steps to writing a best man speech

How to Write a Best Man Speech in 9 Simple Steps

Been tasked to write a best man speech and not sure where to start? Follow these easy rules for how to write a best man speech—and how to deliver it like a total pro.

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Being enlisted as someone's best man is a big deal, and there are plenty of  best man duties  involved—including figuring out how to write a best man speech. Yes, it’s tradition for the best man to give a wedding speech during the reception, so it’s time to prep for that responsibility. If you’re feeling a little nervous about giving a toast in front of a crowd, that’s totally normal, especially if public speaking isn’t your forte. But with a little forethought, planning, and a lot of practice, you’ll be wowing everyone with your best man speech in no time. Here are nine steps to writing a short best man speech that's sweet and to the point—and how you can ace the delivery. 

How to Write a Great Best Man Speech

Follow this best man speech template to easily get started when it's time to write your own wedding toast. 

1. Plan out your best man speech ahead of time.

Presuming you’re not reading this the night before the wedding, you should give yourself plenty of time—at least one month—to write your best man speech. The weeks leading up to the wedding day, especially participating as such a crucial part of the wedding party, can become hectic. With all of the events you’ll be encouraged or required to attend (on top of keeping up with your own personal life), you may very well lose sight of time. It’s better to plan ahead so you relieve some of the pressure when it's time to write an awesome best man speech.

2. Start your best man speech by expressing gratitude.

If you’re wondering how to write a best man speech, we recommend beginning the speech by stepping onto the dance floor and saying good evening to the crowd (you can write this as a note at the top of your speech as a reminder in case you get nervous). The opening line of your speech should introduce yourself as the best man and then express gratitude to those you think deserve a special shout out. Thank the couple’s parents for raising such great people, thank your friend for having you here, thank the guests for coming, and maybe throw in a one-liner thanking the bartender for a few laughs. It’s a low-key way to break the ice, ease yourself into the best man speech, and make sure those who deserve thanks feel appreciated.

3. Then, talk about your relationship with the groom.

Beyond introducing your name, a big part of how to write a best man speech is talking about your relationship with the groom. Talk about how you met him, how long you've known each other, and what kind of great friend he is. If you can think of an anecdote or funny story that really sums up the kind of person he is, whether that’s charming, warm-hearted, or thoughtful, use it. A funny best man speech is always memorable, but if you’re going to use an anecdote, linking that story to his partner when possible will make it even more meaningful. For example, maybe he’s incredibly outgoing but forgetful, while his new spouse is more thoughtful and organized. If you start with an anecdote of his forgetfulness and later follow up with a time you saw his partner’s organizational skills help him out big time—and that’s a moment you knew they were the real deal—that’s a perfect icebreaker.

4. Focus on the couple's relationship, and not just your own.

Presuming you’ve known the groom for longer than he’s know his partner, you can definitely start your best man toast by sharing an inside joke and recalling the earlier times in your friendship, but then you should skip ahead to when he met his partner. Think of a story that epitomizes their relationship. If you can talk about the exact moment when you realized his partner was “The One” for him, include that. Maybe your buddy told you one week after meeting his partner that they were going to get married, and you thought he was absolutely bonkers, but here you are. Maybe you’ve known the groom for a long, long time—for example, if you’re his brother or you've been best friends since elementary school. You’ve probably always had an idea of what his perfect partner would look like, but the one sitting in front of you exceeds all expectations. Emphasize that he's a great guy and how happy you are for your pal that he’s found someone so perfect for him.

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5. Keep your best man speech short and sweet.

In terms of  wedding speech order , the best man speech is typically first, followed by the  maid of honor's toast  and parent speeches or  father-of-the-bride-speech . Even though you'll go first, a good best man speech is short and sweet, since you want to avoid people growing restless during the later speeches (guests are ready to eat, drink, and dance at this point of the wedding reception). Aim for a short best man speech between three and five minutes max. Keep in mind that it will feel much shorter to you when you’re actually giving the speech, and you will likely rush through it a little bit in the spotlight. That’s why you must…

7. Practice, practice, practice.

One of the most crucial best man speech tips is that you have to—and we mean  have to— practice your speech  before the wedding. You should read it to yourself out loud at least three or four times ahead of the actual reception. It might feel awkward at first, but would you rather fumble your words alone in private with the chance to make improvements, or give your speech for the first time while being watched by dozens of people with camera phones? Record yourself giving the speech, then replay it for mistakes and things to change. Not only is practice critical to giving the best performance, but it will give you a confidence boost when the big moment arrives. Consider sending the video to a friend, other groomsmen, or relative to give you honest feedback.

7. Write it down.

You should try to memorize your best man toast as best you can, but you’ll feel less anxious if you have it written down. Practice your speech enough so you won’t need to stare at the piece of paper the entire time, but jot down the main talking points to easily transition from one part to the next. Consider using notecards or a small notepad—remember that there's going to be professional photography and videography of your best man speech. Reading from a haphazardly torn piece of scrap paper or worse, your hand, will look sloppy and indicate that you didn’t prepare for the speech.

8. Don’t drink beforehand.

Keep your alcohol intake to a minimum until after you’re finished delivering the best man speech. It's normal to want to calm your nerves, but anything more than one drink during cocktail hour could backfire—alcohol paired with intense nerves and emotions will only amplify them (and you run the risk of slurring your speech!). The more you drink, the less likely you'll be able to remember what you've planned and form cohesive thoughts in the spotlight. Once your speech is over, you'll have time to celebrate all you want. 

9. Finish your best man speech with congratulations and a toast.

This is a foolproof way to end your best man speech. Conclude by congratulating the happy couple on their big day and offer a toast to their lifetime of happiness. The toast can be personal, witty, or a quote. Perhaps there’s a line about love and relationships from one of the groom’s favorite comedians or movies that you can share, or you can simply wish the newlyweds the best and ask your fellow guests to raise their glasses in celebration. 

Things to Avoid In a Best Man Speech

In order to write a good speech, you want to keep the focus off yourself and instead on the happy couple and their future. In general, it's best to steer clear of these things:

1. Inappropriate anecdotes. 

Your pal's grandmother definitely does not need to hear about that one infamous night in college, no matter how relevant or funny it might seem to your buddies. Leave those drunken tales and embarrassing stories for the bachelor party and keep your best man speech PG.

2. Any talk of exes.

Your friend's wedding is absolutely not the time to bring up ex-girlfriends or previous relationships. No matter a how good a story you think it is, or even if it leads directly to the moment you're all in now, just leave it out completely—trust us.

3. Foul language.

Sensing a theme here? You want to make sure your best man speech is well received by everyone, from the 80-year-old guests to the 8-year-old guests. Remember: A wedding is a family event, so it's best to leave out any profanity or other PG-13 talk. 

4. Long-winded stories.

As mentioned previously, you want to keep your best man speech short and sweet. As great as your speech is going to be, the last thing you want is for the wedding guests to tune out halfway through your time in the spotlight. If a story needs more than a few sentences to explain, either pare it down or consider a different approach for writing your best man speech.

Related WeddingWire Articles

Rock Your Best Man Speech Using Our Expert-Approved Advice

• Chapelle writes articles for The Knot Worldwide. She covers all things wedding-related and has a personal interest in covering celebrity engagements and fashion.
• Before joining The Knot Worldwide, Chapelle was an editorial intern for Subvrt Magazine.
• Chapelle has a degree in English writing from Loyola University New Orleans.

Pat yourself on the back—you're the best man. It's a good feeling when one of your loved ones asks you to be their right hand for the wedding. Beyond the fun best man duties , like planning an epic bach party , you'll have to give a rousing best man speech. We believe it's arguably the most meaningful duty, but don't let that get you nervous. Whether you're a public speaking pro or have only delivered speeches while on the eighth-grade debate team, boost your chances of making your best man speech a hit by using our helpful tips, ideas and examples for inspiration.

In this article:

Printable Template | How to Write | Examples | Tips | FAQs

Printable Best Man Speech Template

Delivering a best man wedding speech doesn't have to feel like a chore. Use the template below as a checklist while you're writing your best man speech.

How to Write a Best Man Speech Outline

We're guessing the thought of crafting a flawless best man speech from scratch feels pretty overwhelming right about now. Start by drafting a bare-bones outline (trust us, drawing up a rough outline is way more palatable than writing a fully fleshed-out speech). You don't need to include every element in your wedding speech . Instead, customize it to fit the couple, the event and your relationship with the groom.

1. Have a killer opening line.

Successful best man speeches always start with a good opener. Introduce yourself and explain your connection to the happy couple. Have fun with this part by sharing a quick joke or quoting a poem so your speech doesn't start off stale. For example, "Hello everyone! For those of you who don't know me, thank you so much for coming to my wedding. [pause for laughter] Sorry about that...I'm a little nervous."

2. Thank the other speakers.

Once you address the audience, give props to the previous speaker to help lead into your speech. If you know your speech has a sillier sentiment, now's your chance to warn your audience in the change of direction. Here's an example: "Let's give it up to the amazing speech given by the wonderful maid of honor . If you enjoyed how thoughtful and sweet her speech was, you better get the tissues ready for this one!"

Next, express your gratitude to the couple's parents. Thank the couples' parents for not only raising incredible adults and, if they helped pay for the wedding, for hosting such a great party. Here's an example: "I'd like to begin by expressing my deepest gratitude to the couples' parents for raising such amazing people, who I'm fortunate to call my best friends. I would also like to thank their parents for hosting such an awesome celebration for all of us to enjoy this evening."

3. Say a few words about your friend's new spouse.

Another writing a best man speech tip is always to give a special shoutout to the new spouse so they feel welcomed and included. Yes, we know you most likely have a closer relationship with the groom, but don't let that stop you from showering them with kind words––it's their big day too. Talk about the qualities you like about them and why you love them in the groom's life. Try this, "I'm so happy [Spouse's Name] fell in love with [Groom's Name]. Firsthand I've seen the grace, intelligence and confidence [Spouse's Name] has, which explains why [Groom's Name] knew he wanted to marry [Spouse's Name] after their first date."

4. Share personal stories.

What's going to make your best man speech stand out are personal stories. We suggest adding one or two anecdotes, like your favorite memories with the groom (and their partner, if you want). Avoid choosing a story that rambles on and has no sentimental or funny ending—keep it lighthearted and short. Here's a silly example, "I remember when we first met in first grade. [Groom's Name] had just glued his hand to his face but still used his free one to shake my hand and ask if I wanted to be his friend."

5. Talk about the couple's relationship.

This is the time to speak about why the groom and their new spouse are a great couple. Share how they first met and how their relationship has grown so other guests can get a better insight into the newlyweds. If you helped the love birds meet, say something like this in your best man speech: "I know I said earlier I'm the best man, but I lied. I'm actually Cupid because I'm the one who introduced these two eight years ago."

6. Propose a toast.

Finally, close out your best man speech with a heartfelt toast. Ask everyone to raise a glass and provide well wishes to the newly married couple. Steal this wedding toast : "Everyone, please join me in raising a glass to such a wonderful couple. I wish you a lifetime of peace, love and happiness. Love you guys!"

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Best man speech examples.

Now that you know how to write the outline, let us provide you with some inspiration. Here are four best man speech ideas for every type of delivery.

Short Best Man Speech Example

Short best man speeches can make the grade just as much as long ones. Try this short but sweet example.

As the poet, Dante once said, 'A great flame follows a little spark.' When [Groom's Name] met [Spouse's Name], there was a little spark. I know because I talked to him the next day.

From the way he talked about [Spouse's Name], this stranger he chatted up at a Halloween party, I could tell this spark was something special.

You two are fantastic together. May the flame burn long, and may sparks continue to fly. Cheers to the newlyweds!

Funny Best Man Speech Example

Funny best man speeches are our favorite. You get to show off your comedic skills while giving loving well-wishes to the happy couple.

Hello! For those who don't know me, I'm [Your Name], the best man. I've known [Groom's Name] since middle school, which means that it was before we learned mullets weren't a good look for either of us.

[Groom's Name] and [Spouse's Name] told me there are some topics I should avoid in this speech so…[Look through cue cards, then shake head and dramatically drop them all to the floor but one.]

[Reading from the remaining cue card] [Groom's Name] is really the best friend I've ever had. He's done so many wonderful things it would be difficult to name them all. Hey, [a Groomsman's Name], I can't read your handwriting here!

But seriously, it's all true. This guy is a great friend, the best I've got, and I'm very proud to stand by his side today.

[Spouse's Name], I was hoping to be the best-looking person in the room today but obviously, I failed miserably. You look beautiful and radiant. I'm beyond happy for the two of you.

May you always find joy in the little things, like your Xbox and 'Star Wars.' Oh wait, that's my personal goal. You should actually find joy in each other, and do everything you can to have a lifetime of happiness together. Let's toast the newlyweds!

Best Man Speech for Brother Example

Need best man speech examples for your brother? Use our speech below as a guide to delivering a sweet message to your older or younger brother.

On my fourth birthday, my parents got me a brother…I wanted a puppy.

But seriously, as a kid [Groom's Name] wanted to do everything I did. He used to follow me around. He used to sneak into my room and play with my Matchbox cars. Our parents could get him to eat his broccoli by making me eat my broccoli.

It wasn't until after I went to college that he started going down his own path. He started doing volunteer work. He found a job he loves, a pretty killer apartment and, of course, he found [Spouse's Name].

[Spouse's Name], you're the nicest person I've ever met, and my brother is so blessed to have someone like you in his life. Thank you for being there for him.

I'm so happy you two found each other especially because I'm gaining a sister today. Oh, and I want to set the record straight. I'm glad I didn't get a puppy that day. I love you, little bro.

Congratulations to both of you. I wish you lots of laughter, love and joy as a married couple. Cheers to the newlyweds!

Best Man Speech for Best Friend Example

For those who need a best man speech sample for their best friend, we got you covered. Here's how to tell your BFF you're happy for them on their special day.

Good evening, everyone! I'm [Your Name], and I'm extremely honored to call myself [Groom's Name]'s best man. Also, please excuse the puffiness under my eyes, I've been happy crying since before the ceremony.

I first met [Groom's Name] while working at a pizza joint called Domenica's while in college. I hated being a server with all my heart, but whenever [Groom's Name] and I were scheduled together, it made it so much more bearable.

We laughed until we cried, ate hundreds of garlic knots and I can't tell you the amount of times we accidentally got pizza dough stuck to the ceiling during our pizza toss competitions. But even after we both quit and moved on to bigger and better things, we still kept in touch and I'm eternally grateful.

One of those bigger and better things was [Spouse's Name]. [Groom's Name] really discovered the perfect piece to his puzzle. [Spouse's Name] laughs at his bad jokes, listens to his long monologues about Batman vs. Superman and most importantly, loves him no matter what. [Spouse's Name] is a phenomenal and caring person who deserves the world, and I know [Groom's Name] will do everything he can to give it to them.

Thank you both for allowing me to be a part of your beautiful wedding, and I can't wait to see what else is in store for you in the future. Love you guys, and cheers to the handsome couple!

Best Man Speech Tips

Good news! We got how to give a best man speech tips from Dominic Bliss, wedding writer and author of Being the Best Man for Dummies. Study up on these helpful pointers below to minimize pre-speech jitters and ensure a smooth delivery.

Plan ahead.

The first tip in our guide on how to write a best man speech is to get started in advance. (As in, do not procrastinate.) "Start writing a best man speech at least two months before the wedding," Bliss says. "As the wedding nears, there are lots of events—suit fittings and a coed shower, perhaps—that could distract you from getting your writing done." Brainstorm and write down any stories, jokes or best man speech quotes you want to include. The more time you have to prepare your best man speech, the better. This way, you'll be able to be fully present at upcoming wedding festivities.

Be genuine.

Whether the wedding guests are strangers or family, it can feel nerve-racking to deliver your best man speech with all eyes on you. To ease the awkwardness, provide anecdotes and stories about your relationship with the couple. Everyone loves a bit of nostalgia, and the guests get to know you better.

With that said, stay true to how you normally act while making your speech. There's no need for you to change who you are for some made-up public speaking persona. If you feel more comfortable cracking jokes throughout your speech, do it. If you are better at being sentimental and don't mind leaving everyone misty-eyed, take that approach. Remember, the couple chose you to speak at their wedding because they felt you could add something special to their big day. As long as you deliver a heartfelt speech, the newlyweds and guests will love it.

Know what topics to avoid.

There are a few topics to omit from the best man speech. No matter how funny you (and even the groom) might think they are, someone is bound to be offended or put off if you mention:

• Negativity about marriage in general.
• Past relationships.
• Previous marriages/divorces.
• Drinking, drugs, gambling.
• "Adult" humor or any other mention of sex.

After all, your best man speech should celebrate the newlywed couple and their love rather than causing future friction. Keep it PG.

Consider adding jokes.

If you want to deliver a funny best man speech, consider poking some fun at the groom. "Every groom will have some funny characteristic or quirk you can ridicule," Bliss notes. "As long as it's something everyone can appreciate, it's sure to get a laugh. Avoid obscure references or inside jokes. You want older guests and those who don't know him well to see the funny side too." Be strategic about your jokes too. You can make jokes about the groom but leave their new spouse alone.

Write it down.

Even those with a great memory will feel more confident with a written speech or at least a few bullet points to keep them on track. Nerves can mess with your memory, so don't think you're a failure if you have to bring notes with you. (Even CEOs do this at corporate events.) Bliss suggests using small note cards instead of a sheet of paper since they "won't flap around."

And yes we know many groomsmen will want to read off their cell phones out of convenience, but wedding planners recommend against it. The lighting from your phone screen can ruin the wedding photographer's photos and can be distracting to guests. Practice writing down your speech instead—it's quite soothing.

Practice with an audience.

This tip is a must when it comes to writing a best man speech. Even if you think you have this whole thing in the bag, practice delivering your wedding speech aloud at least three times. When you're by yourself, take a video and watch the playback to get a feel for how your speech is going. (Do you say "um" between every sentence? Are your gestures a little robotic?) If your friends can't offer critiques in person, "send [the video] to a close friend who won't be going to the wedding and who can give you honest feedback," Bliss recommends.

Finally: don't mumble. A great best man speech becomes boring if it's monotonous or guests are straining to hear you. Speak confidently and slowly.

Best Man Frequently Asked Questions

If this is your first time giving a best man speech, you might have a lot of questions. Here are answers to the top wedding speech inquiries.

How Long Should a Best Man Speech Be?

In general, the best man speech length should be at least three minutes, but no more than five minutes. This is enough time to say something meaningful before guests get too antsy. Of course, you should adjust your speech length to the event. If you're speaking at a last-minute wedding, it might require a brief speech, while a formal affair could call for a longer toast. But you might also be wondering, "how many words should a best man speech be?" We suggest between 700 to 1000 words.

How to Start a Best Man Speech

Begin your speech by addressing the audience and thanking them for attending the wedding. Here's an example, "Hello, everyone. On behalf of the newlyweds, I want to thank everyone for attending this amazing celebration." You can even butter up the crowd by saying how lovely everyone looks this evening. Then, introduce yourself and how you know the groom or couple. This is a great opportunity to add a funny story or memory you have with them that can lead you into the rest of your speech.

How to End a Best Man Speech

Raise your glass and offer a toast wishing the couple a lifetime of happiness, excellent health and success. Your toast can include one final joke or be a marriage quote from your and the groom's favorite movie. Either way, take this chance to sincerely express the newlyweds well. Remember, concluding the speech is the easiest part.

Does the Best Man Have to Give a Speech?

It's not required, but it's expected that the best man gives a speech—especially if the other honor attendants are giving one. If speaking in public makes your stomach turn, consider showing your appreciation for the couple in a different way. We've seen best men do upbeat choreography, sing the couple's favorite song or even present a wedding video they made.

When Does the Best Man Give His Speech?

Following the traditional wedding speech order , the best man speaks after the maid of honor and is the last speech during the reception. There's no need to use this itinerary since the speech order depends on your reception timeline and wedding party size. The to-be-weds might even ask you to deliver your speech during the rehearsal dinner, which most likely will be in front of a smaller audience (score!). Before the wedding and during, double-check with the couple to ensure you know when to give your best man speech so no one has to hunt you down when it's your turn.

Amazing Tips & Themes For Your Magical Wedding

• Magical Words

The Ultimate Best Man Speech Guide (Examples And Templates Included)

• Posted by by Lisa Plaitt

Being picked to be the best man is such a great honor. You will feel blessed that the groom has thought of you, and considers you the best man and friend for the job.

But, as the wedding draws nearer, there’s one thing on your mind. No, it’s not the bachelor party… It’s the best man’s speech(see also: Best Ways to End Your Best Man’s Speech ). 

As the best man, you will likely have many responsibilities in the run up towards the wedding. You’ll have to try on suits, organize the bachelor party, but the best man speech is the thing that most look forward to, or dread!

Standing up in front of many guests, some of which you may not have met before can be nerve wracking to say the least. It’s such an important task, and a part of the wedding that many guests look forward to. 

A best man speech needs to hook the audience in, reveal some funny stories about the groom, and even the bride, but also wish the couple well, and spread some laughter amongst the audience.

But, you have to do all of this in one single speech that can’t be too long, and can’t be too short! 

So, how can you nail the best man speech? Well, that’s where we come in handy. We can offer you this ultimate guide to creating a best man speech, including tips, structure and examples you can take inspiration from. 

How To Structure A Best Man Speech

Not everyone is gifted with the ability to speak clearly and confidently to a crowd. It can be very nerve racking, and make you anxious to say the least.

If you’re unsure of how to go about planning your best man speech, then we can help you out with this simple structure to follow and keep yourself on track. 

This structure is a sort of guide, you don’t have to use it, but it’s a good idea to follow the structure so you cover all bases when doing the speech.

It can also help you when actually performing the speech, as you’ll know what needs to come next and in which order to go over your stories and anecdotes.

A good best man speech begins with:

• An Introduction

Use the introduction to introduce yourself to the crowd. Not everyone will know who you are in the wedding, so it’s a nice way to break the ice and get rid of any awkwardness.

Try introducing yourself with a funny one liner about who you are and how you know the happy couple.

• Talk About How You Met/Know The Groom

Next, it’s a good idea to briefly cover how you met the groom, or how long you’ve known each other. You can give a little history of how far back you go, and mention how honored you are to be the best man. 

• Anecdotes About The Groom

Here comes the fun part! Now is the time to start telling a funny story about the groom. The emphasis here is on funny and not too embarrassing or gross. Choose two or three short anecdotes or stories, but don’t overdo it. 

• Balance Poking Fun With Sincerity

After you’ve had your fun, balance this out by saying something meaningful and sincere about the groom, his qualities or your friendship. 

• Briefly Talk About How You Know The Bride

In this section, you can talk about your first meeting with the bride, how she came into the groom’s life, and how great of a match you believe them to be. 

• Wish Them All The Best

Finally, wish the couple all the best for their future together with a sincere, caring comment. Then, toast to the happy couple! 

Best Man Speech Do’s And Don’ts

There are definitely a few do’s and don’ts when it comes to speaking at someone’s wedding. You’ll want to keep it concise, funny, but not too over the top jokey. Here’s our recommendations of what to do, and what not to do. 

First things first, you’ll want to plan ahead, and write a few stories and anecdotes down that you can remember. Do this for a few weeks before the wedding, so it gives you time to come up with the right memories to share. 

Try brainstorming ideas with other members of the family or bridal party to come up with the best things to share about the groom and his bride. Then, you can narrow down the list and find the most impactful or most important things to talk about.

You should also consider who this speech is going to be said around.

If the groom’s very traditional great aunt or grandma is there, it could be a good idea to avoid any crass, rude stories that could make family members uncomfortable. Save those lines for the bachelor party! 

Do pause for reactions. You don’t want to talk too fast or fly through the speech as those who have laughed at the last line may miss the next one. Always leave small gaps or pauses for reactions, applause or responses. 

Finally, make sure you focus on the couple, not just the groom.

This day is about the two of them. While you are doing a speech because you are the best man to the groom, it is important that you bring in the bride/partner in your speech so that overall you are wishing both of them well on their new adventure. 

What Not To Do

Don’t wing it! You may have some liquid courage on the night, but you need this speech to be a crowd pleaser, so be sure to take your notes and go over the speech in your head just before you have to do it. 

Don’t use foul language, or inflammatory language. You don’t want to cause a dark cloud over the event by offending anyone or causing a scene.

The same goes for mentioning exes (who could well be at the wedding) or bringing up sore subjects during the speech. Keep it fun, lighthearted, and hilarious. 

Don’t use cliches like The groom is like a brother to me. Instead, demonstrate your close bond by telling a story or giving an example of when he treated you like family, and made you feel welcome.

This is far more impactful and will really get the audience involved in your speech. 

Finally, and this is an important one- don’t make it about you. This is not your shining moment, your time will come.

Ensure you’re not talking about yourself too much, and always bringing it back to the bride and groom, because that’s what the audience really wants to hear about.

It’s a chance for them to see the couple in a different light, from your perspective, not learn everything about you. 

Tips For Writing A Best Man Speech

We’ve also got some brief tips for writing and performing your best man speech!

• Practice before the actual speech
• Don’t include inside jokes- they will fall on deaf ears
• Keep it short and sweet – don’t go over the top with long stories/memories
• Don’t use cringey cliches
• Don’t mention exes- even as a joke
• Use clean language
• Don’t say anything political/inflammatory
• Tell a story about the groom and the couple as a pair
• Don’t just focus on the groom
• Always end on a high – make a nice toast and comment about the couple

Qualities To Talk About In The Best Man Speech

Throughout your speech, it is important to keep a running theme. If the joke you are telling is unrelated, it won’t have as much drive and impact.

For instance, if you’re talking about the groom’s thoughtfulness, use funny anecdotes that relate to this, and bring it back to that whenever possible.

Here are some other qualities that are worth mentioning:

• Sense of humor: If the groom is known for his quick wit and humor, be sure to incorporate this into your speech. Share a funny story or two that showcases his sense of humor and make the guests laugh.
• Generosity: If the groom is known for his kindness and generosity, talk about a specific instance where he went out of his way to help someone in need. This will show the guests the type of person he truly is.
• Loyalty: Mention the groom’s unwavering loyalty to his friends and family. Talk about how he has been there for you and others in the past and how this trait is so important in a relationship.
• Intelligence: If the groom is intelligent and knowledgeable, highlight this in your speech. Talk about his impressive achievements or interests that show his intelligence and passion.
• Adventure: If the groom is someone who is always up for a new adventure, talk about his love for travel or exploring new things. This will show the guests his spontaneous and adventurous side.

For example, you could say:

Where do I begin with the groom’s sharp sense of humor? He’s a true master of wit, who can leave even the most experienced comedian in awe. A particularly memorable instance was when him and his bride went on a picnic; after he inadvertently dropped their sandwiches into a nearby pond, he remarked ‘Well, it looks like we’re having fish sandwiches today!’. The bride couldn’t help but laugh out loud at how quickly he turned an unfortunate situation into something humorous – that is simply the type of person this groom is. 

Groom has always had a very caring, loving nature. He would do anything for anyone. Except that one time I asked him to water my plants while I was on vacation. He brought all of the guys over to ‘water my plants’! Thanks for that, Groom. Just kidding, Groom is incredibly thoughtful and compassionate towards all who meet him, which is a quality I believe brought him closer to Bride. 

You want to talk about his great qualities, poke a little fun, or share a funny story, but then talk about how these qualities have translated into his relationship with his partner, or how they have brought them closer together. 

Best Man Speech Examples

Good evening everyone. For those of you who don’t know me, I’m Tom, younger brother and best man of the groom. For those of you that do know me…heeeeeeey! 

I have known Jack for…X years now (your age) and have always looked up to him. He had it all, the career, the intelligence, the sense of humor, and now the girl. Then again, I got the good looks. 

In all seriousness, I have always looked up to my big brother. He’s always had a flair for sports, and genuinely has a heart of gold.

Being the youngest of the two of us, Jack has made me a better man, mainly because of the character building he put me through as a child. Jack would love taunting me by stealing my favorite stuffed animals. 

I cherished my favorite, Mr. Snuggles, until one day Jack told me to come downstairs and see the new toy that our Rottweiler had been given.

I was so excited to see our little furry boy happy and playing with his toy until I realized that Jack had offered up Mr. Snuggles in sacrifice with a huge grin on his face. It was a day I won’t forget. 

Despite the taunting and the terrorizing, Jack has been the man that I’ve always aspired to be. In all of the years I’ve been around Jack, he’s always been tenacious and worked hard for what he wants. And he’s always gotten it.

After asking Jenny out the first time, and she said no , he didn’t give up. He knew she was the one for him! It’s a good thing he has the patience of a saint, as it took another 3 attempts to get the first date! 

With Jack being the older, but not often the wiser brother, he managed to get himself into some mishaps in the past.

When he did finally get a chance to take Jenny out on a date, he turned up at the wrong house, and managed to slip and break his shoulder all in one fantastic, first meeting with the parents.

Smoooth, brother. At least he made it an unforgettable start to their journey together. 

With Jenny at his side, Jack’s clumsy mishaps are less and less. You truly bring out the best in him, Jen. I would say welcome to the family, but you’ve been a part of our lives for some time already, and I am truly blessed to be able to call you my new sister. 

From day one, you’ve fit right in, as you too have taken on the role of teasing Jack just as I wanted. Let me tell you guys, there have been many pranks that Jenny and I have pulled off on Jack.

One time, we hid all of his left shoes, until the confusion nearly drove him to madness…and he had to deliver his board meeting like some kind of two right footed lunatic. 

Other times, we’ve hidden around the house just when Jack is coming home from a long day at the office, to ambush him with Nerf guns until he pleads for mercy! Let’s just say justice has been served for Mr. Snuggles. 

I quickly realized that Jenny and Jack were cut from the same mold. You two are a real example of what it means to marry your best friend, and I can’t wait to see what the future holds for the two of you.

So everyone, if you could raise your glass…and toast- to the bride and groom! 

Hi everyone! For those of you who don’t know me already, I am Zach, the best man of James! When James asked me to be the best man I felt like it was such an honor.

Then he reminded me that it’s not just about organizing the bachelor party and I have to actually come to the wedding so…here I am. 

I’ve known James for so many years now, having met him at high school. In those years, it’s become clear what a fantastic friend he is. He’s handsome, kind, brilliant, funny…and sorry (looks at Groom) mate I can’t read your handwriting here. I’ll just wing it. 

Just kidding. Me and James have been through thick and thin. I’ve watched him go from a weedy, awkward teenager to a less weedy, awkward adult!

Britney would probably argue with me over the adult part! James has always had that boyish sense of humor that’s often gotten us into trouble over the years. 

I remember James would always be the class clown in high school. But for some reason, it was always me getting in trouble. One day, I glanced over in class to see James scribbling away on his desk.

He’s probably carving out some obscenity in the wood I thought.

This is why it came as such a shock when later that day it was I who was called into the principal’s office, and as I walked with my head hung in shame to my fate, James smiled wide and proudly.

Little did I know it was my name he had carved into the wood, so I could sit in detention after class!   

Ever since that day, James and I have been at war with one another to get the other one back! But deep down, I know that James would do anything for me. If I needed someone at 4am, James is that friend.

Despite our differences, I know he’s as good as family to me, and all of the Henderson’s have welcomed me into their home on many occasions, and now Britney gets to have that same privilege. 

Britney brings out the absolute best in James, and has given us an incredible gift in bringing two wonderful boys into our lives. With Britney, James gets someone who is beautiful, smart, caring, and Britney…well, you get James. 

In all seriousness, if Britney gets half as much joy in being married to James, that I have had in being his friend over the years, then she will be incredibly lucky indeed. 

On behalf of all the groomsmen, bridesmaids and myself, I would like to thank James and Britney for having us be a part of their special day. I know how hard you’ve worked to make this a day to remember, and you’ve definitely succeeded. 

I wish you both all of the happiness, joy and good luck in the world, as you take these steps towards your future together. To the bride and groom, everyone! (Cheers). 

Hello everyone. My name is Joe and I’d just like to thank John for finally confirming that I am in fact – the best man, after 20 years of friendship. 20 years is a long time.

Just think, back then…Low rise jeans were in fashion, Spiderman was the favorite superhero, and Ben Affleck and J-Lo were together. So really, nothing has changed in 20 years, and the same goes for our friendship. 

If I ever needed building up, or bringing back down to earth, John was the man to do it. He’s always been there for me, through thick and thin. And let’s face it…during the college years, we were more thick than thin!

But, we had each other’s backs no matter what.

I remember one time in college, we decided that reading books and writing our own essays just wasn’t for us anymore. We decided to pay someone to write us an essay, and we would switch it up to pass the class.

From that day on a keen businessman was born- be careful everyone- you’ll probably get a bill for your food! 

It all would have gone swimmingly if John hadn’t forgotten to change the name on the essay, but he never took me down with him!

Since then, I’ve realized what a tenacious person, good friend and loyal individual John was, and it’s an absolute blessing to be up here with you tonight as your best man. 

There is one very important person who is not sitting on this top table with us today, and that is John’s mother, Cathy, who sadly passed away just last year.

I’ve joked a lot about John tonight, but I know that Cathy would be incredibly proud to see the man that you have become, and over the moon of how happy you are today with Mia.

So, if you wouldn’t mind joining me in raising a glass to John’s mom, who can’t be with us today, but is with us in spirit. Cheers. 

On behalf of the wedding party, I would just like to say a huge thank you to John and Mia, for including us in their special day.

It’s been a wonderful day so far, and all Mia’s hard work planning and prepping has truly paid off. John, you just sit there and look pretty. 

In addition, I’d like to thank both Mia’s parents, and John’s dad who have helped make this day extra special for the happy couple, which I’m sure they are eternally grateful for. 

I’d also like to say that the bridesmaids have done an incredible job helping Mia plan the perfect wedding, and for making sure that Mia looks every bit as beautiful as she does today.

They also had the difficult task of getting Mia to the church on time, which if you know Mia is a very big achievement, indeed. 

Finally, I’d like to thank the groomsmen for organizing and completing the best bachelor party Miami has ever seen. I only hope it was the send off John was hoping for before he begins the next stage of his life with Mia. (But I highly doubt it) 

John, I’ve loved being your best friend, and I thank you for bringing Mia into our lives. She’s a beautiful person, intelligent, and brings out the best in everyone she meets. Her only downfall is her taste in men! Just kidding. 

Seriously, I think everyone will join me in saying that we wish you only the best for your future together, and that we all can share one day in a love like yours. Cheers to the bride and groom! 

Ladies and Gentleman, I have an announcement to make. If there is anyone here tonight that is feeling nervous, apprehensive, or maybe even a little nauseous at what lies ahead…then it’s probably because you’ve just married Adam. 

For those of you who don’t know who I am, I am the best man, James. There are few words to describe Adam. Handsome, funny, but smart isn’t one of them. You see, Adam was my best man, at my wedding, and boy he did not hold back!

So, as we stand here today, know that my time has come for me to get you back!

Before I start the character assassination that is my best man’s speech, let me just thank Adam and Olivia for having us be a part of this very special day.

I know how much work has gone into making today as great as it has been, so thank you both for pulling it off! To be honest, I never thought Adam would find someone to marry, let alone someone as beautiful and amazing as Olivia!

I’ve known Adam for a very long time, all the way back to when he still had hair! We first met during our studies at X University. At first I thought we had nothing in common, but I quickly found out that we did. We would both likely fail our first year!

Our time at University was one of the best in my life, and I’ve far too many stories to tell you about our lovely Adam here. 

But, as the BEST man, I won’t do to him what he did to me. Instead, I’ll talk about his lovely qualities over the years. First up, is his beautiful singing voice. I can’t tell you how many times I heard the works of Marvin Gaye after he met Olivia.

We quickly banned singing in the shower at our dorm because of all the love songs he would belt out after going on a date with Olivia. To say he was smitten from the start is an understatement. 

And why wouldn’t he be? All those who know Olivia know what a lovely, and caring person she is. She deserves a good husband. Thank god Adam got there first before she could find one! 

Another defining quality that drew Olivia to Adam is his caring nature. We’re incredibly proud of Adam for working as an EMT and helping people every day.

I’ll never forget the time a few years back during a friendly soccer game where I slipped and fell over on my side, snapping and breaking my ankle.

Adam was at my side within SECONDS…to let me know he caught my fall on video. Emergency Medical Services *Scoff*. Only when he saw the angle of my ankle did his medical training kick in.

All jokes aside, Adam and Olivia have always been there for me, and I them. I’d like to think of them as family rather than friends, and can only hope that continues going forward.

Adam and Olivia…I’ve never met two people more perfect for one another. You are both kind, old souls, and you make each other incredibly happy. So, if you all could raise your glasses with me, and toast to this amazing couple…to the bride and groom!  

Hello everyone. My name is Kane, and I am the best man, and longtime friend of Rob. I was, however, somewhat surprised to be asked to be the best man, as Rob has never been able to admit this over the years.

At first, I thought this was great. I get to plan a bachelor party for Rob, but then he reminds me I have to write a killer speech that would likely make everyone laugh. 

I had no idea where to start, so I decided to trawl the internet for inspiration. After a few hours, I found some really….really…great stuff. But then I remembered I needed to write a speech, so I got off YouTube. 

I asked friends and family for advice, and according to tradition, I am supposed to sing Rob’s praises and tell you all about his fantastic qualities. Well, sorry to tell you, but I can’t sing and I don’t lie. So that’s out of the window. 

But, Sophia told me I can’t say anything too rude or controversial about Rob. Instead, I can only say nice funny things, so with that in mind, thank you and goodnight all. 

Just kidding. Seriously, Rob is one of the most kind, funny, caring and compassionate people I have ever met. This is a quality that I think brought Sophia closer to him.

His willingness to do anything for anyone, without accepting anything in return is what makes Rob extra special, and a joy to be around. 

In turn, Sophia is one of the sweetest, and funnest ladies I have ever met! We’ve shared many great memories together, with my partner included, as Sophia and Rob are actually our children’s godparents. 

I’ve known Rob for years. We grew up only a few doors apart on our street. I thought there was no kid cooler than Rob. He had all of the best hot wheels, Pokemon cards, and I had a huge crush on his big sister, Natalie *winks at groom’s sister*.

Looking back, I was probably a big nuisance always wanting to go play over his house, but I had some of the best time of my life growing up with Rob by my side. We’ve been there for every big moment of each other’s lives.

Graduation, getting our first jobs, our first cars, and now I get to be here for the biggest day of his life, where he gets to marry the beautiful Sophia. 

Sophia and Rob, your love for each other shines through you. Sophia, I’m happy to step down as I can see that you two are truly best friends, and meant to be.

I can’t think of anyone better to look after my Rob here, and I know he will do everything he can to look after you for the rest of his days. 

Thank you both so much for a fantastic day. If the rest of your lives is half as good as today has been, then you are in for a joyful marriage indeed. Please join me everyone in raising a glass to the newly weds, Rob and Sophia. Cheers! 

Best Man Speech Frequentl Asked Questions

Does the best man have to do a speech.

The best man does not have to give a speech if he really does not want to, or if there isn’t enough time because there are other people doing speeches, but it is tradition and expected of the best man to do a speech. 

When Does The Best Man’S Speech Happen?

The best man speech will typically happen after the groom has said a few words. However, every wedding is different, and the bride and groom may organize the day differently depending on how they think the speeches should flow. 

How Long Should A Best Man Speech Be?

A best man speech should be short and sweet, but not too short, and not too long. A happy medium is about 5-6 minutes in length. You don’t want it to be shorter than 3 minutes as it may seem too brief.

The point is to keep the audience engaged, and deliver a few anecdotes, thank the bride and groom, and raise a toast. 

What Should You Include In A Best Man Speech?

There are a few things that you should include in the best man speech. This is who you are, and how you know the bride and groom.

In addition, you need a fun story about the groom and you, and why you think the bride and groom are an excellent match, followed by your best wishes for the couple and a toast to their future together. 

Who Should You Thank In A Best Man Speech?

In the best man speech, you should thank the bride and groom of course, but you can also thank the bridesmaids or groomsmen for their efforts, or say thank you to the parents of the bride and groom, especially if they have contributed a lot to the wedding.

To summarize, writing a best man speech is not all as bad as it seems.

With this ultimate guide, you’ve got all of the tools you need to succeed, and successfully deliver a hilarious, fun, lighthearted speech that is sure to wish the couple all of the best for the future.

Whether you are looking for examples, tips, what to do, or what not to do, we’ve covered it all in this handy guide.

Now, instead of stressing out about what you are going to say, how you are going to say it, you can look forward to the wedding planning process in the run up to the big day, and most importantly…the bachelor party!

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Lisa Plaitt

Hello, I’m Lisa Plaitt and I have been married to my wonderful husband for almost five years. We met almost a decade ago now and I love him more everyday. But on my wedding day - the day that was supposed to be about celebrating us - I was far too stressed to enjoy it. My husband proposed to me in spring and it was a very lowkey setting, in our backyard without anyone else around to see it. It was a perfect proposal. But then everything got real, and I was suddenly thrust into planning mode.

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Best Man Speech: The Definitive Guide to Smashing it

by Catherine D July 12, 2019

Here’s all you need to deliver an incredible and unforgettable best man speech.

Congratulations!

You’ve just been awarded the highest honor a bro can receive.  You’re the best man! And that’s an honor greater than being knighted by the queen. But I’m sure you know what comes with it.

You’ll have to give that best man speech brosef!

Though, you won’t want to give just any speech off the top of your head that nobody is going to give a damn about.

Just remember what Uncle Ben said to Spidey, “With great power comes great responsibility”. It’s that serious, man.

You’ve probably seen best man speeches like this before. The guy stands up, hits the glass and says something, uninspired, about how he’s bros with the groom, congratulates the bride-to-be, and then sits down.

Or maybe you’ve seen another kind of speech, where the best man stands up and talks about nothing for 10+ minutes, putting you to sleep, because who even cares?

During a reception, there are about a million different things going on. People will forget the things that do not grab their attention, especially at a reception.

Everyone there is busy talking, eating, laughing, and will not care or even remember a boring speech in a few days. But not yours, my friend, you’re going to be the star of the day.

In this guide, we give you everything you need to know in sequence - from the writing process, all the way to delivering that wedding toast. Get your notepad ready for some very important tips on giving your wedding toast!

So How Do You Write the Best Man Speech?

The hardest part is always just getting started. Here are some basic tips on how to write a best man speech so that you can be prepared and dominate when the time comes.

Be Prepared and Plan Ahead

Practice makes perfect. Creating a fantastic speech doesn’t happen overnight.

If you’re going to wow the audience, you’ll need to make sure you’ve done everything you possibly can and covered every base - and man, that takes time.

Generally, 2-3 months is the right amount of time to give yourself when writing for a best man speech to account for the overall writing process and potential rewrites.

Considering all of the events that follow, like the bachelor party and the suit fitting, you’ll be too busy in those final moments to prepare a killer best man speech that’s even half decent.

Record Every Thought

You might be on the bus or in your car and think of an incredible quote or one-liner to say in your wedding toast, but our memories are very limited.

It’s difficult to remember what you even had for lunch two days ago, much less something you thought up some random time.

No matter where you are, record your thoughts. You could write in a journal, use your iPhone’s “Voice Memos” app or an app like Evernote . Scratch them onto a napkin, carve them into a stone near you, just get those wedding toast ideas down!

As long as you start capturing your thoughts, you’ll eventually reach a gold mine.

Think of this more as ‘capturing’ than ‘writing’. It’s easier to capture your raw best man speech ideas than banging your head on the wall trying to ‘write’ something from scratch.

Keep a Positive Tone

When it comes to the best man speech, the main thing to keep in mind is the goal of what you want to accomplish - celebrating the bride and groom. Here are some things to focus on:

• Your best experiences with the groom.
• How great a pair the bride and groom are.
• The best qualities of the groom.
• Possible first thoughts on the bride when they met (If they were good thoughts!)

Focus on the best of times, and further expand upon those points the best you can and maybe you can use those for a few wedding jokes!

With that in mind, here’s what not to say:

What Not to Talk About in Your Speech

While you may be writing to make your groom laugh, you need to remember your audience is diverse. You have children, elders, and teenagers so you wouldn’t want to write something inappropriate.

Generally, it’s best to avoid things like these:

• Any previous relationships.
• Anything about drugs, alcohol, gambling.
• Perverse topics, or anything of a sexual nature.
• Harsh negativity.
• Inside jokes that are too specific.

The idea is to avoid anything raunchy or disheartening during your speech, even if it might be hilarious in your head, you’ll have to avoid it in your best man speech.

Think about how upset Grandma would be if you happened to talk about how her little Jimmy actually hasn’t been saving himself for marriage - what horror!

How Long Should a Best Man Speech Be?

So you have a great speech, and you’ve covered every single talking point that fit. Everyone’s going to love this, right?

Wrong! When writing a best man speech, you’ll want to keep it way, way shorter.

The problem is that what you wrote is almost 30 minutes long! No bueno amigo. Nothing on this Earth could keep people engaged in a wedding toast that long.

You’re not going for a ‘F.D.R. Repairing the American Psyche During The Great Depression’ type of speech. What you want is more like an ‘I Love You, Man’ speech.

It seems like everyone from everywhere throws out an arbitrary number ranging from 1-10 minutes, but really, research shows our attention span is even shorter than a goldfish .

Which means you have 8 seconds to make an impression . Let that sink in.

The best man speech is usually between meals at a reception. That means you have to make your mark - and get in what you have to say in a short time. Meaning that short best man speeches are perfectly fine, you don’t have to overthink it.

It can be 1 minute, it can be 5 minutes.  Keep the audience engaged in your speech and don’t ramble off unnecessarily.

How do you do that? Practice!

It’s All About Practice

You know, it’s okay to feel unsatisfied with what you wrote. After all, you’re not the most accomplished writer in the world. You just want to prepare a great best man speech and get back to Netflix binging.

The writing process can be tough, so here’s an ideal approach that most people use when writing the best material:

• Write a few pages of content just to get the speech ideas out.
• Realize that you’ve written a movie's worth of material.
• Take what you really like.
• Edit until you stop hating it.

Being intimidated serves no purpose.

Get Interviewed Bruh

If you’re not the best writer (or capturer), the previous steps might seem a little intimidating to you. That’s fine. Not everyone can put pen to paper as well as they’d like, and if that’s you, consider having a friend interview you!

Getting a friend or family member to interview you about your experiences with the groom is a great way of getting wedding speech ideas. Here are a few topics to get interviewed on:

• Where did you meet?
• Did you like each other at first?
• When did you become bros?
• What kind of crazy experiences did you have together?
• What kind of bad qualities does he have?
• What kind of good qualities does he have?

Answering these questions with a recording device can help you when you need to put the best man speech together, and you can recall things you might never have just by writing!

Be (Relatively) Sober

Even if you have a Wade Boggs alcohol tolerance, it’s best to keep the drinks to a minimum.

( The guy drank 64 beers on one cross country flight, what the hell? )

Having one or two drinks is fine if it helps calm the nerves, but any more will mess up any chance of giving a decent best man toast, and you’ll just look silly slurring your words or acting strangely. Remember, all eyes are on you during your best man speech.

Try Some Best Man Speech Jokes or Quotes

So suppose you’ve got your speech together, but you have a placeholder like:

[ Put a joke in here! ] in 3-4 spots, and you really have no idea what to put in there.

We got you covered.

Here are some best man speech opening lines you could work with and personalize for whatever you may need, because the opportunity for wedding jokes is a rare thing! These make great icebreakers to warm your audience up.

“Well, where do I even start? [Groom] is just incredible. He’s brilliant, funny, caring… Anyway, I can’t really read your handwriting [Groom], so just tell me whatever the rest was after.”

“[Bride], you really are an incredible woman. You deserve an absolutely incredible husband, so I’m not going to stop until I figure out what’s wrong here.”

“Thank you everyone for bearing with me, I Googled ‘best man speech jokes’ and every site asked for my credit card before showing me any examples, so here goes nothing.”

“For those of you who know the bride, she’s really a wonderful woman who deserves a wonderful man. So good job, [Groom], for marrying her before she found one.”

“For anyone who finds this speech particularly not funny, I got all of my jokes from [Groom] so please, blame that guy.”

“Ladies and gentlemen, I wasn’t given a microphone tonight and I deeply apologize. To anyone in the back, If you hear silence at the front, be sure that you’re not missing anything.”

“Ladies and gentlemen, before I begin this speech I’d just like to say I am absolutely thrilled that I beat the bartender at rock-paper-scissors twenty minutes ago for the honor of best man.”

Putting Together a Best Man Speech Outline

Now that you have an idea of how to write a best man speech, it’s just as important to know how to structure it. While there are canned free best man speech templates out there, it's really best to get a bird's eye view on what you want to say and create a structure that works for you personally. Don't just take any random free speech template from online and fire it up. Not every outline or template will work for your needs, so get a good idea of your vision first then begin to structure it.

Flow matters, and it’s the most important thing in putting together great best man speeches. Without good flow, you’ll lose the crowd and people won’t follow what you’re saying.

Here are some great ideas to nail the best man speech structure and make your speech shine.

The Introduction

The introduction needs to serve a single purpose: Getting people engaged! This is the key aspect of any best man speech formula.

The One-Liner Approach

An incredible one-liner is a great way of getting started. A good idea for this would be to roast the groom a little bit, he probably wouldn’t mind.

For example, what faults does he have? You can take advantage of that to make slight jabs at him.

Or you can even make fun of yourself in the process, what do you both suck at? Maybe you want to talk about that awkward mullet phase you both had in high school. Live it up!

The Congratulatory Approach

Alternatively, you can open by showing gratitude to:

• The bride and groom, for bringing everyone together.
• The guests, for attending this incredible event.
• The parents of the bride and groom, for bringing them into this world.

This approach is a good option at the beginning. You can use it as a Plan B if you think you can’t gather an appropriate one-liner.

It’s easy to get lost in thought about what to follow up a good opener in a best man speech, but nothing is safer than a good story to engage your audience.

The idea is to create a connection to the groom and then present it to the guests.

Here are a few ideas to get you started:

• Where you met the groom.
• What makes him a great guy.
• Crazy stories that show who he is.
• Why he’s an excellent fit for the bride.
• How he changed for the better after he met the bride.

Really, anything goes, and they’re all sure to keep people interested. Focus on the organic story of your friendship and don’t be robotic.

You’ll want to accomplish this in a way that stays kosher, though, avoiding unsavory details mentioned in our #4 tip.

Congratulate the Bride

So, you don’t have to do this, but we definitely encourage it. The issue is, not everyone really knows the bride. Honestly, maybe you met her a month ago, or a week ago.

Who knows, you could have met her literally just now. When your buddy gets hitched, it’s quite common to not really know the lady herself.

If this is true, you can handle this two ways:

Stick to something like:

“I knew she was a great fit for you the moment I saw you together”.

“She really is the perfect match for you dude.”

Sure the groom will know you barely know her, but whatever, if he really is your bro, he’ll appreciate that you’re saving face like this.

2. Avoid it.

Look, you’re the best man, it means the groom chose you, he knows you. Which means that he’s most likely expecting your best man speech to be about your experiences together, so keep the content focused around your relationship.

This means that it’s okay to avoid any mention of the bride after the first few words when writing a best man speech.

It works in most cases to just congratulate her in the intro, and then continue on with your speech avoiding her entirely.

This might sound a little underhanded, but it works, and most likely, the audience won’t notice.

If you know the bride, then speak about her.

If you’re just as close to the bride as you are to the groom, then you need to take all of the prior steps to make a compelling speech for the bride too, which won’t make the best man toast easy but hey, you don’t want to piss her off.

You could share a story about her too, or you can talk about one where the bride and groom shared with you, which is always a safe bet.

How to End Your Wedding Toast

Here’s where you wrap up your thoughts, and keep this part short, you don’t have to stress it too much.

It’s as easy as saying something like,

“Jack, Jill, to a lifetime of good health, love, and joy!”

There are a thousand different things you can say here, but the main idea is to keep the tone positive, upbeat, congratulate their love and wish the best for them.

NOTE: It is absolutely acceptable to keep a paper copy of your speech on hand because you’re not remembering your speeches like a world leader at the U.N. You’re just a guy who’s happy for his bro.

Best Man Speech Examples

Even if you have everything else down, it’s always best to have some speech examples of how to tackle your wedding toast.

People have done it before you, so why go in blind? Here are some different types of best man speeches for unique scenarios you may want to try for your best man toast.

Funny Best Man Speech (Example)

“Hello Everyone, I’m John, I’m the best man, and if you find this speech unfunny, [Groom] and I have the same sense of humor, so please blame him.

I’m just joking, of course, I promised [Groom] I wouldn’t roast him too much today or talk about anything too weird, so I’ll just talk about the good parts of his character...

...Thank you, everyone, have a great evening.

But really, [Groom] and I have been friends since before I knew how even to tie my own shoelaces. He’s a brother to me, even more than my actual brother, sometimes.

Sorry, Alex.”

Emotional Best Man Speech (Example)

“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. I’m the best man, Chris. [Groom] and I go way back, all the way from high school. Through the years, he’s grown from a pain in the ass, into a fine man.

[Groom] was always shy when it came to meeting new people, and that’s sorta hard to hear considering how a guy like that could be such a perfect match with [Bride]. But I can’t imagine him without you, because I’ve seen what it looked like.

[Bride], you are both so dear to me, please take care of [Groom], please keep him out of trouble.”

Short Best Man Speech (Example)

“Good evening, everyone, from the moment that [Groom] met [Bride], I knew that this was going to be something special.

The way you two talk to each other, you’re so alike sometimes that honestly, it kind of scares me.

But to quote Mark Twain, ‘To get the full value of joy you must have someone to divide it with.’ May your love be timeless.”

Hopefully these wedding toast examples give you ideas on how to model your own best man speech!

The Presentation - Delivering the Best Man Speech

You have the writing and the flow down. Great! Most of the hard work is all done.

But don’t forget, you’re delivering a best man speech. And grand statements are always accompanied by excellent speech etiquette.

Here are some best man speech tips that’ll help you deliver, so that you don’t look like an uncomfortable 4th grader at a talent show your Mom forced you into.

Practice Your Speech on Camera

You’re noticing a trend, right? Practicing the actual delivery of the best man speech in front of a camera is a great way to see what poor and good habits you have.

And then, you need to keep practicing to eliminate the bad ones. For example, do you notice that you slump too much? Do you happen to mumble? Do you look down a lot?

Take note of all of these when you look at the recording and then try the speech again while mindfully avoiding bad habits and watching out for awkwardly delivered wedding jokes.

Practice in Front of People

Sure, using a camera is an excellent way to correct issues, but there’s nothing better than getting an outsider opinion.

Getting a spectator to sit and watch you deliver your best man toast lets someone tear into your bad habits without any bias. It may be painful, but this is what you want, and a larger group of people is best.

That way, when it’s time to give the best man speech, the concerns an audience member might have are already known to you.

The Honest Truth Man

Remember that a best man speech is a celebration of the love and joy that the bride and groom share. You don’t have to stress about every minor detail, because the audience isn’t (and they’ll most likely all be drunk anyway).

They’re already lightened up, and in the mood for a good few words, so why spend your time being nervous? It’s not worth it. Enjoy yourself up there and just deliver that crushing best man toast.

After it’s through, you can start drinking again, which is what you’ll probably want to do anyway.

Say what you have to say, and raise a toast to the bride and groom. Use this guide as a helpful resource and come back to it as many times as you need to ensure a totally awesome best man speech.

Good luck on your best man speech!

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• Who Gives a Speech at a Wedding Reception? How to Write a Wedding Toast Tips for the Father of the Bride Speech How to Write a Best Man Toast Advice for the Maid of Honor Speech What to Know About a Newlywed Toast Public Speaking Experts' Wedding Speech Tips 60 Quotes to Use for Your Wedding Toast

How to Write the Perfect Best Man Speech

Two experts share the best tips for writing a winning toast.

Photo by Sydney Noelle Photography

In This Article

First of all, congratulations on being asked to be the best man. You, of course, have many important responsibilities —like groomsmen shepherding and bachelor party planning , among others—but there's only one task that will secure your proud ascension into the ranks of becoming the MVP: Giving a killer toast.

The best man's speech traditionally follows the groom's speech and is a chance for you to say some sweet words about your relationship with the couple and your best friend. But, if the thought of public speaking has your kneecaps sweating, we found you two coaches with years of experience to help ease your nerves.

Ahead, with the help of President Barack Obama's former speechwriter David Litt, and Pete Honsberger, author of Wedding Toasts 101: The Guide to the Perfect Wedding Speech , here are the best tips for writing a perfect man speech, in order to pull off the most amazing toast ever.

The Best (and Worst) Best Man Speech Ever

Meet the Expert

• David Litt was the speechwriter for President Barack Obama from 2011 to 2016 and is the author of the New York Times best-selling book Thanks, Obama.
• Pete Honsberger has been a serial groomsman, speaker, and wedding toast advisor for most of his adult life. When it comes to wedding toasts, he's seen just about everything—you can read about it in his book, Wedding Toasts 101: The Guide to the Perfect Wedding Speech .

Best Man Speech Template 

Getting all your thoughts and feelings down on paper can be overwhelming, especially if you're not used to sharing those sentiments with the guys. And for those who are unsure of what to write for the big day, here is a guideline to help you find your flow.

Find a Theme

A theme is a unifying idea that ties the whole speech together. Think of it as the takeaway of your speech, or the one thing you want guests to remember. The best way to identify your theme is by making a list of your favorite stories. "You’re not going to just write a speech from scratch. Start by brainstorming stories. Most importantly, what you’re looking for is the theme that comes out of those anecdotes," says Litt.

Build a Framework

The best way to organize your thoughts is to create a blueprint of the key points you want to hit first, sort of like a toast skeleton. After you've established the roadmap, fill it in with pertinent details and memories while still ensuring you're staying on point. "Think about it in terms of ideas," says Litt. "You can get in one or two short anecdotes, maybe three, and one big idea. If those are good, you don’t need more."

Instead of thinking of yourself as the speaker, imagine that you're actually standing in the audience. Think about what the audience would like to hear, rather than what you want to do.

Focus on the Newlyweds

Most best men will include a story or two about their friendship with the groom, but don't center the whole speech on it. "Remember the relationship that you’re celebrating is the one between the two people getting married. You’re giving the speech because you can shine some unique light on that relationship," says Litt. "If the relationship that you’re really giving the speech about is the one between you and the groom, things [will get] awkward."

Share Your Feelings

Deliver something more meaningful than one joke after another. "Generally speaking, men think of the best man speech as a funny speech to give because we’re very uncomfortable sharing how we actually feel. But, what makes a good best man speech is the part where somebody shares how they feel. Humor is just the icing on the cake," says Litt. The newlyweds chose you to speak because you have something notable to add to their big day. Embrace your personal insight into their bond and don't try to dilute it by just being funny.

Best Man Speech Tips

Ahead, find our best tips for making sure your speech is as polished as possible.

Consider Your Audience

You can't nail a speech if you have no idea who to tailor the content to. "Feel free to ask beforehand. When I was writing speeches for the president, we had a point of contact where the speech was happening to say who exactly is in the audience. You can do a smaller-scale version of that. Your point of contact is probably your friend getting married . But, the nice thing about giving the best man speech is that, ideally, it’s both specific to you and universal to the couple," says Litt.

"I would say almost never start with talking about how nervous you are. I’d also say just relax. That’s a hard thing to tell someone to do. But remember, you’re not putting on a show," says Litt. "You're simply talking about your best friend and the love of their life, two people that you've probably spent a lot of time with. In the end, it should just flow and come out easily." Litt also suggests, "imagine you’re just telling a story to a group of friends because, really, you are."

Stay True to Yourself

Stick with who you are and how you would normally act around your friends; you don't need to adopt a character just because you're giving a speech. For example, if you aren't normally the comedian in the group, don't try to tell a bunch of jokes. If you're not usually a super-sentimental person, don't force it. There's nothing wrong with keeping your speech more lighthearted . The couple already knows (and loves) your personality, so the more genuine you are, the better your speech will be received by both the newlyweds and their guests.

Don't Rely Solely On Humor

While a few jokes sprinkled in can be a great tool for loosening up the crowd, don't make these the meat of your toast—especially if comedy doesn't come naturally to you. "Let me put it this way. There’s such a thing as too many bad jokes, and that number is about one. The more you treat it as an open-mic night, the less happy everyone involved is going to be. You don’t need to go in thinking, 'How do I get invited back next week?'" explains Litt.

Keep Things Positive

Even if you think it's well-meaning, don't turn the toast into a roast or make jokes at the couple's expense. "I’ve seen best man speeches where someone thinks, 'Oh, my job is to roast the groom .' Unless the couple specifically told you that’s your job, that’s not your job. The way to think about jokes is that you don’t want people to be laughing at the groom or at the couple. You want people to be laughing because they suddenly know the groom better than they did before." says Litt.

Don't Upstage the Newlyweds

Litt's previous boss (former President Obama) really enjoyed telling other people's stories at speaking engagements, and this ultimately strengthened his messages. "His speeches are not really about him. They’re about other people," says Litt. Channel Obama by keeping your speech focused on the couple. "You’re not performing. You’re there because you know someone and care about them, and you’re sharing that with a bunch of other people. Even a great best man speech is not supposed to steal the show. If somebody says, 'That speech was nice but almost forgettable because we were so focused on the bride and groom,' that’s a win. You don’t need to be the star," advises Litt.

Keep Things Appropriate

"My general rule for wedding speeches is: If you have to ask yourself, 'Is this appropriate?' it’s not. And if you’re the kind of person who doesn’t know, ask a friend. If they give you that slightly horrified look, listen to that look," explains Litt. Keep in mind that your audience will include guests of various generations and cultures, like your friend's grandparents, boss, and colleagues. Refrain from mentioning anything that you wouldn't want your grandma or boss to know.

Get a Second Opinion

Remember, you'll be delivering this toast in front of an audience (as if you could forget, right?). So it doesn't hurt to get some feedback on what you're planning on saying. "If you’re the kind of person who has a track record of going a little too far with your surprises, you should be self-aware enough to run this by a third party—maybe another close friend or a friend of the bride ," says Litt.

The last thing you want to do is stand up and give a speech that you've never said out loud. "The best thing to do is practice with a friend. Anybody giving a big speech rehearses beforehand. If you’ve already gotten good feedback from field-testing your remarks with a smaller group, then you’re going to come out on the wedding day comfortably knowing you have a good speech. It's that uncertainty that can be scary when you’re up there speaking," says Litt.

Keep It Short

Let's be realistic: Super-long wedding toasts annoy guests. "I’ve never been to a wedding where anyone said, 'That was a great wedding, but the best man speech was just too short and that ruined it.' I would say five minutes is the absolute maximum. Three minutes is fine. There’s no question that if you’re reading this, you’ve sat through a speech that was too long. But when you start writing a speech, you almost never think, 'Is this going to be too long?'" explains Litt.

Limit Your Drinks

Don't embarrass yourself by slurring through your toast. "Being one drink in works for some people, but being more than one drink in is never a good idea. At that moment when you’re like, 'You know what I need? Another couple of shots.' That is never what you need," advises Litt.

Best Man Speech Openers

Now that you understand the fundamentals of creating a great toast, your next step is to sit down and start writing. If you need a little help getting your speech going, though, our experts share a few ideas to kick-start the process.

Introduce Yourself With a Twist

Want to tell the crowd exactly why you're the best man? Honsberger says to get straight to the point and tell them how you know the groom . Most importantly, add some flavor to the first few lines. Spice it up a bit, as anyone can do the standard, “For those of you who don’t know me….” Simply put, ask yourself what a twist would look like in your own introduction. 

“Good evening, if you’re in this room and don’t know me by now, then you’re probably at the wrong wedding. I am, of course, [your name], and I’ve been best friends with [groom] for 25 years…”

“Hello and welcome to tonight’s reception. [name of groom], YOU truly are MY biggest fan. Wait, that didn’t come out right…As I was saying…”

Crack a Joke, Even a Corny One

Remember the audience when determining whether your joke should be said, but ultimately, try and see if you can get the crowd to laugh in the first 30 seconds. To achieve this, Honsberger says to simply reach into your own bag of jokes or look one up online. "I’d encourage you to first spend a little time reflecting on your own comedic ability. If you’re coming up empty, then consult outside resources," he notes.

"Hello, I’m the best man [your name]. This entire day has been beautiful so far. In fact, I’m getting emotional. The wedding cake has me in TIERS. (looking at a three-tiered cake).” 

"You’re probably wondering why I asked you all here tonight…well, I can promise it’s not for my 'Magic Mike' performance. You’ll have to stick around to the last song for that."

Be Hilarious With a Straight Face

While still technically a joke, this is you working hard to sound serious while saying something absurd. And if you get this right, you’ll hear a little giggle immediately, followed by laughter from the rest of the crowd once they figure out what you said was a joke.

“Good evening, I am [your name], the best man and [relationship to groom] of [name of groom]. Tonight we’re in a room full of great men –doctors, lawyers, military veterans, and successful businesspeople –yet I am the 'best.' His words, not mine.” 

"As Abraham Lincoln once said, [say something outrageous than Lincoln obviously never said—an inspirational quote, movie line, piece of advice, etc.] … and that’s what brings us all together tonight to celebrate [couple's name].”

Introduce a Recurring Theme

Choosing an overall toast theme can help you start strong. If you decide that your relationship with the groom can be summed up by sports, college, vacations, a mutual love of running, or whatever fits you, that can be your theme. And if that’s the case, your opener is simply the first, or the best, story you have related to that specific topic. 

“Hello and welcome, my name’s [your name], and I’m here to talk about my amazing friends Mike and Liz. They are truly a story of opposites attracting. 

For example, Liz’s favorite food is french fries, and Mike is allergic to potatoes. Mike has an obsession with ice cream, and Liz is lactose intolerant (pause for laughter).

Thankfully, things have a way of working out, and we are gathered tonight to celebrate the most important thing they have in common…incredibly good looks. I mean, LOVE.”

Just like that, you’ve captured the audience, let them into the world of the married couple, and got them excited for the rest of your toast. 

Ask a Question to Answer Throughout

If you’re questioning your toast opener, try leaning into that approach. Instead of looking for the answer, embrace the question. Think about what you would want to know about the groom if you were a distant relative or family friend sitting in the audience, says Honsberger. What would be an interesting question to explore about the couple? Use that. 

“Good evening. My name is [your name] and I’ve known [groom] for more than [#] years. As I was preparing this toast, one question consistently rang in my mind: How do I summarize a friendship that has lasted since we [when you met]? Believe it or not, [groom] was [name a quirk or characteristic about him] back then, too.” 

“But really, how can I possibly speak to all of our experiences in just a few minutes without turning it into one big inside joke? Do I talk about …?” 

Then, spend the rest of the speech answering that question, and you’ll never lack information to share. 

Rhyme-Master Flex

Really want to capture the intrigue of everyone in the room? Start rhyming your sentences. Honsberger says he tried this in his first-ever wedding toast, and the result was an audience hanging on every sentence, wondering what the next line would be.

“Good evening ladies and gentlemen, I am Dan's younger brother, Pete. Many of you, I already know. Some, I have yet to meet.

Dan and Kate, thank you so much for this amazing chance, to speak on your special day … by the way, I call first dance. (crowd boos in jest) Sorry, but I called it! 

I’ve looked up to Dan ever since I’ve had sight. He was always bigger than me, and he was always right. 

Being the oldest of four boys couldn’t have been an easy thing. But in a house full of hyenas, Dan was the Lion King."

Read a Definition from the Dictionary

Here’s a chance to leverage one of the most straightforward and honest resources in existence: the dictionary. All you need to do is find one word that defines the couple’s relationship , says Honsberger. This can be serious and sentimental or funny—your choice. Just make sure it's relevant to the couple. 

“Google’s second definition of the word ‘love’ says, ‘A great interest and pleasure in something or someone.’ I think this is beautiful and an understatement when I think of [bride] and [groom]’s marriage. Although I was a little concerned when, under the definition, the word “love” was used in a sentence as ‘His love for football.’ Hmm, strange…”

“Who’s ready to dance tonight? Wikipedia defines the word ‘dance’ as ‘a performing art form consisting of purposefully selected sequences of human movement,’ and those words have honestly never come to mind when I think of [groom] dancing. I might be kidding, but there’s only one way to find out!” 

Tell a Story of How You Met

If the groom is a friend, chances are you have a good story of the first time you met or early in your friendship. If it’s your brother or family member, simply use one of your first memories together, whether playing, adventuring, or getting into trouble.

“The year was 1993, the class was kindergarten. I was building a beautiful tower of blocks when out of nowhere, they were knocked to the ground by a classmate without mercy or even an apology. That classmate was Matt, and we’ve been best friends ever since. And Matt, I’m sorry for throwing the blocks at your head after that.” 

Begin With a Quote

Simple and overused? Maybe. Effective? Absolutely. If you want to make the groom smile immediately during your toast, use a quote that you both recognize. If there’s one that his partner appreciates, too, even better. 

The most important reminder when using a quote is to ensure the audience feels like they’re part of it, too. Unless the quote is universally known, briefly mention its origin right after saying it. Let them into the joke and they’ll be with you for the rest of the toast. 

“Good evening everyone, my name is [your name], and I’m the best man tonight. When coach [name] used to tell you to ‘Be an Athlete,’ this is what he meant. When anyone on our team missed a tackle, it was ‘be an athlete,’ when our jerseys weren’t tucked in, same saying. We’ve adopted that as a cure for any issues in life. When [groom] really wanted to introduce himself to [bride], the solution was simple. ‘Be an athlete.’ And he was. So if you see [groom] miss a step on the dance floor later, be sure to remind him to ‘Be an athlete.’"

Read Something in a Different Language

Looking for a way to involve international members of the  family  in your toast? Look no further than practicing a phrase and reciting it in their native language to begin your toast. If that doesn’t apply in your situation, yet you still want to shake things up and be unique, you can translate a wedding-related sentence into another language. It will be intriguing, and you’ll sound smart! 

“Hello and welcome to everyone in both families on such a beautiful day. Me llamo Pedro y necesito que te diviertas porque esta boda es muy cara (wait for laughter from Spanish speakers). If you don’t speak Spanish, I said that I need everyone to have fun because this wedding is really expensive!” 

The Bottom Line

At the end of the day, this speech is about the couple getting married, why you love them so much, how happy you are for them, and why you're honored to have this role in the wedding party. Keep things light, positive, and succinct—and also remember that the celebration is all about love, and no one is here to make you feel nervous. Make time to practice the speech, take a few deep breaths before you begin to speak, and focus your attention on the couple. Before you know it, you'll have given a speech for the books!

The best man traditionally speaks at the wedding reception following the maid of honor, though some couples may schedule the speeches during the rehearsal dinner instead.

The best man gives one speech either at the wedding reception or, less commonly, the rehearsal dinner.

The best man's speech serves as a special lens for the audience to better understand the groom, and the newlyweds, through his significant position in their lives. The focus should be to highlight the relationship of the newlyweds rather than the relationship between the best man and groom.

A Guide to Wedding Reception Toasts

Who Gives a Speech at a Wedding Reception?

How to Write a Wedding Toast

Tips for the Father of the Bride Speech

How to Write a Best Man Toast

Advice for the Maid of Honor Speech

What to Know About a Newlywed Toast

Public Speaking Experts' Wedding Speech Tips

60 Quotes to Use for Your Wedding Toast

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Writing a Best Man Speech: Outline and Guide (+3 Examples)

• by Marisa Jenkins
• January 24, 2024

Being chosen as a bridal party member —especially as a best man or maid of honor —is a big deal. You have been given the opportunity to support someone in such a momentous part of their life. Your role comes with plenty of responsibilities, including making a speech at the reception.

Having an outline for your speech as a best man can be really helpful when you start writing the draft. Here is a classic and timeless example of an outline:

• Self-introduction
• Short icebreaker ( optional )
• Stories about the groom
• Talk about the partner
• Talk about their relationship
• Well-wishes and advice

Below is a more detailed explanation of each part of a best man speech outline, followed by a step-by-step guide—with tips—for writing the speech itself. Some examples are also provided to help you in the process. 

Best Man Speech Outline: Easy Template to Use

Greet everyone present (1–3 sentences).

Before anything else, make sure to greet the guests, bridal party, and vendors at the venue. Acknowledge their presence and the effort they put into being there on the newlyweds’ special day.

You can keep this part brief but upbeat to get your guests engaged and listening to your speech as a best man.

Example : Hey everyone! Thank you for making the time and effort to attend Ben and Stephanie’s wedding.

Introduce Yourself (1–2 Sentences)

At the reception, odds are most people—but not all—will know who you are. For everyone’s benefit, briefly introduce yourself and your relationship with the newlyweds.

Example : For those of you who don’t know me—first of all, how dare you? Kidding aside, my name is Ryan Drews, Mike’s best friend and life coach. We’ve known each other since high school.

(Optional) Short Icebreaker (1–3 Sentences)

If you feel like you still need to capture your guests’ attention, consider adding a short joke or anecdote before you get into the body of your best man speech. You can get a good laugh and set the tone for the rest of the speech. 

Example : Honestly, I was a bit nervous about giving this speech. People said it should only be as long as Gavin’s attention span. So… I guess that’s all for my speech, goodnight!”

Personal Stories and Memories With the Groom (1–3 Paragraphs)

Share a personal story that showcases your relationship and closeness with the groom. It does not necessarily have to be relatable, but make sure the memory will highlight the groom’s personality and positive traits.

You can also talk about the groom’s growth and development over the years. How much has he changed? How has he changed? Shed light on the positive changes you have observed since he and his partner got together .

Example : [Compare the groom’s personality during high school and today. He might be more mature, patient, and mentally strong than before. If you have one, share a story that illustrates these changes.]

Talk About the Partner (1–2 Paragraphs)

Do not forget about the star of the night—the other newlywed. Talk about your first impressions, the day you were first introduced, and any striking memories you have with them.

Example : [Where did you meet each other for the first time? Did you have dinner somewhere? What did you think of her initially, and how did this impression change?]

Talk About the Newlyweds (1–2 Paragraphs)

Compliment the couple and talk about their relationship. Highlight their strengths, share how you think they complement each other, and tell them how they make you—and everyone around them—feel.

Example : You two are an example of how a healthy dose of annoying each other can actually go a long way in making a relationship better. But all jokes aside, you guys inspire everyone around you to be kinder to one another and themselves.

Conclusion: Well-Wishes and Advice (1–2 Paragraphs)

The last part of a best man speech’s outline can contain well-wishes, advice, or both. Share any wisdom you have regarding marriage, and tell them that you are praying for the best for their future.

Example : Always remember that marriage is a two-player game: both of you must put in the same amount of effort to keep the game going. Congratulations, Mr. and Mrs. Linnehan! May the future be bright and boundless for you. 

Writing a Best Man Speech: Steps and Tips to Follow

Step 1: Gather Material by Reflecting

Take a trip down memory lane and think about your relationship with the groom over the years. Write down any funny stories, milestones, and incidents that come up.

At the same time, think back on what you know about the groom’s relationship with his partner. How did they meet? How did you meet his partner for the first time? What makes their bond and journey special?

As you reflect, think about their qualities as individuals and as a couple. These traits will be a great addition to your best man speech.

Tip: Start Early

Do not leave your speech as a best man to the last minute. Ideally, start brainstorming and thinking of what to say as early as a few weeks before the wedding day. This will give you plenty of time to write, revise, and revise some more.

Step 2: Structure Your Speech

The outline above will help you structure your speech. However, feel free to add any personal touches or make changes to the order.

Tip: Decide What Tone You Want to Use

Spend a moment to decide how you want to deliver your speech. Do you want to be funny and witty? Do you want to sound casual? Do you want to flex your poetic muscles? Do you want to incorporate multiple styles and tones?

Step 3: Start the First Draft

Eventually, you have to put pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard). Write everything that comes to mind, letting your past reflections guide you as you compose your best man speech.

Do not worry about making it perfect on the first try—no one ever gets it perfect on the first try. Let yourself word vomit until you have written everything you have in mind.

Tip: Do Not Go Too Heavy With Inside Jokes

Although you understandably want to show how well you know the groom and make your guests laugh, avoid sharing inside jokes. Everyone will not get it without explaining the necessary context; you simply may not have the time to do so.

Step 4: Edit and Refine Your Draft

Start with any obvious grammatical errors. Fix faulty subject-verb agreements, incorrect uses of prepositions, and whatnot. You can use apps like Grammarly or built-in grammar checkers to help you with this part.

As you go along, read the speech aloud or in your head to see if there are any awkward spots. You may have to rephrase certain parts or rearrange sentences to make your speech flow better.

Be patient with yourself, as it might take multiple revisions before you get a speech you are satisfied with.

Tip: Keep It Concise

Aim for a best man’s speech that does not exceed 4–6 minutes. Any more than that and you risk losing your guests’ attention.

Step 5: Practice Giving the Speech

After a few revisions, start practicing the speech out loud. One benefit of this is that you will spot more ways to revise your speech to make it better. 

At the same time, a practical tip is to mark points in your speech where you will pause for a moment and take a breath. This will make the delivery more relaxed and natural-sounding.

If possible, ask for a close friend or another bridal party member to listen to your speech. They can give you constructive criticism and feedback to further improve the content and your delivery.

Tip: Read the Room

As you practice your delivery to a test audience, pay attention to how they react to what you wrote. They might think that a certain anecdote is too embarrassing for the groom or that your speech has more humor than sincerity.

You might unintentionally humiliate yourself or the groom if you include stories that are too personal. Likewise, you might come across as insincere or performative if you try too hard with your speech.

Adjust your speech and delivery accordingly. As mentioned above, the revision process never stops—even as you give the speech at the reception, odds are you will make a few changes off the cuff.

Step 6: Make the Final Preparations

Print a few copies of your speech on high-quality stationery, as it is good to have extras in case something happens. If nothing else, it can be a wonderful keepsake for the newlyweds.

Make sure to have some positive coping mechanisms for stress as well. Look into breathing practices to help you manage your anxiety and stage fright.

Tip: Engage the Audience

Do not just read off your copy, since this will make you sound robotic. Pay special attention to making eye contact with guests, pausing for reactions, and ad-libbing when the opportunity presents itself. 

Speech from the Best Man: Heartwarming Examples

1. Ladies and gentlemen, may I have your attention for just a few moments? Before I continue with my speech, I want to thank everyone for being here tonight. We know it isn’t cheap to attend a destination wedding, so we do want to make it clear that we will not be offering any rebate or cashback.

Anyway, for those of you who don’t know me, I’m Brian Mills. Nolan’s my cousin, and he has given me the honor—and stress—of being his best man. We actually only became close in high school when we both tried out for the basketball team.

Needless to say, both of us didn’t get in. We did continue practicing in our free time. These games allowed me to get to know Nolan better.

A lot has changed since then, huh? In high school, Nolan was wild, impulsive, and a bit irresponsible—we both were. Now, though, Nolan is reliable, clever, and puts everyone’s needs before his.

I remember when Nolan first introduced me to Lisa. His eyes were lit up in a way that I’d never seen before… not even when the Lakers won that championship in 2020! The more I got to know Lisa, the more I understood how perfect they are for each other; they’re both kind, adventurous, and passionate.

Lisa, I want to officially welcome you to the madness that is our family. We promise not to share too many embarrassing stories… at least until after your first anniversary.

Kidding aside, I have never seen Nolan as happy as he is with Lisa. You both bring out the best in each other, and it’s clear to all of us here that you share a love that is deep, genuine, and enduring.

So, let’s raise our glasses in a toast to Nolan and Lisa. May your love be modern enough to survive the times and old-fashioned enough to last forever. Cheers!

Thank you, everyone. Enjoy the rest of your evening!

2. Good evening, everyone! How’s your night going so far? I hope the food and drinks are all to your liking; we worked very hard tasting every dish our lovely caterer had to offer.

I’m Alex, and I have the great privilege of being David’s best man. Before I start, let’s give another round of applause to the beautiful couple. David, my man, you look sharp tonight! But I think I speak for everyone when I say: Emily, you’ve definitely stolen the show.

I’ve known David for almost 20 years now. We first met in middle school, and our friendship has been a rollercoaster ride ever since. From camping trips that turned into survival missions to late-night study sessions that rarely involved studying, I can say we’ve had our fair share of memorable moments.

But today, I want to focus on the biggest adventure David has had: his adventure with Emily. I still remember the day David told me about Emily. He said, “There’s this incredible woman.” And he was right. Emily, your kindness, intelligence, and sense of humor make you a perfect match for David. And David, well, I guess he isn’t too bad.

Together, you two are like a fine wine—you just keep getting better with time. David, you’ve found your soulmate in Emily. Your partnership is a testament to what every love should have—support, laughter, and a lot of patience (especially when David tries to cook or crack a joke).

Emily, welcome to our small, silly, but very loving friend group. You bring out the best in David, and for that, we are all grateful.

David, I have one piece of advice for you as you enter this new chapter: a happy wife is a happy life. Always remember that.

As we stand here in this beautiful venue, surrounded by friends and family, I am reminded of a quote I once heard: “Love isn’t about finding the perfect person. It’s about realizing that an imperfect person can make your life perfect.”/

So, let’s raise our glasses to David and Emily. May your life together be filled with endless love, laughter, and luck. Cheers!

Thank you, everyone. Let’s make this a night to remember!

3. Hi, everyone! I just want to take a few minutes of your time to say some words about our lovely newlyweds. My name is Charles, and Manny chose me as his best man.

The love story I’ve witnessed over the past six years is nothing short of magical. First of all, their growth as individuals is very laudable; I’ve seen Manny go from a slightly reckless and clueless college student to a calm and collected man. I can confidently say that Jenny’s presence has been transformative to Manny.

Jenny, it is clear that you and Manny are soulmates. Thank you for taking care of him, keeping him in check, and humbling him whenever he needs it.

May your love be a sturdy lighthouse amidst a rough and rowdy sea, shining a light that will guide you through the darkness and unpredictability of life.

Congratulations to you two! Cheers to the future!

Final Thoughts

Being someone’s best man is a huge honor; it means you occupy such a special part of their life they wanted you to have this major role in their wedding.

When preparing a best man speech outline, the most important thing to keep in mind is authenticity—stay true to yourself. If you want to write an amazing, unforgettable speech, just focus on pouring your heart onto paper. Everything else will follow.

Marisa Jenkins

Marisa Jenkins is a wedding planner and event coordinator. Her main goal for WeddingFrontier.com is to simplify the wedding planning process by sharing her years of expertise in the industry.

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How to Write a Best Man Speech (6 Easy Steps)

So, it happened. You were asked to be the Best Man at a close friend or relative’s upcoming wedding. And of course, you said yes!

But now that means you have to write and deliver a Best Man speech, and maybe you don’t have a clue where to start.

After all, it’s not something you do every day!

If you’re feeling unsure then don’t worry, you’re in the right place. I’m going to tell you exactly how to write a Best Man speech.

And the good news is it’s not rocket science. It’s just a sequence of logical steps.

So let’s see what they are, shall we?

Step 1: Learn the Logistics

One of the easiest mistakes to make is assuming that things will run a certain way on the day of your speech.

To avoid any nasty surprises, find out in advance how the wedding day and the speeches will be organised. Because things may be a little different to what you expect.

Here are some smart questions to ask the Groom before you get started:

• What’s the date of the wedding (basic but crucial!)
• Where do the speeches fit into the overall schedule?
• Who else is scheduled to speak and in what order? (Usually it’s the Father of the Bride, then the Groom, then the Best Man, but there are lots of possible variations.)
• Are there any specific time constraints you need to be aware of?
• Are there any topics that the Groom would prefer you to avoid?
• Are there specific stories the Groom will mention in his speech (so you can avoid duplicating them in yours)?

The Groom may not have all the answers to hand, but just getting a few answers can give you confidence to start working on your speech.

Step 2: Brain-dump Lots of Ideas

Once you’re clear about how your speech will fit into the wedding day schedule, and you’re aware of any important constraints, it’s time to start generating some ideas.

During this early phase, it’s best to focus on quantity rather than quality of ideas. I call it “brain dump mode”.

You don’t need to worry about structure or flow or anything like that, you’re just getting some raw ideas scribbled on a writing pad or typed into a document on your computer.

Your aim is just to generate as many possible topics as possible that could be used somewhere in your speech.

(Imagine these as the basic building materials you’ll use to assemble your Best Man speech.)

Here are some questions to ask yourself while in this mode:

• How did you first meet the Groom?
• What are his best (and worst) qualities?
• What are the most memorable moments from your friendship?
• What are the “running jokes” you share?
• What makes him and his new wife a good match?
• What advice do you want to pass on to your friend?
• What tips can you give his Bride for life with him?

More so than other speeches in the traditional wedding line-up you’ll want to look for ideas that present an opportunity for humour.

Remember: a genuinely funny Best Man speech isn’t just one that’s littered with off-the-shelf jokes. It’s one where you draw humour from real-life observations and situations that are specific to your friend.

(For more help with generating ideas, you can also check out my list of Best Man Speech Prompts.)

Step 3: Decide on a Suitable Structure

Now that you’ve generated some raw ingredients for your speech (and hopefully far more ideas than you will need!) you’ll want a structure to contain them.

There are lots of different structures you can use, and the best one will depend on the ideas you have generated.

Here are some possible structures:

• Chronological — if you’ve known the Groom for a long time you can structure your speech around key phases of his life: e.g., school days, early adulthood, first job, etc. It’s usually best to work your way forwards from your earliest memory to the present day.
• Perspectives — another option is to look at the Groom from a few different perspectives. For instance, what’s he like as a friend, as a sportsman, as a travelling companion, as a drinking buddy, etc.? What’s he like in his professional life compared with his personal life?
• Characteristics — you could also organise your speech according to the Groom’s most striking qualities or characteristics. You could talk about his loyalty, his determination, his sense of fun, his ambition, and so on, illustrating each one with examples and stories.

Note: Different structures will also give your speech a different “feel” so think about the style and tone you’d like to aim for.

You can also combine these structures to suit your needs. You could even choose a more novel structure driven by a big idea.

For instance, what if you structured your speech as a fairy tale with the Groom as an intrepid hero who has to overcome different challenges to win the heart of the princess (his Bride)?

Or you could structure your speech as a business presentation, complete with PowerPoint slides, which describes the “features and benefits” of the Groom as if he were a new product.

If you’re not sure what structure to use, look at your list of brainstormed ideas and see if they fall naturally into a set of categories.

Step 4: Organise Your Ideas

Looking at your chosen structure, write 3 to 5 headings for the main body of your speech. (You’ll add an introduction at the start and a toast at the end later in the process.)

Then pick the best ideas from your brainstormed list and start to drop them underneath the headings or sections of your speech.

What this looks like in practice will depend on whether you’re working on paper or on your computer. (Writing single ideas on sticky notes and moving them around between different headings or sections can be very effective.)

However you organise your speech, keep an eye on the balance between different sections…

If a section has too many ideas, you’ll need to trim it down.

If it doesn’t have enough ideas, you’ll either need to cut the whole section or generate some more ideas for it.

Here’s what a simple outline of your speech might look like:

Introduction

• Introduce myself as the Best Man and childhood friend
• Make a joke about how weird it is to see him dressed so smartly
• Apologise in advance to the Bride for what I’m about to reveal about Jason

School days

• Tell the story of us meeting on the first day of secondary school
• Talk about how I was always getting him in trouble (and how one teacher told his parents I was a “bad influence” on him)
• Talk about the temporary falling out we had when we fancied the same girl

University days

• Describe how he went off to university and I got a “real” job, but we stayed in touch even as we took different paths in life
• Tell the story of the messy weekend when I visited him in his student accommodation for the first time (and I got him into trouble — again!)
• Say how proud I was the day he graduated with a first class degree (but I had to buy the celebration drinks because he had no money left)

Working life

• Talk about how getting a job was a wake up call for him after his “cushy” three years as a student
• Say how none of his friends really understand what his job entails and how we all suspect he’s really a spy (like a really boring version of James Bond)
• Tell the story of the lads holiday we took after his first year at the company and how he got food poisoning on the last day and spent most of his first day back in the office toilet

Give him some credit

• Talk about how he’s a loyal friend who’s been a great source of support during hard times
• Talk about the time he used his annual bonus to pay for a big night out for all his friends to thank them for their generosity when he was a skint student
• Compliment him on his work ethic and the success he’s created for himself in life

Talk about the Bride

• Describe the time he introduced me to Caroline for the first time (and how I didn’t make the greatest impression on her)
• Tell the story of the holiday to Turkey where he invited her along and I got to know her properly (and had the chance to make a better impression)
• Talk about some of the personality improvements I’ve seen in Jason since he started dating Caroline

Raise a toast

• Wish them much happiness for the future
• Raise a toast to the couple

Step 5: Write Your First Draft

Once you’ve organised your speech ideas into a rough outline, it’s time to create the first full draft of your speech.

This isn’t so you can memorise the speech perfectly, but it helps you decide if the speech flows smoothly.

Write your speech out in long hand if you prefer but I find it easier to type it into your computer and move sections around as needed.

Start with an outline like the example given above and then start to expand each of the main points into sentences and paragraphs.

Tip: If you’re entering your speech on a computer and your software supports it consider using the dictation feature to create the first draft. It’s an effective way to write your speech in the same style that you speak.

Try not to agonise over the exact wording of each of the points. Your goal is just to get a rough version of your whole speech written down.

Once your speech is around the right length too long as fine consider doing some editing based on the following questions:

• Is each section of my speech roughly the same length or do some sections get too much attention and others not enough (i.e., it’s unbalanced)?
• Do the sections flow smoothly into one another or do I need to use more transitions (sentences or short paragraphs that link one idea to the next)?
• Is the overall structure effective or does it need a rethink?

Once you’ve finished this step you should have a full draft that, with some additional editing and polishing, you’d feel happy giving at the wedding.

Step 6: Practise, Revise and Repeat

Once you’ve completed your first rough draft, it’s time start practising your speech to see how it sounds and flows when spoken out loud.

You have a few different options during this stage of your speech preparation:

• You can just read the speech to yourself and see how it sounds.
• You can make more of a performance of it and practise in front of a mirror.
• You can film yourself on your smartphone and watch yourself back at your leisure (warning: watching yourself can feel awkward at first but the discomfort quickly fades!)

As you practice your speech out loud you’ll find that some sections flow better than others. You’ll realise that certain ways of phrasing certain sections are fine on the page but turn into tongue twisters when spoken.

Have a pencil to hand and make notes over any sections that need tweaking to make them easier to perform.

Note: You’ll need to “rinse and repeat” to evolve your speech into the finished version.

Once you’re fairly happy with your speech content, you can give your speech in front of a trusted friend or relative to get an external perspective (not the Groom though — his first exposure to your speech should be on the wedding day).

Getting feedback from someone else will help you understand if the parts you intend to be funny seem funny to other people too. Ask them to be candid about what works and what doesn’t.

Note: Time yourself to get an idea of how long the speech will last. Add an extra 20% to allow for audience reaction and the possibility of being more verbose when giving your speech for real.

Once you’re happy with you speech there’s no need to memorise it word for word. You can always summarise the main topics of speech using small cue cards and use those as a safety net on the big day.

Go Write Your Best Man Speech!

It’s time to stop wondering how to write your Best Man speech and just get on and do it. Because the truth is that these six steps are all you need.

Why not make life easier for yourself by writing your speech over a couple of weeks, rather than squeezing it into one afternoon the day before the wedding?

Taking your time helps to give you a bit of perspective on your speech content and also gives your brain a chance to come up with some new ideas.

(You’ll have more time to practice too.)

Read More Like This

10 Best Man Jokes You Should Avoid at All Costs

10 Best Man Speech Mistakes That Make You Look Like An Idiot

5 Things Guests Will Wonder About Your Best Man Speech

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How to Write a Best Man's Speech

Last Updated: January 17, 2024 Fact Checked

This article was co-authored by Patrick Muñoz . Patrick is an internationally recognized Voice & Speech Coach, focusing on public speaking, vocal power, accent and dialects, accent reduction, voiceover, acting and speech therapy. He has worked with clients such as Penelope Cruz, Eva Longoria, and Roselyn Sanchez. He was voted LA's Favorite Voice and Dialect Coach by BACKSTAGE, is the voice and speech coach for Disney and Turner Classic Movies, and is a member of Voice and Speech Trainers Association. This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources. This article has been viewed 2,654,341 times.

Even the most talented public speaker can get nervous about giving the best man's speech at a wedding. Being the best man is one of the biggest honors you can receive at a wedding, and you're expected to give a speech that respects that honor, makes the crowd laugh and cry, and pays tribute to the special couple on the most important day of their lives. The important thing to do when making a best man's speech is to thank people for being there, describe your connection to the groom, and to make people laugh while avoiding any cringe-inducing comments. If you want to know how to write a moving and memorable best man's speech, then see Step 1 to get started.

Sample Best Man Speeches

Writing a Special Speech

• For example, most best man speeches have a bit of humor in them for levity and to get the crowd going. But if this really isn't for you and making jokes just feels too forced, you don't have to follow that convention.
• On the other hand, if you're known for your humor and sarcasm, you don't have to force yourself to be overly sentimental. Just a few words of honest sentiment would get the message across without making you feel like you're faking it.
• If public speaking is not for you, don't be nervous about it. You can even make a joke about how much you love public speaking, or about how this is the groom's way of punishing you/getting you back for that time you made him push your car up a hill.

• Though your speech should be well prepared in advance, take a look at the crowd; if people are particularly restless or eager to drink and dance, then you may want to cut out that second anecdote you weren't sure about.
• Though it's typical for the best man and maid of honor to give a speech, there may be other speeches given out there. The father of the bride sometimes speaks, and there may be two maids of honor and thus, two speeches. And maybe even drunk Uncle Bertie will try to say a few words. If there are a number of speeches, then it's especially important to keep it short so the crowd doesn't spend all night listening to people talk.

• Don't be embarrassed about keeping a written version of your speech with you when you go up there during your big moment. Even if you don't use it as a reference, just having it there can make you feel more confident about not making any mistakes.

Delivering Your Speech

• Remember that people often videotape best man's speeches. You don't want yourself looking sloppy on camera for all of eternity.

• Depending on how the reception goes, someone else may introduce you and you won't have to do this part. But be prepared in advance in case you're given the microphone and find that your audience isn't exactly rapt.

• "For those of you who don't know me, I'm Brian, [groom's name here]'s little brother."
• "I'm Jake, [groom's name here]'s best friend. I've known him since the seventh grade, and I've known [bride's name here] ever since their second date."
• "I'm Danny, [groom's name here]'s best friend. I've known [groom's name] and [bride's name] ever since our freshman year of college. We all lived in the same hall."

• It's also nice to thank the guests for being there. You can also thank the bridal party.
• Optionally, you can also thank the bridesmaids. Mention what great friends they have been for the bride and tell them how lovely they look. You can play this for laughs a bit as long as you don't come off sounding like a total creep. You can say something about the lovely color of the dresses, how big of a help they've been during the wedding, and whatever else you can say that is quick and tasteful.

• Remember that half of the people in the room may not know each other. People should be able to find your speech funny and moving without knowing the groom or hearing an excessive amount of detail about someone they don't know. Of course, if it's a more intimate wedding and it seems like most people do know each other, then you can go into a bit more detail, if you like.
• If you're the groom's brother, you can joke around about how he used to tease you mercilessly when you were little, or how you used to give him a hard time. You can also make a joke about how not much has changed in that regard.
• Remember to keep up a nice emotional balance. You should have as many sweet and heartfelt comments about the groom as jokes. [6] X Research source

• Tell a funny story. This will not only break up the formality of the ceremony, but also help endear the couple to the audience. A great way to grab everyone’s attention would be to introduce it by saying “I'm about to let you in on a secret about the groom" or "the groom begged me not to include this story in my speech but I simply had to."
• Alternatively, tell a touching story. A particularly appropriate story might describe how the bride and groom met or something sweet that helped move their relationship forward. Since you are the groom’s best friend, this might be a good place to describe how you watched him fall head-over-heels for the bride.
• If you can't think of any appropriate stories or don't know the bride well enough to include her in one, make some observations about love or marriage in general, or about the groom's feelings for the bride. Even if you haven't spent a lot of time with the bride, you can make observations about the first time the groom told you about the bride, or what the groom said about their first date.

• Though you want to choose a humorous anecdote, make sure it is appropriate for everyone; the last thing you want is to come across as humiliating or mean-spirited.
• If you mention that time when the groom and bride broke off their engagement for three weeks or talk about how much more fun your best friend used to be before he got with his "ball and chain," then his wife may never forgive you. You don't want to sever your relationship, or put it in question, over something like saying a few thoughtless words in a speech.
• Don't make it a speech about how you first really didn't like your buddy's wife and then came around, either.
• And lastly, do not think it's funny to insult the venue or the food. Someone shelled out a lot of hard-earned cash for what you might think are tacky Christmas lights or rubbery chicken.

• You can talk about something the groom did for you. Say something like, "I'll never forget the time Mark helped me move across the country to follow my dream. I couldn't have done it without him."
• It's completely normal to find this part a little embarrassing. Just remember that this is your buddy's day, and no one's going to laugh at you for getting a little sappy.

• If you don't know the bride very well, that's okay. Instead of saying that bluntly, you can say something like, "Though I haven't spent as much time with Mary as I would have liked, I could tell right away that she was right for Jeff."

• Say something like, "Even when Mary and Jeff are on the opposite side of a room, you can feel them looking out for each other. They don't have to be glued together to have such a strong, incredible bond."
• You can also make a comment about how much you admire their relationship and have always looked for a love as strong as theirs (if you're single). If you're married, you can share some thoughts on marriage and why the groom and bride are a great match.
• You don't have to overdo it and say they are a perfect pair, meant for each other, soul mates, or the like, if you don't really feel that way. You can mention the strengths of their relationship without making it sound too forced.

• Don't force yourself to do this unless you find one that's really fitting. There's another one that goes, "Marriage isn't about looking at each other. It's about looking outward in the same direction."

• You can say something like, "Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to propose a toast to Mary and Jeff. May they have years of joy, happiness, and health ahead of them."
• You can also say something like, "Here's to a lifetime of happiness for Mary and Jeff."
• If the bride took the groom's last name, you can propose the toast to "Mr. and Mrs. Thompson."

Community Q&A

• Make the bride's family, who may not know the groom, feel comfortable about the groom taking over his new protective role and starting a new life with the bride. Thanks Helpful 1 Not Helpful 0
• Keep mints in your pocket, as you will be getting up close and personal with many on the day of the wedding. Thanks Helpful 1 Not Helpful 0

• Stay sober before giving your speech. Looking like a drunk will sour everyone's impression of you and may call the groom's judgment into question. Thanks Helpful 28 Not Helpful 55
• Don't force humor. If you don't like speaking in public and aren't confident in your ability to be funny, it's much better to read a serious speech off index cards than to try to become a comedian for one night. Most jokes from "Best Jokes for Weddings" books or web sites are not funny. No one will be mad at you for not being funny enough, but every single person in the room will cringe if you suddenly transform into Michael Scott. Thanks Helpful 1 Not Helpful 0
• Unless you're certain that you know all of the guests and their tastes, do not let your speech get off-color. Skip the dirty jokes, the suggestive remarks about the honeymoon, and the stories about the groom's ex-girlfriend. They probably aren't appropriate. This isn't a locker room. Even if the groom and his friends find them funny, the bride and her mother probably won't. Thanks Helpful 1 Not Helpful 1

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• ↑ https://www.artofmanliness.com/character/etiquette/how-to-write-deliver-good-best-man-speech/
• ↑ Patrick Muñoz. Voice & Speech Coach. Expert Interview. 12 November 2019.
• ↑ https://www.theknot.com/content/best-man-speech
• ↑ http://www.askmen.com/money/how_to/best-man-speech.html

About This Article

To write a best man's speech, try to keep your speech around 2-4 minutes so you don't lose everyone's attention. Start your speech by introducing yourself and saying how you know the groom and bride. Then, share a touching story about the groom and maybe even throw in a light-hearted joke. You should also compliment the bride as well as the bride and groom's relationship. Finally, wrap up your speech with a nice quote and propose a toast. To see examples of a best man's speech, keep reading! Did this summary help you? Yes No

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How to Give a Great Best Man Speech

If you’re freaking out about pulling off a best man speech at a wedding, we understand. There's an art to the best man speech. Here's our best advice for giving a great best man speech.

The First Look ✨

• You should absolutely aim to tell a story, combine humor with emotion, address the groom’s new wife, and end with a sweet note.
• Avoid long or rambling speeches, inappropriate material, telling inside jokes, and being too tipsy for the speech.
• To give the best speech possible, prepare your material and practice it, don’t speak too fast or too slow, and don’t dwell on any mistakes you might make during the delivery.

Let me guess: if you’ve made it here, you’re a best man (or a best woman), and you’re nervous. First off, congrats on this special role of honor! You’re gonna do great. But if you’re freaking out about pulling off all of your groomsmen duties , especially having to write and deliver a best man speech on the wedding day, we understand. There is an art to the perfect best man speech. Too far in any direction, and a bad speech can negatively alter the mood of a wedding in a snap.

But before we make you even more nervous, take a cleansing breath and lower your heart rate: you’ve come to the right place. We’re here to guide through the process of writing and giving a stellar best man speech from start to finish, including a list of dos and don’ts, tips on subject matters, and a sample best man speech outline to focus your efforts. Follow our advice, and you’re sure to walk away with praise, admiration, and an awesome groomsmen gift .

Before we get into the do's and don'ts, we'll provide you with a short list of things to include in your speech. Generally, for a great best man speech, you'll want to:

• Have an opening line that will grab the crowd's attention. This can be funny or sentimental, whatever you think works best.
• Say congratulations to the bride and groom. Acknowledge the major commitment they just made and the event that brought you all together.
• Say some nice words about the groom's new spouse. This is your friend's new life partner, say a few words about this person that highlights why they are perfect as the groom's spouse.
• Tell a funny story or joke about your groom. Keep it appropriate and relevant to the audience.
• Give a toast to the happy couple. Close out your speech with some nice words to wish the newlyweds a loving and happy marriage.

Best Man Speech Dos and Don’ts

Goes without saying, but this is an instance where “I’ll just wing it” doesn’t work in your favor. Although you don’t need to memorize your best man speech, don’t save this one until the night before. A few thoughts jotted down on a napkin will look like you didn’t put any care or thought into your words (because, uh, you didn’t). A month or two out, but no less than a week, take some dedicated time to compose your thoughts. This will also allow you time to seek input and feedback from others (more on this below).

DO Research and Crowdsource

The best best man speeches (with me?) are those that let the audience know a little bit more about the groom—in a good way—so try to include some funny and/or sweet stories from his childhood, adolescence, or young adulthood. Ask the groom’s parents, siblings, or other close friends for any great tidbits that you could weave into your speech for greater authenticity and dimensionality.

DO Be a Storyteller

As mentioned above, good stories make for a good speech. Take your listeners on a little journey about your friend and how we arrived at this day: what kind of person he is (as demonstrated by X anecdote from his past), how you know each other, how he met his partner, how their relationship grew, why they are such a great match, and what you hope for their future. If you can weave in a little thematic joke or a narrative through-line, even better.

DON’T Ramble

Tell a short (short) story, not a novel. No one wants to hear you digress about something unrelated to your key message, or worse, about yourself. Remember, this isn’t your show—this moment is about the newlyweds, so resist the urge to go off on a tangent.

DO Combine Humor With Emotion

A great speech includes a healthy mix of humor, sentimentality, good-natured ribbing, and sincerity. You want the groom, and the rest of the wedding guests, to feel both amused and touched by your words. If you’re naturally funny, include some clean jokes about the newlyweds that won’t hurt anyone’s feelings (jokes at your own expense are alway a safe bet). If you always botch the punch line, it’s perfectly fine to stick to a straightforward message of warmth and congratulations.

DON’T Be Too Mean, Crass, or Dirty

Making people laugh is good. Making people uncomfortable is not. I know I don’t have to remind you, but offensive, off-color, or any mean-spirited joke at the expense of an individual or group is a no-fly zone. If you stop and ask yourself, “Should I say this?,” that’s a good indication that you should just not. And if you normally swear like a sailor, watch your language and avoid profanity.

DON’T Tell Inside Jokes

If only you and the groom (or a small handful of other people) will understand what you’re talking about, then it’s probably not good material to include in a best man speech. You don’t want to alienate your audience by making them feel like they’re not in on the inside joke. Stick to universal topics and be inclusive in your story- and joke-telling.

DO Keep It Clean(ish)

This one is obvious, right? The key here is to know your audience. Remember that you’re not just addressing the groom and groomsmen, but every single wedding guest—which might include ages 3-93. Joking about adult topics must be done subtly and in good taste. To keep things classy, be intentionally vague and keep the examples lighthearted. Don’t go into sordid detail, don’t share anything that could get anyone in trouble, don’t reveal anything truly humiliating in an embarrassing story, and avoid bathroom humor.

DO Address The Groom’s New Spouse

So that your entire speech doesn’t feel awkwardly lopsided, be sure to say some kind, sincere, and personal words to your best bud’s new partner for life. If you are also friends with him/her, even more reason to share an anecdote about why this person is great individually and doubly great for your friend. Remember that this special day celebrates a step they’ve taken together, so be sure to address them both.

DO Borrow Language

Not all of us were born with the gift of gab. If Wordsworth you are not, there’s no shame in stealing some great lines from the masters. Look up some quotations on love, relationships, or marriage to either guide your speech’s theme or to pepper in at the beginning and end for greatest impact. Writers and essayists like MLK Jr., Pablo Neruda, Shakespeare, or any of the Romantic poets are good places to look for inspiring quotations.

DON’T Get Tipsy

While it might be tempting to throw back a few after the “I dos” to loosen up for your moment in the spotlight, use common sense. Has consuming a bunch of alcohol in a short amount of time ever helped you be more articulate, quick on your feet, or sensitive to the passage of time? My guess is no. Wait until after your speech to take advantage of the open bar, because it will be clear to the crowd (especially the groom) if you are not in your best frame of mind.

DO Practice Out Loud

Nowhere is the phrase “practice makes perfect” more true than in public speaking. Besides familiarizing yourself with the material, you’ll be able to hear any mistakes, awkward phrasing, or weird timing when experiencing the words out loud. Practice reading your entire speech to a partner or friend before the wedding reception, get their feedback (and have them time you so you know if you need to add or cut), and practice again until you feel solid.

DO Speak Clearly

If you have a bring-down-the-house kind of best man speech but no one can understand it, what good will it do? Make sure your one-liners zing and your heartfelt wishes bring tears by speaking loudly and clearly, enunciating your words, and appropriately using a microphone or any AV equipment that’s provided.

DON’T Dwell on Your Blunders

Every public speaker misses a line or trips up their words now and then. Rather than drawing attention to an error by apologizing profusely or joking about how bad a speech-giver you are, simply make a quick correction or skip over it and move on. Dwell any further, and your audience will get uncomfortable or lose confidence in you.

DON’T Just Read, Engage

Being nervous is totally normal—but if your nerves are too apparent, they can distract your audience or put them on edge. A clear sign of being nervous is racing through your speech like you’re competing for a NASCAR trophy. Take deep breaths, use the above tips about audience engagement, and speak nice and slowly. We promise, it’ll be over before you know it.

DON’T Go Long

That being said, don’t be longwinded or hog too much of the wedding reception’s precious timeline, or your audience will start wondering when they can get on the dance floor rather than pay attention to your eloquence. Stick to whatever time frame the couple recommended, or if you’re on your own, aim for 2-5 minutes.

DO End On a Sweet Note

No matter what else you say or do, end your best man speech with positivity. Giving a few words of congratulations on the marriage, happy wishes for the bride and groom's future together, and a general toast in the groom and his partner’s direction are customary (for a reason) and always well-received.

Best Man Speech Topics to Avoid

There are really never any circumstances under which the following topics are a good idea to bring up in a best man speech. Don’t touch these subject matters with a 10-foot pole:

• Exes or previous marriages.
• General negativity about marriage.
• Illegal activity.
• Pornography or strip clubs. Just don’t.
• X-rated stuff.
• Sex, drugs, drinking, gambling…use your judgment.
• Bathroom stuff.
• Your own drama.

Template for the Perfect Best Man Speech

Follow this general outline, and you’ll slay on the big day.

• Salutation/introduce yourself
• Thank the hosts for the great party
• Funny, attention-grabbing opening line
• Great anecdote(s) about the groom (best if it supports #3)
• Reasons why the groom is great (as exemplified in #4)
• Why the groom’s partner is great/a great match
• Great anecdote about them as a couple (best if it supports #6)
• Congratulations/beautiful quotation/sweet wishes
• Toast to the happy couple’s future

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Nailing Your Best Man

Over the last couple of decades, best men speeches have become over-the-top, clichéd, and generally a bit embarrassing (for the best man, not the groom ironically).

Writing a great best man speech is actually pretty simple. Granted, the Speechy team are TV scriptwriters by trade, so we’ve got a head-start, but we’re happy to share the techniques we use to create original humour without resorting to cheesy ‘jokes’ or alcohol.

Our advice has featured everywhere from The New York Times to The Times . As the only wedding speech experts invited on to BBC Sounds ‘Best Men podcast with Jason Manford we have all the advice you need to nail it. 

* Of course, if you’re looking for more than ‘advice’, check out our best man template , speech edit, or bespoke service . Or, work with our new AI-powered team member – SpeechyAI!

Best Man Speech Etiquette

These days, best man speech etiquette is simply about doing a good job and not offending anyone. It’s not overly complicated. 

Don’t feel you need to be overly posh or formal just because you’re wearing a suit. There’s no need to address everyone as ‘ladies & gentleman’ ; a ‘well, hello everyone’ will suffice. 

Don’t buy into any ‘wedding waffle’, you don’t need to thank anyone or mention how lovely the venue is. Certainly don’t bother thanking the groom on behalf of the bridesmaids. That concept died out a long time ago! 

Here’s what you need to know…

1. How to start your best man speech

Many folk assume the first couple of sentences have to be a version of … ‘Good evening ladies and gentlemen. I’m (NAME) and I’m honoured to be (groom’s) best man today.’

Actually, no it doesn’t. Sometimes it can be. But it shouldn’t be automatic. Ask yourself if there’s anything more exciting.

Don’t waste people’s time with the same dull speech-fodder. Every word should count, so consider forgetting the ‘hellos’ altogether.

Controversial, we know.

The trick is to make the opening personal. Cut out the wedding white noise. Instead, cut to the punchline.

ALTERNATIVE OPENINGS

• Jump right in. ‘So they’ve finally done it. Sophie has agreed to put up with Rohan for the rest of her life and he’s got that in writing.’
• Address your audience. ‘Hands up who’s ever had to look after Stephen when he’s had a few beers?’
• Short and snappy. If there has been a delay to the wedding – a swift ‘Well, let’s start with the elephant in the room. Why has the gorgeous, talented Mario, married a bright orange lad from Croydon who still can’t spell?’
• Start with a story. ‘Let me tell you a story… when I first saw Tom, sitting in the bar, reading a book in the middle of the Saturday night chaos, I knew I had to speak to him. Only he was too absorbed in his John Grisham to notice me.’

2. Pay a genuine tribute to the groom

We can get a bit too excited about the prospect of  roasting our mates, but we do have to be nice about them to.

Remember, if it’s a straight wedding, the groom doesn’t (generally) get anyone paying a decent tribute to him. No one telling him how handsome he looks, what a wonderful son he is or what a great husband he’s going to be. 

So, as much as there’s an expectation for you to be funny, you should be nice too. Bonus points if you can make him cry 😉 Now, that would be funny.

3. And a decent tribute to his partner too

The best man must compliment the groom’s partner and it helps if this sounds sincere. 

If you don’t know them well, do a bit of research so you can say more than the usual platitudes. Ditch the ‘you’ve made him a better man’ cliche and get specific. Have they finally taught him to respond to texts? Have his culinary skills developed beyond a fried egg? 

Of course, you need to pay a bit of a tribute to them too, and don’t just resort to meaningless adjectives like ‘kind’ or ‘funny’. Instead, can they put up a tent better than their husband? Have they turned him into a quinoa fan? 

Be original but remember one cliche is a must; all brides look beautiful.

4. The best man toast & closing lines

Some best men like to compliment and raise a toast to the bridesmaids but it’s actually the newlywed’s job. Your choice really, but keep it short if you do.

We tend to avoid having any toasts within a best man speech, other than the final one at the end.  

According to Debrett’s the best man speech usually includes a toast to ‘Mr and Mrs/Mr [newlywed’s Surname]’ and might announce the cutting of the cake’. At Speechy we prefer to find a unique way to toast the newly-hitched. 

Ideally you want the toast to tie in with a theme or story that you’ve already established earlier in the speech, even if it’s just raising a glass to ‘the coolest couple this side of the Hog’s Head’, or ‘to a lifetime of dancing on tables together’. 

Examples of best man toasts…

• “To the groom, my partner in crime and the guy who finally decided to settle down. May your marriage be as adventurous as our bachelor days, but with fewer embarrassing stories. Cheers!”
• “Here’s to the groom, the man of the hour, and the reason I had to put on a suit today. May your marriage be as strong as your WiFi signal and as enduring as our epic gaming sessions. Cheers, my friend!”
• “As the best man, it’s my duty to embarrass the groom at least once during the speech. So here’s to the guy who once thought ‘Netflix and chill’ literally meant watching Netflix and chilling. May your marriage be filled with better communication than that! Cheers!”
• “To the groom and his new life partner, thank you for giving me the honor of being the best man. May your marriage be as smooth as your pick-up lines and as exciting as our infamous trip to Munich. Here’s to love, laughter, and a happily ever after!”

SpeechyAI  is great at crafting truly unique toasts for best men to deliver on the day! 

5. Best best man speech length

You’re aiming for 8 to 10 minutes for a best man speech (a bit longer allowing for laughter and ad-libs). It sounds short but no one ever listened to a best man speech and said ‘if only it were longer’.

The wedding experts agree… ‘There’s a great saying; delivering a speech shouldn’t take longer than it does to consummate a marriage.’ Alison Hargreaves, Founder of Guides for Brides .

Even if you have a wealth of material, be strict with yourself. Once you write your first draft, edit it down to half the length, and we guarantee it will be twice as good.

Ernest Hemingway said ‘The first draft of anything is shit’. This is not only true but reassuring.

People are generally more powerful when their words are punchy. It’s the same with jokes – keep ’em snappy.

Lots of sites offer  quick estimates of your speech duration  based on your wordcount and speaking speed. 

6. Keep the language clean(ish)

Obviously don’t swear if there are children present, though a few bloodies, bloomings and bollocks can add an acceptable edge. 

Check with the nearlyweds in advance and read the room on the day. 

We have scripted the odd F-bomb into a speech over the years but that’s been the exception and at exclusively adult-only weddings.

7. Questions the best men should ask the groom

If in doubt, ask the two folk in charge… 

• INTRO – Will you be be introduced by an MC or will you need to introduce yourself?
• THE SPEAKER SCHEDULE – When will you be speaking (stagger your alcohol intake accordingly). 
• SUGGESTED DURATION –  how long do the couple want you to speak? (Occasionally, some couples suggest five minutes or less. We think that’s quite tight so negotiate for between eight and ten minutes on the mic.) 
• EQUIPMENT – Will there be a mic? Will you have time to test it on the morning? If so, it’s  worth making sure you know how far to hold it from your mouth  etc.
• KIDS – Worth knowing if any children or prudish adults are in attendance so you can cater your content appropriately. 

How To Make Your Best Man Speech Funny

Being funny isn’t about finding good jokes on the internet. Avoid any articles like this basically – Maid of Honour Jokes . The jokes will illicit groans not giggles.

Yes, it’s more effort to write original lines but that’s no excuse for jokes about even the cake ‘being in tiers’ or honeymoons in Bangor (Google it if you haven’t already groaned at it!).

Self-deprecation is a brilliant tool to utilise. Arguably, the strongest, most powerful form of comedy. It’s also the safest.

Sometimes, the people who you think will be good sports aren’t.  The only thing that’s 100% safe for you to take the piss out of, is yourself.

Not only is it safe, it’s sensible. Studies have shown that people who use self-deprecating humour are seen as more humble and consequently more emotional intelligent and attractive. Yes, physically attractive.

So, while you don’t want the speech to be all about you, add a few self-depreciating lines in there. 

• “I must say, being chosen as the best man is almost as surprising as the time I tried to assemble Ikea furniture without looking at the instructions. Somehow, I got through both experiences, but I can’t promise the speech will be as sturdy as that bookshelf.”
• “I was honored when the groom asked me to be his best man. I guess he figured that with my shiny head, I would reflect his good taste. So, here’s to being the mirror of the groom’s impeccable judgment.”
• “Being the best man is a lot like being vertically challenged – it comes with its own set of challenges, like reaching the top shelf and convincing people that I’m not a lost child at the wedding. But here I am, ready to give a speech without the need for a step ladder.”

Start by thinking about the things that make the groom unique. Everyone’s a nut-job in their own way, so what traits will his friends and family recognise as truly ‘him’?

Ask yourself lots of questions – what’s his worst habit (skinny jeans), what’s his guilty pleasures (Dire Straits), what might he love more than his bride/groom (Abdul’s kebabs), what’s odd about him (his unusually short T-Rex arms).

Once you have good content to play with, the comedy will be much easier to find.

Imagine the groom was the central character in a sitcom. What type of person would he be?

The health freak who transforms into a borritos-eating monster after a pint? The workaholic engineer who still calls on his elderly dad to help him with Ikea flatpack? The family man who has a secret life in his shed?

Once you find a basic premise, use anecdotes to help build on the character you’ve created.

Good writing is all you need for a great speech. Powerpoint and props can often get in the way and stress you out.  Once you’ve committed to the projector, you’ve got to keep using it throughout the speech which can really restrict the content and tie you up in knots. And really, once you’ve seen one mullet, you’ve seen them all. 

Instead, concentrate your efforts on good writing. Keep your speech short and your jokes punchy. As Jason & Steve point out ‘When you’re starting off on the comedy circuit, you get a MAXIMUM of five minutes on stage. When you get really good – you get seven’.

One great joke is better than a dozen average ones.

A little comedy writers tip for you. 

The callback is where you plant a story or a piece of info at the start of the speech, possibly as a throwaway line, and then reference it later on. It makes it seem that you’ve been working up to that punchline the whole time and suggests you’re smarter than you are.

For example, you tell a story about how the groom accidentally stapled his shoes to the floor when he was renovating his first house. Later, you conclude your speech by wishing the couple a life adventure and travelling the world ‘…just make sure he doesn’t staple his shoes to the floor before you get the chance to leave.’

The callback is basically establishing an inside joke that everyone is part of.

To make it work

• Plant something funny, and crucially, memorable in the first third of your speech.
• Then simple refer to it towards the end of your speech.

Voila. You’ve become a comedy pro.

While plagarism and stealing other people’s ideas isn’t on, quoting other people is totally legitimate. 

Check out our ‘Best Man Quotes’ post to see how a they can help super-charge your speech. 

Check out some  best man speech videos  we’ve collated, or have a read of  Boris Johnson’s wedding speech as imagined by the Speechy Team. It will give you an idea of how professional comedy writers craft humorous lines. 

Of course, if all this advice has done nothing but convince you, you need help – then jump straight to all the different ways the Speechy team can help you , including  SpeechyAI ;  a genius tool we’ve built that’s guaranteed to help you develop unique and hilarious lines. Honestly, it’s bloody good. 

How to Write & Deliver A Best Man Speech

So you get the principle of what you need to do, here’s how to do it… 

First step in writing your speech is to make sure you have blooming great content. You might think you have loads of good stories already but there will be better out there, so get digging and get dirty.

Email your mates and ask for their favourite groom stories – times he’s been clueless / his quirky faults / embarrassing moments – you know the deal.

Tap up the groom’s family for any classic tales from his childhood and find out if the groom’s partner is giving a speech. If not – get them onside to dish the dirt. They might relish having their say and sharing the reality of living with him.

Ask them how the groom could become a better husband. Find out what he does that annoys them. Surprise him (and everyone else) with your inner knowledge of his relationship.

It’s simple really…

• Introduce yourself and how you know the groom 
• Script a laugh as soon as possible; within the first 20 seconds. 
• Establish the main theme of your speech (we’ll get to that next) 
• Tell a few great stories which illustrate the groom’s characteristics in action. This should make up about two thirds of your speech. 
• Then, bring in the ‘saviour’ – that is, the groom’s partner. Describe witnessing the groom fall in love and the influence their new spouse has had on them. 
• Pay a (short but heartfelt) tribute to the groom’s partner.
• Sum up your happiness (relief?) at their union 
• Pay a more thoughtful tribute to the groom; highlighting his best character traits and illustrating your love for him
• Sum up the theme of your speech with a funny line and propose a toast to the couple. 

The majority of best men resort to the classic ‘reasons the groom is an idiot’ as their narrative hook but dude, make some effort.

Rather than just a collection of anecdotes and obvious punchlines, build a narrative, a proper story, and make sure your speech is crafted rather than just a cut and paste job.

The theme doesn’t need to be complicated, it might just be a retelling of your bro-mance and its tragic end when the bride came on the scene.  If the groom’s now a vaguely respectable teacher,  reveal the alarming things he’s taught you over the years (snorting Sambuca etc). If he’s a wannabe musician,  chronicle his life through musical eras. Or use Yoda quotes to give him marriage advice if he’s a hardcore Star Wars fan.

Finding the right theme obviously depends on the personality of the groom but crack it, and you’re half way there.

‘Even with the funny stories, it has to have a point. Don’t tell me about the drunken trip on holiday or whatever; tell me something that has a meaning to it, something that ties into the theme of the speech. Even the humour has to feel connected and revealing.’ Eduardo Braniff, Men’s Vows

Don’t resort to clichés about him being a ‘top bloke’ without providing the evidence that he is.

Prove – don’t tell. Avoid using too many adjectives. Give specific examples of these qualities in action.

Pinpoint the things you genuinely like about him. Is he the only friend who shares your fascination with Elon Musk? Is he the one person who makes you feel better about your DIY skills? Is he still the mate with cool music suggestions?

Remember to keep it NUT – Nice, Unique and True(ish).

A confident delivery is half the battle, and not everyone feels comfortable public speaking. 

Make sure the groom has checked the acoustics of the venue & there’s a mic there if you need it (so many speeches are ruined just because the guests can’t hear them).

In advance, try to memorise the speech but don’t be afraid to use notes on the day. Delivering without notes is like ‘doing a wheelie’; pretty cool but, ultimately, unnecessary. It’s just showing off really.

So what’s best for your notes? Paper, cue cards or tech?

It comes down to personal preference but we recommend, old school A4 paper.

Mobiles and iPads are increasingly being used and they will inevitably become more prevalent, but we’re not convinced.  Tech may be what you expect a modern best man to use but it looks overly casual and sends out the wrong message.How many of us get annoyed when our loved ones get lost looking at a screen? 

If you decide to use paper, opt for thick A4 but only print 3/4 of the way down so you can maintain eye contact with your audience. 

More delivery tips in our Wedding Ideas article or in our Delivery Blog. 

‘When I’m preparing for a speech, I record myself and listen to it repeatedly. In the car, at home, wherever. I then try to improve it, record that next version and then listen to that repeatedly.

I keep repeating the process until the speech becomes this song, a melody that’s ingrained in me. Given enough time, delivering your speech can feel like singing along to your favourite song.’ Alan Berg, Public Speaking Expert 

What you’re aiming for is a conversational tone. You want the pace of a chat with your friends, anywhere between 130 and 170 words per minute.

Time yourself and check your pace.

A pause is essential when you expect laughter, and you should never talk over it once it lands. Speakers often move on from the joke too quickly and don’t give their audience a chance to react.

Body language is a biggie. As well as sounding relaxed, you need to look relaxed. An audience picks up body language cues. If you seem relaxed, your audience will feel in safe hands. 

When we work with clients in our Delivery Coaching Sessions , one of the things we often need to remind people is to… smile. It seems obvious but, even on such a happy day, people can often forget to look like they’re enjoying themselves and it is SO important. 

A smile is literally infectious, so make the most of it. Even a fake smile tricks your body into relaxing so make the most of it. 

‘My number one piece of advice would always be to time your drinks! You don’t want to hear your name called and realise you’ve had one too many to read your cue cards.

Something else I always notice in a great speech is eye contact. Try to consciously address the person you’re speaking to or about.’ Hamish Shephard, Founder of Bridebook

If you do find yourself getting heckled at the wedding reception, the first thing to bear in mind is not to panic. Even if you feel frustrated that someone has ruined your flow – take it in good humour and see it as an opportunity to get an extra laugh.

Use any laughter or noise that the heckler’s comment gets to choose your response.

If they don’t get any laughter then you don’t need to do much to win – a simple, “Let’s move on shall we…”, or “They say it’s good to talk but I think you’ve just proved it’s not always true…” should be enough.

HERE ARE SOME OTHER OPTIONS TO CONSIDER… 1. (If it’s a free bar) And that’s why the free bar ends after the first drink… 2. (If it’s not a free bar) And that’s why you don’t get a free bar… 3. And there’s another alcoholic who doesn’t want to remain anonymous. 4. You may laugh but because he’s here today there’s a village going without its idiot. 5. Of course one of the nice things about a wedding is that everyone has their role. The bride has to look beautiful, the best man has to make a speech and someone has to have too much to drink and make a fool of themselves, thanks for taking care of that for us. 6. I know the bride and groom had a long discussion when they were doing the seating plan about whether they could get away with putting you on a table on your own, in Luton.

Speech Do's

Check with the groom.

Anything he wants you to do (other than not abusing him)? Anything he’d like you not to mention?!?

Practice and film it on your phone

Watch it back, promise yourself you’ll do something about your gut and spot where your speech can be improved.

Have back-up notes on the day

Give a spare copy to a trusted mate in advance (or email it to your phone).

Do not rush

You might feel tempted to rush through it – but instead, imagine you’re a primary school teacher telling a story to a bunch of five year-olds. Get expressive, use your body and lose your inhibitions. 

Remember everyone wants you to do well so make sure you smile. It’s scientifically proven to be infectious.

Check out our guides

If you’re delivering a joint best man speech or you’re the brother of the groom, check out our specific guides. 

We offer a brother of the groom template is you need more than advice. 

Speech Don'ts

Don't thank anyone.

In the past, the best man used to thank the newlyweds on behalf of the wedding party but these days, the best man’s speech is all about providing the entertainment and a tribute to the groom. 

Don't ignore the feedback of friends

It’s always worth testing your speech out on a mate, but this also means you have to listen to them. If they don’t get a joke, don’t waste your time explaining it as you won’t be able to do that on the day.

Don't talk over laughter

You’ve worked hard for those laughs – don’t rush them. Always wait until the guests have settled down before continuing with your speech.

Don't resort to 'in jokes'

Remember there are grannies out there. And a lot of people who weren’t on the stag and won’t find the story about Tika the waitress and her hairy chicken quite so funny.

Don't mention the ex

Even if you have a wealth of material, sorry, the rule still applies. Don’t mention exes.

Best Man - let us help you!

If you want to deliver a legendary speech, work with us. We’re rated ‘excellent’ on Trustpilot and that’s why we offer a DELIGHT GUARANTEE on all our bespoke services. And, of course, in the world of Zoom, Whatsapp and Death Wish Coffee, we work with best men around the world.

Best Man Speech Template

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Wedding invitations, follow this perfect best man speech: tips + examples.

Written by  Shutterfly Community Last Updated: Oct 12, 2018

You’ve been chosen as the best man. Congratulations! It’s a great feeling to know that your friend or relative wants you to take part as his right-hand man in one of the best days of his life.

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One of the most important duties as best man is the best man speech. Traditionally the speech is given during the reception before the guests eat. Whether you are great with public speaking or a little intimidated by standing in front of a large group, we have all the tools you need in order to be best prepared, so don’t sweat it.

The Do’s and Don’ts For Preparing Your Best Man Speech

Don’t wing it..

Find a time a couple of months before the wedding to think about the things you want to talk about and write an outline. Most likely you’ll get caught up in best man activities with the groom and it will leave you with less time as the date approaches.

Do write a great intro.

The intro is the most important part of the speech because it grabs the audience’s attention. Try a funny one-liner, a story about you and the groom or even a compliment to his lovely new wife.

Don’t bring up past relationships.

Not only is it disrespectful to his wife but his wife’s family will also be there and will not want to hear about the groom’s litany of ex-girlfriends.

Do have a plan B.

Make sure you have the speech written down or outlined and have some jokes or points to cover if you are facing a tough crowd.

Don’t make negative jokes about marriage.

Even if you and the groom have an inside joke or if you have negative ideas about settling down, the audience doesn’t need to know. Also, don’t use curse words at any point during the speech, as you don’t know who in the audience you might offend.

Do practice.

Practice makes perfect. Going over the speech several times will ensure that you are comfortable with what you are saying and it will sound more natural.  Pro tip: record your speech on your phone’s voice memos and play back.

Don’t talk about the groom in compromising situations.

So you’ve seen the groom embarrass himself but you should keep that to yourself. You don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable or upset his wife.

Do congratulate the couple.

Make a toast, congratulate them and say what your wishes are for them in their new life.

Don’t make it longer than 7 minutes.

Although speeches are a fun part of the reception, making it too long can bore the hungry guests. If it’s a casual reception keep it to about three minutes, for a more formal setting seven minutes is more than enough time.

Do thank the guests.

As the groom’s right-hand man, make sure you thank everyone who attended and even the people working the event. It’s a nice gesture that will be appreciated.

A Simple Best Man Speech Outline

If you want a speech that is short, sweet and simple that is perfectly acceptable as well. This works well for smaller wedding receptions, weddings that will have more than two speakers or those that are a little more private. Following these simple steps will ensure a great and memorable speech:

• Opening line
• Introduce yourself
• Talk about groom/Compliment bride
• Propose a toast
• Thank the couple

Short and simple speech

Since I have everyone’s attention I’d love to say a few words to this amazing couple sitting right in front of me. For those who don’t know me, I’m Ed. Mike’s closest friend and sidekick.  We’ve known each other for about 11 years and have been on many adventures together. During that time, I got to know him well and can honestly say, he is the most selfless and stand-up guy I’ve ever met. I am thrilled to be standing here and celebrating him and his beautiful bride, Linda.

I am sure this union between two honest and caring people makes you all smile. Let’s raise a glass for everlasting love! Thanks for making us all part of this beautiful day.

Best Man Speech Template

Typically, a best man speech should last about 4-7 minutes depending on the party. While short and sweet is welcomed, a best man speech can also include more details such as how you know the groom and the bride, funny jokes, heartfelt stories and your well wishes.

Whether you want your speech to make the crowd laugh or shed a little tear, you may be wondering how to get started. We’ve pointed out several tips in our template below. Remember, a speech should always come from the heart.

How to Write the Perfect Best Man Speech

1 Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen. It’s lovely to see some familiar faces. On behalf of the gorgeous bridesmaids and not so gorgeous groomsmen, we’d like to thank you all for coming. 2 It’s amazing to see how far people will travel for free cocktails.

3 For those who don’t know me, my name is Adam. I am the best man and Sam’s very best friend. It’s an honor to be here and to be part of such a beautiful event. 4 I met Sam 20 years ago. We grew up together as neighbors in San Diego and attended the same school all throughout college. 5 He was the nice kid on the block who would go home and do his homework while all of us were out doing, well, the things we shouldn’t be doing. Can you believe it took me two months to convince him to toilet paper Mrs. Carter’s house? Mrs. Carter isn’t here, is she?

Luckily, as we grew up, he started making better decisions; one of them being this very special day. He is marrying his best friend 6 and the most beautiful girl he’s ever laid eyes on. Sarah, he said this to me just the other night and I promise no more than three drinks were involved.

7 When Sam introduced us to Sarah , we knew right away she was the one. For starters, she made him get rid of that horrible, beer-stained couch that he had since college. That alone got our stamp of approval. But mostly, we saw how happy she made him and how every time he talked about her, he would have a huge smile. We started seeing a little less of him, but that’s okay because we were getting tired of buying his drinks anyway.

For that reason, and the reason we are all here today, 8 I’d like to raise a glass to Sam and Sarah. May you have the life you always dreamed of, continue to fight over the remote and cherish making beautiful memories together. Find joy in the small things like Portlandia and expensive coffee and may sparks continue to fly forever. 9 Thank you guys for allowing me to be part of this special day and for trusting me not to ruin this beautiful moment (phew!). I’d also love to give a huge thanks to the staff who have helped make this night memorable.

10 Cheers, everyone! Continue to have a great night and come hang out with me on the dance floor.

Always address the audience and welcome them.

A quick opening sentence to welcome guests helps everyone feel at ease.

Throw in a silly joke.

A wedding should be fun and enjoyable. A joke will help to break the ice.

Introduce yourself.

It’s best to not assume that everyone knows who you are. A short and simple introduction will allow everyone to get familiar with the wedding party.

Talk about how you know each other.

Whether you are a relative or friend, talk the audience through how you got to be a special person in the groom’s life.

Talk about groom’s personality.

Use this time to make a joke about the groom or share a sweet sentiment. Mention any sports, skills or funny stories that people will appreciate.

Compliment his bride.

Acknowledging the bride is a must, especially because she makes the groom so happy. A mention of her dress, personality or the first time you met her is ideal.

Talk a bit about them as a couple.

Share things you like about them as a couple. It helps the audience get to know their dynamic a little better and it will make the couple smile as well.

Give a toast.

Raise a glass and cheers to the new couple. Including a bit of tradition makes the speech much more special.

Thank the couple and staff.

Everyone spent a lot of time preparing for the special day. Make sure to thank the couple for allowing you to be part of it and the staff for making it all happen.

This closing allows for any sort of instruction such as dancing, dessert or simply to tell them to enjoy the party.

Best Man Speech for Brother

Good evening, hope everyone is having a good time tonight. I feel very privileged and honored to be standing here tonight celebrating this lovely union. Two years ago, Matt gave the best man speech at my wedding and made a lot of awkward jokes. So needless to say, I’ve been waiting for this moment for a really long time! For those who don’t know, I am Matt’s brother, Mike. I first met Matt when I was two years old at our parent’s house in Boston. To be quite honest, I wasn’t thrilled because I really wanted a sister. And I think he knew because Matt would do ridiculous things like throw my toothbrush in the toilet, pour water at me when I was asleep and run across the room naked when I had any friends over. This made me less popular than I already was.

Matt always excelled in school, was captain of the debate team (apologies to Cara, but he can argue his way out of anything!) and can make a mean steak. The truth is, despite him being an annoying brother at the time, I came out winning in the end. Because of him and this beautiful night, I am getting the sister I always wanted. Cara, you’re beautiful and our family loves you so much. Thank you for making my brother so happy.

Let’s celebrate this amazing union and raise a glass to the newlyweds! On behalf of the groomsmen and bridesmaids, we’d like to wish you a life full of love, happiness, and joy.

To everyone who made tonight happen, thank you. You’ve made this night very special.

Sentimental Best Man Speech

If I can have your attention everybody, I’d like to say a few words. Thank you all for being here to celebrate this lovely couple. Now I would like you all to take out some tissues, because you are going to need them after this. For those of you who have not met me I am Rich, Joe’s best man. Rich and I have known each other for over 30 years, we met when we were both just two years old. We lived on the same street and our mothers were friends so naturally we also became friends.

I am an only child so Joe was like a brother to me. We became inseparable. We played in T-ball together and then graduated on to baseball throughout high school. When we weren’t throwing the ball we were skateboarding, watching movies or challenging each other in video games.

Joe was always hanging out at my house and I grew up thinking he was just part of the family. I remember asking my mom why Joe never goes home and mom would always say “Rich, Joe is the brother you never had, take good care of each other.”

What my mom didn’t tell me at the time was that Joe’s mom was really sick and his dad worked double shifts just to stay afloat with all the medical bills. So, having Joe around was our way of helping out.

Even though we were only in high school, Joe made it very clear that he wanted to have a wife and family of his own. His mother’s death at such a young age was really challenging and in some ways, he learned to cherish the women he had in his life more.

He knew he wanted a strong, nurturing and kind woman to be his wife. When Joe met Sarah he almost broke it off with her because he was afraid of losing her. I remember Joe coming to me and saying, “I’m in trouble, I’ve met the one but don’t know what to do.” “Scared is good”, I said, “It means you won’t mess this up”.

Sarah’s greatest strength comes from losing her father to cancer at a young age. When Joe and Sarah met, their commonalities bonded them immediately. Both missing the connection with their parents and understanding each other’s experiences brought them very close. I’ve never seen two people more meant for each other. From the moment they met in college, there has been an incredible and magical bond.

When I look at both of you I can see how your experiences have led you to one another. It’s as if your parents were orchestrating this all along. Even though your parents are not here with us tonight, they are in spirit and will continue to guide you in the right direction and are so very proud of you.

As we all gather here to enjoy this dinner tonight, I’d like to make a toast to Joe and Sarah. Two souls meant to meet and fall in love. I want you to know that mom misses you hanging out at the house and she told me to tell you that you are always welcome in her home.

Joe, thank you for being my friend and brother all these years. You are the very best friend a guy could ever have and I love you so much.

Sarah, Thank you for loving this great man and for taking Joe to be your husband. I know you both will take care of each other and keep the memories of your parents alive together.

Now that our napkins need replacing, I’d like to thank all the staff and event coordinators for taking care of this beautiful event.

Cheers to everyone, enjoy your night and if you have a chance, come find me and say hi.

Funny Best Man Speech

Ladies and gentlemen if I can have your attention for a few moments, I would like to give a toast to Mark and Melissa. I was a little surprised that Mark asked me to be his best man, after all, he knows how much I love to embarrass him. I’m thinking, “what a great time to leave a lasting impression of who Mark really is” in front of all his closest friends and family. If for some reason you did not know, Mark was chosen as the class clown in high school. He even got his picture immortalized in our class yearbook for this very title. Let me tell you, having Mark as a best friend was very entertaining!

He was always laughing, pulling pranks, and sometimes getting us in trouble (I certainly won’t tell them how we barely made it out of jail because you thought streaking through the grocery store parking lot was a good dare). We all had a bit of clowning around within us, but the one thing Mark always had over any of us was his way of making girls laugh. And I mean really laugh, not just a quick chuckle but downright laugh out loud, spit-up-your-drink kind of laugh. While we were all worried about how we looked to girls, Mark’s concern was always how to make them crack up. I remember Mark saying “how come you get all the girls and I don’t?” I never had a straight answer for him. Looking back now though, my track record only lasted a few months and for Mark? Well, what he didn’t know was that his “clowning around” was preparing him for the show of his life.

When Mark introduced me to Melissa I knew she was special. I knew this was who Mark was going to marry. She not only has a very infectious laugh, but she gets Mark to laugh just as much.

They say a marriage can’t truly survive without laughter and I don’t believe there will be a shortage of that with these two. Mark, remember when you asked me why you don’t get all the girls? Well, the answer is right there next to you. While you were out figuring out jokes and funny one-liners, Melissa was saving up for the greatest show on earth!

If anyone tells you that you’re a bunch a clowns just smile and say….who’s got the last laugh now? Let’s raise our glass to Mark and Melissa! Here’s to a lifetime of love and laughter! You are both class acts and I am proud to call you my best friends. I love you both very much and thank you for having me here.

To all who were in charge of organizing this awesome night, great job on making this wedding shine. I challenge everyone to a dance-off later tonight.

Hopefully these tips will have you on your way to writing a heartfelt speech. If you still need a little more inspiration, don’t forget to check out our wedding quotes . These are great to incorporate into your speech, write in a card or simply share as advice to the newlyweds.

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How to Write a Best Man Speech – Ideas, Tips & Examples

Amanda Green was born in a small town in the west of Scotland, where everyone knows everyone. I joined the Toastmasters 15 years ago, and I served in nearly every office in the club since then. I love helping others gain confidence and skills they can apply in every day life.

Good news: Your best friend asked you to be his best man. Bad news: You don’t know what to say in a best man speech. Don’t worry; we have a couple of tips for you!

Writing a best man speech requires a lot of planning, revising, and practicing. Read on to learn some best man speech examples and tips. Learn how long it should be and what to include in your address.

What Is a Best Man Speech?

A best man speech is a speech or toast given by the groom’s best man at the wedding. It usually comes first before the maid of honor’s speech.

The best man , sometimes known as the best person for gender neutrality, is the groom’s right hand throughout the wedding. He assists the groom from the planning process to the wedding day. The best man also organizes the groom’s bachelor party.

The best man is typically the groom’s most trusted buddy. It can be his brother, a childhood friend, or the man who knows him best.

A best man speech is supposed to tell a story about the groom and newlyweds. It is finished by raising a final toast to their future. This speech is an opportunity to publicly share how you met the groom and why you think the bride is perfect for him.

How Long Should a Speech Be for a Best Man?

Your speech should only last three to five minutes. The average person speaks around 150 words per minute. If you write 6000 words for a speech, you’ll take approximately 45 minutes to address the crowd. Yikes.

Can We Write Your Speech?

Get your audience blown away with help from a professional speechwriter. Free proofreading and copy-editing included.

Less is more, trust me. You can only write a maximum of 750 words for your best man speech. Aim for a short and witty speech. Don’t make it too deep and complex, or you’ll bore the audience.

Best Man Speech Outline

Every essay or speech, no matter the subject, has three essential parts: introduction, body, and conclusion. But what should each paragraph contain? I’ll break down each section for you.

Introduction

The introduction should grab the audience’s attention. Here are some introduction ideas you can try.

Share How You Met the Groom

If the groom is your friend, there is a huge chance you are his closest friend. Your introduction speech can be your favorite story of how you met. If it’s a family member, talk about childhood memories, like how he was an annoying brother.

Crack a Joke

You can make a decent speech for the happy couple without boring the wedding guests. Try telling a funny story about the groom, a wedding pun, or a knock-knock joke.

One tip to being hilarious in your introduction is to keep a straight face while telling the joke. It makes them think and pay attention to your toast.

Introduce a Recurring Theme

Aside from making wedding speech jokes, you may also introduce the theme of the wedding day to serve as a good foundation for your best man speech. You may also choose one of your own that reflects your relationship with the groom and the relationship of the fantastic couple.

A common theme can make your inspirational and funny speech more coherent. For example, you can say, “The special couple is proof that opposites attract.”

Read a Definition From a Dictionary

Not everyone agrees with this speech opener idea, but defining a word related to the wedding can catch people’s attention. For example, you can define “loyal” and then talk about the groom becoming a loyal brother to you and a loyal partner to the bride.

Read Something in a Different Language

If you want to involve international family members, practice reciting your speech in their native language. Hire a translator who can help you transform your sentence into a different language.

Body Paragraph

The body paragraph contains detailed stories and thoughts about you and the groom and the couple.

Talk About Your Relationship With the Groom

Include one to three stories about how you met the groom and some favorite memories. This will captivate everyone and leave a strong impression.

Talk About the New Spouse

Whether you’re close with the spouse or not, it’s essential to talk about them, too. Consider why you think this person is perfect for the groom and how they complement the groom. You may also share your favorite memories with the bride.

Talk About the Marriage

The third body paragraph discusses why their marriage is excellent. What would you say is the most important value that the couple practices in marriage? Why are you glad that the two people chose each other to marry?

Finish With Your Conclusion

The ending of a best man speech is usually a wish or toast for the couple. Give the guests something to do, such as stand up and raise their glasses to the happy couple. Top it off by saying, “May you love and laugh together forever.”

Best Man Speech Tips

Consider these tips when learning how to write a best man speech.

One of the most crucial wedding speech tips is to plan. Once you’ve been invited to become a groom’s man before the bachelor party, start collecting amazing stories and jokes you want to include.

Planning is more crucial if you’re creating a joint speech with another best man. Brainstorm ideas and bring the stories together into one excellent anecdote. Remember that a memorable speech has a narrative arc. So, make sure to keep it cohesive.

You might also be encouraged to attend other events that will lead you to lose sight of time. Plan to avoid the pressure when writing the best man speech.

Introduce Yourself With a Twist

The introduction is an essential part of the wedding speech structure. One of the most convenient speech openers is introducing yourself to all the guests. While the groom’s friends and family might already know you, other people during the evening event might not.

Most speeches usually start with a “Good evening,” followed by “I am [name], [groom’s name]’s best friend, brother, and best man.” But you can make your self-introduction more interesting using a joke. Here, I’ll show what I mean in an example.

“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. You’re probably at the wrong party if you’re at this event and still don’t know me. I am [name], the best friend of the groom, [groom’s name].”

Express Gratitude

Another tip for writing a star-studded speech is to step on the dance floor and thank the spectacular people in the event for joining. Thank the couple’s parents for raising extraordinary children. Then, thank the groom for being a loyal friend for life.

You can also throw in a few laughs by thanking the groom for having excellent taste in a groom’s man. Or have a one-liner thanking the bartender. These speech icebreakers will keep everyone listening to your toast. Here’s a good example showing what I mean.

“I’d like to thank everyone for being here with us today. Many of you have traveled for hours to participate in the couple [couple’s name] becoming one.”

Aside from introducing yourself, mentioning an inspirational quote, and thanking everyone, writing a best man speech also requires you to discuss your relationship with the groom. Discuss how you met him, how long you have known each other, and other stories.

Don’t forget to link this section to the partner to make it more meaningful. For example, the groom might be clumsy and messy all the time. Share how the bride is the complete opposite because she is more organized and neat.

Be careful about sharing embarrassing stories and crude jokes with the audience. Not everyone wants to hear about that one incident from your boys’ night out. Make sure to balance all the funny stories with narratives about the groom being a wonderful person.

If you are hiring a speech writing service, tell the writer about these personal stories to keep the speech relevant.

Below is an example of how to talk about your relationship with the groom.

“When I first met [groom], the love of his life was his Playstation 4. He would bring it to his room like a girlfriend and spend hours playing Call of Duty. [Groom’s name] loved me so much that he was willing to share his love with me.”

Focus on the Couple’s Relationship

Do not talk about your friendship with the groom longer than the relationship of the wedding couple. If you were there when the two met, share a story. Explain how you realized his significant other was “The One” for him.

You could also share how unexpected events and challenges only made them stronger. Your friend probably told you he was going to marry this woman one week into the relationship, and you thought he was crazy.

Share how the couple is such caring people toward you. If you’re his brother, they have probably taken care of you as a kid. Here’s a great example with more context.

“I’ve always known what [groom’s name]’s idea of a perfect partner is. He wants a beautiful, ambitious, caring woman who brings out the man in him. [bride’s name] ticks all the boxes. She even exceeds all expectations.”

Ask a Question to Answer Throughout

One way to write a speech in twenty minutes or less is to ask a question you will answer throughout the toast. Explore what you want the guests to know about the groom at the wedding party.

As you dive deeper into asking questions, don’t forget to tell amusing stories and insert quotes that fit the newlywed couple. This will make the glorious event more memorable for everyone.

Keep Your Best Man Speech Short and Sweet

You don’t need to write a long, bloody speech to get a standing ovation from the audience. Chances are, you’ve already taken a couple of shots during the event, so it will be challenging to give the speech from memory.

The best man’s speech is usually first in terms of wedding speech order. So, you don’t have a lot of time to prepare. Keeping it concise also prevents people from being restless in the following few speeches.

A good best man speech is around three to five minutes long. You can load your phone with wedding speech notes to avoid forgetting important parts.

Rhyme-Master Flex

Rhyming your sentences will keep everyone in the room interested in your speech. It will make you sound more poetic and intelligent, too! Consider this example.

“[name of bride and groom], I appreciate the chance

To speak on your special day.

After watching your first dance,

‘Love is real’ is all I can say.”

Finish Your Best Man Speech With Congratulations

The best way to cap off your speech is by congratulating the couple. Congratulate them on their big day and offer a toast to a happy marriage that will last for years. Make it witty, personal, or quotable.

It can be a line about relationships and love. It can also be a quote about a lifetime of happiness. Below is an example of a concluding sentence that congratulates the couple.

“The real adventure together starts today. I wish both of you make the most of every moment as husband and wife. Everyone, please help me celebrate this event by raising your glasses to [groom and bride].”

Practice With an Audience

As with every other type of speech, practicing your best man speech before the wedding is crucial. First, read the address out loud to yourself. This strategy will help you correct clarity issues and make humorous quotes more humorous.

Once you’ve edited the speech, read it to a friend and ask for their feedback. Once you get good feedback from a small circle, you’ll come out comfortably knowing you have a fantastic speech.

Limit Your Drinks

Don’t embarrass yourself by slurring during your best man speech. You can take one or two shots to ease the anxiety, but drinking too much can embarrass the couple and the crowd.

What to Avoid When Making a Best Man Speech

Some common sense will keep you out of trouble when making a best man speech. Make sure to avoid these.

Making Too Many Jokes

Making the audience laugh is cool. But doing it at the expense of the couple isn’t. Don’t tell too many inside jokes that other people won’t understand.

Making the Speech About Yourself

Remember that this is not your day. Don’t focus the speech on yourself unless you are explaining how you met the groom and bride.

Cracking Dirty Jokes

A wedding isn’t about smutty sex jokes. For some people, it’s a sacred day that doesn’t require you to go into elaborate details of PG scenarios.

Offending the Bride

Avoid sexist jokes that will offend the bride and their family. Say nice things about her. And focus on her personality besides her appearance.

Talking About Exes

Couples don’t want to hear about each other’s exes on the best day of their lives. The speech should be about them so as not to make everyone uncomfortable.

Best Man Speech Quotes

Here is a great variety of best man quotes to include in your speech.

Well-known and Inspiring Best Man Speech Quotes You Can Use

If I were writing this speech, I’d use one of these popular quotes from literature and culture like this: “As Oscar Wilde once said…” and then continue with whatever quote I chose.

“What I say is that, if a man really likes potatoes, he must be a pretty decent sort of fellow.” -AA Milne ”When you find people who not only tolerate your quirks but celebrate them and say ‘me too!’ be sure to cherish them. These people are your tribe.” -Anonymous “Who, being loved, is poor?” -Oscar Wilde “The most precious possession that ever comes to a man in this world is a woman’s heart.” – Timothy Titcomb “There is only one happiness in life: To love and be loved.” -George Sand “Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same.” -Emily Bronte “The secret of a happy marriage is finding the right person. You know they’re right if you love to be with them all the time.” -Julia Child “The best use of life is love. The best expression of love is time. The best time to love is now.” -Rick Warren “There is no more lovely, friendly, and charming relationship, communion or company than a good marriage.” -Martin Luther “You don’t marry the person you can live with—you marry the person you can’t live without.” -Unknown

Romantic Wedding Speech

“Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get—only with what you are expecting to give—which is everything.” -Katharine Hepburn “You know you’re in love when you don’t want to fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.” -Dr. Seuss “In all the world, there is no heart for me like yours. In all the world, there is no love for you like mine.” -Maya Angelou “To find someone who will love you for no reason, and to shower that person with reasons, that is the ultimate happiness.” -Robert Brault “Love seems the swiftest but it is the slowest of all growths. No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century.” -Mark Twain

Funny Best Man Speech Quotes

“Never go to bed on an argument. Stay up and fight.” -Phyllis Diller “It’s a funny thing that when a man hasn’t anything on earth to worry about, he goes off and gets married.” -Robert Frost “Marriage is not just spiritual communion. It is also remembering to take out the trash.” -Joyce Brothers “I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.” -Rita Rudner computer with slow Internet service to see who they really are.” -Will Ferrell “Getting married is like trading the adoration of many for the sarcasm of one.” -Mae West “Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed.” -Albert Einstein “Marriages are made in heaven. But so again, are thunder and lightning.” -Clint Eastwood “Being a good husband is like being a stand-up comic. You need 10 years before you can call yourself a beginner.” -Jerry Seinfeld

A Best Man Speech Example

Below is a short example of a best man speech.

Ladies and gentlemen, I am [your name], [groom]’s best friend and best man. Before I start, I want to say no flash photography, please!

[Groom] is a family friend of mine, although I first met him in dance lessons during high school. I’m not going to tell you he’s a bad dancer on this special day, but he moves like he has two left feet. We instantly became best of friends.

[Groom] and I have been through a lot together, including partying, problems, holidays, and, most of all, his wedding. Today has been such an emotional day that even the cake is in tiers.

In all seriousness, though, I have never seen [groom] as happy as he was with his Nintendo until he met the true love of his life, [bride].

[Bride] and [groom] fit each other like gloves. [Bride] is neat and organized, while [groom] is chaos personified. [Groom] is forgetful, while [bride] remembers all the small details, even the fact that [groom] did not reply to him on June 6th, 2019, at 5:13 PM.

[Groom], I am proud of you. We all are. After dating for [number of years together], you’re finally tying the knot with [bride], the love of your life.

I ask everyone to join me in a toast to the bride and groom’s future. May you build a loving home, share a lifetime of happiness, and hold hands in the journey of life.

Give the Best Best Man Speech

I hope this guide reduces your worries about writing your best man speech. This toast should be an opportunity to share your fond memories with the groom and why he and his bride are perfect for each other.

Keep the best man speech short and focus on the couple. Don’t forget to revise the speech as needed and get feedback from your friends.

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How To Write A Best Man Speech That Everyone Will Remember

Brevity is the soul of wit. and keep it classy, too..

On November 19 th 1863, President Abraham Lincoln delivered an address that would come to be known as one of the finest speeches in history. The Gettysburg Address is a mere 272 words in length and took Lincoln less than three minutes to deliver.

The speech contains powerful, moving language heavy with sorrow and deep with resolve and some of its phrases would likely have achieved renown regardless of its length, but to be clear, one of the reasons the Gettysburg Address was and remains such a powerful piece of oration is its brevity.

RELATED:  How to Write the Most Amazing Wedding Vows: A Comprehensive Guide

Any best man (or maid of honor, of course) looking to deliver a great wedding speech is well advised to take a note from Lincoln and keep it short. He’s also well advised to make it a bit lighter than the remarks the 16 th President delivered on that early November day.

And remember, being asked to be a best man is a great honor – with luck (and a lot of work and devotion), this man will only get married once in his life, and he is asking you to be the pillar of his wedding party. So you owe him, the new bride, and everyone assembled a good speech. It need not be a perfect best man toast, but it better be good.

How Long Should A Best Man Speech Be?

You may be able to find best man speech examples, but the best ones come straight from you. It may not be a good idea to follow a generic best man speech template, but to start your speech strong, you can go with a tried-and-true opening formula: introduce yourself. Briefly explain who you are in relation to the groom – are you his brother, best friend, cousin – and then quickly move on to talking about the man himself and his new spouse. Quickly because the speech is not about you, and because giving a great best man speech means being short and, for the most part, sweet.

The shorter the better, frankly. Look to Abraham Lincoln for inspiration and try to keep your remarks to under three minutes, which means trying to keep your whole speech to around 300 words or a bit more. 

Even if your best man speech is going to be partly off the cuff, make sure to practice the wedding speech, or a “draft” of it, anyway, a few times beforehand and time yourself. If you tick past the five-minute mark, you are going on for way too long.

Best Man Speech Tips

A truly awesome best man speech will have everyone happy, many people laughing, and have the whole room feeling better about the bride and groom. Note that a best man speech is not about making you look good – a funny best man speech should center on the groom and something amusing he did or said; an inspirational best man’s speech should center on an impressive act by or quality of the new husband.

You are giving a speech, but you are not its subject, so be a great friend and make your friend look and feel great. And the same goes for his new spouse, too: focus on your friend, then focus on the couple, then wrap it up.

RELATED:  How To Write A Killer Maid Of Honor Speech

Your speech should have a theme that you can touch on several times. It may be as simple as love and kindness, but identifying a theme for yourself will help anchor the speech, preventing you from straying off topic and rambling too long.

When making a best man speech outline, remember always to plan a speech you can deliver while being genuine. If you’re not a slapstick humor kind of guy, don’t try for that kind of humor. If you’re a known jokester who always has the room roaring, don’t try to lay on the life advice and words of wisdom too heavily. Your best man’s speech will be at its best when it’s heartfelt.

As for what to talk about, that’s really up to you: you were chosen to be the best man because you know the groom so well, either as best friends or family, presumably, so you know whether a funny story, a touching anecdote, or a bit of both is best called for. Just remember that not everyone in the audience at the wedding reception will know you well – in fact, half of them may not even know the groom well – so don’t get too obscure.

Remember that it’s always a good idea to mention how wonderful the wedding day has been and to acknowledge the ceremony itself and the wedding vows, to thanks all the wedding guests, to note the venue, the food, the music, and even the cake. The people whom planned the wedding reception will appreciate you noting all these details – as will the bride’s father and mother or whoever paid for the wedding. Might want to thank them, too, eh?

And don’t forget to end with a short wedding toast and wishes for a good night and a good life for the couple, and to then turn it over for a maid of honor speech. (And if this has already happened, make sure to acknowledge it.)

Best Man Speech Tips: When In Doubt, Quote Someone Else

There’s a reason so many speeches incorporate quotes from other people: a well-known quote has already been effectively vetted by many audiences, so you can count on it working for yours. A quote can serve as the start of your speech, as the anchor, or a great ending note.

So, what are the best types of quotes to use? Love quotes are always a good choice at a wedding, as are quotes about commitment, about the future, about trust, about kindness, and about friendship. Look for quotes that are either already well-known or are from a well-known source, be it a famous person, a popular song or book, or another source people will recognize.

One of the reasons quotes are powerful is because they are comfortable; they tend to work best when they re-confirm a notion someone already held rather than imparting new information.

Things To Avoid During A Best Man Speech

Alright, so we talked about tips for things you should consider doing; now here are the things to avoid during a best man speech.

First and foremost, be very cautious with the embarrassing stories. The line between a great best man speech and an abominable failure is a fine one indeed if you start in on the embarrassing story approach. If you have even a shred of doubt that an anecdote or joke you’re considering is crossing the line, leave it out. You can always share the more cringe-worthy stories with the gang out on the dance floor or as the cigars come out later, leaving that “he’s a great guy!” reputation intact in front of the larger crowd. 

And do not, repeat, do not drink too much before your best man speech, and don’t have more than one drink while giving your remarks, either. You can hit the bar hard later, but you can’t ever unsay things that slipped out due to a few too many cocktails or glasses of champagne.

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Two Barbershop Owners Chase Lost Girl Down The Street

At the Look Sharp Barbershop, Rafael Santana and Osvaldo Lugo were known for their precision haircuts, but one afternoon, they had to use their quick reflexes for a whole different kind of emergency.

A flash of pink passed by the window, and suddenly the barbers were racing out the door, scissors abandoned, to save a life.

They Sprung Into "Dad Mode"

Rafael Santana and Osvaldo Lugo were working through a typical afternoon at the Look Sharp Barbershop when the ordinary suddenly turned urgent.

Santana, a father of four, glimpsed a blur of pink racing down the sidewalk. Instantly, he knew something was wrong. When he saw the little girl running alone and heading towards a busy intersection, he shouted to Lugo, and both barbers dropped their clippers and sprinted out the door. As the pair chased after the girl, it felt like time was stretching out.

"I kept thinking to myself, 'You better get to her on time.'" Osvaldo Lugo

Despite the potential danger, the barbers' fatherly instincts kicked in, propelling them forward in this heart pounding race. Lugo's surveillance camera recorded the entire dramatic chase, capturing the urgency and determination in every step.

In the video, you can see Santana and Lugo swiftly closing the distance between themselves and the child, with seconds to spare. Fortunately, they managed to intercept her just before she reached the crosswalk. It was a close call, but their quick reflexes and courageous actions made all the difference. Take a look for yourself.

Watch Osvaldo Lugo's Video:

View this post on Instagram A post shared by Osvaldo Lugo (@obthebarber)

Then The Police Department Stepped In...To Thank Them!

After Rafael Santana and Osvaldo Lugo's courageous act saved a child from running into traffic, the impact of their quick-thinking reverberated throughout East Hartford. The local police department didn't waste time acknowledging the bravery of these two barbers. Within hours, the East Hartford Police Department posted a heartfelt message on their official Facebook page , publicly commending Santana and Lugo for their swift action and calling them heroes.

The post, which quickly garnered attention from the community, praised the barbers for their decisive response in a critical moment. "Heroic Barbers to the Rescue!" the post began, highlighting the quick-thinking actions of Santana and Lugo that prevented what could have been a devastating incident. The police department made it clear that the actions of these two men had not only saved a child's life but also demonstrated the power of everyday heroes in the community.

But the recognition didn't stop there. The police department took an extra step by awarding both Santana and Lugo with hero certificates, an honor typically reserved for citizens who go above and beyond to keep their community safe. This public show of appreciation not only demonstrated the significance of their actions but also reminded others the importance of staying vigilant and looking out for one another.

Despite the recognition, Santana and Lugo remained humble. "We did this out of love, and we'd do it a million times again," Santana said. "We protect and serve our community at all costs."

Not All Heroes Wear Capes — But Sometimes They Have A Pretty Sick Fade

Not all heroes wear capes, but sometimes they have clippers and a fresh fade.

Rafael Santana and Osvaldo Lugo might be known for their styling skills, but now they're also known for their swift actions and heroism. The certificates hanging in their barbershop serve as a reminder that heroes are all around us, and sometimes, the people you trust with your hair might be the same ones who could save your life.

"We're just dads with lucky timing," Lugo said, emphasizing that their heroic act was instinctual. Santana agreed, saying that being a father makes you alert to the world around you.

As the barbers returned to their chairs, they knew they'd done more than just save a haircut that day — they'd saved a life. The barbershop's regulars now have a story to tell, and it's not just about a great cut. It's about two barbers who became heroes when it mattered most.

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Childhood Sweethearts Shave Each Other's Heads At Wedding

Weddings are full of surprises, but Jony Macapagal, 20, and her husband, Alistair Lee, 20, pulled off one that no one saw coming.

It wasn’t a quirky dance or a dazzling fireworks display. Instead, they shocked their guests by shaving their heads at their own wedding. And the reason behind it is heartwarming.

After Saying "I Do," The Couple Shocked Everyone

When Jony and Alistair tied the knot at the Allely Estate in Kumeu, New Zealand, their guests were ready for a traditional Filipino dance, as is common at weddings. But this couple had something far more meaningful planned.

After their first dance, the DJ announced that they’d be shaving their heads — in solidarity with Jony's mom, Luna, who had been bravely fighting stage 4 ovarian cancer for three years. What might have been an ordinary wedding transformed into a deeply moving moment of unity, love, and support.

As Alistair sat down for Jony to shave his head, the room was a mix of laughter and tears. The surprise didn't end there — Alistair then took the clippers and shaved his bride’s head too. It was a powerful statement about their support for Luna and anyone battling cancer.

From Childhood Friends to Lifelong Partners: They Met When They Were Just 5 Years Old

Jony and Alistair's journey together began way before their wedding day. They met as children and went to the same school, sharing years of memories. After dating for three years, Alistair proposed to Jony in the beautiful Auckland Botanical Gardens. Of course, he made sure to ask Luna's permission first, showing the deep respect and love he had for Jony’s family.

Their unique proposal set the tone for a wedding filled with love and compassion. The couple's decision to shave their heads wasn’t just a touching tribute — it was a continuation of the bond and solidarity that had grown over their lifetime together.

Watch Jony Macapagal and Alistair Lee's Video:

The Bride Never Wanted To Go Viral

When Jony and Alistair shaved their heads at their wedding, it was meant as a private gesture to comfort Luna, who felt insecure about losing her hair during chemotherapy. Tragically, Luna passed away two months after the wedding, leaving the couple and their family devastated. However, what they didn’t expect was the attention their heartfelt act would receive.

Their goal wasn't to go viral but to show Luna she wasn't alone. Despite their intentions, the story spread like wildfire, catching the world's attention. Some detractors claimed it was just for show, but Jony and Alistair explained that they hadn’t shared any footage — their wedding photographer had posted it, leading to its viral spread.

Their Family Never Expected So Much Love and Support

View this post on Instagram A post shared by Jony Lee (@jonymlee)

Jony and Alistair's story resonated with people worldwide, triggering an outpouring of love and support. Jony shared on Instagram how grateful her family was for the positive response. What began as a personal tribute to her mother grew into a global expression of empathy and compassion. The couple never anticipated the momentum their story would gain, but they were grateful for the connections it created.

"My family and I have been overwhelmed with the response we've gotten from our wedding tribute to mummy. I know for a fact my mummy would have loved to give you all a big hug. She would love to let you know you are not alone and to stay strong." Jony Macapagal

Jony explained that although their donations page has since closed, the funds raised were donated to Cancer Society New Zealand. For those interested in donating, she encourages supporting any organization that has positively impacted your family.

If this story touched your heart, you can donate here .

Copyright © 2024 Goalcast

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7 Steps How To Write A Best Man Speech And Deliver That Killer Toast

Posted In: Weddings

By Jim Campbell | Updated on February 15, 2024

Congratulations on being chosen as the best man. This means you’re the right-hand man of the groom. While it’s a great honor to be the best man to your brother, friend, or colleague, remember that it comes with many responsibilities. You might need to look for best man speeches samples soon.

Aside from always being next to the groom during the ceremony, you also lead the pack in organizing a bachelor party , helping the groom choose formal wear, and practically being the point person of the groomsmen about the pre-wedding and day-of-the-wedding details.

Beyond the seeming wedding coordinator duties, one of your most meaningful tasks is delivering a best man speech. Before digging the internet for perfect best man speeches samples, we’ve outlined some useful FAQs and handy tips on how to write a best man speech.

3 Important Questions About The Best Man Speech

Whether you’re reading this as a bride and groom preparing for your wedding or the best man planning on how to nail a speech in front of a crowd, below are some practical questions to keep in mind so you’ll be ready for the big day.

When Does The Best Man Give His Speech?

Knowing the traditional order of speeches during a wedding will help you plan, avoid mishaps, and adjust accordingly to the situation. During the wedding reception, the father of the bride or her parents gives the first toast. This is followed by the father or parents of the groom. After the speeches of the parents, the maid of honor speech follows.

Then, it’s your big moment. The best man speech traditionally comes after the maid of honor’s speech. 

How Long Should A Best Man Speech Be?

Aside from thinking about what makes a good best man speech, one of the most important things to remember is to keep it at an appropriate length. As a general rule, best man speeches should be short and sweet. Try to keep it between three to five minutes max. 

You can spend about 30 seconds for your intro to set the mood, a good three minutes or so for the main body of your speech, and the remaining time to wrap it up and offer a toast for the newlyweds. 

What To Do If Your Best Man Can’t Give The Speech?

If your best man is not up to delivering a speech during your wedding, don’t take it against him. While it’s a big tradition that sparks laughter and wins oohs and ahhs from wedding guests, not all individuals have the knack for public speaking. If this is the case, you can allow someone to step up, such as another groomsman, a sibling, a cousin, or a close friend. 

Some modern weddings are less traditional and nix the best man speech altogether.

What To Say In A Best Man Speech

The groom picked you to be the best man for a reason. You do not need to pretend to be another person. You just need to be yourself and tell a wonderful story that would make your audience laugh, cry, or learn a lesson about love or life.

A typical best man speech template includes three essential elements:

Key Takeaway

When you stand in front of a crowd to tell a story, you want the newlyweds and wedding guests to remember one thing after you’ve left the floor. It will help if you highlight that thing that binds all the jokes, anecdotes, and stories you share. 

Spotlight On The Newlyweds

The best man speech is not all about your friendship with the groom. You want to put the spotlight on the newlyweds and celebrate their overflowing love for each other. You will be standing there to inspire the crowd on how the couple accomplished things together or how fortunate you are to know that the bride and groom found each other to spend the rest of their lives together.

Personal Insight

Remember that the crowd consists of people from the groom’s and bride’s sides. Whether family, friends, or colleagues, people could not be totally familiar with the bride or groom. You will serve as the bridge, so they get a glimpse of how the relationship blossomed and why you are happy to see the couple together forever. 

What Not To Say In A Best Man Speech

It is best to keep things positive when you deliver a toast. Below are some things you should never include in your best man speech:

• Details about the groom’s past relationships
• Money matters
• Past mistakes of the groom
• Sexual jokes
• Stories that may diss marriage
• Anything negative about the bride
• Foul language
• Joke about other cultures
• Joke about the couple’s parents
• Long stories

7 Steps To Write And Give A Best Man Speech

If you are feeling a bit nervous about how you will write and how to give a best man speech, don’t worry. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself. With some planning and practice, you can wow everyone at the wedding reception with your speech. Here are some handy tips on how to do a best man speech:

1. Go Beyond Reading Best Man Speeches Samples

While you’re the wingman of the groom, you should not wing the best man speech. Do not write it the night before the wedding (remember, bachelor party?). You need to do your homework, and plan and prepare weeks before the wedding day. 

The speech will focus on the couple but will help to know who the audience will be. You can ask the couple beforehand so you can prepare well. Knowing if the wedding will be an intimate affair or a big gathering can help you adjust what to include in a best man speech.

Aside from reading best man speeches samples and writing your own, part of your homework is to limit your drinks the night before or during the reception. This can save you (and the newlyweds) from a big disaster.

2. Create an Outline

You do not have to write the whole speech or memorize it. Often, writing an outline on a piece of paper or your mobile phone will do the trick. Your outline may include the following:

• Introduction/Opening Statement
• Congratulate the couple and say your thank yous
• Compliment the bride, joke about the groom
• Why you’re delivering the speech
• Share stories to build a takeaway message
• Close with a toast

3. Practice And Have A Plan B

Delivering a good best man speech will be a tribute to the newlyweds. Go beyond writing and reading best man speeches samples. One crucial step you need to make is to practice delivering it before the wedding. Practicing it aloud in front of a mirror or having someone listen to you and give feedback will be best. Please take note of your posture and body language, the time it takes you to deliver your speech, and other adjustments you need to make.

Make sure you have a backup copy of your talking points, just in case something untoward happens at the wedding. 

4. Nail The Opening

You have a few seconds to connect with your audience when you deliver your best man speech. You can introduce yourself to the crowd by sharing a story about how you met the groom, complimenting the bride and her wedding entourage, or reading a quote. This will help you magnet eyes and ears, so they pay attention to you the rest of the way.

5. A Dose Of Appropriate Humor 

Sprinkling some jokes can break the ice. It will help you and the crowd relax and set up the mood for the main points of your speech. Just remember to make it appropriate as you might have several generations, people from different cultures, or colleagues of the couple in the crowd. If you have to ask yourself twice if a joke or anecdote is appropriate, it’s a good hint that it’s not.

6. Drop Your Armor

When you speak before the people special to the bride and groom, you share a piece of yourself too. They need to know why you are there and sharing stories. Don’t forget the details that put the audience in the storyline with you. A dose of vulnerability when sharing your appreciation and admiration of the couple will help people understand why they are a good match. 

7. Offer A Beautiful Toast

Are you wondering how to end a best man speech? With heartfelt congratulations and a toast for the newlyweds’ happy future, of course. Deliver your closing line and ask the rest of the guests to celebrate with you and raise their glasses.

Bonus: Best Man Speeches Sample Prompts

If you’re stuck writing your speech, it is best to browse for best man speeches samples. Below are some prompts to help those creative juices flow:

• What are your wishes for the future of the newlyweds?
• How did you meet the groom? And why you clicked as friends?
• Why do you think the bride is perfect for the groom?
• What qualities does the groom have that you wish you have?
• Why do you think the bride and groom are perfect for each other?
• What was it like when the groom introduced the bride to you?
• How the couple brings out the best in each other?
• How the couple fits your favorite love quote or poem?
• How did the groom tell you stories about his partner?
• What was the most fun vacation you had as friends?

About The Author

Jim Campbell

Jim is the owner of Honeymoons.com. A lifelong traveler, Jim's wanderlust has led him to spend months living on the Mayan Rivera, instruct SCUBA diving in Croatia, sail from San Diego to Hawaii, and cruise the Caribbean on a catamaran. Jim launched his honeymoon business while planning his own honeymoon in 2019. Since then, he has helped thousands of honeymooners plan their trips through his honeymoon travel agency .

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