you do decide to hire a coach, ask your school counselor, or older students that have used the service for recommendations. If you can't afford the coach's fees, ask whether they can work on a sliding scale —many do. And finally, beware those who guarantee admission to your school of choice—essay coaches don't have any special magic that can back up those promises.

Should You Send Your Essay to a Service?

On the plus side, essay editing services provide a similar product to essay coaches, and they cost significantly less . If you have some assurance that you'll be working with a good editor, the lack of face-to-face interaction won't prevent great results.

On the minus side, however, it can be difficult to gauge the quality of the service before working with them . If they are churning through many application essays without getting to know the students they are helping, you could end up with an over-edited essay that sounds just like everyone else's. In the worst case scenario, an unscrupulous service could send you back a plagiarized essay.

Getting recommendations from friends or a school counselor for reputable services is key to avoiding heavy-handed editing that writes essays for you or does too much to change your essay. Including a badly-edited essay like this in your application could cause problems if there are inconsistencies. For example, in interviews it might be clear you didn't write the essay, or the skill of the essay might not be reflected in your schoolwork and test scores.

Should You Buy an Essay Written by Someone Else?

Let me elaborate. There are super sketchy places on the internet where you can simply buy a pre-written essay. Don't do this!

For one thing, you'll be lying on an official, signed document. All college applications make you sign a statement saying something like this:

I certify that all information submitted in the admission process—including the application, the personal essay, any supplements, and any other supporting materials—is my own work, factually true, and honestly presented... I understand that I may be subject to a range of possible disciplinary actions, including admission revocation, expulsion, or revocation of course credit, grades, and degree, should the information I have certified be false. (From the Common Application )

For another thing, if your academic record doesn't match the essay's quality, the admissions officer will start thinking your whole application is riddled with lies.

Admission officers have full access to your writing portion of the SAT or ACT so that they can compare work that was done in proctored conditions with that done at home. They can tell if these were written by different people. Not only that, but there are now a number of search engines that faculty and admission officers can use to see if an essay contains strings of words that have appeared in other essays—you have no guarantee that the essay you bought wasn't also bought by 50 other students.

• You should get college essay help with both editing and proofreading
• A good editor will ask questions about your idea, logic, and structure, and will point out places where clarity is needed
• A good editor will absolutely not answer these questions, give you their own ideas, or write the essay or parts of the essay for you
• A good proofreader will find typos and check your formatting
• All of them agree that getting light editing and proofreading is necessary
• Parents, teachers, guidance or college counselor, and peers or siblings
• If you can't ask any of those, you can pay for college essay help, but watch out for services or coaches who over-edit you work
• Don't buy a pre-written essay! Colleges can tell, and it'll make your whole application sound false.

Ready to start working on your essay? Check out our explanation of the point of the personal essay and the role it plays on your applications and then explore our step-by-step guide to writing a great college essay .

Using the Common Application for your college applications? We have an excellent guide to the Common App essay prompts and useful advice on how to pick the Common App prompt that's right for you . Wondering how other people tackled these prompts? Then work through our roundup of over 130 real college essay examples published by colleges .

Stressed about whether to take the SAT again before submitting your application? Let us help you decide how many times to take this test . If you choose to go for it, we have the ultimate guide to studying for the SAT to give you the ins and outs of the best ways to study.

Anna scored in the 99th percentile on her SATs in high school, and went on to major in English at Princeton and to get her doctorate in English Literature at Columbia. She is passionate about improving student access to higher education.

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How To Write A Self-Help Book That Transforms Lives: 8 Expert Tips

POSTED ON Apr 5, 2024

Written by Sarah Rexford

You're here because you're wondering how to write a self-help book that actually makes an impact.

And you're in the right place.

Learning how to write a self-help book effectively can help your author career thrive, boost an existing business , and change thousands of lives for the better. Because what is a self-help book if it doesn't help people!?

With so many self-help books in the market, writing one in a way that truly stands out is crucial to its success.

If you clicked on this article, it’s likely that you want to know how to write a self-help book because you have plans to pen one in the near future. Or perhaps you've already started writing a book. Maybe you only have a very faint book idea and aren't sure whether you should follow through with it (spoiler: you should).

No matter where you find yourself in your writing journey, you can use these tips for how to write a self-help book to level up your initial rough draft or manuscript. 

In this article, I break down how to write a self-help book into eight simple steps, using tips that deeply impact your readers and, ultimately, transform lives. While the success of your book can never be guaranteed, learning how to write a self-help book in a way that connects with readers is foundational.

Need A Nonfiction Book Outline?

This Guide to How to Write A Self-Help Book Will Cover:

What is a self-help book.

A self-help book is a book written to help people improve a certain aspect of their lives. What is a self-help book meant to help with? It could be anything from boosting your confidence to making a productive morning routine to organizing your house.

It doesn't matter what a self-help book is helping you with, as long as it helps and inspires you!

Why Should You Study How To Write A Self-Help Book?

The self-help book market is a thriving industry worth $10.5 billion as of 2020. That’s right, billion, not million. With these types of numbers, studying how to write a self-book is not just a good choice. It’s a no-brainer. 

Everyone has learned something in their life that they can teach to someone else – they just need to learn how to write a self-help book properly first.

So let’s dive into our top eight tips that will better your chances of standing out, impact your readers, and ultimately, reach your audience the way they most need it.

8 Actionable Tips for How to Write A Self-Help Book

If you want to learn how to write a self-help book, these are the tips you should follow:

1. Choose A Niche Topic

Self-help is a massive genre. You can find self-help books for anything from cooking basics to how to leverage your habits for massive success.

To stand out, you need to go deeper. You need a very specific subgenre or niche.

Writing about cooking healthy meals for a healthier lifestyle is not a bad self-help idea, but try taking it a step further: What about cooking healthy, vegetarian-friendly meals for busy lifestyles?

Instead of writing a general book about yoga poses, why not write one on easy-to-do yoga stretches and practices for post-surgery patients?

See the difference? In each of these examples of self-help books, one is broad, and one is focused.  

Whether you’ve already drafted your book or have just started writing, make sure you identify your precise niche to narrowly target your intended audience.

2. Layer In Your Unique Credibility

Never underestimate the power of your credibility. To continue with the healthy eating example, let’s say you chose to attend a four-year college, worked three jobs while taking full-time classes, and let your eating habits slip during those busy years. 

Now, you’ve graduated, have a successful career, AND have completely transformed your eating habits. You’re healthier than ever, and bonus , you have your undergraduate degree in nutritional sciences.

Your credibility isn't always just about your credentials. It includes your personal journey, experiences, and transformation, too.

Layer these details throughout your book to establish your credibility and create a stronger connection with your readers.

3. Use Personal Anecdotes (Sparingly!)

Let's build on the credibility bit, because it can overlap with your personal story a great deal.

Many self-help books are also books about a true story . Yours! This is definitely one way to write a book no one else can.

It would be simple to present yourself as the hero of your story. After all, you’re the one who had the experience.

But that would turn writing a self-help book into a memoir or autobiography . Instead, keep the focus on actionable advice. Choose to come alongside your reader, use nostalgic writing or personal anecdotes that don’t always show you as the hero, and share your story as supplemental fodder to the steps you ask your readers to take. 

Remember, a writing a self-help book is about helping your readers, not a personal memoir , so use your anecdotes only if they truly benefit your readers or will inspire them to take action. And if you're considering writing about perseverance, bear in mind that the same principles hold true for how to write about perseverance .

4. Focus On Structure 

When learning how to write a self-help book, structure is paramount. It drastically impacts how your readers digest your material.

First and foremost, you need to ensure you are sharing steps in a way that they can be followed. For example, when we write about how to write a nonfiction book , we begin with prewriting strategies such as mind mapping, outlining, and then writing a rough draft.

If we spoke about those steps in a different order, it would be difficult for our readers to understand which step to take next.

You may also want to include next steps, homework, or questions for discussion at the end of each chapter. Below are a few ideas for structuring and writing a self-help book:

• Follow a chronological timeline and take your reader on a journey 
• Open with the dream life your audience wants and then show them how to achieve it
• Focus on small goals throughout the manuscript that work together to lead to the ultimate goal 

Have fun with your structure and feel free to play around with various options. 

5. Know What Your Audience Knows

Understanding exactly what your audience knows (and doesn't know) about your topic is likely one of the biggest contributors to book sales and successful self-help book launches.

If you aren't meeting them where they're at and saying things that resonate with what they want, they won't pick up your book.

Work to avoid laying foundations your audience will view as juvenile or obvious. But at the same time, don’t push your audience too fast or make too many assumptions about what they know on the subject.

This may seem difficult to balance, but it comes down to deeply understanding your audience and their unique problems.

Related: How Much Money Can You Make From Writing a Self-Help or Business Book?

6. Repeat, Rephrase, Reframe

Most people need old lessons repeated to them in new ways more than they need to learn something new.

For instance, most people understand that establishing positive habits is crucial to a healthy, successful life. 

If you’re familiar with James Clear, author of Atomic Habits, you know he took this knowledge, repeated it, rephrased it, and reframed it in a way that landed him a spot on the New York Times bestseller list . Today, his estimated net worth is $8 million .

People thrive on repetition. 

Want to know how to write a self-help book that leverages this technique? Practice saying the same thing in different ways, and experiment with different verbs and nouns to keep your writing interesting.

Related: Improve Your Writing with This Free Tool

7. Provide An Achievable Goal

A list of tips for how to write a self-help book would not be complete without mentioning the importance of achievable goals . One aspect I believe helped James Clear succeed so massively with Atomic Habits was his focus on small, achievable habits. The emphasis on realistic goals is important for how to write a motivational book , as it helps readers feel empowered to take action and experience tangible progress, fueling their motivation and belief in their ability to achieve their larger goals.

The same goes for any self-help book, no matter how niche.

Audiences want to feel empowered so they can go live empowered lives. Self-help is about teaching individuals how to help themselves move forward. This means the goal must be achievable.

All goals take some level of effort, but you want to make sure you are pushing your readers toward something they can implement and start to see change from in the next 30 days.

8. Be Actionable

I've mentioned this multiple times throughout this guide, but it bears mentioning once more.

The goal of learning how to write a self-help book is learning how to write something that people can – and feel inspired to – take action from.

These steps should be ones they can take today, tomorrow, or this week. And should include clear directions.

For example, if your book focuses on harnessing creativity, what is a step they could take today? 

If you write about starting a side hustle as a stay-at-home mom, what are some helpful steps you could provide for already overwhelmed mothers?

Or, let’s say you want to provide teenagers with ways to start investing early. Most teenagers don’t have much financially, let alone thousands of dollars to invest.

How can they take one small action today that will impact their lives in a decade?

Share Your Influence, Leave A Legacy 

Everyone has a unique story to tell, and those stories have the ability to change lives.

You read this article not just because you want to learn how to write a self-help book but because you feel driven to help people.

When someone poses the question, ‘ What is your legacy ?', you are eager and ready to share your meaningful response.

You likely have some level of influence or credibility, or have transformed your own life in a profound way, which is why you chose to learn how to write a self-help book. The more you fine-tune how you write your book, the more potential it has for influence.

If you’re eager to start writing your book today, use the free resource below to help you start your nonfiction outline. This nonfiction book outline can help you reach your end goal (aka: a finished, impactful manuscript) faster.

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4 Great Ways to Boost Your Self-Care and Well-Being

How to water the flowers, not the weeds, in the garden of your life..

Posted May 6, 2024 | Reviewed by Jessica Schrader

• Find a therapist near me
• Nobody can do our self-care for us.
• In each moment of our lives, we can choose how we see ourselves and the world around us.
• Rather than labeling ourselves "good" or "bad," we can learn to accept ourselves with greater self-compassion.

There’s what we want. And then there’s what is.

Life is filled with beautiful flowers. And then there are the weeds. And nobody can protect us from the weeds, dry soil, and rocky ground in the gardens of our lives. There’s no fence tall enough to keep out unwanted intrusions, emotions, and experiences.

How do we deal with the weeds? What strategies can help us notice the beauty, colors, and fragrances of the flowers and trees? How might we deal with the weeds when we first notice them, before they get too big and potentially destructive?

Of course, putting the metaphors aside, here’s the big question: How do we learn to take care of the gardens of our own day-to-day lives? Sooner or later we learn, sometimes the hard way, that nobody can do our self-care for us:

• Our lives are our gardens and we’re more vulnerable than we’d like to be.
• We need enough water, sunlight, and good soil to thrive.
• We need to take care of ourselves and can’t depend on others to do our self-care for us.
• We need to water the flowers, not the weeds.

Yes, there’s what you want and what is. Yet in each moment, you can choose how you see yourself and the world around you (Miller, 2021). And although others can support and cheer you on, it’s on you to care for your own garden.

What do you need for self-care? There are many pathways to self-care and thriving. Here are a few:

1. Connecting With Your Values. Your values are like your inner compass, letting you know what’s truly important to you, inviting you toward where you want to focus your energies, and offering a source of insight and motivation .

It’s so easy to get lost in the day-to-day, misplacing what really matters to you in the big picture of your existence. Losing touch with your values can be like watering the weeds and can cause many kinds of suffering. Conversely, making choices based on your values offers greater meaning and direction. The values you choose to live by are up to you. What do you truly value?

2. Awakening and Practicing Self-Compassion. According to psychologist Kristen Neff, Ph.D., self-compassion involves seeing your own life in the light of common human experience. Rather than labeling yourself as "good" or "bad," you can learn to accept yourself with a more open heart (2011). This shift in perspective can be life-changing. How would it be if you offered yourself the same kindness and caring that you would share with a good friend or loved one?

Neff writes that typically there’s almost no person who we treat as badly as we treat ourselves. Yet, there are many pathways to increase self-compassion, offering yourself the tenderness and kindness you need.

One place to begin is to gently offer yourself care, with kind words and a reassuring tone of voice (Neff, 2021, 2011; Salzburg, 2010). For example: “It’s OK honey, you’re OK.” When something disturbs you, you can try to be more patient with yourself. Neff recommends writing to yourself regularly with kind, comforting words. You might write in a journal or record your kind thoughts on an electronic device.

3. Enjoying Experiences That Bring You Pleasure. There’s no formula for what different people enjoy, but this brief list offers a few examples:

Go outside in nature. Play games. Watch a movie or a concert. Nurture your garden, in a window or outdoors. Walk with a friend or your dog. Enjoy the sun shining in through a window. Hang out with a loved one, friend, or acquaintance you enjoy. Call someone you care about. Volunteer. Create art, music, or a craft. Write a poem or story just for fun. Cook something you enjoy. Do a random act of kindness.

4. Putting Things Into Perspective With Gratitude . Whether the day is going well or poorly, it can be helpful to remind yourself of what you are thankful for. Even when times are tough, pausing to notice a small positive moment, experience, or event can offer you greater perspective.

What do you need for self-care in the garden of your life? How can you take a step toward watering the flowers, not the weeds?

Disclaimer: This post is for informational purposes only. No content is a substitute for consulting with a qualified mental health or healthcare professional.

© 2024 Ilene Berns-Zare, LLC. All rights reserved.

Miller, L. (2021). The awakened brain: The new science of spirituality and our quest for an inspired life . New York, NY: Random House.

Neff, K., (2021). Fierce self-compassion: How women can harness kindness to speak up, claim their power, and thrive. New York, NY: HarperCollins.

Neff, K. (2011 ). Self-compassion: The proven power of being kind to yourself . New York, NY: William Morrow.

Salzberg, S. (2010). The force of kindness: Change your life with love & compassion . Boulder, CO: Sounds True.

Ilene Berns-Zare, PsyD, is a life and leadership coach. She writes about navigating personal and professional life with resilience, meaning, mindfulness, and well-being.

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Home — Essay Samples — Life — Career — Self Evaluation Essay Examples

Self Evaluation Essay Examples

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How to Deal with Self Harm

We all need healthy ways to cope with the hard stuff. We’re here to help you find a healthy alternative to self-harm.

What is Self-Harm?

For some people, when depression and anxiety lead to a tornado of emotions, they turn to self-harm looking for a release. Self-harm and self-injury are any forms of hurting oneself on purpose. Usually, when people self-harm, they do not do so as a suicide attempt. Rather, they self-harm as a way to release painful emotions.

Types of Self-Harm

Self-harm can manifest differently for everyone. And, the ways people may self-harm extend far beyond the usual references to cutting in media. Simply, self-harm is anything and everything someone can do to purposely hurt their body.

Here are some of the most common types of self-injury:

• Carving words or symbols into the skin
• Hitting or punching oneself (including banging one’s head or other body parts against another surface)
• Piercing the skin with sharp objects such as hairpins
• Pulling out hair
• Picking at existing wounds

Symptoms of Self-Harm

Stigma creates shame and embarrassment, making it hard for people who self-harm to get help. So, look out for yourself and for your pals. If you suspect that someone in your life is self-harming, here are some warning signs to keep top of mind:

• Fresh cuts, burns, scratches, or bruises
• Rubbing an area excessively to create a burn
• Having sharp objects on hand
• Wearing long sleeves or long pants, even in hot weather
• Difficulties with interpersonal relationships
• Persistent questions about personal identity
• Behavioral and emotional instability, impulsiveness, or unpredictability
• Saying that they feel helpless, hopeless, or worthless

Crisis Text Line can help you deal with self-harm. Text a Crisis Counselor at 741741, or use the mobile text button below.

How to Deal With Self-Harm

Emotions can be really painful sometimes. It’s totally normal to need ways to cope with and process the hard things in your life. If you are using self-harm to manage your emotions, we’re here for you. And, we want to help keep you safe.

Here are some ways to push through, process, and cope with your emotions.

• Text to cool down. If you’re dealing with painful emotions, we’re here to help. Shoot us a text to connect with a real human and strategize healthy coping mechanisms to manage your emotions. Text HOME to 741741 to connect with a real human.
• Get creative. Studies show that diving into making art can help people process emotions. So, next time you’re feeling like self-harming, grab your sharpie and doodle your worries away. A bonus: you can totally suck at it and still reap the same rewards.
• Find your zen. Keeping yourself safe from self-harming is all about finding healthy alternatives to work through the hard stuff. Researchers found taking time to re-center through meditation to be a powerful way to find your cool and calm. Try using an app like Headspace to get on the meditation bandwagon.
• Talk to a pro. Self-harm is serious. And, while the intention behind self-harm usually is not death, it can still be dangerous—both physically and emotionally. Talking to someone who can help you find alternatives is incredibly important. Of course, you can start by texting us. Also, consider telling someone you know who can help you connect with a professional.

Why Do People Self-Harm?

Let’s start with this: everyone needs a way to cope with their emotions. People who self-harm have turned to hurting themselves as their coping mechanism to manage their emotions.

So, people might self-harm to:

• Process their negative feelings
• Distract themselves from their negative feelings
• Feel something physical, particularly if they are feeling numb
• Develop a sense of control over their lives
• Punish themselves for things they think they’ve done wrong
• Express emotions that they are otherwise embarrassed to show

Effects of Self-Harm

Self-harm can be seriously dangerous—physically, emotionally, socially, all of it.

Physical Effects of Self-Harm

• Permanent scars
• Uncontrolled bleeding
• Emotional Effects of Self-Harm
• Guilt or shame
• A diminished sense of self, including feeling helpless or worthless
• Addiction to the behavior

Social Effects of Self-Harm

• Avoiding friends and loved ones
• Becoming ostracized from loved ones who may not understand
• Interpersonal difficulty from lying to others about injuries

Recovering from Self-Harm

A lot of people who self-harm do so because they are dealing with painful emotions. If this applies to you, hi—we believe in you and recognize your pain. Because painful emotions are at the root of self-harm, quite often recovering from self-harm involves addressing emotions.

Breaking away from the cycle of self-harm can feel like a huge climb. It involves breaking a habit that has once brought comfort from pain. But, it is not impossible. Here are some steps to set you up for success:

• Name your reason for hurting yourself and your reason for quitting. Ask yourself: “What do I feel before, during, and after self-injury? Which of those emotions do I actively seek out, and which are harmful?”
• Identify other ways of achieving the same result. For example, if you self-harm for the physical sensation, seek other ways of releasing endorphins, like exercise. For real, try throwing a few punches at a kickboxing class or tapping it back in a spin class with the *perfect* playlist. If you self-harm to express your emotions, practice expressing them in words by writing them down. Grab a pen and your favorite notebook, or start typing away in your notes app.
• Tackle the underlying emotions. Explore the feelings that lead you to want to hurt yourself. If it’s guilt, where is that guilt coming from? Maybe try finding a therapist—there are pros trained specifically to help with this.
• Tell someone you trust. Let a friend, family member, or trusted adult know what you’re going through and that you need their support. Opening up to people can be easier said than done. Here’s a place to start: “I’m having a hard time processing some painful emotions and I could use your support right now.”

Getting healthy—both in your brain and in your body—takes hard work. You got this. And, we believe in you.

Text a Crisis Counselor at 741471 or use the mobile click to text button below. You’re not alone.

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What I’ve Learned From My Students’ College Essays

The genre is often maligned for being formulaic and melodramatic, but it’s more important than you think.

By Nell Freudenberger

Most high school seniors approach the college essay with dread. Either their upbringing hasn’t supplied them with several hundred words of adversity, or worse, they’re afraid that packaging the genuine trauma they’ve experienced is the only way to secure their future. The college counselor at the Brooklyn high school where I’m a writing tutor advises against trauma porn. “Keep it brief , ” she says, “and show how you rose above it.”

I started volunteering in New York City schools in my 20s, before I had kids of my own. At the time, I liked hanging out with teenagers, whom I sometimes had more interesting conversations with than I did my peers. Often I worked with students who spoke English as a second language or who used slang in their writing, and at first I was hung up on grammar. Should I correct any deviation from “standard English” to appeal to some Wizard of Oz behind the curtains of a college admissions office? Or should I encourage students to write the way they speak, in pursuit of an authentic voice, that most elusive of literary qualities?

In fact, I was missing the point. One of many lessons the students have taught me is to let the story dictate the voice of the essay. A few years ago, I worked with a boy who claimed to have nothing to write about. His life had been ordinary, he said; nothing had happened to him. I asked if he wanted to try writing about a family member, his favorite school subject, a summer job? He glanced at his phone, his posture and expression suggesting that he’d rather be anywhere but in front of a computer with me. “Hobbies?” I suggested, without much hope. He gave me a shy glance. “I like to box,” he said.

I’ve had this experience with reluctant writers again and again — when a topic clicks with a student, an essay can unfurl spontaneously. Of course the primary goal of a college essay is to help its author get an education that leads to a career. Changes in testing policies and financial aid have made applying to college more confusing than ever, but essays have remained basically the same. I would argue that they’re much more than an onerous task or rote exercise, and that unlike standardized tests they are infinitely variable and sometimes beautiful. College essays also provide an opportunity to learn precision, clarity and the process of working toward the truth through multiple revisions.

When a topic clicks with a student, an essay can unfurl spontaneously.

Even if writing doesn’t end up being fundamental to their future professions, students learn to choose language carefully and to be suspicious of the first words that come to mind. Especially now, as college students shoulder so much of the country’s ethical responsibility for war with their protest movement, essay writing teaches prospective students an increasingly urgent lesson: that choosing their own words over ready-made phrases is the only reliable way to ensure they’re thinking for themselves.

Teenagers are ideal writers for several reasons. They’re usually free of preconceptions about writing, and they tend not to use self-consciously ‘‘literary’’ language. They’re allergic to hypocrisy and are generally unfiltered: They overshare, ask personal questions and call you out for microaggressions as well as less egregious (but still mortifying) verbal errors, such as referring to weed as ‘‘pot.’’ Most important, they have yet to put down their best stories in a finished form.

I can imagine an essay taking a risk and distinguishing itself formally — a poem or a one-act play — but most kids use a more straightforward model: a hook followed by a narrative built around “small moments” that lead to a concluding lesson or aspiration for the future. I never get tired of working with students on these essays because each one is different, and the short, rigid form sometimes makes an emotional story even more powerful. Before I read Javier Zamora’s wrenching “Solito,” I worked with a student who had been transported by a coyote into the U.S. and was reunited with his mother in the parking lot of a big-box store. I don’t remember whether this essay focused on specific skills or coping mechanisms that he gained from his ordeal. I remember only the bliss of the parent-and-child reunion in that uninspiring setting. If I were making a case to an admissions officer, I would suggest that simply being able to convey that experience demonstrates the kind of resilience that any college should admire.

The essays that have stayed with me over the years don’t follow a pattern. There are some narratives on very predictable topics — living up to the expectations of immigrant parents, or suffering from depression in 2020 — that are moving because of the attention with which the student describes the experience. One girl determined to become an engineer while watching her father build furniture from scraps after work; a boy, grieving for his mother during lockdown, began taking pictures of the sky.

If, as Lorrie Moore said, “a short story is a love affair; a novel is a marriage,” what is a college essay? Every once in a while I sit down next to a student and start reading, and I have to suppress my excitement, because there on the Google Doc in front of me is a real writer’s voice. One of the first students I ever worked with wrote about falling in love with another girl in dance class, the absolute magic of watching her move and the terror in the conflict between her feelings and the instruction of her religious middle school. She made me think that college essays are less like love than limerence: one-sided, obsessive, idiosyncratic but profound, the first draft of the most personal story their writers will ever tell.

Nell Freudenberger’s novel “The Limits” was published by Knopf last month. She volunteers through the PEN America Writers in the Schools program.

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May 14, 2024

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Giving lessons to your teenage self could boost your well-being, say researchers

by University of Surrey

Asking young adults to advise their younger selves could have a positive impact on their self-esteem, resilience and mental health, according to a new study from the University of Surrey published in Cogent Psychology .

Researchers used a unique "photograph prompted think-aloud" method on 42 people aged 20–24 years old, where they reflected aloud while looking at a photo of themselves from their mid-teens.

Many of the participants told their younger selves to be patient and embrace change and uncertainty. Others told themselves to let go of bad relationships and set clear boundaries in future interactions.

Professor Jane Ogden, co-author of the study from the School of Psychology at the University of Surrey, said, "In a world quick to categorize young adults as fragile, our study reveals that they are, in fact, deeply complex individuals trying to navigate a rapidly changing landscape, often under the constant scrutiny of online exposure.

"Our research provides a crucial roadmap for the journey from adolescence to adulthood—offering actionable guidance that can empower young adults to strengthen their social connections , solidify their personal identity , and bolster their emotional health.

"These insights are invaluable not only for the young people themselves but also for educators, counselors, and mental health professionals who support them, pinpointing key areas where focused support and guidance can make a significant difference."

By reflecting on their teenage years, participants learned three key lessons:

• Create a safe space: Participants reflected on the importance of choosing supportive friends and letting go of harmful relationships to protect their well-being. They also highlighted the need to set clear boundaries and stand up for themselves, which is essential for maintaining mental health and self-respect.
• Look around and take perspective: Participants urged their younger selves to broaden their outlook, understanding that everyone faces challenges and that they are not alone in their struggles. They also discovered the importance of valuing themselves for their actions and character rather than their appearance and resisting societal labels that try to define them.
• Look inwards and trust yourself: Participants emphasized the importance of listening to their intuition and taking care of their emotional needs while focusing on personal growth without comparing themselves to others. They learned to see both successes and failures as opportunities for growth, persevering through challenges and embracing each experience as part of their development.

Professor Ogden continued, "There is real scope to expand our research into this type of intervention to include a wider range of voices from diverse backgrounds. This could be crucial for understanding the unique paths of young adults ' development. Advocating for policies that embed these insights into educational and community programs will ensure more tailored and effective support for every young adult navigating the complexities of growth and change."

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Essay on Self Help is the Best Help for Students

We are Sharing an Essay on Essay on Self Help is the Best Help in English for students and children. In this article, we have tried our best to provide a short Essay on Self Help is the Best Help for Classes 5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12 in 100, 150, 300, 500 words.

Essay on Self Help in 150 words

God helps those who know how to help themselves. One cannot have success in life if he depends on others’ help. He must try hard and work hard to attain his goal. If he does not have confidence in his own ability, others cannot help him attain success in life. If only one is sincere in his labour and determined to attain his goal, he can earn success in life. So the key to success is in our own hands, not in the dependence on others. If we read the stories of success in our world, We can see how the most successful men have helped themselves. They are all self-made men, never depending on others, But that does not mean that they have worked alone in this world and that they have refused to take others’ help. They have accepted help from others but relied on themselves.

Essay on Self Help is the Best Help in 300 words

`Self-help is the best help’ is a popular proverb. This is not only a proverb but also the outcome of human experience. There are two types of help. One is self-help and the other one is the help rendered by others.

The idea of self-help was conceived by man in the very early stages of civilization. The primitive man depended on his own help for securing food and meeting his various needs. Man learned by experience that when he does something on his own he can do it better than when it is done by somebody else for him. As long as a person does his work on his own he is his own master. He derives satisfaction from having done something by his own efforts. When work is done for him by others this satisfaction will not be there. In the beginning, the man depended upon his self-help. But with the progress of civilization, a man began to live on other’s labour. This transformed the innocent primitive man into a cunning civilized man. Man became lazy and corrupt. In course of time, he even tried to enslave others for his selfish ends. Thus came into existence the cruel practice of slavery. Today, though slavery has been abolished we can find a large number of people who depend on others’ labour.

Self-help develops self-reliance and self-dependence. One feels confident of his capacity. He knows what to do and how to do things. He is not a parasite on others. The example set by Japan in this regard is worth mentioning. Japan is a country that is wedded to this principle and used it as a means of her progress. The result is that Japan became an advanced nation. So self-help is the root of all progress.

But this must not make us selfish and narrow-minded. When a man thinks of himself he must also think of others. Man is a social animal. He needs the help of others. He cannot produce each and everything needed by him by his self-efforts. Therefore while a person tries to be as self-reliant as possible he should not be blind to the needs of other people.

# Paragraph on Self Help is the Best Help

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In an increasingly digital world, it’s more important than ever for students to develop their handwriting skills

By Amra Pajalic

• X (formerly Twitter)

These days, students are often required to bring a device to school to access equitable education. But as they're increasingly using more and more technology, their handwriting is being affected. Some of you might wonder why this is an issue.

When we look at the assessment tools we use, such as end of semester tests or high school exams to allocate an ATAR for university entrance, students must undertake these in handwritten settings to authenticate their knowledge and learning.

These exams run for two to three hours and require students to produce written tasks under timed conditions. If examiners cannot read and assess a handwritten piece, this can affect scores, so handwriting legibility and stamina are crucial to ensure a student's success.

Messy and illegible handwriting has contributed to a surge in VCE students seeking special arrangements in exams, such as typing.

Another issue I've noticed cropping up due to an over-reliance on technology is the effect on grammar and punctuation, with students using online abbreviations within their responses and not knowing how to punctuate sentences correctly, thus affecting clarity of expression.

I also believe there are higher incidences of spelling mistakes because of an over-reliance on spellchecking software .

These days, in my year 9 English classes, students take notes and usually do all their homework on their computers, rarely needing to engage in handwriting. And it makes sense, because it's so convenient and easy.

But in doing so, students are missing out on many benefits of handwriting.

The benefits of handwriting

Studies have shown that handwriting supports better retention and recall of information.

A 2021 study investigating the cognitive effort of handwriting and typing found that "handwriting led to better recall than typing, particularly with the longest lists of words".

Research studies have also found that the process of handwriting, rather than typing, enhances memory and improves spelling skills.

Students who struggle with handwriting produce shorter pieces and a lower quality of content because they have less opportunity to think creatively. When students build up their handwriting fluency, it frees up their working memory and they can then instead spend more time thinking about how to plan and compose their texts.

This is something I've seen firsthand with students I teach. Students who struggle with handwriting experience a crisis of self-confidence and spend more time procrastinating than writing.

However, when they have the chance to practise a style of writing repeatedly, they develop muscle memory and can produce higher quality texts and manage their time more effectively.

These motor and cognitive benefits can lead to greater academic success.

While we might think that difficulty with handwriting and expression might not lead to long-term consequences beyond final exams and high school, we can't deny that people still use handwriting in various everyday tasks, such as filling out forms or making handwritten lists, which can be challenging if someone lacks handwriting skills.

Then there is the real possibility that it can affect professional communication. In fields where handwritten documentation, correspondence or notes are required, such as healthcare or legal professions, poor handwriting can lead to errors or misinterpretations.

Even in industries such as retail or hospitality, there is the need to handwrite signs; label stock or inventory; or produce menus. Spelling mistakes and punctuation errors can lead to low consumer confidence.

How to build children's confidence with handwriting

So how do we balance out the use of technology to support students' handwriting practice?

Parents can support their children by creating opportunities for practice at home. Start by providing handwriting tools — notebooks, pencils and erasers — and consider seeking help if your child is struggling significantly, whether from a teacher, occupational therapist or professionals who specialise in handwriting development.

As a parent, I praised my daughter's efforts in writing stories, or when she penned sweet notes to me and her father when she was angling for us to buy her something, or her forays into journaling and daily organisers.

Teachers can create different learning experiences through collaboration, games or note-making to develop students' handwriting and stamina.

As an English teacher, I used the method of the Writer's Notebook , a tried-and-true method that educators have successfully used for decades.

Teachers integrate these Writer Notebooks into the curriculum at least once a week, using them to teach and practice sentence construction and long-form pieces. These notebooks are used to demonstrate the practice of skills and the development of writing a piece.

My students' first activity of the year is always a letter to the teacher.

First, I write them a letter telling them about myself, my cultural background, the origin or story of my name, my passions and my goals, and they then write a letter to me modelling the same structure.

These letters serve a two-fold purpose. They allow me to develop a rapport with students by getting to know them on a personal level, and they help me identify their writing strengths and areas of development so I can include a goal-setting report in my reply.

As a teacher, I've had the experience of using Writer Notebooks for five years now and can unequivocally testify to their efficacy. I love sharing these at parent-teacher interviews and being able to show the progression from the beginning of the year to the end.

And most importantly, I love seeing the confidence that students themselves display in being able to write under timed conditions and having the writing stamina for exam conditions. Amra Pajalic is a teacher of 11 years. She is an award-winning author of Sabiha's Dilemma, Alma's Loyalty and Jesse's Triumph, the first three books in her own-voices young adult Sassy Saints Series.

Writing memoir can help young people with their self-expression and self-worth

BTN: Write or type, that is the question!

Cursive handwriting

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‘the sound of a severing soul’: local student self-publishes poetry book.

Pictured is the cover of local student JRM’s new book, “The Sound of a Severing Soul.” PHOTO PROVIDED

LOCK HAVEN — A local student, writing under the pseudonym JRM, has recently self published a poetry book written from the heart titled “The Sound of a Severing Soul.”

The book is centered around healing through trauma the author has experienced, and JRM hopes to help those who can relate to their experiences with their poetry.

The descriptor for the book on Amazon states, “I’m only 15 but I always felt things very strongly. When I began to feel more, I began to write. Writing helped me in so many ways and now I hope it can help you. This book is a trip into the mind of someone who’s been hurt, and of someone who’s begun to heal.”

A few of the poems are titled, “What Difference Does it Make,” “Feelings I Just Can’t Flick,” and “Everything But You.”

“This poem book depicts my journey through the pain I felt in my life, and how I found pen and paper to be my savior in the times when I had no one to hear me. I hope that my poetry will be your savior, too, just like it helped me through the difficult phase in my life, and help you heal and do the things you’ve always desired to do,” the description continues.

Though they prefer to remain anonymous, JRM has taken the initiative to publish their works in an attempt to get through to people in their community and beyond.

“I think people don’t really realize healing takes time. A lot of people are scared to ask for help, and that’s definitely one of the things I tried to emphasize. I think people think that asking for help is giving up but it’s not, it’s refusing to give up,” said JRM.

They have been writing for around a year, and according to them, once they got started the poems practically wrote themselves.

“Writing really helped me get all (my feelings) out. I hit a tough spot in life… Writing kind of helped me out of that. When I started reading my poetry to my friends and family I realized there’s a lot of people who can relate to what I’m going through,” said JRM.

According to their mother, the poetry appeals to people of any age or background.

“The feedback we’ve been getting from those who bought the book… It’s almost like a tool to help them deal with a narcissistic personality,” said their mother.

“I thought it would be relatable for people. I wanted to reach people and let them know they’re not alone in things — so they know what they’re feeling isn’t foolish or irrelevant. Teens, young adults, older people. Everyone goes through heartache,” said JRM.

Their biggest supporters through this process were their mother, their grandparents and their best friend.

To fellow students who aspire to write, JRM’s advice is to just jump in.

“Go for it. It’s kind of scary and nerve wracking — (wondering if) it’s actually good or if the people I love are just saying it to feed into me. I definitely think it’s something you should go for — don’t second guess it. You can’t test the waters with it, just jump into it,” said JRM.

JRM noted they might write another poetry book in the future, but also has plans to write a chapter book published under the same pseudonym.

They also have an instagram page, @j.r.mpoetry, where they post quotes they come up with on their own.

The book was independently published in mid-April, and includes around 21 poems across 34 pages; it can be purchased on Amazon for $13.

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